So he’s trying to guilt trip you? How about you work out 1 day a week for family day and 1 day a week for going out. Nobody needs to be going out every single day especially not right now
I have friends like most men. But there’s nowhere on earth I want to be but back beside my wife! Work takes up so much of your free time, I’m stingy as hell with what free time I do have and it all goes to my wife and daughters.
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The end part when you said 7 yrs older lol… sounds like a man child.
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Time for hubby to grow up! You don’t need another kid.
sorry but everyone needs times with friends Not 100% family I think maybe you should try seeing more of your friends
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Yeah this is a no go. He’s saying it that way knowing you will back down. This is not how you treat your spouse.
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That is why I am divorced. Married 10 years together for 16.
A little late to the program after 10 years.
Time to make a very BIG decision. Is this something you can continue to live with or not?
I think maybe you guys need some alone time
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Try to agree on a compromise but if that isnt possible…tell him to say bah bye to his friends. He has a wife & family FIRST & FOREMOST. 
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There needs to be a compromise. Close friends become FAMILY. You don’t not hang with a cousin just because they are single. So why should he cut off his single friends? Your choice to not have a social life should not be deflected on him to not have one. You will only make him want it more and less of you. Treat the friends as family. Compromise with this and then request he limit his outings and have defined family time. Marriage is give and take. You can not just expect him to do what you say because you said so. That is called mothering him. Now hearing him out then expressing your own concerns and you two finding a middle ground you are both ok with is adulting. Stop being his mom and start being his partner. Good luck to you.
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Read the book, “He’s Just Not That Into You” and you will definitely understand what is going on.
You’re wrong. His friends are probably more like family to him than his own extended family.
Stop him interacting and coming in close contact with your children.
Tell him to grow up! Family first.
Run! He is being selfish and puts himself first
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Make a sign for your front door that reads .
(your husbands name at the top)
Hgdtgghij’s
Club
House
Holidays, definitely family 1st. Any other time, within reason
Comprise. Equal time for each of you to do ur own thing.
Yeah that’s that lovely guilt trip. Idk why people do that but usually because they don’t like what they are hearing. I guess I’d tell my husband that’s not what I said. And explain that you want alone time as just you, him and the kids because you miss spending time with just him.
You’re not wrong, but maybe have him limit it to one day a week or so?
Tell him your friends can’t do what I do for you c how u get with them I will run back to mommy like your friends also tell him your not the fish in the sea boy
Can’t be with someone hoping or expecting change. Not everybody matures as they get older. Sounds like you knew what you were getting into.
Pick your battles wisely 
Id encourage you to listen to XO Real Marriage podcast. The book Real Marriage is great. Theres a sermon on it in The Real Faith App linked to Pastor Mark Driscoll
Sounds like my first husband
Sounds like a narcissist. Get out while you can, it’ll only get worse.
He’s selfish and doesn’t want to grow up. Either he needs new friends or no friends if he can’t decide that his wife and family come first.
Does OP not have any friends? The fact that any adult doesn’t “go out of their way to spend time with friends” tells me she most likely doesn’t have any. My partner and I have a child, own a home together. But we also have friends which we had 10 years+ before we ever met. We both have accepted and love each others’ friends because they have been so important in our lives. They are always invited over to our home for New Years or Super Bowl Sundays. My parents even had my partner’s friends over for dinner because we are all so close. The problem seems to be that OP has isolated herself from any relationship outside of family and relies solely on her husband’s attention. That is unhealthy and honestly I’d suggest seeking a therapist to understand why. What’s going to happen when your children are grown and you have zero relationships outside of your marriage? It’s okay to not want your house to be a frat house 24/7. Family comes first but it should never, ever be the only relationship you have in your life. Friends are essential to a happy life.
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He definitely needs to man up and spend less time with his friends. As far as I’m concerned, he has some growing up to do. Its ok to hangout with friends when you have a family. But he should have more family time than friend time. And if he’s not willing to do that, well theres not a lot you can do to change that. Except to leave him temporarily ( let him know what he missing) or permanently.
So let him tell HIS friends you don’t want them there ! It’s your home too. If they hate you for it, so be it !
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You sound very jealous, controlling and insecure. If I was him, id look for any reason to get the hell away from you too
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His ass needs to grow up
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You need to spank that little spoiled brat.
Talk to a marriage counselor together.
Yeah I went through it with my husband, I finally put my foot down and told his friend where to go and told my husband either he can live here with his wife and kids or go live with his fuck Buddy (his friend) their not really fuck buddies. But they were around each other like they were. He chose his wife and kids, he still See’s his friend every other day.
He is very immature and selfish.
That man will never grow up! His time with his inmature friends are more important to him. Please do you and your kids a favor throw his damn loser ass out. H is not a family man and your life will only get lonelier and more miserable! Good luck!
Rules shouldn’t be put in place! Respect of your family should come naturally. He is abusing his family by putting his friends first. I can’t believe how some of you are telling this person it’s her fault.
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If this is how it’s been for 10 years it’s not going to change now ? Talk to him maybe go out a couple of times a week then you do the same or get a babysitter and go out together? Tell him you’d like Christmas time with him and the kids …he’s got the life of a single man with you being home …he’s having his cake and eating it so stop with the cake !!
Yeah, you’re wrong. I’m sure he was like this before you. You can’t ask him to completely change his life. Sounds like one day out of the week he’s with friends and he can’t have that day. Telling him he can’t have his friends over is like treating like a child.
