I said something I regret to my girlfriend: How can I fix it?

So I need help. I honestly made a mistake. My girlfriend and I have kids together. We both work and help each other taking care of these kids. My girlfriend works to go to school and take care of the house and all of us. Well, we got into a fight because she was doing something, and I was asking for her attention and joining us in watching a movie. She said she’d be a few, but she needs to finish homework and a few house things. Well, by the time she finished, the kids were asleep, and I got mad. I yelled at her and told her that she should have dropped everything to spend time with the kids and done the homework earlier. Well, right now, she locked herself in the other bedroom, and I heard her crying. I feel like crap because it hit me on that she deals with everything and never gets a min to herself. How can I fix this because she’s crying her eyes out and it’s bad enough she doesn’t get enough rest, and I’m worried.

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Admit to her face to face that you were an asshole who didnt think before he talked :woman_shrugging:

Tell her you now realize the extent of what you said and sincerely apologize and hug her and appreciate her.

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Apologize and give her a hug, hugs always help

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Apologize to her, tell her you appreciate everything she does for y’all’s home and kids and that you’re proud of her for getting her stuff done. Then maybe surprise her and take her for a pedicure or bring her breakfast in bed or something nice she’d like to show her your appreciation

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Tell her exactly what you wrote :slight_smile:

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Give that women a hug and make the kids and her breakfast. You have acknowledged you’re faults time to be the bigger person.

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Talk to her and apologize. Let her sleep in and let her go out and do whatever she wants. Make sure she understands that you didn’t mean what you said and make her know that everything she does is appreciated

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Tell her you were wrong!! Apologize, and explain!!!

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Do the house work? Can’t you do the stuff also? She needs a break from everything.

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Honestly the fact that you took it to write this in here just to ask for help and what you can do shows that you really care for her. Go buy her favorite snack or drink and maybe some flowers. But don’t let her go to sleep before you apologize. Never go to sleep being mad at one another always make amends before.

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some things just seem self-evident . . . pick up the slack more around the house. Do more so she can rest. Take your own advice - you said she should have done homework earlier, perhaps you can get up earlier to do some of the housework she’s been doing.
I see no mystery . . .

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Get her a cheap bouquet of flowers and apologize and tell her to go take a hot bath and relax. She probably already feels like she doesn’t do enough or spend enough time with the kiddos. Explain that you were wrong and your super sorry.

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Actually telling her anything sounds like a lame approach. How about you roll up your sleeves and do some of the housework so she can get a break and focus on her schooling. You sound like a sweetheart and she’s lucky you care but feelings get hurt and it takes changed behavior to heal them. At least for me it does. Good luck!

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And remind her how proud you are of her for being so dedicated to her education. It requires some sacrifices now but in the end finishing school provides a better opportunity for the whole family. Let her know you understand it’s not easy and you want to support her.

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Sincerely apologize. Let her know you value her contributions to the kids, your home and your life. Lots and lots of hugs. Make it a point once or twice a month to cook dinner for her or send her off to get a mani/pedi. If money is an issue, watch some YouTube videos on home pedicures and offer to give her one.

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Ok well you have stuffed up and been really insensitive but you are man enough to acknowledge it. Write her a love note and tell her how wonderful she is, how she is amazing and what an insensitive moron you were and you’re so sorry. If u can afford it, go get her a voucher to go get her hair done and tell her you’ll mind the kids whilst she has some me time.

Apologize and give her as day to herself !

Apologize and do the house work for her.

Go to that door and beg for forgiveness but if you say sorry than you better not do it again because that’s what an apology means

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Speaking from experience from basically the same situation, could you have possibly helped with the housework that needed done while she did her homework and then everyone sat down to watch the movie? What you said was very sweet and she’s lucky that you feel that way but Im always left feeling (when I miss movie night with the family) that if we would all have worked for 30 minutes to get the stuff done that I could have joined in instead of missing it bc it took me two hours alone.

