Need advice. My boyfriend and I been dating for about seven months. I am divorced and have a son. He’s been great to my son, and I. Recently noticed that he’s been having angry outbursts over very small things, even if it’s something he doesn’t want to hear, and his mood will change from being completely happy to mad in a matter of seconds. He will ignore me for the day or block me from texting. His brother said he’s been like this for a while, but I have not experienced this since now. It sounds like a personality disorder that was mentioned by his brother, also. My boyfriend doesn’t think he has an issue, and if we even talk about this, he gets mad. He’s been a genuine person since we met. Not sure why the change. Help!
Could be depression it hits alot of people this time of year
Could be depression, my husband gets like this if he doesn’t take his meds.
He could be depressed or be having anxiety issues. Men tend to respond to mental health issues with anger
Maybe he’s depressed…
Run. Run for the hills.
Could also be stress
Maybe hes just burnt out?? I know when i lack sleep and/or burnt out from work and life, ill completely flip and turn into a completely different, HORRIBLE person…
Get a new boy friend
Make him your ex boyfriend and let it go. Boyfriends are not husbands, they’re temporary.
He didn’t change.
Now his true colors are coming out.
Get out of this relationship immediately
Red flags time to go!
Could be a mental disorder or drugs tell him to go get checked out or leave him it hasn’t been that long if he is acting like this now imagine living together you don’t want that for your child to witness
In my experience he either needs meds or he’s doing drugs. Good luck. I go through it with mine too.
His true colors are showing… RUN
Goodness… read the signs… your whole life will be like this!!!
Are you the first person he’s dated with kids? Dating a single parent when you aren’t one can be difficult
My husband became that way after a few years. Either he accept there is a problem or run.
He is a boyfriend.
Just a boyfriend. Peace out and show more discretion with introducing people into your son’s life.
Red flag! My ex was like this until he wasn’t ignoring me, he was smacking me around. Leave now before it gets worse.
Red flags for sure. get out. Check out gaslighting.
Regardless of his issues depression or whatever, DO NOT leave them wash all over you trust me! And anyway you have a little boy you need to think about, what if your partner’s behaviour starts to affect him? What if he starts getting angry at your son? Run for the hills or you’ll regret it. I’m still looking over my shoulder over past experiences with someone I regret not leaving sooner. Life isn’t all about being with someone, alot of people prove they’re not worth it
Its depression. Please encourage him to get help
I would get out while I could…red flags all over this post honey. I don’t care if he might be depressed…run. Run. Run
He could possibly be a narcissist.
Get out of it before a bad thing happens
Thats how it starts. From experience, please get out before it goes further. I’m currently 2 years in with mine and we just had a baby. Its not healthy and its not going to change. Please help yourself
Kind of sounds like he’s bipolar. I would walk away now before you get in more deep I only say that because its not going to get better if he’s not going to get some kind of help for it and you don’t want your son to be around that. My bf is bipolar and it drives me bat s***crazy and he gets like that around our kids.
About 7 months doesn’t seem like a lot of time to truly know someone or to know all their quirks. And I have seen this quite a few times. Is 7 months a normal amount of time to introduce someone to your child ?
If that’s not the biggest red flag ever… it will soon get worse… it’s up to u to leave or stay… but cause u have a baby an u dont want that rubbing off on ur child …I would leave him alone
Get out of that relationship while u can it will only get worse seen this happen a million times.
Narcissist run away while u can girl it will only get worse he will have complete control over u before you even realize whats goin on
Yeah, it’s probably not going away. I would get out while you can. The blocking and stuff is just childish. I also agree with the person that says he either needs meds or doing drugs.
Congratulations, you’ve made it to the point in your guys relationship where true colors are showing up
Anger can be a real issue. Forget he doesnt see what’s wrong. You do and your child does. I’d give an ultimatum before it gets out of hands. The fact that he doesn’t see an issue is a problem. Take it from someone married to someone with anger issues. It’s taken therapy on multiple occasions for us to get through it and his willingness. He’s never hit me but living with anger is toxic for everyone.
Run run fast and don’t look back
A person with a personality disorder will convince you they don’t have one. Read up on different personality disorders and see if one fits what you’re experiencing, but don’t ignore what his brother said!
Sounds like a case of narcissistic personality disorder.
If you stay it will get worse he will start beating you up next
The brother says he has had this issue. He has hidden it from you and is now coming out. If you want to continue the relationship, you need to encourage him to seek medical help. You have to protect your child and yourself. He can get help and learn to better handle things and get meds if that is needed.
Narcisstic behaviour get out
I read this book called “End your Addiction Now” and it was all on brain balance and gut byoim (sp). I did the quizzes and took the vitamins/amino acids and such that were indicated by the results of the quiz. Basically giving you the building blocks to make your own melatonin…I felt a dif the first time. The lil black cloud vanished…
Could be personality disorder
Dont start nothing… there won’t be nothing.
