Depends on the situation. Use your own judgement as don’t worry about other people.
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That is YOUR BABY and these moments go by so fast. You love, cuddle and nurture your baby the way YOU feel is best for you and baby. They will learn what they need to learn you just love your baby 
Babies don’t just need picked up for feeding or cuddles it’s reassurance they need. I’ve never left my baby to cry as I can’t stand it. I’ve got 2 happy boys of 12 and 7 who still come for cuddles xx
You have to find the balance between self soothing and needing attention. I never ran for my babies at the first little noise, but did not let them get to the screaming for attention part either. Just have to learn your babies communication methods vs fussy moments.
I agree… Babies. Are capable of self soothe. All mine never took pacifiers. I never held my kids constantly… I never ran to them every time they cry. My kids are very independent and smart.
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I follow my instincts 
if my heart says pick up my babes I do, my oldest is 9 now and these years have gone by so quick just enjoy the moment in the end you get to keep those memories good or bad. Just do what makes you feel like the best parent
I highly recommend the book Allen “The Happiest Baby on the Block.” And I feel you can’t hold your baby too much💕
I never let my babies cry. If they are crying they need sumthin. Their just little babies. Each their own but babies need to be loved on…
Self soothing and crying it out are not the same thing.
I didnt start self soothing with my son until he was 8 months old, still doing it and hes 3.5 years old. We also don’t over react when he gets hurt. As for co sleeping do whatever you think is best for you and yours
Mama, you do what makes YOU and YOUR BABY happy. I loved snuggling my baby when she was an infant. I picked her up all the time and comforted her when she would cry. She’s 11 months old and will fall asleep anywhere when she’s tired. She doesn’t need to be rocked or held. Loving your child doesn’t spoil them.
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You can’t spoil a child with love and attention.
They’re only little for a little while.
As long as youre helping them meet their milestones and do some floor/tummy time etc you’re on the right track
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You’re the parent. do what YOU want.
We sleep trained BECAUSE IT WORKED FOR OUR FAMILY. What worked for us might not work for you! What works for you might not work for us!!! If someone tells you you need to have your baby cry it out, say thank you for the advice and do what you feel is best! This is YOUR baby!!!
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You don’t need to teach an infant to self soothe. This can be taught later.
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Do whatever you are comfortable with doing. That’s your child and your choice how you parent
You can raise your baby however you want. I dont believe in the CIO method at all, but I also dont think you have to run to a child the moment they start fussing. Sometimes mine would cry for a min and ho back to sleep if I had ran in there he’d of stayed up. Self soothing is a learned ability and takes time. Eventually you will know when you’re needed and when you’re not
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I have four kiddos and I REFUSED the self soothe method! Babies are only little once ! Snuggle with your baby ! Love on your baby !! Babies can’t communicate to tell you what’s wrong, but they can feel love. So if they’re crying and you rock and love on them they feel better !
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Follow your mama instinct…i didn’t let my son get to the point of needing to self soothe and he is and always has been the happiest myself and anyone he meets has ever seen…
Depends on how old the baby is. If your concern is specifically for nighttime sleep, AAP has some guidelines and you can try looking into Ferber method. I personally tend to my 6 month old when he cries, but am practicing Ferber for sleep now that he reached this age.
Do what is right for you and your family
I always gave them 5 to 10 minutes depending on the cry. Screaming bloody murder i rushed to them just a whimper i give them a minute. I also didnt start waiting until 3 months
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Depends on the age of the child. Just remember, you can’t baby a baby.
My SO complains constantly that I let our son comfort nurse way too much and that he’ll become obese, mind you he’ll be 2 months old Saturday, I just ignore him, I actually just read an article last night about the benefits of not using the “cry it out” method, its good to give them all the snuggles they want!!
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Don’t listen to anyone. Do what makes you and baby happy! I personally think it’s wrong and choose to practice safe cosleeping and attachment parenting.
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I comfort my son til he falls asleep every night. I used to let him cry it out at bedtime where I checked on him every 10 minutes til he fell asleep on his own but I just couldn’t do it. I figure he can learn “night time close your eyes” when he’s in a toddler bed. He’s the only baby I’m having so I’m soaking it up! You do what works for your family. You’re always going to have that one member of the family or a friend tell you what you should do and shouldn’t do. That’s fine for them to give you their opinion (preferably when asked) but you do what feels right for you! Babies grow way too fast as it is. Mines already 17 months. I blinked and he was saying his first word. Soak it up before you don’t have the option to anymore!
