I just found out my 13-year-old had sex. What do i do?

Give me the address and I’ll will have a talk with the parents

Show your kid pics of diseases you can get then talk about how to prevent it from happening to them

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Be open, sit down and actually talk to your child. Talk about birth control, ask if they took precautions and ask what they would do if not. Sit down and treat them as a adult and tell them about std’s, expectations and if they have any questions. 13 is young and some are still learning their own bodies much less anyone else’s. Respect their privacy about this as it isn’t about you as a parent. This is about them and their body, it’s a life decision they made for themselves. Be there for your child and let them know you love them.


Educate her on safe sex and STIs, talk to her about contraception and offer to make her a doctors appointment to sort that out and go with her if she’s not comfortable going alone.

Understanding goes a long way.

Alternatively if we are talking about a boy, the safe sex talk is just as important and educating him on the fact that girls actually get pregnant if he doesn’t practice safe sex lol

Talk to them. Don’t shame or judge, just talk. Have the safe sex talk. Get them tested. Get them to take precautions (pill or something if female) teach them about STDs. You cant change what has happened. But you can educate to be protected


Please don’t do birth control if your child is a girl I know it doesn’t affect everyone the same but my parents forced me to get birth control, I got the depo shot the only way I was allowed to keep my boyfriend, well it ruined me quite literally it made me get serious anxiety and depression it made me suicidal I got 3 shots in total and it lasted in my body for 3 1/2 years, I got pregnant that’s how I know and I went to many hormone equality places, nothing helped it had to come out of my body naturally I’m 3 months postpartum and I’ve never felt better my anxiety is 60/100% gone and my depression vanished, even during pregnancy I could notice a change in my personality and behavior, I could control my emotions way better, I lost so many friends, and relationship with people I love with it. Please just talk about safe sex like condoms I wish birth control is better but it’s honestly the worst thing to me I’ll never let my children get it with my experience. It’s normal for people of that age to have sex now a days due to the generation just explain what happens and tell them it’ll change there life if they have a baby especially that young


Hell naw! Where tf was u at???

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All you can do is talk stay calm express your feelings ,not judgement as you want your kids to know they can talk about anything with you My 3 grown up kids have always thanked me ,that they knew they could come to me ,they knew that i did not like certain things i thought they were to young for but they knew i was always there to talk to and support them My love is and always unconditional

Im glad have a great relationship with my teen. I told her if she’s starts having sex she needs to let me know cuz there are precautions I have to take to protect her. (STD test, birth control, making sure she is aware of what can happen) She pulled me aside a few days after it happened and told me. I took her to the clinic and did the necessary steps to protect her. I’m blessed my daughter is open with me. But i felt the worst thing I could do was freak out. I dont agree with what she did but id rather her be protected,safe and honest with me. Keep your cool mama, your going to be fine and so is your daughter. follow your gut on what steps you should take.


Educate put the weather birth control or condoms explain about horrible diseases explain everything don’t be afraid to tell because they already know

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They will find a way :roll_eyes: Educate, prepare and provide them with the tools they need to be safe. Coming from a mom who’s child had sex at 14 while at the skating ring with friends

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The fact that you’re asking strangers for advice speaks volumes. TAKE CARE OF YOUR CHILD! You didn’t mention if you’re referring to a son or a daughter, but either way, they need care and education, and maybe you do too! I don’t mean that to be as harsh as it probably sounds, but as a parent you should be getting some professional answers yourself.




I raised boys and always told them if they were having sex and the girl was not on birth control, bring her to me and I would get her protected.


After explaining the consequences of these actions it’s time for real life examples. Find a friend that’s got a young child and see if they will allow your child to help out every weekend. The responsible of a child is not to be taken lightly. Having no free time for a month might help the child see the light

I’ve got a 13 year old and as a mom my heart aches for you. Be gentle with them, it’s not a choice you have to like but you want to keep communication open.


That age is too young and lots of factors but doesn’t matter gender… educate protection,( birth control, disease prevention and emotional drama) verify respect ( to self and partners) and teach them consequences ( the real facts in examples)and get professional advise if needed ( for both child and parent) FYI. With my child we had ‘free zone’ where any conversation/ question about any subject / issue could be asked/ answered/ discussed without parent/mom rules,discipline or judgement just me listening… then , giving advise, answers , pros and cons and etc in a calm cool matter. Sometimes hard to not scream get angry or say nothing and accept the kids decisions but seemed to work for us.

If it were me I’d give him the sex talk and make sure he protects himself

Get her to the family doctor if you have one. Make sure she is healthy, and get her on birth control. Talk to her and be there for her. Best wishes


First of all… how is this related to Halloween? That one confused me LOL.