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Say exactly what you just put on here. Say you messed up and your sorry you didn’t realize at the time how much she actually does. And then from now on offer to help out do a few house chores that she does every day so she can focus on her homework and then you can both spend plenty of time with the kids.

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Talk to her. Tell her your sorry. You realized you were wrong. Offer her some free time to just take care of herself worry free without the kids.

I’m a mom of 3, & by the end of the day I’m so touched out and just tired of every human in the house needing my attention. Let her cry it out for a bit she has been bottling up her stress and she needs to let it out, but if you can go in the room give her a hug and let her know you appreciate all the hard work she puts in because it’s all for you guys. & most importantly, give her a break. Make dinner, wash the dishes, let her go out and get groceries by herself. Alone time as a mom really helps you feel like an individual again and then you can go back to lovin on your husband/kids. :heart:

Give her a day were You keep the kids and let her have some time to herself and tell her you are really sorry that u said what you did

Omg this is the sweetest post I’ve seen yet! Just apologize and tell her that you didn’t understand just how much she really does do for you all

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Pick up the house. Do the dishes and the laundry. Go rub her feet and tell her you’re sorry you yelled at her. Then give her a big kiss and take her to bed. :eggplant:

Tell her you were being an idiot and you’re sorry. Ask her what you can do to clean it up …

As my husband always says, “Sorry” is JUST words…so don’t just apologize…but PROVE you are sorry. Help with housework, run her a hot bath, tell her she’s beautiful and you appreciate all she does …

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I would apologize, and tell her you appreciate everything she does. Maybe just explain that you want the family time, and you understand it’s hard to have that at times. Try to pick up extra slack, and maybe you guys can talk and plan a night every week for family time? Like look at your schedules the beginning of the week and choose a day that fits for you both and plan a night where you and the kids and your girlfriend can sit and watch a movie or something as a family.

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Help her more…and go out for a nice meal…even if you take the kids. Show her you appreciate her.

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If I came home to a laundry going, most of the dishes done and a path through the house and the pets have been taken caare of… dang… I would be in heaven. Make a list of all chores every day
and you can both scratch it off the list. Happy Spouse, Happy House.

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Sincerely apologize and do something for her. Maybe If you can give her a day off from the kids and house and let her have a HER day.

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Get flower,chocolate for her lol.

Run a bath put some bath salts in it give her some wine and say go sit in a nice bath relax l wl finish up the house take your time and let her know how you appreciate all she does for you and the children

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Apologise… tell her to get ready and call a girlfriend. Tell her to go out and have fun. Let her have some “me time”. Being a mother, girlfriend, student and having a full time job… You lose yourself… or better yet, take her out on a date. Just you two!! Date night really does make all the difference. Nothing fancy, bet she wouldn’t care wtf yaw do, just that your spending alone time together. I am very proud of her and YOU! Keep your head up man. And maybe next time, pause the movie and you n the kids bust out the house work so she CAN spend time with yaw.

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You could clean the house, make dinner, do the dishes, bathe the kids. Then give her time to take a hot bath with a glass of wine. Or whatever she likes.

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While she’s doing her homework, start doing the house stuff she needed to do. She would have gotten done a lot faster.

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You could have helped her with the house :roll_eyes: Tf. Make it better by doing her chores today and buy that poor woman some flowers.

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Go and apologize. That’s really all u can do. Order her a meal eat together as a family then u take care of everything so she can get her school work done. She needs to feel supported in her school work. She needs to feel appreciated.

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Tell her what you just told us & hold her for just a minute. Let her rest on you for a minute. It will refresh her mind,body & soul

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I mean at least you’re acknowledging that you didn’t react in the best way. Her education is probably very important to her and she needs your support. Its not going to kill you to help around the house either.

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I think everything you said here should be said to her! Let her know you recognize everything she does and that you are truly remorseful for saying what you did.

