Nope! Maybe play him at his game and ask for something unreasonable and expensive! See the look on his face, then explain you have like a 100 budget, or whatever you can afford, and surprise each other with something
I think you are NOT being unreasonable, but he is.
No your not being unreasonable…like you said you have to Live within your means … as much as I love Christmas I refuse to get myself in debt for one day! My husband & I concentrate on the kids & get each other a small gift say maybe £20-30 but we both agreed it’s about the kids we can buy each other anything anytime all year 
so no stand your ground if you feel so strongly about it.
$400 for a shirt is expensive! Whether a person is struggling or not
400 are you kidding wow that’s alot can’t you get a fake one lol would he know the difference, ask him will he spend the same on you as well.
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Wow… he definitely seems pretty selfish considering the children and living paycheck to paycheck.
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so, this is what I would do for my husband… sit down and say, I would absolutely love to get you that, but its not in the budget, then tell him what price the is in the budget ask him what he’d like within that price range and ask him for something for yourself within that price, then what I would do is say we can get the jersey at tax return time as an early Father’s day gift, this way he is rewarded and feels valued…
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Christmas only comes once a year and it’s not just for kids he works for the money he deserves to have something that he wants get it for him I would get it from my husband I just bought him the things that he wanted this year and we live paycheck to paycheck also but it’s Christmas have a heart Merry Christmas
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Give him a gift card for the amount you can afford to spend, at the place that sells the jersey and in his card write " Merry Christmas! Here’s a little something towards the jersey you want." If you have family or friends that buys for him, have them do the same and when he has enough to purchase it, he can.
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Unless he’s badgering you about it I don’t think it’s unreasonable you asked what he would like and he told you. You don’t have to get it for him.
We have 4 kids combined and just bought a house we as well are not exchanging gifts we would rather make it about the kids
$400 is way to much 
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No you are more than reasonable
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not at all - just think of what else you could do with $400 let him buy his own jumper with HIS money if he wants it so badly x
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My husband and I make pretty good money. We are extremely lucky. However, we bought a house last year and with that comes more financial burden when things go wrong. In the last 3 months we’ve had some issues that needed to be addressed which has caused us to be a little tight with our budget, so we decided not to buy for each other this year and only buy for our parents and my daughter. It was the smartest choice financially, and we know that when we are back to a good financial place in a couple months that we can buy what we want or need to then.
I would buy it for him. It’s always nice to exchange on Christmas, and it’s good for your children to see it isn’t just about them. Christmas is the one time of year where you can ask for something you’d never buy for yourself. I would act like I wasn’t going to buy it and then pull a Christmas Story on him. It would make him really happy.
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Not unreasonable at all. He has to learn to scale back sometimes.
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There are apps that allow you to make payments on jerseys so you don’t need to pay everything all at once. If you have the means maybe look into Zip or Afterpay.
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It’s really not that much money if you divide it by the 52 weeks in the year it’s 7.00 or so a week
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I would never pay that much for anything especially sence you’re living from check to check and he should understand but he just don’t care. Why don’t you ask for something that high and see what he says
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He would be getting a framed picture of the Jersey with an iou lol
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I would not buy him that
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So is he getting you a $400 gift too? If so, does he think y’all have an extra $800 to spend on gifts for yourselves when you’ve got 3 kids to buy for?! Y’all need to have a serious discussion if money is that tight. Where’s this $$ going to come from?
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Get a tshirt and make the jersey yourself and say this is what I could afford
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You don’t have to get anyone an expensive gift, even if they ask for it. This includes childish husbands.
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I would buy him something, but not that. If you already don’t have the extra to spend, tf makes him think he should have a $400 jersey just to look at?
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Of course you should exchange presents
He better get another job smh gifts are not even what Christmas is about, my ex husband was selfish af like yours
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I’m thinking he’s selfish, he knows the budget, he knows you have children, where are you supposed to come up with $400? What are you getting for Christmas? You work hard too. I think this is messed up. Children first,
I have been in this situation, he gets expensive shit, I have to go to Goodwill to clothe and put shoes on my kid’s feet, it’s an issue. Discuss finances, set a limit for each person, including him.
thats a little crazy, me and my boyfriend are also raising 3 kids, pretty much live paychrck to paychrck and we got like a 60 dollar limit for each other.
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My husband and I stopped exchanging gifts when our daughter was born. It isn’t necessary… throughout the year we get stuff so Christmas is just another day to us.