It’s their only way of communicating. Why would anyone want to ignore that. Keep doing what feels right to you. Personally my babys have always been spoiled. Yes it gets hectic when you are trying to do things around the house but I rather them know they can depend on me, in the long run it’s worth it. My oldest is the most sweetest and respectful little 6 year old and she’s very much independent because of course it was taught but never by self soothing.
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I think it’s more important for a baby to learn you are always there than to learn to self soothe.
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Firstly you are the parent of the baby. Do what works best for your & your child. When it comes to this I feel that there is no wrong or right way
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You are mama.Don’t listen to people go by what you feel.I run to mine if they do anything.I lost one to SIDS at 7 weeks old…
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I let my son self soothe, but you need to put a time limit on how long you’re going to let them cry it out. Hardest part for me was telling myself my son is clean, fed, safe, and dry.
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They are only little once. Negative effects- co sleeping till 5, no alone time. They hang off you. But honestly breathe it in while you can. I tried self soothing. The hardest thing about it is letting them scream. But also lack of sleep was as equally hard.
Also theres a big big difference between a spoilt child and a comfortable baby. You not about to give a baby a whole pile of gifts unnecessarily like you would spoil a child.
You only making sure your baby knows they are loved and that they are still protected. If that means co sleeping till 5 to save your sanity then so be it just know the risks of sids and do so at your own risk.
Imagine being in the warmth of mum for 9 months then suddenly being made to sleep apart??
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4 kids and in my experience if you don’t let them self soothe sooner rather than later its going to be very hard on both of you in the long run.
I’ve raised 8 kids and never let any of them just cry. They are crying for a reason and they need you. Love them all you can while they are little and hold them when they need it. When they start getting mobile is when you learn how to tell them no and mean it when they start getting into things but I’ve always hated the self sooth method and 7 of my 8 are grown and doing great so you love your baby and you code your baby all you want cause before you know it they will be grown.
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Babies cry because they need something.
Whatever the something, your baby is depending on you to make it happen.
You can teach your baby to be independent and still cater to crying.
It’s your choice, 
Dont let anybody dictate how you should comfort your child or not. You go off of your instincts and do what’s best. I have a little girl whose 3 and has slept in my bed from birth. We have the closest bond ever admittedly I dont condone her crying if its for things like sweets or shes making demands but if its related to sleep then by all means Comfort. She is a clinger but i wouldnt change it because she loves me. They’ll get sick of you one day 
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Listen to your gut ! No one knows your baby like you do
If their fussing I would think give him a few minutes…but mom’s know their babies cry’s…if he’s screaming then he needs you. I personally let my baby fuss for a few minutes and sometimes he would go to sleep and other times he wouldn’t…they learn eventually! Do what feels right. But if he’s screaming for you then yes I would go to him!
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You cannot spoil your baby!! I ran to mine and picked him up every time he fussed. He is a very independent out going four year old that will tell you what he wants and how it is! He only “clings” by holding my leg when strangers talk to him, which I don’t think is a bad thing 
They are an “infant” until one year of age, and I think sometimes society forgets that. They fit in our arms for a reason, and trust it doesn’t last long. You are your baby’s mommy, you know your baby best🖤
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So what is best for your baby. People have their opinions. I’ve tried multiple things and we found our ‘norm’… There is no such thing as one size fits all parenting.
When they cry,they need you
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The pediatrician has told me multiple times to start sleep training and that my daughter is old enough to sleep in her own room (7.5 months). We’ve been bedsharing basically since day 1 and I don’t see an end in sight. I’m not gonna let my baby cry by herself when she’s happy and content in bed next to mommy and daddy. She just recently started sleeping through the night too, without any “training” or encouragement from us. I’m definitely not doing anything now that might mess that up!!
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Crying is how babies communicate. That should never be ignored.
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Don’t listen to other people it’s not there business, tell them where to go,
Your bub needs you, your suppose to run to that baby
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Omg. You comfort your baby when baby needs it. You’re teaching that baby that he can trust you to be there when he needs you. The grunting and fussing is ok to let him.try to get himself to self soothe but once baby crys he is calling on you for reassurance and comfort . There have been new studies that show it’s best to not let babies cry it out. Besides they grow up one day you’ll wish they needed you just a little longer . Your the momma you do what you need to do for your little one.
