How did the single parents of this group deal with the other half walking away and not wanting anything do with the child and what would you do if they still had a vehicle that you purchased and stopped making payments on it to further cause issues in your life?
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Report the car stolen if it’s in your name
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Focus on the kid and don’t worry about the other parent. The kids notice who’s there and who isn’t.
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Had this happen to me.
Take the car back and sell it. That’s the only option to not deal with repossessions or bankruptcy.
And being a single parent is way easier than dealing with another’s BS.
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If they are paying off the car then just change the name some times being the only parent around is better than having both
It was hard for me at first but once I realized babys dad being gone was actually PEACEFUL I knew…ok its not worth her being around dysfunction. Plus I’d rather some shit head be gone and stay gone rather than show my daughter that sticking around for the bullshit is OK. I dont ever want my baby thinking that’s how relationships work or for her to be disrespected and cool with that. Not in this house! And report that car stolen or call the financing company and see what options you have.
The car thing is going to be a hard one as he has possession of it. Just because you are paying it, just because payments are in your name it doesnt mean it’s yours. Its a civil matter, the cops won’t do anything. He hasn’t stole it if hes been using it for ages etc
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My mom had a bf that had a truck that he owed payments on it n they got into it n split she called the car place n told em he was leaving state n they came got the car. But I’d c about a lawyer
You do what you have to do for your kids. It’s hard but eventually you’ll realize anyone who can leave you and your child isn’t worth having! And if the car is in your name then call the cops. You can definitely have something done about it!!!
I hope the car is in your name! I’m pretty sure you can get it back if so but it just depends on how the law enforcement will take it, but do seek an attorney. As for single parent, you don’t need him. I’ve been a single parent since my child’s birth and although it’s hard, you don’t feel the burden of having to deal with your ex-significant other’s actions burdening on you. You’re doing great and just continue to be the best parent to your child cause that’s all that matters at the end of the day
If the car is in your name, report it stolen because it is. The cops will assist you in getting it back. If it is registered in his name with the lease/loan in yours, you can try contacting the company and seeing if you can change the name on the agreement, but it would be unlikely. Otherwise, your only option is to go to court and sue for the amount of the payments you’ve had to make on the car. If you struggle financially, you should contact legal aid for assistance.
My daughter is 10 now. Long story short he was abusive physically and mentally. I was scared of him and he never once did anything for his daughter he was told her never have. I left him when she was 14 months old. He uses her as a sob story. I was scared to be a single mom. Best thing I ever did. Yes it’s not easy but your kid will thank you one day. 9 years later he has a new baby and life. Doesn’t attempt to contact her ever. I pray his son has the dad he deserves 
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Then again with my now 5 year old son. Dad in army. I’ve known him for a long time. Found out He used me. Got me pregnant then disappeared. Blocked me on FB. people randomly pester him still calling his BS out. Harder with 2 kids alone. But I am the strongest woman any of my friends know.
As for the car it depends who’s name it’s in. They pay. If not then I would try to get a new ride or talk to to whoever you pay and explain the situation
STAY STRONG AND WORK YOUR ASS OFF FOR YOUR KIDS. YOU CAN DO IT!!! GOD IS TRULY GOOD .
my current situation is proof. Almost a year ago I lost everything with 3 kids in my car. Came to stay in my car or live in a basement. I took a roof for my kids. And after working my ass off I officially bought my first house yesterday
If it is under your name and you all are not married you have every right to go pick it up. If he doesnt want to give it to you nicely call the police and show them the title or buyers paperwork with your name and not his. He cannot keep a car that is not his. If you really want you can also call the company agency of the car and turn it back in and give them his residence so they can go pick it up and cut your loses . Dont let him keep it.
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On the car have the car company go and get it . Or if it’s your name take the police with you to get it . And if he dont want anything do with kid(s) that’s his lost .
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Let them walk away from the child it’s not worth the fight their lose the child will see later who was there and who wasn’t and you call a towing company get it picked up from their house and either return it to the company or keep it and continue payments if their name it not on the contract
Call car dealer, they pick it up. You have to know address!
