He will still be required to pay and if he doesn’t it will catch up to him. I never banked on receiving child support as me children’s Mom I pushed through and if we got it we got it, if we didn’t oh well. Did I struggle hell ya but taking time off my job to go back to court just was insane to me. As years went on he has bought them things when he could and helped them when possible but it should be about more than money.
Wth lady plz. The man paid his child support when he could. He’s going to school to get better for his child. Have a little understanding and hold the reins a bit. You seem bitter. You don’t seem like you want him doing better at all. I hope he goes to court and let them know what he’s doing so they lessen the child support payments and that he comes out successful for himself and his child. I’ll never understand the bitter baby mama’s.
In MI it was based off your potential to earn an income so they typically based it off of a 40-hour work week making minimum wage and he would actually have to file for an adjustment in child support in order to even consider being reduced if he just abandoned child support payments then he would be considered in arrears and face those consequences.
Depends on the state. I know my state will base support on past payment and potential to pay. So someone working 30/hour would still be paying 30/hour even if they quit. He will get arrears and he will lose his l’s, passport and will go to jail. Don’t listen to the pick me women. Make sure rhe support order is still active because every time he file taxes and get behind, you will be given his tax returns. Good luck and I hope you live in Michigan because it don’t matter if he quit his job. Unless he is injured and on disability, he will still be paying. And they rarely modify it without reason.
In Georgia , court ordered child support cannot be changed due to quitting job
If you are fired or layed off , responsible party can go to DEFACS or attorney and have readjusted
I would suggest going to DEFACS , or whatever state agency you have in NC and file paperwork with them
They should persue the case for you , get any back support if any at no cost to you
My state bases on potential to pay, so even without working hell still be on the hook. Plus he’s got to petition the courts to lower his payments to match his newly lowered income. So until that happens he’s on the hook for what he’s currently paying.
Take him to court. He can’t quit a job and stop paying child support. The people on here saying that’s ok just because he’s paid in the past are ridiculous, he absolutely has an obligation to support his child. Period. You don’t get to quit doing the right thing because you’ve done it previously. Wtf is wrong with those people?
Be prepared to go at it alone. Do take actions necessary if and when he stops paying child support however on your end just don’t count on it. Family court is a mess. Child support enforcement as well. The stories of arreas are far more common than the stories of a financially neglectful parent actually being made to pay. Don’t spend money chasing money though or filing motions to enforce. I did that for a short bit and it got me nowhere, every time just a verbal scolding from judge to my ex but never an actual consequence. So I learned to live and budget without it. He’s never paid for anything court ordered. It’s absolutely unfair and ridiculous but that’s the system for you. I hear the same or similar stories in all the support groups I’ve ever been a part of. Unfortunate for our children.
My son’s dad is always in between jobs… so my child support is pretty scattered and random. But I’ve learned to not need it. I support my son 100 percent on my own and I’ve worked my butt off to make sure it stays that way… What I get from him is just extra. I dont know your situation girl but my advice is to figure out how to not need it and not lose sleep over what someone else is doing.
That’s just a another way men get out of paying support for there kids you lay down and make them but lots of deadbeats don’t want to pay…my ex quit his job in November last year right before Christmas… hasn’t paid…yep I stuggle cant even get laundry detergent or TP…ect… court’s won’t do anything and he won’t spend one day in jail bc of covid… but he sure does get the child tax credit he sure did get the stimulus check and he lives with his mommy so no rent no bills… just spent it on drugs and alcohol…if he went to school to better his self I wouldn’t care bc in long run he could get a better job to pay his support… but no he spends it on drugs and alcohol…he couldn’t even give me half school clothes I had to get bookbag this stuff is not cheap…I pay rent bills car payment buy food ect…why he has no responsibility…he doesn’t even cook dinner or breakfast for our son everyone else does his mom his step brother his friends gf …he gets out of doing anything for our son… but he likes to bully our son…I’ve already called cys on him there a damn joke got wait till get hurt in order for them to do anything…he slap our son in the face twice… system sucks the courts suck…they rather a alcoholic and druggie farther then no farther at all… wish someone would change the system wish some of these judges listen to the mother’s…
Need to get a good attorney involved immediately. If he’s already making $33/hr, going back to school seems more like a personal wish than actual need so as a parent, child should come first. Unfortunately, too many courts always assume that women and kids can somehow just adjust so need to fight from the get-go.
