Umm just wait until he hits 17
You make him pay for his own hygiene products? If you donāt make all your other kids pay for gas to go see their friends or their own hygiene products, you are the worst kind of person. No wonder heās upset, do you make him leave a dollar for every snack he eats too? Heās been in your care for 15 years, heās your kid. If you didnāt want the responsibility to act like a parent you shouldnāt have taken him in. Jesus.
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Either they all get it or they all donāt get it. End of story. If he wants extra money he can get a job or maybe advertise services in the neighborhood like cutting lawns or pulling weeds ect.
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No reason two adults should be out of work
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Well tell him when grass gets long enough he can earn money 
that go cut grass for the other s. To make money and treat the other kids same as him
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First of all how can you say heās your 15 your old if right after you follow it up with who doesnāt belong to me? You have had him his whole life and still state things that way? I think you need to really ask yourself if you should have ever taken him in the first place! Secondly I canāt believe you charge him for gas to hang out with friends I hope you do the same for he other children! Did you really think you were going to be able to raise him differently and not have struggles from him when he is being displaced from the family so blatantly? I feel awful for this child.
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Edit: I think I read this wrong. Hope I did! He can chill. As long as heās being treated like all the other kids, he can sit down. 
Youāre creating some major issues by treating your biological children different. Think this through. How would you feel?
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I understand why you explained you and hubs arenāt his bios. It was pertinent to the story because of dad and the cs. I suggest you show him where the money goes lights, rent/mortgage etc so he can understand why no one is receiving an allowance. As far as the child labor comment tell him everyone in the house does chores they just happen to get a bribe(allowance) to do so.
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Thatās why I donāt pay my kid to do chores.
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First of all why does he have to pay for his hygiene and gas to take him places? SMH. Your the parents no matter whatā¦.
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My kids do not get an allowance. I buy everything they need and/ want for the most part. They can earn money from me or other family members by doing harder chores (mowing lawn, helping with gardening). They also get to keep what money comes from their products at our yearly yard sale. But, their money pays for special things they want to do (theme parks, going to the mall, trampoline parks, etc.). Yes, we do these things as a family too, but if they should go with their friends, they need their own money. I am a single mother, working full time and in school full time. So, money is very tight, but my family and I make it work! A support team is amazing.
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Child supportā¦ Aka money to support a child that they willingly took in. Nobody would bat an eye if this was a single woman using the $80 to take care of a kid bc dad skipped out. In factā¦ Most would be screaming how much more she should be getting. So why is it not ok that these folks took in a child and are using the the child supportā¦ To support the kid???
He is being a 15 yo brat. If he wants extra spending money, tell him to start offering mowing services to the neighbors, shovel driveways, walk peopleās dogs, hell, walk older folks. There are little ways for him to make that $15
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Buy his hygiene products; clearly, you treat them differently, I agree that everyone needs to do their chores because it is everyoneās responsibility, but I donāt think that you are treating him the same way as you treat your ābiological ones.ā He deserves better and does not see how he is treated differently than the others.
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Youāve had custody of him for 13 1/2 years, heās your child. Biological or not he should be treated the same as the rest of your children. His PlayStation subscription should come out of his allowance each month just like your other kids should. Personal hygiene is a parent thing I will not expect my kids to pay for unless itās something extra they want. Gas to go places? Do the other kids have to pay for gas too?
I agree you should go back to court for more child support to help you. He deserves to be treated just like the rest of the kids in the house.
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He is your child.
I never had an allowance. Why hasnāt he got a part-time job after school, evening or weekend work?
You should not be paying your child to help around the house. If you live in the house and you are under 18, you shouldnāt be paying your way unless you work full-time but you should be completing house chores e.g washing, dishes, vacuuming, moping, lawns etc.
If he doesnāt like it he can go live somewhere else. I had my own house when I was 15, worked and studied.
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Yāall are funny. That $80 she gets in āsupportā goes to making sure he has things he needs/wants. Itās not like sheās saying she makes him buy his own stuff but that money goes towards providing for him. He is not entitled an allowance or the $80. She already said none of the kids were getting an allowance, not just him. $80 a month isnāt $hit when it comes to the expenses of providing for a child, a teenager at that. I donāt think sheās out of line at all. We donāt know the relationship between them. She could treat him just as she does her other kids but he still has a relationship with his bio father, hence why he pays support. His playstation subscription is his allowance.
