My boyfriends ex has been keeping their kids from him: Advice?

Exactly ,if there is a court order than he can get her for contempt!!! May take a few times but sooner or later they will get her… keep records keep texted messages keep a log as much as possible with dates and times …it will only help him in the long run… just sucks for both him and his children that baby mommas have to be this way … makes no sense to hurt your own child this way

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What does this have to with nails?

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What does a judge say?

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Have him pay her through the courts…a set price…this will asure him that she gets her money and keeps him honest. Make sure you have paperwork that shows when he has rights to his daughters. The courts will be on both if not holding to the agreement.

Did you suggest court ? It’s the only option… not sure if anyone else suggested it :joy:

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Go to court…if they already have an order and she doesn’t let them come on his time for whatever reason he can file a show cause. Biggest thing I can say is keep a journal of everything!! Pick up and drop of times, where. Calls, conversations everything!! Even after court.

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The solution: The father must petition for his rights. The judge will set up a visitation schedule, the mother must comply with the schedule or will be held in contempt of the court order once you file her in contempt after she’s denied visitation once an order is in place.

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Document everything and take her to court. That is child abuse

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Did u say baby daddy.

Any parent that keeps their child from their other parent who loves, supports, and wants to be in their childs life is really hurting the child more than anything…don’t let your selfishness hurt your child. Eventually they will resent you for it.

If he’s that bad at keeping up with payments/ recognizing that he owes that money to his children-I would want that addressed before I devoted myself to him

Get the court involved.

Court is the only way to handle it. Best of luck to you all!

Get a court order for visitation… it will help this and possibly avoid issues later too

If we can believe your version, have him get a lawyer and go to court, if she violated previous orders chances she will get her privileges taken away!

Court is the only real opinion

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Only way to get him his rights to see them is through court

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for any rational answer, we need, as Paul Harvey used to say, to hear the rest of the story! this post is obviously one sided and there are no facts to support the generalities.

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Honestly not trying to be rude but this is their business and if he really cared he would fight for them and not “play nice” if it’s court ordered he needs to call the cops or have them make it to where she has to take them to the police everytime it his turn to get them

Let him go to court…

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Do you have children?

If not drop him and find a childless man. This is too much baggage

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You been with him 6 months , Mind yo business

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I’m dealing with the same thing

I would suggest staying out of it or get a man without that baggage. He knows he’s supposed to go to court. Its been going on for 3yrs. He has done nothing to fix the situation himself but go along with it. So(if you stay w/him) sit tight & enjoy the bs because you’re not gonna change anything for him. Unless you come out of pocket for him to go to court but that’s doing to much for a bf…

From a father that spend 18,000 and 18 months fighting in court and won everything. If there’s no court order papers then he has the same rights as her. So play nice for a bit and pay her the money and as soon as she let’s him see the girls like hey I’m taking them to dinner and I’ll bring them back later, don’t. Keep the girls and if she dhows up to get them back and she will and most likely she will call the cops but since there is no court order paypers the cops can’t do anything so at that point if she wants to see the girls she has to take him to court and the judge will decid what’s going to happen. But dong let her detirmen his life cause of the children. I know its hard I went threw it. But st the end the children are worth it.

Help a mama out and respond anonymously on our forum. My boyfriends ex has been keeping their kids from him: Advice? - Mamas Uncut

He needs to get a lawyer

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Hire a lawyer, go to court.

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Need to get a court order custody agreement and document everything

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Get a custody court order established. Then, ever time she withholds for any reason, go back to court and hold her in contempt. Going back and forth is useless. Get the paperwork asap

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Get an attorney ASAP

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My advice for him is going to court to establish a parenting plan. My advice for you is to not get involved. Support him in the background but you have no idea what their relationship was like prior to you beyowhat he says. You have no idea what his relationship is like with his children prior to you. But court is his best bet.

Court order rights needs a lawyer

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That’s bullcrap. No woman has that much power. Your boyfriend needs to go to court to get visitation. If he really cared about his kids he would have done this a long time ago. No judge is going to deny visitation unless he has an addiction or is abusive. Don’t blame the ex for him not seeing his kids. He could’ve gone to court if he really wanted to see them.

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First rule of your significant other having kids with someone else, steer clear, or you’re likely to upset both parents.

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3 years is a long time for him to put up with that and not go to court. Something is up

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Get an order, get as much time with kids as court allows and that he CAN do. Child support/money has NOTHING to do with his rights to spend time with his kids.

Legally speaking, child support and visitation are not contingent on one another. The sooner he takes her back to court, the sooner you, he, and those precious babies will stop being victims of her. Keep your head up and fight the good fight.

You cant help him and heres why…this has nothing to do with you. You’re his gf of 6 months so lets be honest…you probably dont know the entire story. She might be doing that shit and yeah its wrong and fucked up but its not your business. If you wanna stay in that relationship, you should probably mind your business and let them handle it. Its not your business to feel any type of way about anything. That is their business. I see all these women posting to get a lawyer and they are all 100% right BUT should that info come from random people online or a 6 month girlfriend? No. Hes the dad. Hes gotta take her to court without you and the world twlling him to

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Um he needs to go to family court

Take the court order to the police station and have them go with him to her house to pick up the kids

Keep this all documented, suggest he go to court for a parenting plan.

