Hi, I am quite confused right now as this happened just yesterday: I am 8 weeks pregnant with my second child with my boyfriend. Last night, my boyfriend and my brothers in law got together for drinks at home. Then I decided to go out for food after the drinks. All went well after, and so my boyfriend slept when they arrived back home. I could not sleep because of nausea every midnight. Just when I was about to sleep, my boyfriend’s phone rang once. My gut feeling told me to get his phone and check. On the phone was a caller named Janet and the name of a well-known strip club. I immediately called back the number and put it on record. She answered and asked if he was still coming over. I didn’t speak, and she dropped the call. I saved the voice record, took photos of his call log under her name. The saved number was recent, but he still called her a couple of times prior to that midnight. I woke him up to confront him, and he said he did nothing wrong, he was supposed to take my brothers in law since one of them requested to go, and he got her contact details a few nights ago since she called the police precinct for police assistance (boyfriend is a police officer). He claimed and voiced his feelings that he has never cheated on me, will never do so, and that they weren’t able to go to the club since they were caught on heavy traffic. I feel betrayed, and I couldn’t even tell my sisters about it. What should I do? Should I forgive and forget this? Am I overreacting? I have been too emotional after, and now, I am ordered by the doctor to go on bed rest due to threatened abortion. What should I do? I really am confused and desperate for guidance.
He’s cheating with a stripper & you need to get tested for diseases.
Girl go with your gut. There’s NO reason for him to have a strippers name programmed in his phone.
He’s full of shit! Strippers don’t call like that unless they know the person.
Not overreacting. He had her programmed in his phone… he’s lying 100%.
My concern is…2nd child with him…why hasn’t he stepped up to marry you and do right by you and his children? If he’s cheating…drop him…how disrespectful to do that durimg a pregnancy, have your doctor check you for std’s asap. The last thing you need is to pass somethimg along to your baby. If he can cheat while you are pregnant, he has no respect for you and never will. Respect yourself by walking away. If his story happens to be true…ok, fine, but, my concern is still that he is your “boyfriend” not your husband. Time for the guy to stop playimg house and step up and be a man now…his children are watching.
Cops love strippers unfortunately. Has he been spending alot of cash? If so it went straight to Janet
No way. Dont do any of that!
once you start calling other people digging to verify your gut feeling… its time to go. He is shady.
Hes lying, you knw this…
Even if there was a police report done, that misuse of information. Go with your gut.
Trust your gut. Not advice from social media.
Go to the source pay janet a polite visit
If you have a feeling in your gut it’s generally correct.
Your gut is usually right save yourself the hurt.
Hes cheating. My first fiance and I never got married, we are good friends and hes an officer. He stated all officers have a side piece so that they dont have to bring heaviness of job home to wife
Men will be men… sad story
Planning to go to a strip club without your knowledge alone is shady. Where he got her number and why he saved it, shady. Her calling to make sure he’s still coming, shady. Y u are on bedrest…“threatened abortion” shady 
Lies. Follow your gut.
Looks like your boyfriend has 2 girlfriends. Just because you do NOT have sex … does NOT mean … he did NOT cheat! He is LooKing. End of STORY. 
He is lying. You are pregnant. If he is messing with strippers…and you’re pregnant…he is risking your baby. He is selfish and he is a liar and if you just let it go then he will know he can continue on.
There’s a reason you don’t trust him… why allow someone to waste your time? Respect yourself enough to walk away. Is this the type of behavior you want for your kids as an example? He’s never going to admit to any wrongdoing
I guess we‘ve all been there… that’s why all comments are the same. Trust your gut. Most of the lies men tell us dont even make sense. Why is the number saved then?
I still never understand why women have babies with me that aren’t making commitments or still in the dating phase. Babies don’t keep men, they create trouble. Old saying …if you’re happy, have a baby, it’ll give you something to fight about. Today people think it’s the opposite because they are doing it too soon and then left to raise kids on their own. As for him, if he’s going to strip clubs he’s not ready to settle down aka kids are settling down (for u anyway). Take it on face value and if he’s not going out or late coming home then he’s not doing anything wrong. If he is…you know the answer and getting upset to the point of miscarriage is not good. Your mind is your worst enemy…give it time and it will show you what you need to do. Good Luck
What does your gut tell you?
