I have a friend with a 20-month-old, and the baby has 0 words. The baby is one of the happiest kids I’ve ever met, and when we stick to a routine, he has FLAWLESS DAYS. When he gets mad, tho or not his way, he pounds his head into things, and I really think that has to come down to communication. Her doctors for the baby and her family and I have been pushing her to get him tested and maybe speech therapy. She wants to wait till he is two or possibly 3 bc she wants to see if he will start to talk on his own Any recommendations.
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Mind your own business 💁
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Tell the pediatrician ASAP!
Not your baby. All you can do is make a suggestion. It’s up to her. 🤷
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My best friend has a double doctorate didn’t talk until she was 5
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Make the suggestion that she get an evaluation. It can’t hurt.
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I am sure your heart is in the right place and you have made your thoughts known to her but at the end of the day it is not your child and you need to respect her decision.
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Have the child screened for autism.
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Maybe autism my youngest always been quite but we waited on him now 3 he’s finally talking and speaking small sentences and we are about to get him tested for autism my oldest was a little behind and really struggles socially but other then that he’s ok he has autism my e year old is very smart and so is my 9 year old some are a little slow at first but once they get a grasp of the situation they really take off from there is say leave her be right now and see if it gets worse and also look for signs of autism or ADHD
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I didnt talk until I was almost 3
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4 out of 5 of my children didn’t speak until age 3 or 4. One due to hearing loss, one due to Autism, and two just because 
. They all speak perfect now and only two of them required speech therapy. Some children just don’t want to speak.
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As the parent of a special needs child I can say early intervention makes a difference. As a mother I’d like to say while you may have the best intentions let her raise her child. You don’t get to decide her timelines or what’s best for her child. Put yourself in her shoes.
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She can start teaching him signs, but 20 months isn’t abnormal to not talk. Or to have issues with feelings and communication. You can suggest and encourage whatever you want, but ultimately you have to just mind your own business 
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Different children speak at different rates. But hearing can slow it down. Mine is 3 in 6 months and still only says a few words. That is due to a medical reason
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Well, it’s not your child and it’s not your place to tell the mother what to do for her child. You might not know that the mother could already be fretting about it and talking to doctors but not disclosing anything to anyone because she wants to know what’s going on first.
I worked with one child who was non verbal until he was almost 4. Some kids take longer than others, just be patient and if your friend comes to you about it just be there for her.
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I had the same issue with my 20month old son. She needs to ask the general gp to check the babies ears. My son had fluid behind his ear drums. Which caused them to have no movement which ment no hearing. It can be as simple as that. I paid a lot of money for a peadiatrician for no answers.
Honey all I can say is let the mom handle it.
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My son wasn’t speaking much until he was around 2.5 then the floodgates open and he just started speaking like he was doing it all along. Has he had his hearing checked? I understand her wanting to wait it out, some kids just need a little time and it doesn’t mean anything is wrong.
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Mind your own business! All kids are different some talk earlier then other some of them talk later then others 
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Well, not to be an ass, but not your kid.
Also, my nephew is 3 and still doesn’t talk. My oldest nephew didn’t talk until he was almost 2.
Both are smart and healthy and my oldest nephew never shuts up 
Don’t know how it is where your friend is but my daughter went to speech therapy but the services stopped on her 3rd birthday. Is the child just recently learning how to walk? A child will focus either on the walking or talking if they are in the process of learning both of them. Tell her there is no shame in getting help for her child…I was so glad we did.
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In georgia they have Babies Cant Wait, its a program for speech and physical therapy for kids up to age 3. Maybe something to look into and speak to the child’s doctor about as well
It’s not uncommon atall for a 20month old child to not speak does the child say mum? And children toddlers have tantrums bang there heads for attention… hit… slap throw objects… ide say. I think a mum knows best in most cases if the child is healthy and eating drinking I don’t think it’s a problem.
Not your kid, not your business 
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This isn’t your child, not your business. My kiddo didn’t talk until he was almost 3, he’s fine. You don’t sound like a good friend if you can’t respect her wishes.
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Early intervention is going to be the best thing.
