Unfortunately you’re doing all you can. I’m a kid who literally grew up expierencing just that starting around the age of 7. Hell it’d be years inbetween me and my dad talking, by his choice. Except I loved my dad no matter how little he wanted to be apart of my life and I think that made it even more difficult to deal with for myself and my mother, so while it may be hard on her it could be even more difficult if she actually liked him. (There where also a lot of other factors in my life that lead to my mental illnesses, not because my dad didn’t want to be apart of my life so don’t let some comments scare you that she’s going to be damaged for life. I feel like since she already knows he’s a waste of time she’s going to be one tough nut to crack as an adult) He had every other weekend supervised visits, which mind you supervised visits do not have to be in a court like setting/building. It can literally be at your grandparents house (like mine was at my dad’s mother’s house) My grandma was the supervisor. So if the grandparents are the ones that want to be apart of her life then have them deemed the supervisors for the visits and if he doesn’t show up or stay, oh well, they’re the ones who actually want to see her anyways. If for some reason they can’t be the supervisors then express to the court that the father has very little interest in being apart of her life but the grandparents do so you’d like to arrange visitation for them. Maybe they can talk with the father and see if he can’t sign off his rights as I’m assuming he’s getting racked up for child support(?).
And to those who enjoy commenting “tHiS iS wHy YoU sHoUlDn’T hAvE kIdS wItH lOsErS” let’s get this straight. Some of you turn into losers as soon as you have to face one ounce of responsibility. Some losers become drug addicts for reasons that have nothing to do with their family and become unrecognizable. Some promise to give all that they have until the time comes then magically it’s not what they wanted. Some never wanted to be a parent and got forced into it, should’ve thought about wearing some protection and thought about who you where going to be sleeping with then so the possible chance of responsibility doesn’t turn you into another deadbeat loser. Some of you claim to be the best choice and then you turn out to be abusive fucks or cheaters. I know a lot of baby mommas aren’t perfect, but you don’t get to always blame the women for every loser father as its not always in our control as people are always changing so it’s not fair to judge that they where a piece of shit before having kids with them. My dad was great before and a while after, then he became a drug addict for reasons that have nothing to do with our family. Hardly know who he is now. Wouldn’t have said he’s a loser then but I can say he is now.
This is gross. There are so many fathers who would love a few hours and he just leaves her or doesn’t take them at all? I’d say if she’s having a good time with the grandparents, let her keep going but make sure it’s known by your lawyer and judge that HE isn’t seeing her and how many times he missed etc. don’t take her from her grandparents but definitely keep a note of dad missing etc.
Document this in a notebook. However the child should not suffer this. Make memories with her yourself or grandparents but make the most of it
Build her support group around those that want to be in her life including his parent’s
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I’d say ask judge to stop his visitation all together. Let grandparents take her and enjoy her. Without him
It’s apparent!! It takes a real man to be a father. I wouldn’t fret over it. Love n peace to you!
Let him be. Live your life focus on the well being of your daughter. Life will put everything in its place. Good luck 
He is punishing you. Ignore him. Tell your daughter she can call your hubby dad. A ND YOU IGNORE HIM.Stop trying to make her love her father
Leave him be…obliviously he doesn’t deserve her, and she’s better off without him
Sounds like grandparents are the driving force behind him and if it wasnt for them he wouldn’t even get his daughter. Talk to grandparents and make your own arrangements with them. One weekend a month or something for them. And once they are satisfied it will be easy to stop doing the forced visitation schedule.
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File to terminate his parental rights.
Maby have her Wright a letter to the court
Document document and document. Then take him to court to terminate his brights.
If he doesn’t show be thankful.
Then if he dont want to can make it stop period
Documentation and present to Judge yourself. If you have a GAL have them speak on this
I learned after my divorce that the one thing that people don’t discuss or recognize are the dad’s emotional struggles. I bawled every time I took my kids back to their mom. Good 10 minutes of sobbing. I was depressed for several days after they left…(still am…but…I’ve learned to deal.) That being said…there were times I thought how much easier it would be to disappear. Then…I wouldn’t hurt so much…but…I figured out…the kids would blame themselves and wouldn’t be able to understand that dad loved them so much…but left because it was easier on him.
That being said. I know not every deadbeat dad cares…but…not every deadbeat dad doesn’t. No one can say what is happening in his heart. …and you people judging others should take that into consideration before passing said judgment.
Document how much time was offered and how much of that he actually spent with her, it has to be a few months of him doing this though, then petition the court stricter court orders for visitation, give him the opportunity to follow the schedule, and if he still doesn’t, follow up with the court and motion for the judge to revoke his parental rights.
