Theres a couple at my church that were going through the same thing, he didnt say ‘I watch it a little or occasionally’ he came out and said ‘I’m addicted to it’, not just normal porn either but cam girls, live porn basically. it was effecting their sex life a lot and theyre intimacy as well. He started counseling with our pastor and they went on a small hiatus as a couple i.e sleeping seperately and going on weekly ‘dates’, he abstained from anything sexual for 6 months or so I think, not even kissing, and continued counseling and stuff and finally they restarted their relationship. From what I know (my brother is friends with him) they’re back together full time now and doing very well. She still has some trust issues, but they’re both really trying it seems.
He’s a man. Men watch porn. It is normal. Be a good wife and let it happen. You are making it sound like he’s a sex addict and has no morals and values. Watch it with him sometimes. It will help your marriage if you back off. It’s really your issue not his
He lies because he doesnt lile your reactions. Maybe learn to talk to your husband so he doesnt need to walk on egg shells around you.
what did I just read
My husband and i went through something similar. He was watching porn and avoiding being intimate with me and I SWORE he was cheating. He was in a way, adultery starts in the heart. But when he finally came clean a whole year into our marriage I was absolutely livid. Sex had been an issue for awhile so when I found out he was withholding it from me and using girls on a video screen, I was SO ready to walk away.
Society will tell you that “men watch porn” and “to leave him alone” but that is NOT the way to handle this. He needs to talk to a male from your church or maybe get involved in a group that can help him through this and help hold himself accountable. Unfortunately, he will only give it up when he is ready to. You’ll have to pray and seek God on this issue as well. It’s not easy and I understand completely how devestating it can be.
Watch porn too, even it out
Appreciate his honestly, be open about your hurt, and move forward. Together. Lying isn’t okay, regardless of the reasoning behind it. He wants to avoid the issues dishonestly caused much like a child does, as adults we must face out choices snd their consequences. Also, his lack of sexual appetite may be due to him handling his business by watching porn. Perhaps you can both work on your sex life and leave the porn behind. Best of luck.
Watch it together, might learn some new things. 🤷
Watch it with him 
MOST men watch porn. I don’t get why you feel betrayed. It’s not like he’s going out and messing around with other girls. And Maybe change how you react. There’s no reason he should be scared of your reaction.
Obviously if he’s watched it multiple times he doesn’t share your views on it being wrong, he just says he does to not upset you, which is not really how healthy communication usually works. I can understand you aren’t into it, but if he’s not like obsessed or addicted to it, I personally would feel greatful he turned to porn in a rough relationship patch than to another woman which is what many people would do. He shouldn’t feel nervous or worried about being honest with you either, you should both have an understanding and open view when it comes to each other and your relationship. Figure out what you are doing to make it difficult for him to communicate honestly with you, and work on being able to talk to each other honestly. There’s absolutely zero reason to make him feel ashamed of this or like he is in the wrong.
Religion is a man made belief/ Doctrine. Made to control people.
Belief in the higher power doesn’t exist only in religious beliefs.
Human nature includes sexual desires.
Take some psychology classes, sociology classes and explore (yes go against your religion) to really enlighten yourself.
Your faith is a given, it can’t be taken away… but trying to live in such a restricted box of belief won’t help you.
which of the ten commandment says thou shalt not watch porn? Is it right under the one that says thou shalt hate gay people?
I hope everyone who watches porn knows that when your watching a video remember this you are supporting sex trafficking
And now I feel like I traveled back in time. Time warp, anyone?
If he truly believed like you did he wouldn’t do it. Now if you have an issue with porn that’s fine he should respect that and y’all should come up with a middle ground. Now this whole it’s porn I’d rather him do that then out cheating that’s the thing I can’t stand. Porn has nothing to do with cheating. Unless that’s how you view it in your relationship. You also should take a look at how you react when he tells you the truth fix that and maybe he will be honest with you.
Could try spicing things up in the bedroom, and or making yalls own private sex videos for him to watch if he gets an urge. (If that doesn’t go against your beliefs) With you not wanting him to touch you though, theres definitely gotta be a conversation before any sort of moving forward. I imagine finding a compromise will work better than repression though. Such as finding porn yall both like and can watch together, like others have suggested. Best of luck to yall.
I would look into couciling. Many couples I know, the male gets so conditioned that only porn works, it is sad really.
Pray and Turn it over to God…on his behalf and yours…as a Christian you know God is real and God will answer prayers…May not be the answer you want but God will work it out in his time and his way.