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Moms need that time. If she was busy you can’t be mad. Seems like you already know she does alot. She just needs you be be understanding. I am sure she wanted to watch the movie. But shit needed to get done. That was the only time she could do it. Just love her. So you don’t lose her.

how ld are the kids, maybe they and you can help take some of the pressure off her shoulders, by helping to clean, and even cook at times.

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Apologize and truly mean it. Send her to get a mani/pedi, while she’s gone clean the house and you and the kids have dinner ready when she gets home. Rent a movie get a bunch of snacks make a blanket fort and have family movie night.

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Tell her what you just told us. The fact you recognize your mistake shows how much you care. We all say things we dont mean, it’s how you handle the aftermath that counts.

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Just tell her you are sorry, and tell her what you just told us. Itll be more appreciated then whatever you buy. Really. :heart:

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Say exactly what you just said in this post … with flowers … and chocolates … and 1000 I’m sorry’s. Being a mom and student is hard enough but nearly impossible for people with no support

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Say just that. You’re sorry. Try to be better in the future. I work 40hrs/week and go to school full time and I am a total stressed out bitch during the school year. Sometimes I just need a good cry and a hug/apology from my husband. It’s okay to make mistakes if you can own up to them.

Go talk to her and tell her what you just said on here

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She needs to feel appreciated. She needs to know that she can depend on you for anything & everything. Yes, that’s a lot…but you got this. Both of you together got this!! Apologize to her, & MEAN IT!! Make her know you mean it & that you understand she has a lot on her plate. Help her with the household chores while she’s doing homework then it’ll all be done & y’all can spend time together as a family! Oh yeah, & buy her some flowers!! Good luck!!

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Omg, for one that is really sweet, not so much the argument but the fact that you recognize you had made a mistake in saying that statement and realize that’s she’s doing the best she can for her family. I would just apologize to her and tell her that I do realize and understand and appreciate everything you do for this family.

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Give her make up sex :laughing:

Slip and apology/love letter under the door and wait for her to come out.

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Sorry only means anything if actions go along with it. I can be apologized to repeatedly but unless your actions match your words. I wont accept it. I know that sounds harsh but I’m a firm believer in actions speaking louder than words. We are all human and mess up and try to apologize for our wrong doings. I think people really need to see you’re sorry versus just hearing it. Lift some of the weight from the everyday routine off her shoulders so she doesnt feel like she has to do everything. With everything she does and then has to hear you upset with her for doing what she needs to do probably pushed her to limits for the day which is why she was crying. Let her get a good cry in, sometimes it’s what us women need to do if we have no other way to blow off some steam and by the sounds of it she doesnt have time to blow off any steam at all. Good luck.

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In the future, divide and conquer. Tell her if she stops now to watch the movie with the family (since it’s a time issue with the kids needing to go to bed), that you’ll do the housework that needs to be done while she does her homework…and follow through. Do a good job when you do the chores, don’t halfway do it so that she still has to come behind you and finish something.

Acknowledge that you were being selfish and you should have offered to help her so that she had the time to watch the movie. Then, talk about how you guys can split up responsibilities so that she van can enjoy family time with you more in the future and still get her homework done. If you see ways she could improve her time management while still allowing her some down time, bring it up while you’re discussing division of chores. Don’t bring it up while you’re apologizing!

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No man cares like this. I don’t believe this post. Haha.

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Sounds like what I’m going through but my husband believes moms dont get time

Bye her some flowers, take her out, lighten her load, pamper her and apologize. It’s awesome you recognize that you were in the wrong. Actions always speak louder than words😊 good luck.

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I would start off by apologizing to her… Telling her your sorry, and that you realize she does everything under the sun, but that you want to try to figure out a way so that you all can visit as a family together and have more family time together. It is really important for us to set aside all the school stuff, work stuff and all that for a moment and appreciate your loved ones. you also need to show her your sorry and show that you appreciate each other…

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This is creepy! This is exact thing happened to me tonight, but I don’t cry I haven’t cried in a long time. Once the kids were out to bed I came back down stairs to watch tv and we are talking now.

