My Boyfriend Is Demanding a Threesome

Relationships
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QUESTION:

"My s/o and I have been together 2 years I just had his baby two months ago ..I have two other children from a previous relationship he's good to us most of the time…I couldn't be happier .. but then he gets in these moods where he demands a threesome from me . Saying if I don't have one then we're done or he's leaving with our daughter while I'm at work, or we aren't having sex until I give him a threesome….it's all he will talk about and we argue horribly about it for days until he gets out of his funky mood . He tells me text people he posts it on my story knowing it bothers me …..he tells me how pretty I am but about a month after I had our baby he called me fat ugly and disgusting and it hasn't left my head I'm literally so self cautious n suffering with postpartum depression horribly….im literally so hurt and the postpartum depression doesn't help im just so confused one week he's everything I want / need then the next he's demanding a threesome I know most of you are going to say leave obviously but it's easier said then done ….I need prayers so God can give me the strength to let go of something I know that needs to be let go of ….not just for myself but for my babies …."

RELATED: I Agreed to Do Something Uncomfortable with My Husband, but Now I Want Out: Any Advice?

TOP ANSWERS (AS SELECTED BY MODERATOR):

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The following top answers have been selected by a moderator from hundreds of responses to the original question.

"He’s giving you an ultimatum. That’s abusive behavior"

"He sounds horrible! Actually read this as if it was your best friend telling you about her man. What would you tell her to do?"

"Ask him which one of his friends he’s bringing into the bedroom."

"This is not acceptable behavior at all… even if you guys have previously had threesomes before… I hope you find the strength in yourself that you need to get through this and make a happy life for you and your children"

"What he is doing is abuse. Don’t engage. Make a plan. Leave. It’ll help that post partum"

"Nah take him out to the curb with the rest of the trash,"

"Don’t let anyone treat you that way!"

"He’s giving you an ultimatum. I wouldn’t cave because it’ll be never ending. Trust me."

"I couldn’t imagine. I am so sorry. Some people are into that stuff but you are clearly not and it’s unfair to demand that of you. I hope you find the strength to move on and find peace"

"How disgusting of someone to behave that way and you just had his baby!! You’re only 2 months postpartum too like…he’s insensitive and I hope you see the red flags for what they are are run!!"

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Threesome with a woman? He’s kinky and his sex life is more important to him than you are. Threesome with a man? He’s bi or gay, and his sex life is more important to him than you are. See the pattern there? With everything you are going through… he is NOT making you a priority. Is this about financial security? What’s more important, being financially secure, or becoming a shell of the person you want to be? Start lining up some options and get out, there is nothing to save here, unless he is open to counseling and criticism.

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He’s got to go, next time he threatens to leave tell him to go, he said h3 would take the baby that is bull.
What is he going to do with the baby ?
I would tell him take the baby and get out.
He won’t last a couple hours with the baby. That is just to scare you.
I lived in your position and it will NEVER change.
When I left it was the best decision in my life and I had 4 kids.
Ask yourself, Do I want to live like this and with this selfish ass for the res5 of my life. NO is the answer.
Prayers for strength :heart::heart::pray::pray::pray::pray::pray:

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Run. It is abusive behavior, and especially threatening to just take your child? And your only 2 months postpartum and only recently cleared to be sexually active again. I work at a mental health clinic, ive been a single mom to 2 kids before. You have options, you will feel better being out of that environment. Your kids witness that and it will affect their lives. You need to get out fast. There are womens shelters and domestic abuse hotlines that can help get you resources and housing and protect you from him. This is not normal behavior and it will get worse.