Why would you Want to Spend Time With or Marry a Rude, Inconsiderate, Disrespectful, Only Cares about Himself Miserable Person. He Doesn’t Care About you or Family. Get out of This Fake Relationship and Make Yourself Happy. He Never will. If He Doesn’t Love Himself he Can’t Love You. You’ve Already wasted 7 Years. Let him be Miserable by Himself 
Leave now. Your 1st responsibility is to your child. He obviously wants nothing to do with you or the kids (yours and his) all you are doing by staying is enabling him and making yourself miserable. He’s not going to change.
You shouldn’t allow him to treat you that way. You deserve better. It is time for you to walk away from him. You can find someone better.
This person will suck the life blood out of you. You can’t fix anyone. They have to want to change. It is not good for your child to be exposed to his toxic behaviour. Leaving a relationship is hard but life will be better for both you and your child.
And why are you staying with him and having to even ask? Use your head and get away from him. Do what you have to do but just do it. Be the strong woman you need to be.
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You need to walk away now, this man will never change! You think about your children first, a wonderful man will come along that will cherish you! I have been in your shoes & I waited 10 years & just celebrated 40 years with him! Miracles are out there! Wait:ok_hand:
Get out as soon as possible.He will never change.You will wake up one day and you will be too old to have a life.Get out put God first get those kids in a good church.God will put a good person in your life or put you confidence in your self .This is what happens to women they think they have to have a man to complete them.That is not true.You only put trust in your self and God take care of your children.They come first. HOOE YOU STILL HAVE FAITH IN YOUR SELF.
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your worth so much more. God did not bring you this far to be treated this way. Take control of your life… your children are watching.
Stop giving him chances and start giving him regrets. Leave. You deserve so much better than that and so does your daughter.
It’s better be on your own than put up with a man like that.
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If you aren’t happy in a relationship its time to move on.
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No don’t stay with anyone who treats you that way!!! You deserve better!!
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The biggest thing is if your not happy run while you have a chance!!
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I think you already answered your own question. Why would you want to marry someone like that. Especially if you just got your divorce finalized. Why go into another marriage? Hes not going to change.
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I would rather be alone. Also your Children need positive not negative adults to show them the path
Dump the sob, he only wants a live in baby sitter. He doesn’t love you or his own kids. Things will only get worse. Don’t walk away RUN like a bear is behind you.
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The last sentence states that “you don’t know if you want to spend the rest of your life with someone like that”. There’s her answer. It’s not going to get any better. It seems like this fiancé (guy) might have some underlined issues that have never been addressed.
RUN, there’s no respect. Seriously, if you are not sure then he’s not the one. The way he treats you is how your children will learn to treat others.
Like yourself, let him figure out his own place in your world. This borders on abuse if you haven’t realized it. I don’t know how old you are but this I know from experience living a life like this tension and stress and disappointment will cause you more physical and emotional problems down the road
He’s just using you to take care of his kids so he doesn’t have to. You need to take care of you and your daughter. Break that cycle mama before it starts. You both deserve the world
If he was like this at the start why carry on with it ? You’ve not got kids together and you say he doesn’t join in so no point being in something your unhappy and think of your daughter in this she deserves to see mum happy so cut ties n keep walking
Run away, fast, don’t walk. Chances are that he will only get worse. Been there, done that…never again. Without a “Come to Jesus experienc”, he WILL only get less respectful & meaner.
Dump him who needs the grief he gives you and if doesn’t want to do family thing, seems to me you have no future with him, dump and fast!
If after 7year your unsure don’t get married. If you think you love him Tri relationship counseling. If he doesn’t want that or it doesn’t work. Then it’s time to move on
OK, buttercup, move on! This guy will not bring you happiness in the long run. Sounds like a very selfish person. You need to find someone who doesn’t need fixing, because he sure doesn’t sound like a keeper.
We are hearing your side of story. There are always two sides. Sorry but sounds like both of you need to mature. If you are perfect don’t argue but rather make a plan to move out. If you need improvement work on it that way you know it isn’t your fault. You gave every effort. Mature people know what they want in life and also know their short comings. Mature people choose happiness and no drama
If you are having doubts now then do not marry him. Don’t even keep living with him.
You deserve better and if you don’t believe that then think of you child’s welfare.
