As someone who has worked in a bar, its not uncommon to see kids at a bar. I would see how late the party was. If its afternoon to early evening, then go and take the baby. No need to worry but if its late night, then I wouldn’t go. No one wants a baby screaming and crying. Its a buzzkill. I dont think they would have a party in the bar directly but in the party room.
I’m just wondering why your husband can’t go alone and why you feel like you can’t stay home with the baby and him go and enjoy the party?
Sports bar and grill is okay and straight up bar no thank you
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Take the baby to the damn birthday, its not that serious.
where we live we actually take our kids to parties at the breweries bc they have activities and fun jumps for kids, never had an issue
Not bringing your infant to a bar for a gathering during a global pandemic is your right. Send a gift and card if you can. You don’t owe an explanation to anyone over what’s most comfortable for you.
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Girl we are always going to our local bar for family dinner and pool. I have 5 kids from 3 to 15 that all go!
Depends…is it like a membership bar with a hall rental that they’re hosting the party in? Is there smoking allowed in the bar? Like if they’re all just going out to get drinks in celebration of a birthday then I would say no. But if they’re renting a hall and there will be other small children with food, soda/water and it’s in a no smoking area then I don’t see the problem with that.
As long as it’s non smoking, I don’t see the problem. Obviously if the bar doesn’t allow kids it’s a no. And depending on the time of the party but that would be the case no matter where it is.
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So you plan on never leaving the baby for any given amount of time, until you’re done breastfeeding? Yuck. Get the pump. Some insurance companies even provide them through coverage. Pump some milk and let dad take the baby, you stay home, because trashy. Yet throwing in facts of how you’ve helped them in the past, is trashy.
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Was it a bar with a restaurant, a place like Dave and Busters or family owned? If there is smoking then that’s a hard no, but I do think we need more info.
I wouldn’t want to be in a bar while breastfeeding and taking care of a lil baby. So I wouldn’t go either.
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I think that we need to hear more about the situation to be able to answer your question and give you our advice.
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We used to go to the tiltnkilt after my brothers hockey/lacrosse games:joy: All the parents and kids. Looking back it was such a dingey place and quite inappropriate but us kids didn’t care nor notice- they had arcade machines and dads rootbeer:ok_hand:t2:
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I guess it really depends… I’m in a small town… having kids in the bar isn’t a big deal during the day… they serve food. And if it’s a party at a bar for children then it’s more likely not an issue. However if it’s at night or when the party crowd comes, or it’s a shady bar then I’d have a problem. But if you feel it’s wrong, then that’s your choice. He might not like or understand it.
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Two questions come to mind. Are they are going for a sit down meal? Then it’s ok to take baby/children. A lot of bars have a restaurant section. Do they plan on get wasted drunk? Then yes it is bad to take small children
Thought no miners in bars guess times change
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I would say no as well a bar is not for kids and there are people drinking and smoking and with covid i wouldn’t risk it
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Maybe Im old fashioned but what kind of adult plans a childs birthday party at a bar?? Nope i wouldnt go. I wouldn’t be breast feeding in a bar with an infant either think pandemic (just saying) seem reading thru the comments some younger mothers have no problem taking their kids. Myself i didnt want to glorify such adult activities in front of my kids. Then throw in drinking and driving hmmm great lesson there. Is nothing for adults anymore? Exposing children to a room full of intoxicated adults seems wrong to me. Meaning a bar full of strangers, no telling what could happen. So hard NO.
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If you feel so very uncomfortable then absolutely do not do it. Go with your gut. If the family can’t respect your decisions then that’s on them. I currently I have my mother-in-law blocked simply because she can’t respect me and my decisions with my family.
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I do agree though bringing a child into an adult environment is not the best idea especially if people are going to be drinking. I personally wouldn’t want my child around a bunch of drunk people… But that’s just me…
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I think it should be up to what you are comfortable with. I think my biggest concern would be who and how many people are going to be there because of the virus and if they are doing the social distancing and masks. Of course, your baby can’t wear a mask.
