That would be a no for me. He doesn’t deserve to be in there if he will only cause you stress.
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YOU as the mother you have the choice to let him in the room. If you say no they will not allow him in. Idk how covid restrictions are there, but with my youngest I was only allowed 1 support person. And wasn’t allowed visitors. No do not let him in there, birthing is supposed to be stress and drama free to make it easier on mom. You bring him in all there will be is drama and stress. It is your choice in the end, not his.
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If it stresses you out, I don’t think its good for your health and the whole birthing process.
Don’t let him in and get a restraining order NOW so he can’t hope to come near you.
I wouldnt he could stress you and baby out
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No way… you need someone there that is there for u through labour… im in similar situation nd my sis in law is comin in with me because she will support me through the labour… its stressful.enough nd regardless ppl saying he has a right to have there he doesn’t… this is ur time having ur gorgeous precious baby and he sounds no good for support just selfish 
best of luck x
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This is a beautiful and sacred moment. You need someone who respects you and someone to truly support YOU!
No matter what he says too you, don’t let him make you feel guilty. This decision is due to choices HE made and these are the consequences of HIS ACTIONS! It’s ok to feel hurt, you have every right to feel what you do. You need to start taking care of you and that needs to start now! Good luck to you and May God Bless you and your babies!
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Why you have 4 kids with that idiot? You aren’t very Brite either.
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Omg im so pleased loads of people arnt saying about his rights.
Look you need to do what is best for your baby. Which means during birth what is best for you, stress is dangerous for you and the baby during labour. Esp with covid you might be choosing him over somebody else who will be supportive (I’m sorry but he doesn’t sound like he will be).
Adding into that you might be risking exposing you and baby to covid if hes too selfish to be careful.
If your concerned I would personally speak with your midwife. They might put it on the notes and maybe use covid as an excuse to not allow him in. This happens more then anybody would think with people thinking they have a right to a floor show when somebody is in labour.
Do what is best for you and the baby. You need to have a nice calm delivery room. Not that stress. I hope you have a great labour and it all goes well. Take care of yourself and your babies <3
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Do whatever you think is good for you !!! You’re already pregnant and stressed you don’t need more hessel in your life ! Do whatever brings peace to your heart 
have a happy moment delivering your child !
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He’s the dad he has rights to be in there
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That baby comes first. You do what’s best for you and that baby. If having him there is going to stress you out that’s obviously not what’s best for you and that baby. He doesn’t deserve to be there and chose that when he went behind your back. Don’t let him bully you into it.
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Even tho he is the dad, you need to be calm while in labour so do you. He can wait outside if need be.
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Was he in the room when the other kids were born? If he was don’t let your hurt keep this child from hearing stories from dad like the other kids get to hear
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I’d probably let him join. Esp if there’s a sliver of hope of future coparenting.
Do what is best for you, honestly you do not need any added stress on that day…
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Don’t let your personal feelings interfere with him being there for his child. If you can’t put your feelings aside now how are you guna deal with co parenting.
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Giving birth is a very stressful and difficult time for a woman. You need someone there who you trust and will support you. This man is proving the opposite so father or not don’t allowed it of it’s not what you want. Fathers do NOT have an automatic right to be in the birthing room. Nobody except the woman in labour and the midwife or doctor do. You do what’s best for you x
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Fuck him. #womanpower 
Side note… he doesn’t need to be there in the delivery room…that is YOUR choice! YOU’RE the one giving birth. He’s supposed to be there to support you & if he hasn’t been doing that all along then why let him now? I wouldn’t let him in my delivery room…that’s for damn sure. He could see the baby & the kids later, but I wouldn’t need him there holding my hand. 
I know some hospitals only allow 1 support person right now. I would honestly rather have my mom over him there if I were you. Just tell him due to covid restrictions he isn’t allowed. He can see the baby when you bring the baby home and your ready. Just because he is the dad doesn’t mean he automatically has the right to be in there. Especially with all the crap he has put you through.
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Nope. He’s an awful role model for the kids.
You described a little boy that can’t handle life and runs away from his problems to his parents. He’s stupid to risk his children around a womsn he barely knows.
And that includes your lo on the way. Normally I’d say well he is the father- but nope. He is doing this from a selfish I’ll have it my way kind of way and frankly, some people need to stop enabling his bs. I don’t mean that you are- ahemhis parents- he can learn to hear no.
He can also learn to man up to become what his kids need. It ain’t about him he needs just quit it. Im really annoyed by this man FOR you.
