Some folks kill me. It is not her business to know who is around their kid. 
7 Likes
go there when he isnt around if she is around ur child u have the right4
She has the right to meet whoās around her child or the child should not period
3 Likes
Unless itās in the court documents she has 0 right to know anything about any person he has around the child. Sheās not with him anymore and has to give up control
1 Like
Sheās allowed to knowā¦ The court could fix this
2 Likes
Sounds like she need to go get it a custody agreement in court and that needs to be a stipulations that they have to meet each otherās significant others before they can be around their children
How is he as a parent? He may have been a terrible boyfriend but if heās a good parent then I would trust him to make good decisions for his child and not have anyone around them that would be dangerous.
1 Like
As someone who is the new girlfriend after a divorce, Iāve told my boyfriend that I want to meet his ex wife so that she knows me and so she and I can have a relationship and she can be comfortable with me being around their kids, and that I want to meet her before I meet their children. I want the three of us to be able to be civil at the bare minimum and be able to all be in the kids life without drama. The mom is definitely not in the wrong at all, she should know who is around her kids! Itās not about control, itās about respect.
19 Likes
Yeah thatās a no from me , anyone that is around her child , she should know.
3 Likes
She donāt have to know same as if she is with somebody she donāt have to introduce dad to her new boyfriend either it is dads time and dads choices just the same as when mom has him she can do what she wants. Unless dad is unfit then itās a different story but she needs to grow up and trust dads judgment she trusted him enough at one point to make a child with him
1 Like
I wouldnāt allowed the father to have unsupervised visits intil I met the girlfriend!! My boyfriend have two children by his ex wife. After dating a few months I met the mother of his children and then I met the children! 
If she had any respect for the children mother she would introduce her self!!!
7 Likes
Hard truth from experience, it is what it is. As long as she receives her child back healthy, happy, and clean thatās all that matters. I use to be like that, I HAVE to meet the GF thatās around my childrenā¦ butt all I say now is do you. But if my child is harmed in any way itās chitty chitty bang bang for you and your new GF.
All of yall say it isnāt her business well we just had a child killed by the dadās girlfriend in my town so YES it is her business! Stop ALL visits and get a court order
9 Likes
I mean yes Nd no, yes because meeting her is one thing, they have a CHILD together, BUT likeing that girlfriend and saying who he CAN and CANT date is another. Itās his house his business, his rules, as long as the child is happy, healthy, and safe. It doesnāt really matter.
No he should definitely let her meet his new gf! He would want the same. What parent doesnāt want to know whoās around their child!?
Regardless of hatred for the other parent, both parents still love the child and want to protect the child. Both parents have every right to know whoās around their babies when theyāre not there.
Of course you should meet her
I know every situation and co-parenting relationship is different, but I trusted my kids father enough that I never had to question who he had around our children. His private life was none of my business and mine was none of his. When we were ready, we would introduce each other to the new girlfriend/boyfriend. Our custody agreement stated that we have no control of who the other parent had around the kids during their parenting time, UNLESS we felt the child was in immediate danger. However, I will say I think itās super important for everyone to meet if it gets serious enough where the new girlfriend/boyfriend is taking on a parental role or anything like that. My ex and I thankfully had a good co-parenting relationship and I absolutely loved his girlfriend when I finally got to meet her.
2 Likes
I trust the father of my kids but I donāt always trust his judgment in people, especially since people can be fake in the beginning. I mean, weāve all been fooled by someone, right? I donāt let my kids around anyone I donāt know and that isnāt ever going to change. BOTH parents have a right to know who will be around their child!
They donāt āāhaveāā to meet with the mother. But it should be done out of courtesy.
3 Likes
Iāll never understand why women assume they have a right to approve of their exās next relationship.
2 Likes
I appaul her for wanting to do this for the safety of her child if dad doesnāt want to then heās probably hiding something so no visit for dad until he agrees JS
1 Like
100% she should meet her.
She absolutely has the right to know the type of people her ex has their child around.
1 Like
Iād be upset bc nobody gonna be around my child until I meet them it sounds like they have no respect for you
2 Likes
If it was a toxic relationship hes probably lieing to both of themā¦id go see her anyway
2 Likes
Help a mama out and respond anonymously on our forum. My friend wants to meet her exes new girlfriend but he won't allow it: Advice?
Legally he doesnāt have to introduce them but, to me, itās a little sketchy that he has a problem with it.
If it were me, I would be doing everything in my power to meet this woman, you canāt trust anybody these days, especially with your children. I hope she figures it out soon, I canāt imagine not knowing the kind of person my child is around.
