Why on earth is there a wait list for tubal ligation? That is what’s confusing me. I’ve never heard of such a thing…
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You are a grown adult and if you are a responsible and don’t ask nobody for nothing. Then don’t worry about what anybody has to say about you having another baby! Each baby is a blessing and if your parents are not supporting you then why are they worried about how many babies do you have!
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43 last one is 3 and a half. My kids are pretty spaced out except two of them. I said I was going to tie my tubes way before my 5th but I never did it. When I had my last I did when I had my c section. I am so done. I did not enjoy my pregnancy I had so many say you’re to old your already struggling as it is what were you thinking etc I felt so distant and disconnected from his pregnancy. I felt ashamed and didn’t post much about it or even really talk about the pregnancy to many people. I hope you have support somewhere because the shame didn’t end when I had him. It got worse! I had (TW) I had secretly wished that the my son would of stopped breathing by some odd chance God would of taken him back. It was a guilt I hid from my doctor for several months before being honest with her. That is how much ashamed I was for having him. Such a horrible guilt to carry around and it lasted for some time. I hope you have help somewhere! Now he is three and a half my kids are 26…17…15…9…3 two grandkids 3 and half and two months old.
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If you are pregnant have the baby, I did at 42 ,and he’s 25yrs. now and full of life gave me two of the sweetest grandsons 5 and 2 yrs. I’m so glad I didn’t miss out on him❤️
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I am 37 with an 18 year old, 11 year old and 11 month old. I thought I was crazy for having another. My 18 year old is super responsible and out on his own. My 11 year old son has autism and is a handful even more so now going through puberty. It’s rough. But I wouldn’t change having my baby for anything. I feel like I’m a better mother with more knowledge and patience. You’ve got this!
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Mom of 6 here. After 2 it literally doesn’t matter how many you have, the chaos is the same from 2-20 except they all have playmates & BF’s for life. I honestly thought it was easier with multiples than with 2
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Why avoid them? It’s your choice. Children are a blessing and joy. They should be happy to be having a grand baby. Heck I raise all mine . If another were to come along than that would be fine to. Be happy and enjoy your pregnancy.
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If they can’t be supportive for you, you don’t owe them the news. They will find out eventually, no need to be stressed the entire pregnancy. Or, tell them, and simply say if they can’t be happy please just stay in your lane. Dont answer calls.
And be happy! It’s another tiny human to adore and love, qnd another sibling for your kids. Big families make holidays amazing!
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Have that gift God gave to especially. You are special and this child will be the one who will pick you up when you fall. I know for sure.
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I am 27 with a 4,5, and 6 year old. I thought we were done years ago and just had our 4th last week. It was the smoothest pregnancy and my first csection which went better than I could have ever imagined. My recovery has been awesome as well and she is so loved by the “big kids.” You can do this mama!
I’m 33 with 4 kiddos, & one on the way. 30 weeks along so far. Everything will be ok. This will be my 5th c section. & getting a tubal as well. Do not worry what other people (especially your parents) think. It’s super hard, I know. Once you let yourself stop caring what anyone has to say, you will be a lot happier.
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Omg! Who
Cares what your parents think. Don’t even worry about them for a second! So exciting. Look at it like this…there is a reason you were on the wait list and got the call after you found out about little #4. You’ve got this! Much love to
You. 
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I’m blunt so I just say it… I’d just say it like it is… listen mom& dad … I’m having another. Bby & I don’t really care what u think abt it… your either here 
for this or out… no excuses… sometimes u got to love family far away
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This so sounds like me. I went into depression. But God gave me a daughter I have always wanted.
His ways are not ours😘. Hugs to you.
I was done after my first and my bf was done after his two oldest daughters. We ended up getting pregnant and having a boy and decided we were officially done. 5 days before his scheduled vasectomy i found out we were expecting again… we were blessed with another boy and honestly what anyone has to say doesnt matter. Its your baby and your life. Honestly i was terrified to add another baby when my youngest was 16 months but its been the smoothest transition so far.
