So my kids are 4 (twins), and they just seem to be getting worse and worse. Walk all over their dad and me, and we’ve tried everything for discipline, and they just seem to be getting worse. Anytime they’re told no, they give you a look that says “f you” and continue to do what they’re not supposed to while making eye contact. They know right from wrong, but they still continue to do this stuff. Help mamas, I am so exhausted and burnt out
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I have a four year old boy and you just described him! Nothing works, tried taking toys, cancelling days out, reward charts etc 
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Buy the book 123Magic. Hard at first, but works quickly
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You have to put your foot down and let them know who’s boss take one in thier room the.other in the corner no more.priveleges no is no if you’ve tried everything.go to your pediatrician have him refer.you to a child psychologist good luck
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How about a good spanking.
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They are testing you and know they are winning. Discipline them EVERY time, the same way! Talk back, discipline, tell me no, discipline, ignore me, discipline. They need to know their actions have consequences
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Wish I could help but my 18 month old tells me NO and STOP all day long 
Welcome to parenting!
They have personality. Maybe praise them while they’re doing what told. Ignore the looks. Lol. Too cute though. See if not making a deal changes the deal.
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Whoop their butts! Take away their toys for a solid week. Every single time they want to challenge you they get a swat, put in time out for 5 min, and whatever they like to play with gets taken away for three days. Don’t. Give. In. You have to 100% consistent with discipline. They walk on you because you allow them to! Acting like it’s cute is exactly the wrong thing to do. Its not cute it’s disrespectful and shouldn’t be tolerated.
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A good swat on the butt does wonders! Tell them no ONE time and then give them a swat on the seat. They don’t get to defy you.
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I’m raising a 4yo grandson and I ignore him to get his attention. Nobody likes to be ignored. I just walk away, lock myself in the bathroom. Tell him I am going to timeout and when he gets his mind right I will be out of timeout.
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Time to tap that ass.
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You have to put your foot down. YOU ARE THE PARENTS. Time outs! No treats, no outtings no tv. You let this go to far. Pop on the butt never hurt anyone. I said POP not BEAT
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Separate them when doing punishment.
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Consistency is key. Choose a form of discipline & be consistent with it. Don’t jump around with other methods. Don’t waver ever. Don’t discipline one moment and let it slide the next. Even on outings. Eventually (sometimes it takes a long time) they will realize there will be consequences every time.
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No people a spanking or seat is only gonna make it worse they will rebel worse so what u have to do is take things away put one in a corner and the other one I a different room in a corner let them sit there as long as it takes and as many times it takes for them to get it they will learn they are testing you two and you both have to be on the same page take away favorite toys take away anything u think will get them to listen to you non means no or when I tell u to do something you will listen and out them in time out for however long u think is appropriate I did it I started out with two min then that didn’t work so I would keep uping the time till they got the picture I never once spanked my kids I always used time out and it worked for me u have to be firm and stand with the punishments don’t give in they are gonna cry n fight you but be strong don’t give in they are testing how far they can go that’s why they stare at you they are waiting for u to do something and when u don’t they know they can get away with it u have to punish them right away so they know they are smarter then you think you have to out smart them 
good luck
My daughter is five an has attitude ,for days…you have to talk to them calming n tell them that’s not okay.take stuff away for a day ,if my daughter says something bad I usually tap her in the mouth she knows better after words lol you can’t laugh at them when they do stuff then they guna think it’s a joke and ok to them
Because parents treat their kids like an adult, unwilling to punish them. Damn those are the age they push your limits and see what they can get away with. And they can be as asshole as they can and u still gonna love them. If you are unwilling to whoop their ass, at leastPut your foot down, take away things they love most, separate them, put each on time out corner, let them cry their shit out and don’t acknowledge it
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I whoop ass. Lol kidding some kids really do need smacked around. Not saying do it but i can imagine your thoughts sometimes…
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If they don’t listen to you and blatantly disregard what you tell them to do/not to do then you aren’t disciplining them enough. Take away things. Put in time out. Whatever you do, BE CONSISTENT. Don’t forget the positives too. When they do something good or listen to you, praise them! Honestly it’s like training a puppy lol you have to be consistent and hold your ground. Don’t give in to tears or yelling, that only encourages bad behaviour. You aren’t a bad parent for disciplining your child, you are not their best friend you are their leader and you need to set boundaries for what will and will not be tolerated.
