Sounds like you had a baby with a child
They are for your baby. Not his from another mother
He’s a selfish, immature jerk, time to move on, leave him.
This man is still operating as a batchelor.
Well , I see why he’s divorced….
Most of y’all missing the the fact that the cards were addressed to both not just him. So the cards are for them
Why did you breed with this dumbass??!
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Grown men really think like this? Wow
Get out ! That ain’t love or a relationship. T
Run & run fast! Get out while you still can!
Shouldn’t have let him cum in you. Get out while you are still alive.
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The restaurant gift cards were really the only gift cards meant for you guys so wtf is he talking about the other 1s were for the baby to buy whatever the baby needs or is going to need their not for him and his kids their for your guys baby… I suggest you leave his punk ass now u and your baby deserve better… Ask him why he thinks its OK to steal from a baby and his baby at that because that’s exactly what he’s doing… Im a stay at home mom I am not married to my S/O but we have been together almost 8 years he pays for everything and I take care of our home and child but if I did work the money I made wouldn’t be my money it would be our money just as the money he makes is our money we wouldn’t split things down the middle we would put all the money together pay for our lives because its our lives not just his or mine…
That would have been my sign to leave … he is a loser
Look within yourself, the answer is clear.
Don’t marry that man.
Omfg 
they are only gift cards. Pick your battles.
Got yourself a grade A loser.
All I’ll say is that I would not marry him.
I see a little greed there !!!
There is a lot more going on here than gift card distribution. He paid you back for the baby gear? That doesn’t sound like co-parenting to me. It sounds like he’s completely detached from you and this baby. If he’s this selfish over gift cards, what’s going to happen when your time is devoted to the baby and not him? I see some serious red flags here and I’m not qualified to give in-depth advice, you need a counselor and if he’s not willing, you’re in a situation that’s never going to be healthy for you or the baby.
Edited to add: I’m curious, who’s paying for the wedding/courthouse fees (depending on the route you chose)? Is that being split 50/50 too or is he content to let someone else pay for the nuptials? Because that’s pretty indicative of his priorities also.
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Leave. You aren’t in a relationship.
Look up narcissistic… Sorry hun.
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Tell him to grow up.
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Yo bro the moment he refers to you guys baby as your family it’s time to bounceeeee tfffff is wrong with him.
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Get out while you still can.
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please dont marry him.
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well, you the one that went to bed with this clown, even after knowing he has spawn with other women
Those gift cards were a gift to you both for the baby and used for you guys and the baby he is being beyond selfish
Well, looks like that explains why he has "previous marriages"
Run girl! He is selfish and you don’t need another “child” to care for!
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They are for you him and this new baby. So what I would suggest is tell him that you want to go ahead and buy size 1 diapers to be prepared and that a case of them is blank amount of money with a case of wipes being blank amount of money and he can hand you that cash or he can hand you the gift card to get them from Amazon if that’s the one he kept.
So you need to tell him that he will be responsible for buying groceries cooking the meals or ordering out paying for it to be delivered and paying for the meal during your hospital time your first few days at home and your six weeks when you’re not working so make sure he understands he’s responsible for that if he keeps the restaurant ones.
Remember when dealing with a man is kind of like dealing with children you have to use common sense and talk to them sort of like you’re making a deal.
If you have to play this game with him just remember to remind him before you buy he needs to hand you the cash money because he kept that card write down the value write down the card and before you spend that money he pays you in cash for that item. Just my opinion. 33 years of one marriage and 13 of the next three children all grown and gone
He is very selfish. Shame it didn’t show up before marrying him.
I would seriously use the 6 weeks l am home with MY newborn to revaluate a life with this man. From what u have told us, doesn’t seem to me he’s very committed to you and this baby…why did his first marriage fail? Sending prayers for you… remember, u have a child to consider now as well…good luck to you! Be blessed
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He sounds like a selfish prick to be honest lovely, fair enough he wants to treat his other kids BUT I’m sure when they were in the womb they were showered with presents and gifts too. It’s your babies turn now! Also it doesn’t seem to me like a partner ship at all, it’s sounds very like “you take care of yourself and ile take care of me” xxxx
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This is why you don’t have kids with someone your not actually married to and sharing everything with… selfish man who doesn’t value your relationship or you being a mother to one of his kids…
They are for the both of you to help when the baby comes that’s whole point to be used on the baby
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Name and shame him lol how embarrassed would he be?