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Mind your kids or if you have none mind your business.some kids actually start talking late and theres nothing wrong with them .
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Unless the mom asked you for advice/help, mind your damn business. 
That’s not particularly concerning. Your friend is right not to freak out about her kid.
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my 5 year old banged his head from around 9 months until 2 … His doctor said it was normal and he hasn’t had any other signs of any type of delays. Speech delays can be normal for that age too. these things together and separately don’t automatically mean autism or any other issues. Sometimes it’s just normal
Honestly it sounds like baby needs to be evaluated for autism…
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I waited with my oldest because I thought it was due to how clingy he was with his pacifier. Come to find out he had aprixia…not a great idea to wait. I understand some kids take longer, but in this case it doesn’t sound like a good idea.
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My son didn’t talk til he was three and we found out when he was two that he has autism that also can be a factor
Maybe if she already has other people shoving it down her throat she needs you more as a friend not another person nagging her. Some kids dont speak until older.
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Early intervention usually wants to wait for speech therapy until two years old for typical kids (my kid has special needs so he’s received speech since three months old). She could still ask her pediatrician for the referral for an evaluation because it could take a couple months. Definitely don’t wait until three. The earlier the better.
My son didn’t really talk till he was 2.5 -3. Some kids just take longer.
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2 of my 3 have had speech issues. I will say the quicker you get early intervention the better off they are. My middle one for example was diagnosis with global learning delays. Speech being the biggest issues. Early intervention had him completely caught up and in some places ahead of his peers by kindergarten. He has no long term effect for the early speech issues. He is now 14.
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Most doctors do wait until baby has their 2 year check up THEN refer for speech therapy and any other subsequent evaluations.
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That is actually super concerning! Ex: My daughter wasn’t screened until she was 3, she didn’t talk properly until she was 4.5 but that was after she started therapy. Her doctor thinks she has ASD but they aren’t equipped to do that much invasive testing so we are on a waiting list with a larger facility. She’s now 5 and doing better but it’s still good to know for sure. He needs to be screened by his doctor because all of that sounds exactly like ASD (autism).
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It’s for the child’s doctor to tell this mother if she needs to intervene. There are kids who don’t start talking until 3 and nothing is wrong. There are kids who deserve help and their parents won’t see the truth. Bottom line is… if you’ve shared your thoughts, and the dr, and the family too… Mom gets final say, right or wrong. If she’s not endangering the baby’s life, let her be.
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He should be evaluated but as you stated friends and doctors have already told her this so there’s nothing you can do and I don’t understand what exactly you’re asking advice for. He’s not your child so if she wants to wait against all recommendations then that’s her decision.
Everyone can tell her what she should and shouldn’t do. But ultimately it is her choice. Everyone coming at her is probably making her feel like crap about her parenting.
Not your child. Not your problem. Not your choice. If she has chose to do it this way than leave her be and respect her parenting.
Yea, it is very uncommon for 20 month old to not be saying any words by now. But I’msure he mumbles and tries, maybe not to you but the people he is more comfortable around. But she is the parent. My son is 3 years 3 months old and has only started talking more and more words after starting preschool. Before preschool he was saying at least 30 words and phrases to mainly me. Everyone else was talking about how he wont talk and making me feel like shit because I see other kids his age talking sentences. Everyone coming at me about it only made me feel worse. His pediatrician wasnt all that concerned since he would talk some words and communicate his wants and needs to me.
Stay out of it. Not your kid!!!
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As a mom with two special needs children, I would personally have said what you did. I started getting my sons evaluated at 16 and 18 months. Thank goodness I did. I did NOT stop getting opinions until I felt like someone listened to me. My sons are almost 10, and almost 8 now. One has adhd (inattentive type) the other has severe adhd (hyperactive) and a sensory processing disorder) AND he is about to get evaluated for autism. BOTH of them pulled their hair and smashed their heads on things. Your concerns are legit. However the mother is going to do what she wants to do with her child. As far as you and being around the child, just educate yourself about different childhood disorders. Although I’d be an annoying little shit until my friend listened to me… (out of strictly love and concern) it doesn’t seem like your friend will budge. Just be supportive and continue watching him. Maybe when and if she does decide to get him evaluated, you can provide that feedback to when you were paying close attention to him. (Not saying she isn’t) Getting a child evaluated is a long process and they always want the perspective of others that are around him. I’d welcome with an open heart, another parents view point about my child. Without getting offended. Because at the end of the day, I could be missing something too. Just tell her you are concerned and you will be there for her 
good luck!
