Sounds more like cheating to me. You don’t deserve this.
Get him to understand what?? I mean, he’s poly, what did you expect?? You have to be understanding, if you want to be understood. If you want a monogamous relationship, then maybe find a man that’s not poly. I’m not sure how you feel betrayed when you knew what you were getting yourself into.
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It doesn’t sound like this is the type of relationship for you. Maybe, right now, you just don’t need a relationship. You need to heal and work on you and figure out what is truly best for YOU and your kiddo. Just because dude claims the child as his, doesn’t mean it is. This sounds like a new relationship anyways, that child ain’t nobody but YOURS!! Be strong mama and move on.
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Ask your soul, and follow the teachings of your intuition
If he isn’t considerate of your feelings then he’s not a good partner for you 
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Why did you get involved with someone poly when you want to be monogamous. That just doesn’t make sense.
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Do you love him or yourself more?
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I’m sorry but you knew he was poly when you got with him. So if you aren’t then how did you expect this relationship to go? I could never share my husband so the thought of another woman being with him just pisses me off 
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Hey man I get it, I could never do that either. Sometimes I wish I could but I’m entirely too insecure and have abandonment issues and I don’t see those things jiving with having my partner seeing other people.
Sounds more like cheating to me. I don’t understand why people don’t just work on the relationship they are already in. Instead he disregards your feelings and trauma and brings in another person.You don’t deserve this.
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Be a mommy baby worry about your child and yourself. Im sorry about the loss of your dad , you’re probably feeling lonely. Dont settle and move on
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Just why? I don’t get how you deliberately walked into a ‘relationship’ like this, when you know you’re only setting yourself up for heartache. Not judging , but come on. You have to know you and your child deserves better than this.
Really sorry about your dad❤️
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We learn something new everyday. Lol. Idk what poly is. Not sure I want to know. But ??
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Ok First Of All even. Though. he. Was honest. I’d. Say. Use. a. Condom. But. I’d. Dump. Him.
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If he is poly and you are not, the odds of the relationship lasting, or at least being a healthy relationship, are slim.
Also, while I understand he has “never” lied to you, I find it odd she is saying they’re dating. Is his poly lifestyle publicly known? Even if it is, how would she know he was interested in her unless he told her. If he spoke to you about it, and you told him it wasn’t a good time and he still pursued things that’s disrespectful. Poly is about communication. So if he went ahead and explored this relationship behind your back, he broke his own poly rules.
Personally, I’d move on. It doesn’t around like he’s been there for you and you’re already lonely, and instead of helping you through it, he is worried about starting another relationship. Nah I’m out.
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Sounds like he was honest with u … however … u were not honest with urself. If u cant handle the agreed relationship terms … u need to tell him ur feelings have changed … but be prepared if his have not and he is ready to move on to someone who is emotionally and mentally ready for what he wants … not what u wanted to hear I’m sure … sorry
This type of relationship isn’t for everyone. You have to make that choice.
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I don’t think this relationship is what you want, although he has some good qualities you are still going to end up hurt and resenting him! Sorry love
Why would you date a polygamist/polyamorous if you arent one ? Sounds like you set yourself up for this.
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Do you want your child to be loved like you’re being loved? You’re teaching your child
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He doesn’t give a damn!! What makes u think this dude was going to drop the others just to concentrate on your ass in your time of need? He’s not going to. He doesn’t have to. He told u that from the beginning but u didn’t listen because u rather be a silly pick me bitch just to say u have somebody and it backfired on u now that u need somebody to be there for u. The whole point of this poly thing for him is to bang as many other chicks as he wants without having to sneak around to do it, u being fully aware of it and not giving him any lip about it. Being there for u is not part of the arrangement. Since u obviously want more than he is willing to give u need to leave.
Did you know he was poly going into the relationship, or was that a bomb dropped on you after a while? By the sounds of it, monogamous relationships are what you require and you’ll never be happy in a relationship with this man. You can’t ask him to be something that he isn’t. By the sounds of things though, he may have cheated before going to you to discuss it with you.