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Not unreasonable at all. When things are tight we agree on a dollar amount that’s appropriate for our budget and to make sure the kids still have a good Christmas. This year it’s $20. Still the fun of picking something out for someone and getting to unwrap something, without making an unwise financial decision. Christmas is about the kids not the adults and if you don’t have it, you don’t have it. He needs to accept that unfortunately.
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Ask him if your getting a $400 present aswell if hes asking for something at that amount. 1. He shouldn’t ask. 2. He should be greatful for what he gets. Ask him if there’s a spare $800 lying around then should be sweet to get yous a $400 gift each lol if yous have a tight budget then yous have a tight budget. Don’t mend it for his jersey lol
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If you say you aren’t wealthy and can’t afford it then don’t buy it. Santa is in a crisis right now anyways.
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He’s a joker. It’s ok to want these things, tell him to put a little away each pay and save for himself. Yes well and good if you’ve got the $ to throw around but in this situation I think it’s ridiculous
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If you simply can’t afford it, it isn’t worth going into debt over or worse, not paying bills in order to buy it. Have a conversation about a dollar amount that works for both of you. Good luck!
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I don’t think wanting something makes him selfish , it’s Christmas time I think everyone should feel special it’s been a rough couple years for everyone if you can’t afford that gift just tell him decide a ballpark amount and exchange gifts … P.s. I hope you get something really nice and you love it !!!
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Me and my partner don’t buy gifts for eachother, we spend all our spare money on gifts for our 3 children. We do arrange/book a meal or night away once a year and that’s classed as our birthday present, Christmas present and our anniversary present to eachother. Always nice to have something to look forward to but nothing is more precious than the smiles on our wee ones faces 
Me and my husband don’t do gifts for each other we have 4 kids. But we do get things we want when income tax comes back that’s our yearly gift 
that way we can afford Christmas and not stress.
No your not. Hes being selfish and self centered!
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Take a picture of the Jersey and put it in a frame. 
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That’s Crazy for a Jersey. It’s the thought. It dosent have to be expensive. Merry Christmas!!
Yes I think so. I know it’s a lot of money, and I absolutely see where you are coming from (I’m the one in my marriage who ties the purse strings 
) BUT life is short and it sounds like you both work really hard and you guys deserve to treat yourselves every once in a while.
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That’s something you go michaels and get a shadow box and hang it on the wall to look at 
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I would get it for him. Sometimes it’s not worth the fight. Maybe there’s a specific reason he wants it. Although, most jerseys aren’t that much unless they are autographed.
A lot of times men are ignored. We spend hundreds on kids for toys and clothes they will outgrow in weeks and we do it without hesitation. You’ll be getting him something he’ll have forever.
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Me and my partner never expect expensive things. Sure we will show ideas that are cheap and bit pricey but if the other can’t get it. Then so be it. We’re happy with whatever we get for one and other. Some years one of us will buy more or spend more than the other. And other times we struggle. But it’s the thought that counts.
But for you. If your struggling and think u really can scrape to get it. And he will wear once or so. Then you do what u can do
If he like it and gunna make him happy. If not surely he can understand and make it anther time for it. And settle for some perfume and a outfit maybe.
But do what’s best for you. Don’t stress if u can’t make it happen.
Me and my husband have $20 limit spend on each other for Xmas since we have 3 kids and we also give gifts to cpl other kids in family, on other event like anniversary and bday we might spend like 50 or do something for other one , for his bday we went to motel I save for cpl months for room and little spending money , for my bday he got me cheese cake 
and his day off he let me off ( I am stay at home mom) he clean whole house , took care kids ,aminals , …I have say I also handle money so he it harder for him get me stuff w out me knowing so he doe stuff like that … yes ur husband is being unreasonable not bc he want exchange but what he want is unreasonable I would say give 3 things I pick which one I getting u and if he don’t give u cheap gift ideal then he being really unreasonable
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I’m a man! That’s totally crazy! Use that money for something more valuable. Buy some saving bonds for your kids education or rainy days. He is nuts!
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Get him something else what he wants n what he need are two totally different things I keep telling my husband something Uber expensive $309-$400 knowing he will probably only spend $50-$100 on
Me
I would get him a more reasonably priced team jersey. The extravagant one can wait til he gets a side job or sells something he already has or maybe his parents can buy that for him.
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Christmas only comes once a year. If he is a good husband and father he deserves something special. If you already got the kids shopping done than i say get him the jersey. Its something he really wants.
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I would find a used one and if you can’t save that gift for a time when maybe money isn’t so tight my hubs and I have gone back and forth with be able to but for each other and not it does make my son sad and I’m sure my daughter when we don’t exchange but sometimes you just can’t afford it and that’s okay no one is our here living middle class even making it anymore. Its not unreasonable to thing about the needs of your family in a whole over just a want of your husband’s
Honestly my husband never asks for much. So I would get it for him but for something that costs that much it should’ve been discussed a long time ago so I can put money aside and it doesn’t put us out.