1 Like
In my personal opinion, the mother deserves to know who is around her child as well as if the situation was turned around, parents are allowed to know exactly what kind of person is around their child id be upset too if I were in the situation Iād want to know who is around MY child that is my right as her mother.
11 Likes
She has every right to know whoās around her baby. I wouldnāt allow that. A mom has to put the best interest of her child first!
If the girlfriend is around her child that much then yeah she definitely needs to meet her once!
1 Like
Who dad has around the kids as long as no harm is done to the child or the child is being places in harms way. It NOT up the the mother. Would mom allow dad to say who she can have around the child doubt full.
6 Likes
You people do realize thatās his kid too right? No matter the history.
2 Likes
No sheās not if I canāt meet her my child wonāt be around her if that means you wonāt either oh well!!! My child safety is first not your feelings
4 Likes
Unless the child is being hurt, it doesnāt matter. She gets her time and he gets his and thatās all the law will see as well.
1 Like
Yah. Heās in the wrong. Parents have a right to know whoās around their children. The courts will see it that way too. Itās time to make their custody arrangements official.
3 Likes
Tell her to take him to court
1 Like
Naā¦if I canāt meet you, you canāt be around my child. Period.
3 Likes
In a perfect world they would all meet and be civil but dude seems like a class act so she should just pick her battles w that one
If he isnāt a harm to the children then what he does with his new partner is absolutely none of her business
1 Like
Hell no. Keep ur kids safe
.no strangers.
1 Like
Yeah no shes needs to meet her and if not Iād tell that mf to take me to court youāll have supervised visits I would not care
2 Likes
You dont get to dictate to a father who he has around their own child. Been there done that with my spouses ex and mine. Parenting time is seperate and neither parent has to at any point legally have to introduce you or give any information about who the child is around. The courts donāt give a shit who is around your child unless you have proof of a reason they shouldnāt be, like neglect or harm to a child. Dads parenting time is dads decisions and dads call just like the mother. Cheating is one thing, heās a shit boyfriend but that has nothing to with the child or what he does with his child, it is completley seperate and not the other parents buisness. However itās the decent thing to do if both parties are amicable. If theirs been alot of drama and by the sounds of their history their is and dad does not have to comply. The courts look at this behavior as malicious, controlling and will not entertain these kind of requests. Mom sounds jealous and thatās exactly what the court will think too, sheās scorn over their history and wants to be in control.
If dad has safety concerns then it should be a court issue otherwise you have no right to demand to meet anyone he has around said child.
9 Likes
Help a mama out and respond anonymously on our forum. My friend wants to meet her exes new girlfriend but he won't allow it: Advice?
Help a mama out and respond anonymously on our forum. My friend wants to meet her exes new girlfriend but he won't allow it: Advice?
1 Like
I donāt think itās asking too much. Especially with his past reputation. However youāre probably not going to get anywhere with baby daddy and new girlfriend. So I would just take them to court. I think itās the most civil way to do things when one person doesnāt want to co-parent.
37 Likes
I think sheās absolutely in the right to want to know who is around her child. I donāt know the custody agreement, but it seems illegal for the ex to refuse a meeting. I would let them know that she will bring this up with her lawyer. Because itās highly inappropriate for him not only to have A stranger around the baby, but refusing to meet with the mom. I hope this helps.
6 Likes
Well I did not meet or have I ever spoken to her. My son have been around her at age 6 or 7 till now he 15, He is with his Father and I have to trust that he will keep our child safe. My child has had a phone at age 5 so he can always call me if he feel unsafe. ( There are rules) cause the same over here he has not meet my boyfriend. He trust that I will keep his son safe. His father is there for him anytime anyday. So trust that he will give his child the best care. Long as you know where they live you do drop off and pick ups. You call Him and check up. And set rules. Do all this with him cause in the end she a none factor until he say ido.
2 Likes
Nope Iād want to know who my child was around just as much as dad should want to know if mum had a new partner x
11 Likes
Fact of the matter is, when the child is with the father he is responsible for the safety of the child. If it is court ordered then baby mama donāt have to know anybody. Although we want to know whoās around our children, when the relationship is over itās over in youāre not entitled to request. If the child has already been around the new girlfriend 5 times then just let it happen. Heās probably gas-lighting her and has said all type of horrible things and thatās why he broke up with her. He doesnāt want the new girlfriend and the ex-girlfriend to have a relationship because the topic would be about him anyway and his 19 relationships. Tell your girlfriend to just go ahead and get her nails and hair done and enjoy the free time she has without the baby.
