My boyfriend is mad that I slept with someone else when we were broken up: Advice?

Me and my boyfriend of years broke up recently. He’s 26 I’m 23. When we broke up i thought for sure we wasn’t getting back together. I went out met a guy and slept with him :woman_shrugging:t3: not usual for me but I did it and have no feelings and no contact with the guy by the phone choice! 2 weeks after me and my ex get back together. He finds out and is MAD. Mind you we broke up because HE wanted to. And cheated on me twice during the relationship but I forgave him. (My choice I know) so my question is, is that normal? Would any man react this way? I don’t feel im wrong I was single used protection and told him.

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Help a mama out and respond anonymously on our forum. https://answers.mamasuncut.com/t/my-boyfriend-is-mad-that-i-slept-with-someone-else-when-we-were-broken-up-advice/20439

My question is why did you get back together with him when he cheated on you? Not once but TWICE!!! Have more respect for yourself!

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They can do it to us with no conscience or remorse but if we do it their whole respiratory system shut down 🤦🏼‍♀🤣

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Leave him and stay away he has no right being mad

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Um that’s manipulation. Sorry. No and run. Especially cheating twice than getting mad at you when y’all broke up.

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He’s projecting a double standard. He can have sex with TWO people while in a relationship with you. But wants to throw a mantrum when you sleep with someone else after HE breaks up with you :joy: it’s as ridiculous as you think it is. Also, you should revisit if this is the type of relationship you want. If he cheated 2x and had no “reason” don’t think it’s going to stop now. He will use this as a reason next time

I hope you two don’t have kids

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He’s manipulating you. You need to break up with him for good. Its ok for him but never ok for you. That’s toxic. Its not ok. You deserve better.

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Obviously :roll_eyes: it’s like an open relationship :face_with_open_eyes_and_hand_over_mouth: f@ck around and then f@ck back with each other​:joy::joy: is there any such word as RESPECT N TRUST in this relationship :woman_shrugging:t3:

Only a douche canoe of a twatwaffle would react this way. That isn’t a man, that’s a boy, a tool. He has no reason to be mad at you, when he’s the one that cheated on you 2x whilst being together - how much ya wanna bet that he slept with someone while y’all were broken up? Better yet, broke up with you to sleep with more people? I’m sure he’s all up in his feelings because you slept with someone that is not him and he thinks he’s the entitled one when there shouldn’t be any entitlement in the first place. Save yourself the heartache and sanity, and find someone better.

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That’s because he feels as if he owns you.

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Sounds like a toxic man to me, not worth the effort and unnecessary drama. You weren’t in the wrong, at all.

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A boy who did the same thing and is still doing will react this way.

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He will probably cheat on you again and still be mad about this

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Shouldn’t be an issue.

He’s jealous and it is his issue to deal with, not yours.

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It’s ok for them to mess around, but once you do it back to them, oh the world ends…

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You guys need to grow up

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Why is every question on this page about a bf or husband that is obviously horrible and should be left?? Is it not obvious that your significant other isn’t so significant?

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So he cheated on you twice and is mad that you had sex with someone when you were broken up? Too bad. Tell him to get over it. He should’ve kept it in his pants while you were together. He’s a walking red flag. It’s none of his business who you decide to have sex with while you’re broken up. You’re free to have sex with whoever you want and however many people you want! He’s a narcissist. F*ck him. He’ll probably use that as justification in his mind to cheat on you again.

You’re not wrong at all. Dude needs to get over himself lol maybe he shouldn’t break up next time and work through things like an adult.

If it happened when y’all weren’t together it’s not any of his business and he has no business questioning anything you’ve done when you were alone because of him in the first place girly. Just a thought. Just like he wouldn’t explain it to you if he was to do it when you guys were separated & if he was to tell you it wasn’t your business. You did your part by letting him know that you did, just in case because you never actually know, PROTECTION is key.

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Wow red flags narcissist!

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He cheated twice and you took him back. This just proves men can’t handle what they themselves do :joy: leave him it’s super toxic sounding anyway

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He will bring it up in any argument you guys have in the future to try to shame you. You had every right to get some action, he’s the cheating piece of shit. Just save yourself the drama and leave him. If he’s mad about it he will never let it go.

Move on … both of you!

If you were not with him,you could have done whatever you wanted…

Why are you back with him? He cheated on you left your ass then gets mad you slept with someone after he left your ass. :triangular_flag_on_post: don’t waste one more minute on this loser.

Move on hun, it won’t get any better from here.

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If you guys were broken up your free to do as you wish and he has no reason to be mad because unlike him you didn’t do it while you were together tell to f+@# off and I’m sure he will use you being with someone else while you were broken up as an excuse to cheat on you again

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he’s cheated on you twice, you should of left a long time ago. Are you wrong for sleeping with someone else while you were single? of course not. Girl just leave.

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Lol it’s normal for him to be like that. Guys can’t handle the shit they give out. He’s gonna act like you did something completely wrong to him :joy: leave him be. Tell him well you were with someone WHILE we were together.

