Just tell him you guys will put a little on his plate. Maybe he will want to try at some point. But you aren’t force feeding him.
Sooo it’s just conflicting parenting styles. I mean if your kids call him dad, well then why don’t you respect that he’s trying to parent how he thinks is best just like you do. You guys need to meet in the middle somewhere
I mean, why not shove something down your boyfriends throat he doesn’t like to eat and see how he feels
It’s astounding how many people are saying they are YOUR children. When you have children, you shouldn’t be living with someone that you aren’t going to marry or have a lifelong commitment with. Children don’t need a new daddy every couple of years. If you are going to let your kids call him daddy then you need to let him act like the daddy. That being said, you guys need to sit down together without the children and discuss all the rules. What is 100% set in stone, what has a little give(including what the give is), and what is 100% ok. You need to discuss the punishment style.
Force feeding is wrong! If he has tried it and doesnt like it. There are plenty of other ways to provide protein. ESPECIALLY if he thinks it’s sad it’s an animal. He has opinions and they should be respected. What are you teaching him if his boundaries and wishes cant be respected? I would privately talk to your boyfriend that you wont be forcing him.
You child has the right to say no. And if hes telling you why he doesn’t want it. He obviously understands reasoning. Now if it was I just dont want it or he was demanding something else to eat thatd be a different story. I do not force my kids to eat what they do not like nor will I force them to eat in general
When I was a kid I was to eat whatever was put in front of me or not at all.
That’s not child abuse. Food is being provided, if a kid gets hungry enough they’ll eat what is cooked.
Good lord what are we going to do in ten years?
Apparently making your child eat what the rest of the family is eating is child abuse now.
How long have you guys been dating? Is it serious and you all live together? Maybe they shouldn’t be calling him dad just yet if you guys are not on same page about even feeding the children yet. Kids need to see parents listen to eachother and compromise. Id be more worried about that than the meat thing. If your serious about being a blended family you will work it out!
I think you should stick to your guns and parent your child how you see fit. I wouldn’t be forcing my child to eat anything especially if it made them sad to eat it.
Maybe look at your boyfriends relationship with your children. If he supports them financially and emotionally, then he probably feels entitled to an opinion. If that’s how he would choose to parent his own biological children is he the kind of person you would like to parent your own children with?
I don’t agree with either one of you, I don’t feel you should force a child to eat something they don’t like but not feeding them isn’t right either.
who’s the mother and parent and who is not put your foot down tell him you will raise your children as you see fit that if you need to discuss anything about your children with him you will but he needs to remember they are your children and I would not move this man in
My daughter refused to eat most breakfast foods from the get go. She never liked eggs or bacon, grits, hash browns and a few other things. We tried to ‘make’ her eat it. That never worked. We weren’t willing to beat her to make her eat it, obviously, but nothing else worked, at all. No threats or withholding her favorite things or standing in the corner, or time out, or refusing to give her other food until she at least ate a part of it…NOTHING. She was adamant and would rather not eat anything if she had to eat that. She was very strong willed. We finally gave up the battle. To this day, she’s now 15, she still hates breakfast food. Biscuits too.
You can’t make them do it unless you plan on beating them and of course that’s not ok. Some kids are very strong willed. If your child decides to in her own time, so be it. I think your boyfriend is wrong. If she’s happy eating other foods besides meat and she takes her vitamins/and/or is getting other nutrients, he needs to back off IMO.
Lol man y’all are being hard on this dude. If you read she said he came to her with these thoughts. He doesn’t make him eat it or “force it down” kids throat. Maybe he is old school. My parents were like that. The Eat what your given and be grateful there are starving children! Rant… Some of you are acting like hes beating them or something. Lol
I went vegetarian at 7 and you couldn’t get me to budge for the same reason. Kept that until I was 18 before I incorporated poultry into my diet. I wouldn’t force it, and I don’t think it’s something that needs to be argued about. I’m sure there is something your boyfriend doesn’t like - how about he get force fed it just because it’s on the table? The little human has feelings and opinions, your support has alot of weight right now.
I would never force him to eat something he Don’t like or want. So wrong.