I’m sorry you’re going through this and I’ll admit that I 100% don’t understand what it’s like because I’m not religious, but I would just be happy about two things: 1.) that he even admitted it to you, and 2.) that he’s doing that instead of cheating. Not that someone should just go out and cheat if they’re not getting sex, but people do it. Him admitting it and you guys going to counseling tells me you will be okay and things will work out!
You are missing out!
Watch it with it or basically mine your business. To.me it isn’t my business when he watches porn,Jack’s off etc. It’s his body and as long as he isn’t touching anyone else this isn’t hurting me. You just said he wont tell you the truth because of the way you react to it. Then your saying you don’t want him to touch so of course he lies and watches porn. Ffs people have needs as well as MOST people watch porn. As for religious reasons ir doesn’t look like he sees it at wrong. Which is ok too. He doesn’t have to believe the same as you. Express you concern with not being touched by him enough but I guess until you want him to that doesn’t matter either. Communication is key and yall dont have it.
Porn is not a sin you’re married maybe you could even enjoy it together.
I do not understand why women pry about trivial things. I could care less if he watches porn. We have a great sex life. Badgering him about watching porn and then not even attempting to have sex…is depravity on a whole new level. It’s petty honestly. How can you expect him to get active in the bedroom when you don’t even try? Stop nagging and start enjoying your HUSBAND! You don’t wanna be touched by him and that’s part of the problem. You’re punishing him for being a sexual being. Imagine how he feels!
Its freaking porn not a prostitute
I would be grateful that he has not cheated on you, and was only watching porn. Most men do watch porn, however I would be worried that he has backed away from intimacy with you. I would tell him you forgive him for his lies he told you, as long as he is telling the truth about not cheating. It sounds to me like you need to spice up your marriage, and remember why you fell in love with each other in the first place. It sounds like you need to be spontaneous again, and have fun with each other like you used to. You definitely should not back away from sex. You should probably get aggressive and initiate it. Bring back the feelings you had about each other, before you had children and fell into a routine. 
Goodluck!
You eat pizza with a fork and say things like " i don’t like the taste of penis" huh 
Count your blessings that he’s just watching porn instead of cheating.
I’m so sorry that so many women on here are being so hateful. If you two discussed porn before you got married and he agreed with you and then watched it that is a betrayal. I’m not a big fan or porn because it can distort the chemical reactions in your brain causing issues with real intimacy, religion or not this much has been proven through science. I hope you two can heal your marriage through counseling, prayer and God’s grace. God can absolutely heal porn addition if your husband wants him to.
Be glad he turned to porn and not another woman. 
You should definitely ask this question to a more religion-based group or apparently you get some rude comments or people that are just not on the same page. Talk to your church group leader if you have one.
Tell him Pornhub has a great selection… 🤷
I’m a Christian and at times have struggled with watching pornography. It is a sin the same as all others. He’ll need to turn to God to help him stop and honestly, and I mean this with no disrespect, I think you need to ask God to help you. The fact that he has struggled with porn, and finally told you is a big thing. To say you don’t want him to touch you again is extreme. I would ask God to help you forgive him and encourage him instead of look down upon him. When you sin would you like him to tell you that he doesn’t want anything to do with you? I know it hurts but, he didn’t cheat on you. If he had actually had sex with another woman I could understand you not wanting him to touch you, but he didn’t.
sounds like it isn’t against his religion lol
In my personal opinion, as his wife, you have no right to tell him what he can and can not watch. It would be like him telling you, you can not watch reality tv because it makes him uncomfortable.
Men are naturally curious and want to see what else is out there, if he is innocently watching porn in his own home and not out running around on you, honestly nothing is more innocent. No harm comes from looking at someone on the tv. It quells curiosities and feeds a need men have that you will not be able to fulfill.
If you have a problem with pornography, heaven help you, honey, because that will just push him away from you.
If anything, open your mind and watch it together, it will enhance your sex life and turn you both on, and bring you closer together.
Nothing good will come from telling him, no, and even worse making him feel shame or guilt.
Im sorry but DAMN you need to chill girlfriend. Its not like he went out and cheated. And he shouldnt be made to feel like he did. The fact that you feel like you cant even look at him or let him touch you is ridiculous in my opinion (which is why you posted right? For others opinions)
I feel bad for your husband bc youre making him feel so guilty over something so small. Yes, if you guys had talked about it before hand (no pun intended) and he told you he wasnt but he has been, youre right to feel he betrayed your trust. But its tough bc like you said, hes uncomfortable coming forward about things bc hes afraid of your reaction, which sad because he should be able to confide in his wife without being made to feel hes done something wrong.
