I quit my job because my manager put his hands on me: Was I wrong?

So I just quit my job because my manager on Monday night put his hands on me, and they did an investigation and said they saw him on camera grab me and will do nothing about it because me and a cook were going at it because the cook told 2 other servers “mind your business b****” & asked me “what the F are you gonna do about it?” I was yelling and was unprofessional of me, but the big boss says my manager was ALLOWED to grab me by my arm and dig his fingers into my shoulder out of anger because I was “unresponsive” to my manager YELLING at me. Mind you this man is about 6’3. I’m 5’2. I quit because how is my manager allowed to lay a hand on me? Me and the cook weren’t even near each other we had a whole pass bar between us. Just need some advice

75 Likes

Absolutely not. He needs to keep his hands to himself. Go for unemployment you’ll win & I would go after the manager legally.

That is a lawsuit…

Lawyer! Now! Before they delete the tape

2 Likes

Absolutely not cool. Report to BBB and local police

1 Like

Thats a lawsuit get a lawyer he can not put his hands on you no matter what

3 Likes

Coming from another server. If you were out of control then yes he had a reason. He was removing you from the situation. He was being a manager.

25 Likes

Well there you go. You were a fool and you got what you deserved. Simple

23 Likes

Make a police report for assault

2 Likes

No way should any one put their hands on you for any reason

3 Likes

Lawyer…Get the video somehow will help your case

3 Likes

Call the police and get a lawyer

2 Likes

Call the police and file a report so they can get the video before the manager destroys it!! Then call a lawyer and file for unemployment. He had absolutely no right to put his hands on you!!

4 Likes

Should have beat his ass

Oh no! Call the cops and press charges. They will want to watch the tapes. Yes, you aren’t innocent, but he is not allowed to do that!

Filed lawsuits and take them to court dont let them try changed your mind that’s how they do!!!

So you’re allowed to get out of control and no one can stop you? Awesome LOL Play stupid games, win stupid prizes.

29 Likes

Also go to the er and get any finger marka or scratches everything documented. Then go to the police station and file a report

1 Like

No one is allowed to lay hands on you…file a police report for battery

Always always always more to the story when I see this type of stuff. :unamused:

18 Likes

I’d have quit too. You are not in any way wrong for that.

You should of called the cops

2 Likes

he was breaking up an altercation between multiple employees… if you were being belligerent and not listening to what he was telling you then of course he’s going to physically pull you away… just be thankful you had a job to quit days later instead of being fired on the spot

23 Likes

I’m the original poster and let me tell you guys I was not acting crazy. Me & the cook were arguing yes but he was also arguing with 2 other servers so why didn’t he lay hands on them? I know I shouldn’t have argued with him but for my manager to grab my wrist very strongly and dig his fingers into my arm leaving marks is NOT ok. At work you are NOT supposed to touch anyone

2 Likes

Sue… an hes a Male an ur a female go fill oit a report from.the police station

Uhm WHO did an investigation?? Obviously not the cops because they would do something about this I’m sure… file unemployment :woman_shrugging:t4:

2 Likes

Call head quarters. Tell them you are going to file a law suit. Well see what they do to manager then

2 Likes

Nah that is assault, and you are justified in quitting. Press charges.

1 Like

Lmao maybe you should learn to stfu and he did NOT lay his hands on you idiot

4 Likes

Theyve already said they have video, call the police and let them watch it, see what they say

1 Like

People saying call cops get she’ll also be looked at for her behavior. Especially if she appeared to be in stance she planned to go after that other person. Most lawyers won’t touch this case due to that fact. They will fight he grabbed you to remove you from that situation to avoid it escalating

9 Likes

So you lost your temper and someone tried to stop the argument and tried to pull you back. You might have kept going and he tried harder. He didn’t hit you. You should have been fired on the spot

17 Likes

Personally I wouldn’t have quit before I got HR involved. Now you can’t really do anything about it because you quit.

2 Likes

Absolutely NOT okay at all. Document everything and see an attorney, report to the police

2 Likes

I would have contacted the authorities. Now the tape may be deleted and you will not have any proof because i would have filed a lawsuit against the company

1 Like

All y’all saying she deserved it, what if it was your mother, sister or daughter?? Nah, y’all would be the 1st ones up there!! SMFH

3 Likes

So you got into a verbal confrontation with another employee and when neither of you backed off when instructed to do so the manager took matters into his own hands to quell the problem and you got mad and quit? I dont see your issue. You both should’ve been fired immediately for causing a disturbance in your place of employment. Let it go sis.

