So my daughter is grounded once again and I am debating on not allowing to go to her grandmother’s while I am not there, like over nights? When my daughter has her phone I have apps monitoring what she is doing and try to keep her away from the dangers of technology these days. But her grandmother just hands her a phone and let’s her do whatever on it? What else is she allowing or not monitoring? I am just not sure I can trust either of them.
My 11 year old daughter has been asking for about a year now for a tiktok account. I have told her no numerous times and explained me reasons as to why the answer is no. So sometime over summer break my daughter was grounded from her. While her phone was taken away I found out that her grandmother allowed her to use an old phone that she had AND helped her download and set up a tiktok account. Her grandmother knew that I didn't want her having tiktok. I confronted grandmother and she said she didn't allow it but maybe she said yes while she was busy or not paying attention. My daughter told me her grandmother put in her Gmail info and set up the users name which I do believe because the user name was said grandmother's name and daughter does not have an Gmail address. The profile picture was my daughter and all videos posted where videos my daughter made.
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Before stoping visits speak to grandma and tell her if you let her on the phone after I said no she will no longer be able to come stay here with you don’t just keep her from grandma … grandmas are important in children’s lives
Help a mama out and respond anonymously on our forum. My daughter is being sneaky at her grandmas, what can I do? - Mamas Uncut
I’d rather my child stay away from a grandparent who doesn’t care rather than be taken by a pedophile 
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She would definitely be grounded from grandmas house for a while. Your child, your rules! You explained why it wasn’t safe and the dangers of the app and that’s the end of it!
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Your child, your rules. Grandma knew that & disrespected you. I wouldn’t allow her there without you anymore
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Tik Tok has parental controls. Maybe when she’s done with her punishment you can set up a Tik Tok together and you can monitor it. Make the account private and set parental controls on usage. Download it on your phone and be logged in on the same account so you can get the notifications she gets. Set time limits. Maybe make some fun dancing ones with her. This could be something a bond is built over! 
As for the grandma i’d have a serious talk about going behind your back, make it clear that you are the parent.
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Would stay with her when she goes over. Sorry the grandma disrespected your wishes. Your child your rules. I’m sure you explained the dangers to the grandma but maybe reiterate them
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Grandma is toxic and overstepping and absolutely should not be allowed to keep your child again until there’s been a serious come to Jesus meeting over this! I’m sure she doesn’t understand how dangerous social media can be for kids, heck adults! I would be furious!!
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Seriously young one - a lot of us elders don’t realize the dangers out there in tech. Why don’t you have her watch a few - “Web of lies” on the ID channel - to demonstrate the real dangers out there. You need to also tell her - your child your rules and if she can’t respect them - then ground both of them (no talk no visit) for a bit.
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Grandparents should respect parents & the rules you set. You however, need to teach your child safety with technology. You can’t keep her from it and then expect her to thrive in a world that uses technology for literally everything. Just teach her how to be safe with it.
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Your child your rules! Period! If grandparents or whoever else doesn’t respect that then no, they don’t need to be around. I can’t tell you how many times I’ve fought this same fricken battle.
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Ur rule ur kid if both won’t listen respect both wouldn’t be allowed to hang
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I agree with all above. You also have to realize you are going to have to give her a little more freedom and she is going to have to start making decisions for herself. I would educate her the dangers and strange things to stay away from and not punish her because other people are weirdos. I feel like you are going to push her away from you the more autocratic you try to be.
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She’s 11. You’re in control. If you can’t do it now imagine how bad it will be in 5 years.
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Yeah no grandma’s till grandma can follow the rules as well that’s not a well at my house kind of rule …my 10 yr old is currently grounded from internet access I do not allow any social media until they are and can show they are mature enough to handle it she did the same thing and sneakily set up a tiktok her videos were not nice she was very negative lied about what shes allowed to do and not do and was mean to her friend this is what got her grounded from internet access she proved my rule is in place for a reason and she is not mature enough to handle social media…this is a non negotiable rule and applies to all places she visits
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If she can’t respect the rules you set for your child then I wouldn’t allow her to go! Some grandmother’s get this mommy complex and want to put themselves in a parents shoes… Directly allowing her to do things that she knows are not allowed is undermining you and making your daughter think that’s ok … It’s absolutely not! Stick to your rules and let her grandma know how you feel!!
