If my parent made me stop something I loved based on their partners opinion, I would probably never trust them to put me above a man again, I wouldn’t recommend doing that to her. Not to mention she could start hating school because of it and get burnt out on it
Absolutely not. The fact he is even asking you to have her do that is a huge red flag for me. He should be supportive of whatever any of the kids want to do. If his kids aren’t in sports, that’s on him for not introducing it to them.
No, bc it’s like you said…nobody is stopping them from actually trying out for a sport. Maybe he feels bad bc he didn’t push his children into sports. If they want to fo out for sports the. They should, but I definitely wouldn’t remove her from the team bc they’re not in a team. That would be selfish, unless it’s another reason he has behind it
NO! Let that girl cheer! I’m sure the other children have interests of their own when it comes to things like video games, art, collecting things, etc. If it is something that she takes interest in and is willing to do the work to get to where she is, do not discredit that and take it away! She would be heartbroken!
NO MAAM. I’m my opinion he’s not the one for your family or your kids if he can’t support your kids dreams the same way you would support his if they chose to play a sport. Shitty.
As your boyfriend/fiance whatever he should never ever ask you to that ever and don’t take your child off of cheering because she will grow thinking men can make decisions for you she’s work hard to be where she’s at now it’s not her fault he never put his children in sports you do you
I have no words. I would NEVER discourage a teen/child willing to put in the work for traveling sports. That takes tons of dedicating and discipline from a kid, whereas most kids don’t even bother. Don’t give it up momma. The other 3 kids might get jealous, or hell, your fiance might be jealous of the time spent away, but in the end, your daughter has busted her butt to be on a cheer team. Don’t let a man get in the way of that.
Let her cheer. It’s not unfair for the other kids. They could always say they want to do whatever sport and y’all could ask them if they want to but don’t punish your daughter for something that’s really not even about her. She hasn’t done anything wrong and I don’t see why y’all should take something she loves away from her when that could possibly get her a scholarship into college, do they have scholarships for cheer? And frankly I think he should get over it, I also think there maybe an underlying issue on his part.
they don’t travel because they don’t do a sport oh well let that baby cheer it’s hard work and she worked her way to earn her title don’t let her not cheer because your bf thinks it unfair to his kids because they choose not to I’d explain that pain as day your child to shouldn’t suffer because his kids dont to travel because THEY choose not to work for it nope let her cheer
How is it fair to kill a childs?dream due to how it makes the others feel. Personally itt wiuld turn me off that he even suggested it. Shows his level of maturity and problem solving. This could open doors for her in many arenas. Its a confidence builder as well as character. Each child is different to compare them is wrong.
Please do NOT stop , She has been uprooted and this could definitely help her with that transition. It is not your daughter’s or your fault the other kids CHOOSE WILLING TO NOT. Good luck hope everything works out. 
Do not make her stop. She loves it, and makes her happy. Please don’t take that away from her. And it’s a healthy hobby. Plus, it could lead to college scholarships for her.
He should be supporting her as much as you do! Period ! All the other kids will want to join in or try something too once they see both parents willing to invest into their choices !
Do NOT stop. As you said it’s probably the one thing keeping her grounded. I’d be seriously wondering what his problem is if he was wanting her to stop. Hard no. I wouldn’t of even considered it. He seems very immature and controlling.
No. You should not uproot her life because you chose to uproot yours. She may not be this passionate about another sport. Let her cheer, let her travel and have fun while doing it. And make sure to keep the bickering to a minimum around her so she doesn’t think she’s causing the arguments.
Definitely not! My daughter plays travel hockey and it’s wildly expensive and time consuming…my ex husband always wanted her to quit and doesn’t help pay at all…my new husband fully supports it and encourages it…and he knew she played when we met! If they didn’t get their kids into sports, that’s on them…does he know how much your daughter would resent him if she was made to give it up?!
