I love my 3 kids soooo much, they are my life and soul. But I am so short and miserable when they whine and cry… it makes me feel like the worst mother in the world. Then I get mad at my husband who is completely amazing at everything. Maybe I’m not a good mom? not a good wife? or even not a good person? idk how do you know if your a good person? lol Like I ruined my own mother’s day with my anger. Now my husband left the house because that’s how he cools down from me getting mad at him. So no harsh words will be spoken towards eachother. I am soooo… lost. Please help me with words of encouragement.
97 Likes
Help a mama out and respond anonymously on our forum. I love my kids but have been so angry lately: Advice?
Think you’re worn out and need some you time. Time to let go and relax and become yourself again. You can’t pour from an empty cup
5 Likes
Burn out…its definitely a thing…
1 Like
Let dad stay home and you take a break !
1 Like
You need to get the kids outside. Don’t have them inside all day, or on the TV all day. Get them outside, it will literally change so much if you aren’t an outside type of person.
1 Like
We all get angry with our kids, husband or others. There is always a reason and perhaps you need to talk to a trained counselor, someone that is trained not a friend nor family member!
Sounds like your bunt out or have some depression. Not a bad person, we all need a break sometimes!
5 Likes
Do you think you’re depressed or anything maybe you should talk to a professional even without depression you can still be angry all the time
Could be depression. I lash out with anger when I’m depressed. Sometime I don’t realize it, until I get short with people.
1 Like
You’re not a bad mom. A bad mom would not recognize if she has a problem. Please see a doctor get blood work done. You are a great mom
2 Likes
I think you’re stressed and need to do something for you
Having to deal with covid for so long has everyone on edge from being couped up and it has tested everyone’s patience some times you just need a break
Overwhelmed-burnout.
2 Likes
I would suggest talking to a counselor to help you deal with your anger.
You need a break and you need to let that be known! I have the same issues. It’s okay to have issues, depression, what have you, no one is perfect, and no one expects you to be. You need to get a baby sitter for like two days and just chill, or get out and do what makes you happy
Not sure how old your kids are but I was struggling when my twins hit about 10 months. I didnt feel like myself and couldnt understand when id gotten to be such an angry person. I finally talked to my Dr when the girls were around a year and a half and decided to try anti anxiety meds. I feel like myself again. Could be something as simple as a hormone imbalance.
Therapy. You spund worn out and stressed.
It’s ok to take time for you. Don’t martyr yourself bc it won’t pay off. It’ll make things worse.
One day at a time and focus on your mental health.
That voice in your head that says “your not a good (insert noun)” you gotta do some deep digging and see who planted it there cuz that’s not “your voice”
You say you ruined your moms day with your temper, no shes a full grown ass women who shouldn’t let 1 interaction “ruin” her entire day, that’s alot of weight on you to carry (so I can only assume where that voice in your saying you’re no good came from)
Depression/Anxiety can do this. Might want to check with your doctor or a therapist and see what they can do to help.
I stayed angry at my household and would snap easily and while a lot of it was anxiety, depression played a role as well. I am on Zoloft and much better.
I feel this!!! I’ve noticed I’m depressed and grumpy alot. I take small breaks and garden
2 Likes
You aren’t a bad mother or wife. Hang in there. Life is hard. Being a mom is hard. Therapy would be a great place to start. This was me the past couple of years and finally decided to seek help. Talking to someone helps more than I would have ever imagined. I wish I could say more but you got this, sis. Even if you need someone to talk to on here I can be that person.
If you don’t get time away for yourself then make it happen as a mother you need and deserve it xx
1 Like
Maybe you’re depressed love… my kids give me anxiety when they get to whining and hollering too. I think thats just what they do lol. You’re not a bad mother or person for that.
Your kids can’t be your life and soul. If they are, you have nothing to give them.
It sounds like you’re burnt out and need a break. It’s critical to have your own life. It’s hard to balance, but your kids and husband need you to continue growing and filling your cup. Taking care of yourself is part of being a good mom. It keeps you happy and models healthy parenting to your kids.
4 Likes
I’m sure your a good mom & wife sometimes you need to take a break don’t b so hard on yourself
Talk to your dr. I’ve been like this and taking an antidepressant helped me.
2 Likes
Maybe u should seek some counselling.