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You charge your ākidsā when they want to go out or their own hygiene products? I doubt it. In fact, Iām sure you get benefits for him as well. Itās pretty sad when someone takes over someone elseās child only to make them feel like they arenāt part of the family. I think the problem is you and your husband on making a child feel obligated to pay his was because heās ānot yoursā.
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Whatās wrong with this picā¦ First off starting with he does not belong to me or my husband biologicallyā¦ WOW really like yr doing him a favor to be there instead of sayn we love him unconditionally . Iām done!!
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This whole post is just a big red flagā¦starting by saying heās not yours biologicallyā¦then proceeding to list the things you āchargeā him for that a normal child should never have to pay! 
Kids arenāt entitled to allowance. I think his obsession with money has been caused by you and the nickle and diming you do making him feel like a burden. Do you charge your biological children gas money?
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What pisses me off the most about this post is that fact that you went out of your way to let people know he is NOT yours or your husbands child biologically.
That just sounds so ignorant as to say we have had him since 18 months old but he is not ours.
I really hope you donāt treat him unfairly because heās not yours biologically.
& no Iām not talking about the allowance Iām talking about the love you give him and the guidance.
I donāt really agree with or understand allowance. Kids should do age appropriate chores around the house to contribute and learn some responsibility and independence, but I donāt think they should be paid for that. If they asked for money to go out for lunch with their friends or to go to the movies etc. then I would give that to them for something like that but I dont just give my kids money every week. As for the child support. Okay the Xbox subscription I get he could pay for that with his money but to say you use money allocated to him for things like taking him somewhere or hygiene products is not right. You took him in so you took on those responsibilities of caring for a child. If you give them all the same money every week but use his to buy basic necessities and not the other childrens thatās not right at all.
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And this is why weāve NEVER started a allowance with our kidsā¦lol They eventually feel entitled, instead of just helping out! Now donāt get me wrong do we reward our kids for helping out around the house, absolutely especially when they took it upon themselves without being asked. However our rewards is anything from a game pass, a certain toy or special treat they have been wanting, but than again they donāt get this all the time as it shouldnāt be expected. You should be wanting to help your parents outā¦
Just fyi for all the parents telling her sheās a bad parent with the child support money, its support money. The child has needs you use it for that, otherwise put it in a savings set aside for them when they get olderā¦
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Tell him to go sit his behind down somewhere and get out your faceā:joy:
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Slavery? Take him there a VM homeless shelter and see what happens when people lose their jobs.
reading is fundamental none of them are getting money. she gets 80 a month it pays for his Playstation subscription and pays for his needs so it is going to what child support is suppose to go to.
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You are treating him like a hotel guest. āheās not really ours but we make him pay for his gas and hygiene productsā. I hope you make your own children pst for their gas and hygiene products out of their $15 a week. If not, you are the worst.
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There is SO much wrong with this, and ALL of it starts where you made sure to tell us all āhe doesnāt belong to my husband and I, and we use his support money for necessities for him because heās not ours. We are just legally responsible.ā If you donāt see the problem, that you clearly see him and love him differently than you do your ābiological kidsā, no one here will be able to help.
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My boys 13 and 14 donāt get allowance. I used to give them allowance but when they did their chores they did them horribly I would have to have them re-do them so now they just do it because it their responsibility. It teaches them hard work. I have also sat down with them and explained that right now they are lucky to have a warm bed to sleep in electricity and food because things are tight. We are lucky to make our bills. So yes itās difficult to get a teenager to sit understand. Maybe sit down show them what you have each month and what it all goes to so maybe seeing it written on paper shows them how tight things are and that they are lucky for what they got.
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Tell him he can either have the playstation subscription or his allowance, he canāt have both. If he needs money or wants money, he is old enough to get a part time job on the weekends or maybe asking neighbors if he can help out with their yard work etc in exchange for pay etc.
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15? HE CAN GET A JOB if he wants $. Heās lucky to get an allowance at 15, in my opinion!
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Lol is this a joke. Youāve had him since 18 months and feel the need to specify that heās not biologically yoursā¦? How dare you.