Sounds like stress or depression. But really, it’s a symptom for a lot of things.
His unwillingness to sit and talk about it though it’s a red flag just for your own safety though.
Think about your child. Do you want him to see you get treated badly? What do you think he would be like when he is older in his own relationship. This isn’t just you here. I’d walk away. My biggest fear is who are you when I’m not around my child.
Yep red flags. I’d leave now before it gets worse
RUN RUN RUN! You can’t fix this and you shouldn’t have to. Something is wrong, it’s a HUGE RED FLAG, and before it’s more than a “boyfriend” I’d be ghosting him. I’ve known many women killed in front of their child by a man like this, and unfortunately, they kill the kids too.
Time to find a new boyfriend. You don’t need the grief.
Sounds like hes showing his true colors
- If its bi polar and he refuses to get help it seriously isnt worth it for you and your son to stay. 2. If my bf EVER and I mean ever blocked me from flipping texting I’d leave his ass immediately. That is NOT something a grown adult does. Seriously. Cut your losses at only 7 months.
Maybe scared of commitment. If not whatch what you do, don’t put you and your new son in any kind of danger
That’s me… Your boyfriend is me
Is he a sagittarius?
Why is it always a mental condition?
Maybe hes just not ready for an instant family? Or just rethinking your relationship.
Are you living with him with your kid only after 7 months?
So people with bipolar disorder or depression don’t deserve love? A relationship? Understanding? These people need more love, more understanding and help. Sounds like he needs prayers and to know God and His love more than anything
It is time to move on if that man is putting you on block and having burst of anger he is moving on mentally it’s not going to be long before physically he puts his hands on you take care of you and your son
Everyone telling her to get out and leave wth. What if this man truly loves her and shes loves him and he does need help. Do any of you know how hard it is to admit you have something wrong with you. Excepically mentally. I waa just diagnosed with bipolar and depression luckily my husband didnt just walk out of me. Get his family together and all of you discuss things over dinner some of us dont have family memebers that cared enough when we were youngrr to actually get down to the problem.
Stress. Depression or hes cheating
Could be what others have said depression or stress but most abusive situations don’t start out abusive. They make you think that they are a genuine person. They will rope you in and get you right where they want you and once they feel they have you they tend to do what they want and expect you to stay. Ignoring you is a type of abuse. Abuse can be what is said or what is not said. It is not always about hitting you. However, if someone is having anger problems over small things that do not matter what will they do over the bigger things? Anger issues and Abuse go hand in hand and start off small and get bigger. He try’s to punish you by not speaking to you when he gets mad at you. That is a form of trying to isolate you and make you think it is all your fault. If he raises his voice to you and try’s to turn the table on you. That is a form of abuse. If he will threaten you he will eventually follow through. Like I said abuse does not start over night. It is a gradual process. Definitely should look up the signs of abuse.
Unfortunately after 6 months spouse’s tend to show their true colors. If his like this now, that’s cause he got comfortable enough to show you the true him. Best run while you can. I stayed with mine for 2 years, and he abused me. Trust me, it’s not worth the heartache later. Rip the band-aid off now.
Why do so many women put up with this kinda shit? It literally boggles my mind!
From experience I have bipolar, I just had a baby 9 days ago and I do alot of these things. Except for not talking/ignoring my fiance or blocking his texts, I dont do all of those things all of the time but alot of the times I do. I dont take medicine and my fiance had the same issue. He also could be doing it because of stress or depression. My fiance gets mad too but if I let him cool down and leave him alone for a bit he comes back to me apologizing and explaining what was wrong. Hes like me when hes mad he cant get the words to come out right and gets mad and just shuts down. Try to not talk to him about it every single time it happens but I would recommend talking to him about getting put on medication. I will soon have to be put on medication as well. Also I should add my fiance and I have been together for pretty much a year
I would think that he might be unhappy in the relationship tbh… guys alot of the time dont like to talk about issues, they just simply check out… maybe hes doing something shady and is looking for excuses to be mad, that way he doesnt feel as bad… if that’s not it then it could be simply anger issues or a newly developed drug habbit like pills or something… either way this early on in the relationship, for you and your child sake you should consider ending the relationship
Erin away. Mental illness is no joke esp if he doesn’t get treatment.
Omg yall females always trip me out in these posts. everyone has bad days, or maybe he is unhappy…doesnt mean hes going to murder or beat her and her child. I feel like I have stepped into a cult full of bitter and negative women.
Sounds like he was trying to hide a mental health issue that he’s been battling with for awhile. People who are struggling mentally deserve to be loved just as much as everyone else, but it’s also crucial that you create healthy boundaries for you and your son as needed. His symptoms are a reason for his behavior, but you don’t have to feel obligated to forgive or deal with it if you don’t want to. I would encourage you to try to get him the help he needs with a social worker or psychologist and try to let him heal himself. If you don’t have the right space to handle that currently or you feel it’s too much, you have to make that decision for yourself and let him know it’s not something you’re willing to deal with and leave the situation.
