I would create a system where every 30 minutes you have her go potty. It might seem wild, every 30 minutes. But the consistency will get her mind wired to use the restroom regardless if she’s playing hard. I’d treat it like potty training a toddler. Be patient and understanding, but firm and consistent. I don’t see a need to punish her or make her feel like a bad little human. Understand her, and create a system that works to enable changed behavior during times where she needs to poop. Redirecting her mind subconsciously is the best way to go about it. That will start with timed potty breaks. And if she feels she’s doing it alone, everyone playing should join in to make it fun.
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Encourage her to raise her hand to ask to use the bathroom, perhaps she is embarrassed or shy. Is this only during school?
I would call your pediatrician make sure there is not an underlining problem. Discipline is not the right path.
Google this as well.
Find what she values and take it away… she clearly values playing with siblings/friends, if you take that away as a consequence for not doing the proper thing, it will get her attention…
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My 6 year old daughter was having some urinary issues a few months back and we had a UTI ruled out multiple times. Turns out, her bowls were impacted and she had so much stool in her system that it was pressing on her bladder and making her either have to go a ton or peeing her bed or pants constantly. Her pediatrician suggested a stool softener and after a few gnarly bathroom breaks she was finally all good to go.
I lost my temper a few times and was under the assumption she didn’t want to get up and go because she had done that in the past. BUT because I reacted that way before she tried to hide it from me. It wasn’t her fault. I would just make sure to get her checked out and most likely there’s something internal going on that can be easily fixed. Fingers crossed!
My son did this exact thing. At the same age too! I made him clean it up himself with no help. I also threatened to send him to school in his little brothers diapers so he wasn’t ruining underwear anymore. It worked 
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Make her sit on the toilet to try and poop after dinner every night. Being consistent will help her body know when it should go. The accidents she should be responsible for cleaning herself. And if non of that works switch back to pull ups. Maybe embarrassment will make her stop.
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This is VERY common at this age. My son did this. Took him to the pediatrician and he said not to stress. Make her take potty breaks at scheduled times. Sometimes they are busy and think they can hold it but can’t or they wait too long. It could also be a control issue. With so much stress and chaos going on, bodily functions become one thing they are capable of controlling so they attempt to exhibit control over their lives with this. Try giving her control over something else like the outfit she wears or something similar. Ped also said that you can poop 30 minutesafter eating or smelling food so try retraining her to go after a meal. We ended up doing a scheduled poop time and it worked well. He gets to take his tablet or a book and sit quietly and uninterrupted and go. Good luck and just know this won’t last forever.
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I have a grandson same age. Does the same thing, same reason. He has to clean his own pants, and all electronics are taken. He gets to watch his brother play as he is punished. He gets nothing until he has a good day. Then he gets one at a time. Some times if he wants to come see gramma, it will be only if he is good. I talked to him about it and he learned a new word. Respect. So now if I talk to him I will ask him if he had respect for him and others today.
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No playing till she stops. My son is 7 and was still pooping his underpants. I started giving him miralax every day and he pretty much stopped going in underpants. He was constipated n it hurt coming out so he’d just go little bits in underpants. C
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My 3,5yo son has the same issue 
he was independent, but 3 months ago he had a hard time to poop and it was really hard - i still remember when he was cried outloud at night and my husband didn’t notice there was a very big and hard poop hanging there, until my feelings told me to check it, and yup it was veeeery big stuck and it won’t get out of there. We told him to pushed but it’s to painful i think (i can imagine), since then he never want to go to toilet anymore even if it’s urgent. now we are back from potty training again for poop (but still didn’t work yet) 
My youngest was the same only accidents with poo fine with wee we had tryed everything and then one day she got up and went to toilet and haven’t turned back she was doing it right up to she was 8 tryed everything that we could think of but in the end it’s up to them when they are ready
My son went thru a phase like this around the same age. I’d have him go to the bathroom with me and put the poop in the toilet and flush. He would “help” with the clean up of the underwear but if it was really bad, I’d throw it away. We talked about why he thought this was happening since he’d been potty trained for years before this started. I told him if he’s unable to poop in the toilet, no problem… I’ll buy him the pull up diapers and not to worry, they come in his size. He quickly expressed his displeasure in the idea of wearing a diaper. I just said that’s no problem either, no need for a diaper if the poop goes in the toilet. He stopped on his own after that.