I’m a single mum and honestly it’s the best thing my ex walked away after planning the pregnancy as soon as I told him I was pregnant he told me he trapped me and had been cheating on me for months she aborted her baby with him and I stayed but a week later he left saying I was unattractive and ugly and going to be a trash mum . Life’s better my son is amazing and now I have a partner who loves our son a hundred million percent 
happy ending xx
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I’m a single mum. I dealt with it by having a good cry (well…a few of them) and then getting my shit together and working hard and saving and giving my kids the best life I possibly can.
I just realized that I have to be strong for my son and give him all the love and support I can. His dad bailed when I was 6 months pregnant and now he’s almost a month old. I just remind myself I gotta soldier on for my little boy and that his dads the one missing out and will have to live with that regret. It’s hard being both mommy and daddy but I wouldn’t trade it for the world. 
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We were 17 and he left when she was 6 months old. He never saw her again and she is now a married 28 year old Nurse. I won’t tell you it is easy emotionally on you or your child but you can recover. I am married and we now have twin 4 year old boys and our last son is due in August. It took me 24 years to trust and love another person enough to have more children but I couldn’t be happier. I focused on my career, education and providing her with the best life I could. I joined the Military to provide opportunities for myself and for her. I worked out and spent as much time as possible with her. I never talked bad about him and I always left the door open for him to be apart of her life. I told him he could step into her life but not to step out again, of course that didn’t happen. I encouraged her to talk about it and gave her the best male role models I could. I focused on boosting her self esteem so she knew his decision wasn’t because of her. I hope this helps and God Bless​:kissing_heart:
Also, report the car stolen. Kindness doesn’t mean he can put you and your child in more hardship.
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I was in the same boat, only I am left paying for a credit card. The card was in my name, but collected debts from him. I’ve always turned to God, yes I am paying payments for something I didn’t do, but I have my child, they are healthy, and I am still alive. Everything you endure, will always bring something good. Just keep on doing what you do, and try to always focus on the good! I will be praying for you❤️
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I used to cope by playing video games with my kids…but since my roommates put me and my 2 boys to the curb and we are in a homeless shelter now I chain smoke
Go to court file to get ur car back
It’s in ur name
Never trust he will pay for it.
And then file for full custody and child support
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If the car is registered to you it’s yours take a cop and go get it
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It’s better to have him not want anything to do with the kids than the opposite where he tries to take the kids off you.
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Pick yourself up and get on with the business of life. Let the pos rot. My ex died of cancer last year. He decided his kids would not be a part of his life. Not going to lie, it was rough. His was worse. I told him he would end up a lonely old man and die alone. That is exactly what happened. We were told he shed many tears. Not sure if it was true but it was the decision he made. Don’t let another man do that to you again. Make sure they can stand on their own and are respectable.
I have 2 kids. Single parent of 11 years, no child support no help. I worked my mind crazy going to online school when I put my kids to sleep and even did school work at work, and got my bachelor’s with my first and Masters with my second. It was a scary, but we did it. I flew them to California with a loan just to show them why mommy worked so hard and let them watch me get my Masters! I then could not find 1 job in my degree in my state so I stepped out on faith and moved my kids and I to South Florida! OMG the struggle… I finally got a job after 4 months my friend that I was staying with was on bs so we went to a shelter and they helped us find a place eventually… Prayer is what helped me get through it, I lost my faith plenty of times but when I saw people being placed in our life from nowhere willing to go above and beyond to help. I now have a man who loves my kids and only wants me to get myself together while he pay all the bills.! It will get better. Find your strength. I know it’s hard but you will get through it​:heart:
oh and I would report that car stolen shit it has your name no proof of payments from the other person so fuck it. You have to make decisions that will help you and your kids.
File for legal separation for now that way you will have custody of the child and they will order him to give you the car back since you have the child and probably child support. If you can afford a lawyer now then go ahead and do that. I didn’t do it and my ex now kidnapped my child and moved to Nebraska because we both had a right to the child I couldn’t do anything. I did get my child back but I wouldn’t want anyone to go through that. Do what you need to do Fast.
My kiddos father bailed when I was 4 months pregnant. He’s never asked about, looked at, seen or even acknowledged him. He’ll be 3 in a few months. I sent a text every day for 8 solid months, same message, same time “ready to meet your son yet?” And never got a response. So I hired a lawyer, served him with termination papers, he voluntarily signed them within the first couple hours of being served and now has ZERO legal responsibilities to my child whatsoever now or ever. Still sucks bc I wanted more for my son BUT he’s sooooooo happy, healthy and thriving and he wouldn’t be had he had to have been flip flopped around every which way all the time. Change perspectives. God is good.