A bad mom or bad person wouldn’t even be concerned if they were or not. That speaks volumes. You have 3 kiddos man that’s hard work! I have a 6 year old and am pregnant and feel like I’m losing it half the time. Becoming a mother changes your brain chemistry and the gray matter in your brain and you’ve done it thrice! Therapy personally saved my life. If you have access to mental health resources I’d highly recommend starting there. And self care is also so important when you’re a mother. Even just 30 minutes to yourself to soak in a bubble bath can do wonders. Just remember you’re amazing and your kids love you. But it’s hard to pour from an empty cup.
1 Like
I would suggest you going to therapy to try and get to the root cause of things so you can begin to address them.
You can not pour from an empty 
cup
Sounds like a burn out! Need to have you time 
Maybe speak to your Dr. Your nerves are off the roof and you may need something to calm you down for a little while. It also could be hormones. Sure hope you get better soon
Go to your doctor! This type of anger is not normal, ask me how I know, I was that mom. Being a mom didn’t come “natural” to me. I found myself being angry and fed up all the time. Please, go talk to a therapist! Please! It doesn’t make you a bad anything, you just need tools in your tool belt and a way to release all that built up stress.
Sincerely,
A mom that wished someone would have said in love, go to the doctor!
Maybe your hormones are changing. Could be your a little depressed which would be no surprise after the last couple years. Talk to your doctor and see what’s available, but don’t beat yourself up your not a person person because a bad person wouldn’t question their behaviour or even acknowledge it
Take a break (maybe a day or two off)
Look into depression
Counseling
But as parents we all go through similar emotions
I understand how you feeling as I do get the same when my kids fight whine scream carry on ect
It does take a toll but some self care & help
Does help 
It sounds like you need a break! Go do something for yourself girl. Go relax and pamper yourself!
2 Likes
I’ve felt like this 18 yrs ago, I had 3 , 1 year apart
Maybe just a me day is needed. It’s ok to just sleep, probably needed. It’s ok. Being perfect is impossible, failing your own expectations is what’s ruling you. Lay down. Just be ok in your skin. Take a hot shower and watch a dumb movie. You are getting in your own way
1 Like
I get that way with mine, too. It shoots my anxiety through the roof and it comes out as anger. If I’m not taking my meds it’s 1000x worse. Definitely speak with your doctor.
you’re not a bad mom, just over-stimulated
3 Likes
Take some tome for you each day. Also maybe you and your husband need a weekend getaway and just talk threw things.
See a doctor for depression. I know it sounds crazy, but I used to be that way too. Medicine has made a world of difference. Your kids & your husband will thank you & you’ll feel so much better. Hugs sweetie
1 Like
Try living in the now and day by day don’t focus on yesterday’s and tomorrow’s Suffield is enough for today if you don’t have relationship with Jesus you should try best of luck Hun
Talk to your doctor. I was short and angry with my kids and turns out I had depression. An antidepressant medication really helped me be such a better mom and person over all
Prayers for you. I really understand. I was the strict parent and my husband was less than strict. We had some hard times. Then kids moved on as adults. We spent the last ten years enjoying the little things together before he died.
Sounds like your burnt out and need some time to yourself for a couple hours 
1 Like
Sounds like depression. You know you’re unreasonably angry but can’t stop it and get frustrated with your family despite loving them. It doesn’t mean your reasons for being irritated are invalid, depression just makes things seem much worse. I strongly suggest going to therapy and possibly getting on an antidepressant. I denied mine for much longer than i should have and i regret not getting on medication sooner. Also, take a day to do something for yourself, it would probably help your mental health a lot. I still need mental health days where i go out with another mom, no kids, we take our time eating lunch and talking and then usually go shopping somewhere, i come home feeling so much better and ready to hug all over my kids.
1 Like
You need to get help! It’s not normal to be excessively angry for no reason. Your husband is going to get fed up and leave and could use it against you.
2 Likes
Depression and anxiety can do this. If you’re not getting therapy, I’d suggest starting there.
Could be a little exhaustion
Anxiety is very real. Talk to your dr
You are burnt out, exhaustedand overwhelmed. I’m in the same boat.
1 Like
You got this. We as moms go through alot. Only moms get it. Give your self breaks do for you for once. It will help.
