You will get a payment for you and the baby put yourself in a woman’s shelter ….
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That is financial abuse. Go get yourself a job, tell your ex you can not survive on nothing, move out with your child. After a month of working put your son into childcare or school. After another month start looking for rentals in your budget. Can be 1 bedroom or 2. Whilst still living there only provide cleaning for you and your son. If the chickens die it is not your fault. If there are no clean dishes it is not your fault! If no one has clean laundry it is not your fault!!! You and your son are the number 1 priority!
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Great friends don’t treat each other like that😰
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This is the weirdest arrangement ever, first of all…
If there is any way you can WFH, get on CVS Careers (sorry can’t post link lest I be flagged by FB) and put in for the Aetna call center. There are literally 40,000 jobs listed company wide. (I work on the CVS side of the house.) Those are usually job grade 105 and don’t require a whole lot of experience. He’s laid off and its not really time to be picky, money is money and it doesn’t matter who earns it.
Second, what kind of chickens are those? If they’re Road Island Reds or they make brown eggs, they’re worth their weight in gold. I’d take the eggs as my payment for caring for the chickens, they’re full of protein and would be very healthy for your son. I have 2 RIRs and love my girls. 
They’ll also eat ANYTHING, if you got stale cereal, tomatoes with bad spots or even just kitchen cuttings and leftovers, chickens won’t let it go to waste. My girls jump up and down when they see me coming, they know I’m gonna feed them some good food and they reward me.
I think your ex is an @$$ and if there is any way you can make a “mad fund” or go home to your mom/dad, something- you should. And WTF was up with him letting your ex sis in law on your side stay there? I just think he’s an @$$ and the tampon business bothers me.
I haven’t been out in 4 I feel you girl.
Get a part time job to start off with. He has no authority to tell you not to. That puts some money in your pocket and to buy pads and shampoo. The basics. It’ll get you out a for a few hours. It’ll be easier when your son is 5 and is in school all day. He has to carry some weight with your child. He can’t abuse you and keep you from working. That is called financial abuse. Get those wheels going somehow.
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And apply for food stamps and medical insurance at least. For you and your son.
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Well no I bet your ex won’t be you work while he is laid off work as that will mean that you as a person will be able to turn around and do the same horrific things what he does and your ex is controlling you as a person as he wants to be in control of every little thing he can possible have that control over you . Myself personally I would find myself a well good paid job and my own home and get the heck from your ex and also take your child with you as well as your ex partner behaviour is way out of control as a woman myself is women also need toiletries like personal thing’s what every woman has to have for no fault of her own as it’s all woman’s nature calling and your ex sounds like a very very serious control freak to me he want’s that control over you get from and go out and make yours and your child dreams and wishes all come true for your self . All what you doing is cook and clean and everything else for your ex and everybody else’s well well think about yourself and your child and put your self and your child first before any man and whoever else’s as like you have said that you haven’t got many clothes what does fit you and you don’t want to answer your ex for money to go out and get some for your self well why not ??? It would be really really nice and being thought off if your ex turns around and says to you oh come here and gives you some money and tell’s you to go and get your self a nice dress or something nice to wear as he wants to take you out for dinner as a friend and say thank you for all the nice and wonderful things you do in our home for your ex and child and everybody else’s he has just invited to come and live underneath your roof as well as his . He is moaning that you don’t pay your way around the home well sorry yes you do who does all the chores in your home ok he mite buy the groceries and the cleaning products ect but how much time and effort you as a human being take to clean up that home and cook and also take care of yours and his child while he’s just sitting around like a slob doing nowt to help you so i would also remember him he mite have the money and he mite pay for the bill’s and the cleaning products and the groceries and other things but what about for your time 2 keep cooking and cleaning and everything else’s you have to do including looking after your and his sweet child as well . Your ex need a reality check what is basically in front of him and how much you also do around the home for him as it’s can also possibly cost him a lot more for a cleaner and cook and a nanny to take care of yours and his child to come in2 yours and his home so i would personally give him your bill to him also for what you do around the home as honestly darling he’s taking the average of you massive time i would either boot him out or go and find myself a job and my own home for myself and my child and I would pack up our thing’s and off we shell go and I would never never return back that would be my second opinion this as I would give him my bill what I so do around the home for him and yours child and those other people who he’s invited to move in and by the sounds of it he didn’t even spoken to you about it he just made up his own mind up on it which again it’s wrong as I honestly don’t think he’s even bothered and he doesn’t even respect you as a person which my heart is also broken in trillions peace for you and your child with the way he is badly abused you both well I hope and pray that you will be able to get the help and happiness you and your child definitely do deserve and you both will also be in my thoughts and prayers all my love
I read the whole thing at the end where you said you want to leave but don’t know if your son will be taken care of got me
You are his caregiver and you don’t just leave your son like that get help for you and him and get away
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He’s using and mentally abusing you not letting you work because he know you’ll pack your shit and leave him
Well, sounds like you need to get a job. 
