You will find a way . Us momma’s always do . I’m a single mom 2 boys 12&7 never once received a dime from em. I’ve made it work . Holidays are brutal but there’s help if need be
He can go for a cs modification and if he can get get the amount of cs dropped if he can justify the circumstances and if he does go in rears he can get a crappy job and offer to pay what ever he wants a week and most courts will take it because he is trying
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All y’all calling her bitter ect. over the money thing… She has EVERY right to be bitter. She literally owes that man nothing. Especially not slack when it comes to financial responsibility for his kid. It’s CHILD SUPPORT, she probably halfass relies on that to SUPPORT HER CHILD. Him going back to school shouldn’t effect her or their child especially not negatively and y’all are weird asf for acting like she owes him a reprieve for her to be a good parent or human.
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If he is trying to better himself let him. If y’all were still together you would be in the same position with him not bringing money into the household
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Why is this everyone’s main concern? Give the man a break and let him go to school. It’s a good thing. My ex hasn’t paid a dime in 3 years and honestly I don’t care. We get by so why bother him? If someone wants to take care of their child great! Thanks for being a good father. If not, it’s the children that are going to be impacted by it in the future.
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The likelihood of him going to jail are slim. My “father” went 17 years without paying and never was locked up.
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For all the people saying we should read the post properly, please read it properly yourselves. He does see his son she refers to him as a holiday dad!! Wknds and holidays, like most dad’s in a split … Always so quick to condemn the men!!
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Child support is based on what his current income is, if he has no income they will adjust the amount that he has to pay to the lowest amount possible or nothing at all while he is in school. For someone to actually go to jail for not paying child support takes ALOT that is the absolute last resort and there are multiple other things that would happen first, that process takes years. All he will have to do is get his amount adjusted by the courts
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His obligation will not disappear because of school. He will become a delinquent payor and have to deal with the consequences of his actions. If there’s a court order to pay.
Rachel Graham he let it be known to her what he was doing so he made it her business by telling her that his mommy was going to pay his other responsibilities but not child support. Hmm sounds exactly like he doesn’t want to participate in his sons life.
He will have his child support reduced to the bare minimum and most courts see education as an importance and that he’s trying to better himself. A man should take care of his child but not be drug down by his children’s mother. If he want to better himself then so be. He won’t go to jail for nonpayment of child support lol. His will be dropped dramatically.
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Love to be able to understand why him going to school is such an awful thing just because he wont be working and would not be able to pay…
He isn’t doing anything wrong by trying to better himself 
Hopefully if matters go back to court he can peacefully get a better education without worrying about jail time for trying to better himself 
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No idea how it’s works in your state. But in Canada. He would call the courts and advise of new income level and it would be adjusting accordingly if it was a dramatic difference. So going from $33 to $0 … he will probably pay close to nothing … then the following year he will have very low child support as he’s based in income from the year before
Here in Florida he cannot choose to take lower paying jobs willingly or just quit and not make enough. Judge would rule him to pay same. Fight it and don’t care about the consequences for him!
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Actually unless he has the support order reviewed, he still has to pay. If it is reviewed they will probably lower it. Depending on the judge, the judge might tell him to figure it out because it was his decision to quit.
The father is 50% responsible for his child financially . Nobody can make him be a dad but he is a father so …. Pay up buddy. You may have to be an adult and get a job while going to school so you can do your part in supporting your child😡
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He is lying to you. He cannot just not pay anything and quit a good job to go to school. There is more to this story…
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Im in school full time, work, and a single mom with no child support. He can do it buuuut so can you. Not a single one of us can tell you what a random judge in NC is going to think but in the end it is your job as the primary parent to make sure your financials are in order. Id consider finding a better paying job now since you have some heads up because your bills wont take “sorry, Im waiting on my ex’s mom to pay his child support” as payment.
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He still has to pay. Whats your states modification time? In my state it can only be modified every 2 years. If it’s time to modify it can be lowered. Otherwise if it’s not time to modify he will have to pay his part whether it goes into back child support or not.
