I need advice about this tough situation

You have received good advice in reaching out to Adult Protective Services (for exploitation). Believe me, if you take your friend to the bank and do what the cousin asks, it will come back to haunt you.

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Do what your heart is telling you to do. You already say you love her and want to protect her.

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Talk to APS! Aps will advice u. U can have the courts appoint poa so family is not involved. CALL APS! BEEN THERE

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Even if the son is states away I’d ask him to POA, if he’s not wanting her money he’ll be the best one to protect it. Glad this woman has someone like you looking out for her. I would follow your gut, it sounds fishy to me.

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Call her attorney before doing anything.

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Do nothing until after you have talked to APS again. Re iterating the fact that you are the carer and not family. And you are not in a position to revoke the POA. Get them to do what they are being paid to do. If not successful I would get the son (if most of the money going to him in the will) pay for the Lawyer to get this sorted out. Sounds like the POA is dodgy anyway and even worse with what they want you to do with her bank accounts. Early dementia too. I would get a Dr involved to test her to see if she has enough faculties left to make her OWN decision. It may turn out that on the whole she is perfectly capable of doing so. Get him to attest to the fact that she able to make her own decisions. side note. Stress will make her dementia worse. Maybe have a Dr come to you.

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Sounds like you know what you should do

PLEASE DON’T DO IT!!! That can come back against you because you have no authority to do that. This is from one care giver to another.

The son can still have a POA if he’s far away. Its really his job to protect his mother and her assets

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I believe the courts can assign POA/guardianship from a third party person. Contact an attorney

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I would not get involved

You need to report this to the police as elder abuse. If you are a licensed home care provider, it’s your duty and the law.

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Call a lawyer and continue to speak to APS. The courts can appoint a legal guardian outside the family, which clearly needs to happen.

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Call APS and her lawyer and let them battle each other out.

Don’t take her to the bank.
Contact adult services they will assist you and guide you on how you can help
If you need to be the POA so be it that would be the right thing to do. You can also call the California Legal Services and get some idea of what to do.
Good luck
#DOtheRightThing

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Have the lady go see an attorney of her choice. If she’s able. Let her speak for herself. Unless she’s deemed incompetent she can do that. He then can get the court to revoke it. Also call the elder abuse holiness for advice or protective services.

Simply put I would not do what her power of attorney is requesting. Banking is a very personal thing. She could contact a lawyer. You are there to care for the patient…and not do her banking. All the best to you.

It’s really the sons call since he is next of kin.

Call a lawyer, something doesnt add up. Would think a bank would require to see the POA papers and talk to the cousin before anything changed. Unless you are also a POA for financial you shouldnt be allowed to open/close accounts.

Might read this so you know what all she needs to do.

Only the courts can assign or change a POA…I would try to contact her case manager and explain that you feel they may be trying to defraud her…You could also call elder care fraud division and get advice from them.

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Hire an attorney who specializes in estates and wills. In Michigan when my grandfather died the way their will was set up or the way it worked I’m not sure which it was an account had to be opened with the money and the account had to be labeled as a trust account. That cousin’s asking for some prison time especially if there’s a will because you could not close accounts and reopen accounts. It’s technically needs to be put into a trust I believe. You can hire a power of attorney through your local Court. If nobody wants to accept the responsibility but everybody wants her money hire a power of attorney and give the money to him maybe they’ll jump up to the plate and start accepting some responsibility. Although in situations like this it’ll be just an acceptance of responsibility backed by financial gain. Bottom line money talks maybe if you’re digging into the money they stand to inherit they’ll step up to the plate and take care of their family member.

Revocable trust, court appointed trustee, entire estate goes to her care while alive, — bye bye POA, and there are better tax benefits

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Don’t take her to the bank
To open a new account as it sounds like her family want to access her accounts for their own needs

The P.O.A is nil invoid as it wasn’t done legally

She trust you,the cousin is trying to steal her money ,is your place due to the trust she has in you. Speak to her physician about her mental status and follow thru

ONE HAS to have POA n intreme poa Dont do anything as what she wonts you to do is not legal . Stay out of it … Take Care …:thinking::rose::rose:

Biological or not that is still her son. Therefore he is next of kin. That is if she legally adopted him. Your lady left everything to her son, nobody can touch that. And if they go to… Well her estates person and his lawyer will have fun 🤷

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have son be placed as POA and have you be primary directive of care to make her decisions on his behalf if need be… that way he can make sure she’s always ok and he seems to trust you with her care, so its a win-win! plus even with dementia she can make changes to her willl as long as primary parties are in agreement with her mental state(in good standing at the time of change)!

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Its so a shame shes still alive people will do aything for money but forget this eldery person needs love, comfort and safety strongs with everything hope someone can help you and thank u for caring and loving keep up the good work God grace upon you

She is a vulnerable adult. Please make the report. Don’t let this cousin over take this woman’s things. Call social services for help if you need to.

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Did the cousin see an attorney to have formal POA docs created and executed? POA is only good as long as that person is alive. Once the individual passes away, POA is null and void. In order for a bank account to be opened jointly/with other authorized signers, all signers need to physically sign documents at the bank. If Don truly doesn’t want to help, then I would reach out to an attorney to help set up a trust and have them manage her financial affairs. Good luck!

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This lady needs ur support if u feel its not right u should report this to official person who can protect her wishes .u wud be doing the right thing by the lady u care for ultimately protecting her and her wishes this is the only right thing to do .

As a caregiver I am assuming you are a mandated reporter. Time to report possible financial elder abuse. Plain and simple♡ good luck to you♡

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You had me until you said “the son is adopted, and has only known her 30 years “. Adopted is the same as biological. If she raised him, he’s her son.

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Yes report this… Also see if you can set up a conservatorship so no one gets anything unless it is through the conservatorship. This will protect her. And if you stand to gain nothing from her death than I believe you, being her caregiver can help set this up for her and set up the rules to protect her. I would definitely consult an attorney for help

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Get her a lawyer and if u do be her poa make it do that in contract you do not receive any money then what ur owed for care and take the best damn care of her cause obviously no one else will make sure that the money goes where she wants it while she still can remember and think u gotta act fast ur saying she’s getting signs of dementia

If you’re her friend it doesn’t matter your place. Seek legal counsel and see what they say. Poa doent need to be blood so long as their best interest is at heart. Also even though she has dementia it is not your place on if she can change her will. Seek an attorney and if required a dr to see if she is in the right mind when she chooses this. Dementia patients from my understanding have good and bad days. Find a good day and see what she says.

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If no family wants to be responsible, there should be a public administrator in her county. Contact them

No, if there is no legal documentation signed by the client making her the POA please don’t do it.

Do not do anything do not take her to the bank

Talk to her Lawyer first before anythibg

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The son is her next of kin either he needs to be power of attorney or a lawyer needs to be appointed to handle her estate and funds.

If she had dementia she’s not in the proper frame of mind, so legally she can not make adjustments to her will.

You or the son need to call adult protective services & let them sort it out.

But in the mean time do not under any circumstances take her to the bank. Her son also needs to contact a lawyer to get things properly worked out.

Find a lawyer who will be her power of attorney/estate trustee but if she is in the early stages of dementia she may not be deemed of sound mind and then no lawyer would be able to create documents for her. I’m assuming she has a will, if not and she hasn’t been deemed incapable of making her own decisions I would get her to a lawyer ASSP or find one who does home visits to get these documents done immediately

I would never do that. We have guardianship/conservatorship of our adult daughter.

You had no legal right to help her. The POA has to do it. And then it has too ok go through the court each year.

get son and lawyer to discuss it.

The son needs to step up!