Mind your own children. They all lesrn at differsnt paces. He’s not even 2!!!
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We have what’s called early on. It works with toddlers up to age 3.
Preschool prep dvds. Taught my son his shapes letters colors number before 2
I know you’re coming from a loving place, but with everyone else speaking to her about this, just be her friend. Be there for her. She’s probably struggling and In denial
He definitely needs evaluation for therapies he should be doing them already.
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Nothing wrong with expressing concern, but if have then drop it, not your child or your decision
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My friend thought her son couldn’t talk till she got a baby monitor and she heard him over it chatting and some of it was actual words. Turns out hes a smart kids just really shy and has a hard time talking in front of people. He is getting a lot better talking in front of people now that he’s a little older.
My advice: wait. They don’t do testing till they are 3 years old so you might as well wait and try to encourage him. Put on learning music during the day (ABC’s, counting, baby songs), cartoons (limit time so he’s not sitting in front of a TV all day), and, use flash cards with pictures and read books (he will pick out he’s favourite eventually).
If you’re not paying her bills, mind your own business.
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Do not wait until he is 3! The sooner the better. By 24 mo he should be saying two to three word sentences. Coming from experience, speech therapy works!
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He needs to get started now. I waited until my first was 4 and it was to long.
My son didn’t start REALLY picking up words until just after 2. Give it time.
My daughter was 2 years and she was not talking , I did have her evaluated and yes she did have a speech delay, she was a happy baby but she was in her own world at the same time she would not even call me mama or anything I did go on to start receiving devices at hone for her but honestly it was stressing her so much because she had 3 different teachers coming within the week so I stopped services . I later on when she was 3 opted to have her go to an early intervention school which she was fine but again not much progress , very little so during a meeting it was decided since she was older we can go back to receiving services at home with that being said the lil progress she had made she ended up regressing so at this point I put my daughters mental health before anything and let her be . When I stopped services was when she started talking little by little on her own hearing her older sister and being around her younger brother hearing them helped a lot . My point is as a mom you sometimes know best I tried whatever help was available and she regressed . Every child is different my daughter finally started talking more at 4 and now you can’t stop her from talking she still receives speech therapy at school and she is 7 now . Let the mom decide what is best as a mom your momma instinct tells you if it’s something serious enough . Yes she should if possible have the child evaluated but like I said all kids are different and develop and reach their milestones differently.
My 12 yr old son had issues once he hit age 3. wasnt really a talker at all till age 5. He would slam his head into the walls or hurt himself. He was very aggressive in prek until age 7. He is adhd and has anxiety with sensory issues.
Took a lot of fighting to get his dr to help when he was young.
ONLY parents with kids who have medical issues will understand this.
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Mind you own freaking business
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Stay out of it! I know you just care, but not your kid period! I know a couple of kids that did same thing and they turned out just fine. If you keep him through the day, then i dont think it could hurt to work with him, don’t push him tho or he will feel that and could end up not communicating at all. Just ask him what he wants and tell him to show you, then when he does, in a happy voice say (ex. If its a book) “book” and point to it while you are saying it. Gradually keep doing this with things and let him pick up on his own time.
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My son started talking around 4. We had early intervention but it didn’t work. My son hits his self dr said fine as long as he isn’t hurting himself.
My daughter spoke very little and we had her hearing tested and found out she could not hear due to fluid on the ears. Got tubes and started speech therapy and she’s doing great now! 
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Waiting is a mistake. I had the opposite problem with my son’s doctor who pushed the delay off as being an only child and not in daycare. The early intervention starts the better. It sounds like she may be in denial that there is a problem. True, he could just be a bit delayed with no problem, but it doesn’t hurt to have him evaluated. There could be a physical issue, like being tongue tied, that can be corrected, or an auditory reason for him not talking. If there is a more serious issue, she is wasting precious time.