Doesn’t sound like he’s commited to you relationship. It sounds like he thinks of you as two separate entities not as a couple.
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Sounds like money is more important to him than you and his baby
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Sounds like a f*cking douchebag! Sorry you have to deal with that, this is just a preview of the future with him…gtfo of there 
This is called financial abuse. It’s a very real thing and will slowly progress into mental and emotional abuse. Don’t let this happen. Partnerships are meant to be an equal thing, where you should be able to sit down and discuss your finances and things like that comfortably and maturely. If he can’t he’s an immature person who should not be having children. Baby gifts are meant for babies and for the couples to use together. Ordering in meals TOGETHER, etc.
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Help a mama out and respond anonymously on our forum. My fiance thinks baby gift cards are for him to spend on himself: Advice?
Deffo a twat move imo
Your fiancé sounds like a dick
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That fiancé would be an ex.
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Not to be mean but I think you chose the wrong person to have a baby with. He sounds like a selfish twat
Surely this is a joke?
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Why is he your fiancé?
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He most probably thinks his boss his cards and when your boss does the same your boss your cards.
So many red flags one would think a carnival was in town
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Throw the whole man in the garbage
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Run, don’t walk, the HECK away from this loser
I think you might want to reconsider your choice of men. It’s only going to get worse. If he can’t see your sacrifice he’ll never respect or honor you. Your child will pick up on it and treat you just the same. Run girl run!
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i hate to say it but he sounds like a very selfish self absorbed man
if he’s like this before the baby is born I imagine he will be worse after. and it will be you footing all the costs of bringing your child up and any childcare etc
you may be better off on your own
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It sounds like he’s just someone that got you pregnant and not someone you’re engaged to. Please don’t legally bind yourself to someone so selfish about gift cards that would not have even been given to him if yall didn’t have a new baby coming. Plus that shit had your name on it too so it’s obviously for the BOTH of you. I can’t imagine my husband being so petty 
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This all sounds very odd. Everything is “his” and “mine” to him while you are thinking about a unit. Def not on the same page and thats where i would start… other than tht he sounds like a self absorbed prick to be honest.
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This is a toxic relationship it sounds like with a LOT of baggage prob on both sides…and I don’t think Facebook is gona help what’s going on here. You and him need to see a counselor and sift thru all this or separate. This isn’t healthy.
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If those 3 are for your baby, than they aren’t for you or HIM either. If the baby gets half the gift cards than the other half should be for BOTH of you. The baby belongs to both of you, it’s both of yours responsibility to care for, using a gift cards for baby stuff gives the month to both of you as much as it takes it away. Honestly if he’s gonna be a huge tool about it I say the baby gets the store gift cards, you get a restaurant card, he gets one, and then you both have one to share. I’d also stop having kids with this dude as he sounds super selfish and self centered
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Oh wow this doesn’t sound like y’all are married at all. That stuff is for the baby, you aren’t wrong. The restaurant cards are like the only thing remotely not for a baby. Even then he shouldn’t be saying “it’s mine” how selfish.
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Sounds like he’s not very responsible and I am sad for you that you didn’t have a in-depth conversation about money and pregnancy issues beforehand. Tell him giving you those cards now for the baby will be cheaper than going to court for child support. Good luck.
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I would honestly get out of the relationship now those gift cards are not for his personal use nor his other kids plain and simple this situation will only get worse he is showing his true colors
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Post started out wrong with the word fiance. Honey, that’s not how someone you’re going to marry acts. he sounds very selfish and immature. In terms of the gift cards, I have to say I think you’re being completely reasonable. Those cards were meant for the baby, not for him or his other children from prior marriages. He wouldn’t want someone using his gifts that were intended for a specific purpose to use them on themselves.
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You two are having a baby and you can’t share gift cards? Petty. Poor child.
Aren’t you a family? I’m not married to my partner, not even engaged, and we share everything, money is just money at home, not “mine and yours”. What kind of dynamics do you have and what made you think you two should raise a person?