Honestly, that’s none of your business.

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Thats between them too… Stay out of it or youll make things worse

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Needs to file a motion for contempt with the court, also just so u are aware child support and visitation are two separate issues. Just because he pays child support it doesn’t entitle him to visitation

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I hate these kind of post

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Make sure to have proof of the money he has given her.

There could be a reason why she keeps them away. If he wants to see his kids then he can go to court. Unless he likes keeping in contact with her… ya know. And also 6 months is early to be getting involved with the kids and their mama.

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Thats his issue. Dont be that gf that gets involved.

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Go to court and ask for visitation and child support to be set up. Kill two birds with one stone. He will get visitation and he will have a set amount of money he pays her every month.

Parenting plan helps everything and with all the proof the judge will nail her not him and he will see the kids more.

Take her to court and get visitation rights established. Nothing they can say then… Don’t meet me or go to jail for obstruction… Choice is yours

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He needs to take her to court. Child support isnt paying to see your kids. He needs to grow a pair.

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He needs a lawyer. Parental alienation is something judges take very seriously these days.

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He needs to Take her to court.

Court. Thats basically it. People dont want to go thru it but hell have to. In my case, in ca, even though dad didnt pay child support he would still have a right to see them. Court stated theres nothin they can do but add fines. :pensive:

Lawyer up shes using the kids as a pawn and beaches like that are not good moms regardless the image they put iu5

The key words in your post are " your boyfriend’s kids" not your children, his. You said BF of 6 mos but they’ve been separated 3 yrs and she “always” keeps them away. Stay in your lane. You have nothing to gain from this.

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Is it court orders she can be held in contempt bro court , and go to jail . That is a very so much legal document. Mom’s forget that, they do court orders for child support but forget they have an obligation . You need to really put your food down and not be a pussy or scared, it’s his days she has and excuse call the police they will enforce the court order by law . Then document it and take her ass to court it’s not hard.keeo ally he documentation text , excuses and all her bullshit print it off , keep a personal log of her no shows, and her demanding extra money that is illegal to keep your kids for more ransom it’s a series thing you just have to to do it. Go to the court house tell them you want to amend the visitation because she Is breaking the court order , the clerks will give it to you and you fill it out pay the filing fee. Judge will give you a court date and show up tell the judge your side with your proof of documentation . She could get arrested right at court or they could give her a warning . People need to use there rights more. Or if it’s not court orders then get one and tell the clerks you want to court order visitation because she keeps the kids for ransom. You didn’t have to lawyer up , you just have to be confident and shoe her you mean buisness .

Its way cheaper to not lawyer up , and if you do lawyer up you could put in there she is responsible for the court fees really piss her off because if she would have stuck to the agreement you wouldn’t be waiting your time.

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Child support & parenting plan ordered through court is the resolution to all your problems.

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Tell dude to document everything and take her to court but just forewarning, this is none of your business. You’ve been dating him for less than a year and so you only hear his side of the story. If he really wanted to fight her he should’ve already started the process but if he’s bringing it up to you without doing anything…then he doesn’t care and is only using that excuse to gain your sympathy and for you to hate the baby mama.

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Tell him to go to court and have that agreement ratified!! He needs to record her saying he can’t have the kids on his days unless she gets more money!! He needs to keep a journal or calendar of his visits and reasons why he didn’t see them.
I would withhold child support but I would talk to a lawyer before doing that.

Take her to court have a patenting plan put into place

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Go to court. Get a set visitation schedule that she has to stick with. Child support and visitation are two separate things.

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Take it to court only if that father wants to. My exes gf tried to get involved and when my sons dad just wanted to sign his rights away she made him get a lawyer. He was given weekends and holidays and while they were together it was good. I thought my son would have bio dad around. They broke up. He hasn’t seen him since August. Stay in your lane. This has nothing to do with you. My son is now devastated and always asks why bio dad doesn’t want him. Im lucky my husband is so close to my son. My son calls him daddy. Because we all agreed on that. Then a gf showed up and tried to change things. If that man wants to do something about it then he will. It has nothing to do with u.

Get a lawyer and get everything in writing then his baby mama can’t say shit … and all you gotta do if she not gunna let your man see his kids you review the document with her … but ya you as the girl need to mind your business … But when she decided to be an ass I just tell him that she can see you in court if she’s gunna play a game like that… I also thought I should get involved with my boyfriends baby mama but her true colors will show soon enough that her kids get older …

Take it to a court mediator

Only solution is for him to go to court. Get things put in place legally.