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I don’t tell my mother what to do. But i also don’t feel super strongly about Tiktok. I monitor the kids and so far so good
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Grandma is as immature as your daughter, she is not taking into account The dangers of social media for children
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I’m not sure that grounding your child for her grandmothers actions is the most effective approach here. Keeping her from spending time alone with grandma might work on grandma. If your mother is creating problems in your family it might be good to put some distance between everyone
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Ugh- welcome to the TikTok battle. Been here-!!! Sadly my issue was with my x who was okay with it. My kiddo cares less about TikTok this year then the past 2 and the battle isn’t as bad. I wish I had wisdom for you. I wouldn’t keep her from grandmas but I would explain to grandma that should this happen again she won’t be allowed over.
I follow this line of thinking: take away the person’s title (family/grandma)… would you allow anyone else to disrespect your wishes with your child like this? Would you allow anyone else to do this with you child? If those answers are NO then don’t change it just because someone holds a title (like family).
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I understand your frustration but you got to remember one thing Grandma is not going to be around one day and your daughter is going to despise you for keeping her away from her have a good talk with Grandma but do not keep them away from each other please I’m begging you because in a long run it’s going to backfire on you when she gets older she’s going to throw that in your face and resent you for it please talk to Grandma again and talk to your daughter communication is the key solution
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You have to let your mother know she follows the rules you have in place for your child or she will only see your child under your supervision. Your the parent. You make the rules.
Gma has shown you she will not respect you as a parent and can’t be trusted with the responsibility of your daughter. I wouldn’t allow your daughter over there unless you’re there too, no sleepovers.
Make a TikTok yourself and watch your daughters TikTok on what she does. My daughter was 11 when she got hers. I watch everything she does. I even get in videos with my daughter when she is making them. I’ll video bomb them lol.
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I just sold my daughter’s phone when we started running into this issues. I gave her 2 chances, 3 chance and it was gone. As well as most of her other electronics.
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Ide be very upset! And good for you not allowing an 11 year old to just do whatever, sounds to me like your daughter tells you the truth. Give the grandmother another chance and tell her the consequences of said rules if broken- tell your daughter that you’re going to allow her to go and that she needs to be a 100 percent honest with you, tell her you’re only doing your job as her mom to keep her safe from all the predators pretending to be kids!
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Man, I thought this was about me. I had this exact problem with my daughter, except it was happening at a friend’s house. She used her friend’s old phone to create an account and got caught with that phone at my house. Yea, things didn’t go so well for her after that. Not only is she no longer allowed at the friends house, but she’s monitored, like a hawk. Her room is searched, she only gets to shut her door at bedtime and I can see and control everything she is doing on her current phone. If that happened at her grandparents house, she wouldn’t be going over there anymore either. My child, my rules. If the adults in the home aren’t respecting my rules, then they aren’t respecting my kids or I. So, guess who wouldn’t see my kids anymore
Unpopular opinion. You can’t trust your daughter because you’re not giving her any trust. Let her download TikTok. Create the account. Monitor her phone. Set up parental controls. If you want your daughter to be open with you you have to allow her to be herself and expect honesty in return. She’s going to go behind your back if you continue to act like this. The best thing that you can do is set up a reasonable line of communication between the two of you in my opinion. That’s obviously not natural to you based on the way that you’re raising your daughter and I absolutely understand that. I’m not saying that there’s anything wrong with that at all. I just want to show you a different way of thinking about it. And I’m certainly going against the grain based on the other comments on this thread. But if I want honesty from my daughter I would give her the openness to do what she wants and to be honest with me about it.
My son, he’s 10, has a YouTube and a tictock. I have his accounts signed into my phone so I can monitor. I also xhe k out router history to see what he’s been looking at. If I ask him and he lies is the only time there is punishment, even of he looked at something he shouldn’t have. This creates trust and allows him to be vulnerable with me.
Also, to the people telling you not to see your mother any more… It hurts my heart that people would take away the person your daughter seems to bond and trust with. No advice on that. Just my input
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Grandma may not have known what she was logging her into. My mom has no idea what TikTok is. The kids talk about it and she is clueless.
Tik tok doesnt allow users under the age of 13, if you post her username we can report the account 
Sorry if it’s not helpful just thought I’d share that bit of information
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My daughter is 8 and has a Android and I set her up a email etc and downloaded family link on my phone and you can control the apps she has access to as well as what she downloads I put where my daughter has to get permission and I have to put in a password before she can download a app, it tracks all her activities shows how long she’s on her phone etc.
