I agree with the supportive comments here. Make sure she’s SAFE and taking care of herself.
Please ignore the shameful comments. Doesn’t matter if you or anyone else thinks it’s “ick”. Being judgmental is going to shut that door quicker than anything. Despite what some people are insinuating on here, having multiple partners doesn’t make you immoral or a bad person.
Ok, not good. You need to talk to her - quickly. Explain the consequences of her actions, her risks (STDs, child, reputation) and talk to her about her self esteem. Is she Looking for Love in all the Wrong Places because she’s not confident and getting her validation from the boys? Is there a trustworthy male in the family who can explain what she’s doing from the male perspective. (We know she’s being used, but when you hear that truth from a guy you trust, it really sinks in. Daddy explained that truth to our daughters and it hit home.) Good luck, sister.
I use to be 16 and snuck out at 12 midnight and would come back at 6am before any would wake up I would definitely talk to her and tell her about the risks of STDs and also talk to her about loyalty and karma. Maybe also tell her she doesn’t need to sneak out and ask her if she wants a ride or something idk my parents ended up putting me in a foster group home when k was 17 because I kept sneaking out and then emancipated as a former foster youth
I would talk to her. And let her know that you know what’s up. Don’t be confrontational. That will just make her on the defensive and not want to talk to you. Make sure she’s being careful and is safe.
Let her know she doesn’t have to sneak. Let her know you care, want to know who she is with and that she is safe , loved and accepted.
Talk to her…let her know she can come talk to you about ANYTHING! And put her on birth control!
If you know where she’s at and she’s out after curfew have an officer pick her up bring her home. Tell her your disappointed. You will talk later. Extreme I know. Worked on my daughter
And ask her if she has any questions and if there is anyone she would be more comfortable talking to if not you. It might hurt your feelings a little but it could definitely help your relationship if she knows you are a safe place
Ohh shizzzz mama … good luck , get your girl on the rods at the very least z the rest well its her path you can only but guide xoxooxox
You don’t say how she is escaping, years ago my son was sneaking out thru his window, so I locked the window after he left. Next time he went out the back door and I got up and looked the door, when he knocked on it to come in I handed him a blanket and told him to sleep in the yard.
This opened the door for conversation.,
Talk to her and inform her of all the dangers. Especially with multiple partners
I would first recommend praying! Pray safety over her and have faith that she is going to be ok.
I used to sneak out every single night as a kid, it was like a drug, it gives a rush like being drunk or high without the harsh substances.
When my dad found out we were sneaking out through the window he closed it on us. Then we knew when we got home we were in trouble. People say it’s normal at that age… but to be honest, it’s really not. Me, my sister and cousin were the wildest girls in our school at the time by far. Not proud of it, just saying. None of the other girls we’re doing what we were doing and some of them even got mad at us for it.
I would recommend putting alarms on the doors and windows. Talk to her and tell her that what she is doing is absolutely not an option. If she wants to see boys she can do it the normal way and ask permission first and be back at a reasonable time. Also counseling maybe?
I would definitely confront her! And also have a long discussion about birth control,keeping her body count low, self respect, and being safe. It may be uncomfortable and emotional but you gotta do it. Because if left unchecked it could go from 2 boys to 4 boys and a baby. I would also gently but firmly (to start) discuss the morals you’ve taught her and what is/is not acceptable for people in your house.
I got caught sneaking out as a teen. My parents put up a motion detector with a laser light outside my window. The first night they had it up I crept out of my window to be met with what I thought was a gun with a laser point 
, needless to say that scared me shitless and I went straight back in my window only to be met by my seriously pissed parents. I was mortified and incredibly embarrassed that I got caught. I did not sneak out again.
Not promoting scare tactics, but in some cases it does work.
I hope you can get this figured out! 
Support her, set boundaries and actively listen to her. Be her safe space to come to. Don’t hold on too tightly or pass judgment bc that will push her away and make her feel like she can’t trust you. You don’t want that.
Have a honest no judgmental conversation with her about what she’s been doing lately, the good, bad and consequences of this behavior. She needs you to be not just her mom but her friend too.
Umm yea she is your child confront her. It’s going to keep happening the longer you let it go.
Birth Control. One that she doesn’t have to take everyday because she’ll “forget” depo any option where you take it and you’re good for a while.