Probably not your a good person and should be treated better my wife and I arnt perfect but we try to do things together which is what couples should do I’ve made mistakes in the past but I try my best not to now
I feel if you are sitting there debating to stay or go you should already be gone. Find someone who will make you happy and be a good role model for the kids
After 7 years, has be gotten any better?, cause they only get worse, grumpy, rude old men don’t suddenly become happy to lucky guys that love to be with children. You know what’s best.
Break up with this A$$ hole. He’s sending mix messages, and issue is you don’t need this. How is this sending message to your kids as well. As long as you are staying in this relationship it is telling me that you’re not putting your own children ahead of their needs as well. Think of what your ex husband will find out as well give him more right of taking your kids away from you.
you dont have to spend the rest of your life with him, and be treated bad. the choice is yours
Why would you want to stay with this person that never wants to do anything with you and your kids. Dump him your worth more than that.
It seems all his actions are saying that he doesn’t want to be around you. It seems like something is just convenient for him. My personal opinion and I’m old and I’ve been there and it’s hard as hell. But why are you
staying if he doesn’t want to do anything with you. you can live and be by yourself and do whatever you want and not have to stress about why he doesn’t want to be with you just go and be happy and let him figure out he lost something that maybe you should have fought for. Go run fast BE HAPPY!!!
Run! Get your money in order, apply for assistance if you need and qualify for. Locate your own apartment unless this is yours, then make him leave. Get everything all ready before you go. Make sure you have some things ahead. Buy some grocery gift cards, get things for the kids ahead a little and get child care lined up so you can keep working with no issues. Make sure you have your own bank account if you don’t already and be sure he doesn’t have access to your $. Then everyday starting tomorrow, high five yourself in the mirror, you got this!!
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What is wrong with you??? You just officially ended what I assume was a bad marriage, and now you’re jumping into what will be another bad marriage!! Like I said……What is wrong with you??? Open your eyes!!! And get out of this relationship……run out as fast as you can!!!
Read back to yourself what you’ve just written. It’s pretty self explatory. There is no relationship there to worry about so move on.
Get over it and move on there’s plenty of guys that will treat you better.
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You are a live in baby setter bring money in the house and you are his friend with benefits when he wants.take yourself and get your own place and then you can complain about your self.run don’t walk
Girl leave! I was in a relationship like that and one day I just packed my shit , grabbed my 6 month old and moved back to my moms until I found something more permanent. I never realized how much life he sucked outta me until I was gone. I am 10000 times happier and he is still just as miserable 4 years later
You don’t need that negativity in your life. It sounds like you are fed up with it and just need the support to make the right decision. You are worth better.
Run…… don’t walk. Not good for you or your child. You need the attitude that you are enough and you are fine alone, if the right man comes along ……great, if not you are fine. DO NOT SETTLE FOR LESS
Life is so short. I’d rather be alone with my child and miserable, than be with someone like him and miserable
Well I certainly know what I would!! Get the heck out of there.What are you waiting for??? Think of your child who certainly doesnt need to live in this situation!!
It’s starting out bad, how do you think it gonna end up? Put your jogging shoes on and run. If he haven’t changed in 7 years he’s not about to. He don’t reaches out for his children do you think he gonna reach out for yours.
RUN!!!
It’s way past time to leave him. You don’t deserve that kind of treatment neither does your child. Move on to greener pastures
You are UNMARRIED? You just got your divorce final? LIVE WITH BEING FREE FOR AT LEAST 2 YEARS! … Honey there are more Pleasant and Giving fish in the sea… start fishing and enjoy time with your daughter bonding!
Leave. Unfortunately he’s lost interest. You deserve better. As a man trust and believe our actions speak volumes, hun stop hurting yourself and move on, you’ll thank yourself when someone appreciates your worth. Wish ya the best.
Get out NOW!!! If not for you for your daughter. He is abusive to both of you.She live in that environment and it will effect her the rest of her life.
Drop him pronto…things will only worsen…heaven help the woman who aligns herself with this Neanderthal!
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Life is too short to be treated like that and you can do bad all by yourself! Tell him to kick rocks!
He is not going to change. 7 years all he wants is a babysitter and his time. Open your eyes girl cut your losses and go on. You are better then that.
Seriously you need advice what to do ???
Have respect for yourself
Do you want your child to grow up in this environment!??
He’s done this before, people don’t change. (I don’t give second chances).