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My 4th was a surprise also. I cried at the time. She is now 29 and an amazing artist working as a scenic painter in a theater company. She has been my ‘sunshine’ in my life. It was really tough at the beginning as my husband was underemployed and we had no insurance, but I so blessed to have her as my daughter. Looking back, one of my greatest joy’s came during a time of great difficulty.
Every baby is a blessing they say and it’s true. Just had my 5th and I’m soaking in all the firsts this time because it really does go so stinking fast and then you miss it! You got this!! 4 is easy peasy 
i was in the same boat. always got the “oh” you have “5 kids??” when people ask how many i have. i was always nervous to announce a pregnancy. But you know what? i wouldn’t change it for the world and they are each a blessing. Bless you and your family. don’t let others judgments steal your joy, that’s what i would have changed now if i could go back
I don’t have multiple yet. I’m pregnant with my 2nd. But, I’ve read a lot of conversations on mom groups. One thing I think is great advice was having the older children help with the baby. That way they don’t build resentment towards new baby. And 4 is an even number lol now there’s 2 middle children and they can share that 
My oldest was 6 months old when I got pregnant with my second child, Kids grew up, started school. When I was almost 38, found out I was pregnant with our third… I was shocked as I thought I had my period down to a science,… surprise. My kids are now, 37( well, she will be tomorrow), 35 and almost 26. The youngest will turn 26 a month and 20 days before his brother turns 36. Every baby is a blessing, and anyone who doesn’t see this , can keep their thoughts to themselves. Good luck.
I have four! 2 girls! 2 boys! Routine and organization and flexibility is key. Have fun! I was a single parent through most of their growing up years, we made the best memories just having fun together. And the tough times, they will have you and each other. They are now 23, 19, 18, and 15. 
I was done after 2 and wanted a tubal ligation. Well I wasn’t able to get it due to me being confused and thinking they wouldn’t do it because I was still pretty young (found out to late that they would’ve), then I lost my insurance. 4 years later I got pregnant again and was pretty upset by it but turns out he was the easiest and sweetest little baby ever. He’s a teenager now so he’s not quite as sweet but I’m still happy I was blessed with him after I was so adamant that I did NOT want another kid.
Dont be afraid of the c section i had 2 16 months apart my second I had a tubal it definitely made recovery more painful but other than that no difference from my first and i wouldnt have my babies ant other way
I am 37 and just had my 4th. It seems like a handful at first. But I adapted well. I just make sure all my kids have the same doctor and keep up on my planner. My oldest is a senior in high school. You got this!
After my youngest daughter’s second divorce, she fell in love with a wonderful man. She was 38 and he was 39 when they found out she was pregnant. She had a 13 year old from her first marriage. They got married last year. The older brother was thrilled and is attentive and doting. The step father and he get along great, and they are happy. You never know what the future holds. Just think your decision out carefully. Bless you! 
I was 34 and a single parent when I unexpectedly got pregnant with my 4th while on birth control (paraguard iud )
My kids were 8,6 and 5 when their baby brother was born… My daughter wasn’t thrilled to have another brother at first but soon came around after he was born just 8 days before Christmas in 2014…i signed the tubal ligation papers twice… Once at 35wks and then again the day he was born
I knew I was most definitely done having kids but my little guy saved my life… My family and friends adore my kids but they’re glad I’m done
Thats so crazy to me that you are on a wait list. I got in within a week of mentioning it to my doctor and I had my surgery Friday. Good luck to you mamas!
