I have a big debate going on in my head that I could use advice on. The father of my child is offered to sign over full custody to me once our son is born. But he still will be in our sons life on a regular basis, he’s the one that brought this up not me, I would of never have asked him to do that because I would never keep my son from his dad, we broke up right before I found out I was prefab that’s but it was on okay terms but better off letting our son have two separate happy homes, but he said he’s okay with giving me full custody. My debate in my head, what are the pros and cons to it. I know once I do it that he will no longer be responsible for child support, which is why I’m pretty sure he wants to do it. But also I know there are a lot of positives to it also, not having to ask for permission when I wanna take him places, don’t ever have to worry about going back and forth to court over things. Advice?
What a deadbeat. He’s trying to avoid child support. I don’t agree with cs unless dads not doing his share etc but he needs to learn kids value time more than anything
WTH? He doesn’t want commitment. If he’s the father , why doesn’t he claim on birth certificate? Idk? I wouldn’t allow that crap. Ijs.
He’s trying to get out of child support…if he signs over his rights, he’s not legally obligated to pay child support should he start slacking as a father
So judges now days dont just let dads sign away rights. They cant get out of being responsible for the child that way anymore. There has to be a significant reason they’d do that.
More than likely the judge will not allow it.
So basically he wants the perks of being a dad (will be in the son’s life) but no responsibility? Um… no. Put his name on that birth certificate and have him support the child. He wants his cake and eat it too and that can’t happen.
Have you even checked the guidelines for your State? In a lot states a man can’t sign over his rights without another person taking over the responsibility just can’t decide you don’t wanna be a dad.
Even if he signs away his righys, he is still liable for child support. He wants to sign away his rights to not pay? Tell him to go shit in his hat . Grow up. A parent has a financial responsibility and a presence of raising that child. If he wants neither then let him sign away. Otherwise NO. You may have full custody and he can pay support and visit as he would like.
Ask yourself if you’re okay with him totally out of babes life. If you are, then discuss options with an attorney.
More than likely, it’s all about the money…
No support (either $ or supplies) = doesn’t get to be involved… if he wants to give him up legally - then he should have no contact.
He is on I believe he has to pay he is not on he has no legal claim or responsibility. So here is the hard question is he a good dad material type of man? And should he be around your baby that he won’t even help or claim?
Just don’t put him on the birth certificate. 
If you don’t need help financially, there’s really no need to drag you both through all the court mess.
Either make him claim the child or don’t involve him at all.
Better check, I think he still must pay child support. Are you putting his name on the birth certificate?
I wish mine would bye
Where I live the the mom automatically already gets full custody if the parents arent together
JUMP on it! It will only get worse from here. Agree, get it done & MOVE ON! Raise your son alone & with dignity. This way you ensure that he is not a deadbeat you or your son have to chase down or worry about~
& you will have no issues in the future should you meet a wonderful man who does want to marry you & parent your child~
Let him do it, f it. Plus btw. In my state if dad signs off rights he dont get out of support. The only way is the mom stripping him of his rights to take away child support in my state…so I’d look into that in the case he still dont wanna help after wards. Cause you still deserve help even if hes gonna be around
His way of getting out of any child support
Let him. Don’t put him on the birth certificate. You’ll enjoy traveling with your kiddo without having to ask permission.
Where I live the judge will not allow it unless someone else Is going to sign and be responsible for the child
U can have full custody and him have a visitation schedule but he will still have to pay child support if you file. Child support and visitation are 2 separate things. My stepsons mother gave my husband full custody yet she still “has” to pay child support but she doesnt so she is just racking up arrearages
I’d say dont do it, chances are hell be all good, then once he has no rights he will take off and not be in babies life, and not have to pay child support, which would be a shame for you. But if you dont mind doing it alone with no help, then go for it!
When my baby daddy did this my biggest thought was that if anything were to ever happen to me what would happen to my kids. I he has any rights he will get them (in my case my kids dont know him so I dont want that) but if I did it they wouldnt go to him.
He has no right until he signs the birth certificate. Give the baby your last name. If he doesn’t want the responsibility of helping to pay to raise the child.