No dont take her out of cheer especially with all that hardwork she put in. Its not your fault the other kids arent into sports. Sports isnt for everyone they kids can probably join something else. Growing up my brother and I kept my mom pretty busy with all our extra activities. I was into dance so I was in drill team and the dance company at school while my little brother did football and ran track.
My daughter is also on her 4th season of allstar so I totally understand what you are saying. Cheer is apart of our lives and the gym is my daughters second home(sometimes 1st since she’s there more than home). We know all the good that comes from cheer and us cheer moms know cheer is not “just cheer” so obviously my opinion is keep cheering lol.
Do not pull your child from cheer, you had to make difficult choices for your children already by moving, honestly I would tell him to go kick some rocks if he doesn’t like it 
. It’s not his choice & if you just moved in and he’s already on some control shit I would take that as a red flag 
he doesn’t get to change your choices in life for your children.
Let the child cheer. Not your fault he was a lazy parent and didn’t introduce his kids to sports or anything like that. Don’t punish her for it
Ask the other kids what they are passionate about and foster those skills my family was always into sports but I was never asked if i wanted to do anything and the things I did do were ripped away when I misbehaved so I never fostered those…it hurt me in the long run because now i have a fear of starting new things and fostering new skills please don’t RIP away cheer but do try to connect the 14 year old to something anything let them try new things but talk to them now
I have two daughters and I have been with my fiance’ for over 15 years. Most of the time he was our only source of income and he doesn’t have any children. My oldest was in traveling softball, park league softball, high school softball and volleyball, club volleyball and was a football cheerleader. Yes, it costs lots of time and money. My other daughter is more artsy and loves to sing and dance. Not one time did my man complain about ANYTHING my daughter’s wanted to do. Especially sports. My point is, my children have and always will be there and I for them because I am their mother. You can find another fiance’. They don’t get another childhood!! I bet if you think real hard about it. This isn’t the only thing he is jealous about. I just got one word… UNHEALTHY!
No let that baby do her! The other 3 will find something they are passionate about maybe your fiance should put his energy into helping them find what they like instead of stopping your daughter
Umm no, if she wants to do it let her. Not his choice on what she can do, it’s hers. She has done this for 4 years and still wants too, leave her be.
Absolutely no!! If she loves it and wants to continue then she should. He needs to stand up and support her or she will forever resent him.
Nope! Your fiancé, an unrelated person has no dog in that fight. He knew you came with children and a full life. His concerns about your parenting must come before you uproot your kids, not after. (Unless abuse is found)
No you should not make her stop. She shouldn’t be penalized because he chose to not involve his children in sports, or because they haven’t chosen to do so. That is her own thing, and she should be able to do it. Just like they would be allowed if they chose to do so. Please do not make her stop. I can’t even fathom that he thinks it is a problem.
Absolutely not…every child is different. My son is a national wrestler. There are 6 kids total. He is the only one who busted his ass to get to where he is. I will never take that away from him.
Girl no!!! Do not pull her from cheer, its not your fault his kids don’t do anything. Don’t take her passion and hard work away from her. You just keep supporting her momma, it sounds like she already had her life uprooted enough.
Personally, my kids would come first. (Especially in a second marriage)
Why should a child have to quit something they have worked so hard for?
I would never choose a man over my kids. Period.
Absolutly NOT he has his life and she has hers I would pick My Daughter over a ( Fiance) anytime if the kids love sports instead of setting in front of a TV you should support them (where is her father?)
Please dont take a passion from your child for what some man says.
Tell him he can put them in whatever he wants.
End of story.
Ask yourself how many things has he changed and controlled since living together, then you may have a whole new question, if not then maybe he really is just concerned about their feelings. Otherwise there may be many red flags with him.
That’s her passion & stopping would crush her dreams… I wouldn’t care what he has to say. My ex used to be mad at me cuz my kids had extra curricular activities and because his kids weren’t into, he said his kids are sad. Told him I never stopped his kids & that maybe he should let me help cuz I made my own money anyways. When he asked me to pay his child support and said would pay me back but never did. Tries to say we in this together. I simply said I don’t recall knocking her up. Plus he never helped me financially with my kids
Nope! Not at all! I’d support your kids (and his) for WHATEVER they wanna do especially if they are passionate about it! I definitely wouldn’t stop her from doing something she loves that’s healthy because his kids never did it! No way in hell!