I only have 2 kids but my last one was when I was 28 (also unexpected) I did notice a difference in what my body could handle which seemed crazy to me lol first time I was 20 and my body generally handled everything pretty well. But at 28 when I hit that last trimester my back was waaaaay more sore than the first time. So my advice would be to listen to your body and take it easy. If you feel like you need to sit down, do it. I can’t really speak on anything else because I only have two kids lol
I’m going through the same thing, I’m 30 thought I was going through early menopause surprise I’m pregnant🙄 my dad will not be impressed so I’m avoiding him like the plague!! I just know how negative he’ll be about it and I can’t handle that in my mental state right now. Third one for me and never planned on having more but just trying to look at it as a blessing that maybe I didn’t know I needed, my kids are still in shock over it but we’re doing the best we can! Good luck momma!
My 4th was a birth control surprise- lol but she is the BEST little thing.
Everything happens for a reason, and it all works out one way or another. It’s chaos… lol my 3rd and 4th are only 11 months apart but it’s all good. Just pray and keep pushing on. 
it’ll be okay ! Hugs
Aww, I had my 8 year old at 31. I had already gotten used to the idea that I wasn’t going to have any more so she was a complete surprise and my 4th living (I had 2 miscarriages) she was a god send. Her older brothers and sisters adore her even with the big age gaps. Our others are 22, 21, 17 and almost 17 (I have a 17 year old step child)
I have five, I stopped noticing the difference after three. My husband and I want a big family and are expecting number six currently. Honestly, maybe I’m lucky but all my kiddos naturally just kinda shifted to one schedule together on their own and it’s not bad. I had one emergency c section and the procedure isn’t bad just the recovery sucks. I recommend getting a stomach band bc that was my life saver into helping me move without being in utter agony afterwards. You’re gonna do great mama, you got this
I hope u can get a tubal with your surgery . I think I read that right. Good luck.
You are allowed to feel absolutely everything! Timing is insane… seems like meant to be. I’m always a believer in things happen for a reason but 100% pro choice in pretty much every aspect of life.
Sit with it, think about it pros, cons, how life would be etc and I think it will come to you!!
You’re a mom of three (I am too) you’re already strong! You’re young… you’ve got this any which way you take it!
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Just worry about you and your family, if they’re not paying the bills they don’t matter that much. Stay positive I heard 4 is easier than 3. Love your babies don’t worry about the rest 
I was surprised and blessed with twins last year at 36 years old. They are 4&5 for us. I got my tubes removed during the csection. We started over from scratch. My oldest is 20 years old. Wasn’t planned but I couldn’t imagine life without them. You got this.
Congratulations
I am a whoopsie baby
The last of four children
And the only one of 4 to have my own children
My Mom use to say “I don’t know what I would do without you” RIP Momma
And my 94 year old Dad, tells me that every time I leave him
So…
Congratulations and welcome #4. You’ll be glad you did:heart:
Confused at the real question at hand here. If you don’t want the child I would gladly adopt it considering I just had my entire insides removed due to cancer and can’t have any. If your parents aren’t supportive of you or them why did their opinion matter? If you just need an ear to vent to feel free to reach out, I know how it is to feel alone in certain matters.
2.5 years ago I was supposed to be “fixed” but I delivered my twins elsewhere when my water broke. I became pregnant last year, had him this year, I have 3 under 3 and also a 14 yr old son. 4 littles, they’re a blessing but it’s hard. Take it day by day.
I found out I was pregnant with my 5th daughter right before FINALLY getting the call for mine. 
after the initial shock it got better. We were all excited.
I tried for years to get “fixed” they kept saying no…now I have a 15 month old. All of a sudden I can have it whenever I want it 
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I had my last at 35 years old. #3 
Everything always works out. Be excited and just know that 10 years from now you’ll be so grateful that this little boy or girl is your child. Congratulations mama!!
My parents where long done with me having my 4th too but 8 years later surprise … number 5 comes along … I’m 35 and on the waiting list too … I didn’t care this time round what any one thought I didn’t even know how I truly felt either but I’ve had her and I don’t regret that I did … she’s amazing and can’t imagine our world without her. My parents learnt to accept that they have another grandchild … do what u feel is best for u not any one else … u need to live ur life for u not for ur parents not for anyone else. Good luck in what ever u decide to do
I have 7 all 2 years apart except the last 2 they are 14 months couldn’t get my tubes tied at the hospital as it was a catholic hospital and against their policy
I had twins when I was 18. That was something. Their “dad” chose to not be a father and left me alone with them. If it wasn’t for my mom I don’t think I could have done it. Now I’m 28 with 4 kids. The twins were difficult in the beginning but they’re a blessing. They’re good kids now and it’s so cool watching them grow into the people they were meant to be.