I have full legal and physical custody of my 2 boys, their father is still court ordered to pay child support!
He WILL be responsible for child support and can not sign his rights over unless hes been absent for a year and there is someone willing to adopt the baby
Talk to a lawyer many give free consultation. Anything signed should be done with a lawyer.
Well, the most important pro is that he’ll be signing over full custody and if you don’t do that now you’ll regret it. But I want to add that i believe a newborn should not be moved around a lot in general but is a big no from me. Might I suggest compromising with him until the child is older and having him sleep at your place if he wants to be there overnight. Especially if you’re breastfeeding. That’s what I have worked out with my child’s father and it works really well for him.
No. If an attorney even hears that he’s willing to sign over rights to avoid child support, they will award you full custody. Visitation will be every other weekend or so. If he wants to be in his child’s life he should be financially responsible as well.
He cannot just sign his rights away, unfortunately it’s something you have to agree to and you have to have a father figure replacement to take on those responsibilities. What it sounds like is that he is just trying to get out of his Financial responsibility to the child.
*and not most states require a lot longer then a year to consider abandonment
Phone a lawyer…ask the question if he signs over rights is he still legally responsible for child support…if he says yes…pay to get that written down and signed by lawyer…then I would keep that info to myself and let him sign over rights…if that is what he is trying to do .get out of his financial responsibility…then to bad for him…
If the answer is that he won’t have to pay then don’t…
It’s not up to you that your child money not be given for him…that is law in BC…I learned that…
Just don’t have him sign the birth certificate and for thd love of God don’t give that baby his last name. He doesn’t wanna pay child support. Plus you can’t just sign rights away- unless you volunteer to terminate your own rights but that takes time and court dates etc.
Let him do it! It will make things so much easier. And you do not have to have someone willing to adopt or anything. My sister literally did this with her ex and the paperwork was the most tedious part.
If he’s going to be in his life then he needs to be dad. If not then cut ties and leave him off the bc.
Your child is your priority. Is it in the best interest of the child? That’s a question only you know the answer to. Generally speaking, it’s not. Your child shouldn’t lose a parent because he doesnt want the responsibility. What if something were to happen to you? Your child has to be the focus.
Depending on your state, whether he signs his right over or not he will still be liable for child support. Unless you have your new spouse adopt the baby. No child can be ‘fatherless’.
He will still have to pay u childsupport
Signing over full custody is not the same as giving up parental rights. He’d still have to pay child support if all he’s doing is signing over custody. In our State, he doesn’t automatically have custodial rights anyway. The unmarried mother has control. Check your State law.
My son’s father wasn’t involved whatsoever during my pregnancy. I didn’t put him on the birth certificate nor did I give the baby his last name. Less of a hassle. He told me he wanted to help financially and I said I didn’t need or want anything from him. He met his son once and then told me he didn’t want any part of his life. 🤦🤷 #hisloss #hisconscience #werebetteroff
So, he wants to stay in the kids life but sign over rights… that means he wants to be a dad but not pay child support. HELL NO!
The question you should be asking yourself is do you want the dad in your kids life? do you want to deal with his crap for the next 18 years or would you rather just let him leave? Child support is nice but not when you have to fight the dad all the time for it. And is he gonna see his kid or is he never gonna come over. Will your kid grow up thinking why doesnt daddy love me? Deep down you already know what you want to do but your scared to admit to yourself what that is. Otherwise you wouldnt have posted this question. And just so you know even if a court orders child support it doesnt mean that he will ever pay it. Or like my friend who has 3 kids and is only getting 30$ a month in child support for all 3 of them. Because he has a job that pays under the table
A decision you have to decide for yourself. As far as child support I do believe he would still have to pay. He’s still the dad. I wo7ld suggest you.speak to legal aid and find out whats really best. God lead and direct you .
lol no no, let him sign over custody. He still is obligated to pay child support even if he gives up his parental rights entirely.
He wouldnt have to pay child support or be legally responsible for the baby. Probably why he said he would give it up.
Do it but petition court for child support. You can still be paid
Giving you full custody will not negate child support. In order to stop child support, his rights would have to be terminated. In most states, parental rights cannot be terminated unless there is someone who is willing to adopt.
