Leave it be. She’s got two daddies at this point. She knows the difference at that age… don’t confuse the child any further. He’s been there for 6 years.
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Always should be up to the child.
I would never allow it.
If they want to call their step-mom, ‘mom’, I have no problem with it. But if they want to call her by her name, they better be allowed to do that also.
My boyfriend and I have been together 7 years, my girls were 1 and 4 when we started seeing each other, and they still call him by his name. They probably always will. And that’s okay.
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“She’s not allowed to call him daddy with us.” This poor child.
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My 2 older boys call my S/O dad/daddy my oldest son’s dad isn’t around much but tried to say something about it when he stepped in for a month or 2 a few years ago but I shut that shit down real quick yo ass ain’t acting as daddy he can call whoever daddy he feels is acting as a dad to him… And then my 2nd son his dad is super active he was upset about our son calling my s/o dad but he’s fine with it now our son is 6 and has been calling my s/o dad as long as he’s been able to talk. Me him and his dad just had a conversation yesterday when I dropped him off about how all weekend bub wanted to play games with daddy 
and how he watched mommy and daddy play it takes two 
Honestly no one should be forcing her to say it, but if she chooses then he will have to get over it and realize that he is daddy to her to and you have zero say in the matter
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Please for a moment— remove the ADULT issues from this child’s mind and put yourselves in HER shoes. You are putting her in such a tough spot and making her feel like she has to choose. This child has known this man her entire 6 years as a father figure. Has lived with him primarily (with mom) and has arguably spent more time with this man than her own biological father. Like it or not— he is a dad too. Don’t let the petty adult emotions cloud this babies mind. Don’t make her aware of YALLs issues. If she calls him dad in your home— so be it— as long as she is loved and cared for in both households— that’s all that should matter. Do better!
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I would say grow up and let the kid be. I feel as if you are letting unreasonable emotions get in the way of the bigger picture. The bigger picture is not letting your toxic traits effect the kids involved… it’s really not that big of a deal considering he has been in her life since she was a baby… you can’t control everything but you can control/work through your own emotions. Are you upset she doesn’t call you mom? This could be why you are blowing it out of proportion.
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I willingly called my step dad “ dad “ “ pops” and my bio dads lame family would always talk shit to me when I would go over for summer vacation I lived in EP I had to visit to colorado and they would treat me like shit and tell me “ call your daddy to come get you since you like him so much “ milesssss away and up till this day I hate them with a passion .
Yes I still call my step dad ( dad) rip 
and my bio can f* himself .
But if she’s FORCED to call him that then that’s weird
I think this is a little selfish. Unfortunately if this man raised her since the baby and lives with her during the week, he’s taking on a father we roll. It may be hard for her biological father, but guilt tripping a 6-year-old or forcing them to change their family dynamic because his feelings are hurt is very selfish. Just tried to strengthen the bonds with her biological father she can have two dads. There’s not a certain number of people that kids can love. If you try to stop her from calling the other one dad she will just build resentment.
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Grow up that kid has two dads period!!! Try to work together in her life, maybe you can be mom also. All of you can show love and not tell that child who they can and can’t
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If the child isn’t complaining, then why are you?
Petty…
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I don’t think the child should be FORCED to call him dad, but y’all shouldn’t throw a fit over it either. If he’s a good man, loves and provides for the child, then you should be thankful that your child has someone else who loves her.
You can’t really control anything that goes on in her mothers house. If you wanna be petty though, have her start calling you mom.
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There’s other stuff to focus on. I was a stepchild and I called my stepdad “dad” when I was younger. Granted he is a good man and wanted to be sure I knew who my dad was though. My dad didn’t mind it. Forcing a child to call someone dad though or not allowing them to call whomever they choose dad/mom seems a bit iffy to me. My daughter calls her stepdad “dad”. She chose to do so. I’d never force her to call him one thing or the other. The bio is also not in the picture though so slightly different. Would you be upset if she called you mom?
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You can’t control what’s happening in the child’s other home.
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Be a grown up and think of the child. That man will be doing everything that a dad does so if she wants to call him dad then you have zero rights too stop her
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My 2 oldest boys lost their mom in a car accident in 2015 I raised them on my own until I met my wife… (we aren’t married I just call her my wife) but they started calling her mom within a couple of months I wasn’t mad or jealous I was happy my boys found someone who they trusted just much as their mother…
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You aren’t her mom. You shouldn’t be worried about it.