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I mean it sounds like you make it very clear that he is not your child and that his father pays for him to live with you. So thatās probably why heās saying that stuff. He doesnāt see you as parents to him. Just let it ride out though. When you get your jobs back you can pay his allowance and when he turns 18 he can leave and you wonāt have to worry about him anymore 
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I sorry itās so hard for you right now, especially since everything is going up in pricesā¦
His best lesson would be to apply for a job to see how tricky it is to make money & pay real bills 
(his wishes are real bills/ full price counter price)
Soooā¦ show him AT 15 how to apply for jobs or go to the military recruiter & he can make ALL HIS WISHES come true 
Youāre responsible for his hygiene, and transportation. This is ridiculous
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Yea this aināt it, hon. Biologically or not, you chose to care for him which means financially support him as well. The $80 from child support is the non custodial parents HALF of the expenses, meaning the other half is your responsibility to provide. Now Iām not saying go all out and splurge that money on him, but at the end of the day it should cover half his costs for careā¦ Not subscriptions or gaming but CARE. If you choose to buy him the gaming services, thatās on you or his ability to perform character building tasks around the home. From his perspective, youāre treating him like a red-headed step child that you donāt want to care for but HAVE to. Change your mindset or donāt take on otherās kids.
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Heās a kid if you canāt handle the responsibility take him somewhere else he doesnāt deserve to deal with adult stress at 15 & you make him pay for gas Iām not trying to go to FB jail again but your clearly not the best option for him get state help for him he deserves better
There must be something in the air that parents breathe in nowadays as opposed to the ol days " mine" he lives in that house he HELPS clean that house END OF STORY AND WITHOUT BEING PAID! Ridiculous stories I read about all this ALLOWANCE shenanigans!
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Stop giving allowance even after jobs are back he is thinking a privilege is a need he donāt need the allowance not every kid gets one he needs to learn that he is lucky he gets one!
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You āchargeā him for gas for you to take him places if he wants to hang out see his friends? Wtf.
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You should not be using that money for gas to drive him placesā¦ as a parent we donāt take money from our kids to drive them places we just do it, same with hygiene products we donāt take their money for it we just buy it because weāre supposed toā¦ give him is $15.
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Do you charge your bio kids gas?
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Why does he not get treated or claimed like the other children? You make him buy his own hygiene products but not the other kids? He is 15, still a child. In going to be brutally honest- you and your husband have 4 kids total, get jobs to care for the kids! If you have a baby from 18months to 15 and you still dont claim him and treat him like your own child, why did you take him in the 1st place?
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Wow I cannot believe what Iāve just read on this postā¦why are you not treating this child the same?? You have had him since 18 months old and you treat him differentlyā¦I feel so very sorry for himā¦and you make him pay for his own wash thingsā¦and do you make the other children pay for theres to?..i find this totally shocking and heart breakingā¦shame on you!
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U make him pay gor gas to go see his friends. Wowwwww thats ridiculous
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You rewarded them then took it away of course he would be upset
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Wait so because heās not yours biologically then he gets treated different?? Thatās not right! Either they all get an allowance or none at all! Maybe lower your kids allowance $5 each that will save u the money to pay his. Maybe this is unpopular opinion but if u werenāt planning to treat him equally u shouldnāt have taken on the responsibility in the first place. I feel bad for him
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He sounds very entitled. They child support isnāt for his playstation and what not. Itās so he can have food in his stomach. A roof over his head. At 15, heās capable of getting a job in most states. Heās capable of mowing yards. Have him get a job to make his own money to pay for his playstation and his own allowance. Allowance for him is his games. Itās not mandatory. Chores arenāt to be paid. Chores should be to help the family. Iād really give him a dose of reality if he was my son.
Iād take everything away except a bed, blanket, pillow and some clothes. Everything else is a luxury
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He needs to be told exactly your financial situation. You canāt give what you donāt have. He is fortunate to have a warm home and foodā¦He needs to understand your. situation.
Good luck.
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I would take away his āPlaystation subscriptionā and make him get a job, just for the unappreciative temper tantrum.
