My fiance stays up all night playing games with a girl he met online: Advice?

Hello im looking for advice on my fiance. Currently im 23 and he is 26. We currently have a 7 month old son and he also has a 4 year old son. Recently ive had no help with my sons care unless i beg him and then he just groans when having to help. Ive also had issues with him staying up all night playing video games with a girl he’s met online. He says they’re just friends but he’s on the game all day and night with her and when i had brought up that i had an issue with it it starts an argument. He’s always awful to me calling me names… He never wants to spend time with his family and is awful horrible towards me when he does. Im at my wits end and dont know what to do. I just need some advice

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Step 1 : find a man. A real man does not play video games non stop. This is because he has a a job and would rather spend the time with family on the little downtime he has. Stop complaining about men who show you who they are on day 1. You knew he played games over you from the beginning… you thought you could change him. Grow up and know your worth. You deserve better… leave him to his fantasy life. I doubt he will even notice you are gone.

Help a mama out and respond anonymously on our forum. https://answers.mamasuncut.com/t/my-fiance-stays-up-all-night-playing-games-with-a-girl-he-met-online-advice/21138

Is it my sister in-law lmao :joy:

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You have to face the music… No respect… Time to kick him to the curb… Please learn to love yourself

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Red flags !!! Throw the whole man out. You deserve so much more!!!

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Sounds to me like you should leave. Just because you have a child together doesn’t mean you’re obligated to stay with him. You should leave before your son gets older and picks up on the negative behavior towards you and thinks it’s okay to treat people like that.

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Oh honey. I’m sorry, but that’s dangerous. Trust me. You are in a bad situation. I’d leave before you son get older
Don’t make the same mistake i did. He won’t change.

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I feel like he’s mentally checked out. I wouldn’t sit and tolerate this abuse personally but I know it’s easier said then done to walk away. It took me along time to know my worth and know I deserved better when I left. My kids father was involved in the parenting and never cheated but the way he treated me wasn’t worth that. We work better apart then together. Something to consider.

I know you don’t want to hear this…but leave. If he is 26 and doing that shit he’s not going to grow up, or the only thing that will make him I you leaving

If it’s like this now, imagine when you get married. I would not marry him and you should find someone who deserves you

Kick him to the curb.

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Umm run as fast as you can

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Those boots are made for walking. Get to stepping

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Girl don’t waste your younger years on him… Leave and if he wants his family bad enough, he will change if not move on!

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Honestly it gets worse I’d run now while you can.

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This happened to me. He even brought the video games to the hospital when I was giving birth to our son. Turns out they were seeing each other the entire time. Once I left for a much needed break because all he did was play games and sleep, I went to our house to pick up more clothes for my son and I and her clothes were strewn all across the house where they were having “sex”. Moved her in shortly after that. Don’t waste your time!!

How is it that you chose to have a kid with a man like that? No respect means he gotta go.

First, I’d make him no longer a fiancé and kick him to the curb. You and your son should be a priority over some game and woman he’s met online. Doesn’t matter if something is going on or not. It’s wrong when he’s choosing that over spending family time with y’all and his son! If he’s this horrible now how will he be when y’all get married. Don’t ignore the red flags!

You Deserve so much better than that. It’s not very fair to expect you to handle everything why he can sleep play games and not have to attend to his responsibilities men can be very selfish sometimes they need to be reminded they want to act like a little boy then they can be a little boy and you have to set boundaries for yourself make him respect you and follow them if not then maybe you should find someone that will treat you right and your children

Red flags everywhere! Get out!!

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He aint no man, he is another kid you are raising…tell him to kick rocks

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Id tell him your unhappy n explain why if he doesnt listen then id leave him. Life is too short for crappy relationships n being miserable.

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Leave him to his computer games and online gf. You deserve better and so does the child

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Sounds like you need to get a new fiance. Why even ask the question? why are you even putting up with any of that BS? You deserve better and you shouldn’t have to tell him or complain or argue about what he is or is not doing when it comes to you and his children.

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Bye bye time for him to go

He’s older than you and is obviously the immature one. Actions like that are not worth your stress nor time. I’ll be damned if my bf tried to play video games with some chick because more time spent together the more connections there are. If he can’t respect you enough to stop then tell him your done!