In some states you lose driver license and any grants for school unless you are current w child support
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They base off income. He will be required to pay what he can afford. I have a friend who BD only pays $26 a month for his. Since he doesn’t make much. You can’t be mad at him for wanting to go to school and make a better living for himself or do what he loves. Hope it works out for all of you!
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So you’re not going to let him better himself because you only see your child for financial gain
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Well first he will lose his license and then he will go to jail and if he doesn’t have a license and he gets behind in child support he will go straight to jail do not pass go do not collect 200.
I support 2 kids all on my own. I’m mom and dad to both of my kids. I don’t want my kids father’s money I’ll do it on my own before I ask for money. It’s the children that their hurting and one day our children will see it was all momma who did everything!!
Good luck
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Well working for BMW, you have no life. Family or otherwise. I know, I used to work for that shitty company. They almost cost me my kids. Yea, you can make alot of money there but at what cost? Leaving there was the best decision I’ve ever made.
While I understand the importance of the father having to provide for the child, I have a hard time that the moms cannot figure out how to do it on their own if they had to…. (Speaking from experience).
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I go to school but still need to find a way to financially care for my kids and so does their dad. Yes he’s trying to better himself but kids don’t just stop needing things. Hopefully he finds a way to still pay his half even if it’s lowered
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It really depends on the state and judge that put through the order.
Links to both NC and SC are below but can be different depending on a judge.
I’ve personally seen a NC child support judge tell someone that chose to quit their job, that it was a choice and they still owed the money for the child.
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The courts will tell him he needs to have a job point blank, the judge will say “you dont have the luxury to not work, he has a child to support” and if he fails to pay then his lisence will be suspended … tax return will be garnished and then. he will eventually go to jail
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He is still responsible to pay support. The courts will let him know that. This doesn’t stop his responsibility to provide for his child. If he doesn’t he could lose his DL and be jailed. Food for thought.
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He’s being very careless.
He still has a financial obligation to the child, regardless of his career path.
I’m actually astounded at the women in here basically telling you to deal with it!
The child deserves to be both emotionally and financially supported by both parents.
Hopefully you can make it without the cs, because it sounds like “dad” doesn’t give a rats ass about your child.
It’s a calculation based off his income
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He will still owe the same amount now, if he quits that job by his own fault, he will still be expected to pay as if he still had that job. He can go to school part time or something like a normal working adult with children. He’s not a teenager, he has responsibilities.
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Um i feel like you should definitely help support him through school. He’s trying to become better which benefits the children & for you to threaten him with jail is shitty as fuck. Your first mistake is relying on child support. If you cannot support your child without child support then you need to figure something out. This is coming from a single mother of two who goes to school full time & works. So he could very well work but it might not be as much as you want. He can take it to court to have it reviewed. I don’t know if you know but schooling typically leads to more money. It wouldn’t hurt for a year or two. I couldn’t imagine if my kids’ dad said anything like this to me about being in school.
I have never received CS for either of my two kids from their dad. My kids are 13 and 7. It’s been 7 years for me. You can make it work.
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You’re incredibly selfish for only caring about money. You don’t care if one betters themselves but you care all about that green. Remember you acted like this so if you do something to better yourself I hope he treats you the exact same way. He can work certain days a week maybe weekends but not half as much that way he can still provide for his child, he can compromise on that. I do hope a judge is fair to him since you can’t seem be a decent human being. You need to be able to provide for your son without counting on child support because if you don’t get it then what? You’re screwed. Maybe while he betters himself, if you struggle without child support then look for a better job or better yourself. While he has to make compromises, so can you. I don’t care if that offends one, I can’t stand women that rely on child support rather than doing what they have to do for their child. Child support should be extra, not counted in your income.
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He still has to pay. Voluntarily quitting a $33hour job will likely leave his payment at whatever its been. They may modify it as you earn too, but they’ll still calculate him at $33 an hour.
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Most states will still require him to pay a minimum amount even if he isn’t working. The assumption is that he can find at least a part time minimum wage job. Legally speaking, he’ll be shooting himself in the foot if he stops paying without a valid court order. After a prescribed period of time, unless he’s filed a petition for a change in the current order, he’ll be subject to arrest or legal proceedings.