First of all, you are extremely blessed to have a young child that knows eating dead animals is bad all the way around…
Tell your boyfriend your kids, you will parent how you want…
Maybe now all of you will see the light and QUIT EATING DEAD ANIMALS…
So much better for your health and the environment
My SO doesn’t have kids, I disregard advice and the such from people who are childless
Have BF read up on the benefits of vegetarianism. It’s better for health and the environment, not to mention the animal cruelty. And without meat, your garbage & your poop will stink less! By eating our factory-farmed meats you are ingesting pesticides, antibiotics and growth hormones, and possibly salmonella, listeria or E-coli. Most doctors recommend eating a plant based diet. Just be sure he gets all his nutrients & protein through eggs, dairy, tofu, beans, etc.
What a compassionate & thoughtful little guy! And what’s with your BFs meat mandate? What evil does he think will happen if y’all don’t eat meat? I think you should all be vegetarian & let BF buy & cook his own meat.
Wait one minute…so your opinion is …sure he dont have to eat it…but he dont get anything else? Absolutely ridiculous! Your making the child suffer and go hungry!
Shame on both of you.
So if you dont like something …do you go hungry…or do you get something you do like? You get something you do like!!
You are making your child go without because he isnt comfortable eating meat!!
If your kid eat everything else except the meat I’ll take that as a win. Especially since he have a reason besides “I dont like it”. As far a the boy friend I dont know how long hes been in your kids life, but they are your kids. Bitchin about not eating chicken… he needs to pick his battles.
I think your kids reasoning on WHY he doesn’t want to eat meat should be first and foremost respected. My parents didn’t make me anything else or anything special, but I was allowed to eat sides that didn’t contain meat growing up. But if I said I didn’t “like” something they’d still make me try it. But an animal was different. My son found out what chicken is and refuses to eat it and that’s ok. You can get protein nearly anywhere else through the day is how I feel, he’ll be fine.
I’d have a major sit down with your boyfriend. I understand where he’s coming from, a lot of people in general are very much so “eat what I make and that’s that” and if that works, cool. But he also needs to respect your parenting choices and your kids wishes.
You make the decisions. It’s your kid. And I agree with you on what you’ve decided with your 4 year old
Tell your boyfriend that that’s not the kind of parents you want your kids to have.
Side note: there are tons and tons of alternatives to meat. Find those for your son and there shouldn’t be a problem
We need more details, sis. Does he live with you? How long yall been together? Is he allowed to discipline the kids? Does he support them financially? If he took the role as dad…then let him dad. Your kid is 4. Hide the meat in the things you cook. But definitely do not let this man be dad if he’s not allowed to “dad” in all aspects.
I say you stick to your guns. They are YOUR kids and while he has Stepped up tremendously he doesn’t get the final say.
I agree with you regarding your choice not to force the kid to eat meat.
My daughter has always been on the petite side so I make her what she likes unless we’re having spaghetti or something like that. She doesn’t eat meat except chicken nuggets even if u hide meat she’ll sort it out in her mouth and spit it out. I don’t force her to eat we just have it to where she picks from the options I give her and if she finishes she can have a bedtime snack but if she doesn’t then no snacks. But I’ll give her a breakfast shake after dinner to drink just so shes not hungry going to bed.
I was made to eat stuff I didn’t like & now I eat real fast cause that’s what I did when I was young. I’m overweight
Dont force your kid to eat meat if they dont want too.my 8 year dont eat meat
I mean I agree with you except if that’s his choice and your going to support it you need to make him something that will make up for the lack of meat in his diet. Idk what all that is but I’ve heard of things like beans and rice or tofu. That is simply for his health.
First of all, your boyfriend does not get to make ANY decisions that have to do with your children. Second, I wouldn’t let ANYONE force my child to eat something that they didn’t like. You need to put that boyfriend in his place. Just saying.
What food does your boyfriend despise ? Make that for supper all week and tell him.he has to eat all of it every day and the we will discuss forcing the child to eat meat.
Could get vegan meat and not tell your boyfriend and make that for your 4 yr old
If your child doesn’t want to eat meat then they shouldn’t have to.
There are plenty of alternatives to the protein and fat that they wouldn’t feel bad about.
