QUESTION:
“I Am a single mom in a relationship. I have a daughter who’s five from a previous relationship, and my Boyfriend of 2.5 years is complaining that I want to split the rent and household expenses. Stating he shouldn’t have to pay half when there’s three of us… meaning the five-year-old. Am I wrong to think he should be paying half? I do get a small amount in child support that I use towards her expenses specifically. Thoughts?”
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TOP ANSWERS (AS SELECTED BY MODERATOR):
“I agree with that being a huge red flag. Find a man that will love her as his own and not basically say she is a burden without saying it by saying he shouldn’t pay half bc of a small child. You and her deserve better and it should be 50/50.”
“I just asked my fiance to get a man’s perspective and he said: When you’re with someone who has a child you take them on too. And he’s lucky you’re even paying half the rent. (He has always paid our rent though).”
“I think you should leave that relationship, imagine if he’s being unfair with rent now that’s she’s five how he will treat her as she grows older. You both deserve better.”
“That’s a man who will soon resent your child in many other ways as well. I would make preparations to cut him loose.”
“Your child is an EXTENSION of you. She is her own person but she is nowhere near an age where you should worry about paying bills or rent.”
“Ask yourself, if it was his child would he act the same? If the answer is no, then you have not invested your time into a relationship that will be beneficial for you. He should see your daughter as his daughter. Most relationships nowadays are on a 50/50 financial split so everyone contributes equally and everyone can have the same opportunities to save and splurge on yourself as you see fit.”
“If he isn’t willing to split 50/50 and treat her like his own child, then why is he with someone that has a child. If you get married he would be the stepdad.”
“If he is thinking this way now, he will never accept your child as his. Please think hard and long about what he is saying. After being together for 2 1/2 years and pulling this. He is looking for a way out. Give it to him”
“Adults are the only ones working! Half definitely. If he is that petty think about the future… it will probably not improve…”
“If he’s not prepared to accept that you and your daughter come as a package, then get rid.”
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