You cannot control what that woman allows in HER house. She’s 6, she’s not dumb. She knows who her father is and her step father has been in her life long enough for them to have that type of relationship. It’s not that serious. She should be able to call him whatever she wants without two adults getting butt hurt about it. As long as she’s not disrespecting her real dad, I don’t see the problem.
May I ask have you asked his daughter what she wants? He has helped raise her since she was a baby so I don’t understand how this can be an issue?
I have been with my partner from being pregnant he’s not my son’s biological father but my son who is 4 as always called him dad since he was 3 he came out with it and didn’t want to stop him…. He still sees his real dad and knows and understands that he has 2 dads… I know your partner may be hurting in this situation but think about it if his daughter asked if she could call you mum would you allow it or turn around and say no don’t call me that?
Think about his daughter she probable asked for permission to call him dad she’s 6 and old enough to understand.xx
1 Like
It depends on if the child WANTS to call her bonus father “dad” my daughter decided at 4 that my fiance was her other dad, she called him “daddy first name” eventually it just ended up “dad” he’s been in her life more than her bio father. When her bio was in her life he just had to get over it and learn that she loved them both
Leave her decide, she’s lucky enough to have a extra person to love her
I’ve been in my step daughters lives for 7 yrs at first there bio mom was not around she just recently got involved in their lives, they’ve called me mom since a few mnths into me & their fathers relationship, we always told them they could call me wht they wanted it wouldn’t offend me either way and they choose mom. Now tht bio moms around they have 2 moms. Kids can make their own choices based on how they feel!
1 Like
This is a convo for the dad to have with the mom. I see where you are coming from but its not your battle to fight, its his. I have a stepmom whom has been in my life for almost 25 years I have never once called her mom because I have a mom. I call her by her name and when I speak of her to others I call her my step mom. But with that being said my father married his second wife when I was around 3 or 4 years old and I started calling her mom and she and my father both asked my mother if that was ok, its a respect thing. My mother had no problem with it but I feel the mother in this situation should at least have enough respect for the bio dad to have a conversation at least before this continues.
1 Like
Literally not your choice to make. It would be a cold day in hell before my exs woman told me what I was allowed to do as a mom. You literally have ZERO rights to say anything.
2 Likes
Im in the same situation but a little different to. My baby daddy has never been around. For 7 years my boys thought my husband was there dad because their dad walked out and never came back. Didn’t help financially or nothing for 7 years. I let them choose what they called my husband and of course it was daddy. Last year June 28 2021 I had made many many bad decisions and got them removed from me and my baby daddy got them. His live in girlfriend/other baby mama makes my boys call her mom as well no other options were given so when they come here I correct them on her name. When they say mom I just say you mean hope. And they are like yeah. But these people have only been around my children for barely a year and the minute they moved in that’s what they told them to call them. I feel some type of way about it because you aren’t dad and she isn’t mom. A mom and dad is much more than stepping in when the kids are 8 & 7 and saying oh yeah here I am. No. I feel you girl. I don’t have any opinions or advice on the matter just wanted you to know your not alone
Wow!!!.. You all need to grow up for the sake of that child 
3 Likes
Let the daughter decide. When I was around the same age as a child, I called my step dad, Dad, in front of my father and he lost his mind. My step has been there for me my entire life. It broke my heart that just one word caused so much grief for one and happiness for another. A child shouldn’t have to go through that confusion.
5 Likes
my advice is for YOU to saty out of it. this should stay between the dad and mom to discuss.
Ask the daughter if she feels comfortable calling him daddy
1 Like
I mean if she’s 6 and they have been together since she was a baby then I don’t see an issue with him being her dad too. And you be her mommy too though…
You can’t control things when it’s not your house. You only have the kid on weekends and she spends majority of her time with her bio mom and step dad so you don’t have any say in what goes on when you’re not there.
Now idk if it’s superficially the “daddy” that’s bothering you. Or just her calling him dad in general… but just educate your kid the best way possible. Having more than 2 parents can be a blessings.
Now if you feel like it’s an issue for your daugthers safety then I would take it to court and try to fight to get your daughter more than just weekends. But you really have no say so… regardless how you feel.