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Make her clean your own underwear and scrub or wash everything she sat on with poopy pants. They control own bowels. Say" sorry you chose to poop own pants" thats your choice. But your consequence is to clean up after yourself. We as a family don’t like to smell it. Might have to write a behavior contract. With the statement of if pants are poopy then you clean. If you poop in toilet then you get ________. Both parent and kid sign contract. Make it a month long.
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Maybe she’s constipated. If it hurts coming out they’ll refuse to go out of fear. We bought a fiber liquid for ours. Settled down after a few weeks.
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I think it’s emotional… is really sad how many parents just want to punish their kids! Smh
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My daughter was actually constipated and had this problem and would hold it because it would hurt her rectum then would hold it. She still takes miralax to this day. Take her to the dr she may have to be on a special diet too.
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My son had that issue & almost needed surgery on his intestines, we opted for a laxative for 12 months & that cured it. Epsom salt baths can really help the movement move too. It’s not intentional, so don’t be upset with her, she doesn’t even know why it’s happening.
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It shall pass
She’s 7
She’s just a bizzy kid
Life is too short to get mad at the little things kid’s will go threw
Just love her and kiss her let her know she’s loved
Keep her clean and send her back off to play
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Say she can’t play with siblings until she goes to poop like a big girl. Sucks but what else can you do?
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I would make her do timed bathroom breaks. It’s great that she loves playing with her siblings, but explain to her how gross poop is, and make her clean it up.
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Make sure its nothing medical!
My neice had this issue until she was 8. She had to get a GI tube put in because of it.
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I think in the time of isolation with COVID-19 a lot of kids are having behavior issues. I’m not sure it’s something to punish. Ive been working on helping them succeed vs punishment.
My 6 1/2 year old went through a few weeks of wetting her bed again. I resisted shaming her for it and simply had her help me pull the sheets, wash and put back on. She also started wiping poop on the wall by the toilet and refused to flush. We cleaned that together too and then had talks about why. She stopped the poop wiping but still won’t flush. Work in progress.
Talk to her. Help her succeed.
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Mine did this at school. I finally talked to the teacher and made mandatory potty breaks every 45 minutes. After she figured out she was spending more time in the bathroom and less time with friends playing, it was magically cured.
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Make specific times she needs to go.sit on the potty and try. Same as potty training. Just go back to the basics and kind of start from scratch
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My son has done it a few times. BUT I will say his is on accident. He gets busy playing and holds it until it’s too late. Or he thinks he needs to pass gas and it ends up not being a fart. Hes not done it in a few months though. My advice is talk through it, dont punish, and just be patient. Some kids do better talking through it and being explained why they can’t do this. Instruct that its important to go sit on the potty when they feel like they need to go And it’s best not to hold it. Were honest with our 6 year old and told him what could happen If he holds his poop. They are smarter than we give them credit.
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Talk to her Pediatrician about Encopresis is a common condition. If that’s not it then take forced breaks.
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I would try going back to the potty training rewards she was getting also she might be doing it because shes scared or nervous or anxiety issues going on that’s causing it. That’s what we had to do with my 6 year old who is also in 1st grade. We talked to her asked if she wanted to be like animals and go potty outside cuz that’s where she’ll have to go if she keeps doing it in her panties between that and rewards she started going back to the toilet instead of her panties.
Many adults are in therapy because of potty training. Take her to the doctor first. Pooping in her pants may be something she feels she can control, in her life.
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I had that with my son for a little while recently (5.5). Tried talking, shouting etc but what worked was a little reward chart which we completed each day for no accident and also trying a new food. He chose bubblegum as his first gift (20 count) and by the time we finished the second one, it no longer was an issue.
My daughter did the same. I tried everything. I noticed that it was an attention seeking problem. Made her fetch and change her own underware and pants a few times. Hasn’t happened since.
My son use to do that drove me and his dad up the wall. So we had him clean out his own underwear and made him sit on the potty every 15-30min. Than slowly started reminding him every hour. Took about a week and a half before he got the picture.
A child should never be punished for accidents, I do not care their age! Encourage drinking water, give probiotics, and if you have to go sit with them! Many times as someone mentioned, they have had painful bowel movements! I doubt any child deliberately has accidents!
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My daughter was doing this for a while when she younger about that age and it was because she didnt wanna miss out anything. So I explained how she is actually missing out on more by not using the bathroom as it takes more time to clean up and have a shower ect. I started alarms for every hour and taking her to the bathroom . It worked for her. But every child is different.
