Okay, so I completely agree that it is bullshit get a court order custody agreement, but also you shouldn’t be bringing new men around your daughter until you know them extremely well. It’s sad to say some men only date single women that have kids is to get closer to the kids
He won’t let u what???
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You ex doesn’t get to decide that. Has he ever been violent? I would record him making these threats. Try to communicate through text and let him know you will get a restraining order if this continues. I would refuse to talk about having guys around your daughter.
Non of his business you do whats best for and that baby,
Ignore him and if he continues to threaten you go file for a PO.
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It’s not his business to know what your every move is. He can’t keep you from moving on and eventually introducing your child to a potential new mate. However, it may be a while just to ensure that someone is actually dedicated to you and your child. But no, your ex has no right to tell you that. I’d be tempted to get a restraining order because he sounds like a threatening, jealous and controlling prick 🤷
Why are you listening he is an ex for a reason?!! Tell him that if you can’t let your boyfriend meet your child after a suitable amount of time then no girlfriends for him either. That road goes both ways
While I don’t think he should gave any say so, it is wise to be cautious who you let come around your children. I think your ex is more scared someone will hurt her as oppose to being controlling. Maybe he can watch her while you go on a date. If not, then you will know it’s just not about her being safe. In that case, write everything down, that way when you go to court it will be well documented.
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You shouldn’t have random dudes around your baby
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Dealing with this currently but on my boysfriends daughters side. Its been 3 years of this shit. We’ve gone to court, have legal visitation set etc. She still tries. If he wants to be miserable and not REALLY let you move on thats his own boyish insecurities coming out. The only advice I have, is dont play into it. Only discuss your child’s needs and leave him to himself. Do not enable the tantrums. You do you, but also make sure the relationship is one you want to continue long term before you ever bring your daughter into it.
If you dont have a court order for custody he has ZERO OBLIGATION to return your child to you. Just keep that in mind when you do want to move on. If I were in that situation I would get a custody arrangement through the courts. Good luck.
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Well… I get what he is saying. You can still move on but there is literally no reason to bring a man or woman around your kid until you are in a committed relationship for at least 6 months or so 💁 You need to know the person fully because you never know, he could be a pedo 💁
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My ex said the same thing, when we went to court he told the judge this and the judge laughed at him saying, she aloud to move on and see other people, as long as its not like a different guy every week. He has no control over who is around your child. Word of advice dont get into a relationship and introduce your child right away, give it time.
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Hes not saying u not allowed men around u hes saying HIS daughter hes probably a protective father
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How can he even control anything if he is not there. Exes always say this crap. But in reality there is nothing he can really do if you did.
In my divorce we had to go to a court mandated parenting class. In the class they went over this and they say you have to wait a year from the time you were no longer married to bring another man around the kids. So if you weren’t married then it shouldn’t matter but if you were married a judge might say the same thing.
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Who cares what he says
Same things with a woman and there are plenty of them out there that say this also. Don’t bother trying to get a restraining order by playing word games. My kids dad did the same thing it’s just words. No need to go over the top with it. Women say some stupid off the wall shit and no one bats an eye so tread carefully! He is that child’s father. Now you do know you can move forward just be responsible is all. Put your child first and don’t give into the nonsense. No one controls you but you do have control of your own actions so with that I just advise you to continue to co-parent because he is a part of his life. Don’t keep him away out of spite or to prove a point just because you have the upper hand. It ALL comes back in due time through your child I can assure you of that. Both of you have got to get to a place of peace and understanding for this child and you’re both just not there yet. Try beginning a conversation face to face and express your thoughts if he starts to get emotional then remove yourself. My husband went through this with the high conflict ex. It has helped him and my SD to REMAIN the level headed party. Years later my SD doesn’t have a relationship with her BM. Not our doing but hers alone.
To not bring random men around her, I would understand if he was saying that. But if you find someone you really like and see it going somewhere, he can’t control whether or not you introduce them to each other.
I’d hire a male nanny out of spite 
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He doesn’t have that right as long as you are cautious and don’t just bring any ol Tom, Dick or Harry around there is literally nothing he can do but get over himself.
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I’ve lived this for the past 8+ yrs. My ex (father of my two older kids) caused soo many problems for me with the guy I was with after I left my ex) thankfully for the past 2+yrs I’ve been single, so he got to me a different way by brainwashing my daughter and now my daughter is with him full time and my son is will me full time. Their bond has been destroyed all because he tried to hurt me.
I wish you all the luck. Keep fighting for your daughter and your own happiness. No “real” man would ever do that to someone they once “loved”.
Maybe he should’ve acted right and he wouldn’t have to worry about any of this. 
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You can move on without having men around your child. I agree with him, to an extent. Same goes for him as well though with women.