And there you have your answer
Number should be in note book for phone. Dump the rat you deserve better
You know him we don’t…what is ur gut telling u we can give U our opinion but in the end it’s ur decision on what u want to do. Personally I think he’s lying to u just from what u wrote. It’s up to u if u want to believe what he has said and go on about ur relationship or u can forgive him for urself and move on without him or forgive him and work on ur relationship. Either way it’s going to be hard. But take care of urself since u have a very high risk pregnancy. Good luck and I wish nothing but the best for u.
I’d run now! This will be the rest of your life.
Two kids and still a boyfriend should tell you all you need to know.
Initial instinct is 99.9% right everytime.
Call and ask to speak with her, trust me she will be more than willing to tell you Everything, if you don’t want to find out the truth drop it and keep on going, me personally would have been in that club that night, pregnant or not, cause our mind is our worst enemy we go on and on thinking all kind of things, very easy to find out, go talk to her, I am not saying go fight, or go and cause trouble, your husband should be the one in trouble, JS.
Hes lying and u dont deserve a liar. Baby on the way…u have family and friends to help you…fuck him! Get rid of him now before he hurts u more!
How is it you have 2 brothers-in-laws? Find a lawyer and start the process to get child support now.
Your first priority is your baby it is what it is with him hes in the wrong putting himself in that situation
Discernment. If you feel something is wrong most likely it is.
Marriage isnt required for a man and a woman with kids to have a family. That is a personal choice between the adults. This thing ppl saying 2 kids and no ring is kinda annoying in that respect. I have an ex with kids and yea he is an ex but that has nothing to do with a ring. So besides that…u know him. Does he have a history of lying? Does he try and keep u from his phone and hide stuff? It is possible he is telling the truth but follow ur gut. If ur gur says something not rite then follow that. Just dont use the kids as a reason to stay. That never ends well.
There’s actually a pretty simple way of verifying his story if you’re brave enough. Call Janet. Don’t accuse her of anything, just explain what happened and that you want to verify his story. If she’s dating him then she’ll get upset and you have your answer. Don’t react if she gets upset. If she doesn’t get upset but verifies his story, well, then there you go. I know that’s a hard thing to suggest you do. I would be terrified to do that if it was my boyfriend. Do what you’re comfortable with.
Now honestly, does his reasoning even make a speck of sense? The answer is no.
No I would be soo upset!! You have every right. Obviously Janet feels very comfortable with your boyfriend n that is extremely disrespectful. You need to remember that your baby feels EVERYTHING you feel, so you need to take care of yourself.
If he told you what happen n you’ve got free access to his phone ? I’d ask the girl who she’s trying to contact n if he’s bieng honest great if he’s lied bye bye I’d be done 
You aren’t married so you cant say anything. He’s your Boyfriend… I’m confused why you would have another kid with someone.
how does he treat his mother and he is a cop they get people calling them all the time for strange things my husband was a cop and he was faithful to me
I had a counselor that told me a man tells you in 15 minutes of meeting them all about themself and the way he treats his mother tells you how he will treat you
I would have just talked to the girl and found out what the situation was prior to confronting him. It’s so easy for men to blame it on a friend/brother. If a friend was spose to meet up with her there is zero reason your man should have her number and it most certainly shouldn’t be in his phone if he met her for some police business. Also had he met her over some police business why would she be asking for him to come over after said situation was done. Sounds like a bunch of shit to me.
Your gut is always right , should have listened mine years ago,
Seriously? Is this a question!!!
Please focus on you and your baby’s health first…worry about his wahala later.
#1 I could have NEVER kept quiet!
