When I was a kid I acted up and my dad went and made me give my christmas gifts and birthday gifts to all the little kids on my block. I had to pick out 4 gifts to give each. And then I got my door token off the hinges and my bed ended up being a pallet on the floor and I had 4 outfits until I learned to value what i had.
I’m interested in reading the comments, because I could have written this myself! Me and my husband are so fed up with how unappreciative our kids are. They do not value anything! We found heads ripped off dolls they got for Xmas too! And we got our 3.5 year old son a workbench set, him and his 5 yo sister broke it down piece by piece. The only thing they even KINDA take care of is the 7yo’s Xbox and the 11yo’s iPhone. But we’re constantly on their ass about keeping it nice because they wouldn’t if we didn’t. I think we’re leaning towards no more big gifts because of this. Clothes, books, shoes, stuff they need. But man it makes me feel horrible. I just don’t know what to do. Spanking their butts when I find the stuff messed up has done absolutely nothing. Talking and explaining why they need to keep their things nice, went in one ear and out the other. Time outs didn’t work. Taking their stuff away doesn’t work. They won’t clean up their rooms and I threaten to throw everything away, and they say “ok”… but I feel like trash when me and my husband are at the store and we get stuff or we come home with stuff for us and not them. I’m raising spoiled brats. And unspoiling them is HARD!
Do what you think is right , you already know it . Good luck♥
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The first mistake was buying them all that stuff. Knowing the true meaning of Christmas is far more important than any amount of material things you could ever buy them.
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People on the streets have b days.
Give a birthday card and dinner. And until they turn 16 dont buy any electronics, nothing that works with a battery. Only toys without batteries, clothes, etc. Take all the Christmas gifts away and let them earn them back one by one with chores and good behaviour. And take the ipads away until they are 16 or sell the ipad thats still working.
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From the sounds of it you had a harder up bringing than your kids. So you’re doing what I struggle with, over doing it because you remember what it was like growing up and not having much. I know you just want to give your kids a good life, however children this age never appreciate things necessarily. Anyone who tells you different is ridiculous because all our kids go through an age where they don’t appreciate stuff, this idea that it’s all the parents fault is not necessarily true. Kids to an extent always will want more, new toys, new this and that. It’s about doing what you’re capable of, stop going out of your way momma. Once they learn you stopped doing it because they proved they can’t take care of things, they’ll start learning. Things like toys, tablets, whatever gets your kids engine going should be something that’s earned, never just given. Maybe start a chore sheet that they have to complete in order to get said reward, make goals on behaviors so if they want something they need to behave a certain way for a certain amount of time to get it. You’re doing a good job, I know you’re just trying to do the best for your babies. Xoxo 
I would take every single toy and make them do chores to get them back piece by piece so they understand that is hard work earning these things
I’d take absolutely all they’re toys and other things away (minus books and crafts things) and tell them they can earn it back one piece at a time for their behavior or it can be donated one piece at a time for their behavior.
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Kids break stuff and are hard on things. It’s just their nature and immaturity. You give kids bottles, then sippy cups, then plastic cups, and when they get the hang of that, glassware. You don’t give them expensive crystal for their drinks. Don’t expect perfection. Buy stuff that’s less breakable: soft dolls, jump ropes, chalk, paints, LEGOs, a bike. Buy second hand, swap stuff with other moms. The less complex something is, the more they have to use their imaginations.
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Only let them play with breakable stuff with you managing it. You hold the tablet while they use it, then lock it away/put it where they can’t reach it once they are done. This teaches them that some things are fragile and need more care than other things. Fragile stuff goes somewhere secure and they have to ask permission to play with it under supervision only.
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Only give them a few toys at a time so they really feel it when something breaks. Either stop buying so much stuff so they only have so much to play with, care for, and put away (actually may be a relief to them), or rotate toys from storage. Ten items each is plenty. Kids won’t say they have too many toys, but the sheer number may be overwhelming to them. Also, boredom breeds creativity.
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Do they have an allowance for things? When my kids kept complaining about their clothes I gave them an amount and they had to buy their own. Once the money was gone, that’s it. I taught them value too. Spend more on stuff you will use all the time or are hard on so it lasts, buy cheap for stuff you use rarely, that will go out of style quickly, or that you don’t wear out as much.