Time to split up with him it’ll never get any better. Sounds like in his mind he already has.

Leave??? Why would you allow it

He sounds like a pretty immature little boy. It’s unfortunate that you are co-parenting with this child. I used to have a son-in-law like that. He hasn’t seen his daughter in 12 years. She’s 12. He has about as much maturity as she does. It’s time to put the games down and play Life.

Just leave him, you’ll be much happier

Change the wifi password :woman_shrugging:t2:

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Get away now he’s not changing find a way out

What?? Does her not work?

Hes showing you his true self. I would leave before you get married and its 10 times harder to.

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Grown men don’t play video games hahah. Enough said. Lol

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Not good babe, not good at all!! Don’t waste your time or your childs

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MINK MINK MINK MINK BOOP BOP because whatttttt

And you’re going to marry this guy?

Ultimatum…game or real life.

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Leave… You deserve better

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I left my husband because all he did was game in his free time and had anger issues. We hadn’t had kids. I just knew I deserved better. Threaten to leave his ass if he don’t shape up and be a woman of your word.

If this was your friend or sister what would your advice to them be? Honestly it sounds like he’s already checked out. I would either leave or provide him some sort of ultimatum good luck

Kick him out… you need a man not a video game playing baby… you and your child do not deserve this

Wow! Don’t know what to do???

You know the answer.

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:triangular_flag_on_post::triangular_flag_on_post::triangular_flag_on_post: Boy bye! I say that cuz he’s acting like a little boy. U deserve better.

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Girl, if you’ve voiced how you feel about these things and he doesn’t care, it’s time to go. Don’t waste time and effort on someone that isn’t willing to do the same for you!

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Communication… tell him exactly how you feel and what will happen if he doesn’t reduce his time on his game. The baby ain’t just your responsibility its his too… manchild springs to mind. If he doesn’t change boot him to the curb, your worth more. Does he work and help provide for himself and to Contribute towards house and baby costs :thinking:

Reach out to the girl and ask what is going on.

give him to her. she can finish raising him

Good bye and good riddance

As hard as it is, end this with him. Life’s too short to be with someone you fight with all the time. And he’s not great to you, that won’t change just because you hot married… it will get worse.

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Put your foot down you and your son should be his first priority! I’ve been married for 23 years will be 24 Dec. 26 and we have 7 kids and 6 grandkids and my husband helps and helped with our kids bc they are our kids

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So many red flags. If he’d rather be gaming with her than living in real life with you and your family, it’s time he met the curb.

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Dip :joy:boy obsessed with internet coochie :joy::joy:

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He’s a child … you have three children… :weary:

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He sounds like such a loser! Let him go and move on!! You and your child deserve better.

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Oh! So one upon a time, I worked, went to school and had two babies, while their father, my darling fiancee sat on his game day and night and told these poor girls that I was dead and left him with the babies to raise all by his lonesome self. He didn’t work a job, my daughter’s diaper would be full when I got home from work, and he hit me because I wanted him to be a man. Lol. Go. Leave immediately.

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You have to leave or make him go. That is verbal abuse. Also if he isn’t contributing to the family he created what is he there for? As for the girl it could be harmless but by his reaction it’s not. Just remember your children are watching and learning how they should act and be treated in a relationship.

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Girl leave while you can. And don’t get married, because it’ll be sooo much harder! I’ve been through it myself.

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Sounds like you are dealing with a boy and not a man. I’d tell him to get out

Remember the Watts family

I think u know exactly what u need to do

leave i have learned if he has a “gamer girl friend” then he is cheating emotionally with her.

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Oh no no no :triangular_flag_on_post: you know in your gut that regardless of how far it’s gotten with this person, he’s not doing his due diligence by you and the kids. A conversation about your feelings should never be an argument and I am so so sorry that it is :disappointed: you’re already doing this alone… you’re going to have to make some very hard decisions here because shit needs to change, if he can’t have a conversation without an argument- perhaps make an appointment at a couples counsellor? Cause this is deal breaker shit. You don’t need this. I raised two kids on my own (younger than you, you youngest turned 20 a couple days ago) and I’ll tell you something I enjoyed it so much and I had no grief because I had no damn man making me crazy!