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Hey I picked my baby up every time he cried and he sleep with me till he was ready. We did self soothing at first with our daughter and it was not good for our child and she developed separation anxiety. But my son we held him when he cried and he slept with us till he was ready and we have an incredible bond
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Depends on how old. I didn’t start doing cry it out until a year old and my first started fighting sleep. Made sure she was changed,had her sippy,and soother on and laid down. She would cry and then give up and go to bed after a few minutes. Eventually stopped fighting it once learned I wasn’t going to pick her up anymore right after out her down to sleep. Can’t understand much younger than that. Need the contact.
lots of good comments about loving your baby and not worrying about what others think. I would like to add that it is impossible for a baby to be independent–until they are capable of doing things for themselves–like changing position or removing or adding clothing if uncomfortable, getting a drink or food on their own if hungry or thirsty etc. And being able to go without comfort and love is NOT a sign of independence --but is normal! When children are old enough to demand things they want --like junk food or toys then is the time to teach them they can’t have everything!
Is a personal choice for each mum. And dont let friends and family members pressure you to choose what they think best. Your the one that is raising the child and will be living with him or her as they grow up. And you need to decide what you think is best for you and bub.
Because my boy was potentially my only, I didn’t care if people though I was “spoiling” him with my attention. I was a bit more strict on him with breastfeeding, because I didnt want a baby relying on my boob for comfort. But he could rely on my company any time he wanted
Yeah there’s plenty of time in the future baby your son sometimes comfort is what they need why not give it to him. Whoever is telling you differently tell them your fuckerizing him giving him all the hugs n kisses he needs lol
Don’t let other people tell you how to parent. You have instincts and skills that they may not have. By comforting your baby when they need you, you are teaching them that you will be there for them when they need you. You are forming a bond that will be needed later in life.
i tend to my baby as he cries and he’s fine. i sleep with him in my bed also. i have since he was 10 months old… now he’s 15 months. i don’t ever let him self sooth i can’t let him just set and cry so i pick him up i’m his mother that’s what we do.
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I let my kids self soothe an had no issues at all an nothing was hard about it… It came naturally to me for them to self soothe…
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Babies don’t cry for the hell of it they cry for a reason… comfort ur baby don’t listen to those who say other wise… them crying is their way of communicating… my son is 4.5 years old he was always held, cuddled, slept with my husband and I when he was an infant he is so independent it actually drives me crazy sometimes they are only little for a short time…
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Go with your gut momma
Toddlers self soothe . Baby’s have no way of communicating other than crying.
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Your baby your rules momma. Do not listen to them because they are not the one raising you child.
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I run to my baby everytime she cries. I don’t have the heart to leave her crying. I mean let’s say I’m making her a bottle and let her cry for a second while I’m finishing up but I usually tend to her. That’s the only way they communicate
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It’s your baby, your decision!
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I kept me babies close day and night. They are now so independent, empathetic and secure.
CIO is against everything maternal. Keep them close they will need you until your gone.
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Don’t listen to people when they tell you that you should or shouldn’t be doing something.
The hardest part of it all is working out why they are crying, just do what you think is right for you both. When I had my daughter she had a very soft cry and couldn’t here her cry’s untill she was 1 and a half year old so I had to always keep a very close eye on her at all times of day and night. I had a lot of people telling me what I should and shouldn’t do but end of day it’s your baby you do what you think you need to do for your baby
Who ever gave you that advise just needs to butt out. It’s your child. I have 4 kids ages 12 to 2 I have never let any of them cio and all of them have co slept with me. Till they decided they wanted to sleep on their own. Most where between 1 1/2 to 2. They are all very independent children now.
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My question is how old? Learning to self sooth will help in the long run. Some children get very dependent on their mommies and then mommie can’t get a break or sleep through the night. You gotta do what is best for you and yours. Letting a child cry for a minute or two isn’t going to hurt them, letting them self sooth teaches different things that could be beneficial in the long run.
You have to do what your mommy radar is telling you to do. It’s your baby. Don’t be afraid to Not let your baby self sooth. When your soothing your baby you will also feel soothed.
Do what you feel comfortable with babies deserve love and attention give it to them how ever you feel is best but… just remember if your feeling overwhelmed at any time it is perfectly acceptable to take a break in another room and let them cry so long as they dont truly need something sometimes it gets rough as a new mom and it better to take a break than get too frustrated
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I did that with my daughter but she had no side effects but you do what is comfortable for you
Stop listening g to others by your instincts, babies can’t tell you anythi g they can’t talk so crying is their communication for help, babies need their mother or father close on hand,for the first 3 years in life when they talk back to you then give them a little more independance.its your baby your decision …
They grow up very fast I say cuddle with them but it’s up to you
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It’s your baby and you should do what you think is best and do what you want. I don’t regret letting my daughter fall asleep in my arms day and night. I held her all day and at night when she cried I was there to get her. And she turned out just fine. Almost 7 now and there is no letting me hug and kiss on her, she thinks it’s embarrassing 
enjoy it while they’re young!
