My 7yo knows not to go through my phone… i don’t even have a password or anything still he doesn’t… you the mom…
Beat her butt and tell your husband to suck it
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Wow. Way wrong! My kids aren’t even allowed to
Pick up my phone! No way!
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You are absolutely right. She has zero reason to go through your phone. Discipline her. You dont need her father’s permission.
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Lol uh, Dont leave the phone around unlocked? Change the password? Why does she have the password if you dont want her on it?
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Take the surprise back ,and lock your phone ,go and ransack her room and read her stuff show her how it feels
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If he has trust issues you may want to check on him. I have always been taught the guilty dog barks the loudest.
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My grandsons go thru my messages. I see no problem.
I think she needs to respect your privacy
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This is why I have a code on mine. Kids don’t need to have access to my entire life.
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My 10 year old sister is like this too. I always tell her that it’s not okay.
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I have a lock code/Touch ID set up on my phone. Let me catch my daughter going through my messages…it wouldn’t be wise of her.
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What right does a child have going through an adult’s phone. That 12 year doesn’t pay the bills. Hands off I say.
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Oh heck no seems like ur 12yr. Needs to be taught a lesson! And your husband too they need to respect your privacy! Nip it in the butt now or its goin to get worse!
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This is wrong on a few levels. I mean your husband and your child.
First of all, what about respect, boundaries and consequences.
No matter what, he should have your back as a United couple of parents.
Maybe he wants her to go through your phone as a way to keep tabs on you… ?
I’d put a lock and o damn well…
until they learn to respect you as a grown woman and adult. It’s your choice if you give your husband the code, but… to keep things from a different argument, maybe consider allowing him to have the code.
Your kid has no business on your phone.
You’re not going crazy. It’s an invasion of privacy and it’s none of her business what you have in your phone.
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In no way shape or form is anything in your phone your child’s business!
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U are completely right about how u feel. My children arent allowed on my phone at all. Never. When ur married and have children u quickly realize u no longer have any private/personal things at all except phone and wallet or hand bag so I think u have every right to ur privacy on ur phone.
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She is your daughter. She has no right going through your phone. I would change my password on the phone and not give her the password. Let your husband know the password if you want but, don’t give your daughter the password. Also have a talk to your daughter about privacy and boundaries, if you don’t teach her now it will get worse to the point where she can be very controlling over her friends and boyfriends.
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Lock your phone problem solved
Put a lock on it. If hubby has issue give him password. Daughter is nosy. Daughter is wrong
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Put a lock code on it. But honestly at 12 years old she should know better than to not touch your personal belongings. My kids are 13,11 and 9 and they know that moms phone is off limits unless they have permission
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Have you tried a punishment system? 
She shouldn’t be going thru your phone. And hubby shouldn’t make it sound like it’s okay. He needs to tell her that she is not to be in your phone unless u grant permission. That’s crazy . I get your point it’s a shame that your husband is accusing u of having something to hide bc u don’t want your kid in your phone.
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Add a pin and lock your phone.
Truth is kids have no business being in grown folks business so you have a right to be upset about it.
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You are right to be upset. My son wasn’t even allowed to go through my purse. It is private tho you are not doing anything wrong it is the principle. She needs to be taught a lesson. Go through her room, wallet, backpack or whatever she has. Then ‘how do you feel about me going through your things’ ?
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Boundaries!!! Is the word.
Put a password on your phone and don’t give it to her.
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Kids do not need to read the conversations I have, it is my private business. Glad hubby and I agree on this. No one is allowed in our phones
Please set boundaries now ! Set a password and tell politely this is just wrong.
That would be like someone going through your husbands wallet! Would he be okay with his daughter going through his belongings? There has to be an agreement of privacy in any relationship.
Why haven’t you punished her for it? Sounds like you need to out your foot down, be the parent and enforce how you feel and rules. Why haven’t you added or changed the password? Because your husband will get mad or suspicious if you do? And still tell your daughter the code. IDK this whole situation feels off to me. Maybe you are hiding something, or maybe you are having a problem being the parent in this situation 
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As someone else suggested, put a new password on your phone, or even fingerprint ID if your phone allows it. If your husband want to look through it, also scan his print or give him the password on the condition he doesnt give it to your kid.
You allowing your daughter to use your phone for YouTube/games is a different matter to her going through messages and your social media.
I don’t allow my child to go through my bag or cupboards with pots and pans/ cleaning stuff she can reach, let alone my phone!
Easy. Lock it. Give SO password. Done.
