I recently got a cps case against me, and I wasn’t home when they did their first surprise visit; they stuck a card in my door, and I called to let them know I had received their card. The woman gave me an appointment time, so I figured it must’ve not been too serious considering they usually do surprise visits. I called my mom to tell her that somebody called cps on me; she starts to tell me who she thinks called and starts telling me what all might have been saying. The next day the social workers come and tell me everything, and they see that the information was false, and they closed the case. Everything my mom told me that might get brought up got brought up, so of course, I realized who it was that called cps, and when I called to let her know that she was right, she starts to defend my younger sibling, who is the one she accused of making the call. She tells me that she doesn’t think they could do that when 3-4 years ago, that same sibling called cps on her twice with false accusations. I found it odd that the day before, she was accusing them of calling but after the case was closed tells me she doesn’t believe they are capable of doing it, but everything she mentioned was in the report, and I feel she might have been the one to call cps on me. Now since she claims I accused my younger sibling, she doesn’t want to talk to me and actually hung up on me crying and yelling and blaming me for stressing her out over the situation. How can I handle the situation with my mom? I feel deep down that she’s the one who made the call but tried to make it seem like my younger sibling did it instead, and when things didn’t go how she wanted, she got angry at me and defended my sibling after accusing them. My mom is manipulative and a narcissist and now hadn’t spoken to me since Thursday, when before we spoke every day. What would yall do in this situation? Should I cut family off and go on with my life? Should I reach out to my mom? Please be kind; I had cut my mom off before and just let her back in my life eight months ago, so I’m trying to keep from having to do it again. Thank you!
Well its one thing to just be an ugly manipulative person but calling cps on you when there’s nothing wrong. That’s the problem. Possibly getting your kids taken away? You have to draw the line somewhere. What she did was insane. Plus you know you’ll never get the truth out of her with how she’s acting. Good luck, my mom is also the same way but she’s never stooped that low. Sorry for what you’re going through.
Nope. That’s manipulation and cruelty! Cut her out ! What if she does this again and they keep the case open? You’re on their radar now.
You dont deserve that stress. Toxic is toxic and she is definitely that plus.
It’s hard I know, I did it. But those types of people, even family, will try and destroy you. And your children should not be exposed to them. You need to protect yourself and your family. Get her out of your life!!!
My mother was just like her and it wa hard but I couldn’t deal with her.
At the end of the day toxic is toxic. I have experienced similar things with my mother as well and was raised to believe that blood is blood no matter what the other does. With that being said it’s okay to cut off family if they’re toxic. it’s a toxic environment for you as well as your little one and thats additional stress you don’t need ultimately the decision is yours but speaking from experience I would cut ties.
Help a mama out and respond anonymously on our forum. I think my mom called CPS on me: What should I do?
You answered your own question- your mom is a manipulative narcissist- cut the mold off and keep on keeping on- there’s no valid reason to keep her in your life
Maybe your mom is the one who called. Either way I’d cut them outta my life. Eff that
Cut ties for a minute reevaluate. Id they are willing to put your kids at risk to go through such a horrible endeavor they are not worth your time.
That will be the end, no ifs and buts.
No need for this unnecessary drama, leave it how it is now.
Have you had a chance to ask your sibling? I would definitely have my guard up with mom if she is the way your saying. And eventually cut her off. It sucks, but if you had to do it before you know what you have to do.
It’s time to cut her off for good.
Cut it off before it becomes even worse. Idc how they are related to you, you are in no way shape or form obligated to continue to put up with abusive behaviors.
Anyone who puts my kids at risk are absolutely out of my life and that is putting it mildly. My kids are my life. They come before anything and anyone. Period. No exception.
Yep cut your mom out for sure. Thats manipulation and psychotic.
My mother in law called cps on my husband and myself they came out found nothing wrong. They closed the case that day found out it was my husband’s mother we cut her off for three years. She apologized for what she did and we have moved on.
U cut her off once before…I’m sure the reason was logical…now she goes and does some shady stuff like this…i would definitely cut ties…yr babies need u and if she files a false claim and they get taken away…then what?.. nah. I wouldn’t even answer if she called. She has guilty all over her…why surround yrself with people that stand in yr way of success
You let her back in and look what she did.
When someone shows you who they are believe them.
She used your sibling to make it seem as if your accusing everyone.sounds like she really planned that out.your children dont need that
Sounds like you caught the mouse. Don’t let the mouse back in the house, just cut her off.
Boundaries! Be the loving caring person you are. If she calls be polite. If she doesn’t, let it be. She probably has guilt remorse and is acting like a caught child. Let it go. If it’s meant to change, it will. Good luck
My sister in law called on us 2 times. The 1st time we cut her out for about a year but then we slowly allowed her back around things were okay then she did it again and cps almost took our girls. We cut everyone out of our life because they defended her and we moved 1300 miles away to be with my family. Cutting them out is okay to do especially when they threaten yours kids.