Well I’m 29 and expecting my 4th in a couple weeks. Kinda my fifth since we have had custody my bonus daughter for 7 years. So I have a 13yo, 9yo, 5yo, 2 yo and I’m due soon. I actually didn’t plan having so many kids. While it may be hectic some days my heart is fuller then it’s ever been. I wouldn’t trade any of them for anything. I had my 9yo on the depo, my 5yo on the mini pill and my 2yo I hadn’t even gotten my cycle back and was breastfeeding a toddler so they were all surprise babys person. The ones we actually tried for did not make it. Everytime I found out I was overwhelmed and emotional. So I’d say soak it in relax and think on it. Hormones really can mess with you
With my 2nd last child I had a c-section and a tubal at the same time. Everything went great was sore 4 a little while actually slept n a recliner 4 bout a month cuz couldn’t get n 2 the bed I was sleeping n. My daughter slept n a laundry basket on a pillow beside me! Just breath it only matters how u feel bout everything. Take it one day at a time. You got this!
I’m getting my tubes tied after my next pregnancy. I have 2 preteens and 2 year old twins. I basically lost my family support after I had the twins. I’m pregnant again but I don’t talk to my family anymore so don’t have to worry about that. I’ve always had c-sections due to a failed induction. C-sections it takes longer for your milk to come in and obviously the healing process is different. Don’t worry about your family’s approval. Practice boundaries with them. In reality it’s not their place to say anything. It’s not like you’re a teen mom.
You don’t need a c-section to have tubes tied after having a baby ask if they can take you back after having baby and do a key hole surgery which is less invasive and you recover faster
I’m sure you’ll love your 4th amazing little just as much. Your parents will just have to accept it. Just tell them you got blessed with one more, and that even though your family grew unexpectedly you’re happy to get one more to love. And you’re right, it’s not their concern at the end of the day.
I had a c-section and it wasn’t so bad. It was quick, but the healing after is longer. If you’ve ever taken care of a cut it’s just like that. Wash it gently in the shower, give it time to dry, keep a gauze pad on it, & it heals up before you know it. As for lots of doctors appointments, maybe you can arrange for less of them. Aside from spaced apart routine growth/heartbeat check-ups, tell them you want as little appts as possible. They might get where you are coming from & accommodate a more hands off approach.
I had a 12 and 14 year old when I found out I was pregnant with my third. My ex left me because in his words, he didn’t want to start all over again (we split up after being together 18 years)
I was TERRIFIED to tell my parents (and to raise another baby all on my own) as they helped me raise my other two since birth pretty much. But they were thrilled to have another grand baby and we couldn’t imagine our lives without him!! The older two really stepped up to help me out and I am forever grateful for them!! Your parents will be alright girl!!! Hang in there!! You can do this
Enjoy every minute of your last pregnancy! Do all things special like photos for maternity hell even have a baby shower if you want to or small get together ! Do everything you never got the chance to or if you did get the chance do it again anyways you’ll be glad you did!
I am 40 & ended up unexpectedly pregnant with my 4th while waiting for a tubal ligation that I have been advocating to have for 2 years due to MH! Currently 18 weeks. Not sure what state you’re in but it doesnt sound like you’re leaning towards abortion. It’s not okay that women have to jump so many hoops to get stitched & fixed. My current provider has sticky notes on every paper in my chart that I am to be provided a tubal ligation upon delivery. I’m in California so we have a 30 day consent law for women & we are not allowed to be provided with the option to start the 30 days until a minimum of 28 weeks. I’m patiently waiting…
You know abortion or adoption are perfectly valid choices? Apart from your parents’ judgement, I don’t quite get the feeling you’re on board with this pregnancy… will you be able to financially, emotionally and physically meet this child’s needs?