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A relationship is about giving and sharing and caring. He seems to care….about himself. Seems very selfish and not at all about the family unit, only himself. I’ll bet he uses “I” a lot instead of we. Sadly you are having a baby with someone that in the future will not have your back as years take a toll on relationships. If he is not loving and selfless now, when then? This is a time for loving and joy and sharing in the happiness. The dinners should be for both of you. The other cards strictly for baby needs. He sounds like a class A jerk and I’m sorry he is your fiancé. Things do not get better once the child is here. You can see that from the fact he has children with someone else and it didn’t keep them together. Maybe she got wise to him! I’m sorry you have a person that would not put you and the baby first over his own selfishness. Sounds like he needs to grow as a person a bit
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Not to sound rude, but it seems like he has other priorities. He should be helping you out more, be more supportive, and be with you and the baby. I’ve dealt with some one like that in the past but worse because he drank and gambled. It seems like someone else is more important in his life than I and the baby. And if he has other kids, he’s doing the same to you as he did to them.
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Rethink relationship. Get financial/relationship counseling. If he refuses go for yourself & make your own decisions going forward! Life is too short & precious to be accommodating someone this inconsiderate for the next 30-60 years. You deserve better! 
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A real man would make sure you and the baby have everything you need.
I really want to speak to this boy.
Do not marry this man and I’d suggest moving out asap. In with family or something fast away from him.
Don’t pay for anything!
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He sounds kinda toxic ngl. The whole point in the gift was aiding in costs for THIS BABY. Not for previous children. Not for just him. He sounds way too self involved to be ready for marriage. He won’t even be your life partner enough to cover bills after you miss 6 weeks pay and have gone through BIRTHING HIS CHILD? Girl. Run. I mean it. If he can’t take care of you and the baby now when you’re gonna need that time healing and the baby is gonna be brand new, how will he be a decent husband? I’d be questioning what went wrong in his first marriage and how many lessons he still has to learn from it…
Wishing you blessings and safety while you figure it out. The whole thing sounds so unfair and unjust.
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I encourage couples therapy. So many money issues can be avoided that way. It’s the number one cause of divorce so I highly suggest therapy. In my opinion I think that’s incredibly selfish of him. Also, you guys are going to get married and normally that means what’s mine is yours and yours is mine when it come to $$. Good luck with everything!!
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I think you guys have much bigger problems than gift cards. Is this a couple having a baby or a business deal gone wrong? You need to both put this new baby in front of your own needs.
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Selfish and petty on his part. Maybe all of you can go out to eat - as a unit… I’d run tho…this sounds like years of heartache waiting for him to “change”… people do not change…
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Toxic!
And i feel so bad seeing women write stuff like this!! I mean the stories be the BIGGEST red flags ever. Moms you have to love yourself and your children. No man’s love will be greater then your children. protect them now . save them now. save you the heartache thats yet to come. all of these women and moms here can tell you to leave him all day but you wont until YOUR ready! we would just like that to be sooner rather then later…
I help women in this position ALL the time, because it was once me. I too went back to him after leaving. They all (including myself) kept/keep continuing to make excuses. Im a stay at home mom. He will change. Maybe its me. I dont have money. I wont make it without him. I have no family or friends. I have no where else to go. etc. These are ALL excuses. No excuse, is a good excuse to remain with someone like that. He’s literally showing you he doesnt care about you or the brand new baby. He will more then likely not help either will middle of the night feedings, and cleaning/maintaining the house. And when you complain or say something about it, he’s going to say your home all day every day… you need to be cooking, cleaning, and caring for the baby. Just watch.
its really sad. but men are immature. i’d cut my ties now and RUN! do not marry this man. he does not have you or your baby’s best interest at heart!
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My only advice is to not put his name on the birth certificate 
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If you have a marriage where you’re not a team, and it’s all split like yours and mine, what’s the point. And this is on both ends. You’re saying you bought all the baby stuff and he paid you back half, and he’s trying to have his gift cards and your gift cards. You’re not a team why are you married and having kids?
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There is usually no instructions from the giver on how to spend “baby gift cards”. But it’s only logical they are given to help lessen the expenses a new of baby brings and can include the baby’s parents.
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What in the hell did I just read. ? Are two grown adults really arguing over gift cards ?
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If this relationship has seperate spending as a family you have many issues besides giftcards that need working on.