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If it’s a bar a grill, and has a place for children and families, then I’d say it’s fine. But whether or not people agree with you, it’s your baby. It doesn’t matter what others say or think.
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I have no issue with children being in bars in a seated table area. Ever since the smoking ban, it has made those environments safer for kids.
Would I take my child to a hole-in-the-wall bar with loud ass music? No. I was pregnant with my one and only when Ohio banned smoking indoors and I got to enjoy going to karaoke and even watch some of my favorite local bands live without worrying about second-hand smoke creeping in.
I think it is a personal choice and you are NOT wrong for feeling the way you do. It is YOUR body, you made the child and nobody, not even the father, will ever have the protective instincts that you do. Piss on him for being such a jerk about it. Tell him to go by his damn self and you can stay at home and be comfortable.
I dont see anything wrong if u bring a child to a bar for a family member’s bday party.
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We don’t bring our daughter to any public setting, unless a immediate family gathering at someone’s home, as she can not wear a mask yet/still learning to wear one. I would say you have a huge pass here by stating you are concerned for the safety of your child as they are not of age to wear a mask.
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I’ve always thrown my children’s bday parties at our house with food and drinks. We’ve had parties at Breweries- they have the best food. Lots of family members have bday parties at bar and grill restaurants, bowling alleys where they serve alcohol. Doesn’t bother me one bit personally.
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I think it may be more then just the child being in the but also that she would need to breastfeed the baby there also in an open bar if a private room was not available, my self personally would not bring my child in to an open bar. if it was a bar and grill with a private room I would take mine but everyone is different and neither choice is wrong.
I think If the adults were drinking alcohol around a child’s party then I would feel uneasy about things tbh … ultimately it’s your decision and your thinking of your baby and whether it makes you uncomfortable
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Considering what’s going on in the world I wouldn’t care where the party was I wouldn’t be taking a child or going myself for that matter
Sounds like you are throwing it in your in-laws faces that you helped them. Having a baby in a bar, as long as it’s not known to be a rough bar in my opinion long as it’s for a birthday party, anniversary etc
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As the child’s mother and breastfeeding, it is ultimately up to you to attend or not. However, you asked for opinions so here is mine…I have been a bartender and on a few occasions had to take my kids to work with me until someone could come get them due to scheduling conflicts. I also took my kids to a 4th of July party one year at one of the bars I worked at. The bars were all non smoking inside and during the time my kids were there, they say at a table I could see from anywhere I was standing, and it was primarily daytime so there were no drunk customers. I have also worked during events where parents brought their children. As long as no one is drunk or out of hand, I personally see no issue with it for a short time period.
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I think beyond anyone’s opinion on whether or not it’s trashy, it’s your baby! Your choice. I don’t think I would bring a baby to a bar either.
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It depends on the type of bar, if its like a pub style bar with like tables and full menu or something id say its fine but if its like a corner bar that everyone goes to on a Friday night to get drunk then dont take the baby.
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I think it is a personal call.
My parents took me to bars as a kid, but I grew up in Texas and isn’t a big deal where I’m from. The bars were small, locally owned, and often had outdoor seating. Very family friendly places, even if they are bars.
I don’t take my daughter out to bars, but I prefer house gatherings over going out, so it’d be odd for me to be in a bar at all.
Go with what feels right to you. Trust yourself to care for your child.
It does sound like you and hubby need to have a talk though. Might be an underlying issue.
Children do not belong in a bar. And grow Adults that say they do are plain ignorant. So maybe you and your party aren’t drinking but what about the ones in the bar that are and ignorance breaks out amongst people that can’t hold their liquor. What i want to know is it actually a birthday party for a niece that’s under age and if so a bar isn’t a place to have a birthday party. If she’s turning 21 then that’s understandable and just tell your husband if we can get a babysitter I’ll be glad to go and if not you go and celebrate her birthday for both of us.