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Try putting her on the potty every half an hour and see if she goes
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Make her go potty. You should know about when she would have to go. I used to do that with my son. Hes only 5 now but hated to have to stop playing to go to the bathroom i was just lets go. Im done changing clothes and cleaning poop out of underwear. I even told him we’d do back to diapers which he didn’t want to do.
I think its the age. My son was doing the same thing. Definitely talk to your pediatrician about it first. Then take away all electronics /toys /t.v time…every time she does goes without messing in her panties she eats and hour of play time. I know it sounds harsh,but it works.
So this happened with my son but he is younger. We ended up bribing him with small surprises whenever he would go. After a week he got the point as we made a big deal of how happy we were of him. Now no prizes needed
Has anyone thought to get a medical treatment? My daughter did thus, and turned out she had celiac, and had this struggle ongoing for almost 6 years in pull ups. She is now going on month 4 of accident/ pull up free
My son did this. You know what got through to him? I took away all of his beloved character underwear and bought him plain white undies. Told him once he starts pooping in the toilet he could wear his character undies again. It worked and he was back in his favorite underwear within 3 weeks.
What you need to do is sit her on the toilet with an iPad and let her play for an hour at the most regular time she goes. What has happened is that she’s got so used to holding it in that she has got used to the sensation of when she needs to go. Once she gets used to going and has empty bowels she will start sensing when she needs to go again Do this 1 hour after a big meal. If you can get her to start going this way you ll crack it x
My son was doing the same thing we found out he was holding it in because he would have to go while at school and no doors on the bathroom stales so he got compacted which caused problems but dr got him on mirlax and a schedule of going at home all is good
Make her start washing them by hand with glows and supervision and maybe she will learn that she needs to stop playing and go poop. If she’s saying she’s not wanting to stop playing… when are you finding out she did this? She has to stop anyways to get changed… she’s 7 so she should understand that if you tell her. Look… you have to stop to get cleaned up anyways… let’s go potty instead.
My daughter did this. We let her go pick out any underwear she wanted from the store and told her if she pooped in them, they go in the trash. We threw out about 3 pairs before she realized we weren’t playing and she was losing all her favorite underwear. Then she started using the potty all the time cause she didn’t want to lose anymore of her favorites.
That happened to my daughter when she was younger I would get so mad because we could me home at a park in the car anywhere she would pee on herself I even spanked her a few times until I left her and would so ok let’s just go change and take a shower and one day she just stoped peeing on herself I never new why she did it ,I took her to the clinic to get checked and everything (you guys know what I mean ) but I guess it was just a faze of all me my kids (5) she the only one that’s done this so just ask her if everything is ok and be patient it’s hard be try
Mandated potty breaks. My son did this in kindergarten he didn’t want to pee during free time so he would pee himself before he got home.
Put her back in diapers or pull-ups that will fit and I’m sure she won’t like that and will stop. Or as horrible as it sounds make her stay in the poopy pants for a few mins I’m sure she’ll change her tune. At 7 years old she should understand not to poop in her pants. So maybe she just needs to see how it feels to sit in it
My Daughter did the same thing. Just like yours, she didn’t want to go pee because she didn’t want to stop playing long enough to. But I was lucky, I could always tell when she needed to go. She couldn’t sit still/(the pee pee dance.) So I would make her stop what she’s doing and go.i dont know how often your child go to the bathroom but set a time to go if its every 2 hours or 3. Or maybe there’s a way you can tell.I dont think there’s a problem. They get in that play mood and just dont want to stop. Its normal
I did all those punishments…then took my son to the Doctor…talk about feeling like a heel ! Turns out he had a impacted bowl…we know we feel the urge to “poop” if the hardware is messed up…Dr. told me impacted you don’t feel that urge until it’s to late…I felt horrible…couple meds to get things working never happened again
“she specifically told us that she doesn’t want to stop playing with siblings to go poop.” Therein the problem awaits. As her mother, sternly but gently , deal with this ‘problem’ as it comes. She is making a choice , telling you her mother, this is the way she wants this at this time . She is 7. Good time to begin to show her there are consequences for your choices in life, good and bad. Should she be told she will! take her soiled linens, dispose of the poop and rinse linens in the toilet, (I know this is way out of some comfort zones) and bring her linens to you, The time this will take ‘away from her siblings’ will be far more than what time it would have taken her to poop, wipe clean and WASH HER HANDS. Her way only makes more work for you, Mom.