Depends on state but with it being income base, if he doesn’t have an income, you won’t get anything. It will stack up on him though. If he’s married and they file jointly, they will take it. Here if you don’t pay they pull your license then you go to jail. Fun fact **** if he gambles and has to cash in a scratch ticket or Keno ticket with the state he will have all that money taken for child support 
This is also your child. Regardless
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You were getting a pretty penny from his $33 an hour, maybe should’ve been saving that and not relied on it so much. Let the man go to school.
Hopefully he can get it revised and lowered and he can get a little part time job for you.
If he’s really that absent and doesn’t even want to provide financially then you should be able to easily have his rights signed away right? Just go that route problem solved.
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My ex owes me over 50,000 for our 3 girls and as long as he pays $10 a month, child support, they won’t put him in jail. It’s frustrating but these men know to pay just enough to keep out of jail🙄
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Wh would someone want to leave a $33/hr job to go back to school 
that’s a great wage, I would try to keep it and work it around school but I guess if you have mommy to fall back on…I don’t know. I couldn’t be dependent on my parents like that. I agree with a lot of people in the comments, I think judges probably won’t be so forgiving? I guess you’d say. If he’s quitting of his own accord that’s on him. Perhaps this new education will get him an even higher paying job, maybe it’ll work out in your child’s benefit in the long run. Sometimes it’s better to look at the bigger long run picture, even when it’s hard.
It will just be adding up with interest. I was out of work for 3 years and racked up a 37 thousand dollars bill and am still paying it off and my son is 20 now so he really should think about that. Plus losing his license and maybe going to jail. However you will be out of luck cause you can’t get water from a stone. Sorry 
If he wants the child support order mosified, he will need to go to court. Othereise it will just keep adding up. Jail is unlikely as my ex is only behind $55,300 and has never seen jail. If he has a bank account, they will take from that. If he will get unemployment, they will take part of that. Even unemployed, my ex was modified and obligated to $100 a month. Child support debt never goes away. He could file for bankruptcy and child support debt won’t go away. It is there forever
Since the day my boy was born, CS payments have been non existent. You just make it work.
If he goes to jail, then he goes to jail. No sense in being butt hurt over something you can’t control. It’ll just end up hurting your health in the end
Well exactly right he needs to go to family Court or the department of child support services and tell them that he plans on going to school and he’s going to stop work for a while… they are going to tell him that he has to have some kind of employment and they may reduce his payments but they’re not going to eliminate them all together. He has to go to them this is not your problem
I just think it’s sad you’re trying to stop him from bettering himself. A man should help take care of his kids but shouldn’t be drug down by the ex. He won’t go to jail, he’ll pay the bare minimum. & he’ll be getting a better education! See if you can get some type of assistance through the state & let the man become better.
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My husband’s ex did this but was primary and kept it from us and made the kids lie. So when they got evicted on Thanksgiving we learned about it. Some people just have no sense.
Don’t worry about it honestly 
taking hiM back to court to review the support order is the best you gonna do. He either will pay it or won’t but I’m sure you’ve been getting a nice child support payout over the years so hopefully by now you can support a child on your own until he pays again. State can’t force it jail time? He’s still not paying. Loss of license? Still not paying. But hopefully those things will force him to ensure he can at least still contribute to his child
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I find his attitude rather flippant, oh well i don’t have it to give. Unfortunately i learned rather quickly to never count on child support. Right now before he can’t give you another dine get your busget set up as if he gives you nothing. You may have to move if it helps pay your rent.
The plant should havesome way for him to work parttome and go to school part time. All other adults find ways to pay for school and their own responsibilities
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He is still responsible! He also is knowingly quit a job that pays child support. Judges can look at that as he is trying to get out of child support… I’ve seen and heard of this. Good luck. He will always have to pay though. If he don’t and the kid turns18 he Will still be paying. I am currently getting child support for my now 23yr old because he worked under the table for years to avoid paying. When she turned18 he got a legit job. And found out quick that he would have to pay child support.