Of course it’s okay if she wants to but they shouldn’t make her. My daughter was 5 when I met my husband. She calls him Daddy! I always called him Daddy around her as if it was his name. It would be weird when they have more children her calling him by his name around her siblings. That was my reason
Excuse me, YOU have no saying in this!
Should “””WE “””””tell her we are not allowing it??? No! This is his problem with the mother of the child. You stay out of it.
2 Likes
My daughter calls her dads so mom 
if they are a constant part of that child’s life and a good bonus parent I don’t think that it should be a problem
There isn’t anything u can do. I mean you can tell them whatever you want, doesn’t mean they have to listen. Is it rude of them? Yeah kinda. Is it hurtful ?yea. Is it your choice? Unfortunately not. All these it should stay between mkm and dad comments are also bs. Bio moms want stepmoms to do all things mom but not have mom opinions. It’s a bonus mom/dad. If they are forcing kiddo to call bf dad and she doesn’t want to then u say something. If they are telling her not to call bio dad dad then u say something. Otherwise what they do in their house is absolutely none of your business.
If that’s what she wants it’s not your business what they do at their place just like it’s not their business what you do at yours
That man has been around from the beginning and you’re mad she calls him dad? Do you even know if she started it on her own? You’re assuming they are forcing her, but that may not be the case. I have a 9 year old who met her daddy when she was 2. We didn’t force the issue she chose it. When she was 4.
The child should be able to call the adults in her life whatever she chooses. She’s had him as a dad for her whole life so why wouldn’t she call him dad also. Many have stepparents. You however are the fiance so you don’t get any say in this at all. You don’t get to say what you think should be allowed or not or demand what you believe should be allowed or not as you are simply a fiance. You are stepping over the line in your role.
1 Like
I would let the mother and father of the child figure it out and stay out of it as it’s not your place to say anything. I think it should be the child that decides what she want’s to call her “bonus dad”
1 Like
I think your fiance needs to grow up. If he’s hurt because she’s calling the person who has taken the role of a dad for 6 years Daddy, then he needs to reevaluate himself this is very immature. You need to Center the child. It’s what’s best for the child not what doesn’t hurt the parents’ feelings the most
I don’t think she should be forced to call him daddy I think that if she chose to then it would be okay and when she was with you I would just constantly remind her. Who her actual real daddy is make sure that she knows that she is lucky that she has two dads who love her very much, but to make her call him daddy I don’t think that’s okay.
My situation however is a little different my kids don’t have their dad around I do have a boyfriend that I’ve been seeing for a couple years now should they choose to call him dad or daddy or whatever then that is on their own terms if they choose to call him by his name like they always have that is OK to. I feel like it should be all about making sure the kid is comfortable also making sure she knows who her real dad is
If the child chooses to call him Dad then I’d be ok with it. If they are forcing her to call him Dad then no, it’s not ok.
1 Like
Wow , the man ben in her life sents day1 he is her other dad ur the other mom
A child aloud to call 2 person mom or dad
Woman on here need grow up a child can have 2 mom
And same for man need grow up and acept a child can have 2 dad
2 Likes
My question is…what does she call you? What does she call her actual dad? Sounds like a conversation for all four of you guys too have. Civilly of course.
I wouldn’t allow it that’s for sure .
I left my ex and my kids weren’t allowed to call any other guy daddy I wouldn’t allow it . But when they turned a certain age they started doing it on there own and the guy I’m with now been with 15 years my youngest being 29 oldest being 35 youngest says this guy is his dad and his dad is just a sperm donor he don’t see or have anything to do with his dad hasn’t in like 20 years . 
It’s bitter and weird if it’s only been a short amount of time but You can’t really do anything… I hate people that do this crap early but since it’s been 6 years I mean…Kids should call them what THEY want when they feel comfortable doing so. Not what the other parent wants them to call them.
3 Likes
I make my wife call me daddy. No big deal
3 Likes
As a mother I know that stings but in the end you have no say so long as the child is happy
This sounds like an embellished story because you’re salty that she calls her step dad, daddy but doesn’t call you mommy. Fun fact. You are a step parent. Stay in your lane. You don’t get to tell mama what she can and can’t do…you don’t even get to tell dad what he can and can’t do. You have no say.