Aside from that- your body, your choice you 2 ain’t together now he can wait in lobby until lo born keep your support person in the room. Pretty sure only 1 can be anyway. This is a huge thing you don’t need to be stressing tf bc he’s in there causing drama. He sounds like that’s all he’d do. You got a baby to deliver.
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It’s down to you who you have in the delivery room do what’s best for you and baby don’t feel guilty on your descion yes he maybe the father it your body your delivery your the one who will go through the emotionalrollercoster so you need to make sure your as stress free as possible
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It’s how you feel. To me, sounds like this narcissistic prick is playing with your emotions … especially in this most vulnerable time. Sounds like he can’t figure his own shit out. Let him co parent the kids but for your own sanity, you need to break ties with him personally. He is a wrecking ball to your psyche.
I’m surprised at how many people are saying to put him before yourself, during delivery 
that’s a stressful time for yourself, and the baby. Do what you feel is best for you and the baby. If you don’t want him in there, don’t let him be in there simple as that 
he may be the father, but that doesn’t give him an automatic pass at being allowed to be in the room with you. Given the fact that he’s cheated, left you and your other kids high and dry numerous times, you have to think about you and them first, not him.
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If that happened to me I wouldn’t even let him know I was in labor. I would just text him when it was all said and done to let him know the baby was here.
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Safety of the baby should be priority of both of you, if that means you have a friend or family member over him that’s 100% fine.
He needs to grow up and acknowledge the stress and hurt he has caused you especially during your pregnancy.
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When you’re giving birth you shouldn’t have to worry about anything besides the baby and yourself. If him being there is going to cause you stress then don’t let him in the room. Ultimately the hospital will do whatever you want them to do lay down the law.
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Even if he doesnt love you anymore hes still the father and if he still want to be involved as the father then he should be there for the birth of his child. BUT… if it’s a situation that will cause toxic energy, chaos, or unnecessary stress during your labor you have to do what’s best for you and baby. He should be there but if it will end in a shitshow he can wait in the waiting room.
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Absolutely not! That is a very stressful thing… birthing a baby is not easy and you should have someone with you that you can count on… usually I would say dad deserves to be there… but not in this case!
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DONT DO IT. just don’t, from personal experience. Mine brought said girlfriend to the hospital to meet my son but claimed her as a friend. I didn’t even know he brought her. He showed her my son through the nursery window, while I was passed out from giving birth
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Nope. I wouldn’t want him in there either.
I would say no. He can be in the waiting room.
I would not let him in the delivery room. 
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Let him wait outside
Tell him Katie said no.
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I dont feel like it is right for you to make him miss that special moment because your feelings are hurt. That is his baby too and he deserves to be there if he wants.
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It’s all about YOUR comfort. I wouldn’t be seeing anyone else laboring and contracting with you. You need to do what you think will let you be the most relaxed mama so that you can deliver the baby into a happy environment
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From the bottom of my heart I pray you have a supportive family! Don’t ruin your life with someone like that! 
Life is sooo short. Focus on yourself and your babies!
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That moment is about you and that baby. It’s a stressful situation as his so I’d tell him no personally …
Being the wife of a man whom struggled with this same shit… allow him to be there. You will regret it down the road. Trust me. He means well, it may not seem like it but he means well. That is a good thing if he wants to see his child born. PTSD is not easy to deal with. But him saying he wants to be there. Is a good thing.
Have someone in the labor room that actually supports you and makes you feel good!! He will just cause more stress. Find that one person that helps you no matter what and they should be the one with you… not him!
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Call me paranoid, but if it’s me, I wont let him in. I dont know where you live but He might take the baby away considering he wants all your kids to live with him.
Hope you find peace in your heart.
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This Blows my effing mind!!! Women actually put up with this ?? 
girl u gotta stop 
and get yourself and those kids in a safe stable environment without him. As far as letting him be in the delivery room I say why not? It’s his kid to don’t take that precious moment away from a father that u loved and gave that many chances too… its your fault you kept going back and tolerated such behavior from a grown ass man. He has another women yet again!! so what?!! doesn’t mean he shouldn’t be in the room 2 welcome his baby into the world 🤷 sounds like a mean jealous move right there. Get your head outa your butt and move on from him for good and put you and those babies first! Just my opinion.
This is about you and your comfort. He can wait outside until you are ready for him to come in and see the baby. Simple.
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Nope if he can’t be there for the hard times he doesn’t get to be there for the good times
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Choosing to not have him in the delivery room doesn’t mean he can’t meet the baby etc. you shouldn’t have to be stressed out in labor and delivery. You shouldn’t have to compromise who is there while you birth. That’s a MAJOR MOMENT, for your freaking body, and even a hospital and obgyn/midwife is going to tell you to pick a support partner that you need and want in the room. It doesn’t have to be the father.