He don’t want to do anything as a family unit, would you really want him as a father to another child that he’s not involved with ?
SOOOO many more reasons.
Run, an run fast !!!
Please move on you are bigger and better than that use your common sense because if you marry Him you will be getting a second divorce learn from your mistakes and move on 
divorcing
Why do you put up with this crap? I would be gone and nit seen for the dust. You want to be in the same place in 10 years? Life is short and much better than what you are living! Get out if you are smart!
Don’t ask people on Facebook why he is a jerk. Ask yourself why your self esteem is so low that you tolerate this. You can’t fix other people. You can fix yourself. If you continue to tolerate this cold, callous and unloving treatment, you will get more of that and then some. Get into counseling, not social media. Learn to respect yourself and have the courage and strength to leave disrespectful boyfriends. Stop giving boyfriends husband priveledges and stop reproducing with him. Your children will see this poor treatment and think that’s the way it should be. You are doing yourself and your child a disservice to live that way. True love is not rude. It is patient and kind. Learn to recognize what love is and is not. Then teach that to your child. I wish you the best and I don’t mean to be harsh but I hope this is an eye opener.
you will have that attitude rest of your life. life is to short for someone that mean and sooo selfish
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It’s his choice, he changes or you leave, it’s not an ultimatum, he is not forced into anything. Go for what is right and for your and your children’s well being. All of you deserve better, whether he wants to be a part of it or not.
If you have to ask that question you already know the answer to it if you value yourself you know exactly what to do and seven years is a long time to be with somebody that is rude
There are better fish in the ocean why are you wasting your life with someone like that don’t you think you deserve better
It sounds that something he is getting from you that he is never going to give back…He is not capable , you need to go now.
How you mean you don’t know…are you really considering staying with this guy?..have you lost your mind?..lady we the public can’t help you, you need to look at your situation and make up your own mind…kmt…
Sweetheart, you ANSWERED your question in your last sentence - What I’m getting at is I don’t know if I want to spend the rest of my life with someone like that. Go for it lady, leave him and move on with your life. God bless you.
Should you spend your life with someone like that?
No.
He’s had this problem before, he is now, and he always will. This is clearly WHO HE IS, not just what he does sometimes.
Cut your losses. It hurts at first, but keep your distance and boundaries long enough, and do something achievement-based for yourself (like school, classes, fitness, new learning experience, whatever) and you will start to see how much more free, strong, & capable you feel outside him.
It sounds like you enjoy activities with your kid(s). If he doesn’t, he’ll just end up holding you back from giving them a good life, which he clearly doesn’t care about you or your kid(s) enough to give to you.
There’s better out there. Even being alone & not needing to answer to someone like him is better & more empowering than you realize right now, until you’re out of it for awhile.
I say all this from experience.
P.s. now am married to the most amazing man ever, after enough years alone to really get to know myself, first. Never thought I’d meet someone, let alone get married, and had gotten to the point where I was really ok with that. Then, boom!! Not looking for anything, and found everything.
Get out while the gettings good. You don’t need a man like that. My husband was a drinker every night before we got married. When he asked the big question I told him he’d have to quiet I would not raise my children like that. He did best thing that ever happen to me. He did drink every now and then but nothing like he did before we got married. And we both had children before we meet.
Get rid of him, you deserve better, why would someone stay with someone like this is beyound, you do not need anyone advice , do not let him put you down, it is abusive and get out of there.
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Don’t know why your asking for advice, you’ve said he doesn’t want to be seen with you nor be a part of things in the family… 7 years means you don’t want to leave. So deal with it
Past time to get out. He sounds uncaring and selfish. Do you really want to raise your child with someone like that??
Nope, I’d leave & im feeling he wouldn’t care anyway. Someone else is out there 4 you.
He is selfish and self centered? Let me ask you this. When you talk to him about something he has done that bothers you or hurt you does he immediately turn it around on you? Does he half heartedly apologize for something. If he does it sounds like a narcissist you have on your hands. My suggestion would be too look up quora on google or fb and look for definitions of narcissism. If your boyfriend has or does any of the things described run away immediately and never ever ever look back. I wish you luck and I pray you understand that he will never change. And you do not deserve that kind of treatment.
Leave my ex was like this he wasn’t when we first married then changed bad nothing to do with family
You change anyone. It’s time for you to realize you and your children deserve better. Move on.