24 Likes

Sounds like ur making this out to be more then it is. He didn’t lay his hands on you. He didn’t beat you up. You were out of control and not listening when you being asked to stop. What was he supposed to do? Let u continue to act a fool while the customers I’m sure could hear? Go ahead and file for unemployment you aren’t going to get it. And the police aren’t going to do anything. Sounds like he grabbed ur arm to remove u from the situation that u created by screaming at another employee.

31 Likes

Call the cops and labour board ASAP! Makena complaint too

You should all be fired honestly.

12 Likes

But call the police and file a report.

I would go higher. I dont care who you are or who is ignoring you, you do NOT put your hands on anyone. If theres an argument, put yourself between the 2 arguing, and make yourself visible.

2 Likes

I would be calling corporate to tell them I am suing the manager for assault. The company for doing nothing about it. You will get action then.

1 Like

If they didn’t do anything and the Big Boss didn’t do anything, they arent worried abt a lawsuit bc I guarantee their lawyer saw a copy of the video.
You can go to the cops but the video is probably gone so your lawyer would havw to get the written records they have.

2 Likes

Just because you another employee were in an arguemsnt doesnt fice another person the right to lay a hand on you

1 Like

Why write this if you’re already sure of your answer? Just want to argue with more people? You should have been fired immediately.

22 Likes

No man has a right to put their hands on a woman no matter what.

4 Likes

Act right and this won’t happen to you! You’re not a child.

24 Likes

Assuming the cook was a guy, he should have pulled him away, not you. If anything he should have gotten another female to pull you away.

3 Likes

Well unfortunately both of you should be fired. I probably would have done the same but knowing good and well what the consequences would be. Neither of you guys where backing off and that’s someones business.

8 Likes

And here she is attacking people on the post for not agreeing with her

18 Likes

You’re wrong. Want to act like an idiot… that’s fine… do it on your time though. Was he suppose to just let you be ignorant at your work place? He was trying to get control of the situation because you were acting reckless. Sorry not sorry. Act like a professional.

17 Likes

I would get a lawyer that’s a huge lawsuit

2 Likes

To be honest no one should be name calling, yelling or swearing in a workplace. Whether you were out of control verbally doesn’t give anyone the right to put their hands on you. All of you should have been fired for work place misconduct and then the manger should’ve been charged with assault. Doesn’t sound like anyone in the situation acted like adults, And NO ONE has the right to lay hands on anyone else.

13 Likes

I would of went off on the cook too you are in a workplace everyone should be nice and him calling the servers a bitch would of made me flip shit! I feel you did the right thing and the big boss shouldn’t of put hands on you I would of quit too

No excuse… although I don’t condone your behavior… he has no right to put his hands on you. Hire an attorney and sue them.

3 Likes

File a report with the police. It is not a slave plantation. You are not owned or property. See an employment attorney for damages. File unemployment for being forced to resign

3 Likes

No one is allowed to put their hands on you. That’s assault. And it’s illegal.

3 Likes

Can we see a pic of these terrible marks? I’m sure u would have taken one… we will wait…

13 Likes

Are you really going to pursue assault charges on a person? Going to try ruining their life cause you threw a fit at work? Grow up.

21 Likes

You need to get an attorney on a percentage basis.against the law to lay hands on you or to goad you into an argument.Does not matter what the company says.

You should have been fired for screaming at someone at work. Not to mention based on the story you weren’t even involved in it you just inserted yourself into it. Should he have grabbed you? No. But in the moment when you’re being hot headed in front of customers I can see how he thought that might be a good idea. Maybe act like a grown up? And then you’ll be treated like a grown up.
Again no right to lay a hand on anyone but you also have no right to behave like that at work.