Bin her off. It’s a real bitter pill to swallow but she is no good for you:cry: who does that! you look after you and your children
For the moment distance yourself and save your peace of mind
Nah girl. That’s some straight sociopathic crap. You’re better off without that kinda toxicity in you or your child’s life.
Talk to your sibling, ditch your mother.
Don’t announce your done. Just let it be and don’t call her and don’t answer her calls. AND…I would not let your children go with her anywhere anymore. You don’t know what she is telling your children. Just because she is your Mom doesn’t mean you have to put up with such disrespect and unkindness
I have personally went through this with family… Please get them out of your life before it’s too late. Join some Anti CPS groups you’ll see what they are capable of. Anyone trying to bring these types of people into your life don’t have you or your kids best interest at heart. Someone who was genuinely concerned would have came to you first.
I had family members call cps on me 19 times thru the course of raising all 3 of my kids. I passed all home inspections and drug test. Some family members are just toxic
I would cut her off. I can’t do toxic. She messed with YOUR family. Anyone can get it behind mine and don’t CARE if they’re blood or not. Toxic is toxic .
I would cut mom out and if you truly believe it was just your mom that did this and that your sibling had zero knowledge of this then maybe try to reach out to the sibling but I would 100% for sure cut mom off completely and not give her any more chances obviously she’s toxic if you just started talking to her 8 months ago and she does this, I wouldn’t even let that toxicity around my child/children!!!
BYE MOM! Never look back…blood doesn’t always make you family. Trust me! Family is who is there for you day after day. Family is who loves you & your kids like their own. Family backs you up not tears you down.
I don’t know what state you are in but you can get a copy of the investigation . DCFS has a website ; type DCFS forms and look at each one ; in Texas it’s a 4885g . Send a copy of your drivers Liscense and the form to the address in the bottom of the form
Id never speak to her again
I don’t deal with anyone who calls or threatens to call cps on me. You are automatically out of our lives if you do that. Its not tolerated.
I’m dealing with CPS due to my mom calling them. I have cut her out of our lives and will not be changing that decision
You don’t have to let her in your life. You are an adult now and can choose your peace over any relationship. Even your mother.
I feel like mother in laws or moms.dads or stepdad hate if young people do better then them and try to ruin them with there kids.so low
You shouldn’t care who called. If you were cleared. Let it go.
Girl… Cut it off if you can. My husband’s baby mama is constantly calling CPS on us and every single time, it has been proven to be false. I wish so bad that I could cut her off, but that’s not possible.
Sounds like she’s guilty if she’s not reaching out
Blood doesn’t always have to be family!
Do people not understand how false claims can possibly turn into so much more… and ruin your life?? I am so happy they closed it quickly. I hope you distance from your mom. That is not something to be made lightly. It’s sickening she would do that.
My exes family used to call cps on us all the time like to the point that after so many times cps told them they were going to file charges for false claims…if I were I would totally cut ties with your mother. She sounds very disrespectful and toxic and yall don’t need that especially if you only let back in your life 8 months ago and this is what’s coming from it. Family can sometimes be the most toxic
You can file harassment charges through cps if they continue to call with false allegations. I’ve had to do this with my family. There is no right answer unfortunately, but in my opinion, if you had to cut her off before due to her behavior then it may be best for everyone involved to do it again and live your lives.
Move on without your mom. Just because you gave birth, doesn’t make you a good person
I lost custody of my children because of my mom only for my mom to turn around 2 years after taking them from me and making it to where I couldn’t get them back and giving two of my kids away for other people to raise and those other people have verbally and physically abused my children and there’s nothing I can do about it so yeah I would cut your mom out of your life
Cps false claims is still a smack in the face
Toxic and crazy to be calling CPS . Cut them off
Block her on Everything, and never speak to her again. That’s ridiculous.
If she has done this to you before, and now doing it again then if you continue letting her in yours and your kids life, she will do it again! It’s a pattern and she probably isn’t going to change. I’d say bye. That is not acceptable! If anyone ever done that to me, I would never allow them around me or my kids again! I hope you figure out your situation. Prayers for you:pray:t3:
I’ve cut my mother out for less. Get that bs out of your life.
Move on your kids are more important than your mom I know that sounds mean it it’s true
Cps absolutely isnt the way to go, unless your children are in immediate danger, being abused, or neglected. It’s a shame people think they know better than the parents and call cps for a stupid reason. I would never trust the state with my kids, I would absolutely drop someone in a heartbeat if they called or threatened cps. More people get abused in the system than out of the system. There is a female who was in the system, they locked her in a closet and fed her scraps of food, and abused the shit out of her. Do everything in your power to keep your ducks in a row if they are called again, it sounds like something your mother would do.