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I think it depends on whether it is just a bar or a bar and grill. Is it family friendly? Does it have a kid’s menu (it sounds like your baby isn’t old enough to order from a kid’s menu, but that is an indication for us of family friendliness. Right now, I personally would be cautious with a baby in any public setting given the pandemic.
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I used to think this way, however no it’s not wrong as long as it’s a sports bar or somewhere that welcomes kids. We have little bars around us that have menus where people can eat. It’s fine
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If it is a bar and grill then I don’t see why not. But it’s your baby so you do what you think is best. I highly doubt any regular bar will have a birthday party for a small child.
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Your opinion is never wrong. Its whatever yourr comfortable with. Personally it depends on the bar. Some have sitting areas and tables and its not just a bar. We bring our bring out all the time. Well before covid. Lol.
But ultimately its whatever you feel comfortable with.
For me personally, it would depend on the behavior of everybody there and if I knew I wouldn’t have to worry about my child being exposed to something they shouldn’t, but if you’re not comfortable with taking your child to a bar, don’t do it, and don’t let anybody bash you for making the best decision for your child.
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I agree,really depends on what type of bar,how much the bartender allows,and fyi,not all that go into a bar go there to get drunk.Some people go to shoot pool,some go to have a drink and chill to the music and some just to have a couple drinks with friends.If it has a kitchen,go there to eat and drink.Overall though if you don’t feel comfortable don’t go.Also,my mother was a bartender and we spent time in the bar playing pac man while she worked because she didn’t have a babysitter but that was early 80’s lol.
My almost 2 year old has been in plenty of bars - & her 2nd bday with be at bar/restaurant that has an arcade
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I would not want my kiddos around a bunch of drinking people never know whats going to happen when alcohol is involved.
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Bar or not, if the location makes you feel uncomfortable then you shouldn’t go. But what type of bar is it? Somewhere downtown that’s going to be loud and crazy? Don’t bring the baby. Is it a bar and grill type restaurant? It’s probably appropriate! Is it like a Lions club where the whole place is rented out for the special event? You’d probably be fine, and if it’s just friends and family there I don’t think anyone would think that’s trashy. Shame on them for making you feel upset about this decision!
But as a happy compromise, maybe it’s possible you swing by for 15 or 20 minutes and then head home 
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It would be if you went to the bar as Nd started drinking but if you are just going to eat go for it !!
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I agree with you, it is trashy looking to have your baby in a bar. There is nothing wrong with standing up for what you think is right for your baby. You are the mother whom would be looked down on if you allow it.
Hmmmm I feel there’s absolutely nothing wrong with taking a child/children to a bar usually they would book a private area for family only.If that was the case each to their own not everyone agrees having kids in a bar and that’s ok too.
Depends on the bar. Family friendly? You’re over reacting Imo.
Not necessarily family friendly? I’m on your side.
Only you can make that decision. 
Xx
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Covid!! And if people are eating & drinking, then they’re not wearing their masks. I know I wouldn’t take my baby there
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I have taken my kids into a bar during the day before and we ate lunch with their Dad. I wouldn’t take them into the same place at night though, its a different atmosphere!
Well we’ve had a lot of family parties at VFW’S. That’s a bar. We had a blast but it’s your child. I don’t see anything wrong with it.
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Depends on the type of bar,here in Australia most bars (pubs) now have kids play areas and seperate bar/ eating sections for families. All my nieces and nephews birthdays and special occassions have been at the pub, majority of sporting Clube here are also sponsored by a pub or club so they hold their presentation there too, it’s completely normal
I’ve taken my kids, and so did others in our family for my aunts birthday at a bar…We had the whole one side of the bar for just us…We had tables of food/drinks(non alcoholic drinks) for everyone on our side and you had to order your own booze…It was simple,nothing wrong with it,mostly everyone drank,had fun and all kids have to be out of establishment by 9 anyways.