My daughter had that issue it ended up she was constipated and we had to do merlax and it stopped
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Put her on the toilet every hour. My son did this and I told him that if he is going act like a toddler, I’m going to treat him like one.
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You should be seeing a doctor and asking a doctor first before you try things yourself. You dont know if there is an underlying medical condition and you dont want to end up feeling bad for punishing a child who couldn’t help it.
Geez all these people coddling…if she is in fact choosing to crop in her pants and its not a medical issue… then make her clean herself up and make hand wash those dirty drawers then bust her butt…she’s 7 you don’t need to be cleaning her at all … a few times of having to hand wash them nasty crap filled panties and a good butt whopping to follow and she’ll stop
I’ve gone through that as well. I started setting a time to go potty. If it’s around the same time I have them go sit on the toilet and go to the bathroom.
Make her wash herself and clean her own undies out in the sink. Eventually she’ll get tired of it. Also it seems harsh but tell her she has one pair of undies for the day and if she poops in them, then she’s SOL.
Make her clean her underwear. And take things aways from her. She’s not doing that on accident she’s doing it on purpose. If she pees in the potty then she understands that she has to poop as well in the potty. Am not trying to sound like a mean person. Put her in time out. If she loves anything take those things that she loves and put them away.
My stepson did this inbetween 6&7 told us the exact same thing he didnt want to stop playing to go to the bathroom.
we ended making him stay in the bathroom on the toilet.
For reading, snacking, even coloring books when he was bored he missed out on playtime and unless he was sleeping, naptime, we were leaving and when someone needed that bathroom (thank goodness I had 2 at the time).
He missed out on alot of playtime and didn’t like it he stopped after 9 days.
Consequences. If she is doing it because she doesn’t want to stop playing, make it so if she does it, she wont be able to play.
My family fucking traumatized me when I had accidents and I’m 23 now and it still bothers me I got two kids and I would never instill fear for a child to take a shit in a toilet
Try n making her wash out her own panties.that might work .I tried that on my stepson but he just didn’t care.but my stepdaughter hated it especially when it was her period time she would never be prepared like I taught her to be .so it worked on one but not the other one .
I’d be asking myself if she was trying to tell me something. That’s not at all normal. Is it possible there is something happening to her?
My cousin did this parents told her she couldn’t play till she pooped or either when she didn’t stop playing to poop didn’t get to play the rest of day in about a week she was going to potty
Or get her the pull ups,for potty training, she may get embarrassed, and if she don’t they are responsible.
My noyfriends u yr old son still dles this… Same reasons. He is made it clean it himself when here with his dad. About a month ago… He hid behind couch… I knew he shit … Thays what my toddlers did. Sure enough… He had. I went in bathroom to get the dirty inderware to throw in wash… He tried to shove a whole turd down the sink. Clogged it up. When be ks made to sit to poop… It is huge!!! Like scare you … Half his body huge. Set a timer. Tjays what i said… Or like every hour or two maks them sit for awhile.
Is it the same time everyday? Can you make her sit on the toilet with some sort of schedule?
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My 6 year old havs started doing it and I don’t no why she have been out of nappies day and night since 1 year old never had any accidents never went back wards there been a lot of kids doing it lately I think its all down to change where they besn off school and everything is different
Some will have accidents into their early teens and there is nothing you can do except teach them and help them to clean it all up in the morning.
My son is 7… he was doing the same thing but with pee… he said it was because he didn’t know… i found out that it was because he didn’t want to stop whatever he was doing to go… its an actual thing. Like they feel like they are going to miss out on something so they don’t want to stop and go to the bathroom. I had a simple talk with my son and he stopped right away on his own… i used our dog as an example. *our dog peed in the house and it stunk like dog pee… and he was upset and told the dog you stink like pee! Thats gross get away from me! And I said son… you pee on yourself too… dont you think your pee stinks too?? And after that he stopped lol… i guess its different for each child.
Seven years old it’s not a accident. Get her a bucket and soap pair of gloves and make her clean them ,she will think twice next time
Make her go sit on the toilet every 45 mins to an hour set a timer for 5 to 10 minutes maybe do 7 min to match her age. If you do this for a few days she should correct the issue to avoid having to go sit so often.