Toxic is toxic family or not, cut anyone toxic out of your life XOXO
Id cut her off, immediately. Toxic is toxic & it doesn’t matter who it is. The case was already closed & proven to be false information, so you know you’re dpong something right. I wouldn’t allow that around myself or my kids.
I’m sorry. Mom needs to go!
If you KNOW that your mom is a narcissist then please take my word and go NO CONTACT. You can’t and won’t win with a narc. They will make your lives miserable and will keep trying until they succeed.
Please take my word. I know first hand. My mom is one too.
Move on ! Family don’t do that !
If it was just your mom who called and you only suspect her then I would recommend to cut her out of your life. If your siblings didn’t have anything to do with it and you don’t suspect them then keep them in your life.
Im so sorry. My heart hurts for you. Some bridges burned…should never be rebuilt. Feel me?
Especially when your own children are at stake. Burn that bridge for their best interest.
Ask your younger sibling about it and say how your moms the one who said it. Since the case was closed cps is suppose to tell you who called so you might can give them a call and see who it was. Your mom sounds toxic. If definitely cut that relationship off
If you believe she is who did called for bogus reasons, I would personally cut her off. Also 60-90 days after the case is closed you can go to the CPS office and file paperwork to get a copy of the report/case file and it will tell you who called if they gave their name and what number they called from. Just so you know!
It sounds like she will never change and is toxic . Go with your gut on this one .
This happened me. I had been saying for 2 years I just wasn’t well, pain in my head was horrific and I So ill. I send a group chat to my mum, and 2 sisters. I purposely didn’t include the eldest sister as she just causes problems with everyone. I had seizures etc. My eldest sister called CPS on me. Said I was addicted to pain killers. I had no energy at all. I was constantly that ill I couldn’t stand up without looking like I was drunk. I haven’t drank alcohol in years. I had been back and forth to my doctor tho. My eldest daughter reported that I was addicted to prescription drugs. That I was mentally unwell from one seizure. My own mother agreed. I went through hell. Case worker contacted my doctor. Thankfully I had been back and forth to doctor so had records. To prove I actually was unwell. That my mental health was okay. And Just need to wait for neurologist. Well neurologist cleared me for epilepsy. But caught on my blood pressure was extremely dangerously low. It’s now been diagnosed I actually have a heart condition at 32. On steroids daily. I told my mother than my sisters should be ashamed of themselves. They now because it is a heart condition are concerned about my health. I refuse point blank to speak to my eldest sister. And will never never never forgive some of my family members for what they put me through.
Honestly u need to cut her out of your life. You do not need that at all. The kids do not need that. U need to focus on you and your children anyone who wants to try to ruin that doesn’t need to be in your life.
Have NO further contact with her for ANY reason, no matter what & DENY her access to your children. You deserve better in your life & in your children’s lives.
Toxic is toxic. Family or not. You do not deserve that. She wouldn’t be apart of mind and my kids lives after that bullshit. I’d tell her to take a long walk off a short bridge.
She sounds like a narcissist mother if she called, blamed someone else, and refuses to talk about it now that you call her out…
Cut her outta your life honestly. Here’s the thing with narcissists they are only out for themselves and since the case got closed now she can’t look like the hero trying to comfort you which was her agenda if it was her. Cut her outta your life completely and tell her why and that she needs to come clean abt it (she won’t tho) and call your younger sibling and ask them if they made the call or if it was your mother and if your sibling gets upset etc then maybe cut them off too
Unfortunately i woukd have to say ignore her bc u dont need that in your or your childrens life
You need to get her out of your life for your own mental health and for the safety of your children
Cut her off, move on.
Unfortunately you have to cut her off again if its not worth the stress. It sounds like your mom may have some issues she needs to work on. Ill pray for tour strength to do this
With a mother like that, who needs enemies?
Cut her out. I had to do that with my mom. It hurts, but it’s worth it. Your children don’t need that toxicity in their lives, neither do you.
I’d cut her off and get on with your life. She will probably call cps on you again if she’s done it once. And to be honest you can get some nasty social workers who want to make your life a living hell so next time they may find something out of nothing. Iv seen it happen. I had my own mother call them on me when I had my 1st baby. She told them I wasn’t feeding him but little did she know, when she called them I was still in hospital with him. She called them when he was 2 days old and I was in hospital with him after birth for 5 days and he was even tube fed by the hospital until we were released. My family are toxic and I cut them off 7 years ago. I got back intouch with them 2 years ago but that was the biggest mistake of my life because they just tried to make my life miserable all over again. Your better off with your own little family.
A good group for this would be The Sisterhood: Daughters of Narcissistic and Abusive Mothers
It may be able to help as it’s a lot of women who share the same kinda of circumstances as this poster
Cut ties with toxic family members.