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TikTok is complete shit for anyone under 15. There’s really so much inappropriate stuff on it. Doesn’t matter if there’s an account or not, the stuff they see… I won’t let it
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No social media until 13, this a rule. Grandma needs to not have unsupervised visit.
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Keep acting like this and you’re daughter is going to act way worse as she gets older.
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Pedophiles on tik tok grooming kids for sexual assault. BEWARE…
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I wouldn’t be so quick to bash the grandma. She very well could have just have said yes to downloading the app, while busy and not thought anything of it. Is she usually a trustworthy person ? I’m assuming since you let your daughter go over there. Are you 100% sure your daughter isn’t lying about Grandma entering her email address? She could have very easily said “ Hey Gma, what’s your email address ?” Then entered it herself. Your daughter has clearly lied to you several times in the past. Who’s to say she’s telling the truth now ? At 11 years old she knew exactly what she was doing( after you told her absolutely not ). Sounds like Grandma isn’t the problem.
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I went through this with my 8 year old and 78 year old grandmother except grandma knew nothing of it. So I had to school grandma, put a passcode on her phone and took all electronic devices away for a month.
Your dtr. is young and you can expect these kinds of things from her. The grandmother is not respecting your parenting and therefore allows whatever. Maybe she isn’t aware of the dangers. I would explain to them, together, that until they do not do things that you don’t approve of; your dtr. can only see grandma when you are present. I always respected and abided by my daughter and son-in-law’s rules.
My daughter has tik tok but I monitor it. I downloaded family link to keep tabs on her phone and what she’s doing. I’ve also connected my tik tok to hers so I know what she spotting and if anyone talks to her. I occasionally not every time but once a month or when she’s giving me major attitude go through the phone to see what’s up when she’s asleep. I trust her and I’ve slowly stopped the snooping but she just turned 11 and theirs alot of sickos out there. I learned that the more I say no to things the more she will do it behind my back so I watch and step in when she’s going out of line. I rather her be mad at me for a while then me upset about not being able to stop something I could of stopped from happening
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Let her have the account and monitor it. This generation is raised with social media. Better to teach her how to be responsible while using it or she will Always be sneaking around.
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Maybe your over reacting on the whole no tik tok thing.
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Grandma needs to understand your rules and lying is not acceptable
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Id be very upset too
Maybe daughter lied since she hid the fact that she did it at all. It’s not hard to say to
Gma what is your email I need it for a game or whatever excuse she could come up with
Tell grandma my story. My girl was on those apps and on teen chat sites. She was sexually exploited by GROWN MEN!!! Pics, texts, etc. She was 13. Ws almost lost her to sex trafficking! Social media if any kind, even monitored is dangerous. We had her heavily monitored and it still happened. You make the rules. If they can’t listen, no contact. It’s her safety and u r mom.
Tiktok should have n age limit no one under the age of 18. I think it’s crap I’d never allow my kids to have it
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Awareness and education is key.
grandma needs to have a serious conversation about this. Maybe share some links, cases, statistics, good YouTube presentation that alerts of the dangers.
If grandma understands, Maybe she too will go out of her way to protect her grandchild.
And awareness and education on dangers for daughter too!
Good luck!
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I let my daughter have tiktok, but no other social media sites. The kids like the videos. I just check her phone and all often. It is wrong that her grandmom went behind your back and met her if you said no .
Grandma I wouldn’t trust anymore like you said if she’s doing that what else is she doing, however I would educate your daughter rather than not let her do things, this generation is built around technology and social media, one way or another she will be on there you’d rather she did it with you knowing and being about to monitor it rather than behind your back x
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Keep doing you…you are the parent, I’m going through this with my son now!! The answer is still no for my son…plain and simple NO, if your mom can’t follow what you have set for your answer then there is your answer…dont let her go over there!! It’s hard setting rules and boundaries for kids now days it sucks if your mom thinks it ok if you already told her no
I HATE when Grandparents feel like it is OK to how’s against what the parents say. That is so damn wrong
As a child of strict parents, it’s extremely important that we build trust with our children so they feel comfortable coming to us if they feel something is not right. I personally would allow her to have it and monitor her activities on the account and teach her about the dangers of being online. I wasn’t thought those things, only that I wasn’t allowed to have them and as a result I snuck around behind my parents backs and was groomed because they didn’t teach me how to be safe they fought me avoidance
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Theres definitely worse aps out there. You can’t shelter your kid from the world. Teach her how to better handle the world.
I do find it disturbing someone undermined your decision as her parent though. Talk to grams and be clear when she teaches your kid to not listen to you now she leaves the door open for your kid to think it’s OK to listen to more other adults over you. And that’s dangerous.