2nd of all, I hope you’ve had the talk with him/her. A more serious talk about the “birds and the bees.” At this point, be kind to your teen. It’ll make him/her realize that although you’re upset, you still very much love your child. They will confide in you more. Connect with your personal friends who have kids. Asking on social media (random group with soooo many strangers) is a bit concerning. Perhaps bond more with your child? I don’t personally know the situation. I’m just throwing advice out there. Life is so much more then just sex. 13 year olds are just too young to fully grasp LIFE & all the responsibilities of it all. I personally don’t expect them to at that age. Kids don’t enjoy their childhood like they used to. But you also have to give your kid a childhood. Times are so different… Sex is so much more then what kids put it out to be. It’s not all about losing your virginity for the hell of it. You’re giving a piece of yourself away. Express self love. Safe sex definitely needs to be brought up!! STD’s is not a game to play. Birth control and condoms! Also… probably need to discuss the outcome of having sex. Not only is STD’s freaking scary… but the possibility of getting pregnant. Or getting someone else pregnant. It only takes one time for most to conceive.

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Talk to her about SAFE SEX because they’re gonna continue doing it. 🤷🏻 I lost mine at 13 too

Omg when I was 13 never even thought of it a sad world we live in today


male or female - discuss at length what not using protection could open them up to. yes, pregnancy is the biggie - but do not shy away from even looking up sexually transmitted diseases together. simply saying the name of one doesn’t hit home for what the symptoms and possible lifelong repercussions could be. I was on birth control starting at 15 for cycle reasons, but at least I was covered when I did begin having sex later on. make sure not to get angry, just take a conversational approach. what’s done is already done. the only thing you can do is move forward and teach them by showing in this very intense situation that they CAN come to you without there being a huge blowup or guilt trip. you want them to know they can trust coming to you no matter what and this is a perfect opportunity to demonstrate that.

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My grandson is 13 and so immature. I couldnt even imagine. I feel for ya but now is the time for some conversations and education.

If it’s a girl… birth control * I’m putting my dd on ,at first sight of a period * and if it’s a boy have condoms in the house , tell him to practice so there’s no mistakes during the act.


Talk to him/her without yelling and let your child know about birth control, std’s. Offer to make an appointment for birth control.

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Open up the lines of communication and educate, educate, educate … LOVINGLY😘

We found a way to fuck so will they… best thing to do is educate them


Have a very long conversation about s3x. Explain the negatives and positives of s3x.

My son is 13 and thank god I don’t even think he would even know were to start about having sex :hugs:

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I just want to know why you’re asking strangers for parenting advice about this kind of subject. Some things just shouldn’t be on the freaking internet. Maybe you should take control and parent your child and get professional advice. I know I sure in the hell wouldn’t want my mom dad blasting all over public Facebook for the world to see that I Just Had Sex. Maybe you should talk to them and not seek help from strangers.

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Honestly, ask her if she wants to be on birth control. And have a conversation about safe sex. Teach her that you are a safe person to be open with, don’t punish her for doing what most teens have done.


some of theses comments are so rude the person is asking for opinions not to be Criticized or be told she dont know how to be a parent maybe the parent is in shock. how about you offer opinions ad to how to talk to the young teen.

Support him or her, hopefully it’s through a relationship n not a one night thing. use protection and if it’s a daughter get her on the pill or depo or some form of birth control. Have a dinner at home n invite other over to meet, put cell phones down

It happens every day they aren’t the first nor the last don’t make them feel as though they are support support support

Support your kids. Make sure they have protection and understand the risks of underage sex. If you make them feel like crap you’ll lose trust and communication so just talk to them.

If you have to ask what you should do you should also ask what is it I should have done. 13!!! Wow.

Let the 13 yr old know if you approve or not, not that you can stop it from happening but to make your authority and mind over it be clear.

Ask if it was something desired to be done again. It probably is but if not, a question like this can lead to more chit chat about the child’s feelings and intentions.

Provide support by introducing the complexity and complications that may arise from having sex, not just what your child might need but the partner as well.

Find out who the other person was that engaged in sexual relations with your child. Gender, age, etc. Dont just assume the situation.

The more you know, the more you can help.

Give the safe sex talk immediately. Good :shamrock:

Talk to her out pregnancy and safe sex

Get her some birth control

Scream then chat with logic

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Talk about birth control! And STD. Give it to straight.

At 13 you still have control of where and who your kids are around, if you haven’t equipped them and obviously not discussed this already, maybe a serious reining in on their freedoms? Be aware of their location at all times, take the phone away, they can’t drive anywhere, if not with you- least make it difficult for it to occur again. Also safe sex talk, then go to your family doctor, how can you not be more aware of where your child is?

