They’re gonna do it no matter where they go, if that’s what they’re wanting. I would let her, she’s technically 18, and as long as theyre being safe. I’d rather my daughter feel safe under my roof, than out god knows where.
Stopping him from staying won’t stop what they’re doing. Talk about your concerns and why you are worried. Also discuss birth control. If you shut her down or it this issue causes arguments. she will be less inclined to come to you in the future
I would say since she’s 18 she can go get a hotel room. That way you’re comfortable you know where she is you know that they are safe right? And they can have the freedom to roll around however they want to. And also it doesn’t feel like so much disrespect to the house.
They might not actually want to have sex whike being at your house, they could just want to spend some time together and wake up together, it’s harder than you think to have sex in your parents house knowing that your around, but I guess if it’s about sex at least she had the respect to ask you if he could. sleep over, she could of tried to sneak him in, talk to her and be honest
I was engaged and didn’t sleep in the same room with my fiancé on a vacation, its really about respect in my opinion.
No. If they are not married, they are not having sleepovers under my roof. I’m an advocate for abstinence, so I would have the talk with my daughter about waiting for marriage or if she is going to be having sex to use protection, but I won’t make it permissible under my roof
Once you give them permission it will continue. There may be other boys if this doesn’t work out. So be ready. I speak from experience.
If she want a sleep over and she is grown. She can pay for her own place and have fun then.
It’s hard to see them grow up…she’s 18 and technically an adult…let it happen and remind both of them to be responsible
You don’t mention if there are younger siblings in the house. It is true that if she is asking if her boyfriend can spend the night they are already having sex. So if he does or doesn’t spend the night that won’t change. Just that if you let him spend the night the younger siblings will expect you to allow their girl/ boyfriends spend the night too
1 Like
They will have sex with out without your consent. Better off to make sure she had birth control and protected and safe
1 Like
My 14 year olds boyfriend stays over but he lives over an hour away they sleep separate obviously but it’s all about trust
She will either have sex in her bed at home or somewhere else maybe not as safe. I know what I would rather
Separate rooms! That’s what my mother did. No unwed daughter of hers was going to share a bed w a man under her roof!!! 
It worked!
I would make her wait just to be sure it’s what she really wants and also give me time to accept it’s the right thing to do
NOPE! Remind her of all you probably have ever told her before regarding disease, pregnancy,and emotional repercussions. She will still probably sleep with him (prob already has) but it won’t be under your roof or with your blessing.
The quick and simple answer is no. As the parent and adult you do not owe her any further explanation
Life happened, and I had to move back in with my mom…needless to say i’m 30 and my mom won’t let me have boys over. Lmao
Instead of trying to prevent it just make sure they’re protected I told my daughter I’d buy her condoms anytime
Hell no. I just went through this with my 18 year old and no man is gonna stay over. They want to be grown and these days they throw up in your face “I’m 18” show respect for yourself and your daughter tell hen NO!!!
Your house, your rules. If it is not ok with you, then tell her that. If she doesn’t like the answer, she is 18, she can get her own place.
2 Likes
it’s ur house and u don’t have to allow it in ur home ! Tell her no if u want but I’m saying I wouldn’t allow my child to do that in my home , but I wasn’t stupid enough to really think it wouldn’t happen somewhere else anyway !
I too was pregnant at 18 but. My daughter is the best thing to ever happen to me and open door honesty policy is a strong one I believe in
It’s your house your rules bottom line. But I will say, even more so at that age, a sleep over is not going to be the determining factor on if they have sex. They either are already, or they aren’t. If they aren’t, they aren’t going to just because they spend a night together under your roof. If they are, they’ll just do it whenever they have been anyway. If she feels you’re being too overprotective, it could push her to make some hasty decision about trying to move out on her own or with him.
I have an 19 year old boy, his gf has stayed over a few times. They are still both pure lol but the way I look at it I would rather them be safe in my home or her home when it does happen. People go on about respect thing but tbh I have sex with my husband in my house and my kids live here soooooo 
. It’s either they are safe and with protection or in some Sleepy motel or perhaps a car with no protection. People seriously need to choose their battles here.
