Girl please do you and screw him and stop being his doormat!
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If it’s going to cause you stress then he doesn’t have to be in the room regardless. Any doctor or nurse will tell you that because it isn’t good for you and baby.
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I wouldn’t let him in, your in a vulnerable state when in labor and delivery, and he had already hurt you enough. He can wait out in the waiting room like everybody else to meet his child.
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Wow…some of these posts on here frikin amaze me.
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That room is your sanctuary… You need to be as calm as possible to keep stress down on the baby… Go with your gut if you feel that strongly than he can just sit in the waiting room… Maybe have the person in with you take a video so he doesnt fully miss the birth of his child…
He can still be there at the hospital without invading your privacy and your comfort zone in the actual delivery room. Your main focus should be to deliver a happy, healthy baby and not worrying about him on that day. On delivery day, it’s all about you and the baby. Nobody else matters.
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No and No you do what’s right for you, if he even considered the feelings you have as the mother of his children he wouldn’t be so unreasonable
If he wants to be there then he shouldn’t have left you.
Unpopular opinion I’m sure… if he wants to be there I think he has every right since it’s his child too. With that being said you don’t need the stress so maybe have your mom or friend or someone that will be there for you too. Lay out ground rules for him and make your other support person aware and if he can’t follow the rules you lay out then he gets kicked out.
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You have how many kids living in a hotel room and about to have another newborn and your worried about where this loser is putting his pecker? maybe change your priorities
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Don’t have anyone there you don’t want there, get your custody in order for your kids, don’t go back to him, don’t let him come back to you. If you need to get legal paperwork in order so he can’t come around you or the kids. Re read your post, you don’t need him in your life.
He doesn’t need to be in the room if you’re going to be stressed. It sounds like an unhealthy situation. You need to be as calm and relaxed as possible during your labor. It’s up to you but increased stress will affect the baby and can affect your labor.
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You need to set aside the feelings you have for him and allow him to be a parent… Move on don’t allow him to just keep coming back when he feels like he wants to be with you again, but allow him to see his kids and this one be born… As far as the new lady i understand that issue. You have to make it clear to him tho if he is there he can’t stress you or any of that or he is out.
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I know you want compassion and support, but I feel like you need tough love right now. You’re living in a hotel room with three kids about to have another one and you’re caught up in “he loves me he loves me not.” He doesn’t love you because no man that loves a woman puts her in a position to ask an anonymous post like this. If he wanted to be with you, he would have never left the first time. You need to focus on you and focus on not living in a hotel room because if this man has any brain cells and really wants to take the kids to live with him and this new girl, he would very likely win in a court case because YOU’RE LIVING IN A HOTEL. Stop worrying about him and work on bettering yourself. No one deserves the crap I feel he’s put you through. Don’t put your kids through that either. That’s not fair to them.
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That’s 100% your choice not anyone else’s if you want him in the room or not. If you don’t want him there. Make sure to make it clear to the midwives that he’s not allowed to come in.
i’m certain the hos would probably be asking who you want in delivery room with you–if anyone. if you don’t want him there, simply tell them you don’t want him in there. i know when my grandkids were born (myself also), they were asked, who do you want in delivery room with you. i think with the last one, she could have daddy and one other person. with my 3, they asked did i want my hus in delivery room with me. personally–i think i’d rather do it on my own than have someone whom i know is has been lying to me. i’d wouldn’t want him there.
He sounds like a narcissist. Go away from him. Otherwise he is going to destroy your emotional health
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What, you don’t know girl bye.
If you don’t want him in there then just say “no”giving birth is stressful enough without that kind of stuff going on.
Don’t ever be someone’s second choice
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my honest opinion. Giving birth can be very stressful in itself. You don’t need the added stress of him being in the room for delivery. He isn’t there for YOU. He can wait in the lobby and meet the baby AFTER it’s born.
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Say no. You have no obligation to let him in.
Stop having sex with him #1.
Do what is in the best interest of your children, always. If him being in the room with stress you out, don’t let him. You stressing= baby/ birthing stressing.
YES, he is entitled to be there but he is all over the place, & he should have thought his decisions out a lot more. He doesn’t seem stable, trustworthy, or reliable. Dont let your kids go with a random stranger just because “dad” said so.
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It’s still his baby and you chose to stay with him while he went back and forth all that time. If you want to coparent don’t let him miss out on the baby’s birth. Put the baby first and just be friends. Stay strong 
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You have to respect yourself and walk away from the situation you are in. One moment at a time.
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do you have family to live with?
It is YOUR birth no matter what. Doesn’t matter who put the baby there. In the end that birth is yours. He is not entitled to see anything or be there. Period. If his presence stresses you i would say no.
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He doesn’t have to be in the room when the baby is born and given he is clearly unstable I wouldn’t be letting the kids live with him. See him he’s live with him no.
Nope. You owe him nothing
Hurt or not, that is not the kind of stress you need when you are giving birth. Your body is already going through so much you don’t want to add stress to the situation. Not to mention your baby could go into distress. you would never forgive yourself if something happened to your baby, but you will be able to forgive yourself for not letting him be there that I can promise you. He is a grown ass man. He knew there would be repercussions to his actions but he didn’t care. He waited until times got hard and then used that as an excuse to leave you AND his kids. Instead of just being a man and saying I can’t do this anymore there is someone else, he cheated and then left you high and dry while pregnant none the less! So for your sake and your baby’s I would NOT let him in there.
That is totally your choice…you definitely don’t need added stress…never feel guilty for your choices
Do you. Self care. This is your walk.
RESPECT YOURSELF MAMA!!! you’re worth more
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Stop having babies. You said this is number 4. Get your tubes tied.
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Kick him to the curb and worry about you and your children
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Sisssssssssssss giving birth is stressful af, HAVE SOMEONE THERE WHO DOESNT STRESS YOU OUT! please don’t listen to these " he deserves to be there", because does not!
You don’t need the stress of him being there I made the decision to not have my second child father there and I don’t regret it one bit you should have a support person like mom sister or friend who will support you during labor … he wants to be there for labor but not for pregnancy? Move on and don’t look back 4 kids need a healthy happy mom and if all he does is bring you down get rid of him you can make it there is plenty of help from the government until you can get yourself on your feet good luck mama
You have no respect for your self , how can you expect him to respect you?
If he had respect for the mother of his unborn child he would be deserving of attending the birth. But he doesn’t and has pushed you to a heart breaking point whilst growing a human inside of you. How disrespectful and just utterly k@k of him. Put him on the “not allowed to visit” list as he should have thought of all this prior to sticking his d!ck inside everything. And then blaming it on ptsd. P*ssy
Easy let him be in room if his child. Put your anger to side. But on another note you know this blokes a total nobhead if keeps treating you this way. But fact is he’s going to carry on if you keep letting him and laying down making more babies that he never going to be trully commited to or you. Get your self respect bk, your worth more than a fumble with an idiot. Take charge for yourself and your kids sake. You dont need a fifth child
I would say no to both right now. OR simply say you will think about it. Find out as much as you can about this woman. Might help put your mind at ease or not.
And yet you not only continue to sleep with him, you keep having babies with him. What’ wrong with this picture???
Thats his child too. He has every right to be there. You can get together and discuss rules and terms for him being there but legally he has every right to see his child born.