"My daughter has a best friend that was coming over a lot before school ended; I’d also let her go to her house. She’s given my daughter lice twice. I have three girls & a one-year-old boy. Both times my daughter ended up giving it to one of her sisters. The 2nd time, she also gave it to me, & my son & he’s too little to sit still, so I had to shave him bald. We battled it for almost two months. I had washed everything in hot water & dried on high heat, done the whole tree tea oil in everything, new brushes, sprayed everything & even fogged the house. Didn’t allow any friends to come over & didn’t allow them to go over to anyone’s house. We have all finally been clean for three weeks. But now her best friend is asking to come over & Idk what to do. She’s been bored this summer cause she misses her friends, but I really don’t wanna deal with lice anymore. I’d wanna know for sure she’s clean before allowing her to come over, but I don’t wanna offend her or her mom. What would y’all suggest??"
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TOP ANSWERS (AS SELECTED BY MODERATOR):
The following top answers have been selected by a moderator from hundreds of responses to the original question.
"Nope. Nope. Nope. I personally have spent entirely too much money on treating this due to my daughter bringing it home. I wouldn’t let her come over. This is a personal choice made by her parents, caregivers, etc to not take care of this. And I would be 100% honest with your daughter. That’s what I have done. I know it’s a tough situation but again, it’s a hard no for me."
"I had a friend like this when I was in elementary school she gave me lice twice and the last time my mom treated her hair too (with baby oil and cling wrap) then went to her house and found out she lived with her elderly grandparents that just weren’t able to treat it (low income)so she helped them and neither of us ever got it again… long story short there may be other factors involved and to try to be kind they may just have hit a hard time or just uneducated in how to take care of it."
"Back in the day, I remember if my friends had lice my mama just did their hair like she would my own because all my friends were her kids too because well “ it takes a village to raise a child” . Be a part of her best friend's village not against it. I try to achieve to be that momma."
"Offend the mom. I can't imagine how uncomfortable my child's friends would be if they had lice and the family did nothing to treat it. It can make them anemic and in rare cases, they can die from it. I would simply tell the mother the situation, tell her you would love to have her come over but you can't risk it because of your other kids. Maybe the other person is overwhelmed by it and doesn't know how to properly get rid of it. Offer her some help."
"I would just talk to the mother. Say something like “My daughters really been wanting your daughter to come over but we just found some lice in our daughter's hair and had a massive clean in our home and all the kid's hair. I know your daughter was here not too long ago and I would hate if the lice also infected your daughter. Have you checked her or had any issues? I would hate for this to be bouncing back and forth between them since they really enjoy hanging out.” Something like that doesn’t make it like you’re blaming her kid or anything."
"Tell the mom your daughter had lice and since she was playing with the other child the mom may want to check her. Don't play a blame game, just let it be known that your household had it and it would be wise for her to make sure they don't."
"Start putting tea tree oil in your shampoo. It's an all-natural way to repellent. Have them play outside and explain that there is to be no sharing of clothes, brushes, hair ties or anything and no hugging or anything like that."
"Check the friend's head when she comes over. If she has lice, call the mom to pick her up. That’s what my parents and my friend's parents did."
"I'd just treat the girl's hair when she's over. There's some brilliant fast working lice treatment now."
"Definitely not! Maybe play outside at a park in an open area. Keep washing with tea tree oil too. I would talk to her parents. That’s not good."
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