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I whoop my kids. I’ve been to the dr and I have a 7 and 3 yo. Their dr says it’s just their way of rebelling at their age. My 7yo has went to the extent of now misbehaving at school. Last week she cut her shirt then ripped the rest to the point I had to take her a new one. I’ve already filled out mental health papers. Her school has a pilot program for student who need mental health. They started it after one of their classmates was murdered about 3ish weeks ago
The important thing is as parents is to stick together and be consistent with the girls. You guys need to create an unbreakable team. If one parent doesn’t agree…do not disagree in front of the child wait to talk about it in private time. Take away privileges, they should not be rewarded for bad behavior no matter what! Do not give in when a tantrum flares up just to keep them quiet. Speak firm and kneel to their level so then can see you mean business. If they make a mess make sure they take responsibility to clean after themselves. If not let them know that not to expect special outings or treats. Make a calendar and let them know your discipline time will last X amount of days and stick to it…even if they did well…it is showing them you are the boss. After reward them that they completed their discipline time. Communication is important, let them know how things are going to change and discuss consequences. Create reward charts,disciplines charts and small chore charts they need to do. Create structure…do not give in to these testing times because when you turn around you will have twin teens ruling the house.
Communication,team work and consistency is the main key. Good luck!!
remind them after you love them and praise their efforts…never forget love heals…
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It’s time for a good old fashion whooping then seperate them and take away the things they like to do and make them take a nap… Make their whole day boring…they will either behave or end up taking a nap and you will get a break… It works for my 3 year old… She’s by herself but it works… Not often that i have to do that but it works.
Stay persistent, put them on time out all day! Like seriously, start talking about feelings… It will only get worse from here if you let it… Youre the parent, not them, talk to them as if yhey understand bc they need to start understanding NOW. I have 5yr old twin boys too. Some days are better than others but every day is a battle… I have time outs, no fun days, things like that… And still love me… Do quiet time…do you still do naps?? If not, do naps again, whatever it takes…
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Do not reward them after a bad behavior…of they throw a tantrum over it, EXPLAIN it to them WHY they are not getting a treat… Do you deserve it after a tantrum? No…
Parents set the guidelines and must be together on what the punishment is (taking items away, cancelling outings, play dates cancelled, chores added, no tv…whatever the method be consistent) When you both disagree on things they see an opening, close ranks. Add on for looks if you need to, they will get the message and stop testing the boundaries. No matter what…do not give in, sign of weakness. stay strong!
This is where that old grandma saying of a smack on the behind is just putting the brains back where they belong. As a mom of twins I can so relate… Lol it only gets worse. Wait till they are teens. Boy and girl now almost 12 going on 18… My last babies in the house. Singles are all moved out. But these two run me ragged more than the other 3 ever did. 
I know spanking is viewed as abusive these days but…tapping those little legs or popping that hand may be enough of a negative consequence to change their behavior.
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do you talk to them during these times while they are together or separately?
Try 123 magic. I’ve seen some success with my son, and I love that it cut down on fighting, yelling etc.
I’ll give you my mom’s number. Give her one week and I’ll pay You if They dare to disrespect someone else. Btw, my mom doesn’t spank.
Not saying beat them… but yeah maybe a spanking -as in one firm swat- to that behind will snap them right to.
Kids these days are so different… I know if I’d given my mom that f you look, I’d be in bed by 5 for a month.