Your too dependent on that money🤦♀️… you should be happy for him. Smh. His support order will stay the same though until yall have it revised, something he has to request. He should though to lower his payments till finished with school.
If his Mom is paying his living expenses including allowance, he should make sure ALL of his expenses are covered, including child support.
You should never rely on income coming from someone else. You are lucky that he was even paying to begin with. It sucks but we’ve all been there a few times. Nothing to do but to pick up some extra shifts, start bargain buying and spending sparingly. If this is what he wants to do nothing you will say is going to change his mind. Men are stubborn like that
Never rely on child support tbh I’ve raised my children on the income I have the guy owes 30 grand but I’m not worried he never helped with my children and ik the money he makes is dirty money u’ll make it thru just cut down on things that aren’t needed
I wish i got child support
Your asking a group of moms who many have never seen a dime. Count your blessing you got anything.
If he hasn’t been there really then I wouldn’t care what happens to him, iv been thru it myself but 3 boys from ex husband n had to do it by myself for years he would pay n then not pay, change jobs,pay increase or decrease, be in rears of back child support…the child support division where u live will put him in rears but you yourself will have take him back to court so judge knows why he’s not paying an then they will make him pay the minimum for your state without a job, best thing is let child support keep him in rears at 33hr…I was single mom like I said 3 boys, I worked, but I had to have the state for boys insurance, they will give you plus your son food stamps, an every year for back to school you can get a voucher for 200 for clothes n shoes…I used that help when my ex wouldn’t pay or no job, I made sure to never count on his child support to pay any of my bills
Well he could go to school at night, or work at night. His choice, he has responsibilities.
After he does quit his job and go to school he will have to file with the courts to review his C/S and since he is not working and making what he was they will more than likely go off of 40 hrs/week at whatever the minimum wage is in the state. So he will still have C/S to pay. IDK what $$ amount your state will go after him once he fails to pay it but he will have back support to pay
Um he will have to find a job
My ex husband was working under the table for years and they based his child support off minimum wage because something had to be set weather he was working or not. He’s now 90k in debt for not helping support our two daughters and he’s never been put in jail. He’s had his license suspended but that’s about it!
You’ll probably have to pick up extra shifts, but he’s a POS for leaving you completely financially responsible for your kid you have together.
I see a lot of bitter baby mamas saying you’re lucky you even got anything. I say bullshit. It’s his kid too to provide for. Men are ALWAYS left off the hook. I hope you get it figured out girly…
Without even mentioning new York I can tell this was written by an American why is all about the money with you people. That’s some special Ed level shit
In TN he still has to pay. Won’t be as much but will be based on minimum wage.
This is yet another case where a man is not held accountable for his responsibilities to his own child . It’s ALL on the mother . Are yal for real !? And if he has no income he can go back to court and he probably won’t have to pay or pay as much anymore . Until he actually does that , it will become what he owes and it can even go to collections and a list of other things until he gets it taken care of
Unfortunately it depends on what is granted by the courts. My ex husband was homeless and not working when my son was a baby, but they ordered him to pay $95 a month. It added up as back pay until he got a job. My son is going to be 17 and he still only pays $95 a month because it wasn’t worth going back to court. I never depended on getting that money anyway because I didn’t know if he was going to keep his job or not.
You shouldn’t rely on that. Also schooling is temporary, and I think it’s sad your upset that he is furthering his education to get a career.
Some of Y’all baby mamas are vile. That’s all I’m saying here.
$33/hr. He’s quitting $68k/year to go to school for what? Sounds like a financially dumb move to take on a bunch of debt when he’s not likely to make much more than that upon graduation. In my state both parents are held to “earning capacity” so he would still be liable for the full amount. Pretty much the only way to get around that or going to a lower earning capacity is if you lose your job due to circumstances beyond your control - like you got laid off. I couldn’t quit my $65k/year job to take a job making half that and have child support calculated off my new income but also neither can my ex.