It’s OK to discuss options with your GP. 
God sent u this baby…just breathe .…put it in God’s hands…don’t worry what people say…will pray for u and hope all comes out good…hugs
Just don’t tell your parents and see if they notice you have an extra kid 
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Is being a few months shy of 30 supposed to raise a flag or was that just a detail lol? I was 36 with my first and 40 with my second. 30’s is becoming the new average of when people start having kids. Your not old if that was what you were worried about with age.
I know the feeling of not wanting to tell your parents. Been there. They were shocked at first, and the shock quickly turned into anticipation for her arrival. Now they love her to death.
If your ready get your tubal. I wish I had. Good luck and congratulations
Girl I’m right there with you!!! I absolutely did NOT want anymore kids and then found out I was pregnant with our FIFTH. I’m now 8 months pregnant and I’ve come to be very excited and can not wait to meet our last baby
I had mine done right after my last baby. Ask for them to do it right after. If they won’t, I suggest a good birth control until they can
It isn’t just the female who can have her tunes tied. Men can have this done also. Give it some thought.
Why you worried about your parents your grown. If they are supporting you and your growing family it’s none of their business
“Unexpectedly pregnancy” doesn’t JUST happen… either you’re not on birth control, birth control failed or your man has a weak pull out game… #isaidwhatisaid
its your blessing dont be afraid of telling anyone i fell pregnant at 35 and i dont regret it at all
I just had my 5th baby in August this year. My oldest is 10, other ages of kids are 6, 4(almost 5), 2, & almost 2 mos, nothing really changed after having my 3rd, its all the same for me lol, extra kiddos to get ready but its not a problem. I’m 25 years old & married. Had my first when I was 15 and #5 was my last at age 25. I chose birth control over tubes tied because the birth control was more effective, waiting for hubby’s insurance card because he plans on getting fixed. It’ll all be ok mama!
I would just be honest with your parents and tell them you don’t need negativity or stress you just simply wanted them to be aware.
I mean if it’s like that, I dunno why it’s any of their business. Just don’t tell them, let them find out through someone else or when they run into you with the baby
I’m confused about the transition part. You mention you have 3 kids already. So adding another one would be any different than adding the other ones/incorporating a new baby each time before? Or, do you mean you’re asking about parenting tips for multiples as in you’re having twins this time?
As far as your parents, tell them whenever you feel like it. As you said it’s not their concern that you’re having another one. If they’re the unsupportive type then just let them get the announcement when everyone else does. I wouldn’t worry about that much at all.
I’ve never had a c-section but my sister had two of them. You’ll def need someone around to help with your other children and you. You’ll be quite sore for a good bit and not be able to move around like before (outside of the mandatory get up and move moments). But that’s only if your body handles it like hers did.
I have 5 boys and couldn’t be happier! I had my first son at 19 and my last son at 37, you will be fine and congratulations 
I have four and I had a tubal immediately following my fourth. It’s hard, but you will be ok. Just take it one day at a time.
Biggest issues going from 3 to 4 is that U need a bigger car but if U already have that the by should be fine. Congratulations.
A. Who cares what your parents think? Unless they are financially supporting you or your children they have no say. Ultimately, they should only provide support for you and their opinion as parents, of course but they cannot flat out tell you that you cannot have more children. You are an adult. B. I’m 31 as of last month. I’m currently pregnant with my 6th and 1 angel baby. I have been a stay at home mom for over a year now. To say I am stressed out to the max daily is an understatement. Financially, physically, emotionally I am drained. But it is entirely possible mama. Have patience with them kiddos (homework, chores, etc.) and have patience with yourself ( household chores, laundry, dishes, etc ) Sometimes when I get too stressed I step outside for a minute. I don’t drink (preggers) and I don’t smoke. I step away to collect myself and come back inside. Also stop for a moment and just look at your kiddos. Like really, just look at them. They are your babies. Your children. You birthed them. Just stop all the turmoil of being a mother for 2 minutes and focus on how much you love them babies. Somehow it makes everything else seem so insignificant. Good luck, you got this.