As for the breast pump being broken check with your health insurance you may be able to get a free one. The Dr writes the script and you go to a medical supply store to pick it up
Every one is different. I would never take my child to a bar bc I don’t like my child around second hand smoke. I can’t breathe around smoke so what makes you think a baby can? If it was an outside party then yes I would take him but not when it’s indoor.
If its a like a bar and grill then you can no problem. But you can’t if it’s just a bar. Plus why would you take a baby around a bunch of drunk people?
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I think regardless where it is if you don’t want to take your baby you shouldn’t be forced to. Especially with everything going on in the world right now.
Depends, if it’s in the day, no, if it’s at night when it’s busy I wouldn’t. If it’s a bar/grille I think it would be ok because it’s technically a restaurant
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Where I’m from Roosters and Frickers are very family friendly restaurants/bars.
I abhor alcohol, so personally, I thunk it’s wrong for anyone to go in a bar.
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If it’s a dive bar, probably not. Bar and grill, yeah why not? We always take our kids to bar and grills to eat 
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I would say that it’s not a big deal at all especially since your child is still young enough that they don’t know that people are getting drunk around them anyway. I’ve worked in a few bars and people bring their kids in all the time as long as at least one of the parents isn’t getting Tanked and can properly care for the kid who is there it’s not a big deal. I’ve never taken my kids to any bars with the exception of like a restaurant that has a bar in it you know but I would say if it was like a family gathering like that to celebrate a birthday I would go ahead and take them
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No ones opinion is right or wrong here. But I have taken my kids to pubs and clubs and it hasn’t been a problem.
An opinion can’t be right or wrong. If that’s how you feel, then that’s okay. It shouldn’t be a big deal to anyone just because you prefer not to bring your infant to a bar.
What are you trying to obtain with random strangers agreeing with you or not? Are you going to bring this forum into the argument that shouldn’t be posted on social media to begin with, IF more than not people agree with you? What is it to you if random strangers agree with you or not? It’s your life and your kids. What you do with them or not is on you.
For what it’s worth, not all bars are the same. Growing up in Wisconsin, that’s all there is, is bars. There is a difference in bringing your kid to a bar like in the old sitcom “Cheers”, versus a stereotypical roudy biker bar.
If its a bar then no kids will be allowed so your probably not telling the whole story.
I wouldn’t unless they had a party room where you are separate from the bar atmosphere.
Babies do not belong in bars.
I’d say it’s not a huge deal…definitely depends on bar.
Bar & grill… or bar? Huge difference
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Think depends on party and pub situation, I was a young mum so I had my eldest son around for both my 21st and 30th bdays as he would of been 2.5 and 10 and he was there for both party he had a great time and it made nice photo memories. I would of dreamed doing it with mount him there to fair.
Children. Do. Not. Belong. In. A. Bar. Only. A. Uncouth. Redneck. Would. Take. 1. My. Grandmother. Always. Said. A. Time. & Place. For. Everything
I really do not like taking my kids to a pub so I agree …
Some bars may not allow it. Best to call ahead
Never apologize for saying no and having class.
Depends on the type of venue. Is it a pub/RSL style where you go for a meal and drinks, or was it an actual bar like more night club style.
We take our daughter to the pub all the time for meals with out friends. We sit in the dining bit, never the sports bar, and leave my about 9 at the latest which is usually when the food stops and things start getting a bit more rowdy.
Were other people taking kids or was your baby going to be the only kid? If you were the only one taking a kid I can understand that it makes it uncomfortable, but if there was other young kids I don’t see the problem
If they are family friendly, big deal.
You have a right to an opinion so stop stressing. In my personal opinion it’s all situational. Like bar and grill? Fine. Seedy biker bar? Probably not. I’m from WI so it’s not uncommon for a child to accompany their parent(s) to a party that either is a bar or has a bar. Just make your best judgement and honestly this spat with your husband will pass. Shit happens in every relationship and y’all won’t always agree.
Well, they also serve alcohol in most restaurants. Is it trashy to take your baby to a restaurant?