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They want time with you, not stuff. What do you remember of your childhood? Probably special or just everyday time with your parent(s), not the stuff you had. We remember the magic, extended family, foods and music and surprise of Christmas vs. what came in the boxes. Give experiences: trips to interesting restaurants, museums, historic sites, gardens, parks, playgrounds, zoos, play areas, swimming pools, classes—especially if you can do it together. Many places have great educational programs for kids, and this expands their minds instead of just occupying time. Online programs and tours let you experience fabulous places from around the country and world. Go on day trips or more to see sights if you can swing it, with each child getting a small budget or limit of one or two souvenirs if any. Involve them in planning what to do and see. The younger they are the more “do,” adding in more “see” as they mature.
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Volunteer regularly at various places so they can see how lucky they are, like Habitat for Humanity, Christmas in April, clean up days, clothing and food drives, soup kitchens and homeless shelters. Religious institutions often have programs assembling meals for the needy, buying presents for kids who otherwise wouldn’t have any, liaison programs that work with low income neighborhoods to teach/converse in English, provide homework help, friendship, etc. and even mission trips to build or provide assistance to those in poverty or hit by disasters at home and abroad. Do whatever is age appropriate.
The best gifts are time, conversations and listening. Good luck! Thank you for caring enough to rear caring children.
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My oldest broke his 2 ds when they first came out( he was 6 at the time) i told him he had to pay for a new one… He work by doing chores, helping the neighbors out and took him roughly 5 months to replace it
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Start giving them an allowance for doing chores around the house and make that the only money they can buy things for themselves with other than the daily essentials obviously but make it their responsibility to buy their own things that they want and that will teach them how to respect their things. they will learn the value of money and how much things cost and if they want it and it costs a lot I guarantee it if they buy it with their own money they will take care of it then they will start appreciating things
Maybe instead of things do an experience for the whole family of that child’s birthday choosing. Bring a small cake or cupcakes or have the family make a cake together.
We’ve are kinship foster and has had ours for going on three birthdays the first one we did small birthday party got everything for $20 and bought one toy and some outfits, the second one we went all out and spent a ton on party and gifts he loved both this year I’m debating a small little getaway for him
Time to make a stand as it sounds like they are edging toward beig spoiled rotten kids. Less giving and more helping others including you and you husband. Giving kids everything never works no matter your reasons.
Bring them on a trip and maybe have only one big gift and smaller ones with everything else. If they know they can always get tons of items, it won’t mean as much to them. It’s probably a little overwhelming to them to get so many things. I’d bring them somewhere, maybe help them donate or sell some of their toys, and kind of start over. Take them to the zoo, take them to go fishing, or wherever y’all want to go.
They are kids , trick them next year Don’t buy anything for them😱
Take the stuff away and make them earn it back by being responsible a by taking care of what they have left.
They know you have the stuff in your closet, so they don’t care. Throw the stuff in your car and tell them you are taking it to Goodwill or the dump. Find a place to store it out of their site. Leave them 1 or 2 toys only. Then on their birthday, get 1 item out of the bags and regift it to them. Don’t spend any money on them. You could also take them to some homeless shelters that houses families and let them give their toys to the kids there that don’t have any toys to play with because they have no home. Spending thousands on 7 & 8 year olds is not responsible - you are spoiling them too much.
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Thats just kids! There are a few perfect parents that say their kids are so great at it but i promise they are far and few between. Ive worked with hundreds.
Kids are rough and have no idea of value of items. Save the expencive gifts for when they are older and have learned to take better care of things.
Stop feeling gulilty. Before Covid it was 'because I don’t have enough time for her" our kids act spoiled because we spoil them.
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You have to role model how to take care of thing and remind them often till they get the hang of it. Ask them to pick it up or put it away when ever you see it un attended. They are little so tablets only on the kitchen table as it is too easy to break them.
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I’d first make sure something else isn’t going on. Kids express frustration this way over stuff they can’t or aren’t allowed to talk about. Maybe give them lessons of some sort like horseback riding or something like that instead. Hugs. Everyone is stressed and bored.
Instead of birthday gifts this year go and volunteer at a homeless shelter or women and children’s shelter.
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Mine does the same thing. What I started to do is when they break/loose something they have to pay for it with there own money. And if that means they have no money come vacation time or time to do something fun, or even buy that one thing they have been saving for. They will learn. It might just take them the hard way to do it.