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What does this has anything to do with fall holidays :woman_facepalming:t3:

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Sit down and have a talk with em about protection n birth controll. Also if you make it ur rules no sex under my roof. Thats what i grew up to. No sex under parents roof

put her on birth control


I just want to send you hugs! I know that you’re very heartbroken right now and lost for words… but be gentle and loving with your words when you do find them with your child.
Sending prayers. :heart:

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Saw this exact same post (word for word) on another page i follow.

Teach them proper sex ed.
This is birth control
This is condoms
These are disease
This is what happens when you don’t protect yourself
No protection is 100%
Don’t make sex a taboo subject where they feel uncomfortable talking to you about things.

Make sure they’re protected, even if you have to provide it for them, and aware of all risks & facts.

Be more of a parent to your child.

Talk to her instead of asking social media what to do?

Idk man thats young but there are so many factors that could determine what to do. Just try to know your kid as best as you can. Thats all you can really do. And if you know them, you know what influences their choices. And you can go from there.

What can you do? Its already happened… You’re in trouble now, because its a lot “easier” the 2nd, 3rd, 4th, 100th time. Good luck.

when my eldest discovered her first real boyfriend, I took her down to the sexual health clinic and she got her own lesson in reproduction and birth control with just me, her and a nurse in the room.

Birth control. It’s really nothing you can do

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Make sure that is was consensual. Talk about protection and being safe.

Talk to them about being safe and let them know you’re someone they can trust to talk to about anything

OMG I must be from another planet ,13 and kids “Fucking”

Denisa Rae Klump Andrea Fisher Klimtzak I feel like we just talked about this!

Birth control baby birth control

You better talk to her

Atleast she told you? If you wana continue for the kid to talk to you, sit with them, and tell them the potential of what could happen, stds, a baby, tell the kid you have to let the other kids parents know, and go get the kid checked by the dr(if it’s a girl as my dr put it, if your grown enough for sex your grown enough for a Pap smear and a obgyn )


Take her to gyno. Get her tested. Speak with kindness and love. You should have a convo about respecting her body. Praying God gives you the right words to speak life into her.


Yea it’s a kick in the stomach to be told. Try to stay calm for yourself. Your kid ain’t going to really care. I mean I was scared of my mom. Bit I did as I wanted for different reasons than now.
But when my kid told me I was mad as hell. But it didn’t bother her. You can sit her down ask questions. But for you have a glass of wine and breath.


I would do a combination of most of this. Yelling will absolutely happen. Then, get a book of STDs with pictures, take them to their doctor for a full sexual health screen and they them on birth control if it’s a girl and if it’s a boy, scream some more, talk to them about consent and condoms. Talk to them about being emotionally ready for sex.


I don’t understand how they would have been able too ! I keep a very tight leash on my kids ! They would never be unsupervised at that age ! EVER !!!


My older child loved girls in high school to much I talked to him showed him what condoms are but when I went to work he did as he pleased and when I found out there were consequences but when I turned my back that’s when the trouble started but I had to work to pay the bills I sent him to my moms for daycare at 16 years old lol but that didn’t work either so you see sometimes you can yea h all you want to and sometimes they still do as they pleases you can’t watch them 24/7 it’s impossible

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13…the parents should be yelled at. Sorry. At 13 you should know what your child is doing at all times…my opinion👀


Teach safe sex, don’t yell it will just deter them from being honest with u. We gave my kids the “talk” then bought condoms and explained right way to use and let him kno to ask for them whenever he needs them bc I’d rather buy condoms then baby diapers!


Why the fuck are some people coming up in here saying parents don’t keep a tight ship? Kids will do what they will like it or not. Period! Stop being judgemental. All you can do as a parent is remain calm. Talk to your child. Educate them. Sex is a responsibility that kids don’t understand. Some don’t even have orgasms and won’t well into they are adults. Your kid should be able to talk to you about anything. While you may be disappointed you can express that but not blow up. Remain calm have a good talk. Let them know you love them and boy or girl they need to understand consequences. Disease and pregnancies. The more you talk to them and show them that you love them they will keep opening up to you.


Teach and provide PROTECTION and don’t think it will be the last time…we all know that. Nexplanon or Depo if this is a girl or condoms for a boy. Don’t yell or they will never confide in you again. Time for a serious sit down face to face. :woman_shrugging:

The amount of people who don’t talk to their kids about sex is scary. My 8 year old knows the basics and as he gets older and it becomes age appropriate…the more I will talk to him about machanics,emotions,protection and concent. I will also provide him with condoms because yeah no parent wants to think their child is having sex but reality is they are going to do what they want to do and it’s their choice and at the end of the day id rather be safe :woman_shrugging: rather than sorry.


I’m kinda on the fence here. I get the talk to her, don’t yell, go get her on birth control but On the other hand I’m like, how was she even in a position to be able to have sex? Anyway, since this is a advice seeking question my advice is to get her on birth control and talk to her about all the risks of having sex.