Take it from a woman who had her first baby at 14 
First, be practical. Get her on birth control asap. Take her to talk to her doctor about the best option for her.
Confront her esp about the dangers of it all
Alarms on the windows and doors hasn’t crossed your mind? You don’t know what to do? Taking her access to social media away?
16 year olds need freedom but she can’t be sneaking out. Write her a letter that you know. Leave some condoms and let her know she doesn’t have to sneak out and that you’d like to make an appointment for birth control. If she’d like to than she can go on proper dates and have proper privacy. But that ya’ll do need to talk first about the seriousness of the situation and how to stay safe and respect her body. We can’t stop it. We can only educate and lay boundaries.
I’d confront her. Especially knowing she’s hooking up with multiple partners. Ick. Get her to a Dr and on birth control. I’d also talk to the other boys parents.
Yes you confront her… She’s sneaking out…if you don’t you are allowing it.
You need to educate her about sex, sex trafficking, drugs, all of it. The best gift you can give her is knowledge. When confronting her, don’t get mad at her because that will just push her away. Explain to her that she is making adult choices and could have adult consequences for it. Try to get the bottom of why she is sneaking out and hooking up, there is most likely something lacking in her life to make her feel like she needs to do that. Behavior is a form of communication.
Talk to her. Get her on birth control and talk about safe sex. Let her know that she can’t sneak out. The world isn’t all unicorns and rainbows and if she sneaks out and something happens to her you’ll waste time trying to find her if she’s in trouble bc you won’t know that she’s gone. Honestly, research how many young women/teen girls have gone missing and show her that dangers.
Give her a curfew and tell her that she has to be back by that time. Consequences if she doesn’t. I’d also put up a security camera from wherever it is she’s sneaking out from.
Confront there mothers … most boys will listen to there mother and if they don’t …confront the boys and tell them if they lay a finger on your daughter they won’t have fingers … either way your daughter has made her decision to do it and hopefully she won’t end up pregnant or worse be the parent not the friend
Meet her at the door as she is planning to sneak out. Ask her to meet the boys. She might not feel comfortable coming to you about dating or anything having to do with relationships. I know I didn’t want my parents involved in my relationships at all.
Or push comes to shove when she does sneak out call the police and tell them you woke up to find your daughter missing. It will flag her in the system until she is 18 as a flight risk and the police.
My sons idea of sneaking out is to go out his window and come in the front door to try and scare me and then tell me how he went out his window to do it. When we noticed he was doing it a little too much and was comfortable with it. We would lock the doors so he wouldn’t be able to get inside. Scared the heck out of him and he immediately stopped.
Your the parent! Sit her down and talk with her…be open and honest Prevent a disaster from happening she is still young!!
You should talk to her. Talk about birth control, STI prevention, etc. Go get her a full panel test too so she’s in the clear. I say full panel because if you’re US based, the basic panel doesn’t include testing for HSV strains and those strains are the easiest to pass around and keep forever.
Omgoodness! I know you are freaking out! BIRTH CONTROL ASAP! Inplanon (4 year arm implant) or Mirena (8 year IUD)
Don’t scream at her or go crazy. Just sit her down and tell her patiently and quietly that you know what she’s doing and who she’s doing it with. Explain the consequences which will be if she comes home pregnant she’s on her own in the streets.
Of course your not likely to do that to her, but convince her that you will. Maybe, just maybe that will scare her into stopping
Explain the dangers. The risks. And educate her on safety and being treated respectfully. Talk about being safe maybe look into birth control. Unfortunately she’s going to find a way to do things she’s already doing things. At least make sure she’s being safe.
My dad would’ve surely confronted me and I guarantee as rowdy as I was I would not have went against it. Things has changed when we ask as parents if we should confront an underage girl that’s in danger. I’d definitely be putting her on a birth control shot where she couldnt miss any, but if I had to nail windows shut and become night security she would follow my rules and graduate school. Otherwise she would be put in a facility that could. Boys talk and it may not be those 2 boys that end up hurting her. She needs mom to make sure she doesn’t ruin her life, get hurt, or worse. I had 4 boys and best believe I would’ve found them and they would’ve walked home with me driving behind them (the longest possible route), then they would’ve washed walls for days. This is so dangerous, especially for a young girl.