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Okay. Are they making her? Or are they just allowing it because the child views him as a father figure because he’s been one for 6 God damn years? I can tell you now. Grow up or that child will grow up and see how petty y’all are being and will resent you for it. I couldn’t ever imagine telling my kids they are not allowed to call their step mom mommy after the 4 years she’s put in with them for them to view her that way. I remember my dad use to get mad at me and my mom for me calling my step dad daddy and I grew up so hurt and confused and resentful for it. A step parent is just another person to love the child. Also since it’s your exs kid and your not okay with her calling her step dad daddy, best hope you ain’t trying to be a new mommy then as that would be hella hypocritical.
Would it be difffrent if u was being called mom I mean it’s not that big of a deal she knows her dad from her step dad
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I’m sorry but who the hell are you to have an issue with anything?
That man has been taking care of your fiancés child since she was a baby.
Maybe you & your fiancé should grow up & THANK that man for loving & providing for her.
Don’t push your insecurities onto that sweet little girl.
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I have 3 step kids and I’ve always told them they can call me whatever they want. My eldest wants to call me Mum (he asked me if he’s allowed to and if I don’t mind), I told him he is welcome to call me that if HE wants to. The 2 younger ones flip back and forth between Mum and Sam… it doesn’t bother me at all if they want to call me by my name.
My fiancé and I have an 8 week old daughter together, so my fiancé refers to me as mum now, but the kids still have a choice to call me whatever they’re comfortable with.
***note: they don’t see their bio mum in person at all, for safety reasons. We have final court orders with sole parental. So I understand if they want to call me mum, but they’ll never be forced to
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The child should choose what she wants to call him. If she does call him dad because he’s been in her life so long then there’s nothing wrong with that. Just because you’re a biological parent doesn’t give you the right to be called mom or dad if you’re not a good parent. There are people out there raising kids who aren’t their biological kids who are being called mom or dad because their bio parent is scum. Let the child choose
Pls stop complicating life for the poor child…its between her mother and her father…you and the boyfriend should stay out of it…i feel for that child…my daughter was once in thatt situation and it really messes them up…butt out
Let her call whoever whatever and don’t put anymore pressure on this poor kid. She has 2 daddy’s so what. Don’t force anything in your house that’s essentially just selfish butthurt feelings. You may want to just gently ask the ex to not force anything either
I say mind your business
Not your kid, not your business. If her dad has an issue HE needs to deal with it with the child’s mother.
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If he treats her like his own allow it or she will remember. My two bonus babies asked to call me mom because they wanted too, I however called their mom and spoke to her about it before I allowed it. my 2 I had before my husband started calling him dad when the bonus babies did,their bio dad doesn’t have anything to do with them, it’s been 8 years and they are happy so we are happy.
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My daughter calls my boyfriend dad or papi
If they wanted to call his girlfriend mom I’d be okay with it.
I only see a problem if the kid DOESN’T WANT TO call them that. If that’s the case he just needs to let the child know it’s okay to call him a different respectful name and speak with the ex and explain that it’s not healthy to FORCE the child to call the step parent daddy.
That’s her Daddy too and you two are just harming your child more by not allowing her to call him Daddy at yours like grow the F up poor kid!
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If he’s a positive role model then she can have 2 daddies. Be a team for the KIDS maybe look into co-parenting classes for all
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This should be left up to the child. My son has a step mother and step father. He’s chosen to call both by their names. Personally, I’d be grateful if he thought enough of his step mom to call her mom… Not petty. Soooo many kids aren’t lucky enough to be loved by anyone and you’re mad that this child is loved by two sets of parents!!! I call my step-dad dad and have by my choice since I was pretty young. It has ZERO reflection on my biological father and his place in my life. This sounds like high school jealousy 
Also should you allow it? You don’t allow anything… It’s not your child. What in the world makes you think either of you have the right to dictate what happens in another household to begin with. Maybe check your entitlement to this child and her feelings at the door and put her first.
It shouldn’t honestly be up to either of you. But the mom shouldn’t be forcing it either - it should be the daughter’s choice unless the bf is uncomfortable with it
This poor child. Probably so confused. Sounds like you all need to grow up.
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Let the kid call him what she wants. Adults cause these situations with kids then get hurt because they choose to call another mom or dad. If she wants to call him dad she should be allowed if she does not then she shouldn’t be made to. Adult situations are hard for kids to understand and if she chooses to call him dad then be grateful there is another father figure in her life
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You all got way to much time on ya hands
First off the mother is wrong for forcing her daughter to call her boyfriend dad, that’s so wrong. If the child feels comfortable calling him dad then that’s fine but for it to be forced is so wrong!!! I’d be upset if I was the father as well. My step daughter who’s 10 Calls me mom because she wants to not because I make her.