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Kids are like popcorn, they are all in a bag an when you heat up the bag some pop faster than others. Her kid will pop when their ready.
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Showing signs of autism. Needs to see specialists now.
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Suggest baby sign language. And hopefully doctor suggests help.
A speech therapist is good. I didn’t read anything that would recommend testing if speech is his only problem. If he throws a tantrum because he doesn’t get his way he needs discipline. Him learning to talk better and even sign language would be good. I’ve found books to be really helpful with my son that needed a speech therapist shortly after 2. We didn’t see her long and I picked up on a lot of things myself. The library is free and a good resource to all parents. My 3 year old loves books and picked up on many words because of us reading books often. For this little one the first words books would be good and he needs to be talked to all the time. In short terms he can understand and repeat. Mom needs to start with one word. And then two. Fast car, soft cat for example. If he’s not picking up one word he should get tested. Learning starts for little ones way before school and they want to learn. It’s something we need to encourage and teach. They want to know about the world but need help to do so.
My sons 21 months, doesn’t talk. He’s perfect.
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My son turned 2 in november and barely talks and has a temper himself. He will kick hit scream throw himself backwards out of your arms etc when hes mad. Where im from its considered normal for 18months to 3 years to act this way, by 3 if they dont say a single word drs will make parents intervene, but until then they say its normal to not talk at all/much depending on exact age till 3 years. My son is very advanced in everything but speech, he can talk knows a lot of words ive heard him use them while playing but he choices not to talk to people at all even myself hardly.
I’d seek help. I did for my son as he lost speech around 18mths of age. He was hard to understand at 4. He had speech therapy for a couple of years and now at 8 he has an excellent vocabulary.
In our case speech was something he picked up later.
Better to be safe than sorry
All kids learn at different rates. It might even be that they know how to say words but don’t want to! Regardless, mind your own business. Crazy that you put something on here about your friend kid without making sure she’s ok with it first!!
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at the very least start speech therapy …
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My first child didn’t talk till he was 2 and a half,all children are different
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Yes. Recommendation #1, mind your own business. Her child, her rules. To assume you know more about her son than she does is not only laughable, it’s rude as fuck. Recommendation #2, realize that not all children develop at the same speed, my daughter was speaking in full sentences at 1.5 years old, my brother didn’t say his first word until he was almost 3.
My son was exactly the same way. I use to post the alphabet, colors and numbers on the walls around the house and, I helped him to say, the letters, colors and numbers back to me everyday. Help you’re child to make sentences and, then have him/her read it back to you. In time they will come around, and they will never stop talking or ask questions.
I would say Autism I would start getting all the test started because it takes a long time to go through it all.
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Maybe he don’t like you so that’s why he didn’t talk with you around
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All kids develop different. The tantrums are normal. They test every button possible. To get a reaction out of you. My kid was limited on words. I refused speech therapy. At 3 she wont stop talking lol. So give it time. Let kid be a kid.
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At 18 months a baby can speak 5 or more words and it’s considered normal! Babies will do things on their own! Just as walking! He’s not your baby
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I recommend you let the mother handle it …everyone expressed their suggestions and their opinions to her and that is all you can do .don’t bring the subject up again or you risk losing the friendship
It’s not your place to tell her what to do or think. You’re not with the baby 24/7 to know, You set a routine for your friends child? It seems like you’re overstepping your role. If you expressed concern, there’s no need to push it nor mention it more than once. She’s aware and maybe she doesn’t want to tell you if she’s taken the child to see a specialist since that’s her business.
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How about minding your business? The boy is not even 2 yet. If his mother wants to wait until he’s 3 who are you to keep trying to push her? My 7 year old didn’t talk right away and once he started talking people were trying to tell me that he needed a speech therapist. I finally folded and took him to an early intervention program to have him evaluated. They tested speech and cognitive skills. He passed with flying colors. He’s now in 2nd grade reading on a 3rd grade level. Every since he’s started school he’s been 1 grade level ahead in reading. So you see, kids do things on THEIR time not YOURS. 