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Do as you feel comfortable. I’ve had 5 kids and youngest being just over 2 ( she still falls asleep by me) and then moved to her crib. Our two young boys (5 and 4) were ones that didn’t sleep on there own. They turned out fine
My baby is 17 months old and I still run to him every time he cries! I just can’t help it 🤷 he cam self soothe but I just want him to know I’m always there for when he needs a cuddle. For all I know he could have hurt him self had a bad dream teeth could be hurting or just wants a cuddle with his momma!
I have been told not to do this by numerous of people but he’s my baby and if I want to comfort my baby I’m going to do jusy that! During the day I don’t give into demand of wanting to be picked up all the time but if he wants a cuddle on the sofa that’s fine! You just do you momma your baby your choice… x
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its up to dad
stop telling the mom ita JUST HER choice
daddy knows best
There are no negative effects of not forcing your child to self soothe. Babies cry when they need something even if it is just to be close to mommy. Babies aren’t spoiled by love and attention, they thrive on it.
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Nope! It’s crap! I did my best to meet his needs - shared sleep, breast fed (if you can’t a bottle is fine!), held, rocked, worn and he is independent, responsible and smart.
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Every kid need cuddling, a hold, a sense of security from us as parents…one day they’ll out grow. Bring up your kid your way. Everyone got something to say. Just do you.
If he’s an infant. No. You’re all he’s known. He should not have to learn how to self soothe or “cry it out” that young. Comfort and cuddle him all you want or need too.
If he’s a child, I wouldn’t suggest blatantly ignoring him either. If he’s upset or crying, it’s a great teaching moment on emotions and how to handle it. Even independently.
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I dont believe in crying it out at a young age you responding is how your child knows their safe and protected. My little person is 5 months ima run everytime she cries this my 3rd I did it for my other 2 and I’ll do it for all
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Do what feels right for your baby. Each child’s needs are different. My younger sister was a cryer, all the time. My parents tried to not “spoil” her by letting her cry. Turned out she had leukemia and was in pain. Pick them up, rock them, be there for them as babies.
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My second I did way different than my first. I go every time she cries, she sleeps with us and I’m there no matter what. She stops crying and knows I’ll comfort her.
Nurture your baby, I regret making my first self soothe and she never feels safe when she sleeps and wants cuddles.
I say do what’s best for you and your baby. If the baby cries respond, you can’t leave the room? Okay then don’t. Do the dishes really matter? Do you need to get up? Probably not.
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Do what you feel is best for you and your baby. Your baby being the key word here. With my daughter I coslept. She was colic and I was still a teenage in high school. With my son he slept alone. Both of them sleep alone now. I’ve always went to them when they cried especially when they were little. Sometimes I think if theres to much excitement around them then they get over exhausted and cant sleep that was about the only time I ever let my son cry it out. But even then if after 5 minutes he didnt stop crying I’d pick him up and cuddle him. You make the decision for your child in the end though.
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I do want to add though, if you ever feel the need to let him cry for just a few minutes while you step away, gather your thoughts, and just breath. This is okay and suggested! As long as he’s safe, changed, fed, etc, sometimes it’s necessary in making sure we stay sane and continue being the mom they need us to be.
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Honestly? I have a daughter that’s about to be 30, one that’s about to be 26 and I lost my son right before his 21st birthday. I didn’t do that. I had a family bed until they were ready to move on, and my oldest ended up in law school, my daughter pharmacology, and my son wanted to be a cop, in the service, or a Rabbi. You do what you feel is right. I always loved on mine when they needed it. And I don’t regret one minute.