Can always do what my mum did when I was 18 she aloud my boyfriend to stay just not aloud any where near my bedroom
That won’t mean that away from your home they won’t have sex. But if you give that ok for your home. It’s the same as saying that you approve.
1 Like
Campermize with her let he stay over just not in the same room and if there in her room door stays open
I’d rather them at home in a safe environment
1 Like
Borrow some kids /family members little kids even babies and have them “preoccupied” babysitting kids and babies lmao!
1 Like
I stayed over at my boyfriends house a couple times at that age. We all (the teens-I was friends with his sister) slept in the living room.
To be honest if you say no to her she just might take it somewhere else and spend the night… At least if she’s in your home you can monitor some things. Just a suggestion
Also just because she’s open and asking for permission doesn’t mean it’s a green light to say yes - you take the opportunity to educate her on why it’s not right. Use that open communication to explain your own reasoning.
Would you rather she be open with you and discuss staying safe and if they do sleep together, be in a safe environment? Or would you rather they take risks, hide the reality from you and be potentially having sex in an unsafe place? Thats basically choice you are making.
1 Like
It’s your house, your rules. When she has her own place and is paying her own bills, it’s her rules.
I had sleep overs with boyfriends at a young age. Always slept in separate rooms. As a parent I would most likely do the same thing, as long as I liked the boyfriend lol. At 18 I was married and living with my husband across the states so I may not have ended the way some parents would want Lol
It is setting a precedent and expectation - I would say no 
she might not like it but that’s ok, she’ll appreciate it later in life
1 Like
I allowed my daughter to have her boyfriend to stay but I slept in the bed with them, if ya call it sleep.
1 Like
Id make sure they were being safe but 18 is an adult & id set some rules & let her.
Get her on contraception. Shes 18. Yes it would be awkward but at least she’s in the safety of her own home
That’s going to be a no from me dawg. My house, my rules. If you don’t like it, move out on your own.
The fact of the matter is that there’s a possibility of them having sex whether he stays the night at your home or not. Ask if they’re sexually active, and if so, explain to her about getting on birth control, and if she’s willing, then when she starts to take it, then allow him to stay over. But not letting him stay over isn’t necessarily going to prevent them from having sex. Not to mention, if she were away at college (which is realistic at her age), you would have no control anyway. 
1 Like
I feel like if you are being over protective it’s going to make her want to go against what you say and sneak around even more. She is 18… and in my opinion, if they want to have sex they’re going to whether he spends the night or not. However. My parents never allowed me to have a guy stay the night. I never asked either though. I already knew the answer I guess
I’d rather have my kids home. She’s an adult. Let him sleep over.
Does he live far away? I don’t understand why he needs to stay over?
4 Likes
I’m not at that stage yet with my son but I always assumed after 16/18 their partners would be sleeping over. I was sleeping out/left home at 16. (Had my first at 26)
1 Like
Thing is I wasn’t allowed to either so be protected, I just found somewhere else to have sex and got pregnant at 18 myself, it won’t stop it and I’d rather my kids be safe in my. House than find some random. Place
From someone who got pregnant at 17: let him stay over. Sit them BOTH down, and have a talk with them about protection etc, chances are, they’re already doing it. I didnt get pregnant when my boyfriend stayed over, i got pregnant when I pretended to have a sleep over with a girlfriend
The Answer is NO!!! She may be 18, BUT she is still IN YOUR HOME!!! You STILL RULE!!! What You may have done in YOUR younger years HAS NOTHING to do with YOUR RULES NOW in YOUR HOME!!! She either RESPECTS your Rules, Or OUT!!! No If’s , an’s Or but’s!!! Pronto!!!
My 18-year-old daughters boyfriend comes over and they hang out in their room and watch movies so I don’t know what the difference would be if he just stayed the whole night. It’s the concern is about them having sex they’re probably not even gonna do it here they’re already doing it somewhere else and hopefully safely since we had all the talks
She’s asking you. They don’t have to be sleeping in the same space. If you say no, as you said you had a baby at 18, she will stop communicating with you, and sneak to get what she wants.
