Is She Just Being Fake?

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"Ugh going to try to give facts and make sense. Emotions are high and I Really need unbiased opinions. Backstory. Best friend of 15 years. Brother passed away in a motorcycle accident 6.5-7 years ago. Almost 6 years ago I started dating his best friend. She wasn’t happy about it, she’s a swinger but tried telling me she’s in love with him and told Him not to date me (she had a long term boyfriend at this time) Fast forward 3.5 years we get engaged. NO congrats. she just falls out of my life, Not for a lack of trying. I’d try to make plans she’d ignore my texts unless it was about small talk. For the past 3 years she hasn’t once reached out to me…. Until yesterday when I announced I was pregnant with our first child. Now she’s texting me asking how I’m feeling…… Side note I live in a two family and rent out the upstairs and ‘miss too busy for me’ has come and hung out with the kid upstairs. She also drives right past my street daily, I’m 3 minutes from her work. I wanted to respond “ how am I feeling? I’m feeling like I tried for the past 3 years to have you in my life and you chose distance from me, and I was never sure why. And now I’m not sure why you care how I’m feeling.” Is it wrong for me to ignore her? I have mixed emotions. Why does she care now?"

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The following top answers have been selected by a moderator from hundreds of responses to the original question.

"I wouldn’t even respond, 3 years of trying is far too long in my opinion."

"I wouldn’t tell her anything, unless you unleash the truth of how you feel about her."

"I would definitely call her out on her shitty behaviour"

"I would’ve cut ties with her a long time ago. That’s not a friend, AT ALL. Her vibe seems gross asf."

"She doesn’t care. Don’t let her in your life, especially now that you have a child to protect."

"Maybe when he died it hit her hard and she got lost. Maybe she has other things going on.I would just ask her plain and simple. Tell she hurt you and of that’s how it’s gonna be your done."

"If she wanted to distance herself from you, she was allowed to. She clearly needed or wanted the space from you. And that’s okay. It’s also okay for you to be upset about it. She’s reaching out and it is up to you to decide if you want to rekindle the friendship or not."

"Tel her that your feelings are hurt but also understand that death does crazy things to people and every one deals differently."

"I would text exactly what you said and then drop her"

"If you been trying for 3 years and haven’t gotten anything out of it from her don’t don’t bother responding she just wants to be nosey now that your having a baby with the guy she supposedly loves just move on"

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