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You are being taken advantage of and controlled. I hope you can get out. Apply for housing assistance and other things to help get ya on your feet. You can do it.
I walked away from a similar situation.
The first thing you will meet when you leave is fear… nod and keep going!!
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Thats not a “great friend”.
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Can you move into a family member’s hide? You need to stand up for yourself and your son! Him not providing your personal needs is beyond ridiculous! You need to leave!
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“he won’t let me work” He is getting his cake and eating it too!! 
Dear God when you can get in a position to leave don’t hesitate!!!
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Goto get help. Take your son and move out. Your county health department can help you get the help you need
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…what business is it of his whether you get a job. You’re not together.
Get your kid and go to a women’s shelter because honey this is financial abuse, they will help you find a place to live and help you find work.
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He isn’t stopping you. He can’t stop you from working or wanting to do anything. You need to get a job, put your son in childcare, and go up from there. I’ve been a single mother of 2 for 5 years now and have always made it happen for us even at the lowest of points. Sometimes when we’re coming from nothing, harder things seem so far away but they’re much more closer than you think with just taking one small step forward. Don’t doubt yourself, you can do it.
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go to Community Action, they will help.
Interested… what can you cook? Do u also do the outside jobs??
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My motto is if my kids can speak up and tell me if something is wrong, they are old enough to be in daycare and or with a babysitter. 4 years old is old enough in my opinion. Get a job girlfriend. If he kicks u out or demands money go to a safe shelter with your son and do the exact same thing your doing now except your doing it for u and your son not anyone else. There’s 0 reason why you have to wake up everyday and feel the weight of the world on your shoulders. The world is scary and it’s a whole new life outside of what you got going on now but I promise u honey it’s worth it. Don’t be that mom that made excuses and stayed just because. Be the mom you want to be and say goodbye to the abusive pieces of shit that are using u to do all the things that matter. They are emotionally abusing u by taking advantage of what you don’t have to allow u to feel like you have stability. It’s bullshit. Leave.
Thats not great friends…
Leave him and take your son with you. Go find help from the state
Make a plan and get out. Figure out money…is there somewhere in your community can get help? I pray for you 
If you are divorced you should be getting child support after he gets a job leave him and file for child support!!!
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File child support on him, file for food stamps & anything else. Get on your feet & kick him to the curb.
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Sorry for saying it like this but grow some balls and get the hell out of there…
Your son is 4,maybe try looking for free preschools in your area? It’s called headstart where I live.
If you can secure child care you hopefully can find a job within walking distance and start there. Good luck mama 
🫶🏻 there’s nowhere to go but up from here
Go for child support ,get a law income apartment, food stamps n , medicad. Also trying calling social security administration. See if you can qualify for some income till them your going to be homeless n ,your son . My friend was going to be homeless n ,they denied her three times n then got a lawyer n ,fought it n ,won.
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Do you have a friend you can vent to, because you sound like you’ve thought of options and freedom is awaiting you. Outside of that world your choosing to stay in. Welcome to call me if you like on msgener. So we can get some action started toward living your best life again. Xx
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He’s your EX! Why are you letting him tell you what to do? Leave that place on a Jett plane!!!
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Seems like you have 2 children.
You need help babe
And I pray you find somewhere to go ASAP. 
I WISH I WAS CLOSER TO HELP YOU OUT WITH Hand ME DOWN STUFF/ PADS CLOTHES SO ATLEAST YOU COULD FEEL LIKE A TRUE WOMAN SHOULD.
seek a shelter for help take you’re son and leave.
You have no family who can help you get out of that mess?
Sweetie I don’t know what state you live in , but you do have options if you really want out(with your child) . I don’t want to say all here , but if you would like to send me a dm on msg’s I would really like to help you find the help you need to get away and be happy and safe. You really sound like you need a helping hand. You and your son are NOT in a good place right now. I know it’s easy for everyone to say leave him or kick him to the curb, but when you don’t have resources or a plan , it’s hard to leave.