He can want it all he wants doesn’t mean you have to get it. Give him a Christmas card with money towards it and he can pay the rest . My bf wanted a new saw for Christmas and it was over 300. I told him this is my budget and if he wanted it he could pay the difference so he did.
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I agree with you.
If you just purchase for him (we don’t Bc we can’t afford it so we do Christmas for kids only) but if you just, he could find something cheaper lol
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My husband and I worry about kids first then get eachother something. If we can’t afford it then we just enjoy the day with each other and kids. That’s the most important part of Christmas not the gifts.
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That’s why you don’t ask what they want
You don’t have to get a $400 jersey when there are cheaper versions of the same jersey. Go to NFL shop or Fanatics .com to find a cheaper one. It is probably to late in the season to get it on time for Christmas anyway. My hubby and I focus on Christmas for the kids and we exchange gifts for each other when we get our tax money.
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His request is selfish
We decided this year not to go crazy on Christmas for the kids we spend about 150 for each kid. I got my husband a shirt and two pair of pants for work that I already gave him and he’s going to get me some shoes but he’s taking me to pick them out. I would never ask him for something that expensive he’s my husband and I tell him what I want but I would never expect it. I actually wanted a silver necklace that was about $300 they honestly didn’t even tell him because I don’t want him to spend that much money. And we can afford it.
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My ex was the exact same way, knowing we are struggling but his whole list was $150+ baseball and football jerseys. I got him 30$ ones from Marshalls, he never knew the difference
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Kids first, a little bit of something for him. Spending time with family is more precious
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If he likes it and he works hard for it why not get him something he likes? Save up for it. I never understood why people say no to things that people work hard for also? Both work. Both should get something thatd make them happy. But thats just me.
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Not even! You have to make life changes and sacrifices together if you want to stop living week to week he has to be on board with that too tho.
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I agree with BOTH. If finances don’t allow for that kind of purchase then just tell him you think it would be more responsible to get this at a later time. However, it’s very unfair to ask someone, especially someone you love, what they want with no price set and then be upset at what they choose. And your reasoning that “he’s going to wear it once, maybe twice a year” is not valid. We ALL have things that we use or wear very infrequently and we aren’t selfish for doing so. In the end, you need to decide what you value more. Your husband, or the $400 for that jersey?
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If you didn’t want to know, you shouldn’t ask. He’s just being honest telling you what he wants.
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Honestly, why is it unreasonable? Because he’s a man? Women ask for jewelry and expensive perfume all the time and noone bats an eye. We spend hundreds on hair, makeup, nails, etc and our husbands never say a word about it (if you don’t cool, but many of us do) So why when our husbands who likely foot most of the bills (obviously not in all situations) ask for something expensive it is unreasonable? They deserve nice things too. If my husband really wanted something like that and I could make it happen, I wouldn’t hesitate. Odds are if he is asking for it he believes you can afford it, if not then explain that. Then maybe save up to get it for his b-day or anniversary.
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Depends if you can afford it, as someone that knows the struggle of living paycheck to paycheck, dont break your budget over it. Maybe giftcards to an official store to go towards the cost? I get that guys love their jersey’s, I have a fiancee who has one his mom bought. If I know there are things I cant afford ill tip her off about what it is like his brand name sneakers. Im a mom and a student so have to do what is reasonable for our family and finances.
Find out if the sellers offer a discount to seniors. Have your senior buy it.
If it was me…I would take a step back for a minute.
It’s not unheard of to want things you can’t afford.
He knows y’all’s financial situation and he’s well aware of what you can or can’t afford. Saying “I want this” doesn’t necessarily mean that’s what he’s demanding you get him.
My husband wants a power hammer.
We can’t afford it. He knows we can’t.
But saying that’s what he wants doesn’t mean he’s demanding I get it for him.
It’s just an example of his interests.
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Don’t EVER go into debt getting gifts for people. That’s my stance anyways. There are things you can do that don’t cost a penny, such as making a coupon book that he can redeem (for a massage, breakfast in bed, getting out of cleaning for a day, etc). I understanding wanting a gift for Christmas, but if you don’t have money to spend you shouldn’t be spending it on non-essential things.
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is he a good man to you & your kids? If the answer is yes, then buy him this, It’s only one gift & yes it is expensive, but if he is really a good man, buy it for him
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He’s being very selfish.