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Self soothing in my opinion is ridiculous. Babies and kids need comforting and to know that someone is there. Each child is different but some just need a little extra. It won’t last forever. I have 4 adult daughters and each was comforted. I changed drs once when they suggested to let them “cry it out.” Not only do I think they need comforting but at the end of the day the last thing I wanted to listen to was crying. Hug those babies all you want
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Each child is different and with each child your parenting when they are little will be too. With my first two I made sure that the didn’t co sleep because I knew the habit was hard to break I had my third with a seven year gap between her and my second. She co slept and still does now on some days (she is 2 1/2) you parent how you feel you should as long as the baby is well taken care of you are okay
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My pediatrician told me the best advice one time. If your baby is crying it is for a reason. Usually to be fed or changed but alot of times they want to be held and feel safe and comfortable and that’s a super important part always of being a parent is soothing and making your child feel safe. love that baby as much as possible they grow way too fast!! Noone is a perfect parent and we all have to do what we feel is right for us. Taking advice is always good but in the end that’s your child and you raise them how you see fit! 
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Do not do this please. It’s psychologically damaging to a baby when the only thing they can count on doesn’t respond to their distress cues. PLEASE don’t.
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My children never and never will self soothe x I find its important for a child to know that if they are upset or hurt etc then mummy/daddy etc will come to them and that they are never alone x
Same at bedtime, sometimes he will go on his own but if he needs cuddles at bedtime then cuddles he has x x whoever original post is from please feel free to message me if you need to chat about it x I get stick about jt all the time but at the end of the day you are the parent and you do what you feel is best for your child xx
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It sounds like this is your first baby. you’re going to do all of that stuff. when the second baby comes along you be like that baby can cry itself out . that you know for a hundred percent sure that the baby isn’t hungry or needs to be changed or needs to be burped. Good luck
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He will become independent as he grows. An infant needs your love and support. Your his mom fallow your instincts. You can never give a baby too much love!
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Every baby is different. Every momma is different. Trust your momma’s instinct and go with your momma’s heart.
Now that my son is 6, yes, I let him cry it out sometimes. But as an infant, I didn’t. He has also co-slept with me since day one and still does.
He will grow up all too soon. Will not want me by his side all the time, all too soon. So, today, I will cherish the time I have with him. I will cuddle him.
And maybe, just maybe, this will love will carry with him all his life and remind him, when I’m not around, that he is loved and will help get him through life’s darker moments.
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Haven’t had one negative side effect with any of my kids (22, 18 and 11) I didn’t let them cry themselves to sleep. It didn’t feel right for me. It went against my nature.
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You can not spoil a baby till they understand the word no. As far as soothing that’s mommy’s job, give it all them love you can.
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I rocked my older to sleep until 2 years after that he would sleep on his own… i rock my 1.5 yrs old to sleep and i am not gonna stop until she wouldn’t want it anymore… they grow out of it way to fast and then you will miss it bad… enjoy while it lasts…
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Do what feels right. I held my babies constantly, sometimes you just need touch and to know someone is there. My kids are 9 and 4 and my 9 year old just recently started sleeping in his own bed (most nights) my 4 year old still cosleeps and likes to be cuddled to sleep. When he is somewhere else he sleeps fine alone. Both my kids are insanely independent and confident that mom is always there to fall back on if they need it. Lol they mostly like to do things themselves though. Their is no right way to parent, do what you feel is best and screw what anyone else thinks about it!
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my little boy is 6 he was a nightmare to get to sleep from newborn up until he was 2 he always needed cuddles or a bottle to help him go down and every night it took many attempts. I was all about perservering. having said all that he is very independent young boy we.alwayd had a routine with bath and bedtime and now he goes to bed great. do what you think is right. x
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If it’s a new born I reacted to her every cry and always carried her. She herself learned I would always be there and starting becoming very independent on her own.
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I never did the cry it out thing with my kids and definitely don’t regret it. I’m sure to each their own but it just didn’t fit how I wanted to parent. I also read that in the early ages, respones to their cries helps build their security for the future. Yes, this may eliminate the crying or lessen it but that’s because they learn no one will be there. Not sure how true that is but kinda makes since.
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Age sort of matters but…Comfort him. Self sooth is not the answer when babies cant talk to tell you what the problem is. If hes crying, theres a problem. They learn that if they cry, you come. How horrible would it be to need you and they have no way of getting you to come to them.
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I held my son consistently. I talked to him, read him books, played with him all the time. The more you communicate with your child the faster they learn. Do not let anyone tell you what to do. Unless it’s his Dr.
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My youngest just turned 6. She still sleeps with us. Do what’s right for you. Everyone has their own opinions. Doesn’t mean you have to listen.
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From 0-2 children are learning trust. If you dont respond and they stop crying it isnt because they’ve self soothed, they’ve just learned their needs will not be met.
Studies have been done on this, neurological studies show that the parts of the brain that fire during anxiety are actually heightened in “self soothed” babies.
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