Show them the present, leave it in the box where they can see it but they can’t touch it until they take better care of everything else
You answered your own question. Get them outfits and shoes. They more than got their fill for Christmas. As for what you got them already when they break it don’t replace it
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My kids were like that. To the point I’d spend $100s of dollars on something for them to tell me I didn’t want this. I’d threaten to take it back and they would literally hand it to me. Now on their birthdays I ask them 1 thing they want and they get that. If it’s 100 or more then they don’t get a party and if it’s less than 100 they can have a present and a party. They don’t get anything just bought for them anymore they have to buy it with their own money. They receive $10 a week in allowance and have chances to earn extra money if they ask. I also take away a quarter everytime they aren’t listening or catch an attitude when told or asked to do somethings and when they aren’t focused on school work. They usually make it to Friday with $6-$8. They have to save and earn everything they get until I see a change in their behavior.
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Sounds like you’re trying to do right by your kids, but they’re already entitled brats. My oldest especially went through this and I stopped getting her things unless it was a special occasion. I said I would strip away everything that’s a luxury and she knew I meant it. Still have problems sometimes, but draw a line and stick to it
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You never appreciate things til they are gone
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If I was you I would go get them like you said something that they really need a outfit shoes and maybe do a bday cake and that’s it since u did so much for them at Christmas and they don’t appreciate it then why do more that’s the only way you can reach kids it’s not being mean at all u have to teach them and stand up to them at one point and soon we is better than later
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This kind of behavior doesn’t happen overnight, but somehow it wasn’t noticed until Christmas?
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I’m old school so if they don’t appreciate what they have, take all the extras away and leave them with only necessities. If you don’t nip it in the bud now it will only get worse when they’re older.
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I have found that my kids ( similar ages) get overwhelmed and dont have the capability of taking care of too many things at once. We have started only buying a few things for holidays and birthdays. Less clutter in the house means more imagination and kids that are capable of taking care of the things that they have. Instead of wasting money on tons of things my husband and I take them to do stuff outside. We horseback ride, hike, sled, rollerskate, Ice skate, swim, all Depends on the season.
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If they cant take care of the items. You find them. Take it away. If they want it back. They have to do chores to earn it back.
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We did that one time and the next day they were arguing over a quarter mind you at the time 5 and 6 so we cut it down to 1 you want 1 you need 1 you wear 1 you read everything else came from grandparents and that put an end to the bickering and not taking care of things
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That’s a ridiculous Christmas load and absolutely overwhelming to an 8 year old. Without parents helping them manage it all how on earth are they just supposed to know. Especially if they’ve never experienced something like that. Their faces would have lit up on Christmas with HALF of that haul and you could have saved the other half for birthdays . If you don’t model moderation, how do they learn it? This was a mistake on your part. A Christmas like that was completely unnecessary and then expect them to know exactly how to handle it? 
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Don’t buy anymore toys or at least don’t throughout the year. I have an 8 year old daughter and I don’t buy her toys unless is Christmas and I don’t go the crazy on toys.
Keep doing what your doing keep buying them everything who cares if theyr ungrateful your the one wasting money so don’t waste time asking for help cos nothing we say is guna stop you buying them what they want 
You spent way too much and gave them way too much. It has no value to them if they think it isn’t something special.
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I’m sorry you’re going through this, sister. It can be difficult to teach kids to value the things they have. When my daughters were very small, we had “on” toys and “off” toys because there was so much abundance. It was difficult to keep track of everything. So I chose what on toys they would have for that month and put the off toys in a bin or box hidden away in my closet. It limited their access to over abundance, made it easier for cleaning up, and refreshed the toys in the house every few weeks so they didn’t get bored with the offerings. If anything got broken that my partner or I couldn’t fix, we explained lovingly that because of their carelessness or not being put away properly, it was not useable any longer and would go in the trash bin. This taught them that things can be broken if not cared for or put away in it’s proper place. These are some suggestions for how it worked for us. No judgement on your decision to provide an excellent Christmas, although maybe the kids are feeling overwhelmed with everything. I applaud your sacrifices during a difficult time. Much love💜
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I’m in the same boat. My kids didn’t get as much but got too much. They don’t seem to care. I’ve taken the big gift from 1. He doesn’t care even though it was what he wanted for months. I’ve put stuff into trash bags that they have to earn back by cleaning up. Doesn’t phase them. My kids were homeless with nothing. I thought that would teach them to appreciate what they are given. Didn’t happen. They’re expecting me to replace everything they lost. I’m at a loss.