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Sheās using the child support on HIM !! now yāall would be mad if she was spending it on her hair or nails who cares how she uses it, itās still being spent on HIM ! If she doesnāt have the allowance at the end of the he still has his hygien products probably something her other kids are going without 
I know my 15 year old ask to go out a lot more than my other kids so yes I use her child support money on gas too some of yāall act like 80$ is a whole lot of money and itās not HIS money itās HERS to use on him .
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tell him his allowance is the roof over his head food in his stomach clothes on his back shoes on his feet electricity he uses ect. as far as the chores tell him nothing in life is free n the chores is to teach him how to be responsible one day he gonna be out on his own and he gonna have to do them anyway plus more
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Yeah I think you should look into another plan for him. Iām trying to be as nice as I can here but this post was hard to read
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Lol even when I was younger I never got allowance it was either do the job or get grounded people may think it sounds mean but it taught me not to be a spoiled brat and tbh it sounds like he is already from this postā¦
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I wouldnāt let child support be a factor. In fact, my children know nothing about child support. They donāt how much their dad is supposed to pay or anything. Grown people problems are grown people problems. 
. When theyāre older and have questions, Iāll gladly talk to them about whatever. Their dad has their number. He could contact them any time he wants. I also have a child that isnāt biologically mine (as you say). We donāt discuss his biological mom either. Unless the children ask, I wouldnāt just be volunteering this kind of information if thatās what youāre doing with him. I wouldnāt even use the term āheās not biologically mine.ā Itās heās yours or heās not. You decide. But either way, stop letting the child support play a factor. If heās yours, that child support wouldnāt matter either way right?! You would still be supporting him just like the others with or without that money ?! Ok so how about not bring child support into the equation because itās not his fault if yāall arent working. It sounds like he is wanting his way but this whole post seems off. The fact that you admit youāre charging him to go to friends is really weird. Do you charge your other kids? teach him ways to earn money himself if you can. Help him get his workers permit so he can work.
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People need to read the article and know what child support is for. FIRST she stayed that they are not paying allowance to the kids that is plural. In other words NONE of the children in the household are getting allowance. SECOND child support is just that. Money to help support the child. This lady instead of lumping it in with all her finances has decided to allocate the money goes to. She is smart in case anyone wants to accuse her of using the $80 for her own or her biological kids needs. I am betting she keeps a log so if the state questions it she can show proof. He needs to understand chores are a cost of living in a household that the parents do not get paid to do. It is not slave labor to make him partake in household chores nor does he DESERVE to be paid. $15 a week is a lot to get for doing chores around the house.
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You say you give your children $15 each? If so why are you treating him differently?
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Heās 15 he can get a job! So since heās such a brat now he can get a job and cancel the subscription and learn to pay for his own stuffā¦ Biological or not heās a brat and when heās 18 he can get his own place and see what itās like to keep a roof over his head.
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First off why did you feel the need to clarify heās not yours biologically? What does that matter? 2nd, why does his personal hygiene stuff have to come out of that 80 dollars specifically? You sound petty as hell! Normally you get attached to pets, never mind an actual human youāve been raising since he was 18 months old! Thereās no budget for allowance for anyone, you could have just left it at that.
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My son has been mowing
Weāre eating
Doing stuff around the house since he was like 8 making money started mowing / weed eating when he was like 9/10 for neighbors he now makes $20 - $30 a hour weed eating and mowing for the neighbors and he buys his own gaming cards and deodorant
If we go eat thereās times he will even buy his own lunch / dinner we donāt tell him to but heās 29 now yes he is on SSI and gets money out of that as well and pays some rent
He pays the dish bill
And for his phone
Yesterday he paid for his own eye exam and. Glasses
We all wrk together and pitch in for bills Heās done that since he was like 13
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This sounds like the beginning of a Netflix documentaryā¦ My heart goes out to that poor kid.
He gets to live there for free. Chores are part of being a family. I only handed out extra cash if I asked them to do an extra job like cleaning out the garage. Tell him he should be paying you.
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He is yours and your husbands son. Unless, you dont see him as that? Call children services to relocate him someone where he will be accepted as their child. If you support children they are NOT entitled to allowance.
He sounds like he needs to earn what he gets heās sounding like a spoiled brat make him work for what he wants
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He should be treated exactly like the other children, end of story. you shouldnāt be separating him out based on what his dad pays in child support -if his dad skips a month are you not gonna buy him his basic necessities?ļæ¼
They should all get their allowance, You are making him feel like an outcast
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I canāt tell you what I would do because itās illegal in 48 statesā¦ I would start by never giving him allowance again though.