I get like this from time to time. I make myself feel guilty at times because I feel like I have no patience sometimes. You need to make sure that your cup is being filled. You can’t pour from an empty cup. Take a me day and ask the hubby to watch the kids.
If you can,go get your nails done or maybe a hair color change…
The only way I survive is by taking some time weekly to myself!! Period. #momof5
I still have a 4 year old and 15 year old Autistic home. I also work and handle every other aspect of the house. Except the yard. I need and deserve a break! Therefore, I take it.
Girl sounds like u need some self care time for urself best advice, ask hubby if he would mind if u took some time for urself to get back ur sanity ( ask a best friend, sister inlaw or someone ) u can have a good half day with go for a spa, even to a beach , something u haven’t done in along time for me I just need atleast half hr I go for a shower let the water cleanse my body once out I’m all good and continue
I’m in the same boat, so much that I made myself an appointment with the doctor… good luck
Overstimulated asf. I understand so effing hard lol.
You know what lovely, some of us aren’t awesome got it together mums, some of us are hot messes who drag them selves out of bed everyday to face a new day of hell. It is what is. However, there is an up side. You can change it. Start with the basics, change the way you look at yourself. Until that voice in your head stops with the shit talk, your probably going to continue to continue on a down buzz. Get some counseling maybe, talk to someone anyone who can help you gain a bit of perspective. It’s tough, but not impossible. Good luck x
Anxiety and overwhelmed
Maybe your dr can give you something mild for depression and anxiety it has done wonders for me
Maybe just need some time to yourself every so often?
2 Likes
If I’ve learned anything as a mom-it’s that bad moms don’t recognize or feel sorry when they’ve lost their patience. And trust me, we know you love your kids—mom guilt is a thing, give yourself grace. If it lasts longer than a few days and seems to be getting worse, talk to a doctor. There’s also no shame in needing a little help sometimes.
2 Likes
I used to be like that. Went to the doctor and he put me on Xanax. It was my anxiety.
1 Like
Anxiety burn out… overwhelmed… exhausted. It’s not you and clearly you’re a wonderful person from the tone in this. You don’t WANT to act like that but it just comes out. Happens to the best of us… actually happens to all of us!!! Motherhood is the hardest thing in the world and lacking independence, confidence, freedom is so draining… just remember to be true to yourself and always take a step back and a breather before going in to complete panic/anger mode.
1 Like
Burn out is real.
Try getting a sitter and doing something for yourself once a week. Even if its just a quiet walk or the gym or whatever.
Communication with your husband is so important too. You say he’s amazing so hopefully it’s well received. Hang in there. Don’t beat yourself up but please try.
Sounds like you are stressed & overworked. You need to make time for yourself.
Sounds like you need time for yourself…
It sounds like you need a break and some mom time. Self care also includes allowing yourself some grace. Get some space, do something you enjoy, breathe.
1 Like
Maybe get a hormonal check, I always get cranky around the time my periods are due. And I agree with everyone else, that you could use a weekend off. When my bubs were little I got a weekend away once a year, lol but still it was a life saver.
Yup. Sounds like some self care is needed. Even if it is just talking to a therapist for a hour a week or alone in a bath tub for an hour a week. You can’t pour from an empty cup!
You are NOT a bad mom. I get like this when my depression and anxiety are off…
Do you set time aside for yourself everyday? Hang out and vent to a friend? Talk with a counselor? Exercising for mental health is what keeps me doing it.
1 Like
Count to three before you say nasty things to people.
1 Like
I get that way. I believe it’s because I put unrealistic expectations on myself. When I feel that way, I just try to shut my mouth and do something that gets my mind right-or at least on something else for a moment. Don’t be so hard on yourself, try to take a hot bubble bath by candle light.
1 Like
I was having an okay day then had to get my daughter to the dr on the ONE DAY my sons bus was late and I was rushing from work and had to go grocery shopping. I shed a few tears on the way home so the kids wouldn’t see me. Sometimes you just need a break. Get a sitter and go on a date night or leave the kids with the man to handle and get a massage or anything you enjoy. I go tanning twice a week to keep my peace and my head together. I used to be that way but I worked through it alone and I am proud of my progress
Sounds like depression, anxiety or bipolar disorder honestly all 3 of them have a side effect of anger (I should know I suffer from all 3). Go see a doctor please for your mental health
So you should check out DBT. If you’re in therapy bring it up to your therapist. If not you can look up worksheets and workbooks to work thru at home. It’s one of the treatments for BPD, BUT I’m a huge believer in it’s great for everyone, any sorta DX or not. It’s basically a life skills workshop on how to deal appropriately when things are overwhelming. I honestly think it should be like a required HS class just cause its just some really awesome coping skills presented in a super accessible way.