Best advice I can offer- don’t marry him. Leave him and find someone who is ready to be an adult. Because when you have babies, you need to be an adult. It doesn’t sound like he is going to do that.

sorry my advice would be the same as the other girls. i,am 83 and have experienced it wont change with time.

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If he is horrible to you we don’t even need to know the rest… “boy bye”

Honestly after seeing a million of these gamer boyfriend and husband stories I’m convinced that no one should date a guy with a Xbox anymore lol

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First of all if he’s such an a$$hole wtf are you still there?! Also just cause he plays doesn’t mean he’s always playing with her… That’s his escape from reality and his way of dealing with his issues rather than facing them… Also just because he’s plays a video game doesn’t mean he’s a boy or a man child… You need to really sit down and have a conversation with him and try to understand where hes coming from if he does open up…

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Leave and don’t look back

Tell him you want to sit down and talk like mature adults tell him how you feel and if he doesnt put in some serious effort to change his behavior leave if he just wants to argue about it and yall cant talk maturely then get yourself out of the situation he definitely doesnt need to talk badly to you you deserve better and you deserve someone that chooses you always ask him whats going on with him maybe hes going through something too or are yall having other problems? Sounds like hes checked out mentally and emotionally maybe either way if the behavior doesn’t change leave before it becomes more toxic and your kids have to go through more than they already have

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I would def not be getting married :woman_shrugging:t2:

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Sounds familiar Ashley Bowling

This is beyond familiar to me, leave. It isn’t going to change.

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From experience, the anger and defensiveness when things like this are brought up, are usually because of guilt. He sounds horrid, please don’t marry this man without SIGNIFICANT change. For you and your baby !

Easiest way to fix this problem is find a guy to talk to or pretend… see how he likes it.
Tell him how your just friends with this guy and he has offered to take you to.lunch ect and when he starts an argument remind him that playing with a girl all night long is no better :grin::grin:

If your tryna tell him how you feel about it and it’s ending in an argument it’s not worth it your expressing how you feel matters and this guy is too busy on his games with some random chick !! To acknowledge his kids and you !

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Leave! Verbal abuse, selfishness and a clear lack of priorities! If you don’t believe you deserve better then think about your child

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It’s called an emotional relationship and he’s getting all his emotional/ fun needs from her. It’s a form of cheating. I’d leave, clearly he craves her and would rather spend time with her. I’m sorry you’re going through this. :broken_heart:

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Change the wifi password and don’t tell him what it is until he agrees to have a sit down with you to discuss the issues you see that you’re having.

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Ask if you can play too see what he says if he flips out then theres probably more to the story

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Simply don’t marry him and get the hell out while you can.

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The game itself wouldn’t be my problem, I mean there needs to be balance, time for games, time for family. But it’s the girl that would be my concern. Because I’ve watched people “fall” for these online people :joy: no way.

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I know most peoples gut reaction would be to leave him. I suggest y’all do premarital counseling. It sounds like he has a lot of growing up to do! If he’s not willing to make changes, I definitely say kick him to the curb… you do NOT want to be 30, 40 years old mad at yourself for staying with him!

Just leave, you and your child deserves better!

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Sounds immature, abusive and narcissistic.

Those boys will be better off growing up away from all that.

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My ex husband did this once we we were engaged I took his Xbox and slammed it outside in the middle of the road I wa also pregnant with his second son

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I’d leave. Sounds like he needs some Maturity

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Oh I just finished reading your status… girl, id just leave him… but id tell him uve left for another guy u met online :rofl:

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Do not marry him! Seek counseling first. Marriage can come much later

Move on, clear red flags hun.

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I was in a similar situation recently and I left. I couldn’t be happier. I suggest you do the same.

Run now, it doesn’t get better.

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Kick his ass to the curb…you deserve better.

Walk away hun don’t waste your life on someone who doesn’t want to give u what you need! Father of your kid or not!

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Leave him. Like yesterday!!!

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Leave, that’s not right or fair, he needs a vasectomy as well since he’s obviously not father material, and that’s an emotional affair he’s having with the girl he’s wasting time gaming with.

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Yea pretty sure you don’t want advise lol you want to peer approval for your anger. That being said you know your choices sorry don’t mean to sound harsh but…

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