I think counseling is a good idea. Not just for him but for you as well because i think theyre are some underlying issues here with you that need to be resolved.
Personally i dont give my man a hard time about it at all bc lately im exhausted all the time (18 month old teething getting her molars and getting over croup) so if he wants to do his business and watch porn then GREAT. As long as he isnt out and getting strange i dont care. I understand he has needs and if he wants to take care of those needs without cheating on me more power to him.
HOWEVER, all that being said, i would have an issue with the fact that he turns you down saying hes tired or what have you but still watches porn instead. I can understand once maybe twice being too tired to engage with your SO and just wanting to get it done with on your own, but making it a habit is strange to say the least and you should get down to the bottom of that first.
Im sorry if ive sounded kind of bitchy in my comment i just dont believe you should feel so withdrawn from him over the simple fact that he watched some porn. And the rest is just good ol honesty which unfortunately sometimes comes off as harsh.
I hope that you guys can work through this. Y’all are married. You took vows. You can work through it if you work at it.
Really? Your partner is allowed to watch porn. You can’t tell him what he can and cannot watch. Porn isn’t evil. He could have turn to another woman. Instead he chose to watch porn and remain loyal to you.
This really has nothing to with religion. It has to do with the fact you are insecure. You could always ask to watch porn with him.
I would be more worried that he has a problem lying to you more than anything. Maybe sit down with him and have a serious conversation as to why he thinks you are not approachable. He says he would rather avoid the argument. So maybe find a healthier way for him to feel comfortable in coming to you in any situation. While I could careless if my husband watches it or not, it is definitely better than a cheating spouse. Ask him why he is watching it? Does he feel like he is not getting what he needs from you? Does he have a higher sex drive than you. Get to the root of the problem. Once you do, maybe then he will stop watching porn.
Look if u dont want to trust him send him to me aleast he is not sleeping with other woman
Watch it with him and learn some new moves😉
What do you think you’re doing when you make babies??? Same thing, just not recorded you need to lighten up or your husbands gonna end up wondering into another woman’s arms, he already doesn’t tell you the truth about things cause of your reaction, good luck to you both
Imagine not being able to watch porn because of your religion… bummer lmao
Try it out, watch it with him. Learn new things together, makes things a lot more fun and interesting.
I’m single but when I wasn’t I encouraged porn and going to the strippers together!
To be honest to whomever wrote this question you were wrong if you have never been taught you never take your problems to unbelievers they will give you worldly answers so if that’s what you want feel free to recieve what you get but as a believer you need to keep your thing between you your husband and God. You took a vow to honor him and because he slipped your shaming him, you may not have ever done this but I’m sure if you slipped he wouldn’t turn on you and be embarrassed of you. Put your self in his shoes and try praying for strenght for your husband. While yes your husband is the head of your family and covers you hes now at a point where he needs covering so be that for him dont paint a target on his back. Seek counseling but seek Godly counseling. We live in this world and we are not part of this world. Be strong and be his help meet now because he needs you now more than ever be grateful he came to you because this could’ve stayed a secret,this is his cry for help.
Andy Hughes you’re going to hell 
I’m so sorry your going thru this. It is a very painful thing to go through. I know. Please ask your very real and very valid question in a group that will value your beliefs and support you And your husband instead of this group. This group has some hateful people in it.
This is what I know. Nobody is truly religious. You can’t follow half the rules and call yourself a christian. He’s a liar, you’re not submitting to your husband, and you’re speaking your mind. So??? Maybe porn has nothing to do with your religion and more to do with your personal beliefs.
I understand because I had this problem with my ex-husband for years. I grew up in the church so it was always “it’s a sin, don’t do it.” I honestly felt like it was cheating. Now I am in my 30s and equate it to women reading a romance novel. Men are visual creatures. Sounds like you two maybe just need to spice it up?
I rather him watch porn than cheat. Watch it with him. It might spice up your sex lives.
ok but on a serious note, if you’re lds, I know of a page specifically for stuff like this.
Better to watch it then be hiding behind your back with someone else.
