My husband calls me demanding when I ask him to do things: Advice?

“And what about it?”

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If by been demanding you’re getting things done,
So be a proud Demanding Woman!!!

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Sounds like a dick tbh

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I’m petty as fuck. Spend a day loudly moaning and groaning while you do all the things.

Only clean dishes for you as you use it. Go on strike.

Or throw the whole man away.

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Tell him to fuck off!! :fu::muscle:

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Tell him to grow the fk up, that shit should be common sense. 🤦

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Just stop picking up after him and only clean up after your self.

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Maybe it’s the way you say it? His response isn’t polite but maybe you both need to evaluate your delivery and reactions.

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Message his mother to pick her child up from daycare :joy: she would probably laugh. Jokes.

Sit down and rest

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Go on strike for a few days, no cleaning or cooking, just take care of the kids, and see how he likes it

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It won’t get better. You will then be demanding he babysit his own child, change diapers, etc. And it will never be easy to leave. Good luck with whatever you decide.

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Tell him your assertive and know when to ask for help

My husband didn’t let me do shit when pregnant :rofl: he was awesome. But seriously no that’s not cool. My husband just says sure babe no problem. It’s not demanding anything for them to do their share or even asking them for help.

He probably comes from a house where things were always done for him. Explain that you shouldn’t have to ask him to do those things. He should just do them. It’s part of being an adult. And since he doesn’t like it when you ask him, then make up a list of chores and a schedule for the both of you to follow, let him participate in the decision of how the chores will be divided. It took my husband a looong time to catch up (he was a spoilt momma’s boy, who was never allowed or asked to help around the house because in his household those were women’s responsibilities :confused::face_vomiting: Until this day, his mom will not let him pick up his own plate from the dinner table when we go visit. The women are expected to go clean while the men sit down to have a drink or coffee after a meal…it drives me nuts!!!

It will not get better. If you have to ask to TAKE TRASH OUT something so simple then he needs to gooooooo. Because it’ll turn into asking him to help with the baby ect. If you have to ask a man to help around the house then in my opinion that is in fact a boy and not a man. Especially if you’re 8 months pregnant.

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Just an excuse for HIS laziness… Kinda like mine!

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These men are not children who should have to be asked to do anything that contributes to the running of a house they live in. They live there, so doing their bit to ensure the house runs smoothly isn’t ‘helping’, it’s called being a responsible adult. Newsflash: Man-babies who don’t recognise that and do their bit, who sit around while their wives do everything and who complain when asked to do something aren’t a catch ladies. And they won’t change either. They see you as a slave, and you’ll stay one until you leave them.

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Nope! I’m not pregnant and am a SAHM and I still ask for help from time to time and he helps without question. Personally, he sounds like a real douche.

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Hell I had someone tell me I was demanding because I asked for a back neck and foot rub just some affection period. I was told those treatments had to be earned. I’m not sure what’s in the water lately because they’re definitely tripping

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I do not think you’re asking much after all I mean he got you pregnant, being unexpected or planed. I would talk to your husband and tell him how you feel and then ask him why he feels as if you are “demanding”. I’m telling you this is gonna go over a lot better than what most people in here are telling you.

Also your husband could be stressed about being a father or whatever and is taking it out on you without him knowing. I don’t know what the deal is but I would have a sit down talk with him. Pray about it too.

Just know you are not asking much and I couldn’t imagine going through the changes… I know it was hard but a beautiful outcome seeing my wife go through that.

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He’s lazy and tries to get out of it.

Tell him to nut up and stop being a douche. My ex was so looked after by his mother he would expect everything to be done for him and its just :roll_eyes:

In 4 months you’ll be saying the same thing except it’ll be about him not helping with the baby. Trust me, it’s not gonna change.

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Stop asking him and leave it! When he asks why it hasn’t been done just remind him that he said you were demanding and so you aren’t demanding now!