Your boy friend. Is sounding like a controller you never force a child to eat anything they know what they like at a very early age with mine i. Told them o wanted them to taste something once if they didnt like it that was ok its never right to force anyone to eat some thing they dont eant
Forcing your child to eat something they’ve clearly expressed they don’t like is not ok.
This is why I love the dynamic I have with my husband and my kids.
My older two aren’t his. In pretty much every aspect, he treats them like his but we agreed he would leave the discipline and similar decisions to me.
He comes to me with suggestions and concerns and I ask his opinions and ideas and we usually agree,but ultimately it’s my final decision.
It is imperative that you discuss parenting styles and discipline before you get into a relationship.
You should tell your bf you appreciate his input but this is something you’re not going to force your kid to do.
I’d say if he’s called dad it’s his role. If your kids respect and love him and he’s doing his part to fill that roll why wouldn’t he have a say?
I was/am a picky eater. I would have to sit at the table until I ate and most times I didn’t eat I would rather go to bed hungry lol point of that is you can’t force a child unless you physically shove food down his throat but I’m pretty sure that’s child abuse ! And yes he’s a child but he is still a person so maybe he should treat him like one.
You should probably sneak meat into his diet somehow. How else is he getting protien or other nutrients that meat has if hes missing that food group?
If my children dont want to eat something and even if it is the father i would still not allow him to force the child to eat it
So you allow a man to be called DADDY by kidS from other relationshipS yet he can’t discipline “YOUR” kids ? Let me guess his money supports these kids though right ? In my home you eat what is fed or you starve so I can see his aspect but that’s not how you communicate because now y’all don’t agree it’s YOURS now lol so that means he should not have the title daddy nor be buying them crap or supporting them. Take it all or take none.
I stopped at boyfriend…wth
My 7 year old does not eat meat and has never liked eating meat… I am the same way.
I don’t force my kids to eat what they don’t like. I was as a child and it proved absolutely no point at all… the things I was MADE to eat as a child… Are things I DO NOT eat now don’t let anyone change your mind on what you feel is right
Being forced to eat meat as a kid was troubling for me…
Tell your bf to mind his business.
If he doesn’t like meat he just doesn’t. Everyone is different and do not always like the same things. That’s what makes him his own self.
My daughter is 12 and the only meat I have been able to get her to eat ever is chicken nuggets n hot dogs. He don’t want to eat meat don’t force him.
Would you like to be forced to eat something that you don’t wabt or like? If your answer is NO. Then why would you allow that for YOUR son. Lol. Not being mean but honest!
Kids aren’t gonna eat something if they dont want to. My 2 y.o. hardly eats meat but that’s cuz it’s a texture thing right now. I still put it on her plate. If she eats it, awesome. If not, no big deal, there’s plenty of other food on her plate to eat. You should never FORCE a kid to eat anything
That’s borderline abuse. If he doesn’t want to eat meat, supplement with other nutrients. Some kids and people just don’t like it. I would let boyfriend know it’s nonnegotiable and he does not have to eat meat. Yes he is a child but he is a person too. And should be learning how to make basic decisions for himself within reason. This is a big one he should be able to make. Same if he didnt want milk.
Beyond has a couple things hamburger patties and crumble for spaghetti.
Morning star farm has tons. From breakfast items to chicken (tofu) nuggets etc … all in the frozen department
Its not worth making your child have a eating disorder.
If he doesn’t want to eat meat there is no reason to force the issue as long as he is getting protein from somewhere.
Boyfriend needs to realize that you dont have to be a dictator to be a good parent. Kids are just tiny people who have likes and dislikes just like the rest of us. There is never any good reason to force a child to eat something they hate.
As an adult, I sure dont est things I dislike.
If boyfriend lives with you and kids call him dad the two of you need to sit down and come to a mutual agreement on the rules and those are the rules that should be enforced.
I’m a lover of meat. And ita benefits, please dont need any backlash from vegans, etc…you do you…I’ll do me…but if your child is making a concious decision like that. Respect it. Having a child know that his or her opinions matter at a young age is very important. Like someone above said. Do vegan meat. Just keep an eye that the guy doesnt say it is when it really isnt if he cooks. And make sure the kid is still getting all the necessary vitamins and such.