It could be so much worse we are not perfect and we are made siners we are not perfect by and means and we make mistakes I’m not crazy about porn but my husband well I don’t even say anything their been a couple time he’s gotten like addicted by over all I really don’t care as long as it not some local girl or something their men their going to do it weather we like it or not just in their DNA he could be out cheating or watching porn which would you prefer 20 mins of them in the bathroom or weeks and month of affairs
… Let him take video/pictures of you. Your his wife. You’re married. Nothing wrong with that 🤷
As a devout christian you will turn to God for your worries and concerns and speak openly with your husband as you said thru counseling. He made the first huge step by being honest with you and evidently more honest than you truly expected but you have to forgive him not just for him but for yourself for this not to carry a burden upon you and mess up your marriage that is what forgiveness is for cleansing your own burdens to set you free from them keeping you from going forward. You love your husband and we are all only human. He seems to be sincere and wanting to change - stand by him and walk through this change with him.
Where in the Bible does it say watching porn is wrong?
How can sex be against a religion it’s procreation. A natural part of life. No big deal to me. But if it’s hurting you so deeply go and talk to your church.
Watch it with him. Times have changed, it’s not shameful. You just might like it to. Your young, experiment a little.
All men watch porn. Religious or not. I’m happy he’s honest about it. Good luck!
Let’s be honest. You aren’t bothered because of your religion, you’re bothered because he’s watching porn. Get over it.
I think half these comments are uncalled for. Doesnr matter if its “just porn” hes lied to her for years about it (unless ive read post wrong) thats why she feels betrayed. Id feel betrayed if i was lied to about things for a long period of time
Maybe I should pay attention to religion because didn’t know porn was a sin lol. My husband and I watch it all the time lol. Watch it with him. Get on all 4s and let him go at it.
Ooooo maybe get a dirty nun outfit. Could be sexy to him and bam.
Honestly what’s more alarming than him watching porn is his bs excuse of why he lies to you. That’s super toxic behavior to attempt to shift the blame onto you about why he keeps things from you and lies to you about it. Make sure the counselor you go see is well aware of it.
He’s very obviously bored with the sex he is getting which is making him turn to porn. Try to spice it up in the bedroom. Men have needs just as much as women do and if he’s bored and only turning to porn and not another woman, you’re lucky. Should he lie to you about it or hide things? No. But chastising him and making him feel like an indecent person isn’t going to solve the problem. Counseling is a great step but I wouldn’t expect him to not watch porn because that’s what guys do. My man and I have crazy sex all the time and he still watches porn when I’m not there. It’s about honesty, acceptance, and compromise on both of your parts.
Yes porn is considered adultery to the true Christians he can ask God for forgiveness and repent by not watching it. Jesus said to look with lust is to commit adultery in the heart, Matthew 5:27, 28. All non Christians can have their say on this matter but if you are a true follower of Christ you need to turn from all sin. Jesus didn’t die for you to stay the way you are. You must be born again.
I have different views but maybe try spicing things up a little. Dress yourself up and maybe suggest making a video of your own or allow him to take pictures of you in poses that he likes. I’m sure you two will make it through this with a little work. Honestly I wouldn’t involve anyone else unless it continues.
If he’s married to you you’re lucky he doesn’t have a drug problem.
How’s porn a sin? You do realize sex is how you got pregnant right?? 
Everybody watches porn. If they say they don’t, they probably do. Religion or not.
WAIT…porn is a sin? Shit I’m doomed for hell then FUCK
Oh brother! Eye rolling
Where does it say in the bible you can’t watch porn…maybe you need to lighten up a bit in your marriage. If he can’t tell you anything cause of the reaction you will give him says it all. Your husband should be comfortable enough to tell you anything. Sounds like you might have anger problems and that’s why yous ain’t close anymore.
Grow up. Men watch porn. No harm in that
Porn is not against Christianity
I would rather have my husband watch porn then go out and cheat on me or go to a strip club. I don’t have an issue with it. I’m not offended by stuff like that. If that’s the worst that he’s doing you’re pretty lucky
Bitch it’s porn. Yeah if I was you I would just let him go. you already know what you want and it’s to be prissy and holier than thou, he wants to beat his cock off, I seriously bet you only want to do missionary and don’t really enjoy sucking dick.
It’s just porn. I would be glad that he wasn’t cheating on me. 
Men watch porn. That’s just what they do. The only part that concerns me is the part where OP says they don’t have sex a lot. So is he watching porn instead of having sex? Bc that I could see as being an issue - like he’s choosing porn over her. Otherwise a complete overreaction.