I love all the PMAB in here demanding Mom be happy that her ex is going to school. How many of us get to just forget our responsibilities to go to school? It’s not like he was working a minimum wage job, he’s making close to 70K a year.
Typically they determine support off of earning capacity if someone intentionally quits their job
However - not sure about that state but he’s going to have a full year of not paying before they even start to care.
I wish I could just up and quit and know my kids will be taken care of lol
Sounds like he is trying to better himself and your salty…
Most women today are handling everything by themselves…most work 2 jobs and go to school and take care of home…If you are one that has support of any kind from the dad consider yourself LUCKY…
Oh my gosh thank you for teaching me the term “Holiday dad” this is perfect.
Hes gonna either have to find some type of work or ask his mama for the money for cs. Take his lazy entitled a** back to court.
Im sorry, but i cant imagine how frustrating this is on everyone involved. He sounds spoiled and entitled.
It’s just a running tab. They will take it via taxes, take his license, any sort of new government funded money. And when he gets a new job depending on how yalls child support agreement is set up, but whatever job he gets, his employer is required to take it from his paychecks.
You don’t need his money, if you cNt handle the bills by yourself downgrade till you can. Let your ex try to high his education, he is up-to-date on child support. CP will look at his current situation and lower to what he can pay.
Don’t mean to sound harsh but I have 6 kids and NEVER went for child support. Grow up in foster care so I didn’t have any help. If I can do it with 6 you can do it with 1
Hes bluffing…he will go to Jail, oh well, they will prosecute you even if you willing quit your job, courts dont play that game…
It will stack up he will lose his driver’s license and possibly go to jail. Tell him don’t do it he will regret it
you have to just let it play out, he will go into reers… it will add up, depending on your state
It amazes me how much some of these men pay in support, when the mother doesn’t even spend that much on the child. They spend it on themselves for fake everything… Learn to make your money, and stop relying on others to support your child… I don’t care if the father isn’t paying or not… figure it the F out
Yet nobody wants to talk about the deadbeat mother’s who don’t pay a cent and you all excuse it by oh well she lost her baby, you can’t force her to pay … Double standards much!?
Let the man go to school and better his life. Holy crap. Let him better himself. You can still 100% take care of your child. Unreal. Women do this all of the time. Rely on just the man to support them and their Child so they can go to school. Unreal. Btw. You’ve only got 4 years left of mandatory child support. Maybe it’s time you learn now how to do this on your own. A car… First rental… stuff like that… that’ll be on you…
Let the courts habdle it, you can even inform them and request an increase. Where they will nip his plans in the bud.It doesn’t matter what his plans are he is still financially responsible for his son.
I would never get in the way of my babydaddy going to school even if that meant losing child support. the expanse of knowledge would be a lesson by itself to our children.
You sound pathetic. Why not make an agreement with him, to lower the support to a manageable amount, so he can better himself? Why don’t you find a second source of income? You sound very bitter. I feel bad for your son.
Why is it he can’t go to school and keep his job…how old is he??? His Mom really isn’t doing him no favors…he may never go back to work if she’ll pay his way forever and he HAS a great job what education is he looking for…a better job??? The court system will make him answer more than you or your son and his mommy will…….I’m sorry I’m all for going back to school but not going back to 17 yrs old
Maybe the dude is having a midlife crisis and hates his fckn job! Some people’s parents are more than happy to step in and help their adult child out if they’re miserable and they have the means to offer them help whether it’s financially or not. And for you to be so sure he will be jailed sounds bitter as fck, jealous even.
I’m not sure how he will look in court, I never took either of my kids’ dads for child support bc I’d figure it out myself before expecting shxt from either of them. I can tell you how you’ll probably look in court if you go in there and bring all of this up though. You’ve made it this far without him physically being there for the past 11 years and sounds like he’s been paying this whole time- cut the dude a break girl. Did you really call him a holiday dad when you said he’s been gone for over a decade except when you get your child support payments? I’d count your blessings that you were even getting that if he’s as terrible as you’re tryna make him sound.