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Don’t go breaking your back for gifts. My husband works 7 days a week 14 hrs a day. In the oil field, if I can give him the world of everything he ever wanted I would. And I have told him this. He always tells me that he has everything he’s ever wanted with our kids and me. He never wants me to spend any money on him or buy him anything. I still bought him things I know he will need. 14 yrs we always get each other things. He may buy expensive things for me he can afford lol I do buy him why I can afford on my own.
A $400 jersey??? From where?!? My son-in-law has bought many jerseys but never one for that price! Check around because that’s too much!
I would not! I would tell him I would love to that for him, but we would need to budget for it and we can look at it for his birthday, then agree together on a reasonable dollar amount for the holiday.
Some of these comments make me think some of you have never lived paycheck to paycheck with multiple children
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If you can’t afford it then you can’t. I would just buy him something that you can afford and say maybe if you all save it could be something in the future.
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Don’t go broke or debt over gifts more to holidays than gifts 
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My husband and I worry about the kids, if we can we do for each other we do. Most of the time we don’t get to however. Its very hard living pay check to paycheck. It’s enough for my husband and I to know we are on the same team and we made those kids day.
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That’s a lot of money for a shirt…i mean that’s what it is right? A shirt with a sports stars name on it? I mean kudos to your husband for having such high taste go for it but when I think of $400 I think holy shit that’s two weeks of groceries and maybe even a romantic evening out…. Priorities are set in strange places
She’s saying they cannot afford it . It’s unreasonable for your budget right now .
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I think it’s unreasonable when you’re living paycheck to paycheck and Christmas is a week away. The kids should ALWAYS come first. $400 is pricey for ANY gift. Especially for people who struggle to get by every paycheck. The whole him vs her mentality that some of these comments have is disgusting. They’re married. They’re a team. If they can’t afford it they can’t.
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Christmas is for CHILDREN. Period
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I’d be more worried about providing a special Christmas morning for my kids then worrying about a $400 jersey! It’s selfish of him to even consider it knowing your financial situation and he’s putting a lot of undo stress on you. If somehow you can swing it great, if not don’t worry about it.
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If anything use Afterpay or one of those payment plan that doesn’t charge interest and you get 4 payments every 2 weeks
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I agree with you that’s asking for to much that money could pay abill and yall have 3 kids i tell him I would give him 400.00 on the operation were he can’t make anymore kids
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A $400 jersey- is steep, but, for an example - how much was your wedding dress? (You said husband, so I assume you got married)
I personally wouldn’t spend $400 on 1 item of clothing (my wedding dress was $200 and I didn’t even want to spend that, it’s a 1 time thing!)
Good luck with that one!
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We’re saving for a house so no exchange between my husband and I but we are stuffing each other’s stockings with a $25 limit 
If it’s unreasonable for your budget he needs to understand that. But just wanting something really isn’t unreasonable.
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He sounds selfish. You’re right, he’s wrong
Seems a bit selfish of him to ask for such an expensive gift, knowing the struggles you both face financially daily. Just my opinion.
I would much rather spend the money on the babies. My husband I skipped gifting each other when we were paycheck to paycheck. I worked out the car payment every year so we would be ahead (by making half the regular payments every two weeks instead of one full payment monthly), and I’d use that money to do what I could for the kids. Adults know when money is tight, and it’s silly to expect an expensive gift when you live paycheck to paycheck!
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Nope, not unreasonable at all. My husband wants a forged thing that’s also 400$. I am off on sick leave he just went back. Money is tighter than a nun holding her rosary.
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Me an my other half maybe bought each other stuff twice in the 12 yrs been together and we worry about the kids only. And we live paycheck to paycheck.
We maybe occasionally get each other things out of the blue
You’re both crazy…. Him for asking and you for needing to ask if it’s unreasonable!!!
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400 dollars is alot of child’s toys…or clothes.
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He needs to remove his head from his behind. Do not buy it for him, you have 3 kids. Tell him not to be so selfish.
My husband and I don’t exchange gifts for any holidays, except birthdays. We like to make each holiday as special as we can for our kids. It also takes the pressure off of each of us to get the other a gift they may or may not use/want. We’re adults and buy the stuff we really want for ourselves throughout the year. This works really well for our house and leaves the focus of the holidays on our kids. Good luck!
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Umm that seems a little much my hubby and I exchange white elephant gifts to each other this year I got him " the world’s smallest shop vac" it actually works and he has been complaining all year that the full size one doesn’t work so good.
Christmas is for kids it’s that simple. If he wants a $400 Jersey tell him to go and buy his own that’s not what Christmas is about.
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