You need to get to the bottom of this, if it’s drugs you and your son are in danger!
Show him as much attention that u put onto fb !!!
It’s a whole lot of toxicity. And it’s probably a mental illness, however, it is not your responsibility or obligation to help him seek treatment if he refuses to accept that something is wrong. Get out while you can.
Well I wouldn’t consider having the entire Facebook community chime in on your relationship a small issue, but to each her own
Its called gaslighting in the beginning of a relationship. Get out now. Narcissistic traits
If he doesn’t want to change then there is nothing you can do but leave. His behavior is a form of emotional abuse and you should not expose yourself or your son to that. Do not stay and pretend it’s okay or try to change someone who doesn’t think he has a problem. Leave him.
I know you said you have talked with him, but sit and tell him that he needs to get help or you can’t stay. When my husband and I started dating I was a bit crazy, would fly off the handle at little things, he told me to get some help or he had to move on. I got help because I knew I needed and wanted him in my life. You have to make your point across to him or he won’t ever get the help he needs. Good luck to the both of you!
You’ve only been dating 7 months. Get out now if not for you, do it for you son. Things will just get worse.
Idk why hes acting that way but you’ve only been dating 7 months and have a kid and are recently divorced…RUN! Many people cling to someone after a divorce YOU are a queen. Don’t settle. I don’t want to sound cold but only 7 months &all these red flags not saying he’s a bad person but some woman don’t make it out of relationships that start that way. Run…good men are out there(as are good woman) keep looking and DON’T SETTLE
Could he be bipolar? My husband gets like this at times, it’s difficult
So, you were told that he has a diagnosed disorder, he wont get help. You are actually wondering what to do? Girl! RUN!
RUN!!!
It’s only been 7 months RUN BITCH RUUUUN
Lol my favourite movie quote not actually calling you a bitch.
Well if he does have an issue he doesn’t acknowledge it so you may want to rethink this relationship.
If he can’t talk abt it, he won’t get help.
Whatever it is, it’s on him to fix.
Now, is this how you want your son to act?
It’s time to let him go and pls consider dating a long while before anyone meets your child.
Sometimes personality disorder can be hidden from the SO. But eventually over time, the honeymoon wears off. His true colors appear.
It could be a number of things.
Substance abuse, drugs or alcohol?
PTSD?
Trauma he witnessed?
Or a combination of all the above. Plus mental illness that’s not being treated.
Somthing could be bothering him. Work. Family etc. Don’t just assume the worst. Guys have a harder time opening up then we do. It took my husband & I going to counseling to get him to open up. Maybe try doing the same. If he doesn’t want to except it then move on from it. Don’t accume him off anything until you have actual proof. Aslong as he’s not being abusive I don’t see why y’all can’t work it out. Guys can have outburst too. Get to the bottom of it, at the end of the day you can take our advice or make a choice on your own. Just makes sure it’s the best choice for you and your son.
All these woman telling her to leave you know mentally it ain’t as easy for a male they get worried they get scared to lose you small things make them think your gonna walk out their lives everyone deserves help or at least she should sit down a d ask him if we are going to carry on we need to talk about how you might be feeling I mean 7months in you really know nothing about his past and what not bad things could have happened to him maybe certain things or the way things are done or said set triggers off … Her walking out could cause suicidal thoughts he may block her and ignore her so he doesn’t hurt her
The party hat has come off. It takes about 6 months. Your getting ready to see the real him. We’re always on our best behavior the first year. Then the real you comes out. I wish you the best.
You know what you need to do, so do it!
Nope cant fix it dont EVEN try
His brother would know .
Get a way, your son is more important!
Get away from him- now!
It’s not your responsibility to fix him. He needs help.
Sometimes medications can bring about a behavior change has he recently been prescribed a new med? Also men experience there own brand of menapause (lol) usually around 45 yrs of age
If hes not willing to admit he has a problem and seek help you need to think of you and your son first and move on
It will only get worse
Your just now getting to know the real him.
obvious mental health issues…or hes cheating
Your son comes first. You do not need this in you life. He will not change. A drunk will never admit he is a drunk. Basically he will not admit to his problem.
I’m with Sandy Bangs RUN AND DON’T LOOK BACK !!! I have Been There Before AND IT DID GET WORSE !!
Get out now that how a narcacist acts my baby dad was the most amazing man to me and my kids at beginning then dragged me in made me fall in love and changed he has gone from physical abuse to emotional and now almost four yr he just up left me and our son and my three kids he was dad to but always has to come back in lately on occasion and threaten me so ur best to just leave get away before things end up bigger ness he won’t change things will only get worse ad u will go from being happy exciting person to very miserable
I thought we just had this exact question the other day, worded differently. No?