The LOVELY un popular opinion, here it goes. Everyone is saying ITS YOUR KID well with that said if you didn’t want your BF to be their father figure an handle father figure situation such as discipline then then YOU SHOULD NOT have them calling him dad. An in my opinion kids SHOULD NOT be able to make those decisions for two reasons. One regardless of what anyone vegan,. vegetarian or whatever say it is not healthy to only eat plants an junk food. What I would do is explain to your child that meat is good for you an yes it is an animal but that is the circle of life. People eat animals animals eat animals hell plant sometimes gain from animals. (Dead animal in the woods, rots and turns into fertilizer).
My kids go thru that and I have to be honest me too… I’m not a vegan or anything but sometimes me & some of my kids could live off noodles, potatoes, fruits & veggies… I just like that they eat… my daughter went thru a phase she ate nothing but pb&j and yogurt for a while lol they are kids yes but they also get to like and dislike things lol I fed all my kids broccoli as babies…only 1 out of 4 kids will eat it to this day
Eww.
Sounds like a controlling abuser,
My son had a feeding therapist for other reasons but she said you never force a child to eat. It creates more food aversions than the original one along with anxiety that could affect how they eat for a very long time. You can offer it but never force, cajole or shame. There are plenty of alternatives that provide protein. Greek yogurt (1/2c has more protein than 2 eggs - sweeten it with Stevia for no added calories that won’t spike blood sugar), eggs, beans, etc.
I would never force my child to eat meat if he’s making a choice like that and has empathy for the animals. My 11 year old is a vegetarian and my 7 year old is not. It would be exceptionally cruel in my opinion to do that to a child when mealtime should be a happy family activity. Tell you bf to stay in his lane.
Let me add too, if he has taken on role of dad, etc. Then awesome for him. Happy for you and your kids. His opinions should be taken into account too. But pick your battles. If a kid refuses to eat ANY vegetables, then yes, I would make him eat them. However this is a moral thing for him. And that should be respected despite age. I understand the problem, but he needs to realize parenting is a joint responsibility and decisions must be .ade together.
Your child may be a vegetarian or possibly a vegan. Your boyfriend may not agree but neither of you guys should force him to eat meat. There are alternative items that can replace protein so go with that. Theres even plantbased meat like items to make burgers or spaghetti etc. Maybe include once a week the food to the entire family. The childs not being disrespectful to your boyfriend so I don’t think he should be so upset. He should be the father they call him and try to support your children’s life choices. Support and love are two of the most important attributes parents can show their children. If he insists in trying to change him it outwardly looks like he’s bullying him into getting his way. It’s really a small gesture your child is passionate about it’s important to him. So celebrate him doing a good thing instead if trying to punish him.
We run a house of you eat what is served or you don’t eat BUT I also don’t intentionally make food that my kids HATE every night. I make baked ziti once every 2 weeks and one of my kids says he doesnt like it, well, he has to eat it but the 14 days between he has plenty of food that he loves.
A child completely being against meat is a whole new ball game. I would never force him to eat it. He has a legit concern for not wanting to eat it … find a meat substitute for him.
Girl those are YOUR kids! What you say goes! You can take in to consideration his suggestion but at the end of every conversation, he has to realize that he is not their father.
If the child does not want to eat meat because he feels sad for the animals why force him. I think he is a great little boy, he is so young to be so considerate. He deserves praise.
You said you’re dating this guy? How long have you been dating him? If you’re just “dating” him, he has no business telling your kids anything, and you have no business letting your kids call him dad. As far as what your kid will/will not eat, choose your battles carefully. Some are worth fighting. Some not. This would be a “not worth fighting” battle to me.
How stupid can you be? Second word says it all. Boyfriend. Get rid of him and you won’t be showing your ignorance on here.
I think your boyfriend sounds like a huge asshole. A child doesn’t get to make choices?
Why are they calling him dad? Where are their fathers? No child should be ‘forced’ to eat anything, just make sure he gets adequate nutrients from other sources. Boyfriend sounds a bit of a bully.
We very frequently forget that children are people too. Allowed to have feelings, thoughts and opinions.
If you told your boyfriend that you don’t want to eat meat any more, would he force you to sit at the table and down a hamburger? Probably not.
