It bothers me that my boyfriend follows beautiful girls on tiktok: Advice?

So my BF & I used to be jealous; it was very toxic. But we talked it out and fixed it. Our relationship is very good now. But we both use TikTok, and I have seen him follow like four sexy girls, and I don’t want to tell him how I feel about it because we agreed that we wouldn’t let jealousy ruin our relationship. I know inside of me that I like seeing guys too, but I don’t follow them, but it still feels bad seeing him follow those girls. Other than that, I trust him, and I know he loves me. Am I overreacting? Should I tell him?

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Tell him, it’ll only bigger you more and more over time and you might even develop resentment towards him for it, just both be respectful of each other and establish what you think is ok and what’s not

I’m guessing the two of you are super young because this sounds so immature lol.
You really need to work on your insecurities. If your partner just looking at photos of other women whom he’s never met and will most likely never meet bothers you, then you need to chill out.
If this jealousy stems from him having been unfaithful in the past, just leave the relationship. There’s no point continuing a relationship you don’t feel safe and comfortable in, it’s just wasting yours and his time.

I would definitely recommend telling how you feel. One of the most important things in a relationship is communicating, even if it’s hard or something you think you’ve worked on. You feel how you feel, you can’t help it. The only thing from here is to talk to him, tell him how you feel, and be open and honest. If you don’t it’s only going to bottle up and one day you’ll explode.

Help a mama out and respond anonymously on our forum. It bothers me that my boyfriend follows beautiful girls on tiktok: Advice?

Sounds to me like y’all didn’t fix anything if you’re still jealous. Get over it. He is with you.

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U didnt fix it! If your jealous hes following girls hen there something wrong there

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You should see my husbands facebook, twitter and tiktok :rofl: its full of them :rofl:

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Follow guys and see how he reacts. :woman_shrugging: Go from there

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Did you really fix anything? Doesn’t sound like it….

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I was like that with my boyfriend but I was just traumatized from my past relationships. I was insecure that I constantly looked to who my bf recently followed on Instagram or TikTok but we talked. He reassured me that I always had him and I had nothing to do worry about. Communication is always best or else what’s bothering you is going constantly eat at you.

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“but we fixed it”

Didja though?

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If social media makes or breaks your relationship, you’re relationship sucks and needs to end :woman_shrugging:t2:

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Sounds like you’re ‘very good relationship’ is in fact still very toxic.

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We live in a generation that is so accustomed to these things. Truth is, marriages actually lasted back in the day because we didn’t have all these options and distractions at our fingertips. Any woman here saying it’s ok, we’ve just grown to become use to it… because tbh it’s really not. To each their own opinion, not everyone will agree with me… it’s not like he’s a bad person for doing it, it’s the world we live in… but it’s not healthy because naturally comparisons and desires do happen. You either have to become ok with it, or find someone who’s like you.

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Why don’t you choose to follow guys you think are good looking? What reason does he choose to follow the hot girls? Jealousy often times comes from our own insecurities. I would start there and work on self growth. But depending on your reasonings of followong or not following others it might not even be jealousy and instead something else that’s causing miscommunication or misunderstandings.

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Its human nature to feel this way. Mostly because of past experiences. The key to every healthy relationship is communication. Express how you feel. But make sure you’re calm. I feel like our own insecurities can break our own heart sometimes. State I feel instead of I think. It Moves the conversation in a whole different direction. But keep your chin up, relationships are not easy. At least the ones that last.

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Why don’t you just ask him why he is following them?
You may be reading way to much into it.
Communication is key to any relationship.

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Sweet fuck seriously, if you make dinner for him but he comments on a burger he sees on the new takeaway in town fb, saying it looks good is he in bother for that? So you don’t follow any male?

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You guys didn’t fix it tho cause you’re still doubting him cause of your jealousy so either you get over that jealousy or you move on and find someone else after you fix your self esteem. If there’s no trust there’s nothing hun.

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u need to talk to him about it. communication is everything

You are human, it’s ok to be jealous as long as u trust him

“My boyfriend and I USED to be jealous…”. No sweetheart. You STILL are jealous. Get a grip. There are beautiful girls everywhere. In real life. Social media. At least you know he’s doing it … if he comes home to you every night and gives you no reason to have doubts that he’s faithful, then you have nothing to worry about in my opinion.