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Iām only here too say you very obviously treat him different than your other kids. Why is your kid paying you gas to go too friends houses? Why does he have to pay for his hygiene products? Thatās the job of the parents. He is 15. I have gaurdianship of my two baby brothers and my son. They all get treated the same. As someone who was treated like an extra by my step mom yāall are doing a great job at making him want to cut contact at 18.
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You all need to read it again. She mentions how all of THEM (them being all 3 kids ) get 15 in allowance. And how she told THEM none of THEM will be getting it any longer. And that once they are working again THEY will. The 15 year old is the one throwing the fit.
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Chores are not child labor, next
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Make up an invoice of alllll of the things that $80 is supposed to pay for!!!
Food, heat, electricity, internet, rent, clothes, toiletries, etc.
Then put the total that he then OWES you every month, because $80 a month doesnāt even cover the fucking toilet paper he uses!!!
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āDoes not belong to me or my husband biologicallyā
What a disgusting way of wording that
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Well I had to do chores at my dadās for free or I had to go. And I had to get a job. So tell that kid, to be happy or understand the politics of life and struggling. Bcuz he could be homeless and not have nothingā¦
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I never got an allowance as child nor did my kidsā¦no money to freely give outā¦my mom bought what we needed as the same with my kidsā¦every now and then they got rewarded with a new toy or something
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Parents shouldnāt be taking money from their kids. Why are charging him for being a parent??
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First as a parent chores are done for free. Extra stuff should some times be given with pay as a job if done well. Parent should pay for clothes top to shoes,hygiene products,food, play station is a luxury that if all kids play then they should all pitch in and pay as equally as possible. Parents are chauffeurs you do so freely. If your charging for gas then you are a selfish person and you donāt deserve them. You donāt treat any child better or worse than the other. There is no such word as step or non bio chid if you have guardianship. Get a job anywhere to make ends meet and talk to all the kids and pay for yard work, clean out garage or some other thing for allowance. Not the normal make beds,clean room,pick up clothes etc. Be fair to them all youāre suppose to be the teacher who teaches them life lessons of kindess,fairness, saving,communication,problem solving. Be a family and show that you love them equal.
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the gas thing is a bit ridiculous imo however Iād tell him that instead of you taking him places he can use that gas money as chore money same for his PlayStation subscription until you can both work Again. Also heās 15 heāll be able to get a part time job soon and earn his own money
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Wow, so grateful for the food in the belly and the roof over their headsš¤
You make him sound like his not even a part of your family feel sorry for him
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He can get a fkn job lol.
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Do this many people really lack reading comprehension skills??!!
Stop saying sheās making him pay for his own hygeine products and gas. He isnāt paying for them - itās child support money! Child support money is from the biological father, intended to be used on the needs of the child - such as hygeine products, gas, etc., to make up for some expenses that the guardians are paying out of pocket, because it is bio dadās responsibility to do so. The boy isnāt paying for the hygeine products out of his allowance. The boy wants her to give him his allowance from the child support money she receives for him ($80/month), for his NEEDS, because she and her husband are currently out of work and canāt afford to pay allowance to any of the 3 kids right now and the teen is saying they should still have to pay him HIS $60/month, from the $80/month child support.
She also mentioned that they were his guardians because it was relevant to the fact that the father pays $80/month CS, to explain what the kid is expecting of them - she wasnāt trying to say that he is not their child! She goes on to include him, when she says āwe have three kidsā, and calls him āMY 15 year oldā (aka her child)!
Heās being a teenage brat. Child support is meant for the childrenās needs, not to be given to the kid for spending money! It isnāt fair that he get allowance, while the other 2 kids donāt, just because they get twenty bucks a week for his care, from his dad.
I swear nobody can read.
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Lol my allowance was that I was allowed to live there. Chores are literally there to contribute to the household that you live in. Like is he paying rent? Electric? Internet? Food bill? No? Do the damn chores and hush. Cash was like I went and pulled weeds all day, extra stuff that constituted extra compensation. Sounds spoiled to me but thatās just me. There was no such thing as an allowance in my house growing up and there wonāt be one with my child.