When kids have too much they appreciate nothing, maybe they need more time doing things with their parents.
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stop giving if you have threatened no birthday gifts stand by it dont fix things for them and dont replace them they will learn when they have nothing and dont let them quilt trip you teach them
Take away there stuff so they know what they are going to missed and let them learn if they want something to earn in…in my opinion I wouldn’t get them anymore stuff at all. I would take away pretty much everything but what they need on the daily. They need to learn. Yes they are young but it’s possible to teach them to appreciate things. All my kiddos are young and all boys and understand and appreciate stuff. Even if it’s two gifts un expensive gifts they value them. I can buy them something for. The dollar store and we have it for over a year.
Become brats and spoiled? They apperantly already are. Stop threatening about throwing stuff away and do it. My kids break stuff they don’t get a new one. Period.
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It sounds like they need guidance and help, not punishment. Although you expect them to be responsible and appreciative, they clearly aren’t capable of that. It’s our jobs as parents to teach them that, which punishment doesn’t do. For example, my daughter is 3 and has a tablet. She knows it’s something that she has to ask for and when I notice she’s done with it, I pick it up and put it in the charger. I help set her up for success (not breaking the tablet) by not putting more responsibility on her than she is ready for.
Ignore all of these people lecturing you for spending too much. A lot of parents including us went overboard this past Christmas mainly because it was such a hard year. We felt that our daughter sacrificed so much due to covid. Friends, gatherings and celebrations, activities and sports. We wanted to reward her for handling it all so well so we went nuts at Christmas time. Her birthday is in a week. We still spoiled her. But mostly with things she needs. A new tv because the sound on the one she has now quit working, a pair of runners, tank tops, jammies, some outfits, and a couple toys. You could buy less though if you wanted but do things like we are, setting up a frozen yogurt bar so she can decorate with her favourite candy toppings, renting a movie of her choice, face mask and nail spa date, getting her hair styled (free by a friend) having a game centre and piñata. All of the fun could distract them from having less presents. I’m not here to judge whatever you decide.
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I’ve been there. As much as it hurts to see them cry you will have to be firm as this kind of behavior won’t change over night. My hubby and I opted to just buy them 1 set of clothes and shoes during birthdays and holidays. No toys except if it’s a gift from other people or relatives. Plus we keep an eye to the toys they receive. If we see that they take care of it and clean up after they’re done playing with it we let them be. If they’re aren’t we remind them right away and still gives them the chance. On third offense that’s when we take their toys and keep it away. We did that for a whole year. Now they are so much appreciative of everything they have and takes care of it. We still keep that kind of discipline. And if ever we buy toys for them we only buy them one each occasionally.
You are doing too much, spoiling them too much. Teach them responsibility by not just giving in to them. Teach them what it’s like not to have the luxury of being able to just get what they want. They’re at an understanding age
Volunteer. My kids engage with our community through various volunteer efforts ranging from preparing/serving food at shelters to collecting/donating items for children’s agencies. I think I’m going to have them make up some valentine’s to drop off at a local nursing home. Obviously covid has stunted some of our efforts, but volunteer opportunities are out there!
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If they want to play with something they have to “check it out” of the game closet. They have to return it in good condition if they want something else. It’s simple. They just don’t get everything at once.
In a way I domt disagree with you wanting to spoil them because of the virus and wanting them to enjoy xmas, but with spoiling them one year with so much you have to keep doing it because they will think Santa has brought them less next year I remember thinking this when I was little santa got me more last year and I’ve been good lol kids do think like this, and then you have the little friends that say what they got and they had so little but your kids got so much it hurts little kids thinking santa didnt spoil them, but as for the toys I’d just take them away and hide them somewhere where they dont know where they are and say I’m sending them back to santa if they arnt taken care of and you see one toy ruined after that take them away for a while and tell them to behave and santa will make his mind up if they can have them back as they took so long to make.
I’ve always told my children the value of money. Our children know they are spoilt, although my children also know that if they are disrespectful of their items…I’d happily give them to a more deserving child without a question asked.
Stop buying them a ton of stuff. You spoiled them. I spent 100 each at Christmas thos year. I shopped on sale and things they loved. They said it was the best Christmas ever
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Donate some of that stuff to the poor side of town.