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There’s a different between jealousy and respect. Follow them dudes and more then likely he will not like it.

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Tiktok is not real life. Neither is any social media platform.

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Do you really want things to change? He’s not respecting you. I’d tell him quick that I don’t like it. That it needs to stop. If it doesn’t , walk away. There are guys out there that would respect you.

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I personally think your over reacting but that’s just me each to there own! Xx

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So find some hot guys and follow them

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How did you find out he was following someone?

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If you’re jealous over your boyfriend watching/following random videos/people on tic tock, you’re not mature enough to be in a relationship. Is he supposed ask your permission on who he can or can’t follow? He’s fixed his jealousy issues? But you haven’t? So are you cheating, doing something he doesn’t know about or what? That’s usually where all the jealousness starts.

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My partner follows gorgeous Asian women on tic tok I follow big hairy viking men on there doesn’t mean he loves me any less or I love him any less

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Wow I did not expect to see the comments go that way. How long have ya been together? Unfortunately social media has become a good cheating/ viewing their fantasy outlet. No way in hell would I be ok with my husband following half naked chick’s on tic tok. I don’t care if he looks but hitting that follow button or heart button or save button nope sorry not happening. It’s more a respect thing for me I don’t do it so I expect him not to. Plus we got a daughter i say to him all the time would you be cool with our kid being half naked making tweaking videos and all these creeps following her. That ends that debate :woman_shrugging:

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Lol so? It’s Social Media :joy:

If it’s something that really bothers you, you should be able to talk to him about it. If he respects your feelings, he should be willing to listen and try to understand and come to a compromise.

Just go on his tic toc and unfollow them for him :joy::joy::joy::joy::joy:

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Please don’t have kids together

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Try asking him nicely why he’s following these girls, like what do they do on their page and go from there

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There will be other girls in every aspect of life, work,night out with the guys, out with you etc… be what separates you from a GIRL and a WOMAN. Dont worry about things that no matter how hard you try, you cant change. If you feel he will cheat, worrying about it wont change the outcome. You need to grow, and when you are at a point in your life where your man can go out with his buddies and you dont even call or text while hes out, it is then you have become a woman and can love and trust with no regrets or worry. Also for cripes sake its tiktok​:roll_eyes::woman_facepalming:

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You need to be single and get therapy :joy:

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If you have to hold something inside that bothers you, it’s not a healthy relationship. That’s just my 2 cents though.

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Me and my husband both watch stuff worse than tiktok but that’s us. If that’s not you it needs to be addressed. He works at the lake so he gets to look at girls in bathing suits. I’m kinda jealous.

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Immmm so your stalking his profile seeing who he follows?
If ya paranoid his lookin else where and cant get over it maybe this aint the relationship for you

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I am realizing I’m on a page for teenagers not mothers :roll_eyes:

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I think its okay as long as he’s not messaging the girls or commenting :thinking: to. Its just the internet . But I use to get upset until I relized it dosnt matter because he don’t comment or flirt he watches follows and scrolls.

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If insecurities are that severe to debate the entire relationship over social media following then some more self work and self worth needs to be addressed and worked on. There will always be attractive people in real life, and in the very unattainable social media platforms.
Closely watching someone else’s followers/ following is in itself unhealthy, and will create problems that aren’t truly problems. Being overly possessive, jealous, and controlling is also unhealthy.

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Betraying your trust
I would.

All these nasty comments. She’s allowed to feel what she feels.

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Follow hot guys 🤷 lol

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Your feelings are valid , talk to him and don’t let these other women make you feel like a jealous crazy person when all you need to do is set reasonable boundaries in your relationship.

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The women on this page are so weak and pathetic. You all need to grow a set and stop being so friggen hopeless and sad. As for this post, your relationship was over the minute you both fought over jealousy. Now you’re both just lying to yourselves trying to “hide” it. Admiring other men/women when you’re in a relationship is healthy and normal. Acting on it is what isn’t. Do yourselves a favor and end it and seek therapy for yourselves. :roll_eyes::roll_eyes::roll_eyes:

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Who cares hes with you not them!