1 Like
Pick your battles in life. This isn’t one of them. Let it go
2 Likes
You are the step mom. At some point she may want to call you mom also. When children reach school age it makes it easier on them then having to explain the details over and over. Maybe yall can learn healthy co-parenting. And be ok with the fact she has two moms and dads. It takes a village and the more love and support she has the better she will thrive.
2 Likes
Now would all the women who say it is okay to call her step dad daddy would you be okay if your baby daddy got with someone else and your child started calling the step mom mommy would you be okay with it. It gives you something to think about.
If she is being forced to do so then her DAD needs to address it. If she decided to do so on her own DAD needs to accept it. Please notice DAD is capitalized, meaning this has nothing to do with you.
2 Likes
That man spends more time with that child then your fiancé. He is her Dad too. Leave it alone and let her call him whatever she wants. My step daughter started calling me Mommy when she was 4, on her own accord, I know it hurt her moms feelings, but the mental abuse her mom puts her through because she wants to call me Mommy is next level. My stepdaughter could call me by my name but she doesn’t want too, and no one should be making her feel bad about it.
I personally don’t think it’s fair when parents who have their child four nights a month, get to dictate anything. Your fiancé should never have accepted every other weekend. He should have fought for 50/50. Whatever the reason he doesn’t have his daughter more, that is his fault and he needs to remedy it or accept that he is not the main father figure in his child’s life.
4 Likes
So he has been in her life since she was a baby so yeah what’s the issue she can have two daddy’s I don’t see the problem
2 Likes
You should not MAKE your child call anybody anything. Calling her boyfriend daddy should be the daughters choice not her mom forcing it. She is basically telling her that she doesn’t care how her daughter feels about it and that is not ok. You tell your daughter that she can call her moms boyfriend whatever she feels comfortable with it’s her choice. She should not be forced to call him daddy if she doesn’t want to.
1 Like
If she wants to call him that she can. I call my mom’s, mom and my dad’s, dad. He’d been seeing since the very beginning
Umm it’s not your choice I hate to say it y’all sound controlling
She can call him whatever she wants 
my kids call my husband dad or his name. It was always their choice.
1 Like
How about “daddy Joe” and “mama Carol”? I worked well for my daughter. I myself called my stepdad by his name until I left home, and then I called him Daddy. I really think it should be up to the child.
Is it possible she is willingly calling him daddy but then she’s saying different bc her bio father is acting butthurt? He lives with her a majority of the time doing fatherly stuff for her entire life. It’s pretty normal for her to see him as her dad too. This is something you should stay out of… dad needs to figure out his emotions on his own. If he’s really struggling then he needs to work with them with a therapist.
none of your business
2 Likes
Bring her to court. Because she’s not allowed to do that
4 Likes
Ask the child if she wants to call him that and if she understands that her father is her actual dad and not this other fellow. If she understands the difference an is ok with calling both daddy then leave it alone bc she knows who her actual dad is but they’re both her fathers. The boyfriend has been there since she was a baby so he has established consistency with her and probably does fatherly things with her and for her. I think he’s earned his badge to be a bonus dad to her. I think you’re looking at this as if she were yours and calling someone else mommy when in fact you do not have that right to feel as such an you’re assuming your fiancé is deeply affected by it when he probably isn’t as affected by it as you’re portraying. Just have the conversation with her and you stay out of it bc I feel as though you may not have been in the picture quite as long as this bonus dad has to be getting involved like this and are probably creating insecurities in your fiancé that he never had before. Also maybe he needs to take more initiative in his daughters life to be more present than just his weekends.
This is a one sided story with a lot of holes…it’s none of your business, he needs to deal with it with his ex…where was your fiance when she was a baby, has he been in her life from birth. Have you been to court to establish child support and custody…
…
3 Likes
If would talk to mom and ask her if there is something else she could call him like pops or something. However there is nothing wrong with a child having two dads. Daughter is 6 im sure she knows he is not her bio dad so i dont see a problem with it. They have been together for 6 yrs i do think it is ok.
Her dad should talk with her and explain that he’s her daddy…talk with the other woman tell her how hurtful it is
As long as she knows when she is with yous that she is to call him by his name than just let it be what it is
1 Like
This is a subject I could go on and on about and have personal experience with. But I’ll keep it short and sweet.