In 5 years you two wont remember each others middle names… end it for good and move on now…

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Wait!! So he cheated on you twice, while y’all was together, you forgave him, BUT when y’all was split you slept with one and he’s mad??? Sounds like he can’t take what he gives out​:woman_shrugging:t3::woman_shrugging:t3:

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You could have went out and stripped for a bachelor party then joined a gang bang after and it still wouldn’t be any of his business because YOU WEREN’T TOGETHER. Sounds to me like he broke up with you to try and head for greener pastures, then realized that pasture ain’t so green or the farm keep didn’t want him grazing on her grass. Then upon finding out you got some nookie while separated and he didn’t, he’s choosing to be hostile about it. Just contact Whole Man Garbage Services and put him on the curb.

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You are not wrong, he is. How dare he get mad at you for this. It’s not like you cheated…perhaps you need to upgrade to a man who treats you better instead of blaming you for things that HE does.

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Let me guess, he has narcissism.

Why are you downgrading again?

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Wait is this like a new Friends debate? You know “Did Ross actually cheat on Rachel?”

Anyways, those are some serious red flags.
Would he have a right to be upset if you legitimately cheated on him? Sure, but we also don’t throw stones when we live in glass houses. :person_facepalming:
But the fact that you two were broken up, & he broke up with you because HE cheated, & then has an issue with you sleeping with someone when you were BROKEN UP… Leave his narcissistic ass, because it’s only going to get worse.

You are too young to be dealing with a man who has already cheated on you! Be single live life and have fun!! The right one will come! (To answer your question though no he has no right to be mad)

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And he will continue to cheat on u and now that he knows u did that he’ll use it against u. You did nothing wrong why don’t u love yourself and move on. He’s toxic.

You lost me at he cheated on u 2ce and wanted the break up. Who fkn cares if he’s mad. Why don’t you get mad for yourself??

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Remind him that hes often wrong and stupid but you forgive him. :slight_smile:

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U both have a toxic relationship just move on!

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If ya’ll were broken up then it’s not cheating. Why did you take him back after cheating on you twice? I don’t get why men thinks it’s ok to do it, but if a woman does it it’s the end of the world. I’d tell him to kick rocks. Please have some self respect and leave his toxic behind. You deserve way better.

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Yeah a narcissistic a-hole would be mad. He’s a cheating hypocrite. Don’t waste anymore time w him.

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Hahaaaaa . Go girl . And keep going while your at it hun .

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Personally wouldnt have told him. What happens when you’re split up is not his business. You used protection so no risk to him.

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Hes butt hurt cos someone played with his toy while he wasnt, but he didnt mind playing with other toys while he had you …narcassistic tendancies BIG red flags should be going up !! Get rid for your own sanity

Most men would react that way, I think.

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He’s toxic AF and you don’t deserve that. You gave him forgiveness for something he did while in the relationship, but he can’t give you the same respect when you weren’t even together. He’s a trash human. Piss on him. :triangular_flag_on_post::triangular_flag_on_post:

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Leave him to much stress

I suggest you reevaluate this whole situation. Sounds toxic.

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Sounds like you both shouldn’t be together to be honest :joy::joy:

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It’s a control thing and getting back with him was a horrible idea.

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They can f*** anybody they want to with no emotion not a care in the world but girl lord forbid if you do it you the devil​:rofl::rofl::rofl::sob::sob::sob::sob:

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Is sounds like neither one of you are serious about a relationship. I recently heard a saying: you can crumple up a piece of paper, but it will never be the same. Your relationship is tarnished and will never be the same. Move on because neither one of you are serious. This will always be a problem in your relationship

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You’re not wrong for what you did, however, getting back with him sound like the wrong move.

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seems you have a narcissist…
run the other way. and fast.
narcissist do not change

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You slept with someone when y’all weren’t even together and he slept with someone while you guys were together. He’s a walking red flag.

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I’d think long and hard before getting back together with someone who holds double standards like that.

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Boo hoo is what I’d tell him :joy::joy:

He’s mad because he wants to control you. He broke up with you. You weren’t together. You didn’t cheat. I would tell him to either grow the f up, or leave :woman_shrugging:

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It’s a very immature but normal reaction from someone his age. You didn’t do anything wrong. He sounds incapable of being in a healthy relationship right now, so I would suggest moving on with no hard feelings as much as he may have them. Maybe as you both mature, you can come back together further down the line.

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He’s a “Dina’s I say not as I do” guy. Yes he wants to control you. If he cheated when you are together what makes it different now?

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Tell him his audacity is next to none and to get over it. at least you had the decency to sleep with someone else while not in a relationship with him. His hipocrisy would be enough for me to run for the hills and NEVER look back.

Because men can dish it out but can’t take it! He wanted you to sit around and cry about him and because you didn’t he’s butt hurt! No one wants to hear of their SO with someone else but he’s the one who wanted the break up and took that chance! Also what was he doing during the break up? I’ll bet if you went snooping you would find out some things too! He needs to grow up and get passed it or you all just need to break up and move on.