Why is everyone being so mean? Women are allowed to feel how they feel. Just because YOU don’t feel it, doesn’t mean others don’t. Her feelings are valid. I know other girls watch porn with their significant other, but some people don’t do that. Some do not like the fact of following other females, when she stated she doesn’t follow other guys. It’s a respect thing. It doesn’t always have to mean jealousy, insecurity, or the need for therapy. Help each other grow. Don’t tear each other down.

If us women aren’t sticking up for each other, then who will?

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Sounds like you need to get over it. You said you talked about the jealousy thing and it seems like he accepted it, but you didn’t and you’re waiting to start an argument about it with him. It’s fucking tiktok and if you can’t handle that your boyfriend follows a few pretty girls, then you don’t need to be in the relationship.

If u were more confident in yourself as a strong woman maybe you wouldn’t care what he’s doing. I’m a grown adult and I can look at look up or watch whatever I want! no man, adult, child or SO will tell me different. As a grown woman i wouldntvwant anyone who would be in their feelings about it neither, because I want a confident emotionally stable and mature grown up as well. I’m just saying. Lol

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What works for one, works for both, follow hot guys, if he cares then what he’s doing is wrong because he shouldn’t do what he wouldn’t like! See if that helps haha

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Communicate with him. Let him know how it makes you feel but, don’t stop him. As long as he’s not leaving comments, messaging the person or liking it. He’s not doing anything wrong.

There is a big difference between “allowing” jealousy to ruin your relationship, and bringing up something that bothers you. Talk about how you feel. Honest communication is key to a healthy relationship. :heart:

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I can understand why you feel that way… just talk with him and explain your feelings but I don’t think you should be worried he’s with you for a reason! Men just like to fantasize

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Are u 12? Wtf. Grow up

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He’s just following them. Is he flirting ? Doing stuff?

What is with all these jealous ass people posting lately? Over their guys following content creators on TikTok, over watching porn, over seeing a pretty girl on tv - goddamn. This is weak ass high school crap. If you’re jealous or you admit the relationship is toxic, why are y’all still together?

Yes, you are over reacting. As long as he is looking and not touching…:+1:

I think you are over reacting. I follow a lot of people doesn’t mean I want them

Wow some of you are assholes.

Oh man. Grow up, let it go. Pretty childish.

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I would feel insecure too!! Forget what everyone else says and delete them when he’s not looking lmao. We don’t have any other social media in our relationship and we never fight ever. Now if we are out in public I’ve seen him look that away and probably when I’m not around but that’s what I don’t care about. You can’t help that, it’s human nature. You can help who’s tits youre following on social media. I would tell him you feel that way. I’ve cut whole people out of my life because they had other intentions with me and I was in a relationship. You shouldn’t have to think twice. My fiancée trusts me so he doesn’t ask me to delete people or anything but if he did ask , I would. That’s how our relationship is and maybe other people’s should be more like that. If he gets mad he’s not the one

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If he is following them he is interested in them otherwise wouldn’t follow.

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Don’t let anyone tell you what you should allow in your relationship! If it’s something that is bothering you then talk about it. If this was something that was previously discussed and he did it anyway then it needs to be addressed even if it’s just for reassurance. Just because some ppl allow this in their relationship doesn’t mean you have to.

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Idk. I wouldnt allow it with my husband. There is no need for him to look at other women. Hes not single anymore. I would say something. It has nothing to do with jealously and that’s just a bs excuse hes using to gaslight you.

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It will ruin you if you don’t discuss it. Just be civil but let him know

If you’re asking than you know your answer ! Why is this even a question !

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You don’t trust him if you are feeling Insecure and asking - period - this is common sense!

If that’s how you feel. . be with someone who feels the same way.

Your feelings matter…

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If trust wasn’t an issue, this wouldn’t be either.

My guy knows from the begining what I accept and what not. Girls and women in bikinis half naked on his timeline is not one of the things I am willing to alow. He understands and listens to me. I have a trust problem because of my father and previous relationships that I told him about at the begining. If he wasn’t ready to help me be secure in him and accept that I do have the jelausy problem, he would not be with me. But I was honest from the begining, I didn’t pretend even for a second that It wouldn’t bother me.

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Be honest with him. You can express how you feel towards something without making it about jealousy.

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Help a mama out and respond anonymously on our forum. It bothers me that my boyfriend follows beautiful girls on tiktok: Advice?