A lot of kids don’t start talking until after 2! My youngest of 4 didn’t start until 28 months but talks great now, he’s 3 in February!
If her doctor is concerned, I’d hope she would get him evaluated just to figure it out as early as possible, but all you can do is remind her of how beneficial early diagnosis is!
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My baby didn’t talk until 2. My doctor said he sees it a lot in children with stay at home parents or who recieve more attention because taking isn’t necessary to communicate so they wait til they are interested in talking.
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If he is struggling with speech learn and teach some baby sign language. I had concerns about my son about 18 months old the tested his hearing first. This is common in slow language. He tested at 9 months in his speech, but he was able to communicate with sign. Small things, eat, drink, more, all done, etc. No joke, he literally woke up one day before turning 2 aaaaand said “good morning mama” he hasnt shut up since lmao. Every kid is different. But start with sign
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Mind your business…?
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Let your friend deal with her baby.
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My doctors waited till she was 2 years old then recommend speech therapy. We have it though early intervention and her speech therapist comes to our house once a week
It’s her child if it doesn’t want to listen to the doctor then that’s up to her. I wouldn’t push her because that can cause tension between you and her
Yeah she really needs to go ahead and have him tested because he could be hard of hearing or autistic and the quicker she has it done the quicker they can help him. I have a child who is autistic so he started having problems about that age but trust me the quicker you have it seen about the quicker they can help them
People saying its normal for an almost 2 year old to NOT talk!? 🤦🤦 absolutely false. Between 18 months-2 years a child should be able to say and understand multiple words and even working on putting words together! Some children take more time, YES, but if this child isnt speaking at all and head banging when angry then they obviously are having trouble communicating and needs to be evaluated. You’re a good friend for trying to encourage the mother to get testing done. My niece was two, only babbled didnt say many actual words only a few and the doctor was very adamant on having her hearing tested and speech therapy. Better safe than sorry. She’d be one upset mom if she came to find out her child is having serious issues and she decided to wait to get him tested!
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Don’t wait. I waited and my son was later diagnosed with autism. It was hard to get him help to catch up because he was so far behind.
In the opinion of the cas … its NOT normal for a child to not have any words by 12m! Milestones have been missed and more than one, the child would have had OT and Speech by now and ears tested. So even though u may be correct, unless you wanna lose the friendship… let her do her.
My son did this and was diagnosed with Autism. I got him into therapy asap.
Stay in your lane! The three-year-old I nanny for didn’t start talking until he was a little over two and it was very hard to understand him if you weren’t with him day in and day out and it was only 5 to 6 words that he could say. That continued until he was almost 3 and then he just woke up one day talking and has literally never stopped lol. He will talk the ear off of anyone that will stand there long enough to listen. The only people that need to be concerned about his speech is his parents and his doctors. As long as she is taking him to his routine check ups, it’s not your business.
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Even if this person was your sister or brother this child isn’t yours. You could ruin your friendship by stepping into something that you have no business to. No matter if you have the best intentions you are basically telling them you know better than them.
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One one my children did not start talking u till 2 or 2 and a half years of and it was ok but each child go at there Owen time you push the child the child woint want to do anything and if your her friend all you can do is be there far the decision she makes
My son wasn’t talking by 2 and the drs tried to give me that “boys develope slower” and he was diagnosed with ASD at age 3. We were able to get him into speech and OT at 3and into school at 3. Early intervention!!!
I wear hearing aids, I have needed them since I was born. I didn’t get them till high school, I failed a lot of classes because my mom thought she didn’t need to test more. Try to be supportive towards her and explain why you think it’s important. I’m not saying it’s hearing issues but I’m sharing my experience on how it affected me.
If it’s a delay waiting will only make the delay greater. I know in North Texas at least children under three who qualify for intervention (occupational, speech, other therapies) can get it for free through ECI (early childhood intervention). You can see if there is something similar in your area. For us just because the parents submit to having the child tested with ECI does not mean they have go go through with the therapy.