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So you entered into a relationship with a person who is poly but you aren’t; honestly, should have set the rules right from the start but you are expecting him to change for you rather then both working together. I’d honestly recommend ending it cause you don’t seem to be happy there.
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Nah main relationship is cared for and loved for first tho. Any side is just that a side. Talk to him, poly doesn’t mean they can date and go on date with whoever you guys need to make rules and be very clear honest and open
This isn’t what you WANT this is what you’re SETTLING for
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Poly is one thing, but it includes communication. Dating her without talking to you prior is cheating. Poly or not.
Take her word for it. She says they’re dating. They’re dating, or at least she’s being lead to believe they are.
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He obviously isn’t thinking about you. You hurting and he has found another person. He isn’t for you
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Poly or not isn’t he supposed to be open! But if you aren’t poly it won’t work in my book……poly or not he is supposed to style treat you right!
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So he identified as a cheater. And you get mad when he cheats.
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I’m poly, and yes some new generation polys now are something else. Find a better poly man or any good man out there! He’ll cheat and cheat. Leave him and take care of your own kid and yourself.
It’s not a good example given to your Lil baby. You dont need his toxic arse nor the new gf🙄
You got this mama! Btw: not all polys are like him, we polys that grew up in the islands are loving and caring.
If you’re not comfortable with the dynamic of the relationship, it might be best to walk away.
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Listen make a better life for you and your child . He is never going to understand how you feel because it’s about him and his needs your feeling won’t matter … you shouldn’t have dated someone like that in the first place
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Sounds like too much for me, if your needs aren’t being met then you aren’t the one benefiting from this relationship, he is
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I wouldn’t even be in a relationship with someone who is poly. I don’t feel like it would be healthy for me mentally because I’d feel like I was always competing with someone else. No thanks.
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Okay, that’s not how a poly relationship works. If he wants to broaden things, he has to be able to look after the one he has. Which he is not. There is little reapect and understanding, which means if he took on another girlfriend, this attitude/behaviour would continue.
Drop his sorry a*** if he is not committed and dedicated to you and you only, you do not need him or want him. Find someone who will put you on pedestal, which is what you deserve!
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Come on he is wanting another women dump him
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You two have conflicting lifestyles, so you’re probably not a great match. Set him free and find someone with similar boundaries (monogamy) or be prepared for this to happen —often—. 
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You knew he was poly at the start of your relationship , if you weren’t ok with him being poly why did you start dating him?
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He has been lying to you all all a long , I would have been dumped his as.
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Call it what you want, label it to whatever you will but cheating is still cheating. They added a fancy label so it can be called discrimination to not agree and allow it. Any relationship involving more than one isn’t a real relationship. I said what I said…
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So you have your “boyfriend” asking to date another girl and then this other girl claiming they are already dating 
uh nope not how a poly relationship works and I would know as a friend of mine was in a poly relationship and that’s definitely not how shit happens 
clearly this guy is just looking for another relationship and if he’s willing to do all this claiming your child as his toss him to the curb
wtf is poly? sounds like n excuse to cheat. leave his ass
Are you poly? I feel like for that to be compatible you’d either need to be or y’all have a very set guideline. If you’re not comfortable with it then you need to go. Also, do you want other women brought around you child? That’s something to think about if you’re okay with or not too.
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Get rid of him before you end up pregnant or with an STD. That’s no way to live. You need someone who adores you and only you. Don’t teach your child to be a doormat
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He didn’t lie about who he was… but you seemed to lie to yourself about what you could handle. Seems like there are multiple issues with this relationship.
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If everyone isn’t on the same page and communicating in a ploy relationship it isn’t going to work. I feel like you’re always going to feel like this given he is poly and you are not. He’s clearly putting himself above you already 
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Seems like you lack self-esteem 

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Get you s one womans man
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You entered into this relationship knowing what he is. You can’t expect him to change because you’re having some issues. Sorry. You need to end things if you can’t handle it.