If I was his Mom I would not help him out with Allowance he make his own money for child support
He will have to ask for a modification. So until then he will still owe what he pays now. It will back up until he makes a move. It isn’t your responsibility to handle that.
Gains interest and is still owed to child. No way out of it. Just like if parent goes to jail or gets sick.
Child support is based on income and if his financial situation changes, he can ask for a modification and have it lowered.
My son is 17. Never met his Dad. I have spoken to him since 2004.
I’m pretty thankful that the drama of knowing his life and what not haven’t been my concern.
If a guy doesn’t want to be there. Why are you chasing him?.. Let the courts handle it.
A lot of these women seem bitter. I’m sorry. As a parent you don’t get to just quit your job and quit providing. If his momma can help support him and is encouraging him to do this because she’s able to provide she should also provide for the grandchild.
The amount of women and advice being given in this thread is disgusting, entitled and very concerning so you just care about the money and not him trying to better his life? Ok got it
Woret thing that will happen they will suspend his driver license and he will have arrears you won’t get any money mama till he start paying again hope this helps
He’s going to school to better his life. Agree upon a lower amount and support the father of your child going to school. People change career paths all the time.
Wanting to better yourself doesn’t mean you get to give up your responsibilities sorry not sorry most parents would love to just drop their responsibilities to go back to school etc but as an adult you have to accept the decisions you made
Leaving a job to go back to school doesn’t eliminate his child support obligations. So he still has every responsibility to pay those child support obligations until your son is 18. He’s gonna have to figure it out. But there’s nothing much you can do so there’s no point in stressing over it because you are wasting your time doing that. If he defaults, the state will come after him for his license, penalties and or jail time. My sons father is defaulted/behind over $7000 in child support. I know there’s nothing I can really do so I don’t even stress. I know that the state is after him and that’s all I can do is just sit back and let them do their job. But at least your sons father doesn’t sound like a complete deadbeat. He sounds like he makes really good money and only wants to make more.
Since it bothers you so much why don’t you give him the kid and pay him child support. Sounds like all you care about is child support if you want your kid support him if you can’t give the kid to the father. See how the tables turn. For whoever don’t like my comment get mad. You never know what ppl are going through especially being on the other side it’s not about you. Smh🤷🏻♀️
You worry about you, your job, and your son. He’s on a child support order from the courts. Let them take care of it. If you still have questions call your case worker at the child support office. Adjust your spending and life accordingly.
I’m sorry for these “women” bashing u over child support- it all depends on the courts. Let him go back to school and do his thing. If he’s paying right now he’s still promised to pay the same amount
I would do it too…no job means minimum payments…last I checked it was less than a hundred bucks a month…per child…flipping burgers for minimum wage??? Yup same deal.
It’s been long enough. You really shouldn’t count on his money for you 2 to live. He’s trying to better his life
He needs to ask for a modification due to circumstances. He wants to better himself and your stance on this is selfish and gross.
He can get a lower payment of like 25.00 a month all he has to do is turn in his wages and ask for a decrease in child support mom has no say it’s just the judge decision ultimately you will be getting $25/$55 dollars a month …. It’s a fairly easy process as well guess your gonna haven’t to do something else
Wow. Idk what everyone on here is smokin’ but like I wouldn’t be able to feed my child without my child support from my ex husband.(and it ain’t much trust me) And yes I have a job too but damn do y’all even have kids? They are expensive. If he didn’t wanna pay child support he should have signed away his rights. At least he didn’t do that. If he wants to go to school fine but if you rely on that child support income then hopefully the court will handle it. I understand. These other women must not be divorced😅
He still owes child support
Child support?? What’s that? I’ve been a full time mommy, full time employee & full time student with no help from anyone! Just me and my daughter! No one said it would be easy. Pull up your big girl pants and make it work!!!