If this man is a father figure and loves her and treats her as his, if the little girl has that kind of connection to want to call that man “dad”,then let her. I don’t see a problem with it. This man isn’t a replacement. It isn’t disrespectful, It’s a bonus! This shouldn’t be about adults being jealous or territorial. This is about what makes that baby feel happy and loved. Don’t look at this as a threat. Look at this as a child that has parents that are keeping her best interest at heart and the more love that child gets from everyone, the better life she will have!
5 Likes
You don’t get to decide that
4 Likes
My daughter tells everyone she has 2 dad’s and 2 mom’s me and her dad are cool with it she calls me mommy and my bf daddy she calls him dad and his gf mom with blue hair. If she’s being forced that’s different but some kids do that on their own there is nothing wrong with it as long as she knows the difference.
1 Like
You sit back and respect that your daughter feels a connection with another person that is worthy of the title in her eyes and you DO NOT tell her she can’t call him that. You appreciate this man and the effort he puts into parenting her and you respect the fact that he’s more of a full time parent than your fiancé even is.
9 Likes
Absolutely not . Unless she wants to then NO .
My husbands Daughter at the age of 4 told us mommy told her to call her boyfriend of only 3 months at the time daddy so she does, it hurts him but it’s their house nothing you can do.
My Granddaughter called my son, her step Dad, Dad. Her Dad had o issue with it. She would though when talking about her bio Dad or my son say their names after using the word Dad. It made it so we knew who she was talking about. No one in the family had a problem with it. I grew up with a step Dad. All of us kids called him Dad. Only Dad we had growing up.
Mines call my husband daddy and they’re not his, he’s been there for them since they were little, you cannot decide that, if the little girl feels like calling him daddy then I don’t see a problem, he’s there for her and he’s taking the daddy roll so I don’t see a problem
1 Like
There should be no pressure from either side on what she calls him, she should be able to call him what she feels comfortable with whether that be his name, daddy or another nickname she has. Creating unnecessary trauma by making this small child have to change around adults consistently for their own feelings not hers.
3 Likes
She shouldn’t be forced to call him anything she doesn’t want to but also there’s not much you can do outside of reassuring her of who her father is and that you love her. And you should NOT punish her for what she chooses to call him if it’s her own choice.
My now husband called my eldest his son before we were even married. If they’re getting angry/forcing it of her then it’s no good but if it’s what she wants to call him… why is it an issue? He acts as a dad for her, and who says we can only have 1 mom and 1 dad? .-.
Now, you telling this young kiddo who GREW UP WITH HIM AS A FATHER FIGURE that she can’t call him that at your place? THAT is horrible and painful to her.
Get over yourselves.
Find your lane please
3 Likes
There’s nothing wrong with her having 2 daddy’s is the child uncomfortable with it? If not then let it be.
3 Likes
I think telling her she can’t say it is a little extreme, I would give her the option if she want to let her if she doesn’t want to then she doesn’t have to. But telling her she can’t is just as wrong as her mom making her call him dad. My step daughter calls me Dan but refers to me as her dad to everyone else
3 Likes
If the daughter wants to call him daddy, let her
1 Like
Well honestly, for one… It isn’t what should WE do… Because this isn’t you, nor up to you or your place. But the father’s. And, the boyfriend has been there since she was a baby… So honestly… There’s a HUGE possibility… That she started doing it on her own, because she sees him as a father figure. She’s with him 5 days a week. For the last 6 years of her entire life. And he’s been involved in helping raise her. And, they just aren’t not allowing it. Or forcing her to stop. And, you guys are seeing it as the mother forcing her to do so, and not allowing her to call him by his name. When really, it could’ve been her choice all along. But, if your fiance has any feelings towards it, HE needs to have a conversation on his own with the mother of his child. Because no matter what, that is between them. Not you. And isn’t a “we” situation. That family came before you, and always has. Yes, done decisions and situations, will be a “we” situation. But, not all. Some or most… Will be a “him” or a “them” situation. And better if you stay out of it. Or you can make it worse
6 Likes
My mom and stepdad forced me and my brothers call him dad. I resented them both for that. I never ever liked him because of it, no matter what he did. He left for hopefully Heaven many years ago. I was an adult and only went to the funeral out of respect.