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What I say goes. I have family link on both kids phones (11 & 9). But they know what they can and can’t do. Even at other people’s houses they are honest and say "my mommy doesn’t allow us to eat/ watch this ect. It’s all about the relationship yall have. I’ve had several trafficking/pedophile etc talks with them. My kids know how our world is. I hide nothing from them. When a school shooting happened a few cities over I told them about it. I explained to them that is a consequence of kids bullying others. I’m very thankful for the relationship we have because they tell me everything just like I hold nothing back from them. My best advice is to stand firm in your choices. Talk to her grandma and tell her if she can’t respect your wishes and rules then she can’t go over to stay the night. Plain and simple. Regardless what anyone says, that’s your child. You are the parent.
I went through this w my kid. They will find a way. There’s so many different ways to access those apps even if u don’t have a phone. Or some of them will use their friends phones , laptops, and tablets. So I couldn’t monitor the friends phone or tablet. I made a tic tok account under my name or use a bogus name and email just for that. It’s my account but her friends are on it . I don’t have my ppl on it . I also have fam members on their pages or apps so they can also see what the kids r doing. this way I know everything she’s doing on it. That’s the only way my kids r allowed to use those apps. keeping her away from the grandma I wouldn’t do that. I just don’t think keeping her from family is a form of punishment. Things r crazy these days and things can change in a matter of seconds especially w covid . U never know how long u have w someone.
Teach internet safety cause rn you’re not teaching her anything
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Doesn’t matter where your daughter stays the night. Your rules are your rules and they need to be respected. I have family members who are the exact same way. When my kids were little, my rules were not respected. It still pisses me off to this day especially when I’m reading something similar. You may have to get a little tough on grandma. They like to ignore our rules and spoil the grandkids. Not okay…
Good luck.
As a parent of girls them having tiktok is a no for me. It’s not about what she post but what she would see or hear. You can’t monitor what they are viewing. I see some that I don’t think are appropriate at all.
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Are you sure your daughter isnt lying? I have a feeling grandma may not have known. I would sit Grandma and 10 year old and try to talk about it.
As a grandma I respect the rules my children want for them. Whether I agree with them are not. I’m not their parent and the are trusting me with their children
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I would have a huge issue with the grandmother disregarding your wishes and then out and out lying about it. This behavior shows she doesn’t respect you and shows your child that it’s ok to go behind your back to do things that aren’t allowed. There needs to be a conversation and limited access until you’re sure grandma understands the seriousness of her actions.
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Ohhh… That would be a no no on grandma’s part!! How dare her go past the parent’s rules. I’d confront grandma and tell her, under no circumstances does she have a right to teach YOUR child to cheat or lie to her mother. And it better not happen again
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Actually tiktok doesn’t allow any child under 13 to have an account, they cracked down and are banning all minor accounts so I wouldn’t allow it period
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I think grandma got swindled. Talk to them both and delete the account, set up ground rules
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Who cares ,let her be a kid, u will regret it later, and she will hate u
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I’m a very relaxed parent myself but tiktok has endless adult videos that children don’t need to be exposed to. I use tiktok a ton and see sexual content, violent content. Just the other day a clip was posted from a video where a man tortured a girl and cut her head off (a real video that was leaked).
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Do you allow your daughter on YouTube when she has her phone? If so she has access to Tictoc videos that way. Found that out courtesy of my 11 year old. Just saying as a FYI because I had no idea.
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Grandma need to be grounded.
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is it private at least
First of, let her get the tick toc… and just monitor… cause she’s just gonna see it elsewhere, teach her about using apps and things like this… education is key… not allowing… that just makes kids wanna do or have more… and end up doing or using in an unsafe manner… maybe do a trial run, let her have app set so compromised limits ect… but flat out not allowing… your daughter is just gonna resent you and if you think her sneaking tic tok at grandma place is bad… good luck when she’s a teenager…
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I have a 9 year old who has her own phone! Her step daddy an I monitor everything she doesn’t on the phone. iPhone also has a feature where you can lock in screen time so the phone is basically useless after a certain time.
We also have apps on our phones that allow us to monitor what she does on her, granted she is a minor.
Once she is 13, I will allow her to have her own privacy WITH the exception she allows me to check her phone when I ask (for her safety).
Give her some breathing room. Let her have the tiktok and just monitor her closely. Shoot, create your own TikTok and watch her account that way!