That is so hard, my ex didn’t want to do anything and there was nothing I was able to do to change it. Try to work it out now, because when the baby comes work multiples so much, and you will be sleep deprived too.

Exactly!! Show him the difference! 8 months pregnant and expecting u to do everything when u should be resting and preparing for baby! Ugh I was with a guy that hardly didn’t do anything for himself…his mom did everything and expected me to do it too🙄

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Well, if you wanted me to be able to do everything myself I guess we shouldn’t have gotten pregnant. I can’t do it so, I guess it’s not getting done and our house is going to be filthy and gross. I’d say that and then walk out. And not say it again the next time. Let the garbage pile up till he does it. Or, only fill up to a point that you can still move it and then leave the 20 barely filled up garbage bags behind his car so he has to move them and notice how many bags you’re wasting making sure you can move them.

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You shouldn’t have to ask him.period. he lives there too. You need to rest don’t do nothing and let him see how it could be. Your about to have a newborn too. Girl tell him your the wife not the maid and you only have one baby.

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An ex was prone to leave his underwear behind the bathroom door, until one of his friends called him out on it. I tried my best to get his cooperation. Needless to say, nothing much happened, thus he is my ex.

My first question…did his mom wait on him hand and foot when he was at home? If so, there’s your answer! My first husband wanted me to iron his undershirts and briefs because that what him mom did…I told him it was NOT HAPPENING in our house!!! We were married all of 3 years and have been divorced for 40 years!

If it makes you feel any better, we just bought a gutter house and mines expecting me to manage an autistic 3 year old and a 5 year old while cleaning the walls and painting and removing carpet. All so he can go mushroom hunting because “he’s doing something for himself” :joy:.

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If he can’t help take money from the bank for a leaner. You sit back and relax as well.

Obviously he has no idea what marriage is all about!! So, you need to make a decision…once the baby comes there will be a lot more work. He either steps up or you made a poor choice in a man…Talk to him, if he is willing to change, great but if not then you need to make a major decision…good luck!

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You need to have a open conversation with him about it. Don’t hype yourself up before, just tell him how he makes you feel and ask him how he would like you to ask for help. You need to discuss this with your husband. Your relationship is not about to get any easier and open conversations save marriages.

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I’d demand that he go sleep on the couch🤷‍♀️

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Oy!:woman_facepalming:t2: L A Z Y… no ma’am, that is not demanding. Besides the fact he should already be helping out in the house, you are now later in pregnancy and he SHOULD be helping take some stress and responsibility off of you MORE than simple tasks. Tell him to adult up or toodle out. Stop doing all his things. Don’t pick up after him or do his laundry. When it directly affects him, perhaps then he’ll notice.
Ps MY 10 YO VACCUMS THE FLOOR NO PROBLEM. Just sayin :woman_shrugging:t2:

Ok, men are not the brightest and truth be told they don’t know how to love us. Clap back with, but you love it, so much in fact, you knocked me up :joy::rofl: so do some chores around here and help a mama out, it’s hard work to develop a baby inside, you had the easy part.

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I’d Show Him What Demanding Is!! Teach him a Valuable Lesson.

Advice: get a new one.

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You need to talk to him, ask him what about the way you ask seems demanding. It could be your tone that comes across demanding or if you are asking face to face your body language. Your body language could also come across as demanding. He may just be overreacting, but unless y’all communicate with one another effectively, then you will never resolve anything. We are all guilty of doing things that can come across to someone else differently than we mean it too. My husband has told me many times that whenever we get on any topic surrounding the law or a legal issue, that I tend to talk down to him or become condescending. Of course I was like you are just being overly sensitive. Until he recorded me one night and I could see and hear for myself that he was right.

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You should not have to be treated like tell him to do some jobs

You must be married to a grown boy, very unfortunate.

Um no. He should want to help you out to make you happy

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Send him straight to “HELL” I 'do it myself…

This is Gaslighting you, to make him not have to take responsibility, for what he is not doing. No empathy, too boot. Flip that blame back on him where is belongs, and set boundries with him.