My child went through the exact same thing at that age. He felt bad for the animals. So we had a talk about what he WOULD eat. Eggs, milk and milk products need the animals to stay alive.
It’s not hard nor expensive to grab a package of meat alternative “chicken” nuggets or burger patties. Lots of things can be whipped up for just the one child without meat. And it’s a reason to try something new.
biological father or step father… i don’t think it matters, if a child doesn’t want to eat meat due to texture, not liking it in general or for not liking the fact that you have to kill an animal for it, don’t force it on them. his reasoning is super sympathetic and should be taken into consideration like anything else. the nutrients he gets from meat he can get from something else on his plate!
Leading a vegetarian diet is risky . but if you really wanna follow thru with it for the child . you need to speak to his ped. To help find the right vegetarian diet for a 4 year old so he isnt missing what his body needs . my almost 6 year old has an issue with texture ( she has sensory processing disorder) she can eat chicken ,pork and Turkey but beef is a struggle . so I have to work with that. As far as your boy friend .men dont get it. I mean my childrens father is the same way . its not that he doesn’t respect our kids. He just doesnt “get it” . ya know 🤦🤷 . he is just set in his way . y’all need to meet in the middle on food . educate him and change your sons diet and let your BF watch how your son eats after that. But if they’re calling him dad . That’s his roll . he deserves respect and he deserves to have his opinion heard also 🤷😕
I’d say stand up for your kid. It’s not just him being picky, it’s him actively choosing not to eat something based on his morals. Whether or not it’s a phase, it’s a decision that he made that doesn’t cause negative affects to his health so long as he gets protein from other foods.
If he was refusing to eat fruits or veggies it’d be different because that can cause a lot of health issues, but so long as he gets protein and plenty of veggies I see no problem.
Take him to McDonald get him hamburger see what happens ?
It could be a texture thing, my son is same way all his life he is 10, found out its cause of a sensory disorder. Plus ur bf sounds way too controlling, I’d be more concerned about his behavior. How you raise ur kids is between you and their father
Wow! He sounds like a intelligent little guy already! Meat does not have to be eaten to get protein. Peanut butter is always good and so are eggs, and he won’t go hungry. How to convince significant other? Some guys are more easily convinced than others. Hopefully you can all agree on an alternative.
I would never force my child to eat something they didn’t like let alone eat meat if it upset thwm , I think your partner needs to back off with this
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A decision with YOUR child is between you and that child’s father,
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Why are they calling your bf dad.
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He sounds controlling and is showing some huge red flags here. I’d definitely be worried about his behavior towards the children and yourself. Those are your children not his he doesn’t get a say so
No ones forcing my kids to do anything, end of.
My now 5 year old went through this… it passed… Same reason as his, Once she learned dinner meat was animals… It broke her heart and I came up with other healthy options until she just one day wanted her nuggets lol she is back to eating everything now.
Don’t force that baby to eat animals if he doesn’t want too… Veggies and other dinners are a different story but when you have such a fragile little mind who is heartbroken over it, Protect and Validate your little man’s feelings, No matter what.
I say its your child and you should raise them as you wish
Trying to force a kid to eat something is just going to make it even worse if the child dont like meat and dont want to eat it then he dont have to and the man is ur boyfriend not husband so I say until ur married he cant really control ur kids idk I used to get mad when my mom let her boyfriend try and control use and it made things worse we started fighting back and they left but its whatever we cant really tell u how to do things people have to figure it out them selves …
Doesn’t matter why they call him dad. But anyways. Kids have a right to not like food just as adults. 1 of my kids just started eating meat and she’s 12, she still doesn’t eat bread. If he doesn’t like it or want to eat it don’t force him. It’s not good mentally at all. It’s just food.
While it’s nice that you say he’s stepped up, he does sound a bit controlling. He can come to you with suggestions etc, but regardless of what is said, those kids are YOURS & if your little one doesn’t want to eat meat… then don’t make him, it may pass with time.
Stand up for your kid. He’s not being picky he simply doesn’t want to eat meat because it makes him sad there’s nothing wrong it that. Put your kid first, your job is to validate your child and help him grow up into a proper young man your man isn’t a child
Don’t force them to eat it. I hated eating some meats when I was little because my dad told me where it came from. Up until about a year ago I still didn’t eat any kind of pork lol. But now I love it!