I totally understand your feelings & I’m sorry you’re dealing with this.
I think this group is not a place to ask. Try talking to your pastor/preacher, church friends etc. There are many non believers who are going to have different opinions then what the bible says 
Always remember, just because most of these females are okay with it, doesnt mean you have to be.
Why did I even bother to read this. Just get the hell over it.
1 … & ¢ _:blush:
I’d be more upset he lies. Who cares if he watched porn? Tell him to grow up, put his big boy pants on and be honest or you’ll dip. And maybe watch porn WITH him.
The lying is the biggest concern for me. I also do not agree with porn in a relationship because of personal reasons and insecurities and that’s fine! They are my feelings and are valid. And the one I’m with can respect it or not. Though they should since they signed up with me and I’m open about my concerns with it. As your man should be with yours. Despite your Christian views you are a person he loves and chooses and he should respect your feelings on something. You said you know he lies often just to avoid arguments. That’s not fair. You deserve truths too.
Wow, the judgement from the people on here is alarming. First of all, yes it is a sin for Christians. “Spicing up the bedroom” will not help at all. Look into an accountability software. I highly recommend him reading Everyman’s Battle.
You said he lies bc he is afraid of your reaction… (there is the problem) I wouldn’t want to admit to something wrong and then be made to feel guilty over and over. Take that as a hint that maybe your to overheating. It’s a natural thing for men to want to watch porn (some) I should say. Heck some women also. Religion or not sometimes it’s a cry for help in a way. Maybe he was having issues in that department, maybe he didnt feel sexy enough to you and watching porn was his way of exploring if it was him or YOU! I think you need to sit down and talk to him about this one on one and not necessarily bring someone else into it. It can be embarrassing and actually ruin the marriage further. If it were me I’d say put religion aside, spice up the marriage and maybe watch it with him… show him you want to make this work. Go get some nice "negligee " and dress up for him… I don’t know but really i think you need to be more open to his needs and why he did it.
I’d be more upset with the lying…
I think it’s nasty disrespectful and something you do not do when you are in a relationship with someone if you are not satisfied with the woman you were with then leave but you do not do that to the woman that you say you love
I use to be bothered by my man watching porn…but i took it personal as not into me…it made me insecure and then made me second guess me sexually with him…iv fought and argued and cried over it and we would be so at odds…and i hated it…i love him and it hurts my feelings esp when i feel he prefers it but i cant make him stop and id rather love him and not know what he and his phone do privately i know he isnt out cheating but regardless i feel cheated on…disrespected and the insecurities i deal with daily wondering if im good enough or why that instead of me…iv learned to just not know or ask…i dont like what i find out when i ask or look myself…and him wacking his own junk isnt enough for me to not be without him… i love him and at the moment look pass it and have learned to just not talk about it… if he ever cheats physically with another women though i wont be ok but for now and 4 yrs of fighting iv just let it go…it sucks on my end…and it still hurts…not sure any advice just personally iv delt with this and i just got tired of trying to make my point and letting it get me down…so i stopped caring or at least he thinks i stopped caring…Good luck and best wishes i know the struggle all to well…
Right. And when you make sex more exciting, he’ll stop watching porn. So judge less and participate more.
God to You:
Karen, for the millionth time, stop trying to do my job! I’m the judge, not you! Now sit tf down and be quiet. Jesus!
Jesus: Yeah, Dad?
God: Son, I told you this bit is played out. How long do we have to keep doing this?
Jesus: Ew. Rude.
It’s just porn. It’s not like he’s cheating on you
I’m at a loss as to where to begin with this one tbh.
Thed best advise is try and watch it with him and even though its against ur religious beliefs ask god for forgiveness
The people laughing are just rude i mean yeah it sounds silly but to her it’s a problem
One is this for real??? Two it’s just porn… fantasy. Not like he is out there cheating on you. And if you have issues with him telling you the truth then take a look at your marriage?
Everybody is different. I personally have no issues with porn. Hell, I watch it on occasion myself. Soooo…idk. I think your over reacting honestly.
Tbh watching porn is better than cheating.
really? would you rather him cheat with another girl or watch porn
Idk what to tell you. They ALL do it or have done it at some point in their lives. Its much more commen than you probably think
This is why religion should not be bought into real life !
My god it’s porn he’s not cheating with an actual real life woman.
Ahhh I’m sorry I don’t understand religion and how it has such a strong hold on people in real life situations!
Goodluck