You can have your fiancé have a talk with her and ask her does she feel comfortable calling him dad? Does he treat you good? See what she says.
Poor kid I hope she doesn’t have mental problem from her mother😞
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I think it should come naturally to a child and how they feel about that person. I don’t think they should be told to call a person by a certain title.
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If he’s been there since she was a baby and she is now 6, then what’s the problem with her calling him daddy? He’s been a father figure her entire life. I understand your partner’s feelings are hurt, but this isn’t about yours or his feelings. It’s about the child’s.
“She’s not allowed to call him daddy with us” You both sound very selfish. That child is BLESSED to have 2 fathers in her life. Not to mention, ya’ll only get her twice a week and you’re not even her bio mom so who the hell are you to say what she can and can’t call someone? I’m sure you wouldn’t have a problem with her calling you mom. If she wants to call him daddy and it makes her happy, don’t take that happiness away.
Grow up and stop being selfish because of your insecurities.
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But if she called u mummy ot would be a different story?? There’s no such thing as the nuclear family these days… we all have step parents, in laws, she’s only 6… as long as the child is loved and cared for in both houses why does it matter who gets called what? He’s her bio dad at the end of the day, and calling another man daddy won’t change that!!
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I don’t think YOU have a say in it at all, if the dad has a problem with it then he’s the one who has to speak up, although it’s going to be difficult to control what happens in a house he doesn’t live in
This is about ego, men can share the title. It will be okay. She lives with him, he’s parenting her. Explore why this hurts and work on that as it’s personal and not about this other man. The confidence of fathering well enough is not about a name.
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I’m not going to bash you.
However, my 4 year old calls his “stepdad” (my two older boys dad) dad & daddy. But he calls his real dad the same shit.
My two older boys dad helped raise him since he was a fresh out of the womb. His real dad didn’t get involved until he was a month old.
If he’s a good stand up guy and he’s been around all that time and treats her well then swallow your feelings and be thankful she has a “daddy” at both houses. It’s not about you it’s about her. Be thankful and consider yourselves blessed as she seems to have 4 parents that love her when many kids don’t have even 1.
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keep your nose out of it… if hes been there since day 1 & sees him as a dad figure thats between them…
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It’s not about you or your finances feelings, that’s adult issues. It’s about how the child feels. Sounds like she has 2 dads and he has raised her her whole life just like you guys… My children have had their bonus dad in their life 6 years and call him daddy when they want 
.
*I’d like to add, if possible you guys should look into co parenting instead treating it like your on teams. That baby has more than enough love for all 4 of you! and in turn you guys can all work together for her life to be the best it can
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I think it’s perfectly acceptable for her to be calling him daddy, as like you have said he’s been there since she was a baby, and she’s obviously comfortable around him to be calling him daddy. I think you guys are being a bit jealous no offence, be grateful that this little girl has these people to love and support her through life, I know people in this situation who happily refer to having 2 mums and 2 dads it’s a bonus if anything 
hopefully you manage to sort it out for the sake of your little girl, she doesn’t deserve to be stuck between bitter parents
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Whatever the child thinks is appropriate
I get it I think that if it really bothers him he could say something but I wouldn’t be nasty about it
I think it’s easy to talk about the co parenting but to actually do it is really challenging and for so many of you to tell her to grow up to leave a be she’s got two daddies blah blah blah blah some of you mom’s on here would not be okay if you didn’t have custody of your child but you still participated on the weekends paid your child support or what not and your child called another woman mom I guarantee you some of you would not be okay with it so let’s not be so judgy when we’re talking to this mom about her bonus child does her bonus child call her mom would that Mom still appreciate that?
I have 2 baby daddies, my son started calling his “step dad” daddy when he could talk, then my youngest child started calling the other kids dad, daddy. And it’s just always been what it is. Both of the dads are completely fine with it. The kids are happy and that’s all that matters. Even though we get some crazy looks when we are all together doing stuff with our kiddos 
but as long as that baby is loved and happy, there is absolutely nothing wrong with it in the end.
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If she calls him Daddy he’s been doing the job, it’s her choice.
Don’t tell her she can’t.