13 Likes

Was he just grabbing u ti calm u down or thought u was gonna go off or something mabe he didn’t mean to grab so hard , iknow when I’m mad and grab someone or say something or stop a fight from happing I am a little to ruff not meaning too

i’d never think it’s okay for someone to put their hands on me in a negative way, but sounds like you were being a little shit. whatever you do, probably should never put this place on your resume. lmao. RIP to your work experience, hope you weren’t there long. :rofl:

Well he should have fired you and the other employee since you think you can act like a child and fight at work, so I guess it’s a good thing they let you quit instead…

8 Likes

Everyone saying you should be fired are dumb as fuck, the cook started it and you finished it. If anything he should be fired AND that manager needs to lose his job you NEVER put your hand on an employee or anyone without consent that’s the fucked up part, I’m astonished all these people coming at you it’s actually ridiculous and these people have no judgment :joy: obviously if someone’s coming at you you’re going to defend yourself with your words that’s just how life is I’m sick of people who immediatly go oh you should have been fired… now that gets me fired up

This will be my last post my district manager saw on camera my manager in anger grabbing me twice yes I was wrong for arguing but he was not allowed to touch me. It’s all on camera I was just seeking advice from others so thanks for everyone’s input :love_you_gesture:t3:

3 Likes

You were at your place of business. You were wrong. Nobody wants customers to see or hear about unprofessional behaviors. Act right and that won’t happen. File a complaint or talk like an adult during off hours like everyone does is the professional world if you have a problem.

9 Likes

Considering how you were acting, you both should have been fired. Also, because it was in a public place with you yelling and acting a fool, you can be charged with disorderly conduct or breach of peace. Some people are saying get a lawyer, I say you have no case and will lose if you can even find a lawyer that would take such a ridiculous case…but to answer the actual question you asked, yes you were in the wrong.

14 Likes

Everyone who’s saying she’s in the wrong must of never been in an argument with a male before because if a man is calling all kind of bitches to servers then he’s the one who needs to be fucking removed from the situation not her she well in her right to argue and raise her voice cause guess what the cook was posturing and raising his voice as well
And as for her manager that put his hands on her I would have been called the police when the situation occurred so they could have reviewed the tapes

I’m surprised you didn’t get fired to be honest.

5 Likes

Should go labourer board they can advise you on your rights as around what happened at the work place .They can be a great help to People

1 Like

Why are you asking this question??? No common sense :woman_facepalming:

4 Likes

Omg you all sound like out of control teenagers… he shouldn’t have put his hands on you… and you shouldnt have been yelling like a lunatic

5 Likes

Best advice I can give to you

1 Like

Press charges with the police

1 Like

If they feel you have a Case report they can help solve any problems in around it

1 Like

So you threw a temper tantrum at work and now you’re mad? You should probably grow up some and quit arguing with people at work. A manager yelling at you should have been more then enough to stop you but it obviously wasn’t. I’d have probably gripped you up too :woman_shrugging:

19 Likes

So you’re causing a disturbance in someone’s place of business (doesn’t matter if you work there… you’re working for someone else’s company), you aren’t responding to your boss telling you to shut the fuck up and act like a grown ass adult so you’re mad that he grabbed your arm to diffuse the situation?:joy::joy::joy:
Stfu and don’t act like trash then lmao
Also, you weren’t even close to the person you’re having a screaming match with? How embarrassing for your boss to have to watch y’all yelling across the bar. Should’ve fired your ass.

Lol why are you going to ask for advice and argue with everyone who gives you their advice if you don’t like it

11 Likes

No matter what happened in this situation??? A manager is not allow to touch you!! He can talk you down> But no touching!!!

3 Likes

Lori Grant :woman_facepalming:t2::woman_facepalming:t2::woman_facepalming:t2:

1 Like

LMFAO
YOU should’ve minded your own business and stayed out of it
He didn’t “put hands” on you he grabbed your arm to restrain you during your child like outburst
Putting hands on someone means to physically assault someone not restrain them
Now your just fishing for a payday
I’m glad you quit so you don’t qualify for unemployment

12 Likes

File charges and he had no right laying a finger on you

3 Likes

What kind of advice are you looking for??? You quit.
Seek out anger management classes.

11 Likes

100% grow up. Christ.

11 Likes

Wow. So you were yelling(already incredibly unorofessional and immature in the work place or in public in general unless your a toddler who has not yet learned how to control your emotions) and told to stop by your boss, which you didn’t. You continued carrying on until someone had to physically grab you. Sounds like you quit more out of embarrassment than actually being touched…also…a responsible parent doesn’t just quit a job in anger without first attempting mediation or at least finding a new job. Sounds to me like you have a lot of growing up to do. Hopefully you use all your time sitting home unemployed to think about how adults are supposed to act and how to bring value to your place of work as an employee to help move yourself forward. Wish you all the best in your time of reflection.