Shame on your husband!

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Girl I went on strike recently and it worked.

You are pregnant not disabled.

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“Momma did not teach him right”

Stop doing things for him. Let him do for himself

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you need a new husband

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Divorce him. It won’t get any better.

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Sounds like narcissist tendencies to me…

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If he wants to act like a baby, make a chore chart.

Here’s a solution. Wash your clothes and towels not his. Cook enough dinner for one and wash your own plate fork and go about your business. Put a small trash can somewhere to personally use and leave the one you both use in its spot but let him me the sole user of it, take out yours not his. Now this all will leas to him asking you why you’re not cooking, washing for him and you have to follow up with him being awfully DEMANDING. Now this will take extra effort to make your point but obviously he isn’t listening to you and he needs a visual dose of his own medicine and when he tells you do it, don’t. Just like he doesn’t hear you, don’t hear him. It’s going to cause problems or it’s going to teach him his lesson. I realize this is a lot for a pregnant woman but it’s now or never. Dig your heels in and stand your ground. Are we a UNIT? and WHEN are you going to stop acting like a child and need a mother figure to tell you what to do? You want a nag? You got a nag! Do it and you don’t have to hear it. Or we can have independent routines. Hullo?

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Are you asking or demanding… perhaps show him the difference

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He’s an excuse of a man that’s why !!!

I’d say sorry you are a useless cunt

Put the lazy axx on the couch

Well, start being demanding. Show him what demanding really is :woman_shrugging:t3:

I’d leave his sorry ass.

he don’t care about u

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Tell him to kiss your ass!

If it was already done you wouldn’t have to ask. :woman_shrugging:

How are you asking? See we have a rule, if it bothers you, you do it. If I don’t want to do it, I say “when you have a chance.” That gives him or our son the option of doing it when convenient for them. Rather than my demanding it being done on my schedule, they can do it on their own. If I don’t want to wait, I do it myself.

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Just wait for that baby to arrive if he thinks you’re demanding. He needs a wake up call. Good luck

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Put a bag of potatoes around his stomach to wear all day and see how he feels! I bet he wouldn’t call you demanding then.

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Do like I used to do to my ex husband make sure all my things and my kids things were put away like normal anything of his got scooped up and thrown on his side of the bed where he has to lay at. And then explain to him if someone else had to clean up after your shit and piss drizzles you’d be mortified so why does he think it’s acceptable to do that to someone he claims to love?

Honesty is the best policy. Just reply and you are lazy. Now that we have that established please vacuum thr floor. He does that to make you feel bad and make you less likely to ask him to do chores.

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When he asks u to do something, “I’m busy making an eyeball I ain’t doing sh*t” (comedian Ali wong said that)

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No? He gets annoyed if i ask him to do like 5 things at once.
But. It isn’t 1950. I’m not his maid. I’m not his slave. He makes dirty dishes, dirty laundry and dirty floors too, so he cleans up too.

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Maybe it’s the way you say it. Do you say …take the trash out. It please take the trash out. Hey can you take the trash out. And it maybe the tone you say it too

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Pack his bags and set them outside. Demanding my arse! Smh!

If you are “mentioning” these things with the expectation that it be done “right now”, then yes, you are being demanding. But also remember that when you ask someone to do something, they have the right to say no or to do it on their schedule, not yours, because it is a request, not a demand. Turn the tables on him and don’t cook him supper. Then when he asks about it, tell him he’s being demanding.

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My husband does whatever housework is left to do when we are done dinner… We have 5 sons and I am 29 weeks pregnant… He works all day and still comes home and loves to help me out, I always say to him " Dont worry about the dishes/laundry/floors ect"… His response is always " I enjoy helping you in every way". I may have just lucked out with an amazing man :woman_shrugging:

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I’d go through my husband if he dared try that!
Asking him to help u with household jobs… its his house too! Its not just your responsibility!