Report the vehicle stolen if he refuses to give it back. You need to keep making those payments or your credit is gonna get ruined.
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If cars in your name report it stolen lol get that shit back why still be helping them like that
Have the car company repo it
He left before my son was born, the way I saw it is that if they walk away you won’t ever have to worry about visitation or them being a jerk to your child. You can raise them the way you want without having to bicker about something. It’ll be hard and it has been for me because I was 13 and had to raise my son alone and go through high school, but as long as they know you love them and you all are safe, happy, and healthy that’s what matters!
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Moved on. I didn’t really care that he wanted out. I was fine Bc I wouldn’t want my son to have to deal with his bio dad only being there when he wanted or felt like it. So now he has a wonderful father in his life. My bf stepped up and has been there and treats him as his own.
Life is hard either way you see this. We all want 2 parents for our child. When that is not possible kids adapt. You adapt and you learn to make choices that affect your child in the best ways possible. Don’t bad mouth kids always find out the truth. They grow quickly and remember who was there. Get sole custody and support going. Get the conservatorship settled before anything. Get your car back also. You will be just fine if be never shows up again and so will your child.
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Your car your credit .
If the car is in your name, you can report it stolen and he’ll be forced to drop it off to you. I’m a single mom and honestly I wouldn’t change it for the world. I wasn’t meant to be with my children’s father and he wasn’t made for me. I was simply meant to be their mother, nothing more. As broken as “single mother” sounds, I assure you there is nothing broken or lacking in my life as a single mom.
Call the fianace company and explain the situation. They will repo the car off him and return it to you. That If it’s in your name and not both your names.
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As for the single parenting… Stay strong and carry on and focus on yourself and baby
I’d give him 24 hours to return my property and then I’d report it as stolen.
File for child support.
Continue on with life as best you can for the child. Routine, stability, love,
If the car is in your name, report it stolen.
I was too nice in my divorce. I wanted to believe he read capable of being an adult. He had been a good father but a shitty husband. The thing I didn’t think of was that he would use the kids as pawns… or at least try.
2.5 years ago my 16 yr old daughter cut ties from her dad. I tried for years to get him to listen to his children. Nothing has changed. Now our son is 11 and struggles with his relationship with his dad, always has [he had just turned 2 when we split].
After 9.5 years their dad still shows seriously jealousy towards the kids’ relationship with me. After tears of trying to help their relationship with their dad I have up. I can’t fix what their dad isn’t willing to, i can only be the best possible parent I can be. My kids know that they can trust me and know that I will always have their backs.
I wanted my children to have a better father but I can’t continue to beat myself up for it. I refuse to allow his existence (or lack thereof) to exhaust me. They’re still be a day where I will be free of him. They’re still be a day where my kids can stand up to him. I will continue to be there for them♡
My sons dad left when he was a year old my baby is 4 now. If you think you can then you can
Im gonna be honest, I was relieved despite the financial struggles I couldn’t even be sad because the peace of mind was great honestly. This was not easy and still isn’t
Report the car as stolen.
You should have reported the car stolen the moment he left with the car. You can still report it stolen. You are also entitled to child support. Take him to court for child support and to get the car back! My situation is different from yours. I have been a solo parent for 12 years. The difference between solo parenting and single parenting is that with single parenting the other parent is alive and with solo parenting you are the sole surviving parent. My husband was murdered and I could go on and on about the mess he left me to deal with. He did not leave my son and I provided for. I was left with funeral expenses, debts, bills, and a 14 month old child. My son and I have been through a lot and have come a long way in 12 years. God helps handle all we are given.
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Deep breaths and one day at a time. Go through the courts about child support and getting your car back. Know its not your fault, the father is missing out not you. My best advice as a single mom myself raise your child with all the love and support you have, have family close to you, dont bad mouth him in front of your child they will grow to see the kind of person he is and see how strong and amazing you are. I’m so sorry your having to go through this but us single moms have to stick together and support each other.