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You got into a relationship with someone who was openly poly, and now you’re mad that he’s poly? Just leave the relationship and find someone who is monogamous
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Run! Don’t walk, away.
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Sounds like he’s in a poly relationship but you’re not? The point of a poly relationship in my opinion is to have someone there for you too, in an emotional capacity if you don’t want the physical, but you are not mentally prepared for a poly relationship and if he cannot accept that, than you need to understand you are not in the right relationship.
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Far too complicated and faffy. If your not comfortable my darling, leave. He clearly still wants others rathernthannto settle and unless ur of the zame.mindset ul just keep ending up hurt zxx
Break up with him!!! I couldn’t handle another person man or woman in my relationship. I know everyone is different butt I need all my man attention especially when I lost my mother
Girl leave. You know what he wants out of a relationship and if you don’t want that also it’s never gonna work
DUMP HIM. You will feel better. There are worse things than alone, there’s alone when you’re with someone.
If you feel unheard, disrespected, and unloved in a relationship, please ask yourself why you’re settling for this? This relationship is not what you need, nor deserve. You’re better off alone than in a relationship that makes you feel alone. Stop accepting the scraps that are given, and demand a love that fits your wants, needs and standards. Break up.
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The only reason men claim to b poly is because they r never going to b faithful ! Tell him to get lost ! You and your child do not need a toxic selfish person in your lives. Get yourself better for the sake of your child who relies on you ! He’s NO good !
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Just leave him. If you’re not poly too or not prepared to be its not a good fit. He isn’t caring or prioritizing you.
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You both need to be poly for this to work.
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Guys it’s not about her being poly it’s just simply not a good time to add anyone because he doesn’t care for her as it is now so how do you think it’ll go if you throw someone else in? It won’t go good because she’s already feeling like she not being cared for right now and he not helping her through the process. It’s NOT all about adding more people theres alot more that goes with being poly and he’s not doing it right.
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Polly life isn’t for you. You cannot change him. Move on before you get hurt.
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He’s a cheater.
Plain and simple.
Cheater.
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Didn’t have to mentioned his background 
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Pretty sure poly relationships only work if both people are poly lol
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Are you poly or monogamous? Start there. If you do not know yourself then you cannot be fully with someone else 
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Sounds like your happiness is more important… let him go, he’s gonna continue hurting u
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This poly shit is stupid. Leave his ass. That’s all just stupid and toxic. If you love someone u don’t want no one else. You love more than one person you’re just stuck and attached.
Poly is no good. You can have sex with a ton of partners, but not a real relationship.
I have a few poly friends and family. Poly doesnt work if it’s not something BOTH sides are 100% in agreement with. He’s not doing anything wrong, but if it’s not something you want, leave.
I would tell him you are not mentally stable at the moment to respectfully be around the lifestyle but you do not want to hinder his wants.
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In any relationship you need open and honest communication…I feel like more so when it’s a poly relationship.
You knew he was poly…if you aren’t comfortable with it or aren’t comfortable about any part of it talk to him…but honestly if you aren’t okay with his lifestyle then move on.
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You know what you need to do, everyone here says Dump him…your life is as important as his. Live your life not his
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You knew he was polly, and he respects you enough to discuss new women. Because he was upfront from the beginning I don’t think it is fair to him at all that you feel betrayed. HOWEVER, your feelings are still valid and it sounds like you aren’t fully into this polly thing… probably time to walk away and find a one woman man. Best of luck.
He can’t and won’t give you the kind of relationship that you need. Get rid of him and find someone who can.
If he wanted a poly relationship that should have been talked about with you before you got with him. If your not comfortable with that type of thing tell him no and if he wants that he needs to find someone else to do it with. He’s clearly not giving the one girlfriend he has enough attention he’s gonna do awful with 2.