As long as it doesn’t directly impact his life he has zero voice in this decision. He knew she did cheer before you moved in. Tell him to get over himself 
Absolutely not. I moved my oldest when he was in 4th grade. 5th grade came and he started football. I couldn’t always afford to go to the away games. But I always made sure he had money and a way to go. Busted my ass and not one thing do I regret. He played every year until he graduated and went to the army. Been over a year since I’ve seen him in person and he thanks me all the time for raising him as I did. I may not have always been there,but he knew I was cheering him on. My other 2 played football for a couple years but they have never been into sports the way my oldest has. Don’t discourage one just because they others aren’t active in sports.
I would say “so let’s get the kids into something” I wouldn’t entertain the idea of taking away something she worked so hard for
If he pushes it, you drop the man not the sport. Back your daughter. She has worked too hard for you to throw away her opportunities over a man.
I mean… he is your fiance… not her dad and to take something she loves, away from her because of the other kids will create resentment. And if he doesn’t support her maybe rethink some things.
Absolutely DO NOT make her stop. I was an all star cheerleader for world cup for years. It’s literally the 1 thing I love the most. Now my girls are just starting to cheer. If your daughter loves it and shes working hard… (which she is) and shes obviously good at it… dont rip something away from her that she loves… screw him. Hes gonna have to get over this. This would be my Hill to die on.
No do not pull her. Side note, he will wreck his relationship with her if he takes this from her. She’s working her butt off, that’s not right.
No!!! That would be so devastating!!! If that is what she us into then that is what she is into… Its even more of an escape now than ever before im sure, can’t take that away,
No, definitely not. This is something she’s earned. She shouldn’t have to stop because of your relationship. You’re right. They already had to move and upend their lives. Regardless of what his kids have or haven’t done it has nothing to do with your daughter. She is her own person.
You should move back, let her cheer and he raise his children his way. This isn’t going to go away.
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Do not take her away from it.
That’s the worst thing to do. Send her into a spiral or depression after moving her away from everything she knew then taking away the only thing she continues. Will be damaging.
Hubby needs to get over it or try to get the kids to do something too !
Tell him everything you told us w/o blaming him or the other kids. Let him and them know that if they want to do something they have your support as well. Sounds like a jealousy issue to me but that doesn’t mean tour daughter has to pay the price for it.
Nope. Keep her in it. That started before him……he doesn’t get to change her life just cuz his kids don’t want to do something like that. I can’t believe you’re even questioning it.
I wouldn’t get your daughter out of there because of that lol. That’s not fair to her to take her out of something she absolutely loves just because the other kids don’t get to travel.
Do not make her stop!! If you feel that cheer is what is keeping her grounded through all the changes, then definitely do not take that away from her because she needs that. Especially with all the time and effort and dedication that she has put into that sport, she has earned the right to continue cheering especially if it makes her happy. 
I would let her do it & maybe eve talk to your fiance about sitting the other kids down and offering them the chance do to something. Maybe they never asked for a reason they dont tell you. Just a thought.
Hell no! Do not make her stop. That is selfish on his part. He knew she did cheer when y’all decided to move in together.
Hell to the NO NO NO! Look no matter what you do they will always want to make you make sacrifices and after all is said and done it will never be enough. Then you will feel really stupid for sacrificing and you won’t be able to go back and undo all of your sacrifices. Speaking from experience!!! Stand by YOUR daughter…you are her MOTHER!!!
That’s weirdly controlling and a big no. Why should she have to give up what she loves because he neglected to get his kids into sports? Sounds like an ex fiance honestly.
My 2 daughters are in competitive dance, my youngest son is in hockey & my oldest son doesn’t do anything really. None of them complain about my daughters travelling to their competitions. In fact they love the hotels so they can go swimming & site seeing after
Do not choose a man over your child.