I mean…I know it’s probably not for everywhere else in the US but for a few states! People run to North Carolina because they’re a sanctuary for those who pay for child support cuz they don’t work with other states because to make sure those POS’ have to pay.
Child support agency does not care whether he goes to school works or sets on a curb he is responsible for this child until he is 18 years old and in some incidents if the children go to college until they’re a certain age or out of college so if he chooses to go to school and not work he’ll just sit in jail my family is in North Carolina I would imagine that you may would have to go back to court in the state in which it was issued I know that when it’s paid it goes through the court system eventually to you but I would just let him know that the day he quits his job you will notify child support let them deal with him it’s sad but you know he’s going to eat have a car have electric have water while he’s going to school so your child deserves the same I think he’s just trying to smoke to see what you’ll do and he may be getting student loans to help cover his expenses but however child support goes on no matter what they’ll withhold his income tax here in Ohio you lose your driver’s license and you go to jail not your fault start the process the minute he quits his job
They may lower the payments BUT he still has to pay some amount for child support. I knew someone that took a less paying job to spite his ex. The judge wasn’t stupid. Added an extra $100 to his monthly. He still has a responsibility to his child. I have 3 children and have NEVER received a dime. I made it work in my situation.
I see a lot of people saying support the father and help him. WHY SHOULD SHE DO THAT WHEN HE DOESNT SUPPORT HIS OWN CHILD!!! Some of you are ridiculous I don’t have great advice to give because I have only been in the situation as the child between the two parents going through all of this mess and I just hope whatever you decide that you just think of what is truly in the best interest of your child.
So I live in PA and it may be different but I own a business and have a gentleman I have to deduct child support from…
They are going off of what he is “capable” of making due to his past employment. He used to drive truck so was making better money. We are a small business and don’t pay close to that. I have to deduct 55% out of his checks.
If you’re lucky, they’ll go off of what your ex is “capable” of making amd won’t adjust it much
Asking FB when you should be asking a lawyer.
In NC, he’ll have to work with the court to ensure it’s paid. If not, it’ll be in your, depending on the county, to enforce the order.
The judge at order him to either get a job or ensure it’s paid bc quitting doesn’t look good.
Jesus…going to school wont eliminate his obligation but why are you so bitter? You seem like you just want him to cater to you an pay your way. He’s going to school to better himself and all you are worried about Is money. Why dont you get a better job if you can’t do it. What do you think single parents do that dont have child support? You just seem so bitter and selfish. Especially since you are pushing jail time. My sons sperm doner pays HALF the amount that he was supposed to because he lied to me and the child support office, but guess what? I dont care cause i dont rely on him to pay EVERYTHING cause I am a mother with responsibility and I’m not just a useless woman who cant take care of my child without a man… I also dont care what he is doing with his life cause I’m not a bitter baby mama. He could have 10 more kids that hes using all his money on even though some could be going to my son as well but shit happens an im not gonna be stuck an bitter over it. Suck it up and learn how to pay for your child…cause…ya Know…it is also your child… Just cause he’s a man doesnt mean he’s gotta pay everything.
So he hasn’t had a relationship with his child since he was 3? So for 10 years you’ve been getting money from someone that doesn’t come around your child at all. ? If he’s been making $33 an hour you’ve been getting a good chunk of money every month. And because he hasn’t missed a payment and just mentioned he’d be going to school your freaking out? Your only in that for money period. I’ve taken care of 3 kids alone with nothing more than an extra 250 in child support a month and ive only gotten that from my oldest dad and it’s only been coming for about 2 years consistently and he is fixing to turn 8. If he’s not around to even care for the child he’s not a father period. I wouldn’t ask for a dime. But I’m petty who knows.
- He is trying to better his life which will better your child’s life.
- You are NOT a sole parent. You are clearly talking about his dad, meaning he has 2 parents. Your not even the sole provider because you get child support.
- He still has to pay so he should just go to court to have CS amount readjusted.