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I don’t think it should be forced. She should be making that choice. She is definitely old enough. Don’t put her in the middle!
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I understand your fiance’s hurt over this, but please, you guys need to be the grown ups! Don’t even worry about it. This kid is going to be so torn all the way around! I don’t agree with anyone forcing a child to call someone Daddy, but you can’t control what his ex does. Be this little girls peace in life. If the guy is a good guy to her and has been around since she was a baby, I’m sure he’s doing lots of “Daddy” stuff. Leave it alone.
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People will do what they will do. You can talk to them but they may not listen.
As for the child, don’t put that on them, dont drag them in to the adult dispute. Her relationship with her actual father isn’t measured by what she calls her step parent.
Should not be forced unless that is what the child wants
so many of y’all are saying that she’s not her mom and doesn’t have a say so but her mother is making her call the boyfriend dad and that she has two dads… ???
if she’s not the daughters “mom” then the boyfriend is not the daughters “dad”???
I say that at 6 years old, she should have a say so in what she wants to call him and you both. if mom would have a problem with the daughter calling you mom then that’s where the issues lay.
i would be absolutely heartbroken if my daughter called someone else mom and i know her dad would be heartbroken if she was calling someone else dad. but ultimately, it should be the child’s choice.
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I mean after six years (since birth) he’s daddy he’s the constant, every day man in the child’s life. I doubt the mom is “forcing” it. Y’all are butthurt and blaming mom. Well, he’s dad. Sorry, not sorry.
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You shouldn’t tell her she isn’t allowed to call him daddy if that’s what she feels comfortable with. If he’s been there since she was a baby and now she’s 6, he has earned the title and unfortunately it seems your husband is quite jealous. Don’t make her feel like she’s doing something wrong.
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If there since a baby I’d assume he parents aswell so is parenting role. Though maybe hurtful to your fiance. I wouldn’t tell a 6yr old she can’t call him daddy when at yours though you may push her away as gets older. Other person is playing the dad role all week and has since a baby so she does have 2 daddies really. It’s all she’s known
I read this very wrong 
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I think the child should decide what she wants to call him but when she’s with you call him daddy first name.
You doing too much. Mind your house!
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He should probably seek some counseling. This is what blended family looks like. Two moms and two dads.
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Part of blending families is knowing boundaries. Accept that, or move on.
It’s up to the child.
That man seems to have more of a step up parent roll established than you have
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I’m sorry but you guys only see her 2 times a week. You aren’t even her full time parents so who the hell are you to tell the person who takes care of her all the time that that she can’t call him that. You are a step mom, you are not her mother. You definitely need to learn how to stay in your lane.
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Go to court. You can have it written in court agreements that only the biological parents can be called Mum/Dad and partners are only to be called by first name.
However, if it’s something your daughter is doing without being forced I would leave it alone as she knows who her parents are and she is just expressing her trust and love in her own way.
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My bonus daughter (4) came to me telling me her momma had told her to call her bonus dad daddy. My husband and I told her if that’s what she wants to call him then she can. We let them choose what they want to call us. Just bc we’re the “step” parents it doesn’t make any difference. To the kids we’re just as much their parents as their real mommy and daddy. We give her the choice. If she wants to call him daddy and me momma that’s her choice. But she’s decided to call us by our names and that’s okay too.
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Just keep telling the daughter she is allowed to call him what ever she wants … doesn’t matter what the names are he will always and forever be her father
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You could maybe mind your business? That’s their household, not yours.
Not your business tbh. I don’t agree with forcing it but again, not your place to say anything.
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Why would you be upset that she has a bonus dad? Grow up
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If he has been there six years everyday he has earned the right to be called dad I feel if the child wants to call him that of course
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I don’t think a child should be forced to call a step parent anything… if the child calls that parent “mom/dad” on their own then so be it but to force them is another story.
I don’t agree with it but I don’t know if there’s really much you can do about it.
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It’s because she doesn’t call you mommy isn’t it.
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How confusing for that poor kid
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If the daughter wants to, let her,
Well that didn’t go the way you wanted it to did it 
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A kid chooses when to call a step parent mommy, daddy, and so on or what they wanna call them…
He has been in her life for 6 years! He has earned it!!! Now you not letting her use the term in your house is wrong! She should be able to call whomever whatever!
He isn’t some random off the street that her mums been with for 5 mins. He’s a bonus dad and I truly believe if he’s raising her and loves her why shouldn’t she? She obviously knows who her bio dad is, if that’s what she wants to call him then leave it be.