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Take it all away. ALL of it. Give them a bed, pillows, blankets. Clothes for the week, shoes, and basic necessities. Everything else, they have to earn back. Chores, chores, chores. And as far as their birthdays, a home cooked meal, and and a home baked cake. Give them the basics until they work for their stuff back. When it’s gone then they will appreciate what they lost. My mom had to do this with my sister and I. But we did have to work for our stuff back. Don’t give them anything unless it’s earned.
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You are spoiling them, they obviously don’t appreciate the gifts, they don’t realize how much work it takes to earn the kind of money you spent. If they break a toy don’t replace it, if they won’t put it away sell it and put the money into a savings account to start a college fund. Also set a spending limit on birthdays and holidays keep it simple and not about the gifts the important thing is family and love, it sounds like you forgot that. My most treasured memories are times of playing with my mom’s hair and doing her make-up, camping with the family. We had some big Christmases but what made it special was time with family.
Stop buying for them. When you get much appreciate non. When you get few you appreciate. Your fault they don’t appreciate
I have always put a limit on how much I spend. This past Christmas was very hard. We spent 150 on each child (3) no one got anything really expensive. We choose to teach them to work for what they want. If they want something expensive then they gotta work for it. (Extra chores etc). My 9 year old broke her tablet her grandmother bought her and she had to buy a new one from her own money. She ended up saving enough to buy a better one. It has taught them to appreciate what they have. Just like when they become of age for driving I will buy them a junker but they will fix it up. Make them put the work into it.
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If you have tried all the things you’ve said, and it hasn’t worked, then make good on your promise not to get them anything for their birthdays. You tried the reasonable route, sounds like they want or need the tough love approach.
If it was me they would be spending their birthdays volunteering with kids way less fortunate than themselves. Perspective would be their gift. Which hopefully will last for their entire lives.
Another approach would be to put them to work. They want something they’re gonna have to learn how to make a dollar.
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Honestly stick to the outfit and shoes. And the same with this Christmas, Easter etc. until they can look after what they have
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The more money you spend the more they don’t appreciate
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Maybe instead of buying them something you do a staycation. You find something in your town or a town or two over to have a day of fun. Like going to a Zoo or dinner and a movie. I don’t know where your state is in restrictions. But during the summer my GF and I decided to do a staycation went up to the bigger city near us and rented a hotel room with a hot tub in it so we didn’t have to go down to the community pool and then we got massages and a nice dinner. You could do that may be a mani pedi Instead of a massage. It sounds like they are a little more sporty though so maybe like a tramplene park or something. Give them an experience they can remember with them so you don’t have to worry about it breaking or not being taken care of it will be a memory for them of a special time they got to do something fun with their parents for a day. Maybe if funds permit one friend can come too to enjoy the fun for birthday weekend.
Yeo i have a 6 and 7 year old exactly like that and needless to say they have lost video game privileges tv rights everything. They get to come home from school clean and sit on the couch doing nothing. Bc they think they are entitled to everything and then they are never grateful for anything they get. Keep it mama. Stick to your guns you got this
Children are egocentric, meaning they are incapable of seeing things from someone else’s point of view. They are also impulsive and have a hard time understanding long term consequences. The best way they learn consequences is naturally. They broke a toy, well now they can’t play with it anymore, and they will eventually learn to be more careful with their stuff since it’s not replaceable. It’s really that simple. No need to take things away or find elaborate ways to punish them, because you’re then putting unrealistic expectations on them. When you give other adults gifts, do you tell them “if I don’t like how you treat your gift, I’m not going to buy you anything in the future”? … we all break things, we all make mistakes, so try not to take it so personal.
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Do exactly what you said. Outfit & shoes. Because if you’ve already talked to them about it and then posted this, then the talk obviously didnt work.
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They don’t need all that extra stuff anyways
Sounds like you e already made them spoiled brats. That’s hard to undo, I’m working on figuring things out with my son who is doing the same and expects something every single time we leave the house. It’s a struggle. I can’t believe how fast he turned into this little monster. Good luck, but I think your right to plan something else besides gifts for a birthday. I took my older daughter to volunteer at our local food locker at thanksgiving timeone year, it really changed her perspective and helped her to appreciate life and what she has.