Case was closed, cut her off, that’s bullshit. Who does that to their own!? She can’t be trusted.
I dealt with this. sadly those family members are no longer family to me.
Id cut ties. I have zero tolerance for bs or anyone who intentionally fucks with my kids. There isn’t negotiation when it comes to my babies.
Going thru the same stay strong
A friend’s mom done this exact same thing too her, but didn’t accuse someone else. Her mom wanted custody of her middle daughter and when it didn’t with in her favor she called CPS. Cut your mom out off your life if she’s going to be a toxic in your and your kids life. This happened over 2 years ago and they still do not speak. She tried but her mom is dead set for her to fail. She even had her grandmother believing my friend hated her, until they finally spoke. Toxic is toxic no matter where or who it came from.
It’s simple. Cut her off and forget about her. Easier said than done, I realize. But that’s the answer.
If my mother ever called CPS on me, I would be throwing hands. Especially if it wasn’t needed, and if she doesn’t even have the courage to admit she did and tries to blame on someone else. What even was the point she was hoping to achieve if she’s the one that called? Does she want custody of your kids or something? I’d be cutting ties, especially since you said you’ve done it before and she’s proven herself time and time that it isn’t worth the trouble.
Cut her off. Toxic is toxic, period. You deserve better.
I had a so called friend call as well my exes girlfriend make a stupid report to CPS. The night the showed up I called my friend and she said why would do that etc. Her remark was make sure your house is clean when they show up. So I knew it was her. My exes Girlfriends mom works for another social service agency and she also put a call in to her mom. Was a complete waste of time. Both of admittedly denied it. My ex says he didn’t know anything about it. My daughter just recently told me it was my friend and exes girlfriend that called. And it was all over having my friends daughter and her friend over and because I yelled at them over a mess they made. I didn’t talk to my friend for years. We talk now. But the relationship isnt the same. I have to watch what I say. And I also have screenshots from the conversation that went on between the both of them. My ex still denies him ever knowing. Which Honestly I believe him because his Girlfriend is just a B**** like that and is jealous of my daughter.
Cut her off. Move away and move on.
Don’t cut ya mom out!! Ya only get 1!! At the same token tho!! There is a thing called LOVING 1 FOR A DISTANCE!!! TAKE EVERYTHING SHE SAY WITH A GRAIN OF SALT!! CPS AINT NO JOKE!! THAT WAS LOW DOWN!!DON’T FEED INTO THAT BS WITH HER THO!!YOU KNOW SHE’S A NARCISSIST!! THEY F UP N EANT U TO FEEL SORRY!! NO MA’AM NO HAM!!! MOVE ON KEEP YA PEACE N LOVE HER FROM A DISTANCE
Sounds like she got mad because you didn’t get in trouble. She doesn’t have your best interests at heart. Just be very, very careful what she knows of your life. Don’t let her know your business.
Yes you cut her off. Toxic is toxic. She has threatened your family and shown you what she will do.
Document anything and everything. Do not block her texts just let her hang herself. Do not reply and do not answer phone calls.
Did she have a reason to be worried about the children though?
Cut ties. I hate to say that but of she is willing to do that what else would she do.
I live the my dad any son an I was making plans to move out last fall and he said he would do what it take to me sure I never leave with !my son anthem two days later cps came and adult cps because he told them I abused him an my son. And I know it was him even though cps can’t tell me but what cps said t claims where, were what my dads threats an Abusess were. I told cps what goes on an video proof an they closed the case saying there was no abuse. He called them again an sabotage every attempt to leave, takes me everywhere. I’m never alone. 90% of the time he’s looking over my shoulder while I’m on my tablet. Family has money an owned businesses and I’ve searched for help 100 miles away but I’m told I live outside their help radius but close to home everyone thinks he’s saint or afraid to cross him but now finally I have two new to the area support people that are working on helping us.
Toxic. Just cut ties and live as peacefully as you can.
Go on about your life. You DONT need the negativity that comes along with manipulation and narcism… I have cut my mom out of my life before and honestly I’d hate to do it again but I would if the situation called for it
I would cut ties even if temporary and let things calm. Focus on you and the kids. The case is closed. If you think she had part in it I would be careful having her or who ever around but if there’s nothing going on and your a good mom then CPS will continue to see that and you have no worries anyways. If she is toxic like you say then I think you
Know what you need to do despite how hard and difficult it might be. Your children come first.
Why is she calling CPS on you? I couldn’t imagine my mother ever doing that. Maybe stay away for awhile. That’s such weird behavior.
Cut ties if you know for sure it was her, at least until she can admit it and apologize and I still he Cautious around her!
I would call the younger siblings and them what is going on . Do you know what SHE is telling everyone else?