My son snuck out one night. Let’s just say he never did it again.
Your the adult, she’s the child
Start buying some diapers and things that YOU will need to raise your grandchild.
Get her on birth control ASAP!
I can’t picture my mother simply asking a social media group about what to do after finding out I’ve been hooking up with 2 guys. But sadly this is the reason why you’re dealing with what you’re dealing.
Gently parenting has disappeared and it has been replaced by permissive parenting. Moms scare to death to discipline their kids, trying way too hard to be their best friends.
Believe me you shouldn’t be scare of confrontation with your 16 year old daughter. It sounds like she has way too much time in her hands, she wants to act like a grown woman, she needs to be treated that way. Delegate chores at home, demand good grades, set expectations.
It’s been proven than when the kids act with this amount of disrespect is because their parents have failed as leaders of the house.
Say whatever you want but this generation could use a bit of a stern hand.
As her PARENT yes confront her and put rules in place and get door/window alarms and locks so she cant sneak out as easily. Safe sex talk is desperately needed too. What else are you planning to do? Just ignore it?!
I’d give her the safe sex talk and id also tell her next time she sneaks out that you will be calling the police about a runaway simply for her safety🤷♀️ I used to be that teenager at 14 and I’m lucky I didn’t get snatched with how the world is. I’d also give her a big talk about predators and tell her that’s the only reason you’ll be calling the police next time she sneaks out at night.
Put her on birth control and find out if she is using protection and get serious with her about using protection. You can’t stop her but you can educate her.
The moment that you’re afraid of your child, you’ve lost control. My mom was afraid of me and it was all bad, I made the worst decisions. You can’t be afraid, you must confront her as you see it happening.
when i was 16 i snuck out all the time to meet up with boys. i would let her know that you know- and help her be safe about it. i wouldn’t fight her on it bc it would just make her want to do more… i am now 30 with two young kids and DREAD that talk.
You better confront her before you end up with a teen mom…
Alarms on the windows, my dad ended up screwing my windows shut😂
I’d give her the talk, get her protection and talk to her about it all unless you want a pregnant girl on your hands
Well unless you want to be a gran when your daughter is 16 or having her all kinds of transsexual dieses last time I checked you are the mother put your foot down. You do have that kind of power to do so. If I were I would take control of the situation before its way to late.
My daughter did it but my husband discovered, in the middle of the night, that she was gone, so he waited for her on her bed. She agreed not to do it again if he didn’t tell me. He did suggest to me that she should be on birth control, which I was against, but we did eventually put her on it and the pediatrician talked to her. I didn’t find out about her sneaking out for a couple years later.
People acting like this is normal is the problem. This isn’t normal or typical!
Welcome to being 16 Honestly just talk to her about the importance of safety, take her to go on BC, and give her a safe place to come to and talk(or whatever she needs at the time).
Teenagers are(can be) sneaky. I know that I was a sneaky a$$ teenage “girl”(I’m a trans man which is why girl is in quotes), but I also didn’t feel like I could talk to either of my “parents”. By 16 I was smoking(both cigarettes and weed), drinking, and sleeping around all behind their backs…
Cracking down on rules are just going to cause her to balk and rebel against you and your rules (pretty sure it just comes with the territory of the age ).
ABSOLUTELY say something to your daughter but DONT go into accusatory or attack mode. That will get you no where with a 16 year old. Have a calm discussion about practicing SAFE sex (birth control and condoms). Shes going to be legally an adult in 2 years (assuming you are in the US) so you need to prepare her for that.
Get her on birth control & give her condoms ASAP.
She’s gonna be knocked up soon…
Unless you want grandbabies, you are the parent.
So your 16 year old is doing this and your afraid to ask her about it? 
why are you afraid to discipline?
Birth control and have a appropriate talk about safe sex.
I dont understand why parents are afraid to be parents!
Time to fear monger her about STDs. Stress the importance of using protection! Some people are so focused on getting their kid on birth control! It gives them a false sense of security. Yeah, it may prevent a baby, but you’re gonna have a bumpy fire crotch for the rest of your life! USE PROTECTION!