1 Like
When she’s at her mom’s house you have no say. The only thing is if they tell her she can’t call her real father dad. That would be parental alienation and is a big no no
1 Like
Who says the mom MAKES her? Maybe the little girl decided that SHE wants to call him daddy. Just like one day SHE might decide that she wants to call you mom. I’m sure that you or your fiancé wouldn’t have a problem with that. “Should we straight up tell them no we’re not allowing it?” Girl you are funny as hell. 
So YOU should get some say but the man that’s been there helping with the little girl EVERYDAY shouldn’t? Go ahead and try to tell that woman what you are NOT going to allow with HER CHILD and let me know how that turns out. 
4 Likes
If it’s forced then something needs to be said, if she’s choosing to call him that then it’s not your right to stop that. My kiddos chose to call my husband dad, my step-daughter calls my ally.
2 Likes
I mean you have no weight in the matter.
3 Likes
He’s been around since she was pretty much born and she’s 6 now? He is a father figure and if you only have weekends I’m sorry but he’s the main father figure in her life, she most definitely can call him daddy if she wants to! Now if they were making her and she didn’t want to, that’d be a different story but I really think it matters what the kid wants/is comfortable with not you.
6 Likes
As an adult that had 2 dads as a kid-it was my choice but if asked about it I wouldn’t have wanted to say that to bio dad if I thought it would hurt him. No one made me call my step dad “dad” it was natural and a lot easier when he was around daily and when I had friends over. His daughter knows who her dad’s are and how that all plays out, it feels personal but it’s really not. The absolute best thing you can do is leave it alone and not put your daughter in the middle of an awkward fight over something that doesn’t mean spit. Someday she may call you mom as well. When kids are young it feels awkward to have to explain dynamics to others.
1 Like
I call my step dad dad, because that’s what he is to me. It doesn’t make me love my dad any less. I just love them both. You can’t decide what she calls her step dad. Chances are, her mom isn’t making her do anything. She probably chose to call him dad & that’s ok
5 Likes
This is why I dislike the double standards with men and women. If he’s been with mom long enough why not? Maybe daddy is a bit much in my book but she’s 6. If we ok a step mom being called “mom”, “Mama” and “Mommy” for being another mother figure to the children then why can’t step dad’s?
If he’s raising that child full of love and like his own child then what’s the problem ? If she’s the one who decided to use that term then obviously he’s doing something right. We need to appreciate the other parents partner for loving children that are not there’s in my opinion because now that child get double love from both sides. If he was a bad person I’d understand but nothing here makes him out in bad light.
We have to work together for these kids!
1 Like
She should call him whatever SHE wants to call him, what she calls him should be no one else’s choice but HER OWN
3 Likes
Its always awesome when people break up BUT enter new relationships that are healthy and respectful and children end up with bonus parents who love them! It can be hard on our egos… we are only human. But think of how great it is that your child is being raised with so many people on their team.
2 Likes
Have your fiancee double check his custody agreement, in some states this is addressed specifically. And while it may not say in the agreement , it may refer to another document (like “code of conduct” “shared custody behavior”, I can’t remember exactly what Alabama calls theirs). If it is addressed and she is in the wrong, she is in contempt of court.
2 Likes
Ask her what she feels comfortable with. Also, if they don’t want her to call him by name see if her and step-dad can come up with a unique name she can call him.
It could be her choice. If she lives with them most of the time be thankful he is being someone she would want to call Daddy!
I think you should ask her what she wants to call him and let her do what makes her most comfortable. I grew up with a step dad and a bio dad. And I called them both dad sometimes! And sometimes I called him by his name. It was up to preference and feeling that day. Look at it this way, more love for the kid, and as long as you are doing your very best to let them know how loved they are then who cares what they call who. She knows you’re the one who made her 
2 Likes
Its not up to any of you. It’s up to her.
4 Likes
Why is it so wrong? He’s been around since she was a baby. He is a father figure in her life. I find that you are being a bit over reactive. Honestly I don’t understand why you would be so against it. So against someone loving her and if she feels enough love and safety with him to consider him a dad I would be being thankful for that man. You’re husband may be hurt but Insted of looking at it as “wrong” try looking at it as “wow, she feels enough love from this man to consider him a dad in her life.” Y’all need to chill.
2 Likes
I think it should be up to the daughter if she want to. I gave two step kids and they do not call me mom which I am fine with that. But my daughter calls my husband daddy he has been in her life since she class two and she going to he 7 she just started calling him dad on her own.