Just because you’re a parent doesn’t mean you can’t have friends and hang out with your friends just saying … I’m a mom of three and one on the way and three stepchildren and I have plenty of time for my family and friends and so does my husband you don’t quit wanting to have fun when you’re a parent as long as you can do both be a good parent and still have friends it’s okay
My friends literally ARE my family…is that maybe how his world is too? I mean I have family but my relationships with them are not super tight…they have had little impact over the last 15 years…so I invite friends to holidays and special things because THOSE are the people I love and want around…?
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Not after ten years together. Its time to be a family
She’s clearly a control freak.
ummm these are known friends to you since before you got married and they gonna be around when and if you leave so slow down and relax this ain’t a road you should go down and stop because that alone will cost you much more…you got a good man and like your marriage then breath and let hjm be you are not his mother and when you start acting like it well it won’t end well…his friends darling are not yours to decide those are his friends the same ones that will go against you any way they can girl stop
Choose your battles. Is this the battle you want your marriage to die on? You chose him; you married him and now you want to change him to behave like you. If he has made it clear this is a battle he is digging in on, it falls to you to make a choice. You have three choices (IMO) 1. stay and deal, 2. continue to fight and be miserable, 3. leave and divorce. All marriages are require concessions from both sides; the big question is, how important is this one to you? Good luck from someone whose been married for 25 yrs.
I watched something similar on Dr.Phil and he told the husband he needed to grow up and take care of his family first before worrying about friends, drinking, playing video games ect. Its ok to have friends but family should come first. Communication is key with this situation.
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I would be livid if my man wanted me to ditch my friends. Friendships that last after having kids and losing yourself into the “family life” are rare. At least he is trying to incorporate both. There are plenty of guys that escape the household and are out all the time with friends INSTEAD of being home. My 1 friend is invited to EVERY thing— she’s family. Blood or not. I think holidays are for spending time with ALL loved ones… friends included. Also, he wouldn’t be able to guilt you if you didn’t think you’re wrong. Otherwise you’d say— tell your friends I said what I said-/ period! And wouldn’t care what they think
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imo just because you prefer it … doesn’t mean he needs to also. Some ppl need to socialize outside the home and this is perfectly fine. Yes , family first but imo friends are important!
I enjoy my ladies days-nights- wkends . Imo , I think its unhealthy to just be home with the family 365 days . its a unfair expectation.
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Why u trying to control him sounds like hes married a control freak if I got told this by you I would tell you to take a run and jump off a very short pier
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My husband is this way, too. It used to drive me INSANE! But I learned to pick my battles. He was raised with 4 siblings and about 20 cousins and all their friends over all the time, always something going on. I was not. It was just us, almost never had cousins or other family over. And I’m a very introverted person so I would get anxious with so many people always around. It was basically culture shock for me. I explained sometimes I just wanted “us” time and time for myself to breathe without someone over and he gives that a lot more now than before (we have been together 10 years now). But still calls buddies or cousins or other family over all the time to eat dinner, grill out, ride four wheelers, or just hang out for no reason. If it is something that bothers you, he should compromise and respect that by giving you “family” time. But he shouldn’t have to completely change his lifestyle just because he has a family now …
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Jeeez you sound like a dream youll give out if he goes to theres
Yes, if he didn’t want to stay home and be a family man , he shouldn’t have gotten married and had children. He’s wants to eat his cake and keep it too. A wife and kids at home but run around with the unmarried Buddies. That wouldn’t work with me. I would sit him down at the kitchen table and would I tell him and then if he didn’t change, I would.
I disagree that if he was like this before kids then you shouldn’t expect him to change. When you get married and have children, life and priorities change! Family is first always. It doesn’t mean friends can’t be in the picture at all, but grow up. You changed your life and rightly so. He should do the same.
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I’m the opposite. My husband is perfectly content being home and never going out or having friends. I love getting out of the house, I love girls trips, I love hanging out with my bestie and having her over. My bestie came over for Christmas because she couldn’t go to her family, we work in healthcare and are too much of a risk to her older relatives. If my family needs me, then I put them first always. But as much as I love them, I need time away from them too. I need time to myself and to do the things I enjoy because that is how I decompress. My husband understands that and he SUPPORTS that. If it bothers you, then have a talk about spending more time with just his family. But do not expect him to not want friends or a social life just because you don’t want those things.
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My sister and her husband were the first to have kids out of their friends, well they still had them over alot. Im sure it probably got annoying at times but now they all have kids and the kids call them uncles and their kids cousins. I even call them my brothers cause I was so little when i met them. I say set out a day each week or a few days each week for just family, so that yall can meet in the middle so no one feels like they are having to lose something.
He never “grew up!” He needs to put “family first” since he made the decision (and vow) to get married and have kids. Good luck, maybe give him a “night out” with friends, but not at your house.
When my daughter was born I expected her fathers priorities to change - I was wrong. I was wrong because he didn’t “change” he was exactly who I married. Since I disagreed with his priorities - I divorced him. He just moved and our daughter asked him why he didn’t move closer to us (we live closer to his office as well) and he told her he lives close to his “friends” - I know divorce was the right choice for me as I didn’t want her growing up that way.
Not if he’s a grown up.
You can’t expect to give up meaningful friendships just because you don’t have any, but on that same note… he should always prioritize his family!
Try enjoying yourself more around your friends and allowing yourself to be a part.of it and then you might enjoy it more.
Childish. Selfish. He needs to grow up.