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If he lied it’s cheating, not poly… A liar is a liar. Once he breaks that trust, expect to question everything in your mind he says and does… If you aren’t involved beginning to end, again, that’s not poly, it’s cheating… The question is, are YOU poly? If not, sounds like this relationship isn’t for you
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You can’t get him to understand. Poly is not for everyone.
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Walk away and heal yourself. He is lying.
You can’t make him understand your point of view. He’s chosen to be poly and seems like it’s not the life for you. You will not change his mind. My opinion , move on to someone who wants a one on one relationship with you and can focus their time and attention on just you and not several others
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You entered into it knowing he is poly it isn’t fair to make him give it up . I can tell by your at least he told me comment you don’t really understand what polyamory is! He’s supposed to tell you ! That’s what it is ! Everyone knows about everyone
If you’re not for the poly life then it’s time you break it off honestly. It’s stressful at times. You either ok with it or you’re not and either way is fine. The reason I say break it off if you’re not for that lifestyle is because it will bring you down it will cause you to have self esteem issues etc. don’t stay just because you love him or because he claims your child as his you gotta do what’s best for your mental health and you said you’re not mentally stable for this lifestyle so it’s time to leave it before it knocks you down completely
Kick him to the curb!!!
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You obviously aren’t poly, or able to be in a poly relationship. Leave him be. Both of you will be unhappy if this keeps on going on. You should get a regular guy that’s within your expectations and comfort. He lives freely and really won’t care enough to change his whole lifestyle for you especially if you accepted him with those terms. I am Monogamous as I can’t share what’s mine and I specified that to my partner before we proceeded.
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He is just being selfish at this point. He’s using being poly as an excuse to ignore you and cheat on you. He’s just being a player and using you as his back up sure deal when he’s out of fresh meat. Dump his sorry butt.
My wife and I are both poly she has a boyfriend and I’m 100% cool with that the biggest thing when it comes to poly is an open and honest Communication even if you are not poly and he is tou don’t have to date anyone else
Move on! Your heart nor head is in it anymore. Good Luck!
Like to me that’s not poly. That’s cheating. And I come from a background of being poly. You never go ahead with out permission and then tell someone. That’s shady af.
You need to take your kid and leave the relationship. He is lying. Believe the other woman, they are already seeing each other and he is just now telling you. Also if you’re not comfortable sharing and he is poly then there’s no changing him. He isn’t gonna stop seeing other women for you…
Cut your losses and walk away
If you are poly…explain its not the right time to add someone to the relationship and if he can’t respect that request…he’s selfish and you need to rethink the relationship. If your NOT poly …he’s cheating and you need to leave that relationship.
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K not poly behavior tho. Lying? Going on ahead with someone. Not responding to your emotional well-being. This is not poly this is a guy who wants to f around with no responsibility while keeping you on a hook.
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Cheating and nope poly nope 
girl…please…find yourself a guy who wants you and only you
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It looks like a lot of people here have already hit the nail on the head. If he is poly, and you knew that from the get go, then he hasn’t done anything wrong here. What YOU need to do is figure out whether or not YOU can handle being with someone who is poly, whether you yourself are poly or not. If not, then it’s best for BOTH of you to cut ties. Poly relationships are hard. They take copious amounts of communication, trust, and managing your feelings. If you are not up to that, then you shouldn’t be with a poly person.
You have to figure out what YOU want and need from a relationship and get fussy about it. Set boundaries and standards for you and only accept a partnership with someone who shares similar values wants needs desires goals. You will never ever ever have a happy relationship if you want completely different things. Do not expect someone to change for you. Find someone you are happy with as they are now
It doesn’t sound like this is the kind of relationship for you.
Poly isn’t everyone’s cup of tea. BOTH of you need to sit down and talk. if you don’t understand his point of view or vice versa you need to end this relationship
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Poly is not good when children are involved and of course . It’s best to find someone else you deserve better. Poly usually involves number loyalty to the partner with exception of sleeping with others . If you are poly you gotta be clear with the externals that they are only there for fun not relationship.
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NO WAY!!!
and espically if you have a child as well
See ya:wave:
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