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Awww do the house work or take her for a treat day to apologise xx

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Changed behavior is always a good start! :wink:

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Help eliminate some of the things she have to do around the house, later run her a hot long bubble bath and when she’s done with her bath get some body oil and give her a full body massage while you rub her down with it and talk to her so she can ease her mind.

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She’s under a lot of stress. You’ll need to sacrifice a virgin to the Gods above to get her to forgive you. You know, nothing too crazy!

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Saying you are sorry is a start. Saying you made a mistake is a start

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You should feel bad. She’s holding every ball in the air and you kicked her down. Flowers aren’t going to fix this, HELPING with life, in everyway, can fix this.

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First of all be honest. Tell her you love her, not with flowery words but the kind of gut feelings you have for her. Then tell her you made a mistake, and are truly sorry. Do something for her that she never does for herself. Acknowledge all the sacrifices she makes for you and the kids, as well as the multiple layers she has to deal with from working at home, raising a family not to mention going to school.

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Tell her your sorry & u understand, I know u got to get your homework done. Please forgive me. Good luck

Wow at least u fkn notice what u did wrong there… my bf could care the hell less

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Say sorry, and say what you sorry for. An apology follow by understanding what you did wrong, would mean so much more than a simple “I’m sorry, I won’t do it again” if you want to do something little extra special…buy her favorite bottle of wine if she drinks, or her favorite flowers, candy, a little extra touch. Most important is saying sorry and why you are sorry.

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Action speaks louder than words

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Apologize, tell her what you just told us, and ask her how you can better help her. It’s very simple.

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Simply give her a minute! When she comes out tell her sorry, and that you really do appreciate all she does. Tomorrow is a new day try and help lighten her load tomorrow, and everyday

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Sometimes, the most obvious, and or ,the hardest, is to offer to help right now. Then play with kids, and the she will have more alone time later to do homework.

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My fiance used to do this while i was in school. We have 3 girls. Surprise her with flowers and her fav candy, a card, write a letter and read it to her. She’ll appreciate it.

Ah you guilt tripped her. That’s a toughie… cause now you feel guilty, right? For future reference, it’s not cool to use kids to make a mom feel bad for being busy. Dude… never again. Next time, make sure those things are already done, so she doesnt feel the need to do them… have a heart to heart, some big apologies. It may take a little time because, tbh, words really hurt and they’re not easily forgotten. Give her a hug for me, cause I’ve been there… best wishes!!

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Help her out with some things instead of watching tv?

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  1. you should feel like crap that was really selfish and mean of you, but I admire you for looking for advice on your mistake. Now whether you will actually take advice or make excuses remains to be seen.

  2. saying sorry is sometimes not enough, show her you appreciate her and that you know how hard she works. ACTIONS… she needs ACTIONS AND SUPPORT. Take some of her work load without being asked. Don’t say, “you should take a break”,
    make it happen by getting up off your ass and doing the housework she still has to do. It’s really not that hard to figure out. :woman_facepalming:t3: She has her hand full with work, school, kids, house… YOU can only help with the kids and house, so do that! Don’t ask her what you can do, figure out like a partner and parent and just do it. And don’t expect any trophy for doing what you should of been doing all along. ACTIONS!

Learn that you can NEVER take back something you say!

Pick your ass up…and start working so she don’t have to work so hard and give her long hugs and just be empathetic toward her …massages work. Whether it be back orfeet… sing prayerful hymms from church and go youlle then begin to understand her side …don’t just say it…live it I have COPD. I run my home I need attention from time to time but being a bead worker I have to be alone I have to concentrate… trying times for me is sleep with worry… your life is hard but you got this. Be patient life wasn’t created in one night…

Go clean up the house and do what she does. Write a note, expressing your feelings and give that woman a hug.