Also have her give you the log in info so you can access her account.
Don’t just shut her down. That’ll only create resentment and rebellion the older she gets. Be open minded with her. I totally understand wanting to protect her. But don’t become extremely overbearing. Remember, we were her age once and all we wanted was a little trust and privacy.
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Isn’t tiktok set up for 13 and up? What your mom and daughter did is sign a agreement for an account under false pretence and you might want to tell both of them they could be in deep trouble. Have your mom cancel the account before tictok sues.
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As grandma I can tell you she was wrong. Unfortunately sometimes our desire to want to give them more than we could our own can be overwhelming. Sit grandma down and tell her flat out…never…ever again…and why you monitor her technology so closely. But please…please never separate grandma from her grands. Not for an infractuon that caused no ill harm. Kids need that relationship as much as grands. Stay strong for your daughter in your rules. But remember grandparents are also not perfect…but the love is undeniably perfect for their grands❤
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Who’s the parent?
Pretty simple. You are.
Your child, your rules.
Grandma needs to stay in her lane.
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Nope she wouldn’t be going to grandmas unsupervised anymore. If grandma is willing to completely circumvent all rules and give her amount phone to use that’s an absolute deal breaker
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Do what you need to. But don’t keep her away from grandma. My daughter in law keeps my munchkins away from us. It hurts everyone. Ours was over a 4 wheeler. The youngest was to young and little to drive by herself. All over a 4 wheeler. Because her older sister could drive by herself. Only in low gears. It’s been over a year since we seen them. Don’t do that to her grandma
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Wow! This kid is gonna go bat shit crazy when she turns 18. Pick your battles.
Your kid not hers. I wouldn’t let her go over for awhile. Your daughter knew she wasn’t allowed and so did grandma. Both are at fault
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I have a 15 yr old boy who’s been having a phone since he was 11 but he trusts me enough and just recently told me about this woman who messaged him wanting to be his sugar momma so I obviously jumped on his dms and let that woman know to leave my minor son alone. U definitely need to have a good relationship with ur daughter for her to know she can have access to these apps and come to u if she ever feels she’s being preyed on.
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as a grandmother to a 13 yr old girl & 23 yr old boy, I can & can not understand why either of them are doing this, One, your daughter might be manipulating her grandmother, And telling her one thing, which isn’t true, And the grandmother just might want to do everything to please her granddaughter,
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Yea blame grandma for your kid being sneaky not only did she swindle grandma but also you too by getting you to blame grandma…that will cause your sneaky kid to get even sneakier. How about hold the kid responsible and punish her to a point where she wont try to sneak and swindle you or grandma?
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Yeah that “grandma” would not be allowed around my child unless I was present. End of story.
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Wow y’all are so harsh on grandma and cutting off their relationship all together or unless it’s supervised and that is really sad. I get the moms rule but grandma also might not be up to date on the hip things like tik tok-or even realize what she was helping her sign up for. Cut her some slack. If your daughter had grandmas phone then she could have easily set it up herself and user grandma’s email. There are so many scenarios that could have happened. That aside, your daughter knew your rules, and she willing broke them. Yes ground her, talk to them both together so everyone is on the same page and to prevent this kind of stuff in the future, and ffs let her hang out with her grandmother. Grandmas should be treasured- I never had any growing up they were already gone. Encourage that relationship. People’s comments on here disgust me.
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I don’t allow my 8yo to have tik tok. She asks me every day. Simple reason, it’s not for kids. It’s a 13+ app. My son tried to get one at 12. I reported his account for being underage and it was taken down. The best compromise is to allow it to be watched with supervision. I have a 14yo who let’s my 8yo watch it on her phone, but is careful to make sure she doesn’t see or hear things she’s too young for. The scary part of tik tok is its just swiping. So kids can very easily accidentally come across something they shouldn’t.
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Ground Grandma too!!
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I applaud you for not going off on the grandmother. I wouldn’t allow her to visit her unless you’re there.
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No gramma overnights. Show gramma the dangers!!!
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As a grandmother I say she was wrong to go against your wishes.
You are the parent not her.
Id expect not to see my grandaughters again tbh.
I dont even hand out sweets unless mom and Dad say its OK because their sugar intake is limited and I dont know what they’ve already had that day.
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My son has tictoc, but it is also signed into his account on my phone which allows me to see what he sees.
I understand the need to protect you kids, but kids will push boundaries and the more you push back the sneakier they get, which means if/when they get into a difficult situation they can’t turn to you.