Wishing you the best of luck
It doesn’t get any better I have twin eight-year-old girls and their little shits
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Maybe you as parents you need counseling to help you act like parents. Children need discipline not woosy parents. My parents took things away from me. We did that with our kids. TV gone, phone gone,DVD gone for a week and see how things went.
Put them in individual corners kneeling on rice
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They are 4…this is normal. Just keep being consistant. But this is Why parents yell…kids are assholes.
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Take everything they love , away from them , and let them earn it back one by one with appropriate behavior .
Put one child in a room and the other in a chair in the corner. No TV no sweet snacks. No cereal as snacks until they can behave. They don’t need fruit snacks, cereal bars, granola, or cartoons. It’s hard you can also take toys. You will be tempted to give in for the peace and quiet but that will only reinforce the idea they are in charge. Good luck
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Spank alot. Works every time. My 4 boys are growing up just fine with that punishment and so did I.
my 21m old is the same way
Start taking stuff away. Favorite toy, favorite foods and give incentives for good behavior. And practice your Mom look. The look that says don’t you dare.
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Little smack on the butt never hurt anyone. If they are like this in school I would see a behaviour specialist
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I was spanked as a kid, not often (because it worked!) and not super hard (I do not feel like I was beat or abused in anyway shape or form). So while I do not have kids and therefore cannot put much of an opinion and this, I feel like spanking is ok, but do you and dad Give strong positive reinforcement when they do good behaviors? I think a healthy balance of limit setting/discipline, positive reinforcement And if needed a child behavioral specialist would be helpful
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Immediate consequences and consistency.
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Consistency…when Mom and Dad don’t back down…
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I’m old school. A good spanking then sending them to their room is what I’d do.
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How about time outs on the floor where nothing distracting is around. Stay there and if they get up sit them right back down. I know, this is exhausting and I’m sure you “don’t have time” but it works if you are consistent and stick to it. Same thing if they won’t go to bed. Parenting toddlers is super hard but you HAVE to discipline!
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Sounds pretty overwhelming for you and your husband.
Here are a few ideas that may work.
Choose one behaviour that is the hardest or upsetting to deal with. And choose a consequence that will happen if that behaviour continues.then sit them down and explain that the behaviour will no longer be accepted and if it continues explain the consequences. Get them to repeat it back to you. When the behaviour happens (and it will all a lot in the beginning as they test the rules)ask them to tell you what the rule is and the consequences are then follow through .pick a consequence that you can apply even if you are out somewhere.
Then when you feel that the behaviour has improved .pick the next annoying behaviour and repeat the process,after a couple of times they will realize that you are serious and it should be easier to get them to work with you. Remember it takes approximately 21 days to reprogram the brain .
Are they overwhelmed by the amount of toys etc that they have access to. I made up smaller containers of all the toys and put them away and every week I would put the toys that were out away and give them a different container of toys. Made my life easier because there wasn’t so much to clean up and made it easier for the kids to keep their space clear and they played with what was out instead of just dumping it everywhere.
Remember you are doing a great job (you haven’t locked them in the basement yet(lol) and the time you spend now getting the situation under control is time you won’t spend in court with them when they are teenagers.
Keep up the good work,
Change one thing at a time,
Offer stories or crafts for times they are having good day (a great reward system)
Use time outs lock yourself in the bathroom when you need a break. Time outs are for moms not kids haha
They need a few lashing! WTH? Stop babying them. They are going to more than embarrass both of you in time to come. Do they work and pay bills? No! Put your damn feet down and get serious. Send them to me for a weekend. I’m in the Virgin Islands. Caribbean upbringing is a bit different than expected. One look and they will start to straighten up!