- Maybe ask that since he isnt working he take the child 50% of the time and then maybe both of yall can go to school.
he’ll be in jail for not paying the judge will tell him he still has to work even while in school. hell they told one dude since one job wasn’t enough to cover his child support order he had to get another job or get behind and go to jail for not following the judges orders.
It’s been 10 years by my self… no support from him or his family. Let the courts decide.
In PA they don’t care you still have to pay. If you don’t have employment they do what is called right to assess which they go by minimum wages and still have to pay
Girl I completely understand you. I had a deadbeat b
Dad and he would quit a job as soon as they started taking money away from him. I asked the child support office after years of him not seeing his kids or supporting them when they will put him in jail. They said if he is in jail he cannot look for work. He wasn’t looking anyway. So he got away with everything. Good luck. Start trimming your expenses because he is gonna do what he wants and you and your son will suffer for it. As far as all these people talking mess. Ignore them they probably are mad because their new boyfriends have to support their kids. Its in the Bible. You are supposed to support your family.
There is absolutely nothing wrong with him going to school. Hes paid it sounds reliably for 10 years. Give the man a break from the stereotypes. Deadbeats don’t pay. This guys trying to make a better life for himself.
In my state, they’d tell him to get a part time job, period. But like others have said, the amount will be modified.
Lots of people go to school AND work part time, how else can they live? And he doesn’t have a child to make arrangements for, so it should be fairly simple.
I.e. when I first went to court for child support (5 years ago approx.) my ex didn’t have a job on the books. The judge told him he has to find a way to pay the amount for a full time, minimum wage job which at the time was $97 a week. (Around 33%)
I dont believe the court will care, he will still owe. Kids still need to eat just because “dad” wants to not work, thats on him, but Im guessing he wont be hungry. But MOMMY has/will always bail him, but not for her grandkids? HMMM. sounds like trash. Let the court handle him.
Child support don’t stop just cause they quit it would have to be modified if anything
Idk if it works the same in your state, but in mine my dad owed the back child support up until he paid it off when it 20 (had he not come into a lump sum of money he would’ve owed even longer than this) and because he went so long not paying, when the child support agency found out he had a new job they garnished his checks every week.
So salty yikessss sucks to be you
If it is already in the court system, I seriously doubt you hay any control. And I am sure he has been given the “rules” by the system. About the only thing you can do is start a budget and prepare for a possible reduction of funds coming in.
Let the courts handle him.
It’s as easy as that.
Don’t worry he will still have to pay. But why shouldn’t he be able to go back to school? If you wanted to go back to school you could quit your job and go on welfare. And that’s perfectly acceptable. But if Dad wants to go back to school he HAS to work and pay you still or he goes to jail. Sexist and not equal at all
Why doesn’t his mother pay his child support, instead of everthing else. That’s more important!!!
It seems that money is all you are worried about.
I don’t get why people get so upset when the mom wants the child support money. I count on mine. It helps a bit
Can you live without the support?
Does the child and father have a good relationship?
Is it really worth the chance of your child seeing you as the bad person for sending their father to jail?
In short. If losing the child support effects you that much. After 11 years you should have planned out your life better For your child.
His debt won’t stop. I worked for Child support here. The debt accumulates and ruin his credit, seizes his bank account in some states (not sure of yours) and they sometimes repo your car to sell to pay off the debt.
I’m in NC, and no, he will not be thrown in jail. Sounds like you’re more worried about it for your sake. I’m not seeing anything where he said he will quit paying, and if his mother is helping financial while he returns to school, what’s the issue? He can file for a review and they’ll lower child support to the minimum due to being in school, so prepare for that too. He is not financially abandoning his son. Sounds like he’s trying to better his own future which will allow for better things, and you shouldn’t be so bitter towards it.
You will have to process a “motion to enforce terms”
The court /DA won’t know he switched jobs or quit his job. You need to inform the court of his status or he informs them. You already know he won’t so you will need to.
They will keep sending correspondence can take his license and put him. In jail after a certain amount is in arrears.
Get a better job then. His support will be lowered dramatically
Is he CRAZY OR JUST PLAIN STUPID
Most men don’t understand that unless they have help raise there kids.