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Id straight tell the people calling to take the car since its not in my possession. But if you do need the car just save payments until they tow it and then they’ll let you know and ask if you wanna work on getting it back. Other than that you have to just accept the fact that he is a pos person. Nobody should leave their child but in a sad reality it happens alot. Be strong. Your baby needs you.
I’ve come to the conclusion it’s his loss my daughters are amazing and he is the one missing out in the incredible people that they are! And as for.the car report it stolen if it’s in your name
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Single mom from the beginning.
It hurt like absolute hell but I realized I didn’t need him. That my son was better off without him.
Because of this, I’ve never ask for child support. Never took him to court. Never but him on the birth certificate. He just doesnt exist.
If he ever tries to come back I’ll tell him to get a DNA test first and until then, he isnt to contact me.
Honestly. Being a single mom is the best thing that could have happened. And my son doesnt even realize he doesnt even have a dad.
You take it one day at a time. You have to be strong for the kids. Its amazing how strong a person can be when someone else is depending on them. Do everything you can and ask for help when you need it. Don’t hold on to the anger. Let it go. It won’t do any good. Cry it out in the shower. Be the best and strongest you that you can be. It gets easier. Promise
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Was difficult but I had to learn that I gotta do what I need to do to give my kids the upbringing I never got. I fail and win but more fails than wins…but i never give up and know my kids are more important and they deserve to see momma not crying and blaming herself for the volatility that was her relationship with her kids’ dad. I had to learn to love myself as well.
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I walked away 21 years ago. Best decision I ever made. He didn’t care at all. So I packed my shit… Sold what I could… And packed the rest in my car. Moved from CT to FL with my kids in the back and never looked back! I call it the taillight special! Raised my babes on FL and they’re all grown up now. Moving on was the best thing I ever did!
Not a single mom, but I have worked in repo…as far as the car goes I would absolutely contact your lender and explain the situation. Give them allll of his information: his number, his address, his family members info too. Get that car off you girl! What I can tell you as far as your babies is just love them up! It’s the little things they will remember when they are grown, so don’t stress it. As long as you got a roof over their head, food on the table, clean clothes on their back and they go to bed knowing their momma loves them you are doing great! Deep breath love you will get through this.
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I’m a single mom of three kids 23, 19 + 8. My ex wants nothing to do with the kids and there’s nothing I can do about his decision unfortunately. Luckily they have a great grandfather that fills in for a father. I just love them as much as I can and do everything I can for them and hope that I’ve done my best. I would definitely consult a lawyer about the issue with the car. See what your options are.
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Child support. Don’t call the police and report it stolen… go through the courts… make sure you have the upper hand on EVERYTHING! Surround your child (children) with positive male role models. Whatever you do, when you date again, keep it private until you have a ring. And never, no matter what, talk badly about the other person who left. Hugs. If you ever need someone to talk to, PM me. I’ve dealt with about every single parent issue there is❤️
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Don’t want anything to do with the child and has the car??? I would definitely report it stolen!
Move on with your life and do the best you can for your kids. don’t talk crap to them about him because they will only resent you for that…Oh, and go get your car!
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Definitely talk to a family law attorney ASAP!!
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We have to be strong and try our hardest for them
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I upgraded my house left his crap there at the old one door wide open turned him into child support enforcement and called my attorney it states on the child support order per court and judge failure or disobedience is contempt of court so i turned him into the courts as well. His family is on board to so i hope that hoe bails him out​:joy:
If the car is in your name report it stolen.
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Ive been a single mom since i was 17 i dont know any other way
Do it for the love of your kids your appreciated very much by your kids unspokenly…they will appreciate it
Have the car picked up
All I can say is keep positive mind things will get better and look for someone to advice on what to do with the car situation. My first born my son his dad walked out on him basically when we split he was only 3mths old he was really never in his life my son is now 13 years old and I remarried and my son has the best dad ever!
Return the car and find other means of transportation. It’s hard, you’ll struggle, cry and suffer. But it gets easier. I have 4 and both dad’s abandoned them, but I’m still here. I’m still standing. Although I crumble sometimes, I pick myself up with the love and support of my kids and some family. Not much tho. Praying for you and all mom’s going through the struggle alone.
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For the vehicle, contact whomever is suppose to be getting the payments and let them know of the situation. See what they suggest and let you know where it stands on being repoed. If the title is in your name alone, you could always report it stolen and tell them who took it. The repo might tank your credit score, but in the end, you are far better off without him.