I would tell him to go jump off a damn cliff.
And for the people that are like oh he has a right to be there… oh ok so if have a one night stand with a stranger… do they have a right to be there to? It’s literally your most exposed and vulnerable moment in life why in the HELL would you want somebody father or not to be there unless they are who you really WANT there.
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Normally I am a big advocate of allowing fathers to be fathers. This includes being in the room during birth. However, if it would make your birth experience stressful then no. He can come see the baby after you guys make it home.
Move. The. Fuck. On.
He has mistreated you, and by accepting this you are teaching your children that this is normal and fine.
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He doesn’t need to be in the room. The band they put on is mother support person. It doesn’t say Father! You need someone in there that’s going to ease your stress and make you comfortable. They will tell him thr same thing. You stand your ground and say no to him.
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Do not feel pressured to let ANYONE in the delivery room that u don’t want there! You need to create a calm and happy and supportive environment and he will clearly not provide that. Tell him no. Its all about you and the baby that day. Maybe if you feel comfortable with it and its allowed at your hospital you could video it…but fck his feelings. Don’t feel guilt tripped by him…
He can wait in the waiting room.
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Nope. He has no right to be in there and will cause you grief during an already difficult time.
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Put his ass on child support and let the court decide when he has the kids with his PTSD! As far as the new baby, you enjoy your moment with delivery. Screw his in and out BS! You don’t know this woman either! She could be all kinds of a hot mess! Never trust a stranger man or woman around your children! You are their protector until they are of age to make that choice! My advice STOP screwing him!! No more babies with that guy!
Girl please do you and screw him and stop being his doormat!
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If it’s going to cause you stress then he doesn’t have to be in the room regardless. Any doctor or nurse will tell you that because it isn’t good for you and baby.
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I wouldn’t let him in, your in a vulnerable state when in labor and delivery, and he had already hurt you enough. He can wait out in the waiting room like everybody else to meet his child.
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Wow…some of these posts on here frikin amaze me.
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That room is your sanctuary… You need to be as calm as possible to keep stress down on the baby… Go with your gut if you feel that strongly than he can just sit in the waiting room… Maybe have the person in with you take a video so he doesnt fully miss the birth of his child…
He can still be there at the hospital without invading your privacy and your comfort zone in the actual delivery room. Your main focus should be to deliver a happy, healthy baby and not worrying about him on that day. On delivery day, it’s all about you and the baby. Nobody else matters.
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No and No you do what’s right for you, if he even considered the feelings you have as the mother of his children he wouldn’t be so unreasonable
If he wants to be there then he shouldn’t have left you.
Unpopular opinion I’m sure… if he wants to be there I think he has every right since it’s his child too. With that being said you don’t need the stress so maybe have your mom or friend or someone that will be there for you too. Lay out ground rules for him and make your other support person aware and if he can’t follow the rules you lay out then he gets kicked out.
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You have how many kids living in a hotel room and about to have another newborn and your worried about where this loser is putting his pecker? maybe change your priorities
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Don’t have anyone there you don’t want there, get your custody in order for your kids, don’t go back to him, don’t let him come back to you. If you need to get legal paperwork in order so he can’t come around you or the kids. Re read your post, you don’t need him in your life.
He doesn’t need to be in the room if you’re going to be stressed. It sounds like an unhealthy situation. You need to be as calm and relaxed as possible during your labor. It’s up to you but increased stress will affect the baby and can affect your labor.
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You need to set aside the feelings you have for him and allow him to be a parent… Move on don’t allow him to just keep coming back when he feels like he wants to be with you again, but allow him to see his kids and this one be born… As far as the new lady i understand that issue. You have to make it clear to him tho if he is there he can’t stress you or any of that or he is out.
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I know you want compassion and support, but I feel like you need tough love right now. You’re living in a hotel room with three kids about to have another one and you’re caught up in “he loves me he loves me not.” He doesn’t love you because no man that loves a woman puts her in a position to ask an anonymous post like this. If he wanted to be with you, he would have never left the first time. You need to focus on you and focus on not living in a hotel room because if this man has any brain cells and really wants to take the kids to live with him and this new girl, he would very likely win in a court case because YOU’RE LIVING IN A HOTEL. Stop worrying about him and work on bettering yourself. No one deserves the crap I feel he’s put you through. Don’t put your kids through that either. That’s not fair to them.