4 Likes
My ex isnt allowed to take my kids near his new gf. He knows it. If he did do it behind my back then it would be back to supervised contact. You need to feel comfortable with who is around your child. Good luck. Xx
11 Likes
Just a thought. Is the new gf a friend of hers or his during the relationship and one of them didnāt care for or trust her so heās hiding her. PLEASE PLEASE stay on this. Also you could wIt until he comes to get the child and say ok WEāRE ready. I am going to because I am not comfortable with the situation. I go or he dont.
6 Likes
Itās not too much at all. Baby daddy sounds like a piece of work and Birds of a feather flock together. If heās a crappy person she may be to and itās completely fair to see if sheās suitable to be around their child. How are you gonna not see if someone safe enough to be around your kid when youāre not there to protect them
My exās girlfriend shook my daughter and threw her against the wall. She was 2 and barely survived. There is nothing wrong with checking her out but sometimes the bad stuff shows up later. Good luck.
40 Likes
probably needs parenting plan fromthe courtā
7 Likes
I believe the court holds only the father responsible, they canāt infringe on his personal life unless the child is in danger or being neglected
Serious question, is the mom wanting to truly meet the new gf for the well being of their child or is she still salty of the ex? I ask bc I feel as if thatās the reason the ex boyfriend refuses the meet bc he knows itāll just turn in to a fight && no kid needs to witness that!!! Maybe dad is keeping them apart for the well being of the child 
in which that may change once the dad sees a change in the mom && can tell that she is no longer angry and hurtā¦ HOWEVER, I do believe that each parent has the right to know who is around their child!!! Just as if the mom gets a new bf 
BUT FOR THE LOVE OF GOD PPL, quit letting everyone around your children!!! Your child doesnāt need to meet everyone youāre dating! 
I feel as if the parent should be dating the other person for A WHILE before they let them meet their child/children
3 Likes
For all she knows it could be a junkie around her kid, I demand it, Iāll show up at his house idc, thatās MY babyās safety potentially at risk for all I know.
2 Likes
I wouldnt allow my child to go without me until I felt that the new gf was gonna love and treat my child as she would her own child. Its disrespectful of them to be that way when the child is hers to.
4 Likes
Nope. Mom deserves to know the person her child is around. Thereās absolutely nothing wrong with wanting to know the person thatās going to be around your kid.
2 Likes
You should ask the dad if heās heard of situations like #justiceformalakai doesnāt matter how well dad thinks he knows her 
Iāve heard of instances where step mom may have thrown boiling water on step son and threw him down stairs into concrete wall. As a parent nowadays you have to assume any one is capable of anything. Even child care āspecialistsā get in trouble for abuse and neglect.
11 Likes
Take him to court and hash it out. He obviously is putting his girlfriend before your child. My ex has told me numerous times if who he is with canāt respect that we coparent and its strictly for the kids then they can hit the road. We have not been together in 13 years and donāt plan on being together ever again , but he takes being a dad first before anything.
3 Likes
Question, how old is the baby? how does the baby feel? Has the baby made any new changes, in behaviour, temperament etc?
4 Likes
Get a lawyer, and be assured ā THEN you will get to meet the new girlfriend before the child is ever legally allowed to visit them. All you will have to do is explain the situation to the judge, and he/she will make sure of it. Let the court do your mediation for you.
Parents have every right to know who is around their child. After a divorce, neither parent should expose the child to their dates. If a new relationship is turning serious then and only then should the child be introduced and the ex as well.
3 Likes
There should be nothing to hide surelyā¦ And she should do the same when she finds a man.
2 Likes
Sounds familiar I think nothing wrong with you knowing whoās around your child especially with that many partners at the same time most probably doesnāt want you to do you donāt mention the other 19 odd females if he was doing that to you heās definitely doing it to her
4 Likes
Nope. She should know who is around her child
1 Like
Not overreacting! Too many bf/gf hurt/kill children that arenāt theirs. If you donāt meet, your child stays with you and the ex can come to your home to see your child.
15 Likes
Heck no your not over reacting if you canāt meet the new gf something is shady you donāt think for a minute that if you have a bf he would want to meet him.
3 Likes
If sheās going to be a part of her childās life, I feel that the mother has a right to at least meet herā¦
2 Likes
No not overreacting, a mother has a right to know who her child is around for her childās safety and given the past of her ex going around with multiple people and not just sticking to one serious thing at a time I think itās a good thing to worry because if I was a parent and things didnāt work out with my partner I wouldnāt want people coming in and out of my childās life I would want someone to want to be there and to want to be in my ex partners life to make them happy
I would wanna know. When my sons father finds a new gf or if I get a new bf we agreed meeting. Itās important.