the paddle should be used on older children,
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Smack on the butt, consistently time out
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Depending on what they are doing…a good flick on the ear works great…I didnt need to spank my kids until they got alot older…but they know you wont do anything and that’s why…my kids ran in fear when I would do the flick thing with my finger as a warning😂
Iv got twin girls now 9 & I for one understand this their 9 & still do the same theyve trashed my home furniture u name it theyve destroyed it I’m just getting them tested for adhd cause I’m almost done but twins are hard work
Twins will ware u out and it does not get better. My twins are now 28 years old and my first grandchild is 1 month old my kids did not run over me. I did not allow it their father was not around to help and didnt help when he was there. I never hit them. But i didnt have to. If i had to get tough to get them to understand. That is exactly what I do. Ask your self who is in control. If they are u are not being tough enough with them. I refused to be ran over by a child
4 SMACKS WITH A WOODEN SPOON…
It would take you about 4 days and repeated sessions but you would see much happier kids by the end of the week.
For all of you “non physical” people who want to throw your useless stats at me, SAVE IT!
I’m a successful parent of talented adult children who KNEW what would happen when they broke the rules.
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Aren’t you supposed to give them the eye contact ?not the other way round!? Hmmmm 
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U need to spank their lil bottoms just when they do that. Spare the rod spoil the child
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DaLana Harrison DeVonne Harrison…isn’t this normal?
Make a plan
, both be on the same page with the plan
Be consistent
Remove privileges
Time out
Spend time outside every day
Wear them out
Read to them
Seek specialist advice
Smack that ass… but also diet is important. I have an odd (obientiant defiant disorder) kid and diet and vitamins are important
I had twins in 1987 and i already had a 22 month at home. Did it by myself. Stop being an idiot. Train them to behave or else.being able to behave is as important as being able to wipe ur ass on ur own. they totally understand and if u dont u are making their lives harder by not giving them the tools they’ll need to function easily in society. It is your fault sorry not sorry.get a pair n get control. Dont be suckers. Your kuds will thank u. My twins are 32 yrs old now.
I have identical twin boys who are now 10 I went thru the same thing… it will get better just remember they feed off of eachother so when one is in a bad mood guess what the other is going to eventually be the same way its just twins…so ones acting up lets make that two… I know it makes it so much harder when they know right from wrong… but just keep with the discipline…time outs…separate them for a little bit at a time… they say for twins the terrible 2’s last til they are just about 5 … from experience I can say it did with tantrums, fighting between them, or just out right stubbornness from them, toys got taken, cartoons were no more, just see what works for you to change the behavior and show them you mean it . Hope it help 
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A smack for very serious stuff is ok but no for general acting out…are they getting enough outside time to tire them out?Is there any pattern ie worse before bedtime or when you and hubby are together( my kids do this standard attention seeking)Once they go to school it’ll get better.Everyone says that but as a mum of 6 it’s Definitely the truth x
I’d be srtipeing me some ass…
I used an award chart and time outs. I’m old school but only spanked my kids a few times for serious reasons (running into parking lots without looking, shoplifting, etc)
Is spanking their done the correct way they are very effective what you have to take away something that they really do enjoy whether it would be a be outside or certain toy. Consistency is a big thing
Take away their favorite toys and they learned that behavior somewhere and obviously gotten away with it also.
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Spank that ass. Actions have consequences they will get it quickly.
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I’d spank and use the timeout corner.
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Separate them right off and put them each in a room for timeout. They should not come out for at least 8 min. If they dare to come out then they’ve extended their time alone. Take away things they treasure doing as punishment for a period of time. It seems they have no fear of punishment so whatever you’ve tried in the past is ineffective. Change it up. They are “feeding” off of each other and feeling very supported. Pay now or pay later. Most of all, STICK TO WHAT YOU say and stop repeating yourself. They must listen the first time or you move to physically move them. Repeat repeat repeat until the disrespectful stare stops.
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Set a contract before them that outlines Responsibilities and Privileges. Stop being a cream puff. You’re the adult so act like one.
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Strip there rooms no toys or devices
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Spank that butt. When they started walking they became old enough. Let them know your not joking by consistency. They will stop
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If you don’t like it now, wait till they’re 14! You better get a grip on them now!