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I’ve never allowed my kids to have tiktok either. When they visit their grandma, they aren’t allowed to use electronics, other than watching TV with her. I explained to them that they’re there to spend time with her. I limit screen time at home, as well. I know it’s hard for grandparents to say no, but some things have to be a big no.
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I’m a grandmom and I helped raise my two granddaughters I oked for my husband to buy a phone for our 14 yr old it’s an iPhone her mom don’t work I still pay all our bills so her mom got a little mad but the baby daddy backed me up
That’s a dangerous app
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A kid who can use Tik Tok can easily create a Gmail account too. It’s most likely that she created the Gmail account and the Tik Tok account all on her own. Yes, grandma was wrong for doing something you don’t agree to, and yes the explanation she gave seems to be quite a lousy one, but this definitely won’t stop at the grandma (implying that she’ll definitely find someone else to allow her access to Tik Tok).
Like someone had said above you’d have to talk it our with your own daughter if you want this to stop. If you’ve given her an explanation and she still did this then your explanation was most likely not convincing enough for her (I’m not saying that your reasons are not legit, all I’m saying is that what seems convincing to an adult doesn’t always seem as convincing to kids)
Lastly, when trying to explain your reasons to your kid, it would be better to avoid coming off as authoritarian. When it feels like an order rather than an advice, it provokes kids into rebelling.
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Nope. If the grandma can’t respect your rules then, stop your daughter from going over the night and without supervision.
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Grandma probably had no idea what was actually going on. Grandma just thought her sweet grand baby was doing something shes allowed to do. Your child most likely knows that and is using that to her advantage. She knew that she wasn’t supposed to be on it and manipulated her grandma to do it. She’s blaming grandma because that takes away some of the anger and blame from her. Grandma most likely didn’t purposely go against your wishes and I think it’s screwed up that so many people are jumping to that conclusion. Some of yall are on a serious power trip. “dOnT lEt HeR sEe GrAnDmA”. I have 2 daughters. One 8 and one will be 14 on the 29th. They’re both sneaky AF and have tried these same manipulation tactics against every adult in their lives.
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No tic tok acct for 11 yr old
My daughter did the same thing. Lied and lied and then she said she was learning dance moves and posting them. I learned they were sexualized dance moves. She lied again. Then got caught. Her dad supported her having tic tok.
My husband and I didn’t. Now she’s grounded for 5 months without the phone and had to delete snap chat and tic tok. She has extra chores too for lying.
My mom does similar enabling annoying and disrespectful behavior. She thinks she’s better parent than me and enables bad behavior. Coddling. I don’t allow my kids to go over her house when she purposely disregards and overrides our structure and rules. The kids walk all over her and when they come back to our house it’s so much repair/work to restructure them. That’s why we limit interaction. Don’t allow ur daughter to have any overnights for half a yr or more. And avoid having her go over her grandmas for long while. And when she goes over u will have to be present.
This is the process to set healthy boundaries and enforce your parenting style. Enforce respect.
Ur mother just wants to be the favorite and thinks if she gives ur daughter whatever she wants she will love her. She’s in the wrong and that is showing ur daughter she can step all over u. Teenyboppers r sneaky and liers. They make a lot of mistakes. To avoid more problems than u have to u need to deal with ur mother as if she is is not responsible parent or she will corrupt ur kids.
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Grandparents spoil kids all the time you are lucky to have her. All you could do is tell her what you are not okay with and remind her of the reasons. My son has a limit of 3 hours a day on tech. When he is with my mum it’s christmas.he will drain my old phone and hers. I talk to him about it but not her because she is old,he is a handful and secondly it’s not that big a deal because it’s just games. But internet is a whole different ball game. Please don’t take away their bonding time. Just remind your mum again and she won’t let her do it.
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In my opinion… the more you treat it like a bad thing the more your daughter is going to do it. Get involved with it with her. Now a days there is no avoiding technology. If it’s hard to find trust in them then maybe step back and help yourself understand these things so you have trust in yourself to help feed the trust in them looking at all the negative isn’t helping you and the teenage years mold a lot so I would just think about what type of relationship you want with your daughter and with the grandmother yes there needs to be boundaries she needs to understand you are the parent and what you say goes but you all also have to understand if this is really the case and she has helped her do this then there is a bond there that is very fragile at this point all of your bonds are just think before you act and maybe take some time to see things for what they are I get there is so much out there we want to keep from our children but we all have that natural curiosity and no matter how hard we try there is no keeping from it
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