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stop the threat to throw things away… ur teaching them to do exactly what they’re doing, not giving things value. have u thought maybe they’re just not interested in a “big christmas” since this is not what they’re used to? kids don’t need a bunch of stuff for christmas and they just confirmed that for u. on their bdays spend ur money wisely or just ask them to pick a couple of things they wd like and just help them take care of it by showing them how to do it
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When I was a kid if I acted like that my dad would put it in a paper bag and “throw” it on the fire in front of me (he used a fake bag to throw on the fire and kept the stuff hidden elsewhere) we’d get upset and learn to look after things we wanted. Maybe explain to them how lucky they are and that other people don’t get anything at all. Even going through old toys in ok condition but not played with with them to donate to children who have nothing might make them be more grateful for what they have x
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Spoil your kids with love not materialistic items. Bake together, cook, play with them, go out for walks, go for a bike ride, a car ride, go gaze at the stars, camp in the backyard, amd so forth. There are many things you can do with your child. Giving them memories is so much better than any material item. Take them for a safely planned trip vring extra hand sanitizer if you’re worried. Spoil them to a trio to the zoo, kid playzone, or trampoline park. Raise your children by giving them lessons/ experiences your parents showed you. Instead of getting them items you never had. I guarantee you when you begin to make an effort your kids will learn to appreciate your thought in trying to bond with them. Not shut them up with activities to do that don’t include/ bother you. Be the best parent you can be, don’t fall into the lazy routine our parents raised us on. Yes we are ALL tired, taking a day off isn’t bad. But when its consitently happening take a look at yourself
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Don’t give them a dang thing make them clean the house and then don’t give them anything because if they are like that at this young age imagination how they ate going to be later in life smh they don’t deserve nothing until they see what they ate taken advantage of
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Take all their shit away, stop buying them shit, dont take the phones, but take the chargers. And make them work to get any of it back
And why do a 7 and 8 year old have phones???
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Pack them all up and donate them to the poor
It must be very frustrating for you 
have you heard of super nanny? I saw a video clip of an episode where the parents were struggling with their daughter being “spoiled” and “ungrateful” and just not listening to them so the nanny had them all volunteer at a homeless shelter to help with lunch and it was a really good lesson for the girl to appreciate what she has because there are others that are less fortunate and would be so happy to have a fraction of what she has. Maybe something like that would help with your daughters taking care of their things? Good luck mama 
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Children now days doesn’t know the value of a dollar. They always expect things because us parents give in to their every want. I have 5 and they are all spoiled rotten!There is a point an were we have to have tough love make them pick a few of their things to give to less fortunate children, it will change their outlook I promise.
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7 and 8 year old are to young for most of those things
Let them be kids , there is a reason they have age guide lines.
Don’t impress yourself or your family . Get them things they can be kids with .
What did you have at those ages … board games , coloring books and colors , barbies , baby dolls .
Bikes .
These are the ages you teach them responsibility not give responsibility. They are kids.
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I feel like saying they’re spoiled is out of line since you clearly were just trying to make this particular Christmas special… anyways, I would go the route of taking it all away and have them earn it back. As for the upcoming birthdays, maybe focus on a couple things they need and try to plan a really fun family day.
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Spend a day organizing everything with them and set expectations for afterwards. They are old enough to understand its partly their responsibility to take care of their stuff. Its a lot easier for kids to know where things go if you make them help and if everything has a spot. For their birthdays I would get them each an outfit and shoes like you said and tell them that if they can continue picking up their mess then they can earn 1 birthday gift a piece
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I’d getttt them just the outfit n shoes n then after their birthday explain why!!
I started to have this same problem n I do this very thing!!!
Too much for kids so young. They are overwhelmed with it all. Put most of it up! Most kids don’t take care of their stuff on their own. They have to be taught and there has to be a place to put it. Be specific and label things; like shelves; cubby spaces, tubs etc. But put the most of it away and only bring out a toy when they’ve learned how to take care of what do have. Instead of buying them a gift for their birthday do something fun with them!
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My daughter has 5 bins of toys for her 2 year old and they change them out weekly so she doesn’t get so overwhelmed. Every week she gets a different bin.
Do you follow threw? If you say your taking it and their not getting it back follow threw. It is most important to show you mean what you say.