#2 You know he’s lying if your even questioning it. Get rid of Pinocchio 
before he causes more damage. I know it feels like the end of the world. ITS NOT! It gets better and you deserve better.
No get rid of him you will just keep on doing this speaking from experience
Well he is a police officer and most of them cheat and lie and cover up for each other I’ve personally have seen their behavior on they’re so called “ guys night out so nope I wouldn’t believe him!!
What are you confused about? He is lying and he is cheating. Time to move on.
And it’s not a threatened abortion it’s called a miscarriage.
You know your man and know what he’s capable of. Dont play dumb. She doesn’t really want advice. She wants to hear everything is fine so she can find solace in staying. Only when her piss starts burning or mysterious bumps pop up will she get the message 
. I bet her dude would exit stage left it things were reversed. Have the same standards.
Don’t worry about him right now because u can’t control him but u can try and control your situation by taking it easy and listen to your doctor. Just pray on him and give him enough rope to see what he does with it. He’s not your child focus on you and your chilld
Sorry girl, he’s clearly cheating in one way or another with that stripper. Of course he’s gonna lie to you. 
Take care of your baby first.
I’d move along if I were you.
Why put your dirty laundry out to the public
So if I had dealings with the police and the officer knew I was a taxi driver is he allowed to call me personally for a ride? No.
Easier said than done w/2 kids to consider. Guess would depend on how he acts towards you most of the time and the kids as well. If happens again I wouldn’t be able to trust him anymore.
Your boyfriend is full of shit
Im sorry hun, its hard to leave someone u love but it’s what u gotta do
He’s lying. He gave a stripper his number. That would be enough for me to leave his ass.
I dated a cop who told me all his friends have “beat wives” when they’re on the beat. I used to see this married cop going to my neighbor’s all the time too. Not only that but I going to the strip club with a pregnant woman at home? Eekkk
Get rid of him. He is lying!
No body.can tell u.what to.do only.u.know if u.have these suspisions u have desicions to make you ask yourself how long can I.go on not.knowing what’s.fact.or fiction. Go stay.with.family.for a while talk to them make.your.desicion good.luck
Check both sides.than do what’s best for you and baby. It’s your life
Follow your gut it’s always right
You don’t trust him.
Follow your intuition and do not allow to be gaslighted.
Why would he hand his personal number over ? If she wanted to deal with his specifically as an officer she would ring the station and ask if he was on duty …I feel . Sorry hun ,but I would question him again or ask one of his brothers in law the truth X
Having been engage to two police officers. I know they are notorious for this. Don’t forgive it. Because it will happen again.
My daughters babies dad. Police officer. Did it to her pregnant on her birthday. Get a lawyer and leave when he not around.
Of course you’re not overreacting. ANYONE would reacted that way! He’s totally in the wrong. He shouldn’t have hid this from you. IF that’s even true. Smh. I wouldn’t be able to deal because he already lied by hiding it. And while you’re pregnant? Absolutely ignorant to pull this, now. And I don’t believe him.
He’s sneaky…
99.9% of police , are…
He’s lying. If that’s all it was, as he said then he should have told you a few days ago when he made the decision to go. Also, just bc you are going to a strip club doesn’t mean a “girl” wld have your number and need to confirm in the middle of the night unless she (they) were waiting for him/them, etc. I wld have a lot of questions. I’m not saying you shld leave him BUT he is lying. Sorry you have to worry about this while pregnant.
Do u really need some one to spell this out for u. It is as clear as a glass window. He is up to no good. If u chose to look the other way. Kids or not. I would bet. It is not over. He will keep right on playing u for a fool. Men who hang out in strip bars cheat on their wives. That is so plain to see.
What the hell is a “threatened abortion”???
Maybe he is just the plug 
No sympathy for u it’s ur fault u let him treat u that whay I’m sure this is not the first time red flag accrue u just dumb to deal with it now ur asking people what u should do …Lol it not hard to get rid of his ass
Leave now and stop having kids with him.