The child is old enough to decide!
Just curious as to what she calls you? If stepdad has been around since she was a baby, then he is her dad. Why shouldn’t she be allowed to call him dad. Does she call bio dad dad also. Well good she has two daddy figures that love and care about her. That’s awesome. If she doesn’t call you mom would there be an issue if she started?? I agree with other comments this is not a WE situation this is a situation for the bio parents. I’m a step mom (last 10 yrs) I don’t tell my stepkids to call me mom (and they are my kids regardless if they do or don’t), but if they chose to then I wouldn’t mind. My kids do however call my husband dad. Their choice and we support it. He’s been their dad since they were 6 yrs and 2 mos old.
2 Likes
Honestly, it should be 110% up to your boyfriends daughter. If bio moms boyfriend is okay with it, and your step daughter is okay with it. Then that should be the end of the conversation.
1 Like
When you have a child with someone and tha. They split. You have to understand that one day they are gona find someone else and that someone is going to become a parental figure. Eventually that child is gona wanna call them dad or mom. I hope that one day my ex find someone that my daughter will get close enough to be called a bonus mom… my daughter calls my husband “papá” and has for years. He’s been around since she is 2, she’s 11 now. She thinks it’s the most amazing thing to have 2 dads. I think it’s time to quit being bitter about it and embrace it. I mean the dude has been around since birth.
1 Like
Step dad spends more time with the child(all week).going to have to accept this.
2 Likes
It should always be the child’s choice on what they feel is comfortable. For instance, my husband has been around since my son was a baby as well and he has called him dad from the time he could say it. We tried to correct him for the first couple of years but it didn’t work. We were ok with it but his bio dad was having huge hissy fits. It doesn’t really bother me . Ive always told him that he can call his step mom …mom if he wants. I know my place in his heart.
I don’t get why people get their panties in a bunch over this. If it looks like a dad/mom , acts like a dad/ mom then it is a dad/ mom.
2 Likes
You’re both being selfish… She’s been living with him basically all fo her life minus 6 months… I doubt that they’re ‘forcing’ her to call him daddy. He is her step father, just like you’ll be her step mother… Works both ways… Stop using the kid as an excuse to pick fights with the ex and her partner at her expense.
6 Likes
For one stay in your lane . If he is a great stepdad that takes care of this child full time which it sounds like he does , than YES . If SHE WANTS to call him dad that is her choice . If she doesn’t than bio dad needs to talk to her about healthy boundaries and what they mean
4 Likes
Sounds like you guys need to evaluate yourselves
I had a step-dad and called him dad til he passed away. It didn’t take away from the fact i had a biological father one single bit.
If hes been around since she was a baby and she’s 6 now, that’s her entire life. He IS her dad in a sense. Kids don’t need to just have a dad and dad’s girlfriend or a mom and mom’s boyfriend. If she WANTS to call him Dad, YOU are in the wrong for telling her she literally isn’t allowed to.
3 Likes
Kids often have one name for bio dad, like daddy and a different name like pops for step dad.
You don’t have a choice to allow it or not seems the mom has the custody and of his daughter is 6 I’m sure she can voice what she wants and what she feels comfortable with ultimately yeah it sucks but if it’s what his daughter wants then it’s what she wants she can have 2 daddy’s and still love them both
2 Likes
If he’s the man raising her every day, he’s her daddy in her eyes. I’m sure she knows your fiancé is also her dad, but her daddy is the one there every day, the one she can count on.
3 Likes
I think it should be up the the kid what she wants to call him. The kid should have an understanding of who each person is to them and where they stand in a family tree kind of way( how they fit in the house and everything) and then she should have the option to call them by name or whatever title is appropriate. I don’t think a kid should be forced to call anyone daddy especially if they don’t understand or aren’t ready.
1 Like
My daughter called her dad’s girlfriend Miss Trish even after she became her step mom. We all called her that too! My daughter called my husband Stan because it worked for her/us.
I don’t get how she’s forced to call him daddy at their house, but she’s not allowed to at your house? That implies that she wants to call him daddy, but you won’t let her. Either way, it should be the child’s choice. He raises and takes care of her for 5 days a week. If she wants to call him daddy, let her.
2 Likes
He is not a step dad unless they are married
2 Likes