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Girl, don’t marry him. I’m sure he was a problem before y’all got pregnant. And he wants to use the other cards for his other kids from previous marriage(s)?? I had a different comment, but I’ll save it- this is pretty sad. Stack your money and be ready to do most of this on your own I’m sure you’re going to marry him anyway, I just hope you remember this thread…
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Take all the gift cards along with all your stuff while he’s at work and leave 
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He doesn’t sound like someone I want a baby with lol
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And you are hooked to him for at least the next 18 years and longer?? Can you not see the writing on the wall?? He is expressing exactly the person you are getting…SMH
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This makes me sad… because the proof’s in the pudding. Also weird everything is so divided, you’re suppose to be a team. Drop him before he becomes your husband. If he’s not willing to make sacrifices now do you really think he’ll turn around after the baby’s born?
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Not meant for his personal use, meant for all if you and baby, being selfish
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Run girl run. Things will only get worse. I can 99 % guarantee he won’t take off work if the baby gets sick, he won’t take the baby to dr, dentist appointments and will probably not give you anytime for yourself. Meaning you will hear I can’t watch it I am watching the game or hanging out with friends or spending time with my other kids. Plan on being a single parent. GET AWAY FROM HIM.
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Those are definitely not for any other kid than the new baby…wtf
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“Half of the bills”. Once married there is no “half”, its whoever’s got it, got it" you both take care of eachother whenever need be. I wouldn’t marry him
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Something wrong with this, maybe why ge is divorced
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It’s no wonder why you guys are divorced from other marriages already. This is not that serious of an issue.
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I’m sorry… but how did this guy become your husband? Let alone the father of your baby?
This is saddening and I hope you can find a way out of this toxic relationship.
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Each relationship works different
But normally when gifts are given that way - they are for the two of you together
To buy stuff when needed - the restaurant ones would be ( probably ) for the 2 of you for date night
6 cards from an employer is a very awesome gift though - many don’t get anything
And why are you not getting paid - most companies offer STD for delivery 6 vaginal and 8 c section and it’s normally 60%
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Tell him if he has any questions to ask the people that gifted it to him who it’s for 
should clear any confusion right on up. As for you: consider leaving this man.
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Girl… If he won’t be logical with you on deciding what happens with the baby shower gifts… RUN while there’s the time!! Man, I wish my soon-to-be husband would pull some mess like this. Not trying to overreact but Red Flag. I’ve been married for almost 12 years and I’m 30. I’m telling you he’s about to be a headache.
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Take my word, And get out now
Don’t wait he is going to get worse!! Never will change, however if you do stay you have been warned by a lot of extraordinary women on this thread, please take their advice…
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The gifts were for both of you. He doesn’t get to keep any and spend them on himself
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Lol. Even the gift cards I get for bdays or what not go to the family. What a chump.
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Uh yall about to have major issues when the baby comes whose paying for it!? Lol no offense but this dude is in for a major reality check
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I guess you’re not in a relationship that deals with both parties being equal. Its called immaturity!
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I think you have a bigger problem than these gift cards. If a marriage ever does take place you can expect him to always treat you like a 50% partner. Does he do 50% of cooking, cleaning & will he do 50% of the baby care including those night time feedings. He treats this like a business deal & not a loving relationship. If you are always expected to work will he pay 50% of child care expenses or will that be 100% yours too. If you are going to have to raise your baby almost like a single Mom then you might as well be one…but get that child support! And why must food be delivered…can’t he do the shopping…or is that 100% your job?
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If he was going to be financially supporting you while you’re at home for the 6 weeks, I could ALMOST understand why he would want to keep a food card or two for himself. But he isn’t. You are willing to sacrifice 6 weeks of pay for you’re baby. You apparently still have to pay “you’re half of the bills” while out of work, but you’re fiancée isn’t even willing to share all the gift cards he got for you and the baby?!! I’m normally pretty open minded when people complain about their SO on these groups . I try to think about things from both sides. In this case however , I don’t see how his actions can be interpreted in any way other than extremely selfish. I’d really evaluate your fiancé as a person before you marry him. You can split bills 50/50 with a roommate. What else does he bring to the table? If nothing of real value comes to mind, you might have a real problem.
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Yea… this has future problems written all over it. If there wasn’t a baby coming he wouldn’t have gotten the cards.: they are for family and baby obviously… it all sounds like a nightmare
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My thought is he has his best interest at heart, NOT your kid. Dump him.
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