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He is still ordered to pay, they will reduce the amount based on no income but he still will have an obligation. He’s such a DA to think, he wouldn’t have to pay. And unfortunately, previous comment, if he pays anything, he will likely not be pursued for jail etc… but the fun part in that is… the debt does not go away. My ex payed me until my son was nearly 22 years old. Support order ended at 18. But he was so far behind, he had to pay until the debt was payed. And referring back to a previous comment. No income does not mean no support. Each state has a minimum thats ordered based on 0 income. Years ago, I got $40 a week based on no income from my son’s father. They gave him 30 days to find a job and after that, it started accumulating. I think if your ex is educated enough to make $33 an hour and to want to pursue more education, he should know… this is not gonna go in his favor in the long run.
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Good luck. My ex owes $20000. He gave up his license, he doesnt pay taxes , and they wont jail him for any payments not made, and he isnt working living off his moms disability. My other ex as long as he pays $1 a month he is in “good” standing. It’s BS. The child support system needs to change. One parent shouldn’t have to bare all the resposibilty financially and otherwise to raise a child ever. Both sides have to step up or face consequences. IMO.
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It doesn’t mitigate his support obligation. The judge will tell him he still needs to pay
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Visitation and support dont cross , the court doesn’t increase or decrease support based on if they’re a good parent . He can likely file a modification to get the amount lowered . People do wayyyy worse than him and never pay ever. Court doesn’t care
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I’m sorry- I just have a different view on child support. I’ve been a single mom for years and never requires/request/wanted child support,
I decided I would just figure it out on my own. Yes yes - I understand it there kid too. However it has never left me in situations like this. It’s not anyone else’s in his family to figure it out, so leave his mom out of it.
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In Illinois, it’s based off % of income, if he has 0 income there’s 0 child support. Been down this road before myself. Nothing will be stacked against him though. If he owes back child support now, that will be taken from taxes after so many years. But the states can’t take 20% from zero therefore there’s nothing to take and there’s nothing to stack.
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You can do is contact the court and find out what would happen. If he’s working like that most places will allow you to go to school part time, he should look at all the information versus just part.
He can go back to court and get the order modified. Being that he’s not quitting just to quit, but to attend school, there may be some legal headway he has. My suggestion would be to ask a lawyer this question
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Good for him, it’s not a bad choice to go back to school if that’s what he wants to do with his life. However he is still responsible for paying some kind of child support, it’s up to him to go to court to have that readjusted.
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A lawyer would present to the courts how much he has the potential to make from his past employment, and that would be used to determine his child support obligation. My suggestion would be to set up payment through a third party to keep up when he pays and doesn’t.
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I know plenty of people that hit the books hard and still work.
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He’ll still have to pay. Just because you quit your job does not mean your kid no longer needs to be supported. But the odds of him going to jail over it is slim to none unless you bother them every single day to do something about the none payment.
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So the money is all that matters? Real child support is parental involvement. Funny you didn’t mention that at all. If you’re really worried about the money, better yourself and get a good job. “Independent” women who complain about child support are still depending on someone else to support them and are anything but independent.
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I’m in nc and I know they will redo to fit his income… which is none. Nc monthly minimum is 50 dollars. So say goodbye to that grand each month
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He’ll need to ask for a review from the court to determine how much he should pay since his salary is changing. If he doesn’t do that he’ll be expected to pay the same amount and his debt will only increase. After a certain amount it becomes federal. Also, if he still claims taxes they’d take his federal to pay c.s.
It’s so weird that some of y’all think it’s ok for a grown ass man to just forgo his responsibilities, quit his job & stop paying child support. When moms find ways to work , go to school & still take care of their kids. Y’all will make any excuse for a man to be a dead beat. 
.
Actually if he is going to school for he betterment of himself and he isn’t working, they can’t jail him but they most likely won’t because, he will be in school and most states don’t want to take away from that, but if you think something will happen that’s fine too.