Well. On the one hand your daughter will have great memories of her grandparents. Talk to a lawyer and see what rights your daughter has since her father can’t bothered to see her. He is in contempt every time he dodges her weekends with him
Sad part is you are doing all that you can. Seems like she already has a dad. Some men it’s easy to move on and think that their absence doesn’t do anything to a child. We all know that isn’t true. At least in the end you can say that you tried to let him be a father. But maybe the best gift he’s giving her is his absence.
Go to court and get a new order for grandparents rights for your kiddo and ask in return that he either sign rights away or tell his parents that he doesn’t want to be a father… It allows the grandparents to be sure they have relationship with grandchild and can get the “sperm donor” essentially out of the way… His parents have probably told him not to sign away his rights for fear of losing access to the child… I bet if you make arrangements that suit them and you things will work out better… Who knows maybe he just isn’t ready yet it happens… Either way keep the lines open with your child in case they want to get to know their dad better if he ever decides to be one…
You can do nothing. Her not liking him is her feeling his rejection- it has nothing to do with you. I do appreciate that you let her visit her grandparents- she will remember that.
I’d ask her what she wants. If she wants to see bio dad, let her- when he is available (ugh, I know)
But if she is fine without seeing him, make that the normal. Kids aren’t stupid, they know who they want in life. Don’t force it.
It sounds like that this father just does not care…period. He’s barely there for the court supervised visits, his parents have to do his parenting for him. How much time going to pass before he turns around & discovered that his daughter is not around when he’s going to need her the most…she’ll be long gone from his life & call her stepfather “dad”, doing all the “dad” stuff such as seeing her off to college, walking her down the aisle, the father/daughter dance while her biological father’s parents are there every step of the way while this father is not around. It would be too late for him.
Focus on the best part…the grandparents & stepfather are doing a great job for their caring & nurturing environment.
Get his parents to knock some sense into him then. See if you can get the court to grant GPs his visitation since hes not gonna use it and truly doesnt give a damn. Also RECORD AND DOCUMENT EVERYTHING. Every missed visit, unanswered text, everything your daughter says about not wanting to see him. DOCUMENT IT ALL!
His relationship with his daughter is his business. You have no control over it as much as you would love to be in charge
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you can NOT force a child to “love her dad”- because he ISN’T- he’s the sperm donor- speak with this dead-beats parents- perhaps THEY can ‘take over’ his time & he can join them if he so pleases, but it doesn’t leave your child hanging- STOP trying to force love- it isn’t working! Otherwise, ignore him- & have something planned to distract her from the FACT he’s not there - again- personally- I’D be telling her the truth- he’s unreliable, which is why we don’t live with him in the 1st place & YOU are a smart girl for realizing what we have here @ home is better than anything he has to offer! ~
The sperm donor doesn’t deserve your daughter’s love.
Document each time he doesn’t show up or whatever. Keep all the evidence for like a year then take the matter back to court and ask for full custody, as he’s letting your daughter down
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I think it is wonderful that you have a good relationship with his parents…since he is a father in Abstentia…Let her continue to go with them for fun times…and there will come a time that he will come to regret it…Does he pay Child support? If not make sure the court knows it…You cannot force him to be there for your daughter…She is 8 and can figure it out…that he would rather have more fun elsewhere…Does she like her grandparents ? Hopefully she does …and can be loving with them…that she is not getting from her father…It may never change…but you cannot force her…and cannot really force your ex…but he is missing out…for sure…Don’t speak negative of him…(know that must be hard)…and keep things positive with his parents…so she has some connection…
Since it’s court ordered you can report him to the judge, and have him held in contempt and don’t give up until someone does something. Otherwise you’re doing all you can. You can’t personally make him do anything he’s not willing to do.
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Pleased she has a relationship with her grandpatents. Not their fault their son is stupid. You cant fix or change stupid. Hes not her real dad he is one of her biological parents. A father is much more than what he is.
It’s good that his parents are loving towards her. Her father is doing this himself and one day she won’t have anything to do with him. Very sad! Don’t plan her Dad weekends anymore. Tell him to see her at his parents house.
Kids have a way of knowing everything going on. If he chooses not to be in her life, than he will reap what he sows. She’s old enough to see what he’s doing and the sad part is she will rather have your husband walk her down the isle some day. His loss, don’t force her to spend time with him, if he don’t want it. Her grandparents will be there for her always. As well as you and your husband. Just support her in every way.