Are you seriously telling me he doesn’t get anything else given to him if he won’t eat meat! That’s just mean there is lots of different options to feed him
It’s your child your say until y’all have been together for like 5 or more years. However I was never forced to eat my food and I’m a great eater
Texture issues. My child did like meat either until he was around 4 or 5, even then he only liked chicken and fish. It’s not pychologically healthy to force a child to eat something they don’t want. He will still be healthy with out meat.
There is protein in other foods.
It’s your child’s body, you don’t get to make decisions for him like that.
Let him learn to make decisions for himself, he is his own person.
Your bf should be just that your bf, not your childs father because he is not.
You mommy stand up for your child and his decisions and dislikes and let no human other than his father and u get a say.
Your bf needs to fuck off but saying he doesnt get anything else if he doesnt eat meat is shitty too
Its probably how he was raised but he doesn’t get to treat your kid like that. Its great that hes stepped up to be a dad to your kids but where is their dad? If hes out of the picture completely and you bf has been their all along then you certainly want to include him in parenting decisions. But your son is old enough to learn and decide with yalls help what he should or shouldn’t eat. I would stress that this is something you need to talk about between the 2 of you and DO NOT argue about it in front of the kids. Settle it once and for all and tell him that you understand where hes coming from but you absolutely will not force your child to eat meat and thats the end of it. If he doesn’t like it tell him that he is welcome to come to a dr apt with you and your child and bring it up to his dr. You cant have it both ways though. You cant make him think he is your kids father figure and then argue about parenting choices he wants to make. Those are boundries that shouldve been made more clear from the start. Personally i understand where youre coming from because i have 3 kids from a previous and 1 with my current and he has been the only father my now 6 year old has ever known as hes been in her life since she was 2 and stepped up slowly but completely. Even though she knows him as her dad he still knows that there are certain things that i have the final say in and he would never make my child eat meat if i said she didn’t have to eat it. You really need to let him know that he cant force any child his or not to eat a food they dont like without causing harm in the long run. Its Its likely a phase he will grow out of and as tge mother you really have to advocate for your childs freedom to Express themselves
It’s difficult, because you have allowed your kids to call this man dad, he now wants a say in how they are being raised, just as a real dad would/should. However, I dont think you should make your kid eat something they dont want to, if they have a genuine dislike for something. There are lots of alternatives. I’m sure your boyfriend doesn’t like every food on the planet, how would he like being forced to eat sprouts if he despises them! X
I remember being 13 and my mother shoving spoonfuls of clam chowder down my throat. It traumatized me. I’m 33 and still remember it vividly and would rather have someone slice my throat than eat a clam, legit. Don’t force your kid to eat something they don’t want, but don’t stop offering it either. My 7 year old decided a year ago she didn’t like mustard, she came around and eats it now. Gentle approach works wonders.
I don’t like to eat shit I don’t like - so i don’t, and will never, force my children to eat things they don’t like. Of course I have them try things for the first time, and maybe a little later in life if it’s been awhile (because taste buds change), but I don’t make them eat things they don’t enjoy.
My son wouldn’t eat meat until he was last the toddler years. I just tried to give him beans with everything, dairy, and lots of scrambled eggs. I worked on getting him to try different meats until eventually he did start eating it. Now the kid loves burgers
Your kids, your rules
Get vegan meat and don’t say nothing to the bf. Ur son will then eat it seeing it’s vegan, can’t force a child to eat something that he has no control of. The bf needs to understand that it’s ur child not his
It’s not like the kid is being picky and saying ew to everything he had a reason that you respect so research done alternative protien sources and let him be vegetarian.
Never force your kids to eat anything they don’t want. My nephew to this day has only eaten a chicken nugget once and he hates meat and we’re not going to force him to eat it that’s just wrong
No don’t force him to eat meat.thst
That’s just wrong.
Don’t know what to do? Leave his ass.
I’m confused if the child doesn’t eat the meat he doesn’t get anything else? Cause if that’s the case that’s way beyond wrong