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I always word things in a way that it sounds like a favor for me. “Could you take the trash out for me when you get a moment?” “If you’ve got time, I could use some help with x,y,z.” Or in a way that makes it more equal, “would you like to take care of this while take care of that?” Or “we need to get this and this done, let’s split the work, which would you like you to do?”

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You’re not his mother, or his maid, You’re his partner who is 8 months pregnant, you shouldn’t even have to ask. He should be doing his part in the home. Households are 50/50. Its not demanding its asking for help, which you shouldn’t have to do with your spouse in the first place. He should care enough that you’re 8 months pregnant to help you.

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Slap him back with and you’re lazy and I am not your mama :woman_shrugging:t2:

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Stop doing his laundry stop cooking for him he will get the hint your not his mother don’t act like it

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Remind him that these tasks are not yours alone. If things need to get done then they need to get done. He is your partner and you expect that each of you do your share of the work. You are not his keeper and it’s high time that he looks around and sees what needs to be done so you don’t have to ask him to do it.

I only ask my bf to change the cats litter and take the trash. But I mean I do say please and thank you. After that a shot glass is waiting for him. I mean maybe he thinks that’s demanding. Idk maybe try and say please. I Kno when I don’t say please it bothers my bf and now that I have. He’s been helpful. And I’m 6 months.

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And tell him he is (lazy )

Also sorry you are going through that. Sucks he’s not more supportive :disappointed:

I did everything up until the morning my water :droplet: broke. No excuses. :woman_shrugging:.

Maybe it’s just your tone

Let the trash build up and his share of chores. Don’t even ask of him no more…

Even if she comes across as demanding, that probably means she has tried asking before and he didn’t extend a hand to help. I would get irritated too if my husband wasn’t doing the simple things I ask him to do. No, it’s not demanding to want a partner to share in keeping up house, regardless of pregnancy or not.

Imma be real. That was me ex. Full on 8 months pregnant, middle of Michigan winter, and forced to walk to the store to grocery shop woth a list for his gramma and aunt( both bedridden) and of course he needed his food but he couldn’t go out, he can’t smoke his cig outside theyd get wet… and its cold…

6 years later and another kid later, things getting worse everyday, he attempts to kill me.

Now 3 years later, my fiance understands my own struggles and goes put of his way to make my day easier. He does dishes and everything else on days I cant do anything, without asking.

Theyre out there… don’t sell yourself short, or think you deserve anyone or anything else less than what you deserve.

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First …you get a shovel … then … u hit him …hard …real hard …

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My husband calls me a woodpecker when i ask him to do something. He usually forgets or doesn’t listen the first time i ask, so i say it again and get called woodpecker :confounded:

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If your pregnant, and 8 months at that, he better step up! It takes 2 to tango honey. When my wife was 8 months pregnant I did everything I could for her. I worked a full time job and then came home and cooked, cleaned, and made sure she was comfortable. Foot massages, back rubs, the works. Cleaning should be the bare minimum he’s doing

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My son called me three horses nag nag nag I thought it was hilarious

No, his calls it “b!tching”…and then I show him how a b!tch REALLY b!txhes :rofl:

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Maybe you should make him a sandwich.

So glad I’m single! The crap you women put up with makes me SMH and praise the Lord!

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If he is taking it as ‘demanding’ then try asking the same request differently…

I did everything when I was pregnant even after having a baby. I’m not married but still had a bf at the time and hated when he would do the house chores bc it was my job… Just bc someone is pregnant doesnt mean they cant get up and clean the house or do laundry unless the doctor put you on bedrest. It’s better if u get up and walk around getting some type of exercise…

He’s giving you a window to his soul… Take it for what it is!!! When the baby comes he’ll surely be the same way. Suggest marriage counseling and even go to parenting classes together. He doesn’t want reality to slap him in his face but that may be what needs to happen!