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You just do what you have to do. You get a job or several.jobs, and rent a couple rooms, and start over. My kids are the most important thing in my life. I’ve been both mom and dad for 47 years. I left him, when my son’s was 6 and my daughter was 3, we’ve grown up together, no child support, he still to this day has nothing to do with the kids. Now there are three grands and four greats, he doesn’t know them, his loss not mine. We survived.
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I got a lawyer #1. No way should you let them have a car that has anything to do with you, your credit and your child’s future. Also kids actually deal with this well if we are honest with them and are as kind as possible. Dont lie to cover up things. If the child wants to call, let them…even though you know the other parent wont answer ir return a voicemail. Eventually you and your child will grow and move on in a loving and healthy way. The best revenge is to live a beautiful life.
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I loved being a single mom… and it was not difficult at all. If you keep saying it is, it will be. when you have a good schedule and everything flows it just works. I had a great work schedule, brought my kids to daycare, went to work, picked them up after. On my time, alone, no one else. Get your car back, if it’s in your name it shouldn’t be an issue.
had 5 when she left did what I had to do to make it work it was hard but we got thorough it thankfully he older ones were responsible kids and helped with the little ones
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My daughters dad is a drunk whom lost all rights to her… my son’s dad chooses Meth over his children. It’s a struggle and you will make mistakes, but every day you wake up with your held held high knowing that those kids will grow up and know you were strong and you gave them everything you had! Also repo the car!!!
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Honestly, that part is tough, but when they get sober and come back and you have to share your child again after 2-3 years and try to trust them with your entire world again is worse. Enjoy your baby and hope you never see them again.
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With the car thing there really isn’t much you can do but take them to court to try to get it if its in both your name if it’s in yours call it in stolen… an for the single parent thing it’s hard but I kinda just do it… and they are old enough now to see his true colors
First the kids need to be protected from this BS . Kids are smarter than you think. If he is not doing what a Dad should. You don’t need to point it out . The kids will see this very shortly. And pick your self up move on will a smile on your face. I have a niece who has 2 boys there Dad would quit his job if support informant would find him. She worked fulltime and cut hair and did perm’s at home. To this day she is a class act. Her boys are in there late 30s they see there Dad 1 or 2 time a year.
I love my babies everyday with everything I am and can be. I make sure they have always been told that their father not being in their life is not their fault but his, I have made sure that over the years they have seen me make efforts for him to be in their lives. I have done my best over the years to make sure they have positive men in their lives that they can count on and turn to when they feel the need. My oldest is now 20, he has told me on a few occasions that he appreciates the things I have done for him. He does not, at this time, care to have a relationship with his bio dad, but he knows if that ever changes I support his decision. His younger brothers have made the choice (they are teens) to allow their bio to contact them but they unfortunately have learned not to count on him for much. However once they were old enough to have an opinion I put the ball in their court and have allowed them control over communication. It hasnt always been easy, I have dried lots of tears, ad watched lots of hearts break. But over time my boys have seen the truth and they know who they can count on. I have never stopped allowing him the chance and I never will. That relationship isnt mine to control…
Report the vehicle stolen. Move on from him. I was a single mom for 2 almost 3 years. Now I’m with the love of my life and I am expecting baby #2.
I’ve done the single parent thing for 15 years now, it’s been an experience (though not an easy one) my son turned 22 yesterday. It’s been 9-1/2 years since his last contact with the mother (her decision not his) no calls, no birthday cards, no Christmas cards, no hello, no good bye, no kiss my ass, no go to hell, nothing! Don’t ever trash-talk the missing parent no matter how much you want to. Answer their questions only with tempered honest facts, not your opinions.
Will you lose sleep, Yes. Will life seem unfair, it is, just get over it & keep going forward. It may take awhile but see the advantage of these actions.
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If car in your name report as stolen, take insurance off report as stolen, make sure to file for child support as they track by social security. If he owns anything put a lien on it, file for a permanent stay away order and do an internet search to track. If you get close enough, throat punch.