Happy birthday and tell more responsible a simple birthday maybe an outfit a pair of shoes maybe a book and I love like someone suggested more or one-on-one time or just you and your spouse and one child get a babysitter for the other child just focus on that one child I know a covid is harder but maybe pedicure. maybe spending more time doing things together read books at bedtime teach him how to cook help them help you bake decorate cookies. kids want your time and attention more than anything they don’t want toys as much as they try to make you think they do. In the meantime they don’t get to watch a TV show or they don’t get to get on the tablet and tell their room is picked up or whatever small assignment you give them is done start a chore chart if they get five stars they can either earn something that you’ve taken away back or get a treat or something it’s pretty simple stuff that everything is you and your husband have to be 100% consistent if you buckle they’ll figure that out and they’ll use it every time from now to the end of their days. I also agree too much stuff is overwhelming maybe let them pick out some of the things they don’t like or don’t really want to play with anymore and help them take it somewhere to be donated. Hang in there when your kids are more responsible and you’re not so stressed out you’ll find out that kind of walking through this process will help you immensely as well as simplify things for them too
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My girls went thru a period like this and I tried everything. So I spoke to the police dept just to see if I did this 1 thing if I would get in trouble for child abuse or something stupid like that. Anyways I got to the point I cleaned everything out of there rooms, and when I say everything I mean everything they even lost their rooms. They had a pallet of blankets to sleep on in my room. That’s it. And when they decided they wanted to start acting right they had things they needed to do and accomplish to start earning things back and not just doing stuff in our house but out in the community for other people who didnt have much. Needless to say I had to do that once and that was it. After that never had a problem again.
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I would empty their rooms of everything. Every toy every electronic…everything. put it away and then take them to a shelter to volunteer. Kick this behavior in the butt. They need to understand how much people don’t have out there. People that have nothing except the meal that’s being served by you children. I would then make then pick something of there stuff to donate to those less fortunate. Then if they want there stuff back they will…work for it by performing house hold chores understanding that these chores are about keeping a clean and structured home. Your raising people that need to understand how to take care of themselves and be grateful for what they have also to realize the sacrifices others have made for them.
Do Adventure presents since it sound like they have to much stuff … fun times make great memories
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I have felt like this with my husband. He always wants to get unnecessary things for our kids at Christmas and most of it never gets used. I tell him we give way to much and it is unappreciated. I would scale back a lot. You can spend the day with them go get your nails done have lunch allow them to pick out one thing from the store or better yet give them a gift card to a store have a cake with them and call it a day.
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Bag it up and give all that shit to the less fortunate. There are ppl who are way worse off, and these girls are old enough to know this! If u don’t appreciate it, someone else will! Spoiled ass kids today! 
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Thats the problem. They dont respect the gifts you worked hard to provide. The toys and gifts get put away until they learn the value of the gift!
They are spoilt, try punishing them and don’t get them any gifts until that attitude changes
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Dont make empty threats, if you say you will take it away then do that. I would scale way back, too much is overwhelming. Its not too late to help them learn responsibility in taking care of their things. If you take something you might want to have them earn it to get it back. As far as their birthdays try doing something to make memories instead of focusing on gifts. Special breakfast, go somewhere they enjoy, watch a favorite movie, the time you spend with them will be remembered long after the toy is gone.
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I raised 3 sons , one Year for Christmas I rewrapped the toys they were not taking care of that I had put up into the closet and when they opened it the look of surprise on their face was priceless but indeed they were happy to get their toys back seem to be lesson learned:heavy_heart_exclamation:
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You are spoiling them! Do they do chores? Do you hold them accountable for their actions? They break something, tough luck. They do without. Better start now or you are going to have out of control teenagers. Don’t just hand them whatever they want.
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Honestly I wouldn’t get them anything for their birthday. There’s a chance they don’t take you seriously when you say that you won’t get them anything. My little brother was and still is the same way, didn’t get anything for his birthday and he started to get the hint
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At Christmas you gave way to much. Think about getting something that all of you can do. Pool, just bikes for everyone so you can do things together. There are so many things that you can get. Buying so many gifts and spending all that money on them does make them spoiled. Also makes them not appreciate what they get. The may act disappointed but you are doing best for them in long run. If you really want to teach them, take some things they have and donate them to kids who have nothing. So many families can’t even afford much to eat.
Tough love works. Better to do it now, as when they are older they are the more difficult
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If u say no gifts then u make sure they get no gifts. If u threaten them but dont follow through they wont take u serious. My son was like that at 4 i took away ALL toys tv, tablet, no junk foods like candy, cookies etc. he had nothing but books for a full week 7days. Let me tell u after them 7 days he was and angel and still is. When he trys to act out i remind him what happened last time.