Say “bye Felicia” and move the f on , he’s simply trying to control you.

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Omg his ego is bruised and he is immature. Tell him to go. Girl seriously get yourself someone who will treat you good. Someone who will be faithful and not cry because of things you did as a single girl

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Yes it’s normal. They can’t handle what we do to them but we’re supposed to handle what the do to us.

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U were on a break. Lol kidding. He shouldn’t be mad if u didn’t think u were gonna get back together. He prob just mad u got laid and he couldn’t

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You are not wrong at all

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He lost control of you , that’s why he’s mad. As the saying goes ‘what’s good for the goose is good for the gander’! You’re back together so thus should signal a new start. The past is the past and he needs to get over it

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U didn’t even need to tell him he broke up with you and cheated on you … fuck him guys are crybabies

sounds like you both need Protection, from STD’s, We always told the kids “if you wouldn’t marry the partner, don’t sleep with them” Maybe old fashion, but mutual respect for yourself, your body, and your partner…

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What you have shared are red flags in my opinion. If it was me, I would wonder if a long term relationship is feasible with him and perhaps a waste of time and mental peace. Life is hard enough without the added stressor of a disrespectful partner. Good luck young lady.

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So I think it’s normal for him to be upset. But it sounds like an unhealthy relationship with all this cheating. Just move on

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You did nothing wrong but I think it’s best to break up now. He’s gonna continue to hold it against you, it’ll be an ongoing argument throughout the relationship, and he may or may not retaliate. However, F that, you were not wrong.

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Totally different than what you’re asking but sweetie your relationship will never work out. Break up for good. All you’re doing is repeating a cycle at this point. Lifes too short to be unhappy & in toxic relationships.

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He seems like a hypocrital narcissist!! He cheated during the time you were together but when he finds out you were with someone during the breakup (not cheating), that’s not ok? If I were you, I wouldn’t continue the relationship. It’ll only get worse. He’s going to hold that against you with every minor inconvenience or use it as an excuse to cheat again. Not worth the stress, babe.

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Stay single. Red flag :triangular_flag_on_post:

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Stay away this is toxic. Sad you have to ask

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Y’all were broken up. He doesn’t have the right to object.

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He’s being a HUGE TITY BABY and a hypocrite. It’s a big red flag for me because he can make mistakes but you can’t? That’s called a narcissist sweetie!

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If he keeps bringing it up…run

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Omg listen to ALL of the above. Girl throw that man child away

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He’s a narcissist. Essentially sees that he can do whatever, but you have to conform to his standards or face the consequences. There will almost never be healthy equality with someone like that. Run, and run fast.

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And your man is honestly going to look at you and say that he didn’t sleep with anyone during the breakup …he only does it when he is actually in a relationship with you …open your eyes you guys spilt up for a reason and that reason has not changed .it’s actually worse because he knows that he can cheat and you will forgive him .when there is not consciences for his actions than there is no reason to stop

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Well you better expect for him to cheat again because he will and hes gonna use you sleeping with another guy when you were broken up isn’t excuse. Just be prepared. And he probably slept with somebody else when you guys were broken up, that’s probably why he broke up with you and you just don’t know it.

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You & your bf broke up for 2 weeks & you jumped in bed with someone else in that time? I think you need to re-evaluate what you want in life. It doesn’t seem like you want a partner. You just need sex. With all due respect to you without judgement I suggest you break up with bf. Get in touch with yourself. Learn whether you really want a relationship or just someone in your bed.

That’s called manipulation. Yes, most men will get mad, but not rightfully. If he broke up with you, he gave up the right to be upset about what you did.
Most likely, he’s hurt and it’s coming across in anger, but the anger is misdirected and he should be angry with himself.
I would let him know, if you don’t care enough to keep me, don’t be upset that I’m not desperate enough to stay devoted to a man who didn’t want me.
Best of luck to you.

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Say what i would. :woman_shrugging:t3: thought I was entering hoe phase- and I’m not, or keep this shit up and I am. :woman_shrugging:t3::joy: and he’s cheated boy bye

yea. one guy i was with everytime we d break it off id try n move on n hed get SO pissed at me. :roll_eyes: it was ridiculous. guys are hypocritical assholes

Sleep w peace tonight knowing you won🤣

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Leave him! It’s normal for a man to be upset/sad about it, men take longer usually to process emotions but it’s not normal for him to be gaslighting you and trying to manipulate you. Classic narcissist behavior. It’s okay and justifiable for him to cheat on you, break up with you whenever he wants to do whatever he wants, but you aren’t allowed to have any freedom or choices even when y’all are split up. Please don’t stay in a relationship with a man like this, it’ll just lead to your destruction.

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So he cheated on you twice and then you slept with someone as soon as yous broke up

Y’all aren’t in love. Break up
Its toxic AF

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Throw the whole man away and start over. :wastebasket:

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