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It’s sad…Have Faith and trust in God.The Lord will sow u the way
I’m literally going through some similar things! Have you tried to apply for government child care?
Find a Womens Shelter and take your child there and they will help you find a Program where you can work and help Yourself and Your Child and stay away from the guy that is trying to enslave You !
How does he pay the rent/ mortgage on the house? Or is it paid off. Stay at home mums do all that, but they are able to access the shared account that their husbands income goes into to pay for all the family expenses, including things she needs, and things she wants. Make a total of how many hours in a week you are doing cooking/ cleaning/ child care/ pet care/ other household errands/ grocery shopping/ all the truth that you do in that house. Then work out how much it would cost for him to pay someone to cook, clean, babysit, buy and deliver groceries, run errands per hour. And times the hourly rate of that job, by how many hours a week you do. You’ll be surprised how much it is. And that’s what he should be paying you for all the hard work you do, which would cover your own expenses and leave you with a lot more money than you have now - which is, none. Don’t let him undervalue the work you do - and the things you are experienced in and could be getting paid to do for other people. Don’t kid yourself, there’s no benefit to living with him- and he’s making sure that you don’t even have tampon money because you might stash it away so you can get away from him. He doesn’t look after you. You’re being treated like a slave, told your work only covers the cost for your accommodation and food, you can’t afford to escape, and never getting any money so you can’t save it up so you can leave. That’s f’d up. It sounds like you have given up because of something called Learned Helplessness, and that you have Codependency issues. https://youtu.be/gG2pyWQZAMY
If you live in us apply for government housing food stamps Medicaid child support etc
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Gosh I just want to hug you!! I thought this was in one of my local facebook groups and was going to ask if you could DM me so I could help you with some things! I was in a very similar situation 6 years ago and now I’m living the life I dreamt of. There is hope. Please feel free to PM me if you want to talk or vent and I can try to help you from afar!!
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I have a few questions, do you do the grocery shopping or does he he do that?, has he told you not to buy sanitary products or clothes and did he prevent you from doing so before you separated from the bedroom, I’m only asking because I just can’t fathom why he’d prevent you from staying clean and clothed considering you clam to be great friends and co parent really well, it just doesn’t make much sense.
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Also co dependency. Tane your boy and start over !
Give him a bill for all the things you do eg . Cook £250 per week . Cleaner 150 a week . And so on then see if he still thinks you live there rent free
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Fuck him take control of your life quietly apply for job at a daycare or any job and move even if it’s an efficiency apartment.
Girl I stopped reading at “I do all” honey child!!! Life is short. He is telling you that you’re lucky??? To be taking care of multiple kids?? Are you lucky to not have a life?? Baby girl, get a job put as much money as side as you can and gtfo!!
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I’d kick his ass and get child support that’s why he’s living there so he doesn’t have to pay he’s just using you I wouldn’t put up him and his family at all and get those chickens off your property it’s not your place to take care some dumb people. Your son is your main subject. Your ex is a bum .
Just take control your in charge
You need to get custody of your children kick that man out and learn to stand on your own two feet seems a little harsh and it is a little hard but once the ball gets rolling you’ll be motivated in so many ways
Get out!!! And live your life
He’s using you
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Time to go hun, you ARE being used IMO
That child is old enough to be in sxhool, get a job WITH the school district. Get the child registered for pre-K, and get a job at the school, maybe start at the cafeteria. There will be a church or women center to help you with a dress for success. If you DM me your location I will gladly help you find help in your area.
If he isn’t working, how does he oay the bills?
Do you get Food stamps?
Do you have a custody agreement?
You said y’all co parent well together? If that is the case, how/when does he do the parenting? You might just need to walk out, leave the child. Go fo an hour. Will he make sure the child is safe? If no, then you don’t co parent. If the answer is yes, then start taking back your control.
Bring your son and get a job… leave that man! Wherever you go don’t leave your son…keep on praying
He won’t let you get a job? Why does he have any say? You aren’t a couple.
You are letting yourself be abused.
Get ahold of Health and Human Services and apply for everything. Including housing.
Go to a Domestic Abuse shelter. They will help you.
All I am going to say here is you enjoy happiness too. You will never be able to enjoy life truly until you break down the walls and barriers preventing you from that happiness.
Momma don’t lever ur child but look into a woman’s and children shelter they can help u he is definitely taking advantage of u
Get a job! Being a mother doesn’t mean you can not work! Get a job and start saving and move on!