If you don’t lock the window and swap the locks real quick while she’s gone 
Make her watch Megan is missing! Will make her think twice about sneaking to meet anybody
I would confront her, talk to her about being safe and all that and then personally I would put her on birth control and install locks on every exit and window 
Time to get a ring camera in an alarm take her phone at night
Go to the health unit and gets the pamphlets you need for birth control and std information. Leave it in the bathroom where she’ll find it. And say nothing. She’ll ask. You didn’t say anything and the papers aren’t hers. At least she’s informed and she then knows you know without an huge argument because she tries to stand up for herself as a person coming into age type thing.
If she doesn’t say anything you could make some excuse for her to go to a doctor and she can then ask without you there. Make sure the doctor tells her you won’t know.
Or confront her and Wing it
Or try one etc.
hugs
Better say something before she ends up a teen mom or have an std you cant get rid of
I was this girl just about 8 years ago. My parents were strict and never really let me do much or go anywhere with anyone so it started to make me want to rebel and sneak out… nowadays I think back to those times where I was out there alone, walking home alone etc. and you just cannot do that. these days it seems everyone is so dangerous and anything can happen in a split second. After my parents found out I was sneaking out they gave me a curfew finally and they just needed to know where I was planning on going and who with. And lemme tell you after I got that little bit of freedom after not being able to do much of anything. I stopped sneaking out and I was much safer in the end. Personally I feel like the more of a reaction the parents give determines how things are going to go… you don’t want to blow up on her but I’d try and understand her and talk about it and just make sure she knows why it’s so dangerous etc.
We went through something similar with our 15 yr old. It’s important to find out WHY they are doing this. Counseling has helped soooo much! And we have to be sure they are being safe!
Do not chastise her, as a teenager who did similar things… i can promise you that will drive her to continue on a tangyn. Give her access to do it safely - talk to her about appropriate times/places, access to a full health check, birth control and protection for sti/stds. Educate her on the safety concerns and appropriateness! You got this Mummah. Any time is appropriate provided its in private with just the 2 of you, and please dont tell everyone her business within her circle, she will resent you for it!
I used to this myself, parents tried to stop it, I just figured out another way. It didn’t work out well as I was introduced to drugs and alcohol, and got a really bad reputation… which only made it worse. It took a very long time to recover from all I was exposed to… if she won’t talk to you get an older sister, aunt , family friend anyone she will talk honestly to. Counseling helps alot. Also I had a thought, she did to watch a few crime shows where they tell what was actually dont to these girls, true stories maybe that would help her understand what can really happen. Prayers for both of you…
Get an alarm system. That’s why I got one. Incase my kids decide to do this in the future. And honestly just talk to her and be open. So t yell at her but talk to her. Explain the dangers and offer birth control.
For sure confront her and let her know straight up that you know and have a talk with her about concent and safe sex and maybe look into the depo shot for her that way you are not raising your grandchildren let her know that she can come to you when she messes up but also give her a curfew and rules to follow because most towns do have a curfew for under age kids tell her if she’s going to go places she needs to tell you where she’s at and not lie tell her to keep her location on so you can see where she’s at tell her there is only 1 get out of jail free card and that’s it if she wants to try things like drinking because all teens will at some point have her do it at home or tell her if she drinks at a party she’s not aloud to get in any vehicle with anyone and to call you when. She needs picked up or she can stay the night where she’s at 
honesty on her part is key if she wants to be trusted she needs to earn it by being honest and open with you and that’s asking the bare minimum from her
You better talk to her pretty quick. Chances of her not getting pregnant are pretty rare. I’d put in an alarm system, so she can’t sneak out as easily . You just need to tell her what she’s doing is dangerous, and I’d get her on the pill or patch.
Birth control. Whether you can get her to stop sneaking out or not, if she’s sexually active then she should be on birth control. And whatever you do, don’t shame her for being sexually active. Educate her on the dangers of diseases and teach her that the boys need to wrap it, every time, the whole time. Even if she’s on bc.
When it comes to actually sneaking out, talk to her about it. That’s a breech of your trust and that isn’t okay. Don’t be hateful or condescending because that can get you opposite results, but a discussion and new rules in place could be beneficial. Also a security system could be a good backup… she can’t sneak out if every time she tries to open a door or window an alarm goes off. Good luck momma.
Confront her and both the boys, if you want answers you gotta go get them!