1 Like
It sounds like you need some help. Find a group or a counselor to talk to. Sometimes we can’t do it alone.
It happened to my sister too. Lexapro works wonders.
Maybe look into taking an anger management course? 
You should learn to meditate. If you feel you can’t here’s a good start. Sit in a quiet place even if it’s just 5 minutes. Close your mind to completely of everything. Then start thinking of a good time in your life and build from there when you mind wanders go back to the start. If you can get through one good time in your life then start working on how you feel and then you should be able to answer that question
It seems like you not making time for yourself
2 Likes
Seasonal depression…idk where you are but it’s everywhere right now lol
2 Likes
When is the last time you stepped away to recharge? Massage, spa, shopping, pedicure, whatever… IMO I would take a break and spend an afternoon doing something for you.
4 Likes
Oh no. I change birth control. Best thing ever. Now I feel like my silly self. I use to feel horrible. Hated everything and everyone. Wanted to choke my partner. Because he seem so happy. 
I talked to my ob and just change it.
Okay so I actually just talked to my therapist about this the other week. She told me that anger is usually a secondary emotion, meaning that if we think about why we’re angry you can usually pin point a few other emotions and reasons why your emotions are coming out as anger. For example, for myself I was getting angry at my fiance for Hella things, and when I talked to my therapist about it we were able to pin point I felt like I was doing everything alone so I felt overworked. I felt out of control because I will be going on maturity leave soon and not contributing to the income (which is super abnormal for me). Hopefully that helps a little 
1 Like
It happens 
mommin’ ain’t for the weak. Just keep going and make a conscious effort to do better.
1 Like
You need a break. At least once a day or once a week take some time out for yourself. Ask your partner to try and help you. Also talk to your doctor about depression. I’m not saying your depressed but anger and anxiety/depression goes hand and hand. Trust me I know.
1 Like
Sounds like u need a break 
1 Like
I get that way with my depression.
You are fine. Our kids go thru stages and some of them are difficult. Ask God for guidance and help. This too shall pass
Hug your hubby and tell him you are going to see the doctor to find out whats causing this…
Maybe check out therapy too
Therapy can help with emotion management. Taking parenting class helps a lot too. I didn’t think I needed them until I took them. I learned a lot about gentle parenting
1 Like
Take a break go for walk, jog or take a exercise class
Sounds like you need a vacation. 
1 Like
Take a me afternoon! But Maybe work on teaching kids to whine less, remind them that when they whine & cry you can’t understand them clearly and they may get what they want faster when they speak clearly and ask nicely, depending on their ages it can do wonders plus no one wants an older whiney kid around. teach them for your sanity and so they learn how to be good humans! Give them rewards for doing it less like stickers or small treats.
2 Likes
I deal with this a lot as a single mom of three and very frustrating relationship with my youngest daughters dad and I have major issues with my anger. I just get real irritated by the the simplest things and it’s because I never get a break, I’m burned out. Some of these suggestions from people seem to be a idea to help myself also!
You have have yet to experience real anger, thats reserved for you yourself after you destroy your current family dynamic and later on when you want your kids to come visit but they dont have much time because they have to squeeze in therapy sessions into their busy lives because of the turbulent dysfunction your letting them grow up under, you might want to learn to emotionalize the positives and problem solve the negatives before its too late
3 Likes
Believe me, I’m a single mom in a city where I don’t have anyone BUT my child. Anger/frustration/depression is a real thing, and we need to take time for ourselves to remind ourselves that we matter, we’re more than mothers, more than workers, we’re not robots with no emotions. Easier said then done bc we feel guilty when we leave the kids to go do something just for us, but it is SOOOO necessary! Doesn’t have to be all day, even a couple hours for yourself will make you feel brand new(ish). Mom burnout is a real thing, we all need to remember to take time for ourselves.
1 Like