Since you aren’t married, (in most states) you do not have to put him on the birth certificate (and probably cannot if he isn’t present). But, typically, the state will ask for info if/when you apply for any assistance. Then, they will ask for child support whether he sees the child or not.
Sounds like all he wants to do is get out of child support. Your baby deserves that money!
Just don’t put him on birth certificate. You won’t have to go through all that court stuff
Sounds like he’s trying to get out of paying child support. I wouldn’t do it
In Montana, a man cannot sign his rights over unless another man is there to take custody of the child.
Who said that. Lol i know plentyyyy of dads my hubby included who still pays child support and gave up his rights. They give up the rights thinking they wont have to pay. But they do lol slick ricks… But let him. Youll have full rights. And still get child support. Dont be a sucker and let him get away with no paying. Put him on child support. Then have him sign his rights over.
you need to talk to a lawyer first if his name is on birth cert just cause he has no rights you can still get money . 2nd anyone who would do this for money i would not want him in his life can you see your son finding out dad sign papers not to see me so he did not have to pay mony go to a lawyer
Even if hes on the birth certificate you can still take him wherever whenever.
Signing over parental rights is different than granting full custody. Check your states laws.
If my baby daddy were to mention that to me. You best believe that I would sign whatever paper & never let him see my child EVER. A man who really loves their child & wants to be in the child’s life wouldn’t even say things like that.
Con is that he will not be held financially responsible.
You better not put on paper that he can see him when ever orOr you might as well just keep things the way they are because then you would still have a legal obligation just no benefits for the child and her son security no insurance no child support no college fund know nothing but he gets on the fringe benefits bullshit
Yep. If he wants to do it. Just because he says he wants to be there doesn’t mean he actually will. If for any reason he takes off with your son you can’t fight it very easily. If he is willing to HELL YES do it.
The taking him places won’t truly be an issue anyway… You are the mother. DO NOT BE SCARED!!! If you can financially do it alone…go for it!!! I absolutely couldn’t …@19.
Most states will not let a parent voluntarily terminate their rights
If he could walk away from my baby, not only could he sign his rights away, he could his way outta my life. Period.
If that’s what he wants let him but that doesn’t mean he gets rights to your baby.
Never mind he’s a piece of shit because anybody that would deny their child is a selfish bastard you can have all the fringbenefits and he can see him whenever you want no no now now what kind of man is a stay away from him he is Konning you
Do it! You’ll thank yourself later.
My dad signed over his parental rights and my mom changed our last names, all because he didn’t want to pay child support.
Even if he gives up his rights he still would have to pay
In most states signing away his rights does not end child support it just means he gives up the right to visit our make decisions concerning the child
Why…if hes there or going to be there regularly and 50/50 for both of u. Why???
Im confused …why is he paying child support to a child he wants 50/50?
Where i live my sisters ex husband signed rights but was still obligated to pay support. Took 10 years to find out but they did make him pay
He means no child support and free visitation rigjts if he wsnts to see the child let him keep his parental rights
Don’t let him get away with no payments or some form of financial help with HIS child! You can get full custody but I don’t think it’s wise to just let him be irresponsible and I don’t think the judge will let him get off support. Kids get more expensive the older they get. Im a single mother of 2 kids in house but we had 5 total and he’s in jail so I get no child support, trust me any help matters and you didn’t create that child alone, be smart. Good luck
Definitely let him!! It will be sooo much easier in the long run!!!
If he wants to do it your baby is better off without a father like this ! You and your baby will be fine ! I believe in you !
Absolutely NOT!! Any parent that would willingly sign over their rights right off the bat don’t even need to be a parent.Reguardless if he signs rights over or not that will always be his child, and later in life you don’t want to be the one to say Oh I let your father sign his rights over so I could get full custody.
My ex didn’t sign anything over and I was automatically awarded full custody, and he pays child support. And he isn’t involved in her life at all.