2 Likes
If she doesnāt trust the father of the child to keep the child safe then why is said child there?
2 Likes
The baby daddy and gf are wrong. The mother has the right to meet the woman that is with her ex. Itās not that she wants to be mean to her , she just wants to see who is around her child and what kind of influence they are having on the child
1 Like
Lets flip the roles and say i asked to meet my baby mommas new boyfriend and when he comes around for the first time hey assaults me in-front of my kid how would that pan out
At the end of the day as much as it sucks, itās not up to her to make that call and the courts will say as such.
Both parents have the right to know WHO is around their kids, both parents.
Thankfully I have a court order for weekends Nd holidays. I take my son near whoever the fuck I want. . And my x doesnāt have a say in it .
1 Like
Go to court ask a Judge, its a reasonable request.
2 Likes
The mother has all the right to meet the gf, and if it donāt happen take him back to court and tell the courts it should be supervised instead. He will get mad and change his mind, but she has all the rights to see who is by her child
3 Likes
Probably worried she might get her ass kicked, or itās one of her besties. 
2 Likes
Does mom introduce everyone she has around their child to the ex? If yes, then she has a point. If no, then no.
1 Like
Like, seriously, aside from cheating on the mother, is there anything that would suggest the father would out the child in harmās way? Bringing the child around his now girlfriend is no worse than having his beer buddies over when the child is around.
If he has a history of questionable activities that could endanger the child, then supervised visits would be recommended to go to court over, but arring that, introducing the child to anyone that is not the mother does not suggest the child is in any way at risk just because the mother doesnāt know them.
1 Like
Itās not her business ā¦ same goes for her personal life is not his business. They had a child together and either co parent to the benefit of the child or act like controlling immature idiots and look for trouble because she has a grudge. If he is not a fit parent then take it to court and there had better proof otherwise stay out of each others personal business.
1 Like
Just show up, youāll meet her then lol
1 Like
I would insist on meeting her
I think itās a responsible thing to do. If be questioning why he doesnāt want them to meet her.
Absolutely not. I would refuse to let my baby be around her until I meet her. What is her ex afraid of - his new gf must not be too great if he is ashamed to let mama meet her.
Anyone who will be spending time with your child needs to be known to you. Heās proven he canāt be trusted
Let the courts decide, everybody too emotional
If I cant meet her, my child canāt go! 
1 Like
Leave the situation alone leave him he will do it again
She meets her or child doesnt visit. Period
Check the Lawson your stateā¦some dont allow cohabitationā¦
If there is no court ordered visitation then she doesnāt have to allow the baby to go to the fathers house, sighting possible unsafe environment, however, if the baby has indeed been constantly around this unknown female for 4-5 months, and there have been no signs of neglect, abuse or emotional or other trauma to the child, then this is very unnecessary. I find it odd that now that there is knowledge of this female being around, all of a sudden there is a thought of the child being unsafe? Please do not use the child as an excuse for drama, thatās honestly what this sounds like to me. Donāt fall into the power struggle games of control of the other parent using the child.
2 Likes
Iāll give you a perspective from the opposite sex. No person, mother or not, will tell me how to raise my children nor will they hold any power over who I decide MY children will be around. The people I bring my children around, I trust. I canāt speak for EVERY man because Iāve met some extraordinary pieces of shit in my lifetime and that goes for both fathers AND mothers. I donāt know the specifics of this father other than he cheatsā¦a lot. Maybe heās changed, maybe not, but if you threaten him with supervised visitation I can guarantee you it will only cause more division and he and, possibly, the children will resent you. Just my thoughts.
1 Like
Iād keep my kid home if I wasnāt able to meet her. As the mother, I am absolutely entitled to know who my child is around. Past history has nothing to do with this either, I feel this way anyhow.
1 Like
Mother has every right to know who her child is around. Not sure how to go about it to enforce a meeting legally but as a parent, mom or dad, they have every right. 
1 Like
She needs to take it to court. The court will likely look at the potential damage to the child. If she can prove the infidelity, esp to that degree, heāll be lucky to have supervised visitation.
Wouldnāt be around my kids at all. A childās welfare is more important than an ego and a new bird. Just not at all. This is your child. Your in charge. The rules should be set out. Yes see the child but you do not introduce them to your latest flame. Without sitting down and meeting them yourself. If he wont then fight me in court. I found out my ex was playing happy families with a tramp who had 4 kids removed by social services. He was told he doesnāt see my kid when he see her. Told him why. He dumped her as she lied to him too.