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i meannnn. depends on the bar. most bars have food too which means hey, fuck it 
bring the baby. BUT do whatever you are comfortable with.
You are allowed to say no… So what if he gets mad he will get over it 
I wouldn’t take my child to a bar
Your opinion is right
Like a bar bar? Just for adults to drink?
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This story is all over the place. I’m pretty sure I just had a stroke.
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It depends on the kind of bar. Like restaurant that has a bar or like a place that people specifically go to for drinks? Are people notoriously stumbling drunk in this place?
For me personally no.
Your mama you know best. You know what kind of bar they are having the party at. My mom worked at a biker bar the guys there would have protected me with their lives if it came down to it. However sometimes it got outta hand at night if noone is gonna be there I’d say it’s okay but if it’s open that would be a hard no.
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I mean my mom has always been a member of the legion in her hometown so I spent many Friday nights hanging out in their bar with my mom, and so have my kids, for fish fry’s etc. But I guess that’s kind of a more “tame” bar environment. I guess it depends on the type of people and environment and time of day. But if you aren’t comfortable with it then he should respect that and go alone.
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I mean I don’t see why it would be trashy as long as it’s someone’s birthday. If you’re going to drink and that’s it then yes, but as long as it’s a celebration of some sort there should be no judgement.
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At most bar birthday parties they have it either before the bar gets crowded or in a sectioned off area. In my opinion if it was a small bar I’d take him or if it’s before the bar gets busy. You could even breastfeed him in the bathroom
You should do what feels right to you. You are the mom. If you don’t feel comfortable going, then don’t go. Your husband should respect your feelings. You are you’re own person. If you don’t want to do something then don’t. Other people on here are saying my kids have been in a bar what’s the issue? The issue is, you don’t want to, and personally I wouldn’t. I was also a bartender for over 30 years. Depending on the bar, I have seen a lot of stuff kids don’t need to see.
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Nothing wrong with taking a baby to a bar, its not like you are going to drink anyways. My parents took my brother and I to a bar just to eat, granted we weren’t babies just kids. I brought my daughter to bars to eat when she was a baby and I didn’t drink at all, I couldn’t anyways because I was 18 when I had my daughter. Unless the niece is under 21 and the party is at a bar I would say it is weird. Either way nothing wrong with going for a few hours, just feed the baby before you go, if you have to during the party just excuse yourself to feed the baby.
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You do not have to ask anyone if it’s ok or not to take YOUR CHILDREN ANYWHERE! If you as a mom, you feel like it’s not ok to take your kids there , then you are absolutely right to think that way. Just because other people do, and it ok that they do, doesn’t mean it works for you. Plain and simple.
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Why listen to others opinions. If your not comfortable taking your baby to a bar then that’s totally up to you. Nobody should be forced to do something they are not comfortable with and nobody should judge you or make you feel bad for making a decision for yourself. Can you not organise a special day with the birthday girl and do something nice for both of you? Make it special like high tea.
If it was during the day I’d say go ahead I have takin my kids during the day but my step sad was bartender nd they had the wedding anniversary there not many people but family at the time if it’s at nite I’d say no nd most bars wouldn’t allow u tot ale kids in after a certain time where in at kids isnt allowed ina bar after 8pm
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I spent a lot of time in little local bars as a kid with my great uncle. I turned out ok, but this was all in small town America. Of more concern is, why are people gathering in groups for whatever the reason with COVID?
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Seems like you might be mad about something else… but I don’t see why it’s trashy if it’s a family birthday party. As long as people don’t smoke in the bar, it’s nbd in my opinion. Also yeah get a pump! You can feed the baby before you go make an appearance at a family function. But it’s always handy to have the freedom to have a bottle when you need it.
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Just for the record, the [21+] law does not apply to breastfeeding babies. You (and your baby) are legally allowed in the same places.
That being said, you must do what feels right to you. I find people often nitpick what you do. People will always talk. Do what makes you happy; do what feels right for you.
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