Giving full custody and signing off his parental rights are not equal… if child in ur care you get full custody. If he signs over his rights- gives up parental rights then bye, no rights means u don’t get him in ur life. U want him in ur life u help support him in every way including emotional, financially- everything…That’s the biggest crock of shit ever 
It’s the child support don’t let him get out of it no matter what
First off, you need to be married to someone who can assume responsibility, and take over parental responsibility to your son if your ex signs his rights off. Otherwise, who’s responsible for him beside you?
Secondly, why does he want to sign his rights off but still be in his life? Because he doesn’t want to pay Child support? Guess he should have wore a condom.
And Guess what? He helped make that baby, so now he has to help raise it. Part of raising a child is helping with expenses. He doesn’t get to have his cake and eat it to.
Yes, the upside to him signing his rights off is that you won’t have to answer to him about anything involving the kid. But, if he signs his rights off and something happens, a big medical expense an illness comes up or whatever, maybe your hurting for money, guess what? If he wants to be a dick, He does not have to help you in anyway. You’re on your own.
It takes two to tango. You both laid down and made a baby. You both are responsible for him. He doesn’t get a free pass.
Do it apply for government aid and get a job you are better off without that man if he wants to sign away his rights thats not a man at all
Sounds like he’s trying to get out of child support
It takes 2 to make a baby. I feel uf you lay down and make a baby it is your responsibility to provide for that child. The child support is not for you its for the child. And they deserve it.
If he’s planning on being a part of your child’s life, don’t do it because he is only doing it so he doesn’t have to pay child support. If you think he is not going to be a part of their life, or you think he will eventually fight for custody, then take it while you can.
He don’t wanna be there just do it
Most times there needs to be someone ready to adopt for them to allow him to just sign away his rights. If everything is agreeable between you two then just don’t put him on the birth certificate and claim not to know who the father is or something. Way easier than going through a legal thing and it would make it so he would have to take steps to change it such as paying for a DNA test and things like that. The only way things would start up without him doing that is if you had a need to get him for child support. Before you go through with either or any option though, consider your circumstances. Are you going to need food assistance or help with daycare funded by the state or anything like that? Some of those services won’t help unless you’re trying for child support. Not an easy situation, but I would just keep him off of all the paperwork and go from there before you guys do anything too permanent or costly. Good luck to you both.
I would let him do it!
The judge won’t terminate a fathers rights unless he can prove he is an unfit parent. Even getting full placement and full custody is hard nowadays. The best thing you can do is raise your child with a mindset that he will be an absent father, and don’t expect anything from him.
You both need to stop being childish. How about you both try to do things without involving a court unless a problem arises that cant be solved without one.
Go to court and get full custody and make him start paying child support.
If you’re not married he has no rights to the child unless he goes before a judge and has it legitimized. He will still be obligated to pay child support. That’s the way it is in Georgia anyway.
You don’t have to ask permission to take your child/children anywhere unless your applying for a passport
Don’t allow him to sign over rights, it’s saying to you “hey I wanna see the kid play daddy but you pay for everything”
This also means he will not be responsible to help out with any of the dr bills that come along with children.
You got this momma
Tell him theres no need to sign over his rights because if he does what he is supposed to as a father financially and so forth there would be no need for child support.
He’s only doing it so he doesn’t have to pay child support 
He just don’t want to pay you any money for child support
In canada, signing over your rights doesnt get you out of paying child support. He would still have to pay unless you had a significant other adopt the child.
If he wants to sign off parental rights, regardless of what he’s saying now… He won’t stay in the child’s life long term. Let him sign off and consider him a sperm donor… IT WILL BE TOUGH, BUT WORTH IT.
I dont think that’s how it works. Just because he signs his rights over doesn’t necessarily mean he is not responsible for his son. It just means that your son’s physical and legal responsibilities are all yours and he has absolutely no say in anything. He will still be responsible financially. Not sure what state you live in, but that’s how it is here in California.
Nah. Keep the messages. You can get full custody and child support that’s owed to your child
I would do it while you can…I wish i never named the dad of my first born. He didn’t deserve her and still doesn’t. That’s just me though. If you don’t need child support and he doesn’t want to be there for your child that’s his fault he has to go to sleep with that on his conscious…You can do it. Children need people who love them.