You’re not wrong. He is!
Keep her in cheer and move out if he refuses to understand. Don’t EVER choose a man over your child.
Because no one else has a passion for participation, she has to quit; her future step dad best get off his high horse and stop making decisions for y’all. That thinking does not end well. It’s what’s best for the child involved not the other way around. I was forced into sports and guess what? She never signed my permission slips to leave the campus, so all that practice was for nothing but fitness and I already had a phys Ed class.
No!! Im sorry but fuck that. Theres so much stuff the other kids can join that allows them to travel that isn’t even sports. Our robotics team traveled a lot. Drill team. Chess team etc. Thats not fair to your daughter.
Ummm let that baby CHEER! She wants to, loves it, spends hours practicing! It could be a way towards winning money for college or scholarships! Why stop ONE when the others aren’t interested?? If one of the others wanted to do competitive gaming or D&D or robotics I’m sure the SAME support would be there for them. Not all kids want to be athletic. Some prefer other avenues. Some are book nerds (saying that affectionately because I am one and so are my kids), some are interested in science or strategy games or composing music or designing video games or cooking or gardening or JUST being a teen and finding what they like and don’t like. 
why deny ONE who has been putting in work for their passion because the others have no interest? That’s NOT fair to stifle one because of the others.
Maybe see if any of them would be interested in martial arts? They get to learn to break boards and discipline. Maybe they want to be a competitive gamer! Maybe they don’t know what they like yet and ALL of that is OK!! People are individuals and ALL of the family should support any and all extra activities. Period.
No, she wants it, the others don’t. They’ll find something for them, if encouraged. Don’t punish her by taking it away…
She’s gonna hate you so much if you do this and I won’t blame her at all. Don’t be that mom that puts a man before her own children!!!
As long as you can afford to take her from this middle of no where place you live. But you shouldnt expect him to add to the amount of gas that youll be using to take your daughtee to and from these meetings in order for your daughter to participate… but if all 4 kids were to join something that meant having to be transported here and there could you both keep up with their schedules and always on time
No! She should get to do what makes her happy since it’s not hurting anyone at all.
That is very selfish of him to ask her to stop cheering.
Momma put your kid first.
Absolutely not. Shes doing something she loves and is dedicated to it. He sounds controlling and if you make her quit she will end up resenting that and could end up giving you a hard time too.
No… don’t pull her from anything!!! However, you may need to pull yourself away from - what seems to be your jealous, immature, hatin’ ass fiance! Not to mention controlling… Be grateful you don’t have a child together. Truly re-evaluate and decide if this is really a healthy relationship for YOU and your children to witness?!
She needs to continue cheer!! She has worked to hard to get where she is. That isnt right to rip her out.
Do NOT make her stop. If the other kids have no interest then it’s not a “they don’t get to” situation, it’s a “they don’t want to” situation. He can get over it.
Ummmm no and he’s out of line for even proposing u take her out … sounds jealous
Do not under any circumstances make her stop! The level of resentment she would feel towards you and your husband would be insane. Just don’t do it.
Don’t pull her out. I had to pull my daughter out of acro because of a move and she ended up majorly depressed with an eating disorder. It makes her happy and gives her something to do, do everything you can to keep her in it
No you shouldn’t make her stop mama, the way you explained it seems totally rational.
It’s not your or your daughters fault that the others aren’t into sports. If you’re paying for it out of your own pocket, it’s not coming out of his or effecting the other kids or household, then it’s not his problem to worry about
You are definitely not in the wrong take up for yourself and your kids and if he don’t like how you raise your kids leave! Y’all aren’t married yet
Absolutely not…. Let her continue, don’t take it away from her. He just has to understand. You have to do this now in the beginning or it will always be a problem
Hell no not her fault the other kids didnt join anything. Tbh it would look good on college apps as well. Why make her suffer
Let her keep cheering 100% as long as the other kids have the opprotunity to do somthing if they choose to then its completely fair
No way should she have stop just because he wants her 2
Your right keep it up! His could they chose not to. Let her cheer
Do not make her stop because of him she loves it so much don’t stop her it keeps her out of trouble and if you pull her out she will resent you and him both
No! Don’t stop her from doing what she loves.