This is a blessing and u dont need there approval and congrats and prayers
Hugs. It’ll be ok. Don’t tell them. Let the. Tell you.
Tell people when you feel ready. If it’s still early on it’s best to wait imo.
If you do not rely on your parents for financial assistance or any kind of help financially I don’t see why it is their business not to be rude.
4 does even out the number so everyone has a mate. There were times a 4th would have been nice. No one rides alone.
That last paragraph tho… that part hit my soul. I know that feeling.
I would highly recommend any considering a tubal research Post Tubal Ligation Syndrome.
Add a little more water to the soup, you got this
Had my surprise at 39…found out the week I was supposed to have my tubal scheduled
Just a friendly reminder that you have options mama 
God bless and protect you. sue
I get it mama. I get it. Sending hugs.
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You’ve already got 3. The 4th really doesn’t make much difference
If you don’t want/aren’t prepared for/can’t handle a 4th, there are options.
I can’t believe the long waiting list, that’s crazy!!!
God has a plan for you
So don’t tell them
Unexpectedly pregnant??? Wuts that??
This is my surprise.#4. I was 38 and was 2 days away from my tubes being tied. I found out on a sunday and was scheduled tuesday morning. She is so great. With 3 kids your life is crazy. 4 is just another hamburger on the grill. You are going to be fine. Edited to add that she is litterally the best thing that ever happened to me.
Literally was in the same spot as you. I’m now 18 weeks pregnant. I KNEW we were done. Had everything set up but God had other plans. I was a mess when I found out! I cried for weeks didn’t know what I wanted to do. But once we told our kids they were so excited and that’s what made me feel better. It’s hard but you will get through it (if you choose to) I was on the fence for weeks about what I wanted to do. Now I feel better and just look at the positive of it all! Good luck❣️
I love when people say "unexpected " bwahahaha, you had unprotected sex, what did you think you were going to get,? a toaster?? lol
babies are precious, and as long as you are mentally, physically, and financially able to care for your child, it doesn’t matter what anyone else thinks…
I see a lot of people saying who cares what your parents think… But a lot of us care. I didn’t tell my.mom until I couldn’t hide it anymore and she was more upset that I hid it from her than just told her. Your going to need all the help and support you can get after csec. Just rip that bandaid off.
With my 3rd and final i didnt tell those that were negative- basically anybody that was toxic i made it very clear they were THE LAST to know. When multiple people messaged me asking me why and playing hurt i just told them " why would i ever tell you anything anymore especially how toxic and rude and non supportive so this is the consequences of your own actions"
Are you a single mom? Is that why you’re worried? Do your parents help with the kids?
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Why on earth is there a waiting list that long??? I wanted one and 3 weeks later it was done. But that was after I was surprised with baby number 5. It wasnt easy, but my husband and I worked opposite shifts so we didn’t have to pay for childcare. When we couldn’t work opposite shifts, CCR&R paid most of childcare. It’s in every state. For lower income families. It was not easy but it was totally worth it.
Pregnancy is not unexpected.
Unexpected is having becoming parents over night to nieces/nephews.
When people have sexual intercourse there is a high probability of getting pregnant.
Should of took precautions if you didn’t want any pregnancies after a certain age.
Hats off to you. I only have 2 kids. I couldn’t do so many little ones running around. Do your parents help with babysitting or any of your financial needs.
I had my tubes done march 2019, fell pregnant 6 months after…
Congratulations Momma! You can do this. I was 42 when I had my first one and 45 when I had my second. I wouldn’t trade anything for them. You can do it! Your parents will come around. I’m sure of it