Lock them all out of your phone and tell them to mind their business. Me and my husband have locks on our phones to keep everybody out, including ourselves, cuz it’s just annoying af when people go through your phone
Do you go through your daughter’s phone…if not then change the lock😀
It is absolutely unacceptable. Who the hell does she think she is. Lock your phone
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This is not ok at all. It has nothing to do with if you have something to hide or not. There will be inappropriate content that she would see. Even with the best protection there is always some disturbing stuff that could pop up even to the most innocent person. Not sure how he doesn’t see the issue here…
I would keep enforcing that it is not appropriate and if you find her looking again there will be very big consequences.
I’m a adult I have girl friends every thing I talk about is not everyone’s business especially my 12 year old childs .
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Eh 12 yrs? Oh hell no eh mama. MY 7 year old started reading my msgs whileni read them and I told her stop minding my business. This is grown folks stuff. Hubby agreed and she never repeated it. Your girl needs to know her time place
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Send a few dirty pics to your husband. I can almost guarantee she will stop when she sees those.
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Not sure how she’s getting ahold of your phone, but I’m pretty sure you’re the adult here. Lock that shit down and teach her to not only respect privacy but to respect you.
Set up a passcode for your phone. Ezpz!
Put your foot down. Don’t let your daughter be in control of you!
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Put a lock on your phone and tell her stay away from it. Your the parent here!!
Hahaha my kids are 2 and 4 and have learned. When they’ve touched my phone without my say they got their asses busted. I tell them it’s not theirs it’s mine and to leave it alone and they leave it alone. They’ve not grabbed it in a while. They’re 2 and 4 and you have an 11 year old going through yours… haha hell no. Be a mom and stand up. God this world is getting pathetic!! Parents be freaking parents and stop worrying if you’re gonna hurt someone’s feelings!!!
Maybe your husband is asking her to do it so he can keep tabs with his trust issues, and this way he doesnt look like the. Ad guy. Cuz shes the one doing it. It’s not normal for a kid to take your phone and intentionally want to read texts, vs send snap chats or try to communicate with friends. At that age I could give a crap less what my mom was doing and wanted to talk to me own friends. I would be looking more into this or asking why she wants to or feels the need to read my texts. Then go from there. Maybe remind her shes not going to like it when the tables are turned
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Sounds like he is using your kid to check up on you and what you’re saying
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She’s 12 FFS take control back.
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No you’re not wrong! I’d be pissed, I say some not so pg-13 things in my texts lol
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My kids are never allowed on my phone unless they have permission to do so. And I am usually right there watching what they do if they’re using it. As far as the husband, sounds like he’s insecure to me. My ex husband was that way 
. But if he’s so worried about what’s on your phone tell him to look for himself. The child needs boundaries and needs to learn how to give someone, especially an adult, their privacy.
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You’re the mother, she’s the daughter. Make rules. Enforce them. Take her phone (or other privileges) away and so on. Remember that you’re the parent.
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U need to put a stop to that ASAP. Ur the adult, she is the child. U deserve respect and privacy. Today it’s the phone, in a couple years it will be ur bank account and more
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That’s weird. She’s 12… old enough to know about privacy. It wasn’t a big deal for us tho… it’s basically work messages, hi and hellos… My son (he’s a preschooler) knows NOT to go through my messenger and FB. Something wrong with your 12yr old, she’s rude.
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Why do these people have your phone?
You are an adult and she doesn’t need to be going through your personal conversations. Especially about the holidays.
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Put a password on it…
She needs to learn some respect.
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Put a password on it. I would not be ok with that. Or start deleting them so there is nothing to see. You shouldn’t have to do that but it’s an option. Tell her to go do that on dads phone since he doesn’t see an issue with it.
Maybe your husband has her do it and report what she reads to him and that’s why he has no problem with it. Lock your phone. If your phone has it use the finger print lock. Then she cant unlock it.
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I would just not allow my phone out of my sight
Change your lock on your phone. And I don’t think your daughter should be going through your phone period. If your husband wants to know then I see he can because a child should never be in the middle of anything when it should be between the parents.
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You’re the parent, shes the child. Make rules and enforce them. Put consequences in place and stick to them 
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My son has to ask for mine even though he knows the password, hes 13 and knows I’ll smack the eyesight right out of him. Tell her she has to ask, tell her what she can go into, and if she doesnt follow the rules whoop that ass
Send the surprise back to the store. Change your password every couple of weeks. Put your foot down. You’re momma she is the child.
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I change my code bc my 13 year old will go in my phone. As I tell her adult business is not children’s no matter what is on there.