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First of all you shouldn’t be involving yourself at all. You have been around for 6 months. That’s nothing. And if he does not like the situation then he should be going to court so that they can order visitation. He should also be recording all those interactions with her so he can prove she is using the kids as leverage. These are not your issues though. If he asks advice give it cautiously, otherwise stay out of it.

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First if he’s paying child support it is illegal 4 her to take money other than from the child support. U can let the child support know and she will get in trouble. As 4 the visiting if he has his days and she is not complying to giving him his days, she’s in violation and can also get in trouble. If u guys dont have s court order I suggest u guys get one. This wouldn’t be happening if one was in order. If u guys already have one call the court that she is in violation of the order. They’ll fix her real quick.

Take the B#@#h to court

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Court time and she gonna be in trouble.

I stay out of my bfs parenting issues. I told his ex it’s between them not me, and I’ve been with him 5 years. Just stay out of it it’s not your problem it’s his. That’s my best advice.

Simple: He needs to take her ASS to court cause if it was reversed the other way she would be all over him with court papers. The faster he does the quickest he’ll be able to see his girls. Also tell him to document everything on paper what he gives, save all conversations

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Maybe she’s on here asking for advice for him!! But honestly girl save yourself the stress because I promise your opinion doesn’t matter to the courts. If he wants to see them then stop paying her directly and file and pay through the courts. He can put himself on court ordered child support. Stay out of it it’s not worth your sanity

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My bf took baby momma to mediation and had paternity and parental rights established. When that didn’t work he took it to court and they drew up a legal agreement between both to establish parenting time. Laid it out 50/50 with my boyfriend being primary medical since she dosent take care of his ongoing condition. Now if she tries to withhold him he has legal grounds to call it in as kidnapping if needed and she’s held to that court order and could potentially throw the case and lose custody if she dosent comply. From one step momma to another stay strong. Its a difficult spot to be in.

Only solution is to take her to court to get a parenting plan in place. And not to sound rude but you shouldn’t really be involved this is something he has to deal with.

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So put money in child support escrow set it up with case worker advisor or whatever the title was a from the child support officer who is on the case it is a bit annoying and out of the way but so is what she is doing she only gets the money when she drops them off at a appointed location that it is documented and if she doesn’t then no money for her and she will be on record for the disregard to the orders of visitation

Not your circus, not your monkeys. Let him man-up and handle his business through the Court system.

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Go to the mf court and have them lay out custody, other than that cry about it. He should have went and already done all the court stuff. That’s on him. If he doesn’t have set days by the court clearly he’s done something wrong.

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Dont interfere much this situation. It is between his ex and him.

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He needs to stop playing games and go to court.

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Him go to court and do all necessary paperwork for child support and visitation. You stay out of it. It will cause more issues for him. One more thing when he does get visits don’t talk about the mother around them. Only know from experience

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Take her to court! She can’t do that legally. Even if he didn’t pay child support she can’t keep him from seeing them. It’s two separate things.

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This is where he buts his big boy panties on, gets a lawyer and the courts involved.

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He need to take her back to court.

Tell him to document everything including dates, times, phone calls and a brief paragraph about what happened. Then take her to court. Is rhe only way to get her to stop. Tell him to ask for joint custody, that way he wont have to pay child support. Also, what she is doing is called parent alienation and she can lose custody over it.

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There is an obvious answer to this question so I’m not sure why you are even asking…unless there’s a reason he can’t get the courts involved :thinking:

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If there are court papers that state visitation for him, he needs to take her to court but 1st document all the times he wae supposed to get them per the court order and what the reason was that he didn’t get them (even if it was fault of his own like he had to work or had other plans on his weekend). Most states will inform her that him not paying or not paying more than his required support order is not grounds to withhold visitation.

Not your circus, he’s a big boy who can find himself an attorney and deal with his baby momma himself.

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The only way to avoid these games is getting it on paper from the courts…then she would be held accountable!

File a parenting plan with reasonable custody and visitation and let a judge decide. I dont understand how child support is always set up and not custody and visitation. I’ve always thought that should be handled at the same time so no one can use the kids a pawns.

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Needs go to family court get court ordered visitation then if she withholds them she’s violating the order it’s that simple

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Court order. Let him handle this.

Hire a lawyer! Contact children services

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Document evening then take that bitch to court. Help him but try not to interfere to much or the mom will think your stepping out of bounds.

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Don’t get involved. You have only known him six months. There is more to this

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Obviously it doesnt mean enough to him in 3 years to take her to court. You need to stay out of it though, they arent your kids

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1st …Stay out of it. It’s not ur biz, especially if you’ve only been together a few months.( not being rude :wink:)
2nd… If is paying child support and is still having trouble getting his kids then he needs to go back to court!
He needs to get appointed visitation. Then when she still don’t give them he makes another court date. Saying she’s not follow court set rules. Then if she still keeps them from him he should go for full custody.

I have 2 boys whole don’t see their father. By their dads choice. They don’t pay child support and I’ve not asked for it, just that they be dad’s and be there for their kids but no luck. His kids r very lucky to have him.
God bless.

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