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Yelling at her is really not going to help. It is part of the process. She needs to remember before it is too late. Help her, don’t punish her.
Don’t let her use panties at all when feels poop coming out she needs to either go to the bathroom and use the toilet or clean up her own poop she will change her mind really fast
You’re her mother first not her friend. There needs to be consequences for her actions. I highly doubt it’s a medical problem if she has stated that she doesn’t want to stop playing. You can still discipline and not be an ahole.
Please make sure you get her checked out to make sure there is no underlying medical conditions. I understand it can be frustrating and expensive throwing away underwear but you never know.
Sounds like there is something else going on. have u had the talk with her about anyone messing with her. Usually kids who do this beyond toddler age there is other issues going on
Im no specialist but i think its nerves because iv heard first hand from adults and teenagers i havnt experience it my self but b4 a test, presentation or a show they would need to go to the bathroom for a shit first because soon as they get up there they would need to go to the toilet but see for a child maybe not knowing. just my thought
Bathroom breaks and sticker charts, maybe talk to her doctor about it but don’t shame and humiliate her about it like some suggested. That’s just uncalled for.
I honestly think this is normal in some kids. My youngest has the same problem. He is now 4 years old and often still poops in his undies. So, what I have done is give him INSTANT gratification whenever he poops on the potty. I will say things like “Good job buddy!! You’re such a big boy!!” And he will instantly become super excited and say he wants to be a big boy all the time, which has helped wonders. Whenever he does have accidents, I try not to yell because it doesnt help, at all. Instead I will be like “Oh no bud, what happened? Remember, big boys poop on the potty!” And he will shrug his shoulders and say “Yeah, I’m not a big boy today.” But the constant reminder of “big boys poop on the potty” has helped drastically. So, in your case, I would say something like “Well sweetie, you have to poop on the potty because if you dont, people will see the stains and we dont want that, do we?” Something that makes her think about what she is actually doing versus feeling like she is messing up.
My 7 year old was doing this!!! She has stopped now but i never could figure out why
Do you give a little treat if she goes on the potty! Hershey kiss or such! My kids even liked a sticker! Don’t scolded or she will start holding and that causes another set of problems! I can’t believe how cruel some of these replies are! Try to be patient!
I have a 4 year old boy that was doing it. Started making him wash them out before putting in laundry. Problem solved
Make her a sticker chart for every day she doesnt poop. Try it as a game.
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I would show her how to clean them herself! Every time so she won’t expect me to do it when she can use the toilet
Have her clean them, like in the washtub before being laundered, and herself on her own. I’d also worry something else is happening she isn’t talking about.
Possibly there’s something physically wrong. I would have it checked out by a doctor. And I might even get a second opinion
There is a child watch you can order called the Potty Watch and you set the alarm to tell you when to go.
The first time I made my daughter clean her own poopy undies was the last time she did it.
So I had to sit in the bathroom with my daughter then I had other stuff to do so I got a potty chair and carried that chair with me in everyroom my daughter and I was in…it worked
We had pee probs with SS around 5 or 6 and we made him wear Pull Ups. He was embarrassed so he started going to the bathroom.
Make her wash out her own undies in the toilet and clean herself up!! Be the last time !!
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My daughter had this problem and it was not her fault. Make sure it is not a medical condition before punishing. We had to give her meds to soften her stool for about 6-8 months. We had to retrain her body to know when to go poop. It all worked out, after the cycle of meds she hasn’t had the problem again. She could be impacted and you don’t even know it.
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It happens. My son did it. You just have to go in make them stop and go potty
You pop your pants you clean it up, you then can sit on the time out chair and watch the other kids play.
Start making her go to the bathroom every hour. If she has an “accident” time outs.
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So you’re yelling at a kid to use the bathroom nice yes put fear her to shit in her pants. Maybe just get her a pull up and chill TF out and just practice makes perfect
She might feel overwhelmed. It’s different than reg school.
Why do y’all start with punishment? Maybe its physical or emotional. Start with a doctor visit. Shame and/or punishment can scar for a lifetime!
My mom would have used the embarrassment card buy either making us wear pull ups or a diaper.
Any stressful situations going on at home? Sometimes that can be why
Could be her nurves, could be something she eat, could be a 24 hour bug. If it keeps up, take her to Pedestrian.