The explanation isn’t logical. Your gut knows
Leave before the baby arrives
I left my now ex husband just for going in a strip club, so my answer to this would be…LEAVE! He’s not worth it.
I’m old and wiser now…me now… I’d dump his ass!!!back in the day I’d forgive but not forget!do they change!? unlikely…am I single? Yes !!!why?but the choice for you is your decision…I believe if you’re happy with a partner? one shud never feel otherwise…do take care … Goodluck 
Hes LYING… Guys only get stripper numbers for two reasons. To fuck them (or think they will) or to do business AGAIN usually outside the establishment. Period. I’d know stripper here for 20yrs. Dudes a trick and wont ever admit it.
Ouch! Theres no excuse for that! Youre def not overreacting i wouldve acted ALOT worse and beat his ass! U gotta use ur best judgement, raise that child being the example of how a woman should really be treated and put an end to that…theres NO REASON another woman u never heard of or a strip club number should be calling his phone so give him the option to cut that shit off or stay away from u…let him make the choice!
He’s lying. He won’t change. You’re on baby number 2 and he’s still just a boyfriend. Don’t get me wrong, husbands cheat too, but he doesn’t even respect you enough to offer you a committment while making 2 kids with you.
You stay with him, in another year you’ll be on baby #3 and he will still be cheating on you.
You think you can make them feel something by making babies with them but those narcissists are only thinking of themselves. You don’t mean anything to him and the kids probably dont either.
Don’t hang around and waste another 5 years of your life on this guy.
Dump him and either be with someone who respects you or be alone.
Single mom is better than getting an STD every time he runs around on you.
Go to strip club and ask her, she will tell you, also ask her to pull up his calls and see if the same amount of calls are on her log
It’s disgusting that so many men would cheat on their wife/gf while they are pregnant with their child! Don’t let this go. Tell your sisters or friends to investigate. Meanwhile you have to take care of yourself and don’t stress out. If he is a cheater, leave him. Once a cheater is always a cheater.
He hasn’t committed to you yet, despite knocking you up twice. Get a clue, YOU are his side chick.
I wouldnt believe it red flags for sure
He could be telling the truth
I’ve always said if I had to question anything , I dont need it !!! If you have to look through his phone let him go … Hanging out with friends all the time knowing damn well he has a gf and kids at home , again let his ass go … I can do bad all on my own shit … js
Him being a cop is a definite cheater sign. He’s cheating
Do you trust him? Is it worth losing your your be baby over? What is your gut/intuition be telling you?
Sad… sweetie it will only get worse…n worse… unfortunately
Cheater… say bye bye now… still coming over means he had said he would at some point… who was he lieing to you or her… if her why not say no why did he need to lie to the stripper? Just say no going home to my gf…
Am I the only one who’s thinking this story is fake?
The fact that you turned super sleuth the minute his phone beeped tells me there’s no trust in this relationship. That fact it was another woman calling him tells me your suspicions are warranted.
Look you are having your second kid with this guy. You know something is not right in this relationship. You have two choices, couples therapy or cut your losses.
For the sake of your children do that which will make you happy and fulfilled.
PS. No woman calls a man at midnight without understanding the implications of that call. I wouldn’t call my best friend’s husband at that hour much less a strangers SO.
He got her details when she called the police station and now they are communicating independently? Ahh… hello.
I’ve know several strippers and unless they’re pulling a stunt like prostitution that got one of the clubs shut down they shouldn’t be calling clients. That’s a no no. I’d personally say you’re under reacting. He contacted prior which means it’s no just some girl making her money dancing. The bs about the police station makes zero sense. Not even worth the breath to argue over. I’d silent get your things in order to be prepared to leave and leave with help.
I would not even accept my partner going to a strip club. Hell to the no. He is either 100% IN with me, or he is out. Any man going to a strip club, especially if he is in a relationship, is a trashy misogynist and I have no need for him.
If all women had high standards and stuck to them, these guys would either evolve or die off.
LOVE YOURSELF MORE THAN YOU LOVE HIM.