It is your phone and it’s your personal property. Do not let her go through your phone. It’s none of her business. Your husband is wrong! My kids are not allowed to go through my phone.
Who is the parent and who is the child here. Role reversal!!!
This seems like a really odd, toxic family dynamic. I’m sorry you’re going through this
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Get a new password for your phone
Put a lock code on it and be done. It’s yours, it belongs to you!!
Cancellé la surprise pour elle .Après peut-être qu’elle ne fouinera plus dans le cell de manan
I give my kids my phone all the time and my husband and I switch phones all the time. Our phones are not locked as if there was emergency and one of the kids needed to call 911 or for help. Plus I have nothing to hide. So it wouldn’t bother me.
Lock it w a passcode.
So, you already put a lock on it. What’s the problem? Like why does it even matter if your husband is dismissing your feelings? Honestly. At the end of the day, it’s your phone. So if you think it’s disrespectful when your daughter snoops, and you feel some kind of way about that, and you’ve taken steps to prevent that behavior, then great. Why does it matter what anyone else thinks? Is there a bigger issue here that you want to discuss but you’re not? If so, write in again and let’s discuss it.
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She needs to learn to respect people’s privacy. Lock your phone.
Doesnt you’re phone have a “lock screen” option? Problem solved.
You don’t need to unlock a phone to call 911 all cell phones you can call 911 even id they are not activated . No reason for a child to have a parents cell phone ! It’s not about having anything to hide it’s about privacy and also who’s the parent ???
No one will ever convince me that a child should be able to go through a parents cell phone .
Stand your ground and say no .
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My 12 yearold is the same and peering over my shoulder its annoying lol
I have a 11 year old son that does this to me. I see no problem with it, I have nothing to hide. If u have nothing to hide, then what are u saying about ur daughter?
You’re right. She needs to learn respect.
Sounds like your husband may be encouraging or asking her to go through your phone for you and if that’s the case this is way serious. If you dknt think he is getting her to do it then you need to stand your ground and discipline her because it is private property.
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Cancel that gift!
I hate my kids going through my phone. Do you guys not have personal conversations he wouldn’t want her to see? I know we do! My messages and content are off limits besides snap chat for their aunts and uncles.
That is NOT the same thing as HIM going through your phone…he shouldn’t be comparing that…or even thinking your hiding something or being unfaithful. Thats absurd of him. She is a CHILD. There may be t conversations you have in there that may not be appropriate or her business as a child. That has nothing to do with him. You should be allowed to have an adult level of privacy with out the kids seeing EVERYTHING! If he’s worried about something thats a whole different topic, and has nothing to do with your daughter and your phone.
This is super toxic and gross … I get not needing a lock but she should know better than to go through your text
I’ve never been allowed to touch my dads phone, I to this day won’t even ask to use his phone to make a phone call lol, I will probably have the same rule with my kids as well
My phone is locked.my husband doesnt have code either. Its MINE. I deserve privacy
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Go through her phone
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Nope nope nope. She has NO business going through your phone. She needs to learn some respect, you are her mother not a sibling not a cousin not a friend. I agree with one of the other comments that your husband is probably telling her to do it.
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Lock your phone and punish her.
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Why does she have possession of YOUR phone??? Your fault mumsie.
I agree, it’s your personal business and she needs to learn to respect it.
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Get face recognition to access your phone it’s free from your carrier.
Everyone deserves privacy.good luck.
Change your code to your phone???
I say a mother’s phone is just like a purse. I was taught never go into someone else’s purse even if they asked me too. Phone is just the same in my book. If my child wants to use my phone fine, they’ll ask first and only go into “their” apps!
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She is a child, she should stay in a childs place. I had to ask to touch my moms phone not because she was doing wrong but because shes a grown adult and I was a child who should be playing with childs things.
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Then you need a new hisband
It’s called respecting someone’s personal property. If it isnt yours, dont touch it! Is it going to be ok if she decides to rummage through your bedroom? How about if she decides to go through his stuff? Will he be ok with that? Probably not. He doesnt see it as an issue because it’s not happening to him.
Put a lock on it and share the code with your husband only 
I dont have much advice my phones unlocked but I dont ha e people just swooping it up and going threw my shit either.
I have nothing to hide from anyone my husband uses my phone if he has to go out and its dead.
Maybe get her something that’s supposed to be hers and then make her feel the way u do
Kids need boundries and need to learn respect. He needs to understand that, as a parent. Since your phone is locked, I’d just explain it to him one more time that kids have kid things and don’t always need up parents butts or in their business, and let it go at that.