I honestly believe it’s times to go, once you get married things will only get worse.
Don’t know why you think this person is worth putting up with. There is no respect, compassion and I don’t feel the love. Don’t go from. One bad marriage to another. Don’t let him treat you that way. Get your kid and leave. Your child has already seen how he treats you. It is unacceptable the way you two communicate. Chalk the 7 years up to lesson learned or you’ll be in the same situation with divorcing him. Keep your dignity girl , walk with your head high. He’s not worth it.
Get out while you can. You dont seem happy a relationship has to be 50/50 its seems your puttin all the effort and not gettin it back .
Save yourself the heartache and move on. Didn’t change before isn’t going to change after.
I don’t mean to be rude but 1) you can’t change someone & you obviously don’t like him 2) It will not get better after you get married or have a child with him. As much as it hurts I would run away as fast as you can. That is mental abuse & hurts as much as physical abuse. I’ve been there & it wasn’t easy to leave because they know how to manipulate you & control you. Maybe the 1st step for you would be to find a good counselor to talk thru it. A counselor made me see I don’t deserve to be treated like that not even once. I pray you find the strength to get out.
Think about what your child is learning from this. He could grow up thinking this behavior is OK and is mean and rude to his partner.
Run as fast as you can. Too many flags. Take your daughter and get out of that environment
No you don’t want to spend any time with someone like that. Obviously you’re not important to him.
don’t put yourself or your child in a position to be emotionally abused for the rest of your life. You can do better, move on. it took me 12 years to figure out I did.
I’d rather leave on my terms that to stay and be somebody’s BETTER THAN NOTHING…
Move on, the right one is out there. Do not settle for less, you deserve better than what he is giving. Run don’t walk, run like hell now.
Then don’t. Walk away. He doesn’t respect you at all. Start again without him
Actions speak a Thousands of words.
Time To worry about your self & your own children.
He obviously dont show no intrest in you or yours
7 yrs into a relationship to someone self-centered and rude, is too long, his children are going to have to deal with it, but, you and your child do not, the relationship is demeaning and unappreciative and you have every right to ask advise, move on Mom, you can do better for yourself, make sure you have a place rented/or purchased suitable for you and your child, it takes much private planning and strength. God be with you and bless this transition period.
Life is too short to spend it miserable. The only person you can change is yourself. So, either accept the behavior or leave.
You don’t really need an answer to that. Either let that charmer go or get him to seek help.
You’re not his girlfriend, you are his hostage. He does what he does because he can. Stop letting him do it. How? There are two things you can do: (1) tell him his behaviour is unacceptable, (2) tell him if things don’t get better he will have to leave. Why would anyone want to even question the fact about living with him forever when you’re not even living with him now. Think about what you really want & make it happen. I would rather spend the rest of my life alone than spend even five minutes with someone who treats me awful. Please think about things.
Wow. Seven years. Start packing…his or your things. Go and don’t look back. Your child deserved better and it starts with YOU
He sounds like a self centered man. Think long and hard, is this the way you want to spend the rest of your life, and your daughter. He will only change one long enough to appease you. Temporary fix. You and your daughter deserve to have happiness in your life. The ball is in your court.
Get out you are worth more than that.always you come first, some men are not worth a hill of beans. You will find someone else.
I honestly don’t think he’s worth it if he can’t give it is all then probably never will if he as to ask you to call him out and things your crazy then he’s the one with issues not you
Ummmm. You just go your own way… that simple. It’s child abuse too…period.
No way! Life is too short and family is precious. There is someone else out there.
Read the writing on the wall woman he’s already showed you what kind of person he is that what you want for the rest of your life
Time to take flight he will never change and u will feel this way forever and your daughter will grow up thinking that’s the way love should be
It’s men on my opinion…mines not rude,but is self involved.He doesn’t really want to do things.Prefers quiet alone time.In his defense he does work 90 hours a week.He iscalm gently but mostly a loner.I have the family 99.9 % of the time We have teens.We do spend Sundays together means him but he prefers to be alone.
You are not dependent on him. He will change, for the worse because you allow it by putting up with his bad behaviour. This is not good for your child. Why waste your life with someone who clearly does not love you? Better to be alone and free to meet a real man. Not a bully.
Do yourself a favor and set out on your own! Sounds like your just the babysitter, cook and housekeeper!