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QUESTION:
“I visited my sister and her family. For the 2nd time in a row, my brother-in-law has tried to sleep with me. My sister is deeply in love with him and this would devastate her. They have been together for over a decade and he loves her. He was wasted both times. I’m in a very hard spot. Should I tell her or save her from the pain?”
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TOP ANSWERS (AS SELECTED BY MODERATOR):
The following top answers have been selected by a moderator from hundreds of responses to the original question.
“Personally I would have a conversation with both of them. Sit them down and explain the situation. Explain that when he is so intoxicated he tries to sleep with you and that you worry there may be an alcohol issue going on. I wouldn’t run to your sister and say it unless you do have proof because she may try and say you’re lying. Confronting him alone and asking what is going on is another option but also tell him you will be telling her. I think telling them both is mature and that way all parties are aware of what happens/ed because he may not even remember.”
“I would definitely tell her if it was my sister. I wouldn’t want to hurt her but I would definitely feel she deserves to know the truth about him…”
“If he is doing this towards you, her own sister, is he doing this to other women behind her back? I would tell her! Also, this wasn’t a first time, this was a second time- this is repetitive … this is a problem!”
“Your loyalty lies with your sister. If hes trying to sleep with you hes definitely trying other people as well.”
“Let her know and say he makes you feel uncomfortable”
“You gotta tell her. How many times has he done this to others? How many times has he succeeded? She needs to know, plus if she finds out that you DIDN’T tell her that might hurt your relationship too.”
“I would tell my sister. He would be messing with other women 100% .”
“I would tell her 100% just be aware that it may not turn out the way you wish… been in a similar situation and they chose their partner over the truth… good luck xx”
“How does he love her but he’s willing to do something he knows would hurt his wife? Girl, that’s your sister.”
“Tell her and ask her to get tested for std in case he’s pulled this with other women”
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