15 Likes

Yes you were wrong to throw a temper tantrum at work BUT that doesn’t give ANYONE the right to put their hands on you, that is assult. If your manager yelled at you and you did not respond, his next move should have been to step infront of you and tell you to go outside and gather yourself, this is a place of business and you need to act accordingly. Then the manager should have written you both up and went over policies with you, have the two of you come to an agreement per their policies and then put both of you on probation for a period of time. If it is on camera that a person put their hands on you, make a police report, go to a lawyer with it and press charges. Be sure to tell your attorney what happened from the beginning, temper tantrum and all, so that he knows what lead up to the assult. Sounds like you were working in a male dominate place and I assure you that they will NEVER take a female side as they feel intimidated by females. I am sure they are glad that you are no longer their and slandering your name. Chin up and find you a much better job as you don’t need a job like this.

5 Likes

If the cook wasn’t talking to you, you should have stayed out of it. Your manager tried to diffuse the situation by verbally telling you to stop and to calm down or whatever. You said yourself that you ignored him. You were yelling and showing your ass in front of his guests. Had you stopped when you were told to, you wouldn’t be in this situation. Don’t be surprised when you go to court that the case is dismissed. You have no evidence. The video isn’t going to cut it. There’s no way to tell how hard he grabbed you. If he left bruises and you photographed them, then maybe. But going by your story alone I don’t think you have much of a case. You shouldn’t have popped off on the cook if it didn’t involve you

Actually. It depends on what you sign when you start your place of employment. A lot of people don’t read them, but working with the public, some state by any means necessary to provide a safe work environment for others. :woman_shrugging:

Next time, the boss should call the cops and have them arrested for disorderly conduct and call it a day and instead of writing them up, fire their asses! Customers do not want to hear that nonsense. Actions have consequences and a lot of times people don’t want to be judged, but people judge by your actions. So, don’t get mad at the customers when they’re looking at you, as if you’re the 2 year old throwing the temper tantrum on the floor, with dirty looks! JS

I sometimes think ppl put stupid stuff on here just to have someone to argue with… :woman_shrugging::woman_shrugging::woman_shrugging:

8 Likes

All of you saying “get an attorney” should smack yourself in the face! He didn’t beat her he removed her from the situation. Stop trying to sue everyone for everything!! You are the reason insurance premiums for small businesses are through the roof!! Get a grip. We don’t even know the whole story and you are trying to tell someone to sue. :woman_facepalming:t3::woman_facepalming:t3::woman_facepalming:t3::woman_facepalming:t3:

16 Likes

Reading these responses and SMH! A few actually sound like mature responses but the rest of you need to grow up. Reading them just shows why our country is going to hell. People cant take responsibility for thier own actions. Actions determine response… People need to grow up!!!

6 Likes

It may be unprofessional but he’s not allowed to touch you unless he was restraining you from attacking him . So press them charges :woman_shrugging:t4:

6 Likes

Brittney Cain bruh look at this !! People are saying I deserved to be man handled by Lee :sob:

If you’ve ever worked in a restaurant setting you’d know people yell at each other all the time. It’s a thing. Kitchens are very high stress and high pace. Cooks can be serious assholes even if you’re the nicest you can be. I’ve been yelled at for asking for something nicely just because they were busy and grumpy that I asked for something THEY missed. It’s not unheard of that arguments break out in the kitchen pretty much every single day.
So I’m not surprised that this happened. But I am definitely surprised that the manager grabbed you. I mean any unwanted touch is assault. Especially in the workplace. I mean unless you’re physically fighting someone and the manager is trying to break it up, he shouldn’t touch you at all.

Lawyer in your state.

1 Like

Lesson: 1. Go to work
2. Do your job
3. Keep ur mouth
Shut
4. Go home

15 Likes

Boy there are some REAL assholes in this group!

Wow :unamused: there’s a lot going on . As an adult you need to learn how to control your temper . However he’s not supposed to be physical with you . He could have stepped away and called the police to deal with it … what would you have wanted the police arresting you for disorderly conduct or your manager pulling you ?

2 Likes