Remind her the dangers of stds, get her on the pill… there ain’t much else you can do, she will do it anyways. Just have a talk with her about being safe
The lack of parenting is the issue. You know about it and still haven’t done anything yet. These comments are having you be her friend, not her parent. “Sit down and talk to her.” Ummm no! She’s 16, sneaking out, and hooking up with two boys! She needs a rude awakening
My step-dad caught me sneaking out & shut my window , made me knock on the door lol get an alarm system installed, you can add windows to them. But it’s also clearly time to get her on birth control. I’d say an implant since you can’t trust a 16yr old to take the pill responsibly. And it might be time to discuss boundaries & rules, expectations & such but you’ll need to give a little to get a little
Make sure she has birth control.
Don’t know what to sayyy !? Yes you confront her , yes you have that talk ! This is not cool and she’s being used . She’s worth so much more !!!
What if she gets pregnant.
Paraguard… it’s 10 year birth control with no hormones. As long as she’s not allergic to copper. All emotions and opinions aside. She will go about her life through college and past… then have a say about her reproductive Life when she is ready for other options
Hooking up with both boys!..you have more problems then her sneaking out…I would have a long talk with her about self repect and get her on birth control.
Definitely confront her before you end up with a grandchild.
One rule in my house with my teens: don’t lie to me. What teenager ever stopped making stupid decisions because a parent “talked it out”. I know I didn’t. Told mine all the time, any sneaky thing you are conjuring up… I already did it and wrote a book about it. You think she doesn’t know sex makes kids and causes STDs? Of course she does, but like most teens she 1. Doesn’t care and 2. Thinks she is immune.
Is running her down and getting the Depo shot the answer? Birth control has it’s own set of consequences.
Put a stop to this immediately, I am more of the show up at the party location type. I’d give both boys a ride home and make sure their moms and dads are in the know. Then mine, well, now she would get to earn my trust all over again. You want freedom? Earn it. And when she earns it, give it to her, make it achievable.
Take her to the doctor and ask about birth control. Explain that having sex with two people is dangerous and not responsible. Sit the boys down n front of her and tell them all you know and are not approving.
Confront her. As long as she is living under your roof and you are responsible for her, sneaking out is totally unacceptable. Explain the dangers and the possibility of pregnancy. Let her have the boys over during normal hours. She needs you to be her mom and not her friend. Teens need boundaries and need to know what will happen if those boundaries are crossed. You must stick to the consequences you lay out to her otherwise they mean nothing. Friendship comes later when she is an adult. My 2 girls had strict rules about what was expected. They are now in their 30s and we have a great relationship. They are grateful for the boundaries placed. Also talk to the boys’ parents. They might not know what is going on. Parenting teenagers is not for the faint of heart. I wish you good luck.
This is where you educate her on the dangers of sex, stds, pregnancy etc. get her on birth control. It won’t stop her, but you can help her make more informed, educated decisions…
Definitely let her know it’s not acceptable and you aren’t naive to what she’s doing. Put alarms on the doors and windows, check where she’s going, keep tabs on her. Be over bearing, be the reason she thinks twice about hooking up. She’s going to get a bad rep and it’s going to crush her. Be her protector. Also educate her about sex and what can happen. You can’t stop her, but u can sure try.
Of course you confronts her. She’s a minor and you are the parent. Let’s her know you will not tolerate that behavior and let her know what troubles she can get into. Parents today act as tho they are afraid of their kids. She needs to know who has authority in your house.
Honestly it would be a convo in the car on the way to the doc for birth control. Like safety is the biggest thing here.
Um yeah confront her asap set rules and consequences if u can tell these boys 2 stay away from her…if u don’t do & say something she’ll keep doing it & think it’s ok
I would sit her down and talk to her about safety. Not only the dangers of meeting people online, dangers of SA etc, but also give her some condoms or ask if birth control is something she’d like to think about. Teenage pregnancy is real and not cupcakes and rainbows. Show her a birthing video so she FULLY grasps what getting pregnant leads to.