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That’s 100% your choice not anyone else’s if you want him in the room or not. If you don’t want him there. Make sure to make it clear to the midwives that he’s not allowed to come in.
i’m certain the hos would probably be asking who you want in delivery room with you–if anyone. if you don’t want him there, simply tell them you don’t want him in there. i know when my grandkids were born (myself also), they were asked, who do you want in delivery room with you. i think with the last one, she could have daddy and one other person. with my 3, they asked did i want my hus in delivery room with me. personally–i think i’d rather do it on my own than have someone whom i know is has been lying to me. i’d wouldn’t want him there.
He sounds like a narcissist. Go away from him. Otherwise he is going to destroy your emotional health
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What, you don’t know girl bye.
If you don’t want him in there then just say “no”giving birth is stressful enough without that kind of stuff going on.
Don’t ever be someone’s second choice
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my honest opinion. Giving birth can be very stressful in itself. You don’t need the added stress of him being in the room for delivery. He isn’t there for YOU. He can wait in the lobby and meet the baby AFTER it’s born.
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Say no. You have no obligation to let him in.
Stop having sex with him #1.
Do what is in the best interest of your children, always. If him being in the room with stress you out, don’t let him. You stressing= baby/ birthing stressing.
YES, he is entitled to be there but he is all over the place, & he should have thought his decisions out a lot more. He doesn’t seem stable, trustworthy, or reliable. Dont let your kids go with a random stranger just because “dad” said so.
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It’s still his baby and you chose to stay with him while he went back and forth all that time. If you want to coparent don’t let him miss out on the baby’s birth. Put the baby first and just be friends. Stay strong 
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You have to respect yourself and walk away from the situation you are in. One moment at a time.
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do you have family to live with?
It is YOUR birth no matter what. Doesn’t matter who put the baby there. In the end that birth is yours. He is not entitled to see anything or be there. Period. If his presence stresses you i would say no.
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He doesn’t have to be in the room when the baby is born and given he is clearly unstable I wouldn’t be letting the kids live with him. See him he’s live with him no.
Nope. You owe him nothing
Hurt or not, that is not the kind of stress you need when you are giving birth. Your body is already going through so much you don’t want to add stress to the situation. Not to mention your baby could go into distress. you would never forgive yourself if something happened to your baby, but you will be able to forgive yourself for not letting him be there that I can promise you. He is a grown ass man. He knew there would be repercussions to his actions but he didn’t care. He waited until times got hard and then used that as an excuse to leave you AND his kids. Instead of just being a man and saying I can’t do this anymore there is someone else, he cheated and then left you high and dry while pregnant none the less! So for your sake and your baby’s I would NOT let him in there.
That is totally your choice…you definitely don’t need added stress…never feel guilty for your choices
Do you. Self care. This is your walk.
RESPECT YOURSELF MAMA!!! you’re worth more
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Stop having babies. You said this is number 4. Get your tubes tied.
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Kick him to the curb and worry about you and your children
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Sisssssssssssss giving birth is stressful af, HAVE SOMEONE THERE WHO DOESNT STRESS YOU OUT! please don’t listen to these " he deserves to be there", because does not!
You don’t need the stress of him being there I made the decision to not have my second child father there and I don’t regret it one bit you should have a support person like mom sister or friend who will support you during labor … he wants to be there for labor but not for pregnancy? Move on and don’t look back 4 kids need a healthy happy mom and if all he does is bring you down get rid of him you can make it there is plenty of help from the government until you can get yourself on your feet good luck mama
You have no respect for your self , how can you expect him to respect you?
If he had respect for the mother of his unborn child he would be deserving of attending the birth. But he doesn’t and has pushed you to a heart breaking point whilst growing a human inside of you. How disrespectful and just utterly k@k of him. Put him on the “not allowed to visit” list as he should have thought of all this prior to sticking his d!ck inside everything. And then blaming it on ptsd. P*ssy
Easy let him be in room if his child. Put your anger to side. But on another note you know this blokes a total nobhead if keeps treating you this way. But fact is he’s going to carry on if you keep letting him and laying down making more babies that he never going to be trully commited to or you. Get your self respect bk, your worth more than a fumble with an idiot. Take charge for yourself and your kids sake. You dont need a fifth child
I would say no to both right now. OR simply say you will think about it. Find out as much as you can about this woman. Might help put your mind at ease or not.
And yet you not only continue to sleep with him, you keep having babies with him. What’ wrong with this picture???
Thats his child too. He has every right to be there. You can get together and discuss rules and terms for him being there but legally he has every right to see his child born.