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I don’t think it’s disregard. If it was, he wouldn’t have told you. He would have just done it.
He’s allowed to try and better his life as well as be a parent.
He can request a child support modification.
He can also potentially apply for unemployment if he’s going to school for a trade type of job.
He’s not financially abandoning him to be an asshole.
You could work with him rather than against him and come to an agreement of a number each month or maybe even items he can send each month. Have him make direct payments to the extracurricular activities if possible.
Just because he quits his job doesn’t mean he can quit paying child support. He can go have it modified but they will not drop it. It’ll also accumulate month to month but chances of them jailing him during a pandemic is pretty slim and they take other avenues before jail is even an option
It’s fine let him go to school in South Africa if the father can’t pay then we take the fathers parents to court for child support
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Call a lawyer. Right away. Before he quits.
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They don’t just base it off income anymore! The courts are well aware of people trying to pull stuff like this yo get out of support. They look at work history, education, physical ability, and average salary over time. He will not get off just paying nothing but he can likely get it reduced if he files a modification w the court or review w DHS. If he does nothing and just doesn’t pay you can take him to court for contempt and he will be ordered to pay and the amount stays the same unless a separate action for modification is filed.
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He’s still responsible for it.
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He will have to get his payments adjusted… and you will have to adjust your lifestyle 
. Chances are he has been paying way more a month than it actually takes to care for a child anyways.
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From what I seen happen, in texas, they don’t care if you quit a job, you better find away to pay it. They told someone I know, “if you’re not making enough to pay child support, get another job” they were complaining about not being able to pay their bills … in texas they will not play with you, 6months in county jail for not paying, I know a woman who went to jail 5xs over it.
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I don’t have an answer for you but the boys father is not active in his life why suggest pulling him out of a stable loving home and put him with his dad. That’s asinine. It is odd he would quit a good paying job to go live with his mother have her pay everything while he schools. Is he sick, just seems odd???
It will accumulate and he will have to pay
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In my state they will say because he voluntarily quit he still has to pay & since his mom will be paying his bills- That’s income & he will have to report it.
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You can definitely tell who the bitter baby mommas are in the comments… yall are so sad… the man is going back to school for fucks sake 
if you really rely on child support from a man to raise your kid you probably shouldn’t have kids…
In my opinion he has every right to better himself. I also don’t know how courts are there about pushing shit like this on dad’s. States are becoming more for the father’s because they’ve been repeatedly screwed for years. If you’re going to struggle without his child support, your kid is old enough to be left at home or a friends for you to get a second job, or possibly more hours at the one you have now. Unfortunately he’ll do as he pleases so it’s never a good thing to rely on child support. Technically it should be going to the child anyway. Been there done that, but my ex has paid maybe 6 months in the last 4 years. No jail time or license suspended🤷
He will still be required to pay regardless of his employment status. And if he doesn’t report it then they’ll still collect the current amount he is paying - and even with him volunteering to quit rather then balancing it out they may not adjust the amount he is supposed to provide for
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I would research the laws in your area & then forward them to him so he is aware of his repercussions if he stops paying. If the law is not in your favor, get an attorney before he quits his job to help you continue to get that child support. That would probably only take one letter from an attorney & he might choose to decide to work & go to school. Many people go to school & work to support themselves & kids. They do both!
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I’ll never understand some people. You can’t balance a full time job and go to school full time? 
I was a single mom, I had a full time and part time job and attended school part time. That man will still have to pay that support. He was making $33 an hour, I imagine that he paid a pretty penny in child support, he’s going to regret letting that get behind.
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This is the chance we take when deciding to have children. We have to be prepared to take care of them ourselves just in case the dad doesn’t step up to the plate.
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This is the chance we take when deciding to have children. We have to be prepared to take care of them ourselves just in case the dad doesn’t step up to the plate.
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Dunno how it works in his State, but in Kentucky, even if he don’t have a job, they will base it off of minimum wage. That’s what they did to my ex husband.