Child support can go to rent, utilities, food too.
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Why the hell are you making a kid pay for his own shit like that.
You guys shouldāve never taken custody if you were going to treat the poor kid this wayā¦ā¦and your mentalityā¦ā¦ disgusting.
Jobs are hiring everyday. You may not wanna work at McDonaldās, but you can. You may not wanna work at Walmart, but you can. 
charging for gas and hygiene products is ridiculous. If you wouldnāt do it for your biological kids, donāt do it for your other child. Youāve had him since he was 18 months. Thatās your child!
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Why on earth would you need to state he doesnāt belong to you biologically whatās that got to do with living in your house hold you have raised him since 18 months and sound like you have no attachment to him at all
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I think you should treat him like your other kids and not only supply to your children with your own money but supply to him as well. Blood or not he is a 15 year old boy. Is this what he has known his whole life? Poor kid. And for the allowance thing, I would just tell them all no allowance. And they earn their meals and board through helping with chores. Also explain to them about the financial situations.
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Child support can be used to for the home as wellā¦
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Just write out a iou note for each of them in list of work they do till you get checks just they will have to take payments bills I know comes first.
I canāt believe these comments. This woman took responsibility of a child since 18 months old and all the bio dad gives is $80 a month. She was just explaining where the money goes and itās still used on him. Honey, donāt listen to these stupid women. You tell him no means no, doing chores Is him doing his part just like everyone else so he can learn responsibility. If he wants money, he can get a small part time job. Explain that part of that money goes towards his food as well. The hell is wrong with this comment section?
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First off, itās disgusting how you talk about him not being yours. You took him in, heās YOURS!
Second, regardless if yāall give them an allowance or not, how aboutā¦yāall go get a damn job!!! Thereās a help wanted sign in every damn business window I see.
First off if a child lives in ur house, u feed said child, u cloth said child, u take that child places, said child has lights to study by, said child has warmth or coolingā¦. Then said child does need an allowance. It is stupid that parents feel that they must pay a child to do chores around the house.
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Itās a no brainer. Tell him to get a job.
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His support is first to keep a roof over his head so he will just have to make due with having a home , food and power for now .
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A childās allowance is allowing him to live in your home. Feed him. Clothe him. Child support is for care and maintenance of the child. Which is what youāre doing now. Maybe he needs a reality check.
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If youāre his legal guardian, he is your child, same as the others. Please stop treating him differently. He should get the same treatment as the others, regardless of Anything. Way to single him outā¦poor boy 
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ā¦.what is this world coming to 
What got me is him paying you gas
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BAHAHAHAHAHHAA that kid needs a reality check 
I never once got āallowanceā my allowance was being able to go places and do things and hang out with friends. YOU are the adult and the legal guardian. I guarantee a social worker would tell him to get over it $15 he is mad he doesnāt get a measly $15 for washing HIS dishes and making HIS bed and doing HIS laundry you donāt get paid to do those things when you move out, you have to PAY to do those things when you move out. He will be fine, just having a teenage āthe world should revolve around meā moment
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Okay lemme get this straightā¦ heās not yours but you use the money his dad sends for things that arenāt even a necessity for the child? Ps4 subscription and gas?
Do you make your other children pay you gas money to take them to see friends?
Cause thatās a little bit ridiculous if you ask meā¦
May be time you and your partner get some jobs if you cannot afford the expense of children that youāre using part of the child support for gasā¦ thatās just weird.
Child support goes towards the child and their needs. Not your ownā¦
Stop giving out allowance in general. If you canāt afford it donāt do it.
Instead of paying them for doing daily things in life that you wonāt get paid to do when youāre an adult, do chores first then fun time later (hang out with friends, play games etc etc)
No play if the work aināt done.
And if youāve had him since he was 18 months oldā¦ he is yoursā¦ blood related or not.
Youāve raised him this far. Donāt make him feel like an outsider by making him pay gas money and no one elseā¦
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What a dumpster fire
You take money out of child support to drive him places!?
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I feel sorry for the boy because he knows heās not part of their family, itās not fair to the child , he didnāt ask to be there, so you could at least treat like a part of your family . Stop being so disgusting , and at least love him.
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