At least she’s more active than his own kids.
Hell no, her activities and joys should not stop just because his kids don’t do any. That’s on him.
Why is he comparing children 
it sounds like he is jealous for his kids IMO and that would definitely concern me…2 out 3 my kids do sports (gymnastics and soccer) my third has never showed an interest and I definitely won’t make my other 2 stop because of that.
HELLO NO!
my daughter was asking to do anything and everything as soon as she could verbalize. I ended up trying gymnastics and swim at YMCA when she was pretty young (to check her interest in it) (I also feel swim is a vital life skill she needs to know, especially given she LOVES playing in the water, going fo water parks, and going to bodies of water). My fiance kids did wrestling for like 2 seasons and then decided they didn’t want to go after that. Him and his ex decided to allow them to quit and not see if they wanted to do or try anything else, they ended up getting into chess. My child does gymnastics classes a couple times a week, camps, swim, and she is asking to do/ try other things also. My fiance completely supports it and agrees to keep her in whatever she wants and to figure out the fiance that go with that. She works her butt off to learn new things, and is always bragging and showing off what she has learned and worked hard for. I would NEVER entertain the idea of taking her out of something she enjoys and loves and that can teach vital life skills. My fiance even picks up all of the extras without me even asking that I cant afford sometimes ( her biological father doesn’t help pay for anything, so it’s hard to keep up sometimes).
What you stated sounds very selfish in many different ways. Very self absorbed and he’s giving a bunch of excuses to his kids of why his kids can’t have something or do something because the money is going to your child?..that will turn on you eventually…
Absolutely not! But I would definitely offer to let the other kids tag along or join their sport of choice. Dad would definitely have to be on board because he would have to help with practice and stuff
So, if HIS kids haven’t done something your kids have, your kids have to miss out on things they like Doing? Not right!
He has the participation trophy syndrome. (If they all don’t get a trophy, no one can).
These are all older kids I’m assuming and not a 5 year old who understands but can’t really grasp it and will still be jealous. Me and both of my sisters all did competitive cheer. Once I stopped cheering and my younger sister continued I NEVER just assumed she would be made to stop because I don’t do it anymore. Why would it matter 
She should be able to still do cheer that’s something you was doing with her. I’d leave him if he gonna say she can’t do that cause what else is he gonna say you or them can’t do next
NO!!! You are not in the wrong. That shouldn’t even be a question for him to ask.
Hell no do not make her stop, why should she suffer because the other kids didn’t get into anything like it?
Did you know he felt this way before you moved in with him?.. I would not end the travel cheer…Nope.
Don’t make her stop. Tell kids to pick an afterschool group or sport if they’d like to do one. Not all kids do. But they can go to support their sister/ step sister at games if not then.
She shouldn’t be punished for your decisions of how to live your life. YOU chose to move in with your boyfriend. YOUR choosing to place him as her stepfather and he’s already showing you the redflags that what your kids NEED (cheer in general isn’t a need, but having some semblance of normality amongst all the changes IS) doesn’t matter to him and you’re still going to question it?
The issue you need to be questioning isn’t about whether or not to fight for your daughter to continue with cheer, but if your relationship is worth risking both the relationship with your children and any trauma that may come of them being forced into this union where your now other half doesn’t give a rats ass about your children’s well-being!
You better not take cheer away from her only because his ass is in his feelings about it.
Your kids come first. His attitude is a red flag.
I think it would be seriously messed up if she had to stop. She loves it.
Do not make her stop. Is he paying for it? He can promptly F off.
Red flag. Run away while you can.
She the favorite child. Are you living though her?
You know the answer already. That’s your job to help your kids follow their dreams. I hope he starts to understand.
Never. Tbh how dare he even suggest it?