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If you can’t control them when they’re 6, you won’t control them when they are 16.
As they get closer to 6, and start school, it will be impossible to reverse this. They are 4, so you have 2 years to turn it around.
The biggest reasons I see in society today for unruly kids are,
- Parents try to be friends instead of parents. Parents want their kids to “like them” so badly they don’t make sure the kids respect them. Parental RESPECT is what you want, not friendship.
- Parents are not consistent with rules and discipline. Don’t make rules for a 3 year old that you would make for a 9 year old. Don’t expect a younger child to be able to do what an older child can do. Be realistic in your expectations. Also, if you set a rule or expectation and the child fails to obey it, consider is it because they aren’t old enough to do it in which case you need to adjust the rule, or is it defiance and willfulness in which case you need to MAKE them obey. Don’t make excuses for your kids behavior because you can’t stand the idea they might “hate” you. The hate won’t last, they will actually be thankful when they grow up that you were in charge. But if you don’t establish the idea of, “Love me or hate me but you WILL respect me” and do it now, they will NEVER respect you even when they are grown up.
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Whoop that ass…plain and simple.
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Discapline…pick them up tap their little bottom and remove them from the situation or what it is that they’re doing … looking at u is nothing do u want cussing 6 year old…u hold the power remind them & urself & husband … good luck
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They must have boundaries of which they do not cross. You must teach them this. I worked for schools 20 years and they bring that bad behavior to school. Educators are not baby sitters. They will lose out on it if you don’t show discipline.
Just remember you are the parent. And you have all the power.
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I take everything away from mine, I let them do things that I could do as a child. That seems to do the trick for me at least.
They are 4,reign it in before they turn teenagers & more feral
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Many give advice…how many have twins?? Twins are different than raising a single child…one twin has a stonger will than the other one…been there…my twins are 26 now…
Consistency is key!! If they see you’re getting worn down they know they are winning… Also pick your battles… they are wanting attention… if it’s not something big then ignore them… they are wanting a reaction out of y’all…
Tell dad grow some man balls and use the belt
Spank them for Christ’s sake… Soap in the mouth… #Isurvived
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Stand in corner… really works…doesnt take long
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Well it would be a cold day and you know where when I let my four year olds big like that 1 and 1/4 and 1 and 1/4 in another room and spank their but wouldn’t hurt didn’t hurt my kids they grew up fine and I had a plastic spatula that I used on them I’m not proud of it but they turned out good
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There’s a reason it’s called the “f*ck you 4s”
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Get off your butt and discipline them…
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Look up the book (they have a dvd too) 123 magic. I was a nanny for 13 yrs and do home daycare now and this is my go to book. Good luck mama. Usually it takes about 7 days to see results and a lot of times it gets worst before it gets better because of them testing this new boundary and making sure mom and dad will stick with it.
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Take things off of them they will have nothing to play with.
So beat their was a few good times and see what happens 
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Where did they learn such vile attitude? Children are a product of their environment .
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You are the cause and the solution. Simple
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They are only 4 and you say you’ve done everything in the way of discipline? You have to be consistent in how you discipline for it to truly work and they are not nearly old enough for you to have tried everything consistently/long enough to see actual progress. You need to choose a form and stick with it.
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Please dont hit or hurt them.try talking to them and explaing that they are big kids now and you know they can behave.My son would scream every night until 4 am.I thought i was going to lose it.then one day he just stopped on his own.
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🤦🤦🤦 Stop. Enough with these posts already. I’m hoping you have paid creative writing experts!! 
The world of parenting, or lack of, couldn’t possibly be this disappointing. Can it be? 
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Get behavioral counseling.
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I mean, they’re 4. What did you expect, ain’t called the terroristic 4s for nothing.
What works best for my daughter is taking toys away and making her sit until her little ass decides to stop what she was doing.
They’re 4. They’re gonna test you. I doubt you’ve tried “everything”.
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