Girl u go follow guys that’s sexy. I mean nothing wrong with it. Ull are just watching tiktok

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They are on tiktok. They aren’t a threat to you. They can’t magically came through the phone and seduce him and he’s never going to meet them. So why be jealous?

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Just start following hot guys and see how he likes a taste of his own medicine.

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You’re overreacting :roll_eyes: It’s just TikTok lol

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Y’all should mutually agree to delete your TikToks. Social media in general is a relationship killer.

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You’re not overreacting. It’s a legit concern. He doesn’t have to be touching them for it to bother you… you have a right to feel some type of way about it. It’s not jealousy. It’s about respect. And if you feel disrespected by it… That’s not okay

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What’s the point of being jealous about people you have less than a snowball’s chance in hell of meeting? That’s just making issues where there are none.

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Just follow who you want to follow. Sometimes we let our insecurities get the best of us, especially in a relationship that has a past with the topic. It’s sensitive still.

Just follow the guys you want to follow. :woman_shrugging:t4: He could just be testing you. (Not that he is but you never know. If he addresses the people you follow, just tell him you peeped who he follows and thought you both were on the same page. It’s not a tit for tat thing but it honestly might make the situation a little different…

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It’s human nature. It’s an app. Lol

“So my bf and I used to be jealous” mmmm nope. You still are having issues. It’s tiktok.

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Be confident that he wants you and if he doesn’t you’re better off. Be open and honest and don’t play the games others are suggesting. Be a sister and admire beautiful women without being threatened! Good luck :crossed_fingers:

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I take it you are young… hopefully you grow out of that. That’s like being jealous because he thinks a celebrity is beautiful . Chances are it’s never gonna go anywhere.

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girl you sound about 16?..you still have jealousy issues, grow up before you commit to anything or anyone first…

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Go follow @whiteyy18 & it won’t bother you anymore :rofl:

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There’s nothing wrong with following sexy people on Tik Tok. It’s just an app and the likelihood of either of you actually meeting and talking to them is slim to none, especially if they have a lot of followers. I personally feel like a big part of you doesn’t trust him and that’s where the issue comes in.

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Social media isn’t real life. If likes, follows and mentions are creating a real life problem it’s time to let go of social media, for both of you.

It’s just an app. Looking at good looking people ain’t a crime …I would say if you are secure in your relationship and knows he loves you what’s it matter?

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If you are jealous, leave

Guys are visual. Why do u think they use women half naked to advertise for everything.
Hugh Heffner wasn’t rich for nothing. It doesn’t make u less than in his eyes. That’s your insecurities talking. And I’m not saying that rudely. U gotta self love and realize ur a queen.

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Your jealousy is your own insecurities. That isn’t his responsibility, get some therapy.

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Idk I’m 21 and people may seem to think it’s a 16 year old thing rather than a past relationship. I think your partner should respect your wishes and your boundaries, mine does. He was following or had those people on there for a reason. (Insta , fb) for me anyways, just to find out they aren’t there anymore, he took them all off. :woman_shrugging:t2: and I do look to see who he follows on tiktok too because I’m just so used to toxic … I could never go anywhere without feeling disrespected by my ex, it’s so different now having a partner that even looks away from girls down the street when he’s driving. Because those are my boundaries !! He knows how it affected me in my past relationship and he tries to be better than that. I’m in therapy and I think it has helped me and my relationship a lot because I was able to talk to my partner about how I felt and the issues in our relationship. So we’re able to go over each other’s boundaries and meet in the middle :woman_shrugging:t2: good men are out there and they’ll stick by you no matter what!! No one really knows how your relationship is going or past traumas or why you feel the way you feel but you! :blush:

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Humans are allowed to look at, follow and be friends with anyone, regardless of sex.
We would not want a man telling us who we can follow or be friends with so why would we want to try that controlling behavior on them?
Cheaters are going to cheat, trust your partner untill he gives you reason to mistrust him.
Don’t make your current pay for the sins of the past relationships.
If you are struggling with it then get some help through therapy to heal yourself so your present don’t suffer for the past tramas you have suffered.
We also need to define our own boundaries and make them clear in the beginning and be willing to walk Away if they are crossed or broken.
But we also need to understand that other people may not have the exact same boundaries and there is some communication and compromise that has to happen in every relationship.
We all live with some of our partner’s bad habits, different upbringing and their own boundarie.

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