Have a long conversation with he/her, be supportive and make he/she is being safe.

Don’t yell, talk with them about any questions they have, get them an appointment with their Dr. And discuss their options for birth control and safe sex.


They are still mentally babies at 13. That is very young. They are still not emotionally prepared for a real relationship, or other stuff. Even though you feel like you are going to wig out, force yourself to be calm. You as the parent are supposed to be your child’s safe place to discuss this topic with. If you get tense or strict, often times it will backfire, then they will just end up doing it in secret anyway. And not come to a trustworthy adult for guidance or answers later. They won’t feel comfortable coming to you for help in the future if they have questions. Or end up getting themselves in over their head if something unplanned like illness or pregnancy or other concerns like partner violence happens down the road. Was it consented sex? Or peer pressure? Find out the exact scenario. Obviously arrange a doctor checkup for them asap. whether they are a girl or a boy they need to get in for a annual sexual wellness checkup now that they are sexually active… They need real medical answers and treatment and methods of protection. Sending prayers. At 19 I had sex and got pregnant, despite sex Ed class, and such in school curriculum. Don’t just say “ok kid, this is the birds and the bees. This is this and that is that. Glad we had this talk.” NO. Actually have a meaningful conversation with them about what sharing your body with someone means. And the new responsibility they have just unlocked. And also reassure them that you are around for them no matter what.

P.S. I’m a single mom to a very mature looking 10 year old girl on her period. So I’m already getting anxiety that my kid will end up sleeping with a loser/pregnant someday like I did. Or that she will be targeted by a creeper because she looks older than 10…already trying to have books available to read together, and age appropriate conversations about reproductive topic and what is safe touching or inappropriate touching, ect.

God bless. Sending good vibes to you fellow parent.


Can’t believe so many of you are ok with your 13 year olds having sex. They’re in no way shape or form emotionally ready for that. Hell, to this day I regret having sex at 16 because looking back I see how much it changed me!!

Question why YOU weren’t proactive knowing what she was doing BEFORE

Teach that baby what its like to deal with a newborn baby! Get them an electronic one and put itching powder in their undies that will set them straight real quick! :grinning_face_with_smiling_eyes: Can you spell S.T.I ?

Make sure they get the hpv shot(gardasil) hpv is cancerous we have lost a lot of teens and young men and women because of being sexually active and unprotected


Keep calm momma. Its gonna be ok. Time to have a serious heart to heart talk.

Take him or her to a sex Education course for teens. They have more extensive classes offered

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It’s time to have adult conversations. I would involve a therapist too. I don’t know all of the details but I’d be curious why, who, how old were they etc.?

Dont yell!! They won’t open up to you


Do NOT freak out on them…that will shut everything down. But open a conversation about the emtions and responsibility of entering into things that a 13 yes old is NOT yet equipt to deal with. Best of luck to you.:pray::muscle::relaxed:

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Definitely take them for an sti screening and have the talk again. Id recommend getting a long acting birth control if it’s a girl. If it’s a guy buy condoms and make both babysit a few times because all it takes is one stupid decision.

either way boy or girl get the 2 together with mom and dad if they are one . of each . have a long talk with them with a OBGYN with a film on giving birth with sound and ,ake them watch it . stop film every few mins. and ask are their questions yet make sure that they hear the pain that she is going through this works out 96 % of the time , DO NOT KNOCK SOMETHING BEFORE YOU TRY IT

Talk to her or him about it,that he or she needs you,say that everything is going to be ok that she or he isn’t in trouble that he/she needs to be careful & everything else that you teach them about sex.

I think we know we mess up. If you overreact it will be better hidden next time. I would sit down and see if there are any questions and maybe make some suggestions for a safe future.

Talk to your child about it ask questions make sure they were not forced get them on birth control


Just put yourself in his/her shoes and you will know how to talk with them

Talk to him or her and ask questions. I had sex at a young age but I grew up in a house where nobody spoke to one another. I had to go to someone else for information. She told me that I looked young and no guy would want me if I was a virgin. So I had sex. I didn’t grow up with a father. I grew up with my mother who worked nights and my grandmother who worked 11 am to 7 pm. I had questions but no one to ask anything. I know it is hard but try to think of what being a teen was like. Let them know of all of the what ifs. Pregnancy, STDs, Aids. Teach them of how important your reputation is. Take them to the doctor also. And pray because times have changed.


Make sure it was safe, provide condoms


She’s probably scared and needs her mama.

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Yell and whoop that tail


Put her on birth control. She isn’t going to stop


And then get some birth control

Yes sex is normal and natural and teens are going to do it…but 13 is tooooo young. Aside from the talks about birth control or stds, I’d be talking to my baby about peer pressure, trust and what’s the rush? Just enjoy being a kid!