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I would get custody established by the courts before bringing anyone around, that way he can’t just keep your child out of spite… but other wise it’s really none of his business
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Everyone is so judgemental of him. Firstly, he may be worried about the sort of men his daughter could be exposed to. He could be worried she could be harmed. He could be worried that she will see the new guy as her dad. He’s probably hurt. He’s maybe sounding abrupt but Id guess it’s more fear than him being threatening. I wouldn’t like a new woman around my child straight away either 
you can date and enjoy men without introducing your child to them. No need to unless you become serious
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I can understand where his coming from.
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Get yourself a restraining order against him. And do as you please !!
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I see why you left him. He sounds like a real prize🙄. Girl go ahead and move on with your life. He can’t stop you from doing a damn thing. Document any threats he makes towards you and if you’re really scared of him, get yourself a restraining order and a gun. Hopefully whatever guy you decide to date can protect you from this fool.
It sounds like he is very controlling be careful and if you want to date that is fine and he can’t do anything about it but remember you are showing your daughter the way women act so don’t have men around her until you know the man really well
Maybe he means don’t bring RANDOM MEN around his daughter?
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Tell him to fuck right off.
Your ex-boyfriend has no legal say. Take baby far away.
My ex tried doing that with me and it was ALL about control! Don’t let him control who you have in your life and hold you back from moving forward!
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so a dad can’t say that some random guy can’t be around his daughter but I bet you’d have a fit if he brought a woman around the baby. You can date just don’t bring random guys around yalls child 
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Thats not how it works. If you’re bringing random guys around constantly then sure there is concern but there’s literally nothing he can do if you meet a nice guy, it gets serious, and he becomes a part of your daughter’s life.
I think its also important to acknowledge why he feels this way which is either because he’s trying to control you, or he is worried he will be replaced in his daughters life. Make sure he knows that no matter who is in her life, he will always be her dad.b
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This is called control.
You need to work on getting a formal custody order in place.
My ex-husband tried to do the same thing and he turned around and had a gif move in months after we split.
I’m a firm believer in not introducing kids to significant others until you’re at least 6 months into the relationship… and heading into a serious relationship. I grew up around boyfriends and it wasn’t a great environment.
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Be careful some men prey on single moms with kids in general. Wait a few months before letting someone know them that way you know what his intentions are and know more of this person if you don’t already know;
You should set the same rule towards him with another woman. But he is a man when he gets into a serious relationship with someone else that will change I promise Man are ALL like that
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He can’t tell you what to do but make sure you have custody because he can keep kid. Unless judge says no one allowed around kid he can get a life
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I wouldn’t be in a rush to bring anyone around your daughter anyway . If you date someone for awhile a couple months then yes not just any old person
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Its just a form of control because he’s mad that you left. He’s still hurt over the break up AND I doubt he’ll do anything. If he does call the cops lol also, if it means he’ll start taking her more (responsibly) let him. Threats will be made that he won’t give her baxk BUT its only threats lol if he can’t help with her now he won’t want to be tied down either and definetly doesn’t want u have freedom.
I’ve been through this myself, I used to be afraid too and youll realize jts all threats for a form of control.
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Im sure you will meet someone new, and he/she will almost cost certain be around your child when/if the time is right. he has no right what so ever to tell you what to do tho. 
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No man should be around your child until its serious anyway. You don’t just take your daughter around any man you date. Why would you even want to??? 
Stop worrying about finding a man and worry about what’s best for your child.
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Not his call. You should be careful bringing news men into your life but doesn’t mean you shouldn’t. Use your own judgement. Make sure you know the man and you are serious about being with him and he needs to accept your child inhis life as well you come in a package.
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He doesn have a say in what u do lmao have the baby ar o und who ever u want
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unfortunately for him, he has no say in the matter… But… if its just casual, i wouldnt have any love interest around until its somewhat serious… I waited 6 months after dating my husband before i introduced the 2
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I mean the guy has a point… my ex and I agreed that until we’re like engaged to be married we wouldn’t bring significant others around our daughter… she doesn’t deserve to have random people in and out of her life. Get a sitter & go on a date, but boyfriends don’t need to be around kids, point blank. 
I wouldn’t be okay with it if it was the other way around so I don’t hold a double standard. Plus, my daughter deserves the one on one time with me anyways. The only people I bring around her are friends and family. Children need consistency. Even though his motive might feel controlling, (and even if that is the motive), it doesn’t matter because it’s most likely what’s best for the child.