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So this child won’t ever be allowed to call you mom just because you’re a step parent ???
I feel like there is pettiness all around with this one. There should not be a rule at their house that she has to call him daddy but there also should not be a rule at your house that she cannot refer to him as that! All of you need to stop pushing your idea/feelings on her. It should be her choice what she wants and feels comfortable calling him and you as well. If she sees him as a dad she should be able to call him that, if she isnt comfortable then she shouldnt but none of you should be making rules for this poor baby.
With all this being said do they have another kid too? Could that be the reason for change? I know when my son was born I sat my daughter down and explained that “daddy Andrew” would be this baby’s only dad and we would refer to him as daddy when taking to the baby but she could still call him “Andrew” or “Daddy Andrew” she looked me dead in the eyes and said why cant I just call him daddy too? And I told her she could if she was comfortable with that. She was just over 3.5 when her brother was born. Its been dad/daddy ever since 
Her dad and gf tried to force her to call the gf mom at their house while simultaneously making her feel bad about calling him dad (he’d been in the picture since right before she turned 2). Long story short she resented them for both trying to force a title she didnt feel and for discrediting one she did feel. She is almost 11 and they are no longer in her life and she is thriving, she has no regrets and is healthier without the manipulation. Both parties need to let that baby decide what feels right to her and stop forcing adult ideals and conflict on her.
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that ain’t your battle.
that’s a conversation your fiancé needs to have with his daughter & daughter’s mom.
however, she shouldn’t be forced to call anybody anything. but it sounds like you wanna be mommy on your weekends 
Took me 30 years before I was comfortable enough to call my stepfather, dad.
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There’s isn’t a “we” it’s her dads fight if he wants to fight it. However, if the boyfriend has been in her life since she was a baby and is raising her then why shouldn’t she call him dad. Awfully toxic of you to try and dictate a house you have zero control over.
You can’t dictate the other household, as it’s someone else’s child too. But odd you’re against it he’s been apart of her life since she was a baby. Get over it. He’s a father figure, she can call him whatever she wants.
I think the child is 6. If they wanna have two dads bc they’ve both been in their life. Let them.
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In my court ordered paperwork it states my child isn’t allowed to call someone else mom or dad.
Don’t put limitations on what she calls people. He is her daddy too, especially if he’s been in her life since she was a baby. He’s in her home and helps raise her too. Her father is allowed to have feelings about it, but co-parenting means accepting certain things and compromises. This is likely one of many things he will just have to accept.
I wouldn’t be okay with it because you said she isn’t ALLOWED to call him by his name. They aren’t even married, to technically he isn’t even her stepdad. But all of this is besides the point, SHE should be able to call him what she’s comfortable calling him, be it his name or dad. I had a stepdad from age 2 to my late 20s and I never called him anything but his name. It was never a problem for anyone.
This is petty. My husbands ex wife did this when their daughter decided I was mama. My daughter calls my husband daddy and he’s been in her life for 10 years. But you can’t dictate what happens in their house. How does she feel about it?
I think it’s wrong for then to force her to call him daddy. But it is also wrong for you and her father to tell her she can’t call him that at your house. You are forcing her to be two differ t people and teaching her that she has to adapt to feel safe with her parents. That’s wrong.
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Since she gets time with her daddy it should be something the girl wants to do and come up with a name other than dad or daddy. Child’s mom is confusing the poor child.
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Just why can’t people just get over themselves and instead of having issues with the names the children use for a parent be happy they have 4 parents who care about the well being of said child
Quit with the power trip if said child has a caring family and less tension isn’t the ultimate goal to raise the child to see more than just what you want them to see
Help them to adulthood
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I feel bad for the kid in this one. Y’all need to grow up
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Something you guys are going to have to get over. The little girl is blessed to have two dads. Sounds like the adults need to grow up
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I don’t go for that but that’s me. You have 1 dad and 1 mom. The others are step and to call them by there name. Do not disrespect your father or me calling someone else mom or dad when they did not carry you for 9 months Or play any part making you.
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She should address the mothers boyfriend , and you what SHE is comfortable with.
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Are they forcing her or does she want to?
I’m sure it’s not easy but come on. Grow up,
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She should be free to call him whatever she wants at both homes… he’s been there since she was a baby. He’s a bonus dad. And yeah it may hurt your boyfriends feelings because he is biologically her father, it’s not about his feelings it’s about the childs…
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When I first read this …man I read this so wrong lol