Keep records of all text messages and missed appointments. After it is accumulated take it to court and get his rights taken away
Sorry but the issue here is that women don’t pick the right men to have kids with and this is the outcome, if people report me then your just mad at the truth.
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Try to get the court to end the visitation orders and let him contact you and your husband when he wants to, and of course when its inconvenient you will obviously tell him no and rightfully, if he wants to pay child support for a child he doesn’t want to see that’s on him.
You don’t need us to tell you. Go back to the court for revised visitation.
Stop trying. . Deadset. . If he wanted to see his kid he will ask. . No he shouldn’t have to sign his rights away. Still his kid.
Cut him off. Make sure she dumps him in an abusive care home to rot when he’s old.
Angela Nicole this sounds familiar!
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Don’t force her! Trust her feelings. I pushed my daughter (who was the biggest daddy’s girl) to continue a relationship with him after our divorce. His disinterest and neglect seriously impacted her self esteem. If her step dad is a loving influence, foster that relationship. Hopefully her stupid father will come around. My ex never did. Good luck 
GOD can change the hardest of hearts…go to Him in prayer. Pray earnestly. I’ll pray with you.
Thank God for his parents
People should think before they decide to have kids with losers
Coming from a guy in a similar situation he probably hates having to see his daughter while underneath a thumb.
You let this guy cum in you!?!?
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Just…
Think through the consequences before you do anything. It definitely crappy. But if the grandparents are there for the child, I wouldn’t mess with the time they get. I’m sure they’re disappointed too.
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If it supervised then it have to been documented by who ever supervises and then court decision will come from those documentation
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He barely gets to see the child. A few hours every other weekend is not enough. He never gets to take her anywhere. No wonder the child doesn’t want to be around him. Can’t you and him take the child to the zoo together or something ?
Maybe its his turn to have custody and you can try jumping hoops.
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All you can do is document him not showing up. Do not change the visitation schedule to suit his needs of going to the beach. If he wanted to see her he would have been there.
I’m kind of curious as to why he has supervised visitations. It’s usually not a good indicator that he’s a good father.
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I haven’t been with my ex for 12 years, since my daughter was 4. To this day he still disappoints her. He didn’t want to see her on fathers day. Turns up 4 hrs late if he takes her anywhere or doesn’t turn up at all. When she was little at primary school her didn’t pick her up because he was in Lorne on a date and left her sitting outside the school for ages before he contacted me to go pick her up.
Without any prompting from me she now knows he is unreliable and not someone she can count on in her life.
It’s very sad and I get so upset for her but it will never change.
In my opinion you should just make her life as good as you can without including him too much because it is just more times for her to be hurt. Include his family if they want but don’t expect anything from him.
Well if his parents are so good Jeep the appointments cos they love her too nit sure what happened that he had to be moved to supervised visits but you say his behaviour started from the order being told your nkt allowed rd your daughter without supervising means the world doesn’t trust you and your a danger to her that starts to play on your own mind and you think it in your own head and you stay away
Don’t be petty. Let him see her when he wants to. At least he wants to. You can’t MAKE him do anything.
Your daughter is of the age where the courts will listen to what she wants
Go back to the court’s and you can get anything you want once cos talks to your daughter
You’re doing all you can. My daughter is 12 and she gave up on her dad. It sucks because that is her dad. But we have been split up since she was 4 and he has done nothing but mentally drain her. He is in jail again and this time she did not ask me to put money on his books so he can call. I asked her if she wanted me to and she said “no, I don’t think you should have to take care of him anymore. He did this to himself” moral of the story: your child grows up, they see the other parent for who they really are. Don’t worry about it. And don’t force it.
Talk with his parents about your concerns. In the meantime fathers often don’t know what to do with little girls - this is NOT letting him off the hook. Daughter should be reminded he is her father and while things are tough right now, they won’t always be. Ex might grow up.
I’d take it back to court, take all the evidence that he’s not following the orders, hopefully there is something they can do like stop them visitation or something!! Gosh people like this make me sick!! They have kids and just want to be part time parents NO NO NO NO you had these children so step the fark up and be a damn parent!! I wouldn’t put my kids through that though, if my kids didn’t want to see their dad and he made 0 effort, I wouldn’t care what the court said (yes I get that would be “wrong”) but my kids feelings, wants and needs will always trump anything else
You can’t make a person have a relationship with their child.
Just allow the grandparents the time he is given. There’s nothing you can really do as you also have to follow the court order.
Stop trying to force a relationship. You are showing her that she need to chase a man for love and that’s not cool.
Seriously you need to let it go, your daughter already has. Why would you continue to set up visitation when there is nothing but disappointment! Make sure you try and get child support from him!!