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Your ex cant do anything about you meeting someone…Im sure you would be sensible about when you introduce new partners to your child…Which any parent would do…He has no control over who you choose to date etc…Sounds to me he is still trying to have some control in your life…It could be more scare tactics…A judge would laugh him out of court if he said he wanted full access cos you had a new boyfriend around your daughter
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I can understand both of you. Time heals and maybe right now introducing a new person to your girl isn’t right. I was single for 3 years before I moved on and when I started seeing my now hubby I did it when my girl was at her dads. Or when she wasn’t around eg at my parents. There is a way to do it but it’s about being a grown up and putting your daughter first
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So see what happens. Think logically, what exactly can he do? Not a damn thing.
Well honestly he has no control of what you do in your life. You have every right to have a man around your daughter. Same for him visa versa. However from personal experience I would say please be careful bringing people around too soon into getting to know them. You don’t know anyone or their intentions until you know them. Hire a babysitter or send her to her father when you need alone time.
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Me and my ex had a 3 month rule. If you date them longer than 3 months then our daughter could meet them. We did this to kinda try to keep her from getting her feelings hurt when someone didn’t stick around. This was mainly because of him. Ive only dated 2 people since her father in 9 years. He on the other hand dated several.
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I’m glad he’s telling you this . He better or else you’ll probably do the same as most do . bring Someone right away around there kids
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Honestly you should not be bringing random men around your child at all nor be flippant about bringing new significant others around her either.
One of parents biggest concerns when separations happen is the other playing house with the child and/or attempting to replace them in the childs life with a new partner.
Yes, he actually can have stipulations put into a court order stating that you and new partners must have been together for x amount of time before introducing them to the child. While never having a serious partner around the child isnt realistic putting stipulations where the child is concerned is not.
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Y’all aren’t together anymore. He can’t control your life. Do you. I do advise if you start dating again you don’t bring them around your daughter until things are serious just my opinion
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At the end of the day he has no say in who you bring around your child and you have no say in who he brings around your child (of course unless someone isn’t safe and all that)
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My ex tried pulling the same thing. Even went on to say that I was a whore when I did meet someone over a year after the split. Long story short, move on regardless of your ignorant ex. He cant stop you. If he becomes threatening, call the cops and get a PFA order.
Get full custody for sure and tell him to fuck off your not together and he’s not your mama he can’t control you
He’s coming on way too strong but I do agree with what he’s saying. Until you know it’s serious, then introduce. You never know if someone is a bad person even years into it so you gotta do everything you can to make sure he is.
I agree with him. I didnt have my husband around mt son until we had dated over a year. Remember the #saveourchildren ? This is one way to combat that if nothing else. Dont bring new dudes around your child
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He has EVERY RIGHT to KNOW who his child comes into contact with. He DOESNT have the right to tell his ex who to date. It’s a fine line. She will have to tell him that the only man that comes into contact with his daughter will be the man she plans on having a long term relationship with. As the parents, they both need to define the boundaries to protect the daughter. The father is in fear for his daughter. And don’t want her getting hurt. BUT the ex cannot define who you date.
I don’t agree with bringing kids around someone that I’m interested until I know it’s serious but if that’s not the case and you do plan on waiting awhile to introduce your child to a man then screw him you don’t have to answer to him I say 6 months possibly earlier if you know for sure
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I personally think you don’t introduce a new person in your life till it’s getting serious
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Sounds like a controlling abuser. You did the right thing getting you and your child away from him.
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He has no control over you have around your daughter, just like you cant tell him he can’t have any women around her, he doesn’t have to like it but he must accept it, get a parenting order in place then he can’t just take her and not give her back if he feels like it, and if you feel he will or could become agressive get an avo order so h er can’t contact you unless about the child
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I mean as a mother you shouldn’t want a revolving door around your child anyway. Once things are serious of course he will be around but until then he’s not all that wrong!
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I mean, there’s really nothing he can do unless he goes to court and gets it put in paperwork, other than that he can’t control what you do, who you see, or anything.
The amount of people justifying his threat is concerning. Unless she has given him a real reason to be concerned, he has no business telling her what she can and can’t do wether he likes it or not. A child isn’t an object for control…
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When you both start dating someone you both should meet who going to be around your daughter
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He can’t do anything. But before you do, just make sure it’s a stable committed relationship first.
I get where hes coming from… hes just looking out for his daughters safety. Too many weirdos in this world to just let anyone around your child. A mother overseas just recently lost both her young girls in a violent, sadistic way to her boyfriend she had only been living with for about a month, known him for a fair amount of months before that. But you can NEVER be too careful.
In saying that, hes not stopping you from dating or seeing other guys… so maybe when he has her, you can do the dating thing then.
Unless its really serious between you two, I wouldnt have just any ol’ man around my son.
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Ur allowed to bring whoever u want to around ur kid as long as they are a safe person. Im glad my soon to be ex husband has never said anything like this cuz that would be another thing on the already very long list to use in court against him
He sounds like he’s trying to control you…if he makes threats make a police report and get a restraining order against him. He can’t tell you who you can bring around your daughter.