At least, that’s what I needed as a teen doing the same things behind my parents backs
This was her friend btw. Terrify her
How is she sneaking out? Window, door, etc? Lock the window where it doesn’t open & deadbolt the door. And don’t tell her. She’ll know you know the next time she tries it… that will likely start a dialogue. Do you know these boys? If so, maybe a parent powwow is in order. If not, I’ll bet you the school counselor knows who they are & can call a meeting. I’m assuming they go to school. Mom, let me tell you this… you need to get a handle on this or you are going to have a deseased ridden daughter or worse yet a dead daughter. Sorry to be so cruel but…
I snuck a boy into my room where he stayed for DAYS. One morning, my mom overheard us talking, waited until I left for school, went back to the house, kindly confronted the boy, bought him breakfast & took him home.
She never said a word to me about it.
He told me later that day & also told me he wouldn’t ever do it again.
My point in all that is to say- sometimes its advantageous to go directly to the source.
Also, everyone’s telling you to educate her, get birth control ect. (And they are right) but also set boundaries for what you will, and will NOT tolerate.
You can’t keep her from “growing up” but you can decide how you will respond & actions have consequences.
Best of luck.
Of course she needs to know you know. Before you do ask yourself what you were doing when you were 16. I know what I was doing and what you fear is going on is fairly typical teen behavior. To decrease some of the danger have a heart to heart talk with her. If you know where she’ll be and she knows to call you if she ever feels unsafe, that will reduce the danger significantly. Discuss substance abuse vs risky behavior, importance of safe sex and her choices if a pregnancy happens. Most of all she needs to know how very precious she is to you and how much you love her. This does not mean she is a “ bad” girl, she is just craving excitement and thrills… unfortunately less appealing things can occur which teens think never will happen to them.
Coming from experience, as I was 13 when I was hooking up.
Confront her. But do not freak out on her. It will only make it worse and make her want to rebel more. Which is never a good thing.
Talk calmly to her, let her know that you know what’s going on and that you want to make sure she’s being safe. Have the safe sex talk, even if you’ve already had that talk before this, do it again.
Possibly get her on birth control. Buy condoms.
Unfortunately, with her age, it won’t just stop. You just have to make sure she’s safe about it.
I’m gonna add onto my comment:
If you have to, do the whole “this is your brain on drugs” but “this is your body if you’re not safe” if that makes sense. Show her pictures of stds and everything that can happen if she’s not safe. If her seeing stuff like that makes her uncomfortable, I’m sure she will be safe because she will definitely realize she doesn’t want any of that to happen to her.
Get cameras for ur house. Then she knows when u kno when she’s leaving ur cameras will go off and then u will be “ stopping her” before she gets far. But sit down with her before u get them talk to her and then tell her the plan. It’s about safety
You are first the parent and then the friend. As a parent you need to set boundaries. Sneaking out is disrespectful to you and your house. I would definitely put her on birth control and have a talk with her about 2 boys and stds.
I don’t understand your comment that you don’t know what to do. Of course you know what you have to do. The next time your daughter leaves and comes back home, be there to greet her. Let your daughter know you’re aware she’s been sneaking out at night to be with different young men. Let her know it is dangerous to be out alone at night. Ask her if she needs your help getting on birth control. Since you know her hot buttons, figure out a way to ask if she’s using drugs or drinking while she’s out with her friends. Ask her to bring the young men around for pizza so that you can meet them.
I saw a post that mentioned changing the home so that she can’t get out at night the same way she’s been getting out now. You’ll have to do more than alarm the windows, you know. You’ll have to convince her to cooperate and to obey your rules. If she doesn’t, are you willing to do some tough love? Send her to spend a couple of weeks with her grandparents for a cooling off period? Once a teenager starts being sexually active, you aren’t going to get her to quit so set your expectations accordingly.
Are you ready to become a GrandMa?? And raise another child ?? Thats where you’re going…
My parents never gave me an option to sneak out. All I had to do was tell them I was leaving. They knew I was up to no good (I never once touched or tried any drugs, and have never smoked weed) but I was likely out to meet boys. They educated me on safe sex, on protection of all kinds and I knew that they were just one phone call away.
This is why, because if something happened to me, they wouldn’t just think I was in bed. When I told them I was leaving, they didn’t sleep as hard, they were aware I was gone. They knew damn well that regardless of what they said, I was going to find a way, so they compromised and it honestly was the best system, in my opinion. My parents and I are extremely open with each other, I tell them anything, I dont fear getting in trouble (or scolded now as an adult) and we just trust each other - and that was so huge for them (and me) as a “rebellious” teen!
Many people don’t agree with this, but it truly worked for us.