I raised three children without their dad. Got a lot of help from my mom and dad. Keep telling your kids we are going to do this together. We are family and well always be together
Put your big girl pants on. Walk tall take care of you child Trust and believe in God. You will make it
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Single parent just keep ur head high they will be days that u think u can’t go anymore but u can it will be hard but it’s not impossible just keep think u have a beautiful child that’s looking up to u and it’s the other parents loss that they don’t get to watch the child grow up and they get to miss out on it as far as the vehicle I would report it stolen and let the police deal with it
When you do your best ,God will do the rest.He knew where we would be before we got there.
You have to learn to love yourself, stop caring about what he loss (Like the kids) or took (like the car, and your heart)… ( the bank will eventually repo it) and he is without a vehicle. With Christ, this is just a dark season, and you will survive and so will the kids. You will be okay. Take the high road with everything. Write it down, you will not remember. Pay the bills on property you use. Record it. Let your support group help you, seek counseling and a representative/ free law help. Even if you don’t file have the ducks ready. My ex. ( who is now deceased) spent 5 years destroying my will to live. You will push through for your kids, and enjoy life all the more on the other side, no matter what it looks like, it is better than the place you are or were. I read the Bible and prayed and He heard my cries. Sometimes all I could do was repeat, He holds his beloved in the storm, He is holding me.
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Find a wood chipper, it’s harder to find the body
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If the car is in your name, you can take it from him. Take law enforcement with you and proof it is in your name. Sell it and pay it off if you are not upside down on it.
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Let him go, take the car back. If the car is still in your name sell it or get somebody take over payments on it.
It happens everyday…I don’t need anything from them
Report the vehicle stolen if in your name!
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Get a lawyer, pronto! They don’t care.
You are stronger than you think
Call your lender and explain the situation. Tell them you don’t have car under possession and that he won’t give it back and won’t make payments. They’ll tell you what steps to take, they may have it repo. It’s very important for you to do this now because it will affect your credit and being a newly single mom you’ll need that credit. Many guys walk away from their kids all the time I’m so sorry you’re going through that but don’t focus on him not being there and focus on you being there for your kids. The kids will only remember that you were there for them to keep doing your thing and chin up
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If the car is in your name I would get it back…the legal way so it doesn’t cause drama that isn’t needed and as for them not wanting anything to do with the child it’s their loss. I’m in that situation now when I divorced my ex he didn’t want anything to do with the 2 kids and hasn’t seen/talked to them since 2017 and it’s his loss not the kids
You are beautiful, you are strong and you are not alone! You are loved! Report the car to the dealership/police before he wrecks on your insurance or something. Take care of your children, don’t talk negative about him around or near the children. They’ll figure it out for themselves in time. Do the best you can by the children. I’ll be praying for your little family!
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I’m a product of this situation and at 40yrs old i can tell you this…don’t bad mouth him to your kid(s) they’ll figure things out for themselves in their own time, in their own way…don’t lie to them either…when they ask you why he doesn’t want to see them, why he doesn’t love them, what they did wrong, what they can do to make him love them…be honest, but don’t bad mouth him in the process. I know that seems impossible, but it is possible and your children will thank you for it down the road…as for the car, if it’s in your name you can repo it yourself, if it’s in both names, contact the lender ASAP and advise them of the situation. Also, reach out to friends and family for support for both you and your kid(s), you’d be amazed at how family support can influence the outcome long term…
I can’t help you with the vehicle part. The other part happened to me, twice. You just bust your ass to raise your kids. It’s the deadbeats loss 100%.
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Report it to the police get court papers to return the car to you and fight like hell to protect the kids I went through I had fought like a bitch lost my car job and almost my home … and emergency custody papers
If the car is in your name & he has procession of it he stole it. Cops aren’t going to treat it like a normal theft though. They won’t go over & take it from him. If you take it & he calls the cops they’ll arrest you for theft. True story. Contact a lawyer at legal aide. Hopefully they’ll be able to guide you. A repo can mess up your life.
Move on with your life & make him see you don’t need him. Being a single mom is hard but it’s worth every second of it I love my kiddos enough for both parents & I make sure they know they are very well loved. Just make sure you take care of you also because if Mommy isn’t happy or healthy she can’t make sure babies are & they feel negative vibes. Hang in there it gets better
Sounds like you need to hire a attorney.
Weird. This EXACT thing happened to me. I can help ya but inbox me…or look up personal repossession