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You need to file emergency sole custody ASAP so he can’t do anything stupid. He wouldn’t be allowed to see the child until there’s a motion in place because he legally corny have to give the child back
First, get child support established… Second, do you. I’m pretty sure he’s moving on and having bitches around your child.
Um… you don’t tell him and keep your mouth shut 
.
Tell him he needs to step up with the childcare then. But in all seriousness new men should not be around your children for a long long time. Especially that young.
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He can’t threaten you like that. Make a police report and file an order of protection.
He is probably just worried about his child & he is allowed to be, i am the same way.
I wont allow any man around my child straight away, we would have to together for a while first. I also wouldn’t allow any new boyfriend to watch my child with out me around, we would have to be together for a long time & i would have to know that i could trust him before i let that happen, i will never understand these mothers that actually just let a new boyfriend baby sit there child, just crazy.
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Not his life to have a say, yous aren’t together…
Don’t just go out and have randoms around her continuously , but when its time for you to move on and it feels right, then just be careful who is around her…
The moment he decided not to be the man in your life- he gave up his say in what YOU do. As long as you are taking care of your daughter- he has ZERO he can say. You literally don’t have to even talk to the man about anything other than your daughter. He’s entitled to know nothing about you or the life you choose to build after y’all split
Use common sense and protect your daughter at all costs. Keep her away from anything until you know its serious… but you have every right to move out… just use your head about who and how soon you let a man around your baby
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Tell him to go pound salt !!
Honestly my ex tried that shit and I told him to get over himself. I have full custody of her and i always put her safety over everything
He can’t tell you what to do hun. Although i feel for you because my kids dad is the same we get along okay but if i was seeing someone he would treat me like shit 
Keep those txt just in case! He does not run your life! He needs to understand that. Keep talks with him only about baby and keep your info on social media private. He has no business what goes on in your like his business is only about the child. Stand your ground and let him know you have no problem going to the cops or court to make sure you and baby are safe! Call his bluff!!
What you do isn’t any of his business… as long as you think she’s safe that’s all that matters
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Do u and tell him to duck off
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If he makes threats, put a restraining order on him. Seems like he wants to make your life miserable by controlling who you date.
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Obviously he can fuck off…
BUT I swear to god I’m so suspicious of everyone anyway that I’d probably never bring a new guy around my child until she could talk. There’s so many fucking weirdos out there and I could never take the chance of my child not being able to speak to me god forbid something happen
Your gonna do what’s best for your baby right? And obviously leaving your BD was the right choice for you. Live your life. Once you don’t miss/care about him anymore you won’t care what he has to say. Live your life and raise your baby.
It’s really not his business unless there’s a proven safety issue. But keep in mind that you probably aren’t going to want girls around your daughter. Personally don’t think anyone should meet child till you know you want them around long term. But him threatening you is ridiculous and you need to show the police.
I mean when my ex and I split I already had no intention of any new dude ever meeting him until I can actually talk to my son about it. Nobody comes before my baby but I know not everyone sees it that way but I’m extra protective and I’m sure he is too
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Well we live in a disgusting and scary world. You should be thinking like him too at this stage aswell. he is not controlling your life or who you meet, im sure he knows you are not going to stay single for the rest of your life but he just doesnt want random dudes around his little daughter, just being over protective about her. You hear alot of creep stories out there these days, a person isnt safe in their own backyard let alone get a stranger into a one year olds life too soon. Just take the time, focus now on raising your little one more and whatever flows flows…
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I agree with him.
No man should be around it kids if you’re no serious about each other. But that goes for him and girls as well.
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He has no say take get a court order the most they can say is no over nights with bf when child’s home y’all can still be together and you can put it for him to no gf when he has the child
Girl its never gonna end either. My kids father threatens any man that even tries to talk to me. I have a restraining order and that type of crazy doesnt stop no matter what. Yes hes been to jail for it and he doesnt care. Came out the same old person.
Just make good decisions when you are choosing a partner. Don’t introduce your daughter to strangers until you’re sure about them and make sure they’re not going to put her or your title as mom in jeopardy. He will not be worried as long as you’re wise with your choices.
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He shouldn’t be threatening you with that especially if he’s hardly even around her. Obviously use your better judgment and don’t bring strange men around your child. Hes trying to control you.
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I went through this SAME THING, guess what… her dad didn’t do shit, because I told him don’t no man tell me what to do with my life and child. I have my daughter 100% of the time now, and he eventually just stopped coming around though. So his loss honestly. I gave every opportunity to be civil and got no effort back in return my boyfriend has now been in my daughter’s life since she was 18 months old. And knows him as daddy. She’s now going on 4 this April.