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Treat her to spa day.lol make dinner for the family. A mother is never done with house work. You tell her it can wait but honestly it has to be done right then to her. Offer help ask her what she would like for you to do.

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Give her time to herself, help out with chores so she can have time to finish her homework & spend time with the family.

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You acknowledged you messed up, which is great. Understand this though, what you said is nothing she doesn’t feel already. As a working mom the pressure to give 100% to your children, give 100% to your SO, give 100% to the house, and give 100% to school and work is very real and unrealistic. You want her to be more available more pick up the slack, help with the stuff she does, help her study. It’s a terrible feeling to not be able to enjoy every moment with your kids, but it’s also a terrible feeling to not get a good grade, or miss work, or have the laundry pile up because there is pressure for all of it. Take the pressure off. She’s only human.

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Make sure you give her time. Thats prob the biggest. Let her know how sorry you are but let her work through it and digest it. Don’t expect your apology to fix it immediately

Say you’re sorry and do something nice for her. Don’t beat yourself up you made a mistake. We are all only Human. Good luck.

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Apologize and get her flowers if she likes them or take her out for romantic lunch dinner

just apologize and tell her you wanted to spend some time with her. Make sure she knows you value what she does

clean the whole entire house for her today, cook, do the laundry and put it away, feed d kids, clean the yard, and put d kids to bed, then help her w her homework!..um…lets see…what else…oh yea if u have time n strength left to shower n to watch a movie do so n invite her to watch it w you again, but before that go to d store n buy her a card, balloon, or something that has a picture of an ass (donkey) on it and then stick a picture of urself in place of its face, along w her favorite flowers, i swear u wont need any words after that! she’ll get it! :grin:

Get up and help her so she can sit down with the kids, you should see that without being told, dumb butt.

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I am so glad you acknowledge your wrong. Many men don’t. Show her this message where you ask for help in fixing the problem. Apologize and God bless.

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It takes time. My guy is great at doing the same thing lol. Apparently your girl is nicer than I am :joy:. Apologize, expect her to be upset. Help her where she needs it so you guys can do family nights. Parenting, work, and school are all stressful. You’re all going to loseyour patienve sometimes. It’s hard to fix when you do. I know very few women who don’t like chocolate or flowers and even fewer that appreciate reminders of why they are awesome…JS :blush:

If I were you I would start out apologizing and admitting you were insensitive try to schedule time for the two of you and time for the two of you to spend with the kids kind of plan ahead dates and ask her if there are things you can do to help a good man is never afraid to ask what do you need me to do to help you and a good woman is the same way

Pick some of the slack up around the house like laundry. Get a babysitter one night and surprise her with dinner whether it’s take out or at a sit down restaurant. Show her you appreciate ALL of her efforts. Sounds like she has ton on her plate.

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Tell her exactly what you wrote here. And next time ask her what you can do to help so you can enjoy time together.

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I am also a full time student and a stay at home mom. Give her a break and literally let her do nothing or anything she wants. Let her leave the house or take your kids out of the house if she wants to stay and give her the freedom to be an individual again. It’s the best break I get and my husband is amazing for doing it.

That’s brought tears to my eyes I honestly think u should apologise and do a little more to help her let her, even show her this

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She will need a moment. Her feelings were hurt. Do not ignore her pain. First and foremost, apologize for what you said and what u did. Apologize for how you said it, and for how u made her feel. Tell her that you recognize how much she does, and how much you appreciate her. Tell her how sorry you are. Clean the house, make the dinner, buy her some flowers…and not just so she forgives you, but to help her since she does so much (as u said she does everything including being in school).It happens. Couples fight and sometimes things are said out of frustration, but it’s good that you recognize that you did wrong, and now you need to let HER know how wrong you were and show her through actions that your there for her, as a partner, as a friend, and a lover. (And I dont mean sex lol).
This is just a little bump, just correct it before it becomes a hill.

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