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Just wondering will he make 30hr plus benifits with his new career choice? I would think if he goes back to court then they might consider that too. I know a lot of people that go for higher degrees and make way less that 30/hr. And can he do like most people with responsabilities work and go to school part time or go to school full time and work part time. But the man has a responsability to support his child and its not like the mother isn’t working and doing her part.
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They will probably re do the child support for lower payments taking in account his household earnings and drop it lower to state minimum wage which is like 50 bucks. What I don’t understand honestly is you seem angry he wants to further his education. You also seem like you want to hold him hostage at his job to keep recieveing money which I understand you two have a child but he also shouldn’t be stuck. What happens if you wanted the same? Nothing. Turn the tables for a moment. I would be calling child support in his state to ask these questions.
I kinda see your concerns. But the father of my older daughter rarely if ever paid his child support. But honestly i could care less if he did, I mean yea, it’ll help with getting her something she’ll need when needed. But I don’t rely on child support. But with how things are with him right now, he can’t pay anything anyways. One of his ex’s blamed him for something they did and he accepted it when he didn’t even do it. Now he’ll be behind bars for about 8 years of our daughter’s life. And she loves him to no end. She’s about to be 7 this December. … So when he gets out she’ll be about 14-15 depending on if they let him out early or not. So … Just do the best for your son.
Go to court im sure the judge will tell him he can’t just quit its life u have kids u have to provide u want to go school fine but do it after or before work …if he was in hes life and u guys were married still im sure he wouldn’t just quit so take him to court asap!!
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Let the man go to school obviously he wants to better himself…
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They will likely adjust what he has to pay based off his income. But they might not cut him much slack if he’s voluntarily leaving a well paying position.
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I’ve been thru this. Whatever time he misses, they tack it on at the end. My ex missed 12 months (police academy), so they tacked it on at the end. I agreed to this because I made enough at my job.
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If he lives in a different state and stops paying, you will then need to go re-petition in HIS state or they cant take any legal actions against him… NC court cannot touch him in SC. Im not saying he’s in the right, but if i was you i would stop relying on that money because he’ll be safe as long as he doesn’t return to NC (or like i mentioned before, go to SC to re-petition)
Also, if he does continue to respect the CS agreement, all he will have to do is report that he left his job to pursue college (he has the right to do so) and they will reevaluate the monthly amount based on lower income. Which, that all depends on the mediators and how they feel about his decision. I guarantee you though if they want to give him grief over his decision he will most likely just ignore the payments and stay in SC.
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The courts don’t care that he isn’t working. They typically base it off minimum wage in these cases. It’ll go down after he goes to court but until then he still owes you what the court has determined
Do what YOU need to do as a parent. Pick up more hours at work. Find another stream of income
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Chances are high that his mommy will take care of everything. He will have to go back to court to get his child support payments adjusted. In my state if you are not working child support is $25 per child per month. You also go to jail if you are over $500 behind on support. He will probably have to submit his tax returns to the court while he is in school, plus something from the college that says he is attending. It could even be his grades. After he graduates if he has student loans they will readjust his payments again based on the debt that owes for those loans and his new pay. You should prepare yourself and your budget to not recieve as much as you are receiving now. Research the laws in your state, and look for a free consultation with a family lawyer.
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I lived in NC and fought with them over child support. They really don’t try very hard to go after them. My ex was 45,000 behind and when my daughters turned 18, they forgave the entire thing. With Covid going on, I sincerely doubt they will even bother. They may send a letter or two and hopefully that will scare him into asking his mommy to help him. We live in Tennessee now but my daughter has a son and the biological father hasn’t paid or anything since February and they haven’t even bothered and it’s through NC also. If she wasn’t the one to carry his health insurance, then she would have been screwed because he takes daily meds that costs over 300 without insurance. Not to add more to you but if he carries insurance, then you may need to start or see about Medicaid. You can also call your worker and let them know what he has told you. If you were lucky to get a good one, they may start working on it. With NC, don’t hold your breath. They wanted me to hunt my ex down and do their job. I told them it was a good thing I didn’t count on the money even though it would have helped. NC child support system sucks! I wish you luck and don’t forget about the insurance.