Seperate beds/rooms. Would u want her to stay out somewhere or be under your roof. Have guidelines that both understand
Give her some condoms and make sure she has birth control. Calm down. Sex is a natural part of life
My 15yo daughter stays at her boyfriends house… her boyfriend also stays at our house!!
We all sat down and had a conversation about what is expected of them, set the ground rules and trust them to follow!! It’s been 6 months and we haven’t had a single problem!!
No one is getting smashed in our house except for me. So… NOPE
1 Like
Don’t give any advice …share your experiences with her…trust her…develop her ability to tackle problems…and eventually everything will fall into its place …
1 Like
She may be an “adult” age, but it’s still YOUR house…
1 Like
As a person who was allowed to stay overnight with their boyfriend at 14, dont do it… biggest regret of my “dating” life.
1 Like
Your house, your rules. And how 18? In or out of highschool? Out of high school maybe with an open door policy but you know your daughter. Have an expectation talk… Do you think she will respect it? What’s hard is if you say no they will probably sneak around and do it anyway.
I had a baby at 16. Your daughter is not you. You cannot plan her life according to your mistakes. If you did your job, she’s on a form of birth control and understands what you went through as a teen mom.
Was gonna say have them in separate rooms but it’s gonna end up both of them sneaking to each other’s rooms so no you should not let him stay over
It’s not as easy to afford a place if their own at 18 now as it used to be. Bit hypocritical assuming your daughter will make the mistakes YOU made as well.
1 Like
If she pays the bills and for the house she can other then that off buy her a teddy so she’s not lonely ha
1 Like
You are not the worst!!! I give my “adult” children a lot of freedoms, but that will never be one of them!!
1 Like
Also he should ask you as well. The request should not only come from her. Because that way if things go wrong he can claim no culpability. He has to put his word on the line.
1 Like
No!! As a parent I am responsible for teaching and modeling even if my child is 18. I strongly advise against this.Your home your rules.
1 Like
Unless you want to be a grandma than no.
2 Likes
Don’t control her! 18 in the UK is legally an adult! Just educate her on the importance of safe sex, and allow her to feel trusted! If she has given you no reason to NOT trust her, then don’t destroy those lines of open communication by treating her like you don’t trust her!
You can choose to not let him stay but that doesn’t mean they won’t find a way to have sex, it’s natural I’d just be open about it & why I’m not comfortable with it
1 Like
She is 18. Talk to her about birth control and even give her some condoms to have on hand.
That’s going to be a hard no. You can set boundaries in your home regardless of if she and he are sexually active already or not. Do not say yes because you are afraid of her reaction.
Not under my roof. When you get to that point, it is time to move out and get your own.
2 Likes
The amount of entitlement some of y’all parents have on your kid’s lives is baffling and nauseating 
Not to mention TOXIC.
1 Like
If you are not comfortable with it, no. If she doesn’t like it she is 18 therefore she is old enough to get her own place.
If she wants boyfriend to stay over - she needs to get her own place.
I dont know about other aspects of you life and house rules but no one could stay in my house and i wasnt really aloud at my boyfriends over night so in the end id lie and say i was at a fruends abd travel across the whole city to stay with him i think that was more dangerous than letting him stay and i wouldn’t have had sex with him for respect of my parents i just wanted to be close to him hope you can figure this one out good luck xx
No, tell them to get their own apartment and they can have sleepovers every night.
Your house your rules, if you don’t feel comfortable he should not stay.
If they are going to “do it” then they are going to “do it”. Make the rules in your home but don’t be naive. Just because you say “no” does not mean they won’t find a way.
Make the rules of your home based on your standard of your beliefs, not on her actions. If she is 18 or older, then she is of legal age of consent, you cannot choose for her. You cannot choose what she does outside your home but you can make the rules under your own roof only.
She’s going to do it wherever. At least she comfortable about not lying. Talk about safe sex and the struggles of being a young parent. Add in rent and responsibilities of an 18 yr old and her bf living together that it’s not just going to be a hang out.
Does she pay rent and bills? If not, the answer is absolutely not. If she does, then it’s her decision. As long as you are providing the home rent free then she doesn’t have a say.
Your house, your rules. If you don’t want him there then he doesn’t stay.
1 Like
I’m reading all these comments and it’s sad to see how much animosity we have towards girls. 
I moved out when I was 18 because I couldn’t have a boyfriend over let alone friends. I ended up in a bad relationship soon after and finally got out by the age of 26…I’m telling my age, but I’ll be 29 this year.
From my personal experience. I would put some boundaries down for sure. Treat her as a roommate at this point. Check her on finances and etc. Like has she paid any bills and such and if not get her to start paying bills. The reality is, when us girls become women we need guidance not doors slammed in our face because someone else is trying to control who is sleeping with us.
We gotta stop this narrative.
Just put it in your mind that they are already having sex. Get over it, make sure she is protected. Hell have her go with you to get on birth control and have an adult conversation with her about unprotected sex.
Then when you are ready to start living with your adult daughter as a roommate and not a little child is when you should make a decision.
In the end she will do what she wants to do. Don’t make her life harder and push her away by saying no.
1 Like
if you don’t want him sleeping over then say no; yes they are probably having sex but let them know they will not disrespect you or your house by using it as a hotel…they wanna play house??..let them go to HIS mother’s place and do it
Your house, your rules…
7 Likes
Bloody hel,my son is 35 yrs old!. Just sayin. Living at home still. He plays darts , drinking bourbon, and of course Gamer!! Lol.
1 Like
absolutely not. be different if she were married she should respect your boundaries
2 Likes
I first of all would make sure she is on birth control
As long as your rules are obeyed by.
She might be 18 and consider an adult BUT it’s your roof, you pay the bills.
1 Like
Your house your rules I wouldn’t be comfortable either
1 Like
I would let it be. Even give them protection. I would suffocate her with advice.
She’s 18 shes an adult, I wouldn’t have a problem with it.
Nope. Tell her if she wants to do adult things, it’s not gonna happen under your roof.
No. Its your house. She should respect it. Give an inch .Take a mile.
I don’t know your daughter’s personality but she is 18. She might still live with you but if you push against her too hard or don’t say what you feel in a right way for her to understand she might just walk out and be with him. With her being 18 you can’t really stop her anyway. However just because you didn’t use protection and prevent pregnancy, you have to remember she’s not you. She is an adult now and probably already active. Even if you say no because you’re worried she will get pregnant doesn’t mean you’re preventing it. She could get pregnant during the day outside of your house at any time that she leaves. You raised her as far as it can go. Now is the time to hope you raised her smart and right.
4 Likes
Honestly if you have talked with about being safe ,if not they will find another unsafe way. Just my opinion.
When she has her own place and is paying her own bills then she can make that decision.
I dated this one guy from 15 till I was a few months shy of 18. Everyone knew we were active after I turned 16. He was a preppy kid that was great in school and I was the wild child. His parents let me sleep over once or twice but I got his bed and they made him sleep on the couch. When he asked if I could sleep over and we share the bed they said no. He even swore that we wouldn’t do anything sexual that he just wanted to cuddle and wake up next to me. They still said no. So one day while hanging out he decided that it was worth the risk. He waited till after dark to go home. His curfew was 11 I think because that’s when his parents were getting ready for bed. So he decided to take me home with him anyway and let me out by the road so his parents wouldn’t see. I hid in the woods and after he parents went to bed he let me in through the window. We didn’t do anything that night except cuddle and wake up next to each other. Was really nice. The next morning I went out the window and walked down the road waiting on him to pick me up and take me home. So even if you say no and it’s something that she really wants she will find a way to do it. The people I was living with thought I was staying the night with a girl friend. I even called her so she would lie and say that’s where I was going. He was a very good guy. Never done anything bad or got in trouble. He just wanted to go to sleep with me in his arms and wake up next to me.
1 Like
Your gut instinct is telling you something.
2 Likes